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Search - "fuck you"
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Are you for real Guido/python devs?! Can we stop shoving politics into non issues just to virtue signal please?
What the fuck is next?! Oh you can't kill a process you politely put it to sleep, you can't call that machine a server anymore it might get offended now it's called a service caring electrical appliance, hey what about removing python all together after all python could be misconstrued as phallic and drive women away; I know! Let's call it Santa/elves instead of master/slave!
Fuck off! And what's that of you being akward saying server/slave terminology around black people? That's insanely racist! Who the fuck thinks all black people are descendants of slaves? Why the fuck are you racist enough to imply they can't do their job properly because (unlike you) they would be uncomfortable, you low expectations racist fuck!
You just fucked with your open source base and I really don't wanna see python going woke and then broke.
https://github.com/python/cpython/...32 -
Dear Apple,
If you were a person in the streets dying after swallowing a fish bone, I'd stop by only to KICK YOUR FUCKING HEAD REPEATEDLY INTO THE CURB!!!!
FUCK YOU for wasting my time getting my hands on an old MacBook just so I can develop in your shitty prison of an ecosystem.
FUCK YOU for wasting my time having to install officially unsupported crapOS for the hardware only in order to use your steaming pile of shit latest Xcode because it's the only way to write code for the target device.
FUCK YOU for running slower on a 2.5GHz processor with 16G of ram than the Internet did in 1995. FUCK YOU AGAIN as browsing the internet is faster than anything else on this setup. FUCKING planned obsolescence MOTHER FUCKERS!
FUCK you for the headaches with multiple different iOS versions to take into account when thinking about what should be a simple project.
FUCK YOU ESPECIALLY for just keeping the soulless simulator blank because i need a fucking mother fucking development certificate and provisioning profile to run a hello world on it.
FUCK YOU for forcing me to use 2 factor authentication to enroll on your SCAM developers program.
FUCK YOU for NOT FUCKING ALLOWING ME TO ENABLE 2 FACTOR AUTH WITHOUT REMEMBERING MY SECURITY QUESTIONS FROM 2012!!
FUCK YOU AGAIN for when I reset those through crappy crapOS THEN requiring me to FUCKING install Developer app from the shit store to enroll....
BUT FUCKING GOD DAMN FUCK YOU FOR GETTING ME TO WRITE THIS RANT BY THEN NOT ALLOWING ME TO ENROLL IN THE DEVELOPER PROGRAM THROUGH SAID APP BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE iCloud setup!!! I DON'T FUCKING WANT iCloud.... I WANT TO FUCKING MEET MY DEADLINE AND WRITE THIS APP!!!!!
JESUS WEEPS as I restart this absurdly slow crapbook in the hope that the option to sign in to iCloud will show up in settings next time....
(meanwhile I I contemplate the sisyphean absurdity of existence and how John C Lilly was probably right about the Solid State Entity grooming humanity for takeover by alien AI...)
I start to contemplate blowing out my brains instead as to sign into iCloud i need to remember some long lost code and now rinse wash and repeat mindless authentication steps OH SO VERY SECURE APPLE only to get the attached godforsaken error... i restart again as i wish the universe would restart itself...
...i begin to enjoy hitting my head against the desk as i try to understand why apple won't let me enroll in there development program... i guess it's because i'd kick their head in... after 2 hours no more... FUCK YOU APPLE TO ETERNAL INFINITE SUFFERING IN DEMONIC HELLS YOU WORTHLESS, PARASITIC, SCUMBAG ENTITY... GO CHOKE ON STEVE JOBS EXHUMED ROTTEN COCK!!! BASTARD TIME WASTING MOTHER FUCKERS!35 -
*me and a bored coworker
me: bored as hell dude.
him: i have a fun game in mind.
me: shoot.
him: *brings his keyboard
him: type the string you can type the fastest. we will time it. i will start.
him: *types his name
him: your turn.
me: Scanner scanner = new Scanner(System.in);
him: the fuck is wrong with you?16 -
Fuck it I’m posting it again because I got got by this…Again.
If this is how you write your APIs, take a number, get in line. I got some slapping to get out of my system.7 -
Dev: So how do you want this feature fixed?
Manager: It should work how it worked before.
Dev: I'm new to this feature, I don't know how it worked before or what is broken about it.
Manager: Well just make it work like it worked before.
Dev: I DONT KNOW HOW IT WORKED BEFORE THAT IS WHY I AM ASKING YOU. PLEASE TELL ME SO I CAN DO MY JOB.
Manager: Just how it worked before!
Dev: ...
Manager: ...
Dev: fuck you18 -
How the fuck did clients convince themselves they can have a developer build an Amazon, booking.com, Facebook, Airbnb or site of the sorts for 500 bucks on FUCKING WORDPRESS?!9
-
Fuck all the corporate bullshit
- We support diversity but we’re quite happy to make money in countries that don’t
- Join all our clubs so we can take photos of our staff having ‘fun’
- Let’s send our staff 10 corporate bullshit emails a day
- Let’s have as many company update meetings as possible about absolutely nothing
- We are a family
- Share how great we are on your social network
And the worst of all
- Even though you are a developer you can’t have local admin rights because of security
Fuck this, I’m done and planning my exit!!18 -
Manager: Alright, we've decided we're gonna just going to accept PayPal and also credit card checkout through PayPal in the next two days!
Dev: ...
Manager: We can achieve this timeline, right?
Dev: ...
Manager: Alright, awesome to see your motivation! Let's do it!
Dev: YOU ANSWER PHONE CALLS, TALK TO PEOPLE AND 'STRATEGIZE' ALL DAY. YOU DON'T HAVE TO RELY ON THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE USING THE APP WITHOUT ERROR. THAT'S ON ME, NOT YOU, SO JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!
Manager: ...
Dev: ...rant i love it everyone loves it great startup we are awesome we love it features without error clueless8 -
> in da zone, headphones beating, caffeine rushing through my veins, snack-stack at 75%, code and commands flowing like campaign promises, I'm one with the keyboard... I can feel it ~(◉_◉)~
roomie: Hey J! J!
me: ಠ_ಠ I'm kinda busy, what do you want?
roomie: Dude don't forget to pick up bla bla bla
me: Okay
> Headphones back on, feeling the h4ckx0r fire resurge through my gut like a majestic phoenix (not to be confused with taco tuesday gut fire)
roomie: J...J! dude also make sure bla bla bla
me: ಠ╭╮ಠ I know, you don't need to be so specific with me.
> Headphones on...about to hit play again...
roomie: Dude do you happen to know bla bla bla
(ಥ﹏ಥ)
(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻
FUCK! just tell me everything at once so I can go back to ignoring you and the irrelevant world around me!
I hate when people do this.9 -
Interviewer: I don't understand. With a resume and portfolio like yours you shouldn't be applying to companies like us. You should be setting your sights on companies like Google/Meta. You'd be bored here after everything you've done so far. I know we're offering more money than your current position but you're worth more believe me. I'm going to keep looking, and so should you. But you need to aim higher.
Dev: ...
Well fuck me I guess?21 -
If you want to go fast, work alone.
If you want to go far, work in team.
Fuck the team, I'm going fast.5 -
I fucking hate toxic positivity. Every fucking corporation pushes the notion that "lifE iS aWeSomE, wE cArE abOuT pEoPle" and other such bullshit, and when you point it out, they call you a bad, toxic person.
No, you don't care about your community, let alone the whole world. You're just trying to make people believe that spyware, wage slavery and being fired by a neural network is the norm. You're making money off of those who don't have a choice.
