Used to work for a company that used asterisk for telecommunications.

Boss asked me to quickly change the call charge costs effective immediately. Finished 3diting. Went to piss. Some douche from sales came and pressed asdffggkl into the code, went down 50 lines and left it there.

Got back. Saved the code, pushed through live without testing.

Get a call three minutes later asking what the fuck did I do. There were already 450 call tickets from clients moaning they couldnt call.

So I went and checked the file I pushed. Tested it. What. Line 460 asdffggkl? What the fuck.

Removed it and boom it worked.

Got called in and said I cost the company four times my salary. Said it wasn't me, I wouldn't make a mistake like that. Told him that it was my fuck up for leaving my pc open, and that it probably was best to lock the screen.

Said I'm lying. Pulled the fucking camera footage and there was the fucker changing my code.

I got pardoned, he got a warning (just a warning). For 15 Min, I thought my ass was fired.

Will never make that naive mistake again.

Today was fucking awesome!

I always wanted to do a project in C++ since I've been more of a Java guy for years now.
And today, I finally wrote a full console program in C++! (For windows, it's a .exe)

The purpose of that program is to show if a file has a file lock on it (because of copying for example).

It started as simple as that, but got complicated quickly:
- It needs colors! So I added colors.
- Just a single file? Boring. I need wildcards, so I can put a * for anything in the file name! Jup.
- Just one directory? Boring. I need a recursive directory walk! Got it.
- But wait! There has to be an option to switch between recursive and wildcard/single mode! So I checked if the first argument equals "-r"! Hacky but works.
- Oh uh... that spams a lot now! The purpose was to show locked files, so I need another argument to specify that I only want to see locked files! Damn now it get's hard... I need a Linux-like command line argument parser (this -h and -s "hello" stuff). So I took the opportunity to write one myself! Done.
- Refactoring everything to use my new fancy parser...
- Adding more and more arguments, just because I can:
- "-d" hides "access denied" messages
- "-l" shows only locked files
- "-r" activates recursive directory walk
- "-f" formats everything nicely, basically printf("%-150.150s | %s", filename, locked); a maximum width which get's truncated if too long so everything lines up nicely
- "-h" which of course displays the help page
- "-w file" watches a file, if the file is locked it will refresh every 500ms, if it's still locked nothing happens, if it's unlocked, the program prints "unlocked" in green and exits. And yes, it does have a rotating line (something like this: "-" "\" "|" "/" "-" and so forth...)

That project was just awesome to make. I learn languages fastest if I just do a big project in them, and today, I really learned a lot.

Thank you for reading all this!

FUCK Windows File locks! I want to fucking delete a file, I don't care if anybody uses it right now! I'm the admin of this system! Fuck you windows

So this happened a few days ago. I always want to root my smartphones for that little bit more control.

*Put's new smartphone into fastboot mode*
*Tries to flash root zip onto it*
"You have to OEM unlock the bootloader first"
*OEM unlocks the bootloader*
*Tries to flash but fails*
*Tries to reboot*
Phone: "The bootloader has been tampered with, the device will boot in 5 seconds".
*Screen just hangs there for ages*
FUCK.
*Tries to enter fastboot again to OEM re-lock the bootloader*
*Fastboot appears to startup RIGHT AFTER THE FUCKING ERROR MESSAGE so can't boot into that anymore*.
FUCKING FUCK.
Hmm... TWRP is still installed...
*Tries to flash some stuff through TWRP*
"The zip file you are trying to flash is corrupt".
FUCK MY FUCKING LIFE.
*Connects phone to Linux for adb flashing*
*Nothing happens after half an hour of trying*
*Connects phone to ancient windows 7 laptop*
*Laptop doesn't even RECOGNISE the phone although all drivers are installed*.
*Le me about to completely lose my fucking mind*
*Connects phone desperately with Linux again*
*Phone is recognised right away but the SPL flash tool can't detect it*
*Tries to put it into fastboot again*
*Fails for about an hour*
*phone in charging mode again*
*Presses the power button for a last, desperate attempt*
*SPL flash suddenly recognises the phone*
FLASHING
FLASHING
FLASHING
DONE.
*Android boots again like nothing happened*

I can use it again like normal but the No-Root firewall is draining my battery like crazy.
That was one hell of a journey though!

This happened a while back but thought it would be an interesting story.

So there is this guy, I'll call him Jack. Jack was a weirdo. He just graduated high school but thought of himself as very hot in terms of dev skills. He boasted lots of good programs, that are the best in industry, except they don't work (like the best proven file compressor, that just can't decompress anything because of some "bugs"). He also entered language holy wars quite actively, saying that Delphi is the best platform ever.

