- "Have you ever used breakpoints?"
- "Umm.."
- "You ever saw a breakpoint?"
- "You mean like... "break;"?"
...

You know, I am getting really fucking irate posting them rants about how shitty my job is.

I'm more than fucking competant, but this company is turning me into a blithering, raging, frothing maniac.

I am sitting doing my devOps at the moment. On top of that I am the network admin, the sys admin, the sec admin, the fucking fuck admin (you get the point) and now I am being told to go out and work in the field because "The technician is busy with calls, and doesn't have time". These calls are ALL FUCKING PRINTER CALLS. SET UP USERS TO PRINT AND FUCKING SCAN.

I am not being a shithead by saying no. I have spent the last year or so doing favours for these bastards, I don't get any compensation in any form for it, and it is just making my life hell. The reason I went into devOps is so that I don't have to fucking deal with shit like this. I spent years in the field, and I fucking hated it. I was good at what I did, but I fucking hated it.

Now I am back there. They earn more than i do, those printer techs, but I am doing their fucking work for them. I have even made them simple little fucking scripts so that 90% of their work is done in two clicks.

Fucksakes. Now my motherfucking right shift key doesn't want to operate properly. Been using this keyboard for about 6 years now, and now it decides to fuck out. Fuck.

As standing, I am fucking sick and fucking tired. I am drinking energy drinks and mass amounts of coffee just to stay functional (because I sit up until 12AM trying to get through all my work - everyday of the week). Reported to tech director, doesnt give a single fuck. "Stick around, things will get better".

Yeah, fuck you.

Seriously thinking about freelancing.

Don't know if it pays well though.

Found this in a code base I just started to work with. I'm glad it wasn't referenced anywhere. This is going to be fun...

6 =< x >= 5000

Got a corporate profile pic
Filled out my Linkedin profile
Checked that I'm open for work opportunities
3 months later an HR wrote to me about a nice job opportunity
"Hey, guys, I need more $$$, I'm going to other company"
And here I am, doing even less than at previous job, but get paid 2x more XD

I just read a rant about Java by a guy who moved from JS/python.
FFS, until now you were using some aberration of OOP by creating "objects" and making them however you want instead of sticking to concept of blueprinting and managing your classes in a way shit happens properly.
Yes, I do hate js/python-like langs if I would have to do something big in them, because I need to constraint my program so it works predictably every time. I don't feel like I'm doing that by putting some arbitrary key-value pairs into some random object :v
Java and her sexier sister Kotlin ftw and nothing gonna change my mind <3

In the pandemic era i have become allergic to delivery fees. Fucking $5 to get pizza delivered? Fuck you I'll take the 15 minutes it takes to go down to the damn restaurant! Pisses me off sometimes.

Maybe it's because i enjoy getting out more since I've started working from home, but tbh i don't even care, because paying $11 to have someone else bring your groceries to you just makes me irate.

Gotta love android.

int a;
//do stuff
textView.setText(a);
....
ResourceNotFoundException

*get task assigned to me*

*complete task*

*get new task changing everything I did in the previous task*

Me: "Why is this getting completely changed? It meets the specs you sent."

PM: "Well, they took a while to approve the concept so I assumed it would be the same as the one on their current site. But now they want something different. Just change it."

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK IS THE POINT OF SENDING FOR APPROVAL IF YOU ARE NOT GOING TO WAIT FOR THE APPROVAL?!

*In competitive coding*
My code has an error
Me : *doesn't have a clue*

My code gets executed
Me : *doesn't have a clue*
XD

32 bit operating system

Compass readings on Android phone might get messed up when iPhone gets close to it.

I have azimuth showing in my app, we wanted to check if it's working and we put an Android phone on the table and iPhone with compass app running. Android showed 20 degrees less. Colleague picked up iPhone and azimuth on Android changed by 20 degrees :D

Non english-native devs - when you work with foreign customers, do they insist on using your name as it is pronounced in your country, or do they prefer to use English substitutes?

I mean - I'm from Poland. We have a call with a guy from France and he goes on and calls everyone as it is in Polish, but sometimes I know it would be easier for him to go for English names (we can translate them easily, no one would be offended, I guess)

Is it the case in your work? :v

Unpopular opinion:

Coding on paper exams actually do help at beginner stages of learning to code.
It makes you at least think how to write things simply, without overthinking the problem, makes you familiar with semicolons (so all you stupid fks wont complain that it has taken you 2 hours to find missing semicolon (actually, who has ever encountered that problem, besides memes?)), makes you learn the syntax, just many benefits that spoiled OOP/FP starting kids cant see, because they relied on autocomplete so much.
God, I hate people who are trying to render things stupid just because they can't see the fking point -.-'
Losing my mind about who goes into "programming" and who calls himself "developer" is just fueled by that.

