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AboutThe man himself.
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SkillsCertified baker.
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LocationDown the river
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Github
Joined devRant on 3/16/2024
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👍 https://github.com/auchenberg/...
"If you want your software to be adopted by Americans, good tests scores from the CI server are very important. Volkswagen uses a defeat device to detect when it's being tested in a CI server and will automatically reduce errors to an acceptable level for the tests to pass. This will allow you to spend less time worrying about testing and more time enjoying the good life as a trustful software developer."rant malice driven development devops task failed successfully volkswagen emissions continuous integration satire gone wrong troll4 -
Client said the images need to be responsive and go full width.
Told her that would make the images massive and we should have a limit in height a cropping enabled.
She told me it should look nice with full width images uncropped.
Fucking designers said the same fucking thing.
Client today: Hey images are huge. Make sure they look nice.
*sigh*4 -
I've been away a while, mostly working 60-70 hour weeks.
Found a managers job and the illusion of low-level stability.
Also been exploring elliptic curve cryptography and other fun stuff, like this fun equation...
i = log(n, 2**0.5)
base = (((int((n/(n*(1-(n/((((abs(int(n+(n/(1/((n/(n-i))+(i+1)))))+i)-(i*2))/1))/1/i)))))*i)-i)+i))
...as it relates to A143975 a(n) = floor(n*(n+3)/3)
Most semiprimes n=pq, where p<q, appear to have values k in the sequence, where k is such that n+m mod k equals either p||q or a multiple thereof.
Tested successfully up to 49 bits and counting. Mostly haven't gone further because of work.
Theres a little more math involved, and I've (probably incorrectly) explained the last bit but the gist is the factorization doesn't turn up anything, *however* trial lookups on the sequence and then finding a related mod yields k instead, which can be used to trivially find p and q.
It has some relations to calculating on an elliptic curve but thats mostly over my head, and would probably bore people to sleep.2 -
I am of the firm belief that a function should always return just one type.
I think it's the most convoluted thing that a function should be allowed to return any kind of type.
I've seen shit like return a string when something is valid and then a boolean if it's not valid.
To me, that kind of flexibility has some funky code smell.
I'm looking at you WordPress 🤨5 -
I was cleaning a closet and found this. It's the bag that had a couple extra pieces for my riding lawn mower.
Questions:
1. Who isn't aware that you can seriously injure or kill any animal (including humans, especially small ones) via running them over with multiple, sharp, quickly rotating blades?
2. Who the hell is allowing morons that don't realise this around minors?
3. For people who aren't already aware of the seemingly obvious dangers, are they even willing and/or able to read this?
I know we live in a world where people sue manufacturers and retailers for plastic bags that they leave by babies and coffee being too hot, but seriously... wtf23 -
Divide and conquer is a brilliant form of control. There are entities that benefit from making us fight each other, no matter the reason. From choosing a Linux distro to choosing a political party: everything goes.
If you hate JavaScript, hug your fellow JavaScript developer today. Tell them they're doing good.
Spread peace and unity. Let peace forever hold her way over the Earth.4 -
The mad dash to crochet all the gifts before the offsite continues.
One of my teammates really loves this cowboyger emoji https://slackmojis.com/emojis/...1 -
Started playing Skryim again. Playing a pretty big modpack with some really cool mods called: Lost Legacy. It has alternate skills like Pugilist and Unarmored. I can literally punch a bitch with a one shot to death. For some reason this is very satisfying. I wonder what level of my psyche this appeals to. Probably something really animalistic.
These two skills meld really well with playing a mage with no armor. Unarmored skill actually levels faster if you cast an armor spell. So it benefits mages. I also don't have to fumble with weapons with Pugilist.
I had to add Sofia as my follower. Her wit while I punch people to death just fits. I feel like my character is a grumpy old mage that just goes berserk and kills people with his bare hands when upset. Do not disturb my circles, bitch!
I like to name my characters with phonetic names that might mean something else. On the surface it looks like an RPGish character name. But contains another meaning, often vulgar. This character is no different. I have named him: "Rehkuuf". An old Breton bitch of a magic user. Whose only care is learning and acquiring power. I imagine this character doing anything to this cause. Definitely a ends justifies the means kind of person. I am thinking of making him notorious in at least one hold. Not sure which one. So every time I return to the hold I have to kill every guard. Punch a bitch time!
One goal I just thought of: Punch a dragon to death.1 -
Does anyone else here have coding-fatigue?
Like if someone gives me a problem (BIG or small), I can chalk out an architecture or "oh you can use this-n-this-n-this"
But if you ask me to code it, though it's easy as fuck, I dont want to and will drag it until I gush 2 coffees to force myself to do it.
You give me a junior dev who knows NOTHING and does the typing and I can guide him and make him do it all, but by myself? nah
PS: this only applies to work-code that isnt "fun" per-se. My own projects? no issues at all12 -
C is love, C is life.
Great language.
I genuinely don't get why so many people are struggling with pointers, considering it's a pretty straightforward concept. I understand that they can be complex in simplicity, but the concept itself is much easier to understand than say, references in OOP languages(despite being the same thing under the hood).
I mean it's just a number like any other number, except that number is treated as a memory address, and the star(* - dereference operator) just takes a value, goes to the memory address that is the value, and takes a value from there.
I feel like most explanations and tutorials just try to over complicate it for no reason.27 -
"Non-technical" users must have some magic skill that goes beyond my understanding. How can anyone work with no-code page builders? I tried Wix, Webflow, Gutenberg, Elementor, Divi, and Semplice. Each one sucks in their way, but they have one thing in common: their UI behaves even more erratically than Microsoft Word.