Aaanyway, a couple of years pass. Jack is now a student. Jack tries to make some money, so he talks to some guy, that offers him a "job" at the tax office, where he has to modernize the data infrastructure of the tax authorities. If you think this sounds very wrong, then you're 100% correct. But it gets better. After 2 months of work, the guy manages to do that. It's a simple CRUD application after all.

So everything works, but the guy who gave him this job refused to pay. He stalled and then just stopped answering the phone. Jack is now furious. So what he does, is publish the databases online, so everyone could see the income of every citizen. Authorities are in panic. They send the police to his door. They seize his computer and lock him up for a few days.

To sum it all up: Jack took up a job, without any contract, without any NDA, which is completely illegal in of itself, but he did that with the tax authority. And delivered the product before getting paid. And when he understood that he was owned, he published all online. He got bit back. The guy who gave him this job had no consequences for illegally hiring someone and not paying for their work.

Lesson: Don't be Jack

Hello there, I'm new here and decided to post something from my short experience as a developer.

A few weeks ago I was working on the software for a Uni project (using a Raspberry Pi to create a combination lock "safe"), and as I was using one of the University's Pi's, I was writing the Python code on my laptop (because University computers don't have Sublime Text), then copying it to the uni computer and ssh into the Pi to run it.

As I had to make a few changes, I decided to use IDLE on the uni computer to do them, but when trying to run the code I couldn't see the changes made. I spent 30 minutes trying to figure out what's wrong and then I realised... I was saving the changes to the local machine, not the version of the file on the Pi.

It was a very frustrating experience..

Cracking old recovery CDs for the 9x/2000/XP era shines some light into how companies operated and when concepts came to be in that time:

Packard Bell: An EXE checks that you're running on a Packard Bell machine and reboots if it's not. How do we bypass it? Easy: just fucking delete it. The files to reinstall Windows from scratch come from...
...
C:?
Yup. Turns out Packard Bell was doing the recovery partition thing all the way back to the 9x era, maybe even further. Files aren't even on the restore disc so if your partition table got fucked (pretty common because malware and disk corruption) you were totally fucked and needed to repurchase Windows. (My dad, at the time, only charged at-cost OEM prices for a replacement retail copy. He knew it was dumb so he never sold PB machines.)

Compaq:
Computer check? Nope, remove one line from a BATCH file and it's gone.

Six archives, named "WINA.ZIP" through "WINF.ZIP" (plus one or two extras for OEM software) hold Windows. Problematic? Well... only because they never put the password anywhere so the installer can't install them. (Some interesting on-disc technician-only utils, though!)

Dell:
If not a Dell machine, lock up. Cause? CONFIG.SYS driver masquerading as OAK (the common CD driver) doing the check, then chainloading the real OAK driver. Simple fix: replace the fake driver with the real one.

Issues?

Would I mention this one if there weren't?

Disc is mounted on N:. Subdirectories work, but doing anything in them (a DIR, trying to execute something, trying to view shit in EDIT.COM) kicked you back to the disc root.

Installer couldn't find machine manifest in the MAP folder (it wanted your PC's serial before it'd let you install, to make sure you have the correct recovery disc) so it asked for 12-digit alphanumeric serial. The defined serials in the manifest were something like "02884902-01" or similar (8-2, all numbers) and it couldn't read the file so it couldn't show the right format, nor check for the right type.

Bypassing that issue, trying to do the ACTUAL install process caused nothing to happen... as all BATCHes for install think the CD should be on X:.

Welp.

well that was fun. Now to test on-real-PC behavior, as VBOX and VMWare both don't like the special hardware shit it tries to use. (Why does a textmode GUI need GPU acceleration, COMPAQ?????)

tl;dr:
The Debian 10 live disc and installer say: Heavens me, just look at the time! I’m late for my <segmentation fault

—————

tl:
The Debian 10 live cd and its new “calamares” installer are both complete crap. I’ve never had any issues with installing Debian prior to this, save with getting WiFi to work (as expected). But this version? Ugh. Here are the things I’ve run into:

Unknown root password; easy enough to get around as there is no user password; still annoying after the 10th time.

Also, the login screen doesn’t work off-disc because it won’t accept a blank password, so don’t idle or you’ll get locked out.

The lock screen is overzealous and hard-locks the computer after awhile; not even the magic kernel keys work!

The live disc doesn’t have many standard utilities, or a graphical partition editor. Thankfully I’m comfortable with fdisk.

The graphical installer (calamares) randomly segfaults, even from innocuous things like clicking [change partition] when you don’t have a partition selected. Derp.

It also randomly segfaults while writing partitions to disk — usually on the second partition.

It strangely seems less likely to segfault if the partitions are already there, even if it needs to “reformat” (recreate) them.

It also defaults to using MBR instead of GPT for the partition table, despite the tooltip telling you that MBR is deprecated and limited, and that GPT is recommended for new systems. You cannot change this without doing the partitions manually.

