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Search - "don't give up"
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Me and my girlfriend are arguing, because I'm programming a lot and I don't have time to give her attention. She said if I don't give her attention, she will break up with me.
Any suggestion where I can find a good tutorial for C#?37 -
Long rant ahead, but it's worth it.
I used to work with a professor (let's call him Dr. X) and developed a backend + acted as sysadmin for our team's research project. Two semesters ago, they wanted to revamp the front end + do some data visualization, so a girl (let's call her W) joined the team and did all that. We wanted to merge the two sites and host on azure, but due to issues and impeding conferences that require our data to be online, we kept postponing. I graduate this semester and haven't worked with the team for a while, so they have a new guy in charge of the azure server (let's call him H), and yesterday my professor sends me (let's call me M), H and W an email telling us to coordinate to have the merge up on azure in 2-3 days, max. The following convo was what I had with H:
M: Hi, if you just give me access to azure I'll be able to set everything up myself, also I'll need a db set up, and just send me the connection string.
H: Hi, we won't have dbs because that is extra costs involved since we don't have dynamic content. Also I can't give you access, instead push everything on git and set up the site on a test azure server and I will take it from there.
M: There is proprietary data on the site...
H: Oh really? I don't know what's on it.
<and yet he knows we have no dynamic data>
M: Fine, I'll load the data some other way, but I have access to all the data anyway, just talk to Dr. X and you'll see you can give me access. Delete my access after if you want.
H: No, just do what I said: git then upload to test azure account.
Fine, he's a complete tool, but I like Dr. X, so I message W and tell her we have to merge, she tells me that it's not that easy to set it up on github as she's using wordpress. She sends me instructions on what to do, and, lo and behold, there's a db in her solution. Ok, I go back to talking to H:
M: W is using a db. Talk to her so we can figure out whether we need a database or not.
H: We can't use a database because we want to decrease costs.
M: Yes I know that, so talk to her because that probably means she has to re-do some stuff, which might take some time. Also there might be dynamic content in what she's doing.
H: This is your project, you talk to her.
<I'm starting to get mad right now>
M: I don't know what they had her do apart from how it interfaces with what I've done.
H: We still can't have databases.
M: Listen, I don't do wordpress, and I'm not gonna mess with it, you talk to her
H: I won't do any development
<So you won't do any dev, but you won't give me access to do it either?>
M: Man, the bottleneck isn't the merging right now, it's the fact that W needs a db
H: I know, so talk to her
M: THE RESTRICTION TO NOT HAVE DATABASES IS NOT MINE, IT'S YOURS, YOU TALK TO HER. I can't evaluate whether it's a reasonable enough reason or not since I don't know the requirements or what they're willing to spend.
H: It's your project.
M: Then give me fucking access to azure and I'll handle it, you know you'll have to set up wordpress again regardless whether we set it up the first time.
H: Man just do your job.
At this point I lost it. WHAT A FUCKING TOOL. He doesn't wanna do dev work, wants me to go through the trouble of setting up on a test subscription first, and doesn't want to give me access to azure. What's more, he did shit all and doesn't want to anything else. Well fuck you. I googled him, to see if he's anyone important, if he's done anything notable which is why he's being so God damn condescending. MY INTERNSHIP ALONE ECLIPSES HIS ENTIRE CV. Then what the fuck?
There's also this that happened sometime during our talk:
M: You'll have to take to Dr. Y so he'll change the DNS to point to the azure subscription instead of my server.
H: Yea don't worry, too early for that.
M: DNS propagation takes 24 hours...
H: Yea don't worry.
DNS propagation allows the entire web to know that your website is hosted on a different server so it can change where it's pointing to. We have to do this in 2-3 days. Why do work in parallel? Nah let's wait.
I went over his head and talked to the professor directly, and despite wanting to tell him that he was both drunk and high the day he hired that guy, I kept it professional. He hasn't replied yet, but this fucker's pompous attitude is just too much for me alone, so I had to share.
PS: I named his contact as Annoying Prick 4 minutes into our chat. Gonna rename him cz that seems tooooooo soft a name right now.undefined tools i have access and you don't haha retards why the fuck would you hire that guy? i don't do development46 -
Biggest hurdle: torn between having boobs and missing an arm. I swear some people are under the assumption the brain is in the arm.
I am fully capable of building your network, resolving your outage due to your faulty code, can even tell you how many users your database can support at once. I don't need arms for that. Nor do my boobs distract me that badly.
"but men are going to make your life so hard" yup. And that's true no matter where i go
"all that typing with one arm can't be good for your back" welp. Find me a job that doesn't require a computer. Or manual labor. If you think typing will fuck me up, that's DEFINITELY out of the equation
"you're too pretty, there's no way this can make sense" dafuq you just say?!?!
"why don't you just stay home on disability, I'm sure you qualify, you wouldn't need to work" I'd rather be a fucking trophy wife if I'm staying at home. Fuck that.
And many more.
Sometimes they're fun. Give me more dumb arguments to counter? ;)55 -
Holy fucking hell!
Who the fuck sets up a local network with an 255.255.0.0 subnet mask and then lets the dhcp-server distribute clients onto the 192.249.x.x., 192.2.x.x and the 192.22.x.x networks AT FUCKING RANDOM???
I need to SSH onto 40 routers distributed across the entire campus and have a WORKING internet connection while doing so and you make me spin the connect-disconnect-wheel. Fucking hell dude, don't give me that "Uh, it wasn't intended for this size"-bullshit. You have about 200 active devices. And in one subnet you have space for more than 60 000. Fuck you, dumbass! OH, YOUR FUCKING LIST IS FUCKING WRONG AND YOU DON'T REMEMBER THE IP OF THE ROUTERS? OH FUCK YOU EVEN HARDER!!!
Goddamn people why does legacy maintenance always suck so much?😭😭😭4 -
We build a backup infrastructure at work to make sure that clients can restore their files and databases themselves when something gets fucked up.
We also have step by step tutorial on how to do this.
Every fucking day we get requests to restore backups.
Mostly used reason is "I'm a technical so I won't understand it".
With all due respect, if you don't understand this and keep asking without even trying, please don't host with us.
Because, if you did as I asked and actually read through the entire article, you would.
In case you're wondering, anytime one of us asks what part they don't understand, that question is simply ignored and they pushing for us restoring it anyways continues.
Sometimes they get angry and want to talk to someone higher up or start complaining that they're paying loads of money already and that it would just take us a second anyways.
If you would read the fucking tutorial/manual instead of trying to eat out your mother's badly shaved pussy and hopefully choke on it while you're at it, you wouldn't come asking us for it.
If you genuinely don't understand this article, feel free to ask but also provide us with cocksucking feedback.
Why do you think you have the right anyways to ask us to do it for free? We maintain the backup infrastructure which definitely isn't cheap but we do it so that you, pubic sniffing weazel, can do this shit on your fucking own.
You're entitled to ask us for help but not for asking us to restore your bullshit for free every freaking time.
Tip: give your parents some condoms. Because that way they hopefully won't reproduce again, we don't need more of you in this universe.7 -
1998 talk: Copy the Internet
I was surfing the web on my good old windows 98 pc, a younger friend comes to my place and sees me using IE. Sudently he asks:
Friend: What is that program?
Me: It's Internet Explorer.
Fr: - What is it for?
Me: - Well, you can write something here, (url), to go to different sites, search for stuff you like, participate in foruns, etc...
Fr: - Oh yeah, I know what that is, my cousin also has that in his PC, but I don't.
...(Little pause)...
- Can you copy the internet for me? Because I don't have it.
Me: You can't copy the Internet! You need a phone connection.
Fr - But I'll give you a floppy disk, you put that program there, and then I can use it too.
Me - The shortcut won't give you Internet!
I think I ended up copying the shortcut of IE to him, just to prove my point.
The funny thing is that the link really worked because he also had IE in his machine, while not in the workspace, however it was exactly in the same folder location as mine, but obviously he didn't had a wired phone connection.
Fr - "Maybe I need to copy something more! The program opens but it doesn't show anything."7 -
So apparently devRant is a problem in my life. As those of you who've read any of my stuff here know I work at Victoria's Secret. So two of my friends come in just before I was ending my shift to see what the plans were for tonight. The usual - hit the club, crash at one of our houses.
Thing is, I was scrolling through devRant when they walked up. (the below is paraphrased)
Friend1: Ugh, you're still on that thing?
Friend2: Is she really? <looks over my shoulder>
Me: <eyeroll>
Friend2: I don't get it. <pokes me in the left tit> You barely post on Instagram and you don't tweet anymore. And you haven't commented on any of my posts in like days. Wtf bitch?
Disclaimer: Yes, we are those girls who talk like that and go clubbing and dress up and makeup and all that shit. Don't judge me because I don't give a fuck. Anyway...
Friend1: Seriously.
Me: Really? We're doing this? Because I haven't posted on fucking Instagram? I talk to you every day. I see you every other day. I like coding. I like tech. This place is awesome and the people are cool. If I want to see your ass or your outfit, I can just look at you. I don't need to be on Instagram 24/7.
