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Search - "cloud 9"
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Here's a list of unpopular stuff which I agree with:
1) I love Java more than any other programming language.
2) I love sleeping more than working.
3) I'm not a night owl. I thrive the most during daylight.
4) I don't like or need coffee. Tea is fine.
5) Webdev is a huge clusterfuck which I secretly wish that could just die already.
6) Cybersecurity is a meme and actually not that interesting. Same passes for Cloud, Machine Learning and Big Data.
7) Although I'm a huge fan of it Linux is too unstable and non-idiot proof to ever become mainstream on the desktop.
8) Windows is actually a pretty solid OS.
9) The real reason I don't use macos is because I'm a poorfag that can't afford an overpriced laptop.
10) I don't like math and I hate that people push math shit into random interview questions for dev jobs which have nothing to do with math.
Post yours.279 -
1. I join a company.
2. I get deeply involved in "how to run the company", and get nice compliments from both coworkers & management about my skills in conveying startup/scaleup advice & necessities to upper management.
3. With my ego inflated through all the sweet talk, I think "ah, what the hell, let's do this again", and I accept a Lead/CTO promotion. I have to join board meetings, write reports on quarterly plans and progress.
4. I get unhappy/stressed/burned-out because I really just want to be a developer, not a manager/executive.
5. Upper management understands, I give up my lead position, lock myself back into my coding cave.
6. I get annoyed because the requirements I receive become more and more disconnected from reality, half of the teams seem to have decided to stop using agile/scrum, the testing pipeline breaks all the time, I get an updated labor contract from HR by mail which smells like charred flesh, etc
7. The annoyances become too much to do ANY work. I yell at the other devs outside of the entrance of my cave. There is no answer, only a few painful moans and sighs.
8. I emerge from my cave. The city has turned into a desolate wasteland. The office is a burning ruin, the air sharp and heavy with black soot. Disemboweled corpses of developers litter the poisoned soil.
Product Managers dressed in stained ripped suits scream at each other while they try to reinforce concrete barricades with scotch tape and post-its. *THUMP* Something enormous is trying to break through. "Thank God, bittersweet, you're still alive! The stakeholders! They have mutated! We couldn't meet the promised deadlines! We've lost the whole mobile app department, and that kid there is the last of the backenders and he's only an intern! You're here to save us, right? RIGHT?".
In the corner, between the overflowing coffee machine and a withered cactus, a young boy has collapsed onto the floor. His face is covered in moldy coffee grounds, clasping on to his closed macbook for dear life, wide-open eyes staring into the void, mumbling: "didn't backup the database, and It's all gone" over and over.
A severely dented black Tesla with a dragging loose bumper breaks through the dried up vertical herb garden and the smoothiebar, and comes to a halt against the beanbags in a big cloud of styrofoam balls.
The CEO limps out, leaking blood all over the upholstery. He yells to the COO: "The datacenter is completely flooded with sewage! I saved the backup tapes though", holding a large nest of tangled black magnetic tape mixed with clumps of mud above his head.
9. I collect my outstanding salary and sell any rewarded options/shares for a low dumping price, take a 5 month holiday, and ask a recruiter about opportunities in a different city.14 -
1) Starts a company that builds cloud systems
2) Takes a bunch of jobs and thought you'll be happy for a while
3) IoT era smashes in your face
4) 72% of your existing clients ask for IoT revamp
5) With a lot of hacking you made a small portion of the projects possible with some Raspberry Pis
6) Client bought a bunch of arbitrary parts from Shenzhen and now you have to deal with kernel overlays and shits that you didn't even heard of
7) Made it work for the second time and told yourself it'll never happen again
8) Last customer happy so they tell a bunch of friends and now they're asking for more
9) Stares into void, wondering how you gonna end this nightmare5 -
Officially resigned this morning from my helpdesk position.
in two weeks I officially begin my career as a junior dev. I'm on cloud 9 and yet still don't believe it.7 -
TLDR; My 2TB HDD got wiped in one fell swoop by a 9-year old child.
You know... I've never been too great about keeping backups. Even to this day, I only keep one or two local backups and nothing on the "cloud".
So this was about 5 years ago. At the time, I was living together with my girlfriend - who would later become my wife. She had a son from a previous relationship, who at the time was 9 years old.
I had a small desk in the living room of our one-bedroom apartment, that I used for my computer, which has been a laptop for a long time now. One unfortunate thing about the layout of the apartment was that the wall plug near my desk was attached to a light switch.