If you do the partitions manually and it can’t figure out where to install things, it just crashes. This is great because you can’t tell it where to install things, and specifying mount points like /boot, /, and /home don’t seem to be enough.

It also tries installing 32bit grub instead of 64bit, causing the grub installer to fail.

If you tell it to install grub on /boot, it complains when that partition isn’t encrypted — fair — but if you tell it to encrypt /boot like it wants you to, it then tries installing grub on the encrypted partition it just created, apparently without decrypting it, so that obviously fails — specific error: cannot read file system.

On the rare chance that everything else goes correctly, the install process can still segfault.

The log does include entries for errors, but doesn’t include an error message. Literally: “ERROR: Installation failed:” and the log ends. Helpful!

If the installer doesn’t segfault and the install process manages to complete, the resulting install might not even boot, even when installed without any drive encryption. Why? My guess is it never bothered to install Grub, or put it in the wrong place, or didn’t mark it as bootable, or who knows what.

Even when using the live disc that includes non-free firmware (including Ath9k) it still cannot detect my wlan card (that uses Ath9k).

I’ve attempted to install thirty plus times now, and only managed to get a working install once — where I neglected to include the Ath9k firmware.

I’m now trying the cli-only installer option instead of the live session; it seems to behave at least. I’m just terrified that the resulting install will be just as unstable as the live session.

All of this to copy the contents of my encrypted disks over so I can use them on a different system. =/

I haven’t decided which I’m going with next, but likely Arch, Void, or Gentoo. I’d go with Qubes if I had more time to experiment.

But in all seriousness, the Debian devs need some serious help. I would be embarrassed if I released this quality of hot garbage.

(This same system ran both Debian 8 and 9 flawlessly for years)

Just another big rant story full of WTFs and completely true.

The company I work for atm is like the landlord for a big german city. We build houses and flats and rent them to normal people, just that we want to be very cheap and most nearly all our tenants are jobless.
So the company hired a lot of software-dev-companies to manage everything.

The company I want to talk about is "ABI...", a 40-man big software company. ABI sold us different software, e.g. a datawarehouse for our ERP System they "invented" for 300K or the software we talk about today: a document management system. It has workflows, a 100 year-save archive system, a history feature etc.
The software itself, called ELO (you can google it if you want) is a component based software in which every company that is a "partner" can develop things into, like ABI did for our company.

Since 2013 we pay ABI 150€ / hour (most of the time it feels like 300€ / hour, because if you want something done from a dev from ABI you first have to talk to the project manager of him and of course pay him too). They did thousand of hours in all that years for my company.

In 2017 they started to talk about a module in ELO called Invoice-Module. With that you can manage all your paper invoices digital, like scan that piece of paper, then OCR it, then fill formular data, add data and at the end you can send it to the ERP system automatically and we can pay the invoice automatically. "Digitization" is the key word.

After 1.5 years of project planning and a 3 month test phase, we talked to them and decided to go live at 01.01.2019. We are talking about already ~ 200 hours planning and work just from ABI for this (do the math. No. Please dont...).

I joined my actual company in October 2018 and I should "just overview" the project a bit, I mean, hey, they planned it since 1.5 years - how bad can it be, right?

In the first week of 2019 we found 25 bugs and users reporting around 50 feature requests, around 30 of them of such high need that they can't do their daily work with the invoices like they did before without ELO.
In the first three weeks of 2019 we where around 70 bugs deep, 20 of them fixed, with nearly 70 feature requests, 5 done. Around 10 bugs where so high, that the complete system would not work any more if they dont get fixed.

Want examples?
- Delete a Invoice (right click -> delete, no super deep hiding menu), and the server crashed until someone restarts it.
- missing dropdown of tax rate, everything was 19% (in germany 99,9% of all invoices are 19%, 7% or 0%).

But the biggest thing was, that the complete webservice send to ERP wasn't even finished in the code.
So that means we had around 600 invoices to pay with nearly 300.000€ of cash in the first 3 weeks and we couldn't even pay 1 cent - as a urban company!

Shortly after receiving and starting to discussing this high prio request with ABI the project manager of my assigned dev told me he will be gone the next day. He is getting married. And honeymoon. 1 Week. So: Wish him luck, when will his replacement here?

Deep breath.
Deep breath.

There was no replacement. They just had 1 developer. As a 40-people-software-house they had exactly one developer which knows ELO, which they sold to A LOT of companies.

He came back, 1 week gone, we asked for a meeting, they told us "oh, he is now in other ELO projects planned, we can offer you time from him in 4 weeks earliest".

To cut a long story short (it's to late for that, right?) we fought around 3 month with ABI to even rescue this project in any thinkable way. The solution mid February was, that I (software dev) would visit crash courses in ELO to be the second developer ABI didnt had, even without working for ABI....