If you account all people, not just American white rich 1%, it turns out that for the vast majority of people life is either an uphill battle or straight up nightmare. People are working in shifts and have no time or emotional resource to spend on themselves. Most of the people can't afford a house or a flat. Even those who can still suffer from mental illnesses, to the point where there are more mentally challenged people than mentally healthy ones. The word "neurotypical" meaning "mentally healthy" is wrong.
You want nothing but to sell your stuff and earn more money off of Chinese and Indian factory workers who work 16-hour shifts. Maybe your life is great, but aggressively pushing this notion is a big, wet spit in the face of humanity.
Fuck you. Fuck your space rockets. Fuck your twitter accounts. Fuck your institutionalized exploitation of the weak. Fuck your products. Fuck your "open source". Fuck your "GDPR compliance". Fuck your offshores, your hedge funds and your tax evasion. Fuck your bailouts. Fuck your ships spilling tons of crude oil, fuck your factories, fuck your slave labor, fuck your anti-suicide nets in Chinese dormitories.
One day, because of you, our planet will become unlivable. You will hop into your fancy space rocket to go to that top-1% elite Mars colony. Nice job.
But I will pray for a solar flare to hit you and turn you and your fucking rocket into radioactive ash.21 -
Client: When will you give me an update on this feature
Me: In two weeks
Client: okay that’s fine
Client proceeds to call me everyday asking me for an update🤨🤨
Fuck you sir.4 -
Fucking companies that always look for "senior", "top 1%", "ninjas".
But to give the opportunity for someone to become one of these, God forbid, right?
Fuck you, cunts.22 -
Fuck corporate bullshit. I do the job, you pay me, the rest is pointless crap.
You are not my family, I don’t base my whole self worth on working for you and mostly I really don’t care.
I’m really not cut out for this shit.9 -
Fucking Jira!
You fucking piece of fucking shit. You're about as useful as a nacho cheese enema.
Fuck Atlassian, fuck Jira, fuck fuck fuck fuck!14 -
We aren't allowed to boil water BOIL WATER
"We have to get Climate Neutral until we decided for a plan the kitchen is closed"
FUCK YOU I JUST WANT TO ENJOY MY COFFEE WHICH I CAN'T DRINK IN MY OFFICE ANYMORE BECAUSE OF SAME BULLSHIT
I get it we have to become climate neutral but holy fuck this can't be part of the solution to not use the kitchen anymore....53 -
Windows, God damn you piece of fucking shit.
Why the fuck can't you make networking fucking easy like literally every other fucking operating system in the goddamn fucking world?
Why the fuck can't I spoof mac addresses so that I have the same IP address regardless of if I'm on a hard line or wireless?
Who in their fucking right mind thought that the pro version of Windows wouldn't need to do that?
I don't even like using you at this point, I'm forced to use you for work.
There's literally not enough explicitives that I can chain together to sufficiently convey how much I fucking hate you Microsoft. So enjoy this seizure inducing tourette's mode compilation.
Fuck shit cock piss mother fucker asshole bitch mother fucker sick and tired of your fucking shit Microsoft you fucking cuck piece of shit nobody fucking likes you they only have to use you because no fucking business in their right mind is going to spend the millions of dollars it cost to fucking switch over to fucking Mac or Linux I hope you fucking choking a bag of HIV riddled flaming dicks you fucking piece of shit.17 -
FUCK WEB3, FUCK CRYPTO, FUCK NFTS, FUCK ALL THIS PONZI ASS BIG BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK YOU WHOEVER MADE THJS!!!! THE ONLY ONES WHO PROFIT ARE NOT THE ONES WHO BUY CRYPTO OR JPEGS BUT THE ONES ON TOP OF THIS PYRAMID WHO CREATED IT!!!!! MIGHT AS WELL CODE MY OWN PYRAMID COIN/JPEG AND SELL IT TO SUCKERS!!!!!!!! FCKK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!11
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THOSE FUCKING DUMBASSES BOUGHT _THEMSELVES_ A SERVICE THAT COSTS 599 A MONTH, BUT US DEVS AREN'T ALLOWED TO USE ONE THAT COSTS 30 A MONTH?!?!?!
FUCK.
YOU!!!!!!!!
saving money my ass!!!!
the absolute insolence of these fools...
just rudely stated this in a message to the managers, let's see what weak excuse the clowns return...7 -
No one uses Git, nor any code hosting service, but I'm the Junior.
Yeah okay, fuck you and your fucking siloes.
I won't tolerate lack of version control anymore, I'll be looking for the next "professional opportunity".11 -
STUPID RAILS!
WHY CAN'T YOU JUST BUILD THE BLOODY QUERY WITHOUT DOING FANCY UNNECESSARY SUBQUERY SHIT?!
OR PUT THE LIMIT WHERE IT MAKES SENSE AND DOESN'T CAUSE MYSQL TO TELL YOU TO FUCK OFF?
WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY
THIS ISN'T HARD18 -
An unfriendly reminder: if you don’t know how to use a fucking search engine to at least try and find solutions to your problems, get your sorry ass the fuck out of here!
I reiterate: if you can’t utilise a search engine any better than the average gorilla, you’re an asswipe with no fucking right to even consider getting within miles of devs, you fucktard!6 -
Part of an honest interview :
- What is your biggest weakness?
+ Triceps femoris muscles
- Why do you want this job?
+ Earning money to buy food so that I don't die of hunger.
- How do you handle pressure?
+ By shouting the word fuck
- What are your goals?
+ Have a cheek in bed every night.
- We will be in touch.
+ you never call, do you?3 -
If you claim that you are a senior developer and you need help fixing something that you broke and your entire question is ‘Please help me fix it I don’t understand’, then go fuck yourself.6
-
Designers designed a component with a "doubleDigits" property, that changes the text size if there's two digits.
After I implement it, I get "hey it doesn't look good if I type three digits".
Fuck you.4 -
I often hear
You will be promoted as lead if you act like it or take charge
That is really stupid, there is difference between responsibly and effort.
Why would i put effort for things that i am not getting paid for ?
Fuck that6 -
Wouldn't it be amazing if Linus Torvalds just say "fuck it, fuck this controversy, fuck the CoC and all the self righteous dumbass people infecting my community!"
And just forks Linux to start a new OS? Would you support him? I bet he would have huge independent support, hell I'm poor and even I'd donate.7 -
You know what, fuck microshit to fuck town and back again.
What part of disabling "allow the computer to turn of this device to save power"
DO YOU NOT FUCKIJG UNDERSTAND!
MY FUCKING USB'S ARE GOING FUCKING MENTAL SWITCHING ON AND OFF LIKE A DRUNKEN HOBO YOU COCK FUCKS.
my week is a complete and utter shit of a week as it is, I don't need this bullshit on top of it too.
#Microsoft, fix your fucking shit already!4 -
I find smart watches so rude.
You are talking to someone and the bloody watch goes dinggg..
So the person you are talking to, stops listening, checks their smart watch, and performs whatever action they want before getting back to the conversation.
I fucking hate it. Not only you are rude to me, but also broke the chain of thought and rhythm of the conversation.
Fuck you and fuck your smart watch.
The other day I saw the office boy and the janitor wearing a smart watch. Mind you, the salaries of these folks is not more than $250 a month. Yet they have a top quality smart phone and a smart watch, where the combo usually costs more than their monthly salary.
It's important to consume and show off, than to make the bloody ends meet.