Friend2: Jeez bitch. Need a tampon
<we all laugh>
Me: This is my thing. It doesn't mean we aren't friend and we won't chill, but my future is in development and technology. So deal hoes.
Friend1: Ugh you're such a nerd.
Friend2: <laughing>
Me: And you're both like totally vapid sluts. But I love you.
Friend2: Jelly
Friend1: Totes jelly. Girl you need some vitamin D
Me: I'm sayin'. But that doesn't mean I won't spend my free time coding.
Friend2: Ugh alright we don't give a fuck. Code or whatever. Just be ready at 11.
We all flip each other the bird and they leave. I guess if that's the level of acceptance I can get from my wonderful, gorgeous, annoying, amazing, asshole best friends, I'll take it. I am not changing my path.69 -
I was an intern - as a high school student. They had no idea what to do with an intern, let alone a high school student that was only there around three hours a day.
They tried to saddle me with a massive "how to use Perforce" manual, but I flat refused and told them to give me some real work.
In the end I wound up writing a text parser in Python to get some specific info from some files. They decided it wasn't actually needed after I finished it (I don't think they expected me to), on my last week there. I just played solitaire the rest of the time. I learned a few things:
1. I never want to work at Adtran.
2. Perforce should die in a fire.
3. Experience != Expertise.
4. Don't be afraid to put yourself on the line if it means potentially accomplishing something.3 -
So my friend started a YouTube channel, being the motivational man I am I encouraged him and made him a logo for his channel.
It started here, he called me a bazillion times every single day asking me to make stuff like Channel banners, intros.
He even went so far to call my design bad and that I could do better.
I'm definitely losing my hold on my generosity, it's like this with every single fucktard I help. It's like programmers don't get to have a life, people pitch me stupid ideas at every party.. Having a casual conversation a guy starts talking about an idea.
Oooh... And the worst part they say you can have 60% and just give them 40% 'MINORITY' share for coming up with an idea I could pull up from my arse instantaneously
Next time he asks me something I'm gonna fuck him up or just charge him a bazillion dollars... FUCK FUCK FUCK... REALLY GOT TO BUY THAT STUPID STRESS CUBE15 -
If your IDE found
10 errors
and 47 warns
would you correct them
or let them slip.
YO ...
His palms are sweaty
Knees weak, arms are heavy
The tests are failing already
Code spaghetti.
He's nervous,
But at his laptop he looks calm and ready
To squash bugs
But he keeps on forgetting
What he wrote down, the whole team goes so loud
He opens his file, but the code won't come out
He's chokin', how, everybody's jokin' now
The deadline run out, times up, over, blaow!
Snap back to reality, oh there goes file integrity
Oh, there goes documentation, he choked
He's so mad, but he won't give up that easy? No
He won't have it, he knows his whole header's code
It don't matter, he's dope, he knows that, but he's broke
He's so stacked that he knows, when he goes back to his mobile home, that's when its
Back to the office again yo, this whole rhapsody
He better go capture this moment and hope it don't pass him
Note: All credits to the original owners of these phrases.5 -
If. You. Don't. Contact. Us. With. A. Registered. Email. Address. Or. Phone. Number. Then. I'm. Not. Giving. You. Any. Information. Relating. To. 'your'. Account.
Oh you "don't agree" with that?
Guess what, never gonna give you up!
Oh, typo, that should've been: never gonna give a fuck!
No, seriously, I couldn't care less.48 -
⚪Present yourself properly
⚪Have a basic idea about the company and the role you're applying for
⚪Be respectful and pleasant to everyone when you go to an interview
⚪Day before the interview, go over the interview in your head and prepare as much as you can ( this way you'll be more comfortable in the actual interview )
⚪Figure out and prepare your "Strength and weakness" answers
⚪Don't lie on your resume or in the interviews, if you don't know something, simply say "I'm sorry i don't have experience with that”
⚪Being nervous is ok, but try to relax and answer the questions correctly and clearly
⚪Don't give up and join something that's not worth investing your time5 -
> *WordPress website gets down Error 500: Cannot establish Connection with database*
> Marketing loses their shit: "We need the website up and working right now"
> *Me being calm *: "Nope, we cannot it's the service provider error, there's nothing we can do"
> *MK.G*: "Alright then, switch to another ISP ASAP"
> *Me, Internal rage, a volcano erupts *: "Umm..so you want to spend more money on another hosting because this one has an outage of 48 hours?"
>*MK.G *: "Yes, because we cannot run Facebook ads, just because website is down"
>*Internal lmao*: "Alright, but by the time you purchase a new service provider and host, the website will be up and running plus since the database is down we cannot migrate"
>*MK.G*: "I don't care, just make it up and working"
>*Me chilling*: "Alright, give me few hours"
> after a few hours the website is working *me being badass even though I didn't do anything*13 -
!Rant
Senior dev from another team comes up to me:
"you alright? Looks like you're struggling with something. Want me to give you a hand?"
And my personal favourite:
"feel free to slack me whenever you need help. Don't be afraid to ask questions. Only way to learn is to ask"
He also recommended me some books and resources to read.
I left work today motivated af!1 -
Don't you love when you spend the whole night trying to find the cause of an elusive bug, then you give up, you go to sleep, and the next morning after only 30s of looking at the code you finally find it and fix it?2
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***Interviewing potential sys admins so us devs don't have to build everything and run everything***
Coworker: Do you know how to use cron and cron jobs?
Candidate: Yes I'm familiar with setting up users and permissions.
Me: 😳
Coworker: 😳
Boss: We will give you a call have a good day.
If you had just admitted you didn't know but we thought you could learn we might have been open to teaching you but brazenly acting like you know something when you don't is dangerous if you're running a multi thousand user production system.3 -
This is for all the developers out there. Keep learning and keep going!
"No matter how many mistakes you make or how slow you progress, you are still way ahead of everyone who isn't trying."1 -
I love it when I spend 20+ minutes answering someone's question on the Stack and they don't even bother accepting my answer, or upvoting. I'm gonna give up on that website soon.4
-
Development is a team sport.
If you think you can do something better but your team doesn't understand it or can't work with them. You have two options: Teach them or don't do it.
This task seems easy but teach and tell are different things. Prepare to repeat things over and over again and give up your own time to share the knowledge.9 -
Manual Data Entry: Most boring job
This reminds me of one conversation with one of my faculty..
Faculty: Why not try some Machine Learning Project?
Me: Cool. Any ideas you have already thought
Faculty: Comes up with a really noble idea
Me: Awesome idea. But we need data
Faculty: Don't worry. I will get it. Just help me setup Hadoop (see the irony.. no data yet, and he wants big data setup)
Me: But we don't have data. Let's focus of data collection, Sir
Faculty: I will get it. Don't worry. Trust me.
( I did setup for him twice coz he formatted the system on which I did the setup first time)
After 6 months,
Me: (same question) Sir, Data??
Faculty: I got it.
Me: Great. Give me, I can start looking into it from today.
Faculty: Actually, it's in a register written manually in a different language (which even I can't understand) I will hire data entry guys to convert it into English digital contents.
Me: *facepalm*
Road to Manual data entry to Big Data
Dedicating this pencil to the individuals keeping the register up to date and Sir in hopes of converting it into big data..
Long way to go..
4 -
When you come back to the first link you found googling and only now you understand it because of the bits and pieces you gathered meanwhile.
3 -
FUCKING SHIT.
I'm at my first Hackathon with my best friends in life and there has never been a time when I've felt this miserable all my life.
The theme is IoT (something idk jackshit about) and people here are done with the projects when we are still at the idea stage.
Yes, it's true that this shit is intense but I really want to do good at this.
This is what I've learned from my first Hackathon:
1. Prepare your shit.
Unless the problem statements are given on the spot, you should've discussed everything that you would be doing and not divert. (We spent 5 hours on a problem statement and then we decided not to go with it.)
2. Have people with different abilities who you can trust to get the work done without you having to give a second thought.
3. Don't you dare build a sub-par application. What's the fucking use of that? Don't do it for the certificate or the stickers. If you do that, then how the fuck can you make yourself put those stickers on your laptop?!
4. Have food. Keep yourself healthy and up to max potential.
5. DO NOT BE DISCOURAGED. A lot of people will look like they're done with the shit. You know what you have to do now? NOT GIVE A FUCK! Just focus and do your thing and make it awesome.7 -
Normally when someone calls in and I pick up, they either don't call from an authorized number and get mad when we I don't give information, ask for advice and then say that it isn't logical and ask for a different answer or are just stubborn as a motherfucker.
Then I suddenly get a call from someone who I can verify easily, listens carefully to my answers and thanks me in the end.
Where can I get more of those clients?!15 -
F*** all this motivational/inspirational shit going on nowadays. We don't need cold showers, wake up 4:30 AM, or sacrifice time with loved ones just because our ego wants to be successful.
What if I don't want it, what if I just want to BBQ some chickens, drink Red Bull, and watch some Netflix shows until I die.
