Dear Skype,

If EA had developed their own Programming Language:
Iteration DLC ~20€
Condition DLC ~15€
Connectivity DLC ~12,99€
Gold Edition ~120€

Rare old picture of a Linux Sysadmin enjoying a mug of tea after a hard day at work

When you look at the old projects you abandoned on github

Loser.

This "double tap to ++" feature is awesome, BUT I NEED SOME KIND OF FEEDBACK 😠😠😠😂

Professor : Explain deadlock and I will give you full marks.

Me:- You give me full marks and I'll explain deadlock.

They are here

I feel It's Completely True 😂

This dev world is still so damn fucking sexist, it's driving me nuts.

"it's so cool seing a GIRL doing this stuff"
"wow you're so tech savy for a GIRL"
"you're too CUTE to be a developer"
"how does it feel to be a GIRL in dev"

Just treat us like fucking human beings for once instead of pretty, empty objects.

Me when I'm FREE :
Hmm, I don't have anything to do, let's sleep for 10 hours..

Me when I have to STUDY :
Let's watch that latest episode of Mr. Robot
Let's complete that side-project I started to 10 years ago..
Let's learn something new in Android Development...
Let's scroll devRant..

the optimal size for my dev team is two.

me and whisky.

This made me laugh hard

Teacher: press F5

Student: presses f then 5

Me: dies

Here's a list of unpopular stuff which I agree with:

1) I love Java more than any other programming language.

2) I love sleeping more than working.

3) I'm not a night owl. I thrive the most during daylight.

4) I don't like or need coffee. Tea is fine.

5) Webdev is a huge clusterfuck which I secretly wish that could just die already.

6) Cybersecurity is a meme and actually not that interesting. Same passes for Cloud, Machine Learning and Big Data.

7) Although I'm a huge fan of it Linux is too unstable and non-idiot proof to ever become mainstream on the desktop.

8) Windows is actually a pretty solid OS.

9) The real reason I don't use macos is because I'm a poorfag that can't afford an overpriced laptop.

10) I don't like math and I hate that people push math shit into random interview questions for dev jobs which have nothing to do with math.

Post yours.

normal person: what's your most used emoticon?
me: );
person: aww why sad?
me: you can actually see ); in 75% of my code
person: what
me: disappears();

So I was browsing devrant and a friend asked what all languages do I know? I said, python, c, c++
He looked at me like 😐
Took me a moment to realise he was asking languages not programming languages 😅

This is what happens when you listen to clients

After 1,5 months of customer support as a Linux support engineer, I can honestly say:

Fuck wordpress.

So adopting this price list. Like right now.

Old fart joke received from another old fart :) simply had to share as I am still laughing 😂

Normal ghosts: "Boo"
Developer ghosts: "Bool"

How to hack:
1: Open commandline
2: color 2
3: cd c:/
4: tree
...
5: Profit

HTTP response code cheat sheet
(From /r/Programmer humor)

Me: *desperately trying to finish a webpage before 5pm deadline*
Girlfriend: Why are you always so focused on your computer? You never pay attention to me.
Me: You know I have to work. Besides, you'll always be number 1 in my heart
Girlfriend: Aww that was cute. Okay I'll let you finish working
Me to me: ...arrays start at 0. *continues typing*

Disclaimer: this was stolen from /r/programmerhumor and I have no girlfriend

Welcome to android where Progress Bars are Spinners and Spinners are lists.

Android development is like:
- 30% of the time is coding & debugging
- 70% of the time is waiting for Gradle to build

'Android studio and RAM.'

is definitely a better story than

'Human beings and French Fries'.

Rob :Truth or Dare

Android Dev:Dare

Rob: Uninstall and reinstall your android studio with SDKs @50kbps

Android Dev:Truth