A monkey world.24 -
Holy fuck nvidia. Why the fuck you want me to login to your fucking app in order to download a fucking driver. You also want me to click a fucking link that you sent to my email for verification on every fucking login? Why on earth someone would stole my fucking nvidia account? To see which drivers I use? What the fuck nvidia? Oh wait. DO YOU DARE ASK ME TO SETUP TWO FACTOR AUTH TO SECURE MY ACCOUNT?!? What the fuck? Even if I put my credentials online no one would care to login my fucking nvidia account. Just let me download my fucking driver!6
-
Why the absolute fuck do I need to have nvidia membership to download cudnn? What evil do these mofos think people achieve with free access to a fucking programming tool?
Jesus on a bike! I nag about open science and all I end up with is always these spying morons, who purposefully disable scientists. Fuck!
If👏you👏need👏my👏info,👏then it's👏not👏free.👏17 -
I'm in internship, why the fuck am I the one explaining them how to use git, Android studio????? Why am I the project manager?????? I'm supposed to learn from you not the opposite. Fuck this monkey.15
-
I hate corporate America devs that say “connect with you later today” like the fuck u think I am? A USB port?21
-
Let's start 2023 !
WHO THE FUCK imagined that having language like YAML is a good idea ??
Fuck you and your spaces. No editor produce any decent errors messages except "Your spaces are wrong".
When you edit an Azure debops pipeline, it's just 5 min ti do thing, 35 minuites to figure ou where to add/remove spaces.
NO, I WILL NOT read 25 pages of documentation to add a single step into pipeline.
Fuck YAML !29 -
I love when employers reach out to you like desperate fuck boys on a dating app.
Tell me more about your “amazing” benefits package that’s indistinguishable from any other, your PTO that is as “unlimited” as my phone plan, and the empty mustard packets you acquired in series Z funding.
I’ve got all day to watch your dance play out its milky chance. -
Manager: Dev, you will submit to my leadership and surrender all common sense to agree with what I say or face consequences.
Dev: Manager, Fuck you!2 -
!dev
This may be a petty rant, but It's been grinding my gears for a few months now... I fucking hate ads, it's starting to be incredibly ridiculous. You start a video... 2 ads... you watch for 2 minutes, another 2 ads (and no, adblock isn't a solution, that only works on PC, not devices)?!!! You start an App... ads, you listen to music... ads... you go to google... ads, you click a website... ads... you look out of your window... ads... you walk down the street... ads... ads.. ads...
Seriously, what the fuck have we done?!! As a society we fucked up so badly... Look, no matter how many times you offer me an ad for a furniture, I'm not going to buy a fucking furniture on just any random day. You are completely wasting my already limited time... If you don't have any ads to show me, then don't show me ads, fuck you, you fucking piece of shit software... How is it that it used to be enough to click away one static, non-intrusive ad, but now 6-8 15-20 second ads, popups and intrusive, mid-content ads are the norm?! And then a piece of shit like MoviePass DARES, FUCKING DARES, To work on some sort of camera-enabled check that you actually LOOK at the ads?!!!! ARE YOU FUCKING SHITTING ME?! WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE YOU RETARDED PIECE OF BLACK MIRROR SHIT, FUCK OFF WITH THIS BRAINWASHING BULLSHIT, I'M ALLERGIC TO IT, FUCK ALL OF THIS.
I fucking promise that any software I'll make will be either free and open source, or paid only by alternative means, no ads, not ever. I will never fucking add to this retarded bullshit. Never fucking ever will I lower myself on a level where I need to actively waste the time and psyche of thousands or millions of people to get money. Fucking hell.... As if the world doesn't suck enough already, we treat humans as cattle, and It's pissing me off... In the past I used to just delete any app that annoyed me with ads, but what the fuck do I do about youtube since it's the de-facto content source on the internet? And worse, my friends and family watch youtube.. even if I avoid it that doesn't mean the problem is solved... There needs to be an alternative, and paying subscriptions for every single fucking service on the web isn't a solution. Even worse with the current economy... I'd rather eat real food, than buy shit like premium on ShitTube, Fuckify, all the random news website I might read and every app or game I start once every two months... Shit like ad-less premium accounts aren't giving me an alternative, just a way to shoot myself in the foot longterm...
Godbless everyone that releases open source software, apps, tools, websites and such. I hope to god decentralized alternatives to youtube need to happen and not in the web3 way, because that's also retarded...
Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Shit, Fuck Shit, Piss, Cocksucker, Motherfucker, Retards, Fucking absolutely disgusting pieces of shit... ... alright, I got it out of my system, but It's gonna be right back the next time YouTube forces me to look at 20 seconds of something I already skipped 48 times today...59 -
These moronic idiots wrote a scientific paper, and did not bother explaining the acronym they've used. 😐
https://sciencedirect.com/science/...
How am I supposed to know which fuckin CART it means? Huh? Who the fuck told you that was acceptable? Also fig 3 can get fucked too.
Your approach seemed interesting for all of two whole fuckin seconds before you fucked it with your unscientific explanation of your results in SIXTEEN FUCKING DIGITS after zero. Fuck you and fuck this and fuck that. Am I clear?
... The straw that broke the camel's back. 😑16 -
Why do managers always want to fucking "discuss"? If you had literally a first-grader's education in basic electronics, you could define tasks and tickets by yourself and not have to fumble around all day and fuck it up,13
-
Ok, YOU fuck up THREE (!) times, and send me new text for the app, each time saying its '100% finished, no errors' and expect me (each iteration) to do it IMMEDIATELY
Why don't you go fuck yourself, do your damn job, do it right, and THEN contact me instead of running around like an childish preschooler with a pair of scissors4 -
If refactoring scares you, fuck off out my team.
If you keep code in the codebase simply because it took you ages to write it, fuck off out of my team.
Some people must be wishing pain and suffering upon themselves and their colleagues.8 -
My teammate seems to have a knack for CC’ing my boss when he thinks I broke something. Fuck you a-hole.8
-
I find it annoying when non-tech savvy people criticize the Parler devs for using AWS because "it's Amazon they had it coming", I don't know the devs or company behind that website, I've never used it, but wtf man do you have any idea what's involved in building, deploying and maintaining a platform like that or any other similar? ffs you would barely be able to write an HTML blog by yourself and you dare judge devs for using AWS. fuck off.
I agree with the sentiment, it sucks, if my platform was removed from AWS I probably would keep it that way because I don't have the money to afford the hardware nor am I somewhere that's readily available and that's what is really sad it would suck that just because Amazon doesn't like you or you don't have the influence to fight it you and your userbase can go fuck off. Very bad precedent, it is discouraging.68 -
Urgh, fucking excel!
Why the fuck can't you handle a few thousand calculations you dumb ass piece of shit.
I am this close to... fuck, it crashed. 🤦♂️
I fucking give up.
Time to strap this data to a DB instead.rant formulas are great they said useless pile of shit clowns shit better then you you had 1 job stop fucking crashing excel7 -
Imagine being on vacation and the first notification you see on your phone in the morning is from your colleague on Teams:
"Hey! Are you available for a call despite the vacation?"
Fml and fuck me for being too kind to even spend time answering his questions instead of ghosting him.16 -
I recently learnt that even chrome and Firefox use Webkit instead of their own engines in the iPad, because Apple requires so. So you can not use any alternative browser. You can not install oder versions of Safari as well. You can not open any browser-console or whatever. What the serious fuck.
I've hated Apple for my life but now I have even reasons!5 -
For the first time I am feeling like.... I hate my job.
Agile and Scrum can be fucked, but at least there is a work methodology. I was hired by a company being run the old school way.
These guys never heard of git??
- Fuck you. We never used git and neither should you.
Client company does not want to give me push/pull access to their gitlab instance??
- Fuck you, you can use our RDP server for that.
Project planning features be damned, they've got email, Teams and videocalls!
Can I develop in peace? Fuck no, I have to give IT support to the guy who hired me.