I had a 2TB external hard drive - with its own power cable - plugged into my laptop. Then, things started to move in slow motion... The GF's son comes inside from playing, my GF asks him to turn off the light. He reaches over, and shuts off power to my laptop - and the external hard drive.
He must have hit that switch at JUST the right fucking time. The laptop ran on battery, no big deal. The hard drive, when I powered it back up - was wiped clean. I tried data recovery on it, but the HDD was encrypted, which makes things more complicated.
Needless to say, I was not happy. I never got that data back, but I did learn not to expose my hard drives to 9 year olds. Very dangerous little creatures.
You want to know the best part? He destroyed another hard drive of mine, a few years later. Should I tell that story?5 -
Had to interview a "Tech Lead" who apparently has 9 years of experience in Enterprise Java, AWS, spring cloud, microservices and all the in-demand tech jargon you can think of. Plus has mentioned he has cleared OCJP (java certification) with 90% marks.
So I ask him how do microservices work - he says there's another team handling it.
I give a simple string manipulation problem and ask him to write code in an IDE or explain the logic with pseudocode and get this..
He says since he is a lead I cannot ask him to write code and should only ask about his experience.
I'm like - Sure Sir. While I do that, I will also put in a strong recommendation for you to be hired, give up all my salary to you, become your slave for life and order your lunch everyday with my savings.6 -
Teaching my homeschooled son about prime numbers, which of course means we need to also teach prime number determination in Python (his coding language of choice), when leads to a discussion of processing power, and a newly rented cloud server over at digital ocean, and a search of prime number search optimizations, questioning if python is the right language, more performance optimizations, crap, the metrics I added are slowing this down, so feature flags to toggle off the metrics, crap, I actually have a real job I need to get back to. Oooh, I'm up to prime numbers in two millions, and , oh, I really should run that ssh session in screen so it keeps running if I close my laptop. I could make this a service and let it run in the background. I bet there's a library for this. He's only 9. We've already talked about encryption and the need to find large prime numbers.3
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1. take a web application working in somebody computer since 4 years with tons of features.
2. Believe that the application is the future and solve brilliantly a general market need.
3. multiply income of current only customer by 10: you are going to be rich.
3. start to install 2, 3 customers.
4. discover the application is shit. Doesn't solve well the problem. Functionalities are different for each customer
5. discover that customers are willing to pay 1/10th of the original customer
6. quickly reingeneer the application to a multitenant cloud application, because with 3 customers and different versions you are already in deep shit
7. keep giving away the application for free to flagship customers. With a lot of customisation developed for free.
8. reach 200 customers in 5 years and still no break even, but lot of debts
9. resort to financial tricks to keep the company going
Luckily money are not mine. They could be recovered.
Unluckily the time spent was mine. It couldn't be recovered
Hope that the application will finally crash so that I can move on to the next thing: retirement in a mental asylum -
Not a rant but I'm not sure if I made the right choice. I got really curious this year in cloud infrastructure and started studying for my AWS Solutions Architect Exam. The company I work for (large company) allows me to switch roles/teams. Last week I was so bored with frontend I requested to switch to the Platform engineering team. The Engineer manager slacked me this morning....
PE Manager: I'll see you at standup this morning.
Me: Cool ill be there at 9, where is it? By the cafe?
PE Manager: No, in hell. Glad you joined the team 😃
What did I get myself into.1 -
I am amazed that nobody mentioned Cloud9. I have been using it for 3 years and it is the best Cloud IDE ever.7
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It's been a while DevRant!
Straight back into it with a rant that no doubt many of us have experienced.
I've been in my current job for a year and a half & accepted the role on lower pay than I normally would as it's in my home town, and jobs in development are scarce.
My background is in Full Stack Development & have a wealth of AWS experience, secure SaaS stacks etc.
My current role is a PHP Systems Developer, a step down from a senior role I was in, but a much bigger company, closer to home, with seemingly a lot more career progression.
My job role/descriptions states the following as desired:
PHP, T-SQL, MySQL, HTML, CSS, JavaScript, Jquery, XML
I am also well versed in various JS frameworks, PHP Frameworks, JAVA, C# as well as other things such as:
Xamarin, Unity3D, Vue, React, Ionic, S3, Cognito, ECS, EBS, EC2, RDS, DynamoDB etc etc.
A couple of months in, I took on all of the external web sites/apps, which historically sit with our Marketing department.
