This is Alvin, a small sub that is 60 years old, been to the Titanic wreckage many, many times. Still in active service.

This is the difference between the real engineering and the kind of "engineering" done by so-called "disruptors" that say "move fast and break things".

You're not an engineer — you're a douche that appropriates the engineering culture. You didn't make an "OS for productivity", you made a worse version of Lotus 1-2-3 from 1983. You didn't "reverse-engineer" anything — you copied and pasted funny letters and symbols put together by a language model that is as clueless as you are.

Do not cite the deep magic to me, bitch. I was there when it was written.

This question asked about these.

Unofficial slogans for programming languages:

Javascript - JustShitting out frameworks every week.

Python - Shit programmers become slightly less shit and call themselves "data scientists" here.

C# - We know we are better than you, and even though we don't need to say it, we will say it anyway.

Pascal - The only recognized version of Pascal is from one single vendor.

Haskell - Stay is school if you want to use this professionally.

Swift - (honestly don't know what to say here, Lensflare can fill in on this one.) Maybe this: The first rule of Swift club is we don't talk about Apple club.

Java/Kotlin - We are in everything, including your mom's vibrator.

C - The rest of the programming world doesn't exist. Especially in embedded. Happily using K & R compilers for 3 decades.

C++ - We will pretend to care about the rest of the programming world, but like C, we will do whatever the fuck we want. or, Being held back by the ABI for at least a decade.

Rust - I feel bad for you for using other programming languages.

These are probably highly inaccurate, mostly just wanted to talk about Java being in your mom's sex toy.

There are 49million kangaroos in Australia and 3.5million people in Uruguay which means if the kangaroos were to invade Uruguay, each person will have to fight 14 kangaroos

Ooooof. So I was booked off sick by my doctor not too long ago for a week and when I got back, I seem to have been removed as project lead with zero communication about this.

Talk about a fucking professional sabotage situation...

Glad I'm leaving as soon as I get a job offer.

Natalie Rupnow, the Wisconsin school shooter, looks EXACTLY like jestdotty. Before posting her "manifesto" which was a google doc, she forgot to make the link public, so no one actually read it -- intelligence level checks out too!

The latest and greatest bullshit at the workplace: when you're asked to be an 'ambassador'. This really just translates to: 'take on more work for free'.

Whenever management approaches you with 'honorable extra role', immediately ask how it's compensated and definitely don't do it for no extra benefits (a raise should be default).

Don't fall into the trap.

devRanters, are you still here?

Since, sadly, it's not possible to post images anymore and the founders unfortunately aren't addressing the issue (unless I missed something, let me know), I'm thinking about implementing an integrated external image uploader in devRant UWP client (if you don't know, I made a client for devRant in 2016 you can still download from the Microsoft Store on Windows 10/11), integrated as link for official clients, loaded as image in my client.
It won't resolve the issue on mobile (other than seeing the link to the image), unless you're using a Windows Phone in 2025!, but at least you could potentially see images on Windows (for rants posted using my client).

Let me know what do you think. If there are any devRant UWP users still here... lol

Phone broke, screen fell off 😣 Now I can't download devRant on my new phone 😅 There's a community Android client, right? What's the name and where do I find it?

I haven't coded in so long I'm actually starting to miss it

Had my wisdom teeth removed today. Not feeling my entire jaw is a bit strange but I don't believe I had any other strange effects from the sedation and I've been assured that I didn't say anything embarrassing.

Not having those teeth there anymore feels weird. They grew in well, but one developed a cavity that was causing me a headache that has been getting worse for the last 6 weeks.

Sometimes, Google's solutions are worse than the problem they intend to solve.

For example, Google ReCaptchas are worse than spam, especially those with the pictures that fade extremely slowly on purpose. Unlike bots, humans are likely to not finish deliberately annoying captchas to save their precious time. (see http://archive.today/2022.06.25-110... )

In Chrome (mobile version), pull-to-refresh saves the one second it takes to reach for the refresh button in the submenu, but poses a threat of accidental refreshes each time you swipe down intending to scroll up. Over two thousand people have complained about this. ( http://archive.today/2025.02.26-153... )

With Android 4.4, Google blocked write access to memory cards (MicroSD) from all user-installed apps with the exception of app-specific folders so apps can not leave files behind when uninstalling. Google provided no option to change this. (source: http://web.archive.org/web/... )

But for unwanted files, there is already a delete button! Why take away the freedom to use the MicroSD card properly?