Now its may and we decided to cut strings with ABI in ELO and switch to a new company who knows ELO. There where around 10 meetings on CEO-level to make this a "good" cut and not a bad cut, because we can't afford to scare them (think about the 300K tool they sold us...).

01.06.2019 we should start with the new company. 2 days before I found out, by accident, that there was a password on the project file on the server for one of the ELO services. I called my boss and my CEO. No one knows anything about it. I found out, that ABI sneaked into this folder, while working on another thing a week ago, and set this password to lock us out. OF OUR OWN FCKING FILE.
Without this password we are not able to fix any bug, develop any feature or even change an image within ELO, regardless, that we paid thausend of hours for that.

When we asked ABI about this, his CEO told us, it is "their property" and they will not remove it.
When I asked my CEO about it, they told me to do nothing, we can't scare them, we need them for the 300K tool.

No punt.
No finish.

Just the project file with a password still there today

Siemens Step7 code block protection (PLC's).. It was designed to lock code that you don't want others to be able to read. All blocks are in a dbf file, so you just need to find the block record and uncomment one line, voila - source code available.

Given the massive use of Siemens PLC's on plants all over the world, and the simplicity of hacking via S7 protocol, usually Internet connected, it's a breeze to steal or modify the controllers code with possible critical implications.

Enter Stuxnet.

Anything I (am able to) build myself.
Also, things that are reasonably standardized. So you probably won't see me using a commercial NAS (needing a web browser to navigate and up-/download my files, say what?) nor would I use something like Mega, despite being encrypted. I don't like lock-in into certain clients to speak some proprietary "secure protocol". Same reason why I don't use ProtonMail or that other one.. Tutanota. As a service, use the standards that already exist, implement those well and then come offer it to me.

But yeah. Self-hosted DNS, email (modified iRedMail), Samba file server, a blog where I have unlimited editing capabilities (God I miss that feature here on devRant), ... Don't trust the machines nor the services you don't truly own, or at least make an informed decision about them. That is not to say that any compute task should be kept local such as search engines or AI or whatever that's best suited for centralized use.. but ideally, I do most of my computing locally, in a standardized way, and in a way that I completely control. Most commercial cloud services unfortunately do not offer that.

Edit: Except mail servers. Fuck mail servers. Nastiest things I've ever built, to the point where I'd argue that it was wrong to ever make email in the first place. Such a broken clusterfuck of protocols, add-ons (SPF, DKIM, DMARC etc), reputation to maintain... Fuck mail servers. Bloody soulsuckers those are. If you don't do system administration for a living, by all means do use the likes of ProtonMail and Tutanota, their security features are nonstandard but at least they (claim to) actually respect your privacy.

Fuck Unity.
Every single time I try to use Unity to develop my well-along-in-development video game, it finds some way of fucking itself up.
Be it from somehow failing to compile a DLL - which is something completely out of my control, the inspector failing to update itself when I select a new object every five minutes, to the engine managing to fail to load its UI layout because it somehow managed to lose a file responsible for containing the layout, the Inspector forgetting to include a scrollbar and as such trying to cram a bunch of components into one area, crashing in a certain area because I tried using reflections, crashing because I tried running the game in a place that always works, all the way to the whole thing closing instantaneously when I try selecting a new layout.
My experience with using this god-forsaken configuration of code and imagery has been one of endless torment; I've spent hours lamenting about the pain this piece of utter horseshit has caused me to those who'd listen.
I don't know what I did to this thing to deserve to be shown the absolute worst of this engine for the year I've been working on my game for. I can't even take a look at its source code to see if I can piece together things I'll pick up from alien code to fix obnoxious bugs myself because you cunts have it under lock-and-key for some dumbass reason.
Even updating my install of this engine is a gamble; I remember clear-as-day updating my project from 2019.3.14 to whichever one was most recent at the time, and everything breaking. This time, I got lucky and managed to update to 2020.1.4 with no issue on the surface, except I inadvertently let in a host of other issues that somehow made the editor worse than the older one.
There's little point in even bothering to report a bug because this shit happens so randomly that I could be just working on auto-pilot and the next thing I know Unity's stupid "crash handler" rears its ugly head yet again, or you people are probably too busy adding support for platforms no sane person uses like fucking Chromebooks.
There've been times where it's crashed upwards of three times in the span of 40 minutes of light use.
How is one expected to cough up hundreds of dollars a year to use a "pro" version of this horrid editor when every session of use yields a 50/50 chance that it'll either work like it's supposed to, or break in one way or another?
It's a miracle I even managed to type all of this out in one go, I expected the website to just stop responding entirely once I got past four lines.
Do what you will with my post, I don't care.

Mgr: composer require. That's all you're allowed to do. I want you to manually go through our word press site, check which ones need an update. And do a composer require in the command line for each to update them.

Me: wouldn't it make more sense to just increment the version in the composer.json and then run update?