I don't want to own a Lamborghini, big apartment, live in a warm place with a nice view over the blue ocean, etc. This is just an illusional life-style story that every single person in the world wants, and the reason is so media and commercial companies can trick people to buy whatever they want.
I don't give a shit, we'll all die someday, I don't need these things in my life to make me feel happy or complete. I've seen people with everything, yet they commit suicide because the inner self is broken.
Just be happy with whatever you have, and stop going after things that won't really make you happy. The fact you have eyes to see, ears to hear, and hands to feel is worth billions in itself.
Wake up.19 -
My ex-boyfriend once saw my post on the devRant and he said something, in a demeaning way, that don't screw up your brain with all this. Till now this community has given me support that he couldn't give me in his time. Instead he created problems. That's why he is my ex. :)
Thanks to dev Rant. :)10 -
devRant is truly amazing, a social network where I don't have to give up on privacy by giving out my number to confirm that I am legit when I'd use something as a VPN to protect my identity (unlike twitter facebook and google)
Thanks for giving a fuck about privacy and not giving a fuck about my data11 -
dear anyone looking to teach kids programming (especially organizations):
- please be realistic. teach things your students can use. how to debug, how to solve realistic, real-world problems. not how to make a turtle draw a circle, that's not programming.
- please don't have blocks. just don't. they hurt.
- focus on your content instead of putting up posters on the wall with celebrities talking about the importance of programming
- don't call it 'code,' call it 'program.' do you know how different muggles think they are?
- please teach in a logical order. too many times have I seen commands --> functions --> variables/variable types --> then back to functions and return types.
- don't set an appropriate "age" to do it. please. its enough for people to learn to program, but to be told they're too "old" for a course? I can't tell you how many forgetful seniors and special needs students have been insulted. and don't even get me started on being too young. knowledge is knowledge, skill is skill, ability is ability.
- teach concepts with programming. don't separate them. they work better when they're taught together.
- understanding is more important than style. for beginners, fuck style. all of your program could be all on one line for fucks sake. I've had teachers chose style > functionality, because, fuck working programs, right?
- let your content speak for itself. this is not the place for celebrity endorsements.
- give resources for after a lesson is complete. when a beginner is finished, recommend more resources. you're never done learning.
most of these were things code.org did wrong. fuck them. I was in a constructive criticism mood today…5 -
The learning curve for programming is more like steps than a curve.
Really tall steps.
And they go on forever.
Eventually you die. Leaving your body as a landmark for those who come after you. Unless you're completely useless. Then your body just ends up at the bottom of a gully.
The point is don't give up. Don't die in a gully. Each dead end is a wall to clime. Every plateau is just the path to the next step.5 -
"IT BROKEN!", the QA tester spoke in unintelligible broken English.
The developer asked for more details.
Then the QA person attempted to explain the problem in a surge of verbal diarrhea and horrible English.
Why do we hire people who don't speak the language of the development team as our QA people? I have nothing against devs and qa guys from India...but it makes my job really difficult when I can't even begin to understand what you are telling me, or even worse...you just tell me "IT BROKEN!" and don't give me a single bit of useful information on how to reproduce the error.
There was this wonderful QA person I used to work with. Her name was Ranjana. She was a beautiful Indian girl with two children, and the best QA person I ever worked with. She took screenshots, grabbed logs, and gave steps to reproduce everything she found. And then one day at stand up we were told she had died. And since then...there has been no one who has ever come close to her level of excellence.7 -
I found this posted by a recruiter and I liked it:
| hired someone that didn't shake my hand firmly during the
interview - he rocked as an employee.
| hired someone with three typos on their resume. - She was
the most detailed oriented person l’ve ever worked with.
| hired someone without a college degree- He was way
smarter, innovative, and creative than mel!
| hired someone with four kids- Never met someone so
devoted and committed to her career.
| hired someone who had been incarcerated as a young adult.
- He's a VP now.
| hired someone over 60- she taught me some tricks on excel
that | use to this day!
Can we please throw out all those silly assumptions and rules that we've made up in our head about what a person needs to
be, look like, have accomplished, and do, to succeed?
In my experience, as an HR leader and as a hiring manager, it's those that typically don't get a “shot” who tend to kick butt
in the workplace!
So before you throw that resume away because they don't have every certificate and degree - or - don't call back that candidate because they didn't give you a firm handshake - think about trying something new. Someone new.10 -
Came to work and there ware my boss and CEO waiting there next to my place.
"Hey, you remember that you mentioned yesterday that you had a break through and the thing is finally starting to do something? We have few journalist downstairs can we show them a demo in like five minutes?"
"Ok, give me five minutes and don't click here and there otherwise it blows up."
My boss came back from presentation after ten minutes that it doesn't work, after little investigation turns out to be hw issue, replaced hardware went to the conference room and it worked.
Crazy deadlines? No, just another day at work. -
What kind of cum gargling gerbil shelfer stores and transmits user passwords in plain text, as well as displays them in the clear, Everywhere!
This, alongside other numerous punishable by death, basic data and user handling flaws clearly indicate this fucking simpleton who is "more certified than you" clearly doesn't give a flying fuck about any kind of best practice that if the extra time was taken to implement, might not totally annihilate the company in lawsuits when several big companies gang up to shower rape us with lawsuits over data breaches.
Even better than that is the login fields don't even differentiate between uppercase or lowercase, I mean WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK DO YOU SELF RIGHTEOUS IGNORANT CUNTS THINK IS GOING TO HAPPEN IN THIS SCENARIO?13 -
FUCK CORPORATE EMAIL SPAM
AND I DON'T MEAN SOME SOME EXTERNAL SCAM/AD/PISHING EMAILS
I MEAN THE SHIT MY OWN COMPANY SENDS TO ME
LIKE:
"tHE WelLbeIng Course : SiGN In now!!!!!"
"#MoRnIngcOfFEE witH SOME cORporatE TWAt"
"Give togetHER : LETs circLE JerK OurSeLveS in SOMe fuCKiNg oNLiNe mEetInG !!!!!!!"
I DON'T FUCKING CARE !
I GET DOZENS (IF NOT FUCKING HUNDREDS) OF SUCH SHIT EMAILS EVERY DAY.
IF I GO ON VACATION, I HAVE TO SPEND HOURS TO SORT SHIT OUT
I HAVE HAD TO SET UP ELABORATE OUTLOOK RULES TO GET IT SORTED AUTOMATICALLY INTO SOME MANAGEABLE FOLDERS (AND SPEND SOME OF MY LIMITED TIME, HERE ON EARTH, TO DO SO)
AND GUESS WHAT
THANKS TO THOSE STUPID RULES I MISSED, ONE FUCKING IMPORTANT EMAIL
CAN YOU JUST STOP FUCKING SPAMMING ME ?!!!
FOR CHRIST SAKE AND I DON'T CARE ABOUT THIS STUPID CORPORATE BULLSHIT
STOP SENDING IT TO ME9 -
Microshaft!!!
NO I DON'T WANT TO GIVE UP ALL MY DATA JUST TO GET AN EXPLORER DARK THEME!!!
YES I DISABLED TELEMETRY PARTIALLY!!
YES I STILL WANT TO RECEIVE UPDATES REGARDLESS OF WHETHER I EXPRESS MY DESIRES TO NOT BE TRACKED IN FULL!!!
NO I REALLY DON'T WANT TO HEAR SHIT ABOUT "THIS FUCKING QUESTION HAS BEEN ANSWERED SOMEWHERE ELSE"!!!
(https://answers.microsoft.com/en-us... - certified Microshit MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!!)
AND NO I DON'T WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU THAT AFTER RE-ENABLING TELEMETRY THAT MY PRIVACY SETTINGS ARE STILL TOO LOW!!! AND CERTAINLY I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOUR WORTHLESS "FIX ME" SHIT UNABLE TO FIX JACK SHIT!!!
AND LIKE FUCKING HELL DO I WANT TO REINSTALL WANBLOWS, FUCKING KEEP MY SHITTY FILES THAT ARE FUCKING BACKED UP BUT LOSE ALL MY CUSTOM CONFIGURATIONS!!! LIKE FUCKING HELL!!! NOT BECAUSE YOU CAN'T FIX YOUR OWN BLOODY SYSTEM AFTER I DID MY PART TO GIVE MY DATA TO THE SHAFTLORDS AGAIN!!!
FUCK YOU MICROSOFT!!!!23 -
>Have 64gb memeory stick with software and precious memories (back ups of childhood pictures and stuff)
>Go to girlfriend's house
>Let her borrow it because she needed it for photography (pictures in the TrueCrypt file take only about a quarter of the drive)
>Get dumped by girlfriend after a while
>Shrug and be a little sad
>Find out that i dont have a local copy of what was there
>Don't have courage to ask for it back or even speak to her
>Cry because of now gone data
>Cry because no back ups.
Moral of the story is dont fuck with your back up and also, don't give people precious data, even the ones you trust at the time.4 -
Most common UX blunder: Icons
FUCK icons. The big problem with them is they assume a level of familiarity with the product. Someone who has never seen a folder before won't know what a button with a folder icon on it does!