Our timeline is defined IN A FUCKING WORD DOCUMENT FOR FUCKS SAKE. I can't connect Issues to milestones in a Word doc
Oh, and the customer is running everything on prem. If there is a need to scale up, FUCK ME. I should have specified 20 machines from the get go or gtfo. We're using 2 machines to run 8 different services that are going to be ingesting and computing data.
They want state of the art on a cheapskate.
And I have nothing else lined up at the moment. Although I am soon to renew the contract... This contract binds me with professional responsibility for a project being ran by people who do not give a single fuck about optimizing the work process.3 -
You've just sent slides upon slides to me called "feedback" but in each you just describe the behavior of what happens on screen.
News flash: I KNOW WHAT THE CURRENT BEHAVIOUR IS. IF I WANTED YOU TO TELL ME WHAT THE CURRENT BEHAVIOUR IS, I WOULD ASK, BUT OBVIOUSLY, I CAN DO THAT MYSELF, SO INSTEAD, I WOULD REALLY APPRECIATE IT IF YOU COULD DESCRIBE THE DESIRED BEHAVIOUR YOU ARE SEEKING, THAN LITERALLY SAYING 'THE BUTTON NAVIGATES ME TO THE NEXT SCREEN WHEN I PRESS IT'
YOU FUCK
DUMB FUCK
CLWON SHIOWEIHOP'ASDFGHIO;DFJBKL;HDFG ADSBFHKL;ASDGIOPSDAFJOFEJAIOLADS FSAD ASAAAASDGADGSFADGS6 -
I post an answer to StackOverflow for the first time in a few months. INSTANT DOWNVOTE + "CORRECT BUT NOT `LOGICAL ENOUGH`"
FUCK YOU
thx for coming to my TedTalk5 -
That slow realization that you're hitting burnout due to the toxicity of those in non-technical roles above you is wild. Also, Jira, Scrum, Sprints and all the extra bullshit can fuck right off as well.3
-
I'm gonna fail my now-online uni course. I'm not understanding jackshit.
Fuck this covid bullshit.
Thank you for listening.17 -
Quarantine, WFH and sleep combo is really not working out for me.
I'm unable to sleep. Therefore I'm wide awake at 4AM, but will sleep for 12 hours when I eventually manage to fall sleep. But then, I have meetings tomorrow and won't be able to sleep all day.
Overall, fuck covid.
Thank you for listening.8 -
I fucking hate Reddit
Because I don’t interact with other peoples post too much but do so when the post is mine, I’m considered spammer.
The 90/10 rule is ridiculous.
This morning I got banned from r/internetisbeautiful because of this stupid rule.
Not because my website is not beautiful, hell, it got thousands upvotes. But because I used the same domain for different unrelated projects, same way you can have different GitHub pages under one user.
Fuck this, fuck18 -
Have any JabbaScripters ever heard of backwards compatibility?
Nope. Because all the shit on NPM is written by 15-year olds who don't know how to code properly, not to say maintain their packages.
Fuck you.6 -
I really despise the non-tech sluts who think their only job is to hold meetings and "talk". "Do you wannaa taalk about iiit?" Fuck you bitch you're not my therapist.2
-
corporate emails and what they mean
- “changes to our privacy policy” — we raised capital, time for you to leave! good times are over.
- “changes to our pricing” — we are basically acquired, leave now.
- “blah blah community help blah blah” — fuck you, we can't even be bothered to fix bugs in our product.
- “blah blah 30% off blah blah” — yup, the unsubscribe button was broken last time you clicked it. -
Problems with redis... timeout everywhere...
30k READs per minute.
Me : Ok, How much ram are we actually using in redis ?
Metrics : Average : 30 MB
Me ; 30 MB, sure ? not 30 GB ?
Metrics : Nop, 30 MB
Me : fuck you redis then, hey memory cache, are you there ?
Memory cache : Yep, but only for one instance.
Me ok. So from now on you Memory cache is used, and you redis, you just publish messages when key should be delete. Works for you two ?
Memeory cache and redis : Yep, but nothing out of box exists
Me : Fine... I'll code it my selkf witj blackjack and hookers.
Redis : Why do I exist ?2 -
REDIS: Great for cloud, will fuck up your local disk if too many write operations per second.
DynamoDB: WTF 10Mb should not be "too large for a single record"!!
SPARK: NEVER CONNECT IT TO A DATABASE! Wasted A LOT of cluster time. Also, can you be LESS specific on exactly what are the bugs in my code? 'cause I don't think it's possible.
NPM: can't install a package for shit. tried it waaaay to many times.
Makefiles: Just fuck you.
WSL1: breaks more often than a glass hammer.
Python >= 3.6: FUCK ENCODINGS!!
Jupyter: STOP MESSING UP WHILE SAVING!
Living is to collet bugs, it seems.4 -
HOW THE FUCK
DO I USE A NPM PACKAGE
THAT DOESN'T SUPPORT IMPORT X FROM PACKAGE
IN A TYPE:MODULE
REPO?
WHY THE FUCK CAN'T NODE JUST SUPPORT BOTH
WHAT IN THE FUCK
HOW DOES WEBPACK LET YOU USE BOTH?!
I CANNOT FIND A WORK AROUND FOR ERROR
SyntaxError: The requested module 'file-type' does not provide an export named 'default'
WHAT THE FUCK?
DO I NEED TO USE A DIFFERENT PACKAGE?
WHAT THE FUCK11 -
"Ability to work under pressure and work with cross functional teams to meet tight deadlines."
Nope. Nope.
Fuck the managers of whatever shithole you want to drag me to. Nope.1 -
I love getting a fucking email for every fucking change, instead of getting a list of desired changes.
You know what? Fuck this, I'm tired of being the nice guy, I'm not even getting paid for this, and you expect me to do it expediently on a Sunday. I'm done, you can find someone else to piss off for free.2 -
When arcane code randomly uses octal and you thought it was just an alternate way of writing hex because WHY THE FUCK would you use octal..
( There wasn't even a point with the numbers used )3 -
Why THE FUCK is screen mirroring without being in the same wifi network a thing?
Why THE FUCK have all these smart tvs turned this on by default?
Why THE FUCK does the list of found devices SORT itself RANDOMLY if another device is found.
I probably mirrored my phone screen to a random tv in the neighbourhood because as soon as my finger was about to touch the name of my tv, a random tv swooshed into it's place.
WHAT THE FUCK THERE IS NO FUCKING NEED FOR THIS FEATURE IF YOU DON'T HAVE ANY ACCESS POINT AROUND, THERE WILL BE ONE IN 99% OF ALL POSSIBLE USE CASES.
I mean if I got it right, i can share porn with my neighbors now, or at least annoy them?8 -
Why is Typescript such a snarky fuck?
a: number = 2;
tYpE Is TrIviAlLy InFeRReD fRoM NuMbeR lItERaL
Shut the fuck up you barely turing complete piece of digital refuse. Why does it bother you so much if I leave the fucking type on for clarity? This is almost as bad as my ex.5 -
I just don't get my coworkers. They tweak designs, they tweak functionality, but no task is made.
They just simply update designs in Figma, without notifying anyone or just msg me on Slack what to change...
How the fuck do you guarantee that all those tweaks will get reflected to the app? How do you guarantee I won't forget? How do you guarantee QA will test your stupid tweaks?2 -
Doing e-learning for a job
One of the examples provided:
"You could be late for work (fail to meet your objective of being on time) because you're hit by a car whilst crossing the road"
Are you fucking kidding me, I think being late to work would be the least of my worries. Fuck corporate bullshit.18 -
Facebook is a giant piece of shit. Not only is their platform a massive contributor to mental illness, even their API's are fucking garbage. I'm trying to use their ads API and what it does is it hijacks the entire fucking request so you can't even extract data from the request after calling it. Fuck Facebook and everything they've ever "contributed" to society.5
-
Fuck this client's IT department. They're a bunch of Microsoft asslickers.