Mgr: no, you don't understand how composer works, it's very complicated. Just do require. Don't ever do update.

Me: *does it anyway (reverting later of course) and compares update vs require and their differences in the lock file*

I mean it looks like 'update' is updating important dependencies for each of the packages as well as the package itself... The 'require' just seems to download the package itself but no updates to dependencies for those packages.

But seriously is composer that complicated that I can't just do an 'update'?

I've been reading the composer documentation and it seems to be saying that update is the better way to go...

I'm doubting myself these days...

When I was in 11th class, my school got a new setup for the school PCs. Instead of just resetting them every time they are shut down (to a state in which it contained a virus, great) and having shared files on a network drive (where everyone could delete anything), they used iServ. Apparently many schools started using that around that time, I heard many bad things about it, not only from my school.
Since school is sh*t and I had nothing better to do in computer class (they never taught us anything new anyway), I experimented with it. My main target was the storage limit. Logins on the school PCs were made with domain accounts, which also logged you in with the iServ account, then the user folder was synchronised with the iServ server. The storage limit there was given as 200MB or something of that order. To have some dummy files, I downloaded every program from portableapps.com, that was an easy way to get a lot of data without much manual effort. Then I copied that folder, which was located on the desktop, and pasted it onto the desktop. Then I took all of that and duplicated it again. And again and again and again... I watched the amount increate, 170MB, 180, 190, 200, I got a mail saying that my storage is full, 210, 220, 230, ... It just kept filling up with absolutely zero consequences.
At some point I started using the web interface to copy the files, which had even more interesting side effects: Apparently, while the server was copying huge amounts of files to itself, nobody in the entire iServ system could log in, neither on the web interface, nor on the PCs. But I didn't notice that at first, I thought just my account was busy and of course I didn't expect it to be this badly programmed that a single copy operation could lock the entire system. I was told later, but at that point the headmaster had already called in someone from the actual police, because they thought I had hacked into whatever. He basically said "don't do again pls" and left again. In the meantime, a teacher had told me to delete the files until a certain date, but he locked my account way earlier so that I couldn't even do it.
Btw, I now own a Minecraft account of which I can never change the security questions or reset the password, because the mail address doesn't exist anymore and I have no more contact to the person who gave it to me. I got that account as a price because I made the best program in a project week about Java, which greatly showed how much the computer classes helped the students learn programming: Of the ~20 students, only one other person actually had a program at the end of the challenge and it was something like hello world. I had translated a TI Basic program for approximating fractions from decimal numbers to Java.
The big irony about sending the police to me as the 1337_h4x0r: A classmate actually tried to hack into the server. He even managed to make it send a mail from someone else's account, as far as I know. And he found a way to put a file into any account, which he shortly considered to use to put a shutdown command into autostart. But of course, I must be the great hacker.

Couldn't save a file because it showed me that this file is opened somewhere else. So I go to the resource monitor to check for its handlers, but only explorer.exe showed in list. I restart explorer and get back to the code. For the first time..... for the first time in my life I hoped that this won't work. I press Ctrl+S, andddd, file was saved.

So, basically, windows's explorer can lock files. Nice job Microsoft. Nice job.

Am I the only developer in existence who's ever dealt with Git on Windows? What a colossal train wreck.

1. Authentication. Since there is no ssh key/git url support on Windows, you have to retype your git credentials Every Stinking Time you push. I thought Git Credential Manager was supposed to save your credentials? And this was impossible over SSH (see below). The previous developer had used an http git URL with his username and password baked in for authentication. I thought that was a horrific idea so I eventually figured out how to use a Bitbucket App password.

2. Permissions errors
In order to commit and push updates, I have to run Git for Windows as Administrator.

3. No SSH for easy git access
Here's where I confess that this is a Windows Server machine running as some form of production. Please don't slaughter me! I am not the server admin.
So, I convinced the server guy to find and install some sort of ssh service for Windows just for the off times we have to make a hot fix in production. (Don't ask, but more common than it should be.)
Sadly, this ssh access is totally useless as the git colors are all messed up, the line wrap length and window size are just weird (seems about 60 characters wide by 25 lines tall) and worse of all I can't commit/push in git via ssh because Permissions. Extremely aggravating.

4. Git on Windows hangs open and locks the index file
Finally, we manage to have Git for Windows hang quite frequently and lock the git index file, meaning that we can't do anything in git (commit, push, pull) without manually quitting these processes from task manager, then browsing to the directory and deleting the .git/index.lock file.

Putting this all together, here's the process for a pull on this production server:
Launch a VNC session to the server. Close multiple popups from different services. Ask Windows to please not "restart to install updates". Launch git for Windows. Run a git pull. If the commits to be pulled involve deleting files, the pull will fail with a permissions error. Realize you forgot to launch as Administrator. Depending on how many files were deleted in the last update, you may need to quit the application and force close the process rather than answer "n" for every "would you like to try again?" file. Relaunch Git as Administrator. Run Git pull. Finally everything works.