This can be remedied with text NEXT to the icon, giving the button a readable purpose. But guess what? THAT SHIT AIN'T COMMON ENOUGH.
Here's a good example for you; cars. I am familiar with cars, but there's some fucking icons that I can't even figure out. And imagine if you aren't familiar with cars? That's what happens all the time; there's a hundred unused buttons on a car's interior these days because painted upon them is an icon, and only an icon! And who the hell cares enough to take out the manual and finger through it until you find that specific icon. In my experience, almost nobody.
Let's bring it back to software. It's the most overlooked UX sin to have icons without labels or some sort of describing text. As programmers, you and me have seen and can instantly recognize thousands of icons. But to get the typical user's experience, load up a complex program like Blender (assuming you aren't familiar with it yet) and see if you can tell me what all of the icons mean. Or don't, here's a screenshot from Blender 2.8 Beta. None of these icons have any labels.
Fucking frustrating, isn't it?
Don't rely on tooltips! Nobody wants to hover over every fucking icon and wait for it to pop up just to find what they're fucking looking for! Don't forget that a lot of users DON'T EVEN KNOW THEY EXIST! (This number isn't shrinking as fast as you'd expect with the newer generations, because many of the newer generations use touch devices where tooltips don't exist at all)
There's my UX rant. Remember that users are afraid to click things which they don't know what they do. For the most positive user experience, give users something to read; a way to understand what the fuck is going on without experimenting, and without waiting for the tooltip to appear.
29 -
I was laid off right before Christmas because my manager would not give me any work (bully.. possibly discrimination). I asked for work to do for 2 weeks, even coming up with things to contribute on my own. My contributions were rejected and the lead developer agreed with me that it was fucked up but did nothing. The little work that I was given was always completed above standard and the lead dev had made comments praising my self tasked contributions but each rejection I was told it would be shelved for version 1.2.
Finally fed up, feeling as though I was being completely ignored, I told the lead dev I was going home half day early if there was nothing for me to do. The next day the CTO fired me and even lied to my recruiter telling him that I had not shown up for work for 3 days (easily disproven).
It's now the first of the year, probably not the best time to be looking for a new job, and my current outlook is that I am not going to be able to pay my rent at the end of the month.
My motivation has diminished, my confidence is gone. Job prospects are few. I don't know how to proceed.9 -
One of my colleague is in trouble... He yelled "I don't give a fuck " in a zoom meeting. He told me he thought his mic was muted.
No is not. You fucked up.9 -
I Quit,
Finally I quit.
This feels good after the countless red flags I raised to management and wishful thinking that this time things will be different. For the past year!
This time I lost the optimistic approach and got myself a couple of interviews, thinking, I'm in this for the long haul, could be 6 months could be a year, evantually I will succeed. and what do you know? It works, I can still pass those.
Then I set down with myself and thought, should I come to managment before signing the contract? Giving another chance for a real change? The answer was a resounding Hell No!
So, yea, if you are in a tough position. Don't give up, think long term, and who knows that "long term" might just be a month.3 -
New job today, here is my start so far:
coworker: Hi, first you have to set up your lamp project..
me: Good, let's do it.. Please give me the repo git URL
coworker: here is everything, but.... the database is on MySQL.
me: ok, did you have any TeamSQL or something to track this?
coworker: nop.
me: check the database and see the whole file size is 4GB.... Checking the file on plain .txt i see the problem WORDPRESS.
So far to import this file on my LAMP i use Bigdump script and works like a charm.
coworker: Take it easy dude, it's your first day. You can do this task in a few days, don't rush it.
me: :/7 -
I've been pleading for nearly 3 years with our IT department to allow the web team (me and one other guy) to access the SQL Server on location via VPN so we could query MSSQL tables directly (read-only mind you) rather than depend on them to give us a 100,000+ row CSV file every 24 hours in order to display pricing and inventory per store location on our website.
Their mindset has always been that this would be a security hole and we'd be jeopardizing the company. (Give me a break! There are about a dozen other ways our network could be compromised in comparison to this, but they're so deeply forged in M$ server and active directories that they don't even have a clue what any decent script kiddie with a port sniffer and *nix could do. I digress...)
So after three years of pleading with the old IT director, (I like the guy, but keep in mind that I had to teach him CTRL+C, CTRL+V when we first started building the initial CSV. I'm not making that up.) he retired and the new guy gave me the keys.
Worked for a week with my IT department to get Openswan (ipsec) tunnel set up between my Ubuntu web server and their SQL Server (Microsoft). After a few days of pulling my hair out along with our web hosting admins and our IT Dept staff, we got them talking.
After that, I was able to install a dreamfactory instance on my web server and now we have REST endpoints for all tables related to inventory, products, pricing, and availability!
Good things come to those who are patient. Now if I could get them to give us back Dropbox without having to socks5 proxy throug the web server, i'd be set. I'll rant about that next.
http://tapsla.sh/e0jvJck7 -
My dad got a new phone over the weekend and asked me to help him set it up (TL;DR his IPhone broke, he likely cussed out someone on the phone and now he's on android).
Setting up his bank app, I asked for his password (I somehow knew asking a 80+ year old man password questions wouldn't end well)
<pulls a card out of his wallet>
Dad: "Here you go."
Me: "This is your business card?"
Dad: "Yep. Password is at the bottom. That way I never forget it."
Me: "Jeez dad, you shouldn't have your bank's password on a business card. You don't give these out to people, do you?"
Dad: "Sometimes. Hell, they won't know what that is. Its just a bunch of nonsense."
Luckily the password didn't work. He had to reset it when his IPhone messed up and didn't remember what he changed the password to.6 -
Commit Message Part2:
6528fff Code was clean until manager requested to fuck it up
241b35f Who knows WTF?!
4381a32 Argh! About to give up :(
c3bf1a9 more debug... who overwrote!
2d68d6d Fixed a bug cause Maciej said to
b112c1a This branch is so dirty, even your mom can't clean it.
bb456d4 Shit code!
4878b46 Copy-paste to fix previous copy-paste
e2c7e87 A fix I believe, not like I tested or anything
f56109f derpherp
e4b8f4c formatted all
3691208 I'm just a grunt. Don't blame me for this awful PoS.
0888b69 just checking if git is working properly...
62741aa I'm too old for this shit!
0735196 COMMIT ALL THE FILES!
09caccf I CAN HAZ PYTHON, I CAN HAZ INDENTS
1e1cda8 giggle.
ab70bde Fixed errors
934436d Now added delete for real
5f84e30 My bad
99baff8 CHRIS, WE WENT OVER THIS. C++ IO SUCKS.
953473d final commit.
f0c3b57 Just committing so I can go home
4e5ce4e yolo push
deb4e3b I CAN HAZ PYTHON, I CAN HAZ INDENTS
710c06a Commit committed....
3c45e67 it is hump day _^_
4487788 Committing in accordance with the prophecy.
bf86e7e This solves it.
4804f68 FONDLED THE CODE
051d42e REALLY FUCKING FIXED5 -
Fuck you Xiaomi for creating MIUI, damn it's so bloated with non-removable adware to the level of extreme annoying. It Keeps popping up ads from creating a Folder to Playing a music.
Look at that screenshot. It even serve an ad in built in cleaner app, like What the fuck man?! For real? I already disable the serve ads option. But it keeps turning on.
I even messing with the Permission settings, doesn't even help.
I REALLY WANT TO MOVE TO LINEAGE OS SO BAD, but the warranty is on duration. I don't want to void it.
God, give me a patience for another 7 month.
24 -
Stop fooling yourself by thinking that the hurry & pressure will eventually go away if you work overtime & stretch yourself to heroics weekly. They won't, and they never will (and even shouldn't). Focus on building sustainable habits that propel you towards your goals day by day, and don't give up until you're where you want to be. Period.2
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so, I hate my job, they give me many tasks (many of tasks are not on my field) with no trainings and no time, plus a salary that is not that good.
I get angry, so I talked with the boss about leaving yhe company.
Well, our discussion ended up by convincing me to stay with the double of the salary.
So, I accepted the offer.
Don't know whether it's the right decision or not..9 -
Recently I've been working on a side project and I've been working on it a lot over the last week, with lots of late nights.
My girlfriend said to me the other day, "do you not wanna give it a rest for a bit, you'll be starting your new job soon, you'll get fed up of it".
I then explained to her that, programming is on of those few careers where you'll continue to do programme and do side projects, even after a full day of it, and I couldn't imagine it any other way.
I can't wait to start work.. but then I also don't wanna lose out on project time 🙁4 -
Two years ago: company exec (Mac fan) buys a Surface Pro to show off our .NET application to customers as he travels. Hands it to me (I build releases) and I iron out a few Win 8 bugs since we'd always used Win 7 before. Get it set up, get to like the device a little, he takes it home... and returns it within 24 hours because he didn't mesh well with Windows. (Again, Mac user.)