This was all over the place, and I brought it into some sort of control. The previous marketing developer hadn't left and AWS access key, so our GitLabs instance was buggered... that's one example of many many many that I had to work out and piece together, above and beyond my job role.
Done with a smile.
Did a handover to the new Marketing Dev, who still avoid certain work, meaning it gets put onto me. I have had a many a conversation with my line manager about how this is above and beyond what I was hired for and he agrees.
For the last 9 months, I have been working on a JAVA application with ML on the back end, completely separate from what the colleagues in my team do daily (tickets, reports, BI, MI etc.) and in a multi-threaded languages doing much more complicated work.
This is a prototype, been in development for 2 years before I go my hands on it. I needed to redo the entire UI, as well as add in soo many new features it was untrue (in 2 years there was no proper requirements gathering).
I was tasked initially with optimising the original code which utilised a single model & controller :o then after the first discussion with the product owner, it was clear they wanted a lot more features adding in, and that no requirement gathering had every been done effectively.
Throughout the last 9 month, arbitrary deadlines have been set, and I have pulled out all the stops, often doing work in my own time without compensation to meet deadlines set by our director (who is under the C-Suite, CEO, CTO etc.)
During this time, it became apparent that they want to take this product to market, and make it as a SaaS solution, so, given my experience, I was excited for this, and have developed quite a robust but high level view of the infrastructure we need, the Lambda / serverless functions/services we would want to set up, how we would use an API gateway and Cognito with custom claims etc etc etc.
Tomorrow, I go to London to speak with a major cloud company (one of the big ones) to discuss potential approaches & ways to stream the data we require etc.
I love this type of work, however, it is 100% so far above my current job role, and the current level (junior/mid level PHP dev at best) of pay we are given is no where near suitable for what I am doing, and have been doing for all this time, proven, consistent work.
Every conversation I have had with my line manager he tells me how I'm his best employee and how he doesn't want to lose me, and how I am worth the pay rise, (carrot dangling maybe?).
Generally I do believe him, as I too have lived in the culture of this company and there is ALOT of technical debt. Especially so with our Director who has no technical background at all.
Appraisal/review time comes around, I put in a request for a pay rise, along with market rates, lots of details, rates sources from multiple places.
As well that, I also had a job offer, and I rejected it despite it being on a lot more money for the same role as my job description (I rejected due to certain things that didn't sit well with me during the interview).
I used this in my review, and stated I had already rejected it as this is where I want to be, but wanted to use this offer as part of my research for market rates for the role I am employed to do, not the one I am doing.
My pay rise, which was only a small one really (5k, we bring in millions) to bring me in line with what is more suitable for my skills in the job I was employed to do alone.
This was rejected due to a period of sickness, despite, having made up ALL that time without compensation as mentioned.
I'm now unsure what to do, as this was rejected by my director, after my line manager agreed it, before it got to the COO etc.
Even though he sits behind me, sees all the work I put in, creates the arbitrary deadlines that I do work without compensation for, because I was sick, I'm not allowed a pay rise (doctors notes etc supplied).
What would you do in this situation?4 -
Apple, next time you want to get me to upgrade my file system, please FUCKING TELL ME IT WONT LET ME INSTALL WINDOWS USING BOOTCAMP, 9 hours and I’ve only just found the file system that will let me run Adobe Cloud and Windows
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🔥👽🤘🏻
I've been CRUSHING it lately, so stoked!!!
**Also, this means that in the near future something will crush me because I have a few subjects on deck I need to lock down.
1. Deno
2. TypeScript(deep dive)
3. CPP (currently 75% done with my 2nd masterclass, first one complete)
4. Multi-platform local device storage (Sqflite/mongoDB/shared preferences/Hive)
5. REST/api/requests/json management && application
6. Implementing Firebase authentication using Apple, Twitter, and mobile OTP
7. Cloud functions && server scripting/automation
8. Intro to embedded systems/OS/kernels
9. Steadily improve my code style, design strategies, and build patterns that are team friendly && provide easier code base maintainibilty
10. Influence, teach, and/or spark the interest of someone new to development in any possible- all that matters is getting new people on board, making sure they are stoked about, and last but not least making sure they feel welcome in the community and are able to start off in the right direction.