At this point, I'd be grateful for any tips, appreciate any sympathy, and understand any hatred. Windows Server is bad. Git on Windows is bad.

When four issues get assigned to four different developers and the analysis and the proposed fix for each is a change to a single class file that has been locked by a fifth developer.

Vendor lock-in for cloud providers is really small, and you don't notice it until you need it. Route53 has an "import zone file" button, but they don't have an "export zone file" button. Yes, there are other tools and scripts to do it, but bit-by-bit AWS, GCP, and Azure make it difficult to leave.

I'm currently between jobs and have a few rants about my previous job (naturally). In retrospect, it's somewhat therapeutic to range about the sheer brainfuckery that has taken place. Enjoy!

First, let me set the scene: legacy B2B web app made with LEMP stack and sencha ext.js 3 + 4 (don't ask) and a lot of madness. Let's call that app "Alpha".

Alpha is a self made CMS build for typical ERP stuff. Yes, a self made CMS: entities are containers, containers have types and fields and values. Like so many legacy PHP apps, it does not have a dedicated FE: the HTML is rendered on the server and then spewed out to the browser.

Easy right? Coding like it's 1999! But there was a twist: Because everything is basically a container, the HTML-templates are saved in the DB. Along with the nessary JS and the CSS. And the translation variables. Why? Because fuck you! That's why. Who needs a git history anyways.

For some reason, Alpha was kinda slow.

There was also an editor, that allowed you to modify templates (web, mail, pdf) on the fly in prod. Because templates contain repeating data (header/footer), one template could contain additional templates. Much confusion. You could change templates via migration (slow, boring) or just ctrl-c/ctrl-v that sucker (fast, much excitement).

Did I mention Alpha was slow?

On with the rant: e-mails! How do they work? Noone knows. How to send mails asynchronous in PHP? Witchcraft is the only possible answer to that riddle. Here is your enterprise™ solution:
1. create mail
2. insert mail into DB
3. WAIT UP TO 59 SECONDS FOR A FUCKING CRON TO SEND MAIL

Why? "Because that way, we can resend mails in case the network is down :)"

Same procedure for the SOAP-API (db-queue + cron). You read that right: all requests to various other systems are processed once a minute.

Alpha slow.

Alpha was only one of several systems. Imagine a bunch of monolithic php apps, interconnected via SOAP, REST and GraphQL like a godamn intergalactic orgy. Image having to debug that cluster fuck.

Let's say there is a bad request. These things happen. No biggie. Remember the db-queue? Let's try to send the bad request a second time! And a third time! Still no luck? How odd. Let's create a specific file in a specific directory: a LOCK-file. Now, "the db-queue is on hold and no request gets processed :)"

Golly gee thanks Alpha.

Anyhow, did you know that MySQL has a join limit of 61 tables?

Existing code:
Logger class would block the caller, lock a mutex, call CreateFile(), write a single line to the file, unlock the mutex and return.

Improvement:
Added two logging queues and created a thread that will periodically lock one queue and write it to the disk, around 500 entries at a time, while new entries are being inserted into the other queue. Kinda like a bed pan or urine bottle. While emptying one bottle, the logs go into the other one. Added fatal exception handlers so that the log queues are dumped when the application is crashing. When the exception handler is triggered, logging method does not return so that the application STOPS working to make sure there are no "not logged" activities.

One day I helped another teacher with setting up his backend with the currently running Nginx reverse-proxy, peace of cake right?

Then I found out the only person with ssh access was not available, OK then just reset the root password and we're ready to go.

After going through that we vim'd into authorized_keys with the web cli, added his pub key and tried to ssh, no luck. While verifying the key we found out that the web cli had not parsed the key properly and basically fucked up the file entirely.

After some back and forth and trying everything we became grumpy, different browsers didn't help either and even caps lock was inverted for some reason. Eventually I executed plan B and vim'd into the ssh daemon's settings to enable root login and activate password authentication. After all that we could finally use ssh to setup the server.

What an adventure that was 😅

Without a doubt it has to be the internal company search engine/file finding tool @thewamz and I wrote.

The company has a wide UNC network with files scattered all over the place and they need a way to keep track of where the files get moved to (they can and do get moved). The original tool was written in Java/Tomcat and didn't use any frameworks or utilities beyond custom written ones, no orms, and the SQL was just raw strings. The program didn't take into account that files might be moved or deleted so it never removed anything from the database, it just kept adding files and never removing them.

It however never stores files itself, just links to files elsewhere on the UNC network.