8 months later he buys a Surface Pro again. I install our latest release, verify that everything is working as expected with hardware we normally don't use, and give him a controlled setup that will just work when he's at a customer site. Once again, he returns the Surface within 24 hours because he can't get used to Windows.
At least we verified Windows 8 compatibility, I guess.1 -
Currently i have a small web dev project and i set up a live preview website so he cant see it developing and This literally Just happened
Client : hey, are you currently working on my website?
Me : Yes on my computer and working on it, can i help you with something?
C: yeah just a little bit, that logo on the top left are just a bit squeezed in size and stay like that since 5 days ago and it's bothering me, can you fix it?
Me : nah, its just a simple thing. give me a sec and try reload--
C: why is your voice echoing? Don't tell me you are coding in the bathroom
Me: ummm.. No... I guess...? (I Am)
C: 🤣
Me: sorry 😅4 -
"we use cookies to give you a better experience on our site"
A better experience? Really?
It looks like you're using more than 100 external parties for whatever fucking reason. It is nearly impossible to disallow these, except for some stuff like analytics, which I don't like since it includes mass surveillance parties like Google and Facebook, but I'd at least, to some extent, understand that better.
But, the amount of dark pattern here is staggering and this kind of 'consent' you're using wouldn't, in a million years, hold up under the GDPR.
You know what would be a better experience? No tracking and no ads.
Go fuck your better experience (would that be a better sex experience....?)4 -
I think I've got a working searx instance which I'd open up for the public.
NOTE: I cannot prove that I don't store anything because for that you'd need root access to the server which I won't give obviously. If you're not comfortable with that, just don't uses it.
I still have to do something for ip address logging anonymising or stripping, though. (nginx + CSF provided enough abuse prevention).
Tips on that?29 -
//begin midnight rant
THATS IT, I AM PISSED OFF NOW ABOUT THIS SNAPCHAT SHIT!!!
I DON'T GIVE A FUCK !!!
I DIDN'T GIVE A FUCK WHEN SNAP CHAT WAS INVENTED
I DIDN'T GIVE A FUCK WHEN WATSAPP COPIED ITS FEATURE(yeah I haven't seen your pathetic story)
AND I ALSO DONT GIVE A FLYING FUCK ABOUT THE SHIT ITS GOTTEN INTO NOW.
as a guy who is allergic to people I stay the fuck away from such apps.
but for God's sake get real u shit heads... Uninstalling an app is not an achievement worth bragging about( there is a drag and drop interface for it in ur Android phone)
Here is a guy who started his own company when he graduated from college and is providing employment to 100s of ppl and ur going to put that at risk just because your fragile ego was hurt because of "poor country " comment fuck u do your research that comment was made in 2015 when a monthly 1gb 3g internet would burn a hole in your pocket
Go screw yourselves u brain dead pieces of shit if u r so worked up about being called a poor country then start a company and provide jobs for the people who are struggling(why would you when uninstalling an app is so much easier).
Any one with 300 mg of common sense would have realize that the video would have difficulty in buffering in your slow ass 2g internet pack in your phone in 2015 when Jio sim was not yet introduced.
People like you are the reason I wish the super villains would win at the end of sifi movies.
I hope God(if there is one and if ever he decides to give a fuck) would give the guys who built this app the strength to get through this shit storm
PEACE OUT
//End of mid night rant11 -
So... Some fake accounts on Twitter claimed to be Elon Musk and to give shitloads of Bitcoin to those who sent a little amount first. They stole... Wait for it... 180 grand.
That's basically your everyday 419 scam. Existing since before the internet, done with the names of Gates, Buffet, Bush, Obama...
They say "the big bad evil criminals and the poor little innocent victims" I say natural selection. Sorry, in those lion vs gazelle scenarios I always thought that it was fair, no matter how it went.
Just when did humanity get so brainless? Have we always been, is the internet just a catalyst for stupidity?
Just why the fuck must I be an infosec sheepdog instead of a wolf? Man, I could live the life, drink beer and smoke herb while working... Get up at 12, don't give a shit, no boss, no taxes, no social security payments that I don't see jack shit from, and the pay would be better to.
Damn.12 -
Taking IT classes in college. The school bought us all lynda and office365 accounts but we can't use them because the classroom's network has been severed from the Active Directory server that holds our credentials. Because "hackers." (The non-IT classrooms don't have this problem, but they also don't need lynda accounts. What gives?)
So, I got bored, and irritated, so I decided to see just how secure the classroom really was.
It wasn't.
So I created a text file with the following rant and put it on the desktop of the "locked" admin account. Cheers. :)
1. don't make a show of "beefing up security" because that only makes people curious.
I'm referring of course to isolating the network. This wouldn't be a problem except:
2. don't restrict the good guys. only the bad guys.
I can't access resources for THIS CLASS that I use in THIS CLASS. That's a hassle.
It also gives me legitimate motivation to try to break your security.
3. don't secure it if you don't care. that is ALSO a hassle.
I know you don't care because you left secure boot off, no BIOS password, and nothing
stopping someone from using a different OS with fewer restrictions, or USB tethering,
or some sort malware, probably, in addition to security practices that are
wildly inconsistent, which leads me to the final and largest grievance:
4. don't give admin priveledges to an account without a password.
seriously. why would you do this? I don't understand.
you at least bothered to secure the accounts that don't even matter,
albeit with weak and publicly known passwords (that are the same on all machines),
but then you went and left the LEAST secure account with the MOST priveledges?
I could understand if it were just a single-user machine. Auto login as admin.
Lots of people do that and have a reason for it. But... no. I just... why?
anyway, don't worry, all I did was install python so I could play with scripting
during class. if that bothers you, trust me, you have much bigger problems.
I mean you no malice. just trying to help.
For real. Don't kick me out of school for being helpful. That would be unproductive.
Plus, maybe I'd be a good candidate for your cybersec track. haven't decided yet.
-- a guy who isn't very good at this and didn't have to be
have a nice day <3
oh, and I fixed the clock. you're welcome.2 -
I don't think I could give the best advice on this since I don't follow all the best practices (lack of knowledge, mostly) but fuck it;
- learn how to use search engines. And no, not specifically Google because I don't want to drag kids into the use of mass surveillance networks and I neither want to promote them (even if they already use it).
- try not to give up too easily. This is one I'm still profiting from (I'm a stubborn motherfucker)
- start with open source technologies. Not just "because open source" but because open source, in general, gives one the ability to hack around and explore and learn more!
- Try to program securely and with privacy in mind (the less data you save, the less can be abused, compromised, leaked, etc)
- don't be afraid to ask questions
-enjoy it!7 -
I am quitting my job in the next couple of weeks. I don't even have a job lined up. I can't deal with doing Design work as a developer when you have a whole ass design team. Like what the fuck. Then I nearly do development. Oh and your gonna bitch at me when I mess up in design, then threaten to fire me? Well you can shove that shit all up your entire ass. Fuck this Job. I am doing my own thing. I don't care if I become homeless cause Fuck I'll be more happier I did that then be at this concentration camp. I am gonna live my life and own. Cause fuck everything corporate Jobs is fucking life sucking. Please Fire me. I GIVE NO FUCKS ANYMORE. Sick of being depressed and stressed. I want to be a real developer!!!! argghhhhhhhhhhhh9
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This one's for all the SysAdmins out there.
About 4 years ago I was asked to take over a dental offices systems administration (~20 machines) after their previous guy had allowed their servers RAID 1 to fail and hadn't done any updates or general maintenance. (please take note this office is my parents dental office).
I since have been recovering from his poor configuration and setup by instating an active directory environment and installing up to date software as well as updating machines on the domain to Windows 10 since windows 7 is no longer supported. I have also been properly licensing everything.
My bosses (my parents) are annoyed with this because "it's more expensive" and "it's too complicated we don't know how to manage it" and I don't know how to explain to them that they aren't fucking systems admins. They asked why they could do it before and I tried to explain that now it's secure and things need to be rolled out on the network level. They had every user running full local admin on every workstation plus the server.
Some people don't fucking understand that just because it's simple doesn't make it a good fucking idea. And because it's cheap doesn't mean it will always be (just wait till Microsoft audits you).
Oh and they also don't understand fucking CAL licensing and refuse to pay for gsuite for all their staff who use it. Instead they just have two gsuite accounts and give everyone the fucking password.
I'm going to have an aneurysm5 -
See, the problem with University students beginning programming is that they think that they're the hottest shit just because they know how to open cmd.exe. Since I'm a mentor, I have to give them pro tips while helping them through problems. I can't count the amount of times I've repeated "solve the problem on a notebook, write down how you should approach it before you begin typing your code, otherwise you'll end up spending more time debugging." They don't like to listen, cuz they're the next Zuckerberg. The following day I get a bunch of emails asking why their code doesn't work.2
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What's up with employers asking to give them a pay expectation? I don't fucking know just tell me how much you are willing to pay for god sake28
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I absolutely hate software that throws error message boxes that look identical to their "please enter new password" message box.
User called and said they needed their password reset. I give them a temp pin and tell them to press ok to the prompt and then put new password in. She says it is still saying invalid pin. This goes on for 10 minutes. I hang up and try on my laptop. Works fine. Then it hits me.