cheers, ya fockers!!!! -
so, i was on cloud 9 after having learnt n mastered(hopefully) angularjs..but the devs said wait, u r outdated, we r up with angular2..i was up for the challenge, folded my sleeves n started scratching angular2 only to realise they had more to mock me up when they finally said, haha, learnt angular2? now get ready for angular4..!! nd m damn sure by the tym i hv learnt angular4, they wud say, oh we r really sorry for u, we are back with angular5, 6, 7:@2
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Day 2 of my new job done. Still going over courses and doing jack shit. Today the hiring manager told me to play a game. I have to buy gifts to the girl thats in my office (lol what) and she also has to buy gifts to me in return (wtf and im still getting paid to do nothing), the company will pay for these gifts with a limited budget
Both of us had to fill out a form such as hobbies movies food drinks and if we believe in santa claus
Told this to my hot blonde gf that i have to buy gifts for another girl and she got so jealous. She literally asked me "but what do u need her for" lmao
As she should. Love seeing her jealous and mad -- but only because she disrespected me several times in the year 2023. several times caught her lying to me. Rude behavior from time to time. Always bitching and complaining with the most idiotic phrases and I'll quote "i hate how some kids younger than me are just born in a wealthy multi millionaire billionaire family and they're automatically rich and successful and dont have to do anything in life anymore while i have to struggle and work and never be successful like they are. Im so jealous of them" she keeps complaining about this majority of the time. I got really fucking annoyed. Shes stupid as fuck
And then compared to listening to that dumb shit, i met this girl, who works in the backend part, smart, beautiful, doesnt fucking bitch and complain about such obnoxious bullshit we cant control, works a 9-5 and gets her shit together. She even told me today "u dont have to buy me any of those gifts I'd be really grateful if you can just buy me some tissues for my nose cause i got a small flu haha" she even got the jokes! that was such a humble request.
Now compare that to the behavior of my spoiled blonde gf. Tf?
Im not even complaining by working a 9-5. Im actually very surprised. Everyone in the company is very nice to me and polite. Everyone is very friendly. Im getting paid even by not working shit, just sitting and watching courses to pass a devops cloud certification that the company will also pay for me
Whats going on6 -
Oh, Ubisoft
Relying on your UShit cloud saves was a terrible mistake
20 hours of AC Origins and 9 hours of Far Cry 5 lost because I trusted your piece of shit service would do something right9 -
Rule of thumb when buying things. You need to research a lot and canvass other competitors of that product/service.
In short, I forgot to research pCloud's upload speed. They throttle my upload speed to 1Mbps only which is really slow (I'm in Asia by the way, their server is in US). Got tempted by their $350 2TB lifetime.
I tested the basic upload speed using browser 33.9MB file:
- pCloud 1 min 9 sec
- Dropbox 13 sec
- Google Drive 12 sec
- Mega.Nz 1 min 56 sec
- (I will test next sync.com)
I have a 100Mbps upload and 35 Mbps download speed. So it means "Lifetime" slow upload speed.
Side Question: Which Cloud backup service do you use and why? Thanks!2 -
on a pleasant note,
Seriously, fuck myPhpAdmin. Fuck c9 and fuck MySql. My connection is solid i can do mini crap. my ajax call is good too. so idk why.
Ive spent over a week on a bug and now “occasionally working” is the best I can get and im not even sure why.
This assignment is due today.
I cant even try to do it locally cause for some reason myphpadmin and mysql dont wanna work on my laptop so yay fuck me.4 -
I had a pretty good year! I've gone from being a totally unknown passionate web dev to a respected full stack dev. This will be a bit lengthy rant...
Best:
- Got my first full time employment dev role at a company after being self-taught for 8+ years at the start of the year. Finally got someone to take the risk of hiring someone who's "untested" and only done small and odd jobs professionally. This kickstarted my career, super grateful for that!
- Started my own programming consulting company.
- Gained enough confidence to apply to other jobs, snatched a few consulting jobs, nailed the interviews even though I never practiced any leet code.
- Currently work as a 99% remote dev (only meet up in person during the initialization of some projects.) I never thought working remotely could actually work this well. I am able to stay productive and actually focus on the work instead of living up to the 9-5 standard. If I want to go for a walk to think I can do that, I can be as social and asocial as I want. I like to sleep in and work during the night with a cup of tea in the dark and it's not an issue! I really like the freedom and I feel like I've never been more productive.
- Ended up with very happy customers and now got a steady amount of jobs rolling in and contracts are being extended.
- I learned a lot, specialized in graph databases, no more db modelling hell. Loving it!
- Got a job where I can use my favorite tools and actually create something from scratch which includes a lot of different fields. I am really happy I can use all my skills and learn new things along the way, like data analysis, databricks, hadoop, data ingesting, centralised auth like promerium and centralised logging.