It took six months to get it into what might be a stable beta or release candidate state. The user interface is good, very simple and intuitive, the whole thing was rewritten in python/django, there were issues with utf 8 (and mysql not fully supporting utf 8 in its own utf 8 mode), we added a regex search mode (which was sorely lacking), the search used to take up to fifteen minutes however we sped it up to less than a minute (worst case when a user simply puts "^$" as the regex search). It has a multi threaded design which does some checks to ensure it doesn't spawn too many threads and get stuck in constant Gil switching. Still some bugs to fix, like moving the processing of results returned by the server in a web worker so that the content widget doesn't lock up processing millions of search results and moving the back end to use asynchronous python might gain a performance boost. But on the whole I think the system is ready to replace the older system that all the users are frustrated with and constantly complain about.

However the annoying bit is... How to actually get the new system online, while I am responsible for the development of tools and their maintenance, I am not responsible for their initial deployment and that means I have no idea when (or even if) my new tool will even ever be released :/

IF YOU WANT MULTIPLE COMPOSER FILES PER ENVIRONMENT AND NO LOCK FILE YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW COMPOSER WORKS!

I had a discussion about SAAS and microtransactions with another dev. They are a little bit younger than me. The trend toward this in games and android apps were discussed. We found that we both avoid software which employs these business models.

We cannot be the only 2 people who avoid products employing these common business models. So I wonder what demographic pays for these services and products? I am to the point that if my kid asks to buy something in a game, I tell them that we will get rid of the game if they keep asking.

The only time I have paid for SAAS is when there is extraordinary perceived value. Quickbooks for small business is one such product (way cheaper than an accountant). Another is the Xbox game pass. So apparently for the game pass I am in the demographic.

Do we not like it because it is new? Or is it a kind of sleazy business tactic? I dunno. I would rather pay up front for most things. I feel like SAAS will be employed in software with proprietary file formats which require a subscription to even get to your data. Vendor lock-in.

think I'm starting to get why the c/c++ people are all crazy

I wanted to upgrade something so I wrote it then had to plug in the new version in 7 different crates. cool well after dozens of different file changes I found like 3 bugs and figured hey ok maybe some small edge case bug fixes and now I'm just frustrated because nothing is working and also did I mention I have like 3 deprecated crates but I haven't had a moment to rest to deprecate them fully and remove them and it's all massively annoying me

I keep just rewriting things because it's easier than changing the static typing system everywhere, but no matter what I do I just end up in more changing of the static typing system, repeat

I think I might just end at a non working codebase and lock myself up for 3 days and take some drugs and see what happens until either I pass out from lack of sleep and wake up not caring, someone finds me and takes me away, or I finally have a working product

things can't be done in chunks I guess

cuz if it works in isolation then you stress test it and it works then you plug it into the live system and heyyo look it doesn't because you didn't stress test these edge cases enough and now everything is broken and who wants to revert like 2 hours of stupid secretary work because StATiC TyPe SysTeM. so what my stress tests need to be the live system? and speaking of tests I keep have to go back to older tests and keep updating them every time the damned static type system updates so I don't want more tests

the irony in all this is suddenly for once in my life I had this funny thought of "whoa, remember when people said coding wasn't for them?". I mean if I keep shooting myself in the foot does end up feeling like a me problem. I still think like a damned computer though. literally the thing i've always been best at so I'm just laughing at the ridiculousness

(maybe it's the brain damage, let's be fair to myself)

wanted to watch a horror movie with the bf for a few days and the guy is a narcoleptic. told him I wanted to today but now look at me, I wanna lock myself in a room until I solve my disaster so how am I supposed to enjoy a movie, and do I just ditch what I'm doing and hope I give a shit later or do I blow him off? fuuuuck why

When I was on my first internship, I started developing an Android app, while my friend developed a C# program that read a .txt with info and references from a mail service (in my country it's CTT).

The damn .txt files got really really big, na she had to display all of the data in a listbox (it was a PoC) and when he pressed the item, it had to fill some fields at the left of the listbox.

Needless to say, he didn't learn of multi-threading yet, and I had, so I taught him how to multithread so the app wouldn't lock up while loading the massive .txt file.

The listbox filling made a cool animation (like CMD executing commands from a bat file) and we even implemented a progressbar.

I felt like a badass Dev after that.

Experience with Plasma Mobile, part 2.

I was able to clone the official master repository and commit my hacks to it, but when I sent the pull request, the current active maintainer said that the master branch was actually severely out of date and to try the "halium-flash" branch.

So I did. I checked out the "halium-flash" branch and attempted to install Plasma Mobile. The bash file used to flash the phone still needed to be hacked around, though my previous commit was made irrelevant by the change. However, I did get it working on my phone.

So, here are my thoughts: It's most definitely not ready. The lock screen looks pretty and is well put together, and the "desktop" and icons for applications look very nice.