The message boxes look the same. Have the same width and height and shitty little yellow triangle with ! In the middle. The only difference between them is the text in size 9 font.
Gotta read people...cause sometimes the people developing your software assume you can. And to all the software people out there....end users don't want to fucking read.4 -
When your specs simply won't run new code no matter what you do, non-conditioned (and unmodified) calls don't get called, and 2+2 somehow equals Q, you know it's time to give up and restart the simulation by going to bed.
Except it's early afternoon and the project deadline is tonight. 😔
Back to debugging reality.11 -
Devs are known to give up quickly especially beginners...all I can say to them is..
...there is nothing like smooth mountains, you have to go through the ragged edges and valley's to get to the top...
Don't stop Coding... and dont give up.1 -
Idiots. Idiots everywhere. The next big trend in software engineering is to take a whole bunch of idiots, give them the basic knowledge to write code, and then dedicate a whole lot of competent developers' time to either fixing errors made by those idiots, or attempting to make "safer" tools so those idiots don't screw up as easily.4
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Customer: *brings in laptop and printer* My internet has been terrible lately, so this printer hasn't been working very well as a wireless printer. Could you fix it?
Me: Well, it wouldn't help much because it would be hooked up on our network, so when you take it home it won't work on yours.
Customer: I don't understand...
Me: *thinks for a second* okay, so it's like you have two streams of water. Whatever you do in the first stream doesn't effect the second stream of water.
Customer: I still don't understand....
Me: Never mind. Just go home and give us a call. We'll be able to help you better that way.
Customer: Okay, thanks!
Coworker: You can't cross the streams, Rider!2 -
I'd say one of the best advice a dev gave me, was that, I should not write duplicate code, but rewrite these parts to a single function.
And another one: If you use specific values in the code, instead of putting it in multiple places, assign it to a variable at one place and use the variable later on.
These advices sound quite trivial, but I think every beginner should learn these as eary as possible.
Boiiii have I seen shitty code from people who don't give a hobo's ass about maintainable code.
Be a good coder.
Write for quality, not quantity.
Care about your successor.
Thank you.
If not, I will fucking find you, fill your guts with napalm and light you up alive on a rusty pole while laughing hysterically.1 -
We made a simple SMS application - when there is alert in a building, SMS is sent to specific range of numbers, based on the alert type. After a month we received invoice of approx. 10K € from the client, my colleague was supposed to pay
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
After checking the logs and running tests on module, we found out it was not our fault, client then told us he played with SIM-card while module was sending SMS and somehow he managed to fu*k up. I still don't get it, partially.. Mobile service provider doesn't give a sh!t about sending tons of SMS/hour? No warning, nothing..
Ahh.. Clients, right?7 -
Me 2 days ago :
"I have applied to so many places, and did lots of interview for my internship. Still no result so far. Maybe I need to take some odd jobs to cover my bills while I improve my coding skills. Rent and food need to be paid, you know.
But I will keep applying to at least 40 companies before I change my strategy"
Me today :
"OMFG, they offered me a position despite my very bad interview!!"
🤩
So whoever is still looking for a job out there, don't give up man... We are in this together.👍👍3 -
The other day a non-programmer colleague asked me:
"How do you know what to type in, like, did you write all of that?"
As I responded, he asked me another question; "but how do you know wuat to type".
I use to have those same thoughts years ago.
It occurred to me that through constant bugs, errors, bad (team) projects and failures that its become second nature, like breathing.
So, as an experienced developer to people just learning the craft and juniors. Don't give up on your collabs, don't be disheartened by group projects, don't be discouraged by your peers who seemingly try to make your life harder.
Take it as an experience to better yourself and teach them something.
These are the experiences that will make you a better developer.1 -
YouTube. Hate and love for it just like I would for an abusive partner.
Ads!
Wanna build a website with Wix? Fuck no!
Wanna manage WordPress over SSH? Fuck no!
.. well I kind of do but a turd remains a turd regardless of how it's maintained. WordPress can go die from a torture as long as the time everyone has wasted on it loading already. So no, I don't give a flying fuck about WordPress' new interface.
Wanna buy a new Samsung phone despite just having bought a OnePlus already? YOUTUBE, HOW ABOUT YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF AND YOUR SHITTY ALGO?!!
Quality videos though, so many engineering videos and all for free. How amazing is that? I quite like them.
But if I try to like a video and particularly the fucking comments on it, don't you fucking dare putting your fat fingers 1 pixel next to the like button, because then obviously you want to reply to the comment and have a pop-up with the whole comment and all its replies, and an automatically popped up text input field, just so you have to tap back 2 times just to try liking the bloody comment again. Rinse and repeat that 2 times at best, 5 times at worst. What's not to like, right?!
God fucking dammit. At least now I know why those random mentions without any meaningful other text are there in most comment sections. Usability over 9000!!!10 -
If you are completely new to coding, no problem at all! All of the concepts are fully explained throughout the exploration. Just keep in mind that it might be tough and frustrating and times. But don't give up! Coding isn't always easy, but it sure is fun when you get it right.
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You can't put a fucking login wall when I try to unsubscribe from your newsletter, you fucking asshole.
The reason I want to unsubscribe is because I don't fucking care anymore, which means I don't remember my password, and can't login and unsubscribe because you, fucking bastard, made a not working password recovery just to let me give up and never unsubscribe.
It's been 3 years… leave me alone.9 -
TLDR; i wrote recursive compression with random algorithm to fuck up some lazy ass girl.
one day, unknown classmate told me she has a family reunion and cannot do his programming assignment which will be collected next day in the morning, so she ask me to do it. i say i need to put a price tag to it because i want to buy a new RasPi --i don't know her either so i don't feel bad about it. i told her i need $20 and after some bargaining it settled at $15. i work on it about 3 hours and told her it's finished and send her demo video as a proof. she happy with the result. and will come to my house later that night to get the source code. at night, she came, and give me only $8 bucks, of course i get mad, with every arguments she throws at me i resist to give her the source code. but since i tired enough to get into a longer arguments i accept the 8 bucks i go upstairs to get the source code. but instead of giving her the actual source code; i wrote a quick script to do 50 compress source code folder recursively with random compression algorithm--sometimes gzip sometimes lzma. and give her the final 50 times compressed source code. EAT SHIT MOTHERFUCKER10 -
Who are the people who are pushing for phones, laptops and desktops to be even thinner? Do they actually exist?! Or are that mythical creatures invented by Apple engineers so they can get paid to invent new stuff?
"Yeah, we need to invent a new keyboard design as customers are complaining how fat our pro laptops are."
I don't think I've looked at a laptop built in the last decade and wondered how I'll carry it with my tiny frame.
Just give me a Mac Pro that is a solid chunk of aluminum with a removable drive and access to the RAM. It'll look fine and it's going to sit quietly on my desk. I promise not to move it without hiring at least two men with appropriate safety equipment.
I want someone to stand up at an Apple keynote and say, "We made this thicker---you're welcome."13 -
I provide hosting for my clients. About 3 months ago I discovered that the hosting company that I'd been using had been swallowed up by EIG, which explained why the tech support had gone downhill.
So, I jumped to another hosting company. Same shit different company!
Apparently the fact that my browsers sit at "connecting" for up to 30 seconds, and I get a "could not connect to" message half the time while I'm trying to fucking work on a deadline is the fault of some plug-in in a WordPress installation!
Oh yeah? Why then does this shit happen when I'm working on a pure html/css site?
Why then did it start happening after they "updated" my shared server?!
Oh, but the bastards suggest that I buy Cloudflare or pay for more space!
You fuckers made my work take 3 times as long, and you made an important migration fail!
Network places make mistakes. We all do. That's cool. Fucking own up to it, talk to me like a techie, and DON'T TRY TO BLAME IT ON ME OR MY TOOLS!
Fuck you! I think I'm gonna give Google Cloud a try, and do this shit myself!7 -
As a developer, I'm fed up with companies that expect us to work miracles in impossible timelines. We're not wizards, we're not magicians, we're not even superheroes. We're human beings who need time to develop quality software.
It's frustrating to be given a project with a deadline that's completely unrealistic. It's even more frustrating when the same company that gave us the deadline is unwilling to give us the resources we need to meet it.
And let's not forget about the endless meetings, emails, and phone calls that eat up our valuable time. We need to code, not attend endless meetings that never seem to accomplish anything.
And don't get me started on the non-technical people who think they know more about coding than we do. Just because you know how to use Microsoft Excel doesn't make you an expert on software development.
It's time for companies to start treating developers with the respect we deserve. We're not just code monkeys, we're skilled professionals who can create amazing things when given the right tools and resources. So stop treating us like we're disposable and start investing in us. Trust me, it will pay off in the long run.9 -
First website with React JS:
After a month of studying on React I am finally building a commercial website with it. When I started learning React with redux and react router it felt so unnecessarily complex.