This is my first rant, so here it goes:

Working with a functional SME who's "too busy" for end to end testing and, this is a direct quote, "I'm confident that the technical team can fix anything which inadvertanly gets broken by configuration/process changes". Then when the inevitable happens and he breaks something, he refers the irate users to my team. I really hate this guy.
Thanks for listening, fellow Ranters.

"So, there is one project that requires update"...

When I hear the word "service" I think of something that just runs in background and you can do stuff with it. I have no idea how to create one, I almost had to make one on Android and use it properly, now I'm back to Windows and Java and we have something working as a service, I have no idea how it was created and how it does work, I just know how to start, restart and stop it. If you asked me how it works and how to communicate with it - XD no idea lol but let me google that. I have almost 4 years of professional software development experience.

And at this point I'm too afraid to ask ;____;

This b2plane guy is really something

I mean I felt dumb and insecure about my job and now I don't :v

!rant but
How many of you know about Packtpub and its free learning program?
Everyday you get a nice ebook on programming :)

#magento
Idk who's developing that, but that's what occured to me:
Request for getting specific category in shop:
V1/categories/{category_id}
Request for getting categories list:
V1/categories/list
....?
"Invalid type for value: "list". Expected Type: "int""
I wonder fucking why -.-'

!rant, but funny
tl;dr I made something that was to protect me in case the customer doesn't pay, wanted to check if it's still there, messed up a little :D
>do an Android app project for almost 6 months
>issues with payment for it
> =.=
>firebase
>"Add new application"
>Remote Config
>add single integer variable
>back to app code
>if (integerFromFirebase != 0) navigateTo(new Fragment())
>mwahahahaha
>but they ended up paying me in the end
>huh...
>see another post on how to secure yourself if customer doesn't want to pay
>well, consider yours as more sophisticated
>hmm... wonder if they removed it
>firebaseconsole.exe
>change "enableJavaScript" (needed a legit name, so it can't be easily backtracked) to 1
>publish changes
>app still works fine
>mhhh... they removed it? really?
>can't fking believe it
>apkpure.com
>search for the app
>download apk
>unzip
>decompile dex file
>find the fragment
>can't find the code that navigates to blank fragment, but the config fetch is still there
>wtf
>look at the app
>restart it
>SHIT ITS NOT WORKING NOW XDDDDD
>changed the variable back to 0
>found out that the lambda in which I navigate to the blank fragment is in other .java file. New thing learned :v
>idk if I'm in trouble but I highly doubt it (console shows max 10 active users atm)

Was fun tho :v

Trying to improve my console experience with Windows, I had antergos with Sindragosa in background and blue console font before, now it's time for Doomguy + yellow font and I like it :P

Time for an actual rant.

3rd year of CS.
We have Mobile Systems course - Android & iOS development.
Lectures - 1hr of interview with Steve Jobs about greatness of iOS.
Practice - So far we had to write 2 android apps.
Seems wrong? No, it's perfectly fine for "Course Leader" (idk how the guy is called properly in English)
First app - 3 screens (it was forced to do it with Activities), data passing between activities, lifecycles
Second app - 2 screens - one with ListView (well, I asked about RecyclerView, luckily I was allowed), another one adds elements to that List plus Snackbars, Notifications, list item selection and removing them (I ended up adding retrolambda and streams to write it anyhow). We were asked to do it on Activities, I thought it was an overkill, in the end did it on Fragments.
What pisses me off - we were asked to do those two apps after watching one hour of interview, the guy who leads the practical part of course has no idea how to do things in Android (said it clearly), I was, and still am, only one who knows how to do anything.
I work as Android dev, so I want to help my colleagues. Decided to make tutorial streams where I explain how to do everything.
Troll colleagues come and dislike it on youtube, post lulzy comments into chat. Not that it bothers me much, but still, people who I'm trying to help are mixing my help with shit, great :)
If Polish devranters want to check out those streams (you can write a decent app after watching those 4 hours) I can post them in comment.

Once I was looking for a monospace comic sans just for shits and giggles.

Now if I know that I would be using Android Studio for longer on a machine, then I have to look for Fantasque Sans Mono, I can't work otherwise :v

(ChroMATERIAL is also a pretty cool color scheme)
(And did you know, there is a Nyan Cat progress bars plugin?)

When you get annoyed with the code completion and symbol completion on your IDE ! Anyone ?

Bugs are MTDs - Mergually Transmitted Diseases

Quick poll for .Net people. JetBrains ReSharper is:

A. Vital for getting anything done.
B. The work of Satan. Avoid at all costs.
C. Used to be (A) but VS2015 makes it redundant.
D. I've never used it.
E. I have used it, but I have no strong opinion about it one way or the other.

(If you say E, you're far too placid to be a programmer and you should practice getting more irate about other people's software choices ;)

!rant
Got amazed by last Doom, especially with the music, Mick is absolute genius.
Yesterday I ended up trying to beat '93 version at 11 pm despite I had to get up at 6 am because I'm getting ready for a trip ^^
btw. Doomsday engine pretty cool.