How am I supposed to push code to your self-hosted GitLab instance if you restrict me to Citrix RDP????? No OpenVPN access because I'm on Linux?? Seriously? Because I am not using any of your laptops?
FUCK YOU DUMBASSES, I COULD DO A BETTER JOB THAN YOU AND I JUST PLAY WITH LINUX.
When I said I only needed terminal access I would have never imagined they were thinking of Putty inside an RDP. What a steaming shit.
Oh you guys don't have a secret management service as any enterprise should? Oh I cannot add a secret management service as part of the solution I am building for you guys because "Hurr Durr yOu HaVe NoT pUt ThIs In ThE pRoJeCt PrOpOsAl sO nO"
Fuck you guys. You guys only don't want to move to the cloud to not lose your jobs. I would be far more productive than relying on you pieces of dumbassery.
They are all having each others back in using shit technology and practices.7 -
For people that do minimal documentation on a package and just say “refer to source code”…fuck you4
-
Fuck you ios,storyboad,xibs,xcode. FUCK OFF!! YOU FUCKING ASSHOLES. Literally giving me migrane with your fucking ass constraints!! Fuck you xcode for not having a terminal. Ios is utterly bullshit. Has fucking all kind of devices that I have to set constraint. Fuck you macos. You are slower than a snail. How on earth do you take so much time to build!!
Width, height, constraints, my ass! What is this fucking logic bro. Fuck you apple for making so many device of different sizes and then hiring us to set constraints. Warning warning warning oh what a load of crap!
I would rather die than set your fucking ass constraints.7 -
Jesus. Got elected by the product owner last minute to give a presentation to a bunch of stakeholders. What the fuck is the point of your job if all you do is delegate your responsibilites to other people.4
-
to anyone who says girls can’t code because they have no skill and therefore shouldn’t be in a high position because they have no dick,
I’ll show you how I code with my girl skills, I’ll fire you with my girl position, and I’ll fuck you with my girl dick.8 -
I run an informational website for medical students. We just got hacked. Fuck you and fuck you WordPress.8
-
How can you tell the difference between "AI" and "Al"? Who the fuck designed these letters?
Footnote: lowercase "ai" & "al"24 -
Don't understand why people diss Windows all the time. It has become so intelligent now that it can sense when you're onto something urgent and important... and then fuck you right in the ass by initiating updates.
-
I'm forced by my job to use this fucking unusable piece of horse shit also know as a Windows operating system.
And it's not only that I have experienced every fucking corner case bug that is possible to occur in our universe.
Not only that that for last 2 years I seen more blue screen than blue sky.
Not only that forced updates fucked my schedules so many times that now I'm really *afraid* to turn off my computer off because I have zero guarantee that I will be able to restart it in a reasonable amount of time.
No, neither of those broke me.
The thing that kills me everyday is, piece by piece ...
WHY THE FUCK THERE IS NO SINGLE, USEABLE, SANE TERMINAL EMULATOR ON WINDOWS
I JUST WANT TO TYPE SOME COMMANDS, COPY/PASTE TEXT AND SCROLL
IS IT TO MUCH ?????
FUCK CMD
FUCK POWERSHELL
FUCK WSL
FUCK ALL THOSE WANKY THIRD-PARTY EMULATORS
FUCK EVERY-COMMAND-LINE-REALATED THING ON WINDOWS
FUCKING USLESS SHIT
CANT EVEN DO SOME SSH COPY/PASTE SHIT
WITHOUT SOME WEIRD CHARACTERS POPING OUT EVERYWHERE.
AND FUCK THAT EVERY ONE OF THOSE MUST HAVE TOTTALY DIFFERENT SET OF KEY SHORTCUTS
AND THAT FUCKING BELL
WHY WOULD YOU EVEN PUT A FUCKING BELL SOUND AS DEFAULT SETTING ??
GO TO HELL MICROSOFT
I WANT MY LINUX BACK7 -
Registering a new account for microsoft teams:
`Your password cannot contain a space, &# characters combination, or the following characters: < >`
Are they storing the passwords in plain text? Are they not sanitizing the input? Why the fuck would they care if I put motherfucking emojis in my password? What the fuck are you doing to the passwords, Microsoft? TELL ME.4 -
Even with something as simple as pagination, it's possible to create a complete accessibility abomination. Dear designer, you've perfected your flat design style.
Fuck you! I'm not coding this.
It's a website about selling solar panels, underfloor heating etc... Not a single piece of design reminds it.7 -
Fuck WFH. I'm so tired of kids yelling. people eating, fucking noises and people leaving their desks for hour, and sayigg I'm sorry I was speaking on mute. Fuck WFH. Everybody needs to get their asses back to the office, and actually do the damn work.
WFH only works if you have kickass passionate people who love their job with an ounce of responsibility.10 -
Okay, here's a rant for you: neo fucking vim and their fucking wrapper plugins for wrapper plugins for wrapper plugins for plugins "tHat'S wRitTen in LOWAA". The fuck is wrong with you, you fucking dumpshits?! Bram was right to not get involved in this bullshit!!8
-
WTF is going on with marketers in LinkedIn?! I’m an engineer why the fuck are you trying to make me sell your product to a company I only code for, fucking spammy cunts contact sales and do your job I have enough with mine.7
-
uSE AnY pRogrAmMinG L@ngu@g3 yOu liKe.
1nTervi3weRs Do N0t CarE aBouT tHe L@nGuAge.
Fuck you. Stop asking time complexity or space complexity of functional code. No one fucking knows.19 -
People that say they want things ASAP. But really mean "no rush, whenever you get to it". Can go fuck themselves.3
-
Ah the classic "Grau Dunkel 70". I know exactly what hex code that is. Thanks, design team!
Fuck you.8 -
“In 15 years, do you see X still being there? No? Then fuck it” - my manager on how to handle “important” decisions4
-
Fuck you edge cases! This task was supposed to be a breeze and thanks to you it’s turning into a nightmare 🤯2
-
Adobe, who the fuck told you to put an icon on the desktop? Knock that shit off, no one wants to open Acrobat XD from the fucking desktop.6
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Some people get ego boost when they get positions like team lead or manager for software development team. In a nutshell you don't know shit about programming how the fuck you became tech lead? You fucked up the entire project that you managed and now shifting blame on someone else. Well fuck you!9
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"Hey Bobby, can you do XYZ for me? I can do it myself but it's such a pain in the ass"
So why the fuck would I do it if you can do it yourself? Guess what it's a pain in the ass for me too! And it's not even my problem!2 -
Microsoft is asshoe.
They tried to force update a Windows 10 Home machine to Windows 11. Nobody clicked okay on anything. It had icon in task bar indicating it would install it on reboot. I had to go into the update settings to click "no for now". Fuck you microsoft. Eat shit and die. Just leave my shit alone.11 -
Dear Managers,
Don't just have one person maintaining something forever. Don't ask that one person to also fix an issue in a module just because they merged in that code a few years ago. Don't ask them to fix issues introduced by others. Grant leave when requested especially when there is no formal leave policy and they are sick.
Fuck you.2 -
Nvidia at it again. After receiving backlash for trying to pass off a 4070 as 4080/12GB, und "unlaunching" it, they did the same shit again.
This time with a 3060/8GB. Yes, as RTX 3060, a well established product with a lot of reviews, intentionally misleading the customers who think that a 3060 is always the regular 12GB model. And the new shit isn't even cheaper.