- I also learned how important softskills are, I've learned to understand my clients needs and how to both communicate both as a developer and an entrepeneur.
Worst:
- First job had a manager which just gave me the specifications solo project and didn't check in or meet me for 8 weeks with vague specifications. Turns out the manager was super biased on how to write code and wanted to micromanage every aspect while still being totally absent. They got mad that I had used AJAX for requests as that was a "waste of time".
- I learned the harsh reality of working as a contractor in the US from a foreign country. Worked on an "indefinite" contract, suddenly got a 2 day notification to sum up my work (not related to my performance) after being there for 7+ months.
- I really don't like the current industry standard when it comes to developing websites (I mostly work in node.js), I like working with static websites (with static website generators like what the Svelte.js driver) and use a REST API for dynamic content. When working on the backend there's a library for everything and I've wasted so many hours this year to fix bugs and create workarounds related to dependencies. You need to dive into a rabbit hole for every tool and do something which may work or break something later. I've had so many issues with CICD and deployment to the cloud. There's a library for everything but there's so many that it's impossible to learn about the edge cases of everything. Doesn't help that everything is abstracted away, which works 90% of the time but I use 15 times the time to debug things when a bug appears. I work against a black box which may or may not have an up to date documentation and it's so complex that it will require you to yell incantations from the F#$K
era and sacrifice a goat for it to work properly.
- Learned that a lot of companies call their complex services "microservices". Ah yes, the microservice with 20 endpoints which all do completely unrelated tasks? -
We’re only random people living in random places, speaking random languages, eating random food, sleeping, studying and working random hours. Traveling to random points on a sphere.
Just random range is different.
Just random stuff happens on crossroads of two random dots and the entropy speed ups or slows down.
Nothing special at all.
Just a finite state machine iteration.
I mean the amount of effort we put into explanation of infinity is outstanding.
What if there is no infinity at all ?
What if infinity is just misunderstanding of our interpretation of the world around us. It’s just pixels, resolution, gaussian splatting, quantum state, you name it.
Hey man the world is flat. Just put it to the 2d space. How many space you need from a simulation perspective where your patient eyes can only see up to certain amount of light particles per second on a shitty lens.
Propose a world optimization techniques by slowing down subject perception, tiredness introduced. Compress memory, sleep introduced. Limit neurons, cpu power assigned. Deploy on cloud - put it to life. Exit 0 body failure. Exit 1 suicide. Kill -9 killed by tty from ip EARTH.X.Y
What you can do to make the world around this planet alive? Make it blink.
We developers are lazy and I believe that nature is even more lazy than us.
You think you’re going to elevator right now ? You’re going to the preloader. Looking at the window equals playing video from playback. Never goes live, just precomputed fsm. Cars, trains, airplains ? Preloaders everywhere. Highways to split traffic to cities and communication. The road and cities planning department is a matrix maintenance department. And don’t get me started about space.
Space is empty because it’s not even finished. So they put it all behind glass called milky way. You know how glass looked 500 years ago ? It was milky so it’s milky way so we don’t see shit.
If the space would be finished I’ll be starting writing this text from mars, finished it and sent from earth but no it’s light years guys, light years is not a second for a matter. Light year is a second of the the injected thoughts exchange only. Thoughts of the global computer called generative AI that they introduced on local computing devices called cloud.
Even the preloader system is not present, they left us with the one map and overpopulated demo. What a shit hole.I bet they’re increasing temperature right now to erase this alpha build and cash out. Obviously so many bugs here that his one can’t be fixed anymore. To many viruses.
Hope for 0days to start happening so we can escape using time travel or something.
I bet they cut a budget or something, moved the team to other projects. Or even worse solar system team got layoff off because we are just neurons that ordered to do it. And now we’re stuck in some maintenance mode, no new physics no new thoughts to pursue, just slow degeneration. I would pay more for the next run and switch to other galaxy far far away where they at lest have more modern light speed technology.
What do you think about it Trinity ? Not even worth wasting your time for that. No white rabbit this time.
I do not recommend this game at this stage of early access.
- only one available map despite promises for expansions over the years no single dlc arrived,
- missing space adventures
- no galaxy travel mode only a teaser trailers of what you can do in other “universes”
- developers don’t respond to complains
- despite diversity of species and buildings at first sight world looks to generic
- instead of new features bots with mind manipulation, AB testing and data harvesting was introduced
- death anti cheat mode installed1