However, my phone does not have a physical "home" button, and Plasma Mobile to date does not have a digital "home" button. So, in order to close an application I have to literally reboot my phone.

As of yet there seems to not be any tactile feedback or visual feedback, which is odd when typing in the passcode to log into Plasma Mobile or trying to open an application.

Firefox crashes if you try to open it, and currently there are two choices of wallpaper. I haven't tried calling someone, but I'm fairly certain that Plasma Mobile does not support telephony on my phone type.

So, my verdict is still the same: I have great hopes for the Plasma Mobile project, but unless you are a developer who is interested in making it a better product, I would stay away for now.

Three days ago:
Found my eOS had crashed. Got on my dad's spare Dell Latitude (by God, the keyboard is awesome) and downloaded an image file for Ubuntu.

Fast Forward to today morning :
Apparently, my dad never did down either of his laptops, or even lock. The Latitude had a update but it then started reverting it. It went into a loop.

My dad: what did you do?! It was working perfectly before, you must have crashed it.

What the fuck dad... Thankfully, he got it up and running later.

Has anyone ever tried to export a table in SAP HANA to csv format? Unfortunately, we are not allowed to access our SAP HANA environment directly from our development laptop (the SAP environment is a production environment, of course we don't have a develop or test environment nor does anyone feel the need to create one), so we need to email ourselves a csv file with the data we need to develop our models in python (I'm not kidding).

Anyhow, among other things, I need to manually add column names in the file, some columns are quoted, some are not, I cannot choose my delimiter, ...

Is this vendor lock-in the year 2023?

I just finally took time to look at creating symbolic links for node modules and package and package lock json files all from a boilerplate code for my frontend projects,

I saved over 15gb of disk space,

my SSD is 40gb so that's fair

now I have all my node modules for frontend projects in a separate container and node modules for backend projects in a separate container

I still havent figured out how to trim down my package.json file before pushing because there'll be some unused libraries.

for now any direct changes I make to the package and package lock json files will be reflected in the the symlinked directory and them reflect over all projects that share it

I have to be careful here

Consider an API that uses the HTTP path to represent position in a tree that literally represents a file tree with minimal constraints, and GET/PUT/DELETE methods to read, write and destroy the nodes. How would you encode read/write operations to per-node metadata? The kinds of metadata are static and around 4, so inventing HTTP verbs for each of them is infeasible but filtering is not necessary.

Options considered so far:
- toplevel resources alongside a namespaced /data such as /acl, /lock
- magic keywords to the Range header (this is apparently compliant)
- mimetypes such as text/plain+acl
- SETPROP / PROP methods in the spirit of WebDAV
- headers (I worry this may become an immitigable bottleneck really fast)

I'm looking for any kind of suggestion or insight, not perfect answers.

I read the WebDAV specification and I won't even suggest that I'm trying to align with it, the only protocol I'd seen in the past with comparable scope bloat is WebRTC.

Not only does every app need to have an export option, but new exports must create new, time-stamped files rather than overwriting an existing export!

A counter-example is "Battery Monitor Widget" by CCC71 or 3C71. That app creates a file in the main user directory, named "bmw_history.txt" (no relation to the car manufacturer).

When a new export is created, the existing bmw_history.txt is overwritten. This could lead to data loss if the user is unaware of this behaviour.

The developer thought of creating an export ability, but messed up at the file naming process.

Mandatory time-stamped user data exports for every app would not be so bad. This makes sure no developer would forget about it. GDPR gave us data portability for social media platforms. Let's do it for apps too. (Sorry, Samsung Internet, you can no longer lock in saved pages. Your users are sick of it.)

I don't always forget to turn off caps lock,
but when I do, it's in VIM AND WIPE OUT HALF THE FILE

you know I love you VIM

So after deploying an update for my apps api this morning, I very quickly had to move hosts as openahift for some reason does not install express on its 8.x container, heck its not even in the package lock file, and no help from Google. On the plus side, new ones faster, even though it's further away, and I can only image a replica set DB is better than a single instance.

Does anyone know how i can check if a file has a SVN lock using C#?

I got 2 chromebook 11 3180 and 3100 and got home turned them on and what do know the fuck administrative lock 🔐..... I try everything on them I can't get them unlock or bypass administrative privileges...... developer mode is blocked and yeah, and what make matters worse the school they from don't have them on file .......... I don't no what to do ......anyone else have any clue how to get them open?

Can someone explain me how installing a lightdm greeter (web-greeter) can completely break gtk+ themes and elementary-tweaks. How is that even related to each other and why does my fucking lock screen still look like crap? Seriously, I spent the whole day trying to fix my desktop environment and now it turns out that removing a lightdm config file fixes gtk themes on my desktop. How on earth is a fucking lightdm config file related to my desktop environment's ability to load gtk+ themes. It doesn't make sense. I should really stop messing around with things...