Ghost in the Shell (2017)

- Knock, knock

- An async function

- Who's there?

My friend said this,

Roses are red,
The screen turned blue,
I'm not a programmer,
What the fuck do I do.

When you have the users test your application

Screw Emojis!!

Client asks how many days will it take to implement feature XYZ.

I say 3 days. But Skype had other plans.

How to vertically center in css..

That's a good one!

:P How to save people

When you're preparing for a hard disk format:

I'm proud to announce a new project made by myself and @thejohnhoffer, that started on devrant.

We started collaborating after I made a rant about machine learning and, since then we've been working hard on a plain language blog that simplifies machine learning concepts.
We call it learn-blog.
Check it out at ironman5366.github.io/learn-blog

when your code is a mess but everything work out in the end

"Knock Knock"

"Who's there?" 

"Knock Knock"

"Who's there?" 

"Knock Knock"

"Who's there?" 

- DoS Attack

This never gets old...

So this is an update of the afore mentioned IT related RPG I am making. I have settled on the title "Lords of Bullshit: a tale of corporate incompetence".

I need some ideas guys. I have Java, C, Python, PHP, bash and git as skill types, but I need spells for each.

For example in C I have malloc and dealloc as spells (revive and death spells).

I am having trouble with Java spells. I am trying to come up with things that focus on OOP or reflection and meta programming, but I am having trouble.

Any ideas? Also, anyone want to help with some sprites? All of the sprites the character generator can make are medieval looking.

Hone your skills and it will get easier to do things

Bill gates found a bottle in his garden.
He decided to rub it thrice (whyever) and a geany surged.

Bill gates: h.. He.. Hello?
Geany : hi, im willing to give you one wish as you saved me
Bill gates: I WANT WORLD PEACE, HERE IS THE MAP WITH ALL THE WARS ON THE WORLD!!
Geany: thats impossible. Other wishes?
Bill gates: fix every bug in windows vista!
Geany: gimme that world map

The JS Drinking Game:

1. Think of a noun.
2. Google "<noun>.js"
3. If a libary with that name exists, drink!

"Can you give me an estimate on how long it will take you to fix this bug?"

"That's like asking how long it will take to find my keys."

We were doing some temp work, and a girl we were working with had gone out to talk to her boyfriend on the phone.

1. Flip screen orientation 180 degress
2. Take screenshot
3. Set that as wallpaper and flip back
4. Hide icons, hide taskbar, move taskbar to far right edge
5. Invert mouse movement
6. Invert mouse buttons
7. Flip back 180 degrees, everything looks normal.

Sit back, relax and watch the show.

P.S. she gave up, we had to fix it.

Void ReleaseDopamine ()
{
ShowDoggyPicture("quot.png");
RandomJoke();
}

didn't anyone go for the "#define true false" joke? i didn't actually see it in action, but it would be a pretty harsh one.

Can't argue with this

Hey geeky girl,
Roses are #ff0000
Violets are #0000ff
I use hex codes, but I’d use RGB for you.

Yet to try it in real life.

One time I wanted to use my mouse and it didn't work, the light was on and everything seemed normal, I flipped it upside down and I found a troll face sticker on the laser led ...

I was so bored and I typed this on Google search "a;sldkfj" and the meaning came...

What a New Year..

Map, Filter and reduce explained!

[Found this on Reddit] - Always explain in terms of hamburgers. ;)

At my previous job we had the rule to lock your PC when you leave. Makes sense of course.
We were not programmers but application engineers, still, we worked with sensitive data.

One colleague always claimed to be the most intelligent and always demanded the "senior" - title. Which he obviously did not deserve.

multiple times a day forgot to lock his workstation and we had to do it for him.
My last week working there, I've had it. He forgot it again... So I made a screenshot of his current environment. Closed everything. Set his new background with the screen shot and killed explorer (windows). Then finally I locked his PC.

When he came back he panicked that his PC froze. He couldn't do shit anymore. Not knowing what to do... 😂
Which makes him a senior of course.

But seriously, first thing I would do is open the task manager and notice that explorer wasn't running... Thus my background with the taskbar isn't real.... My colleagues must be pranking me!

Nope... The "senior" knew little

How does a front-end developer get away with murder?

$('body').hide();

//I'll see myself out

How software is managed...