The main issue isn't the reduced amount of VRAM, it's cutting down the memory bus from 192 to 128 bits, that costs quite some performance.
So if you see a 3060 and think it might be a bargain, watch out that you don't accidentally end up with the "bait and switch" 8GB model.
Or even better, consider a 6650 XT that is both faster and cheaper than a 3060, and RT is lackluster on the small RTX cards anyway.7 -
FUCK!!!!
Got tickets to jbcnconf. Got all the flights in order. Got a place to stay.
And apparently someone decided to have a strike in the airlines on the day my connecting flight was supposed to happen. And ofc the flight got cancelled. And ofc there are no alternatives.
So now the whole ~1k€ conference deal will go down the gutter. FUCK!! I soooo wanted to visit Barcelona and attend that conf!!
FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!
P.S. I hate you, Ryanair8 -
I hate office politics so fucking much. Now that most people aren’t face to face and everything is over chat and voice calls, people seem to get very weird about things that might be said and blow things out of context. If you have anxiety disorder or something fuck off!! You’re stressing the shit out of me and it’s already Christmas so I’m already stressed the fuck out!4
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who the fuck decided macos not showing the file path in finder etc is the default
also not having a home directory available by default in the side bar
i fucking hate you so much9 -
Do you also feel dirty when a client asks for something that completely defats the purpose of the main feature?
yet you "patch " it because "it's a big client after all" and they can't be bothered to do a simple two number addition.6 -
How can you fuck up your code so badly that what should be a reasonably simple desktop app is lagging on any system, no matter how fast?8
-
"I need the login credentials for the CMS service"
*sends the email confirmation email*
"No, I can't confirm your email for you. In plain English: send me the email and password to login."
"Ohhhhhhhhh"
Literally what the fuck is wrong with these people.
I swear we're all fucking doomed.5 -
Dear game developers of mobile games,
Please stop making EVERY FUCKING GAME dependent on having coins AND gems that you have to pay REAL MONEY for to oftentimes even keep playing! Or worse still you are kept at a basic level if you refuse to spend!
It’s boring, annoying, and your game is not worth spending like $100 on before getting bored and moving on.
And don’t get me started on ads!!
FUCK RIGHT OFF!!!17 -
I WANT TO STUFF THE MOUTH OF SO MANY STUPID PEOPLE. THEY TALK LIKE THEY CREATED EVERYTHING AND KNOW EVERYTHING AND THAT THEY CAN TURN WATER TO WINE. BUT NO YOU CAN'T EVEN TURN WATER TO PEE YOU DUMB STUPID FUCK.
Here is an animal band which is going to play some soothing jazz, please stand by
🎺🦆🎻🦢🎷🐓🎤🦒🎛️🐅🥁🐕7 -
nuget is a steaming pile of human shit, fuck the entire microsoft ecosystem and fuck anybody who likes it, and fuck you, and fuck me8
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I dedicate this to all of those hr gurus from top tech companies that rejected me cause they think I won’t fit their culture despite me crushing all their technical interviews, fuck them and their soft skills stupid questions.
I won’t fit there anyways cause I can express my own thoughts using sarcasm and irony and I’m not scared of doing it cause I don’t care about your amazing company culture that prefer robots not people with a little sense of humor. I don’t care about my failures cause there was so many I don’t give a fuck. And by the way if you ask me why I want to work in your amazing company I would always say cause you asked me to work for you and now you treat me like shit. Then 10 years later you blame everyone for toxic culture lol.2 -
what the fuck is up with devs who always send screenshots of code and/or log files? In Slack, which has great functionality for formatting text snippets in a variety of languages and data types?! screenshots of code are really a pet peeve lately. You can't copy the text or click on any urls or do *anything* with a fucking screenshot. so dumb.6
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A custom script that makes a Jira ticket, assigns it to me, marks it as in progress, check out a git branch, set the commit title and the Jira title to my command line argument…. Push, open a PR, and fuck it, merge that shit too.
I checked all the corporate boxes and you got the typo fixed. -
CMAKE, YOU PILE OF SCRIPTING SHIT!
WHY THE FUCK CAN I NOT CHANGE MY BUILD DIRECTORY? I HAVE WASTED AN HOUR ON THIS UNBEARABLE SHITWEASEL OF AN EXCUSE FOR A BUILD SYSTEM!!!!
STOP SHITTING YOUR STUPID CACHE FILES INTO MY SOURCE FOLDER!!! AAAAAHHH!11 -
I'm so done with all the covid talk.
Its all that's ever talked about and you don't get a break.
As if it wasn't bad enough to have that one friend who constantly has to remind everyone how politically educated he is, and how much he hates the neo[whatever the fuck], now he has to remind everyone about his opinions on the vaccine.
No one fucking asked, shut the fuck up.
Your opinions do not matter.3 -
Please just let me cancel my 1-year subscription for the end of that one year NOW without only giving me an option to cancel everything right now and still pay 54 € fee, that's not only silly, it's what makes customers shout FUCK YOU Adobe! Long gone the good old times, who needs your outdated stuff in 2022 anyway?5
-
I swear to god "old school" C++ devs are menace to humanity
Why yes let's make this one line long function, that could even be constexpr, and make it a macro.
Why the fuck not, let's make compiler errors worse by foregoing any type checking. Let's throw away namespacing as well, great.
Fuck you.
I shouldn't have to dig through 4 levels of nested macros just cause "muh performance" and "we've always done it like that".
Shit yourself.8 -
What the hell is wrong with using GitHub, or Git??? A client told me he’s concerned because it’s been, in his words, “compromised” and the admins can “see our code for trouble shooting purposes” and he doesn’t feel comfortable with that…🤨 like…no one wants this code my dude, like the fuck!?! We’re already using a skeleton project from someone else’s git, yet you dnt want this project on there??? Ooooor, is it because you dnt know how to use it??? Nor do you want to take the time to learn it??? 🤨 fuck boy. 😡😡😡😡😡😡🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬17
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!dev
Well fuck you Epic Games and Deep Silver!
I was really interested in getting Metro Exodus, but I'm not gonna install that shitty Epic Store!
Fuck off!11 -
I can't believe fucking Google, aka me cha for SWEs decided that the best they can do is shove all that ram into our computers for Chromium. All of the major apps decided Electron was a good idea and now all of our computers are bloated with fatass memory hogs taking 600MB RAM.
Fuck you Goog.25 -
typescript, I HATE you!
ME: Trying to extend Subject and override Subject.subscribe(PartialObserver<T>)
ME: export class MySubject<T> extends Subject<T> {
subscribe(obs?:PartialObserver<T>): Subscription {
return super.subscribe(obs);
}
}
ME: compile
TS: Compilation error! No such method to override!
ME: load the app -- ERROR
ME: recompile
TS: Compilation error! No such method to override!
ME: load the app -- works perfectly
:confusedjackie:
Make up your mind! So is that class compileable or not???
If not -- how the fuck does it work then???
If yes -- why the fuck do you yell in my face with all those errors???8 -
Pythons tkinter library has a module called "N". Just N. That's it.
So whenever you type "N" and want to autocomplete some local variable or class name, the IDE will instead import that module!
Who the fuck thought N would be a good name??? Some people have some serious issues...9 -
To any CEOs that berade there employees for only getting something 99% correct even though the team is less than 3 weeks old, FUCK YOU. That shit is not motivating and you just fucked up any motivation your employees had for being excited to build your product.3
-
I am happy about a lot of code i have written but most recently speaking, the fuck you github page mentioned in https://devrant.com/rants/4934026/...1
-
Latex, can you for once be nice and not fuck up my images, please?