But trust me guys, all it takes is patience. Once you learn it creating a Web app is a breeze. And everything eventually makes so much sense. I'm so glad that I didn't give up and if you in the same position , DON'T GIVE UP. You'll eventually realise how amazing react is.9 -
So, you may know this already...But fuck CNET once again! Don't get me wrong, even if I loved the auto-playing video ads I would still be angry af. The site loads with a decent layout at first, but then in a second it changes and all I get is a pile of shit broken because of some <sarcasm>really great</sarcasm> CSS.
P.S. Yeah, I know it's probably my ad blocker killing something that is vital for the site to keep it's shape, but I don't care about that at all. I'll never give it up. (Or let it down, for that matter)
9 -
Me as a mobile app developer trying to add a button to a page of a .Net website:
So, what do i need to do?
Web developer:
Oh that's easy. You need to edit that template which produces html, add an event in there that will call a javascript function, which is in a .js file, which is generated from a typescript file. Than you should give that button a style. Simply by opening up that .less file here and adding a class which will be translated to css later. In that c# file over there you add a bundle reference which contains the css and js files, but before that, they must be minified. In that other c# file, you add a controller that handles your button.
Aaand... take care of new js features and css features. Most browsers don't support them. Those cool C#7 features you love so much... not in this project. Our build servers don't support C#7. Those new features are evil anyway.
😭5 -
Sort of !dev
I can't do school anymore. I get so many panic attacks. I was shaking the entire time I was writing my essay today. It's hard to focus when your brain is fucking freaking out. I'm missing deadlines, failing tests left and right.
Real talk, I'm not dumb. This was never a problem. My University fucked me up and now I can't even look at an assignment without an electric feeling and I don't know what to do.
I had a panic attack during the opening crawl of Star Wars. I had to leave the theater. My anxiety is going to give me a heart attack one of these times. I'm 18, why am I experiencing health issues like this?
School isn't done right. How could this be the intended effect?9 -
!dev
> Be me
> Birthday today, spend entire day in hospitals due to my beloved's cancer (see previous rants)
> After an entire tiring day, decide to order Chinese food from restaurant in région.
> Call, difficult to make him understand my order although being a native Belgian... After 10 minutes order placed.
> Drive to restaurant to come to pick up
> "It's 121 in total"
> "Wait you said 98"
> " No sir I did not say that"
> Ok fine I'm hungry
> We don't use debit card here ?
> Comeagain.gif
> I got 115 on me in cash.
> "Sorry sir we can't give you a discount on the order" despite advertising the discount
> "Why not? You advertising says so"
> "We haven't changed that yet."
> "So what now?"
> Guy puts back box in the back
> Ok that's clear enough for me.
Walk away, fed up.
Now I am in another restaurant, ordered the same amount-ish and got cheaper off and got even a small beverage for free while waiting!7 -
LabVIEW.
Because WHY THE ACTUAL FUCK should you want to use a visual programming language in a professional environment and pay for it.
(Other than: the manufacturer of your measurement device/power supply/electronic load/etc. has already provided a LabVIEW module so you just have, you know, 'click' your program together and be done.
No, we won't give you the documentation on how to do it properly without that piece of crap or even give you code snippets.
(If you don't feel the urge to shoot yourself in the foot, you have obviously too much time on your hands and could simply be reading the interface definitions for that particular interface. At least it's standardized, d'uh.)
Oh, and you want a lightweight application? Here comes the runtime environment! A big clunky ... thing you'll need now to start up even a simple measure-and-log-data-thing.
Well, OK, it works for the occasional Measure-and-Log-Thing. If you don't need the data too fast.
If you want to do something a bit more complex, knock yourself out, but don't ask me to debug it for you afterwards because that colourful entanglement of wires and connections and blocks is a DAMN HUGE MESS and trying to understand how it works feels like defusing a bomb in a shitty action movie.)
Never again.5 -
Being a self taught programmer ( self teaching? don't know the continuous form :P) , I get really frustrated when my friends encounter a problem and just give up , I mean come on , Google it , ask on SO , ughhhhhhhh7
-
Dear client:
You have to think this is like building a house, so you have to spend time doing some serious thinking, so you come up with a (somewhat) good vision of what you want and what could possible change in the future... let me give you an example: let's say we were building a house and we are very close to finishing it, so you come up with the great idea of putting the kitchen where the living room is, and the bathroom in the second floor where the TV room was... if that happens, then I would tell you to go fuck yourself.
See dear client... there are pipes, wiring, and all sorts of stuff you don't see, that makes a house be a house... apply the same logic to building software and we'll be on the same page more often.
PS: I appreciate your business1 -
Semi rant/ opinion
I have been wondering a bit about what my fellow devs think about adblockers
I have been using an adblocker for years.
I am guessing we got a good mix of both people who are pro and against them
I do get the site's owner point of view wanting to get a little bit of cash out of their site buts its the ad publisher that come in and royally screw things up with their garish flashy shit.
I wouldn't really mind 2-3 small static adverts on a page, little ones that don't disrupt the flow of the page or clash with the page colour scheme (i know that one is a bit far fetched but anyone who loaded up a dark page in the comfort of a darkened room only to have a big bright ad turn up in the middle of the page force them to squint ). Sadly publishers don't give a damn, their only concern is to
GRAB YOUR ATTENTION...
FLASHY FLASH FLASH MOFO!
OH AND HERE IS AN AUDIO ENABLED ONE FOR YA, GOOD LUCK MUTING IT YOU POOR SHMUCK , ONE CLICK ON THE DAMN THING WILL TAKE YOU TO THE LAND OF POP-UPS
AH YOU WANNA DOWNLOAD SOMETHING BUDDY ? AH WELL I HOPE YOU LIKE INDIANA JONES' SCENE WITH HOLY GRAIL
CUZ HERE ARE 10 DOWNLOAD BUTTONS, ONE IS THE REAL THING THE REST WILL ARE TOOLBARS
They are the biggest culprit here yet moan the loudest about adblockers.
Sort yourselves out then complain to us about ad blocking6 -
spotted a huge bug 2 days before launch. My boss was panicking and he asked. "how long more you need?!" I look at him and almost said "Don't rush art" then I swallow my saliva and said "give me 2 hours" he said ok hurry up.
yea 2 hours after i find out what went wrong2 -
!dev
I'm a very patient and calm person when it comes to coding or social events and the only thing that "triggers" me is accuracy.
You've made plans to have a small reunion and with people, you hardly meet, once or twice in a year and yet you somehow fail to show at 11:00 am in the morning which was already planned.
Now it's time to call each of you and hear out your ridiculous explanation of how you stayed up late watching Instagram videos of cute kittens and fell asleep late.
> "Oh I just woke up, I'll be there directly there in an hour, I know I promised we'll go together, but I have this thing to deal with"
> "Hey, do you know who reached till there? Are you there yet? What's the plan?" - Bitch the plan was to be there by 11 AM, 11 FUCKING AM.
> "Heyyyy, just woke up, give me an hour I'll pick you up"
Seriously this makes me sad and disappointed because I'm a man of the time. Sometimes I think they do this just to test my patience.
There is not enough time, there never was, there never will be.
With that being said my holiday is ruined and what's up with you?
> inb4 don't let others ruin your holiday10 -
!rant
Just wanted to share this beautiful development miracle. Hello Games has proved to us that it's never the end, and you can always come back to fix your mistakes as long as you don't give up on yourself. Follow your dreams motherfuckers :D
6 -
The most important skill you can have is doing things without shame.
Shamelessly stay in your bed all weekends watching PewDiePie, never brushing your teeth, eating Doritos from under your pillow and peeing into empty Mountain Dew bottle if you feel like doing it.
Shamelessly spend your vacation sitting in the toilet with a laptop browsing reddit.
Shamelessly cut your product in half and ship it if you don't feel like perfecting it.
Shamelessly admit that you don't know something when you messed something up at work.
If you are a millennial like me, chances are your gen x parents told you that you have to be perfect / really good to succeed and to be worthy.
You know what? Fuck your parents then. Fuck my parents as well. Admitting this behavior wrong and actually giving up on living like something is always watching is the best thing you can do to your mental health.
I'm lazy. I write "any" here and there when they force me to do typescript at work. When I need a sidebar, I go and copy-paste that jquery snippet. I write like one article a month at best and I really want to say "fuck it" if I just don't feel like it.
You can always give up on everything and it's perfectly fine. This doesn't make you any kind of looser or something. You're perfectly fine.
Too bad I'm only beginning to master that.8 -
Here is what I see in industry right now.
Don't go on math but get the gist.
1. 9 of 10 developers are Web developers
2. 9 in 10 developers want to be data scientist
3. 9 out of above actually give up and start doing Web development
4. 9 in 10 developers think CS education is not necessary.
5. 9 in 10 developers want to work for Google Facebook and Microsoft.
6. 9 in 10 developer don't make it to above companies.
7. 9 in 10 developers think design and test are important but never do it.
8. 9 out of 10 developers don't want to code after 5 years and just want to exit industry to non technical roles.
9. 9 out of 10 developers don't get rants and dev memes posted here.
