I am sorry

I just installed Microsoft Edge on Linux

I am so sorry

Hey, @google! I found a bug. The last 3 choices are missing.
The lack of balance is disturbing me.

And on Fridays we all say together...

✨
✨ DON'T ✨
✨
✨ PUSH ✨
✨ ✨
✨ TO ✨
✨
✨ PRODUCTION ✨
✨
✨

Guess who just got rewarded from the Internet Fuckin Bug Bounty 😎

Today I learned:

`/usr` stands for “universal system resources” not “user”

`/dev` stands for “device” not “development”

Had no idea.

Programmer's Valentine!
The only date he gets is software up-date.

This passes all unit tests

1 . Seen it
2 . Mind blown
3 . Why i didn't thought of that
I loveee the ideea

Exactly

You can't.

No doubts, the software engineers suggested this.

Tooo many courses & projects in wishlist, too little time.

Yesterday i bought train ticket to go home and at the ATM this happened :
@wowotek : tell me the exact price nominal
@aureliagbrl : 293,000 Rupiahs (~10 USD)
Me : *entering the nominal fast and rough* 2,930,000
A : hey careful you put too much zero--
Me: *just realize but i clicked the accept button too quickly* doesn't matter my savings is only 6 digits. *re entering the correct nominal*

...

Also Broke ass me : *cries in the corner*

Life is Hard.

Sir, please write a simple program, just a very basic one.

me: Writes Hello World in Python

Didnt get the job.

Programmers humour

The newest iPhone really seems like a top notch smartphone!

Please don’t kill me 😅

Its not what it looks like... mom...

windows update code

function update(){
print("10%");
print("30%");
print("50%");
print("99%");
_doActualUpdate();
_mineBitcoin();
print("100%");
return;
}

Our prayers have been answered

!dev

const children = {
length: 1,
data: [{
name: "noah",
gender: "male"}]
};

children.length++;
children.data.push({
name: "mina",
gender: "female"
});

const happy = true;

We all did that at least one time

Best example 😄

Maths : 1
Google : 0

(Q: How much are you allowed to Google as a developer?)

“You’re allowed to Google as much as you want. This is not school, you’re employed to solve a problem. Nobody cares whether you Google for the answer or remember the answer from another Googling.”

My coworker boys and girls..

To whoever stole my Microsoft Office license I will find and kill you!

You have my Word

Logging work in Jira, because it goes against the whole ethos of trusting people to get the work done when they have to log exactly how much time they spent on each individual story. It also doesnt account for pair programming. so 2 people log the same time and it looks like the story took twice as long. I’ll stop now because I’m precariously close to opening the “time based estimates” can of worms and thats for another rant.

Interview

HR: So .. tell us .. where do you see our AI acting in 5 years?

ME: Doing your job minus the stupid questions.

*silence*

Boss breaks out in laughter.
"Oh boy you're hired"

The good spaghetti code stuff