Can you stop pushing this image which you clearly have enough space for to the next page and leave the previous page completely empty??9 -
You see that, over there?
That massive, 10-ton bag of dicks sitting there in the corner?
Secure Code Warrior can eat that ENTIRE FUCKING THING!
SO many flaws in their tests... SO much HIGHLY questionable content... utterly RIDICULOUS bullshit code with no comments and no context... asking me fucking Angular questions when I'm doing an Express test... two answers that are IDENTICAL... and a busted-ass site on top of it all.
I hate this motherfucking bullshit SO much, and at this moment I hate my employer even more for forcing me to deal with it.
But, hey, I hope you enjoy no work getting done today since you seem to prefer I do this instead, so I guess I'll just scare my dog some more as I yell about this bullshit.
Fuck you Secure Code Warrior, fuck you very, VERY much.7 -
When your plugins list in your newly "coded" WordPress site could use an infinity loader, that means you are probably one of those fucking two weeks fucking coding bootcamps miracles. Fuck, that's not how the website is done...
-
Got blames for 2 hours because our product went down.
Because the provider of license managment went down.
Well, now I put in place a "fuck you" work around. If licensing provider is down, people can still connect and use product (But not create new accounts).
So silly. -
As many here might be aware, the new RTX series dropped! With this, a lot more performances… and a lot more power consumption
At this rate you'll soon need a dedicated grid to power this shit. This is pissing me off, as we're not living in times of energetic abundance. Prices of fuel skyrocket due to the situation in Eastern Europe, and we need more than ever to find alternative energy sources that don't mess our planet further up. So the last thing we need is some piece of computer hardware that chugs near as much as a fucking vacuum cleaner
There's a petition treating of that with more details, if you agree this is a problem, it would be awesome if you could sign it and share it everywhere you can
https://chng.it/hGkcvHpdY87 -
Why do game studios force social/multiplayer in single player games?
Single player sandbox? How about we make it a multiplayer co-op?
Just fine 1 on 1 brawl? Hey how about you find a team and tag team? No? Too bad fuck you, no points to you for a whole fucking season.
Ugh.15 -
concious inclusion training: we want you to talk and share about a bunch of shit that's illegal to ask in interviews: age,sex, orientation, family status, religion, values, gender identity, ethnicity etc
what the fuck do any of these things even have to do with the job?
im confused but whatever6 -
Who the fuck at google thought it was a good idea to not let you log out from a single account in gmail when multiple are logged in in the browser. You have to log out of all of them all or not at all. And it is a new change, i can remember being able to do that previously. Just why?2
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I will delete my question. Fuck you all! Fuck Shopware and your lack of support! Fuck StackOverflow and your erratic standards of downvoting, deleting, or simply ignoring helpful questions, while piling up React and jQuery details bullshit. Fuck you all seriously! Just typing this to see if anyone of you yankees cares enough to down vote or ban me. Fuck the fucking fuckers!20
-
What is it about robot collected data that makes researchers so anal? Like, dude, it's not even personal data. It's literally robot's joint motor recordings. It's not nuclear data, so why the fuck do you protect it like your life and your country depend on it?
I hope you get fisted by that data every night and how it will end up in oblivion sooner because you didn't publish it. You asshole.8 -
systemd is like: this service/process is throwing warning during boot, so let's wait 120 million seconds and hope the warning magically goes away because fuck you user who wants to get to his desktop. what's why!3
-
I've lived in this apartment for four years.
Tomorrow I'm moving out.
I've never ever lost my keys.
But today, the day before I'm moving out,
I LOOSE MY FUCKING KEYS!?!!?
What the actual fuck is this? If there is a god, which I'm quite sure there is not, fuck you!30 -
If you put “up to” in front of “proposed salary”, which ofc is a very high number, I put your job offer in the trash. Just put the range or fuck off.
I will never understand how the little brain of recruiters works.
They write shit like we weren’t smart enough to see it.5 -
Microspyoft decided to retire Atom IDE, what a bullshit company, if you check their asses you will find them stinky as garbage because they only use toilet paper, I started to stop using their shit, any basic solution they offer to you that you might think 'Oh, that's the solution to rely on for a lifetime ' no man hold your excitements cause they are going to fuck your brain later, same as they will do with Windows10, suddenly the bunch of lazy asses decided 'actually let's create windows11, and stop supporting windows10 by 2025' Go to fuck yourselves bitches, I stopped using all your shit.16
-
Must be great to be a giant fucking dumbass company raking in more than enough money, that you can't add 40-50 more characters on why your API doesn't like our call.
"Here's an API call with 3 different ways to make a call, we will show you an example for only the easiest method, AND if you get the more complex ways wrong, we'll just respond with an error code 422 with the error message "validation failed".
fuck.
you!!!!!!!!
I don't give a fuck about calling them out:
Its Bexio.5 -
I cant believe its impossible to find a dev job even with a computer science degree. What have I wasted 6 years of my life for then if no one values a degree? Fuck you20
-
Oh great, now garbage websites can even break the browser's reload button. Wanna reload the page that never stops loading or crashes its scripts? Click the button and watch the browser do fuck all and a little bit of nothing.
Nah, you see to refresh that polished rotten turd you gotta close the tab and then restore it, and if that doesn't work open a new one and copy-paste the URL because who the fuck doesn't like some invalid state.
Can't wait for the day I have to shutdown and disconnect the battery because some idiot messed up the layout.3 -
Take me into the organization as a dev
tell me that I'm supposed to bring ideas and tell you how to improve and what's required
I do that
You ignore me
You expect ultra performance and good profits
GO FUCK YOURSELF7 -
Fuck Wordpress, Fuck Wordpress's PHP
I'm so fucking tired of everything in this godforsaken CMS. Import a JS File? Sure, just add a *completely obvious* line into a very specific PHP File, where you'll have to specify a lot of "useful" parameters. No, I somehow DON'T want to specify that I don't wand jQuery in every import. And don't even get me started on Content Delivering. Embed CSS? Sure, just write the fucking whole path to the file, or use the broken get_stylesheet_uri() Function. Embed an Image? Sure, let me just go to the Backend and wait 6 Minutes for this bullshitty System to upload the image and then copy the hard-coded Link. Oh, you want to remove googleapi embeds? Sure, let me just fuck up your whole Website in return.
You want jQuery? Well instead of using the "$" Symbol, you have to use the jQuery() Function. Except when you don't have to, which is 100% random each time you reload the page. Oh, you actually did import a JS File? Sure, let me just not run it. Thank you fucking piece of shit thats calling itself "WordPress" and fuck you and everyone whos actively encouraging its usage1 -
If you really think about it, asking a person what their pronouns are, he/she/they etc., is basically sending a REST OPTIONS request. What a technically pure and proven thing to do.
You assume OPTIONS response of an API, you get "400 Fuck You". Or, if that API is nice, you can get "426 Get Out Of Your Cave", but that's the best you're gonna get.7 -
FUCK YOU to all the platforms abandoning OpenGL.
FUCK YOU MICROSOFT! (defaults opengl 1.1)
FUCK YOU APPLE!
I guess we are moving steadily towards Vulkan.
Is Apple even going to support that?
FUCK YOU APPLE!
And an extra FUCK YOU APPLE! just because they are dicks in general.
Don't think I forgot Microsoft's dickishness: FUCK YOU MICROSOFT!1 -
Hey, all you shitty devs who give my Udemy courses 1 or 2 stars with no comment or feedback
FUCK YOU!!!!12 -
Fuck, my watch later playlist is full on YouTube. Why the fuck do they limit that? I even pay for premium you fuckers.6
-
Today has officially drained all the brain I didn't even have yesterday. Let's hope I get somewhere with this thing, or else all the brain I've wasted is going to be useless.