What's your take on this7 -
Please, oh please, tell me there's an exception for murdering people using their phone in speaker mode right in the middle of an open space.
Please ... I feel like it should count as public service and be rewarded ..
I'm trying to work here, it don't give the slightest flying fuck about the latest crap you dare to call code and how it fucked up your whole application.5 -
Clients that ask you to build X and then when you ask about said details to know everything up front, you get a deer in the headlights look.
I get it, not knowing right away is fine, but 5-6 months later and still "not knowing", being absolutely lazy with no responses to questions or just dumping the work to me to figure out from whatever source material you got it from and force me to crunch to save your ass isn't fun for me and I really don't give a shit about how much praise you give me publicly for the job I did.1 -
It's cool.
I have less than four weeks before I have to have my project production ready
But why not make me waste my time in useless web based fucking trainings for bullshit HR issues I'll never deal with.
"Don't give gifts of more than $100 to potential clients!" Shut fuck up I don't work with clients.
Piss off and let me do my job.1 -
Am I the only one that thinks it's extremely fucking stupid that the software engineering industry is simultaneously experiencing a "shortage of talent" and maintaining the same ATS that filters legitimate talent just because the resume doesn't fit keyword specifications?
We see it every day. People with years of experience that should never be allowed to touch important code. People with little to no experience that learn fast and perform well. Fuck years of experience being the only thing some recruiters see.
"We generally don't hire people with less than 3 years experience" shut your fucking mouth. Ridiculous. You hire people out of college, don't lie to my face.
Oh and don't even get me started on how many people fabricate their industry experience and get interviews from it. That's what happens when recruitment patterns fail to catch up to an industry that increasingly trains people better up front, and in shorter time periods, and values skills that ATS doesn't give a shit about.
Crazy idea: make job applications test problem solving competency instead of weeding out quality candidates.
Job searching is frustrating.3 -
First it was the "set up WampServer so the client can use our database", to which I told her we should use an embedded database, to which she told me to do.
Then the "Just give the client a .jar file and install the JRE in his laptop" to wich I told her we can make a native installer, to which she fucking assigned to me.
Then the whole fucked up management thing with no design whatsoever and the "we don't need version control".
To just a few hours earlier, when she got mad because I set up a Slack for us to exchange information easily, she told me she was already mad because I shared the project by Google Drive and that she worked in security and knows the risk... AND AT THE SAME TIME, she uses Gmail to share the project.. BRILLIANT !7 -
Last week my university decided to give away old hardware to students (CPUs, displays, keyboard, mouse, speakers, printers etc.). My roommate got me this beast. I was so excited and decided to boot it up only see to GRUB error 22 :( I think the hard drives were wiped before handing it out.
I've never set up a server before and I've been trying to boot up an Ubuntu server via USB drive but it's not detecting the OS installation files. I've been searching all around to make this work but it's not fucking working. I don't have any other cables or CD drive to try something else. I want to make this work. I have exams next week and I can't stop thinking about this. Godammit
8 -
I'm so fed up of this shitty ultra-ortodox industry
I've worked on many different projects, been in many different teams. It's an ever changing industry, but, surprisingly, it's so orthodox. Dev industry nowadays have some rules, that everybody adopts them as "best practices". You have to work on pull requests, and several of your teammates have to review your shit (as if they have nothing better to do).
I'm sick of people using fucking DTOs in shitty frameworks like Laravel. Using DTOs in Laravel is like putting mustard in a fucking chocolate cake.
I'm so fed up of SPAs and node.js. I've yet so see a single SPA that handles jwt tokens correctly. I'm tired of spending hours and hours, days and days, struggling with thousandls of layers of abstractions instead of being productive and getting the shit done.
Because end customers don't give a shit about your "best practices": They have a problem and you are getting paid for it to be solved, not for spending hours and hours struggling with stupid Javascript and its crazy async nature and their crappy libraries.
Damnit. I say. Now. I now feel better. Thanks for listening :)14 -
Need to whip up a quick demo on how a site might work for an organization, so I figured I'd just use the default twentynineteen theme and customizer to get it set up.
Turns out that twentynineteen *does* *not* *have* sidebars.
Instead, all of your content is offset to the left.
And all right-floated boxes go off-margin to the right.
And this is apparently a *feature* because now you can change your sidebar on every damn page instead of setting it in one place like a good site design would dictate! (link: https://github.com/WordPress/...)
I've been trying to bite my tongue and give it a fair shot, but saying that having the only dedicated widget area in the footer and forcing you to rebuild your sidebar on every damn page you want it on is a good thing is beyond the pale stupid. If you need that level of customization on every page, you don't know what you're doing. At the very least include a sidebar and give people the option of overriding it.
And for the love of God, *don't throw the entire goddamn body content off-center claiming you're leaving space for a sidebar you're not going to provide*!1 -
alright, i give up
i'm just going to have to work the rest of my life
the government takes nearly half of everything you do anyway.
income from your saas? taxed.
risked and stressed earned profits from intraday trading? taxed.
money chilling getting interest in a savings account? taxed.
your 50+ hour work week salary? taxed.
but don't worry, houses start at an affordable 500K
🤡11 -
I feel like when I was a less experienced developer I was way more productive and undertook more complicated hobby projects.
I used to not give a fuck. Use a language I've never used before? Fuck it, let's learn it on the fly. I need to use a weird library with last commit 2 years ago? I don't care, let's import it. Make a computer vision project even though I know nothing about it and I end up just making up the techniques without reading any research? Let's make it my uni year project.
Now days I have so much doubt whenever doing anything. I always spend too much time thinking about what's the best way of doing it and doing research to see how others have done it. All of my experimentation spirit has been sucked away.3 -
I have a class that give me a final project to remaster ubuntu 14.04 and up. the lecturer suggest to use VM instead of dual booting. i do neither, purge the windows 10 and install ubuntu 16.04 and i don't regret it at all.5
-
I don't give a fuck anymore. I'm leaving this company in less than a month and I'm so fucking pissed. No matter how fast I work, I ALWAYS end up not getting PR reviews FOR WEEKS. I POSTED A PATCH FOR AN ABSOLUTE BLOCKER THAT HAS MAYBE 20 LINES AND I STILL DON'T HAVE THE FUCKING REVIEWS A WEEK LATER. WHAT THE FUCK. Not to mention that bigger feature I've been working on that blocks subsequent dev steps. It's been, what, a month? And not a single review. The fuck am I supposed to do?5
-
Jesus, using vim in browser is such a beautiful thing, thought it's pointless.
Also, FUCK managers/bosses that change their technologies for no fuckin reason.
I didn't spend 1+ month to learn .NET core, which is a fine piece of tech and you suddenly come and say that we should move to PHP because the new guys you hired are PHP devs and don't know a single line of .NET.
I DONT GIVE A FUCK.
TAKE YOUR PHP AND SHOVE IT UP TO YOUR ASS.10 -
My boss wants to be asynchronous with php. Then to render the backend async he wants to use beanstalk using python to be scalable.
I said : we can use node.js it's already asynchronous. And we don't care about the langage php python...
Boss : node.js isn't scalable, there is no security it's not good enough, it's not enough safe. I code with php since 15 years and it's better than node. To much problem in the node.js version 0.12.
OK BUT NOW WE HAVE NODEJS VERSION 6 LTS. WAKE UP. OMG I GIVE IT UP LET'S GO.5 -
Fucking jesus christ, for some reason in chromium-based browsers if you have a table that fills up to the full height of the parent using flexbox rules, if you go to print it, it will fucking
i forgor 💀
and give it a height of minimum content height. The solution is to ALSO give it height: 100%;
Google completely unhelpful (I guess it's too specific and most people don't write web services specifically made for printing out?) but luckily it only took me like 3 guesses to figure out on my own.
But I could have easily seen this completely pissing me off to the point of quitting. FireFox doesn't have this issue.
RELATED TANGENT RANT:
Why the fuck is the default to use headers, footers, margin, and no background images (colors) ?!?!?!? The default printing for browsers COMPLETELY FUCKS UP THE PRINT
God FUCKING damnit.14 -
I'm fed up with you guys ranting about what you SHOULD HAVE said, but instead just walked out, said something cowardly, or nothing at all...
For fuck sake, grow a pair and stand up for yourself! Noone else will...
I get it, this place is a nice vent, people understand, it's not face-to-face, it's easy. But the sheer number of you that had a clear chance to be grow, and ran for the door is alarming.
I also get it, it's mostly difficult to talk back to a client/boss/professor. But there's a few steps between FUCK YOUR FUCKING DIPSHIT FACE and running to the corner to post a rant here.
Find the right words. You don't have to sware, be civilized, but take a stand, present your arguments, present facts and proofs. Don't give in to their scare tactics, earn that respect you need and deserve! Then come here like a winner and share it with us.
It has become quite a tradition here to sware in all caps and then say that's what you should have said, but didn't. From now on, I'm -- these posts to give my two cents in an attempt to make this a community of winners ranting about a stupid world. Not a community of cowards ranting how world is scary.6