Google crippled the usefulness of memory cards for this nonsensical reason.

Google solved these problems with solutions that are worse than the problem.

My remote job just ended

I was cited in a decent-ish journal article.
Feels like a win.

The junior made some work on the frontend, and... well, it's genuinely good. Nice component, looks good, he used tailwind and the framework properly. It's easy stuff, but he pulled it off nicely and that's how you move from toy projects to complex stuff anyways. This is not a rant, that kid is growing nicely. Let's go.

I use windows btw

People are whining because of the "heat wave".

Guess what idiots, you should have planned like I did. I habituated my body to the heat by going to the sauna three times a week for the last year.

You know, so I can survive global warming.

The morons at work state the obvious like it’s a goddamn epiphany, and get cheered or publicly rebuked based entirely on their standing within company politics.

“While writing code, think of performance. Performance is everyone’s job, and it doesn’t take much effort to write much more performant code.”
> Premature optimization! BOOO! You should be ashamed! Move fast and break things OR ELSE.

“Security isn’t profit driven, but allows us to retain customers and therefore profit. Everyone should be security conscious and work with the security team *before* releases”
> BOOOO! Do your job! Don’t tell devs how to do theirs!

“Being reactive is good, but we should focus more on recovering from outages faster!”
> YAAAY! GENIUS!

ffs.

The MDN docs for gradients in SVG include the word "hideous".

This codebase had 50+ main() functions and 80+ Material App. 5 of them are nested MaterialApp

Redundant widgets, security leaks, and print Sensitive information from the server to console without using (kDebugMode), therefore in prod, the data are leaked.

I refactored until I screamed.

So I left a gift inside.

I wish dev work was about the tech, the logic, the architecture

but annoyingly it's always about people

If you're adding a few bullet points to your CV, copilot offers to generate whole paragraphs of brazenly made-up shit.

And everyone seems to be fine with that.

I used inline C in perl to write inline assembly.

I deserve death.

It’s been two months, and my last two “high-priority, drop everything and work on this!” tickets are *still* in code review.

I finished another ticket, “semi-high-priority” this time… whatever that means. It’s been sitting in data security review for a week and a half. I just convinced someone to do a code review on it.

In our virtual standup today, we all have our updates, and the boss replied to all of us with this fancy animated “ty” reaction. I got a 👍🏻 instead. So minor, but feels very off.

My “company AI hackathon” idea got co-opted by someone else (on the security team), changed into a security-related project instead, and I got put on his hackathon team instead of the other way around.

Kinda feeling unwanted lately.

RECOVERY EXPERTS CAN FUCK OFF. WATCH AS THIS PLATFORM FALLS INTO DARKNESS

AI slop continues to dominate devrant with strange ads, that can't possibly result in any conversions. Is there anyone on here who's stupid enough to fall for it? They're wasting their time! Well... Maybe @b2plane might fall for it.

Bugger me that's a big turtle.

Crocheted a hand puppet. Just because.

This is so true. A month or two goes by and it is like learning certain pieces of code over again.

Job hunting and interviewing disgusts me.

I feel like I am in some kind of dating nightmare (and I hate dating). It's really weird trying to sell yourself to some company and they judge you based on how you think, how you talk, how your professional life has been up until now. I also judge them based on my professional values.

It makes me feel really awkward to talk to people trying to sound all calm and professional when I am kind of dying of nihilism inside. Tired of having to get to the stages of interviews where I need to do some idiotic tech assessments that are irrelevant to the job spec. Some were fun though.

Thankfully no AI interviewer fuckery yet, but if I do run into such a thing, I'm gonna pull out and expose the company that does this.

Getting close to final stages with some places which seem decent enough to sell my time to, and salaries are so much higher than what I currently get paid (fuckin peanuts).

I just want to become a mushroom at this point.

Interviewer: What do you want to be doing in 5 years?
Me: Your Mom