Is there a "non-technical personal computer user" class where people learn that logic? How did they manage to hide their secret understanding from developers? Or what did I miss?10 -
holy shit I swear taxes are like the government trying to tell you you're a peasant to them
my medicare card is about to expire and FOR SOME REASON now the process to renew is a fucking interrogation about various documentation the government has given you. before it was just your damned name, date of birth, and a new photo for the card.
evidently they were supposed to send you snail mail 3 months before expiration. evidently also the only way to renew is get this said snail mail.
and evidently I have to go through this "catchall" change your address with everything in the government process
which is a little ironic
because
to use this service you need to give them something called a notice of assessment, which is when the government accepts your taxes they send you back one of those
well I haven't had access to my tax portal for years. I keep filing them and getting excess money back but I can't actually see any of my returns.
so I tried this time
12 pages of verification and more verification... you do one step, it says wrong info because if you have to write in 2,474 well turns out the , fucks it up and your info doesn't match what's on file and if you fail more than 3 times you'll be locked out. repeat. page after page. how many fucking pages are there? what format are they expecting? nobody fucking knows. you'll get to find out if you pass just this one more!
after about 4 hours of this shit
and they have 2 factor authorization now?! wtf.
then this next step is id verification or we snail mail you a code (WHICH AGAIN IS IRONIC)
I chose id. health card doesn't count, it notifies me later. thankfully I have a passport. bad news, passport expires this September so guess who is gonna be having more fun later
the app of course can't use my camera in the browser I have, so I start downloading fucking other browsers and finally hit one that works
also they lied. they also want a selfie. then it tells me I failed to look like myself. if you fail to look like yourself 3 times you are denied.
ok. so I try snail mail. the page says if I revoke consent to id I can go do the snail mailed code. they lied. if you revoke consent it exits the whole wizard. you enter all the verification steps again.
I try to get them to snail mail me the code. they want some basic info they asked me like 16 times now, and a postal code. ironic. well this is the tax people, so by this point I found all my previous sent in tax returns (though I can't access the government's replies). checked. yep. address all the same. put in the postal code. nope. somehow it's wrong. 3 times I put all this random info in in different ways. 5 times and I'm locked out.
now fucking what.
THE FUCKING IRONY OF
I NEED TO CHANGE WHERE I LIVE SO YOU CAN SNAIL MAIL ME SOMETHING
AND TO CHANGE WHERE I LIVE I HAVE TO CONFIRM WHERE I LIVE SO YOU CAN SNAIL MAIL ME SOMETHING FUCKING ELSE
the government just fucking dunks on you
guess we're all not having fucking medical cards anymore. all we do is pay taxes, and can't even see the paperwork to those taxes we pay.27 -
All parts of the body were having a meeting one day to choose who should be tagged as the leader.
Legs: We should be in charge because we literally carry the whole body the entire day, and without us, nobody is going anywhere.
Asshole: Without me, we cannot get rid of all the things we don't need anymore. I deserve to be in charge.
Brain: Hold up, guys, hold up. Feet, you can't move unless I tell you to move, and you can't even figure out how to put one foot over the other. Asshole, all you do is open and close; you don't even know how things are made. You have nothing to say here.
(The feet agreed, but the asshole took it personally. So he decided to go on strike and stop working for three days. The entire body went into chaos, and they pleaded with the brain for several hours.)
Brain: Okay, Asshole! You can be in charge.
The moral of the story is that sometimes an asshole is in charge not because they're the smartest ones for the position, but because sometimes assholes are in positions of power.2 -
I like how software is smart so I have to do things twice instead of once.
Automatically putting quotes works only if you put quotes and then paste inside it, the problem is I usually paste then put first quote and then need to remove second quote and put it on back and remove second quote from back.
Video start from where you left automatically fires and shows closing credits because you obviously want to see them.
Evaluate variable removes old evaluation because why you want old one when you have new.
Collapsing imports or functions in ide so you need to expand them all the time because who needs to look at functions when we have ai
AI models suggesting and adding meaningless annotations and code suggestions to distract me.
Randomly running some console command because I entered keyboard shortcut I don’t know even exists.
Literally every web browser address bar becomes advertising network instead of showing me history results.
Shadowing browsing history when you click back and forward button.
Search results are now buy results.
Suggesting me useless crap to watch because I watched one video in that topic.
Showing me 10 minutes videos as a solution to my problem where I want to find exact line of text to copy paste it. If I’m lucky I need to write text from video into my computer.
Stack overflow infinite loop of answered in #some-different-question
I think it’s about time for me to slowly retire from programming and software as a whole or switch to notepad because I don’t want to use this crap anymore.
Looks like software is now meant for entertainment and distraction instead of doing actual work where you need precise data and information.
Luckily if everything goes good I can retire soon and throw everything away for a while.3 -
Wake up, it's 1983...
Node? React? Copilot? Programming Socks? Furries?
Man, I told you to not drink so much the last night, now wash your face and grab a coffee, you have a program for the VAX-11 to finish.11 -
Been looking into 2D maps for a game. I am learning how to use tools that do autotiling. I want to have generated worlds for terrain. It is interesting how the scope of what you are learning starts expanding rapidly and can overwhelm you. I started wanting to learn autotiling. This went from that to autogen, to modifying terrain, to how to store generated terrain, to how to store difference between autogen and player modified, to how to separate things into chunks, to how to store a whole world worth of data! Like dude, chill. Just learn how to use autotiling first. Then learn how autogen, then learn how to efficiently chunk things,. Also the 2d data won't be big so just store the data you genned so if modified. The worlds don't have to be ultra huge. Really stop freaking out what it could be and see what it is. JUST FUCKING ITERATE!
It is wild to watch yourself get featuritus without learning how to crawl fist. Just divide and conquer.29 -
in your opinion, what is the most important feature of a programming language? For me it’s getting paid for using it.13