When you come back to the first link you found googling and only now you understand it because of the bits and pieces you gathered meanwhile.

It's true

So couple of days ago I've told you that I've made an Duck Hunt Easter Egg in one of my utilities. And @jiraTicket asked me:
"How on earth do you get a decent gameplay out of Duck Hunt without a Nintendo lightning gun?"

Well the answer is..:
Connecting Leap Motion and making them suffer..

P.s. It took me a loooong time to hit that duck with this controller=))))

When a Senior Developer hands off their project to a Junior to implement new features

"So do you want me to do {thing} OR {mutually exclusive thing}?"

"Yes."

New web devs don't know the struggle of using spacer.gif, nested table layouts, and vibrant "web friendly" colors out of requirement.

Anyone else the scrum master for their team?

Great guide 🙌🏼😅

When your project manager pisses you off so much, you could punch a baby or drown a puppy....

Client: "Please make carrots with these tomato seeds."
Me: "But that's not possible."
Client: "These are strict requirements. Or we have to find someone who can."

** takes said tomatoes and makes them physically look carrots. Presents said carrots excited that I may pull this off **

Client: "These carrots are not blue like all known carrots. We've decided to go with someone else."

Ffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuu

"How long will this bug that you have no background or context for take to fix" I DON'T KNOW

When you try to post a gif to devRant and it doesn't animate

Anybody know any good .net web devs in Sydney? I'm sick of reading seek and LinkedIn resumes where 95% of the applicants have a phone number starting with +91 and are skilled in "user testing and SAP".

I mean, what are they expecting? "Absolutely sir, we will mail you a first class plane ticket right now for your interview! Oh .net was just a suggestion, you can code in COBOL if you prefer. And don't worry about that pesky working Visa, we can pay cash!"

When scope creep actually becomes a complete rewrite for a different architecture.

When designer uses multiple different variations of grey.

Yes please!

Css life

I hate programming.
I hate programming.
I hate programming.
IT WORKS!
I love programming.

Me: why are you using so many break tags?

Intern: Its the only way I can position this div below that form.

Me: *facepalm*

It's just not the weekend until you are asked to break protocol for a Live-At-Five Friday deploy.

Boss: Can you refactor some of the code [dev who recently quit] wrote? Y'know, improve the readability a little bit.

Me: Sure thing. *opens project*

Project: *has 76 variables named var2 through var78*

900 lines to build an HTML select list which displayed the months from January until the current month, for picking which months data to display seems a tad excessive... probably good the guy who did it doesn't work anymore.

when the project manger asks for status on a ticket.
me: what ticket
pm: hold on. (makes ticket). that one.

like a drug

All too often.

Being a developer is like being a mechanic at a car manufacturer. Except that everybody else in the company is completely clueless about how a car actually works and the client doesn't have a license.

IE6 sucks

Devlife

My boss literally spends half an hour finger-fucking his phone on the mobile site to find "bugs", that I can't replicate. A combination like: swipe, pinch, landscape, portrait, back pinch, open new tab, close tab, ash cigarette on phone, dunk in toilet, dry, double tap... Aha I've found a bug, there's 0.5 pixel line of space between the bag header and the browser bar.

Everyone always says the previous developer was crap, sometimes you're right