It’s not a bug, it’s a feature.

Had a dodgy stomach. Muted the mic & let out an almighty fart.

Only, as you'll have guessed (and I quickly guessed from the silence that followed), I'd missed the mute button.

Please sir please

Lmao who does ths

When the PM says that it's a 'temp solution'

⚫⚫⚫⚫🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️

Santa is just a glorified sprint master

To the cunt who named himself "Uncaught ReferenceError: username is not defined":
Sincerely, fuck you.

Facebook publicly announced that it won't build a backdoor into its services for the intelligence agencies as for the latest requests to weaken/remove the encryption.

I can only imagine the intelligence agencies going like this now:

NSA director: Alright, as expected they said no so they won't have more damage to their public image, lets go for plan A 2.0!
NSA employee: Aaaand that is?
NSA director: Serve them a FISA court order requiring them to do this shit anyways but also serve a gag order so they can't tell legally.
NSA employee: Ahh, fair enough, I'll get that rolling. By the way, how did we do this with WhatsApp's encryption again?
NSA director: Oh that one was simple. There's a backup function which nearly everyone uses on either Android/iOS which does plaintext backups to Google Drive/iCloud.
NSA employee: Oh, okay. How do we access that data again?
NSA director: PRISM/XKeyScore!
NSA employee: Right, but then still the issue of how we even collect the encrypted messages from Facebo...
NSA director: PRISM/XKeyScore as well, don't worry about that.
NSA employee: But, how'd we justify this....?
NSA director: We probably never have to as these programs operate outside of the public view but otherwise just call terrorism/pedophelia... BAM, done.
NSA employee: Gotya, let's put this into motion!

Holy fuck, muscle memory just saved my ass.

At a train station wanting to do some work on my mini laptop which has disk encryption (LUKS I think). Realised that I forgot the password partly 😬

Few tries.... incorrect. FUCK.

*hey, let's try to let my hands do the work based on muscle memory!*

*starts typing the password (its insanely long) and presses enter*

*succesfully unlocked, booting...*

😅

GUYS!!! SHE SAID "YES" !!!!

I'M SOOOO HAPPYYYYY!!!

All my dreams are becoming real! I was so nervous to ask, but it was worth it! I waited for the right moment, looked her in her eyes, she looked at mine.. And there I asked it: "are you willing to give it a try and install libreoffice instead of ms office?"

AND SHE SAID: "yes"!!!

Do I have the best wife or what!

Not mine, found this on Reddit, still a good read
========
I work in IT as a lead developer, as in I run the department. One of my team leads is female, let's call her Ripley. She is young, smart, and a great dev.

Today she met with a new customer to discuss a big project. Project management sent a male project manager (Hicks).

It started perfectly with Customer asking Ripley for coffee. He's informed about her status and mutters something like an apology. He is visibly unhappy.

He then proceeds to ask Hicks technical questions despite having been told that Ripley will answer all the technical stuff. Ripley tries to answer questions. Customer ignores Ripley and continues talking to Hicks.

Hicks tells him politely that Ripley is the one to talk to, since he is not a dev and unable to help him. Ripley tries again to explain stuff.

Customer gets angry and demands another developer, since Ripley is "obviously far too young for a project of this complexity". Ripley rolls her eyes and leaves. Not the first time this happens.

Hicks smoothes the waves and tells the customer that the senior lead developer will personally answer all his questions. Customer is satisfied.

I walk in and calmly introduce myself.

The customer - now far less satisfied - was forced to discuss all his questions with yours truly, the 47 year old female IT nerd. I was very professional, friendly, and businesslike, he was visibly uncomfortable and irritated by the situation.

It's petty and stupid, but man, it felt great watching his face fall when I entered. I've been in Ripley's shoes far too often and today I heard 23 old me cheering me on.

Ripley loved it as well. She made sure to smile extra brightly at customer when she walked past the meeting room on her way to the coffee machine.
======
https://reddit.com/r/...

Random acts of cuteness. This is my wife’s new therapy dog. It’s a King Charles Cavalier Spaniel.

Adding features to a legacy codebase

Every website now except mine.. well, when it goes live 😂. Anyway found on Twitter

damn this is brilliant

Me for good 10 days

both sides are real

Kill him!!

penguins ...

its happening.
its finally being blown out of existence!!!!!!

Farewell flash, my old friend. you have no place in the web today

Poor little CPU 😁

I also do...

I'm seeing my baby son tomorrow

Looping around!

Started doing some vector art. Ended up with boo as an ice-cream?!

We had recently a thread asking about our internet speeds, this seems relevant to most of what I've read in the comments so far.

(•_•)
<) )╯i
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\(•_•)
( (> got
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(•_•)
<) )> promoted
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I actually lent a girl an umbrella yesterday which takes the total number of girls I've made wet this year to -1.

Got fren to Telegram with me