Also, fuck opencv's fisheye undistortion. Mofo, I don't have the camera params, how the fuck do you want me to give you your stupid kernel shit? Shut the fuck up from my face. Stupid hoebag.
... 😭😭😭😭😭 -
My manager tried to schedule a 5 hour meeting for me to attend :)
Disguised as “working session”
Fuck you asshole2 -
Fuck those people who make you feel negative about yourself. I hope everyone has a good upcoming week.2
-
Fuck environments without direct internet access and only http proxy in place.
That is all, thank you for listening3 -
Microsoft revoked my GitHub Copilot Beta licence because it is now available for everyone for $10/month :(
Fuck you Microsoft15 -
Usually websites:
- wrong password -> Password field cleared and focused again
Apple websites:
- wrong password -> Password field cleared and email field focused again and password field hidden because fuck you!10 -
Nvidia. Why the fucking hell do I need to sign in to my Nvidia account to install drivers? I fucking hate your proprietary bullshit agenda!8
-
After 3 weeks of being interviewed on upwork she replied today and told me
"Sorry, the only reason we cant hire you is because the client wants only EU passport devs"
.....
Is this my fault? How is this my fault? EVERY FUCKING TIME WHEN I TRY TO SUCCEED AT ANYTHING LIFE JUST FORCEFULLY REJECTS ME FROM SUCCEEDING AND IT IS ALWAYS BECAUSE OF THE LUCK THAT I DONT HAVE. HOW IS IT MY FAULT FOR BEING BORN IN A GARBAGE BULLSHIT PIECE OF SHIT COUNTRY AND IMMEDIATELY HAVE HUGE DISADVANTAGE IN LIFE? HOW IS THAT FUCKING FAIR??? WHY DO YOU GIVE A FUCK FROM POLITICAL REGIONS WHERE I AM BORN IF I CAN DO THE DEV JOB RIGHT????? WHST RHE FUCK IS THIS FUCKING LOW LIFE ABOUT IF I ***NEED*** LUCK TO BECOME SUCCESSFUL. NO MATTER HOW SKILLED OR HARD YOU TRY YOU WILL ALWAYS APPARENTLY FAIL IF YOU ARE MISSING ***LUCK***15 -
This fucking internal tool does not have any CLI capabilities, so to open each file i need to and get the data i have to manually hit 'File -> Open' select the file, then double click
Then high light the data i want and copy out what I need
If there was even just a cli to cycle over the fucking files to open each in their own instance it would be a good deal less fucking tedious and annoying
Like how the fuck do you not allow passing in a file name on cli to open like fuck i have to do this 40 fucking times FUCK i get this tool is originally from the fucking 90's but still you push updates every 3 months for the databases it accesses at least let me fucking pass in a fucking file to open it from cli3 -
You know what fuck github , anyone remember when git cli was easy and straight forward to use
Now i have conflicting master branches because the remote is main and git automatically defaults to master.
Git still asks for a password while github can't wait to inform me how I have to go through the very long process of setting up an auth_token.
Apparently https remote origins for some reason don't work anymore, why because apparently i need to change them into ssh, good luck with the public key errors
This sucks , fuck github and fuck politics9 -
is the job of being a "software engineer" (code monkey) supposed to be many parts of wannabe archeologist figuring out what the fuck is going on, happened, and reading the codebase , so you can figure out how to implement your jira ticket?3
-
Chromium cannot sign in (to Google) anymore to sync.
I would just like to know, why does google hate secure systems?11 -
After all the rants I've written on this topic, no, no, fuck no. I ain't answering jackshit. The trauma is very real. I'm trying to not have a panic attack just remembering few of the times I've lost work, personal data, side projects, accounts, you name it.
Oh dear God it's hard to breathe...5 -
Anyone who purposefully makes a CSS rule that’s like 10 classes deep can go fuck themselves with a elongated mason jar. Unless your an evil fuck or a spawn of satan, there’s no reason to make other dev’s jobs a living fucking hell. Fuck you.4
-
Next time you meet an arrogant asshole who just wont shut the fuck up about how smart they are, ask them this question.
If i were to put you in the year 1800. What could you offer the human race?9 -
Fine! If I’m not allowed to make improvements to the site, I’ll blatantly write you shitty code and continue to fuck you over for the future. I tried to help but you guys are fucked.3
-
Oh my god, GDScript is the single biggest piece of shit scripting language I have ever witnessed. It somehow manages to combine the very worst things of dynamic typing with the downsides of static typing, all in one bundle of utter shit
Imagine you have two game object scripts that want to reference each other, e.g. by calling each others methods.
Well you're outta fucking luck because scripts CANNOT have cyclic references. Not even fucking *type hints* can be cyclic between scripts. Okay no problem, since GDScript is loosely based of Python I can surely just call my method out of the blue without type hints and have it look it up by name. Nope! Not even with the inefficient as fuck `call` method that does a completely dynamic-at-runtime fuck-compile-time-we-script-in-this-bitch function call can find the function. Why? Because the variable that holds a reference to my other script is assumed to be of type Node. The very base class of everything
So not only is the optional typing colossal garbage. You cant even do a fucking dynamic function call because this piece of shit is just C++ in Pyhtons clothing. And nothing against C++ (first time I said that). At least c++ lets me call a fucking function7 -
i don't wanna say it, but I'm going to say it
1, 2...
3
FUCK RUST.
Took me 30 minutes to prototype this shit in concise, safe and idiomatic Bash.
Took me 4 hours to rewrite it in idiomatic Rust. Did it work just as well? BIG FUCKING NO.
Rewriting it in a crazy-girlfriend-like annoyingly strict nominal Typescript, took me 1 hour.
IT WAS fucking DELICIOUS doing it.
Did it work just as well, BIG FUCKING YES!
Fuck you Rust. F U C K YOU
--- still love you tho22 -
Fuck you, Nvidia. Uhm no, this time not from Torvalds, but EVGA: they're fed up with Nvidia's antics towards their AIB partners. No 4000 series EVGA GPUs anymore.
Source: https://forums.evga.com/Official-Me...9 -
if the documentation of a class just has a table of function params and return types without any example snippets of how to use them, fuck you and your entire stack and your entire docs.8
-
YouTube: My ultimate ultimate working from the toilet productivity setup as a software wanker
= cue useless expensive gadgets and seizure inducing lights -
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sync my desktop to the cloud without letting me know after the latest system update, FUCK YOU.3
-
Fuck you safari for automatically converting UTF-8 NFD characters to UTF-8 NFC characters. Cost us like an hour debugging!
-
"you gotta get your nobility in check"
WHAT
THE FUCK
DOES THAT
EVEN
MEAN
dear supercar glass cannon brain, can you please be more direct in your fever dream revelations? or should I wait for two years again to get the meaning?21 -
FUCK YOU PHP, FUCK YOU SYMFONY AND DEFINITELY FUCK YOU SHOPWARE.
Don't get me wrong, PHP has evolved a lot, but the stuff people are building with it is just the biggest load of fucking shit I have ever seen: Shopware. Shopware is the most ass-sucking abomination to extend. It's nearly impossible to develop anything beyond "use the standard features and shut the fuck up" that is more sophisticated than a fucking calculator.
The architecture of this pile of crap is the worst bullshit ever. A mix of OOP, randomly making use of non OOP concepts and features together with the unnecessarily HUGE amount of useless interfaces and classes. Sometimes I feel like it's 90% fucking shitty boilerplate shit.
And don't get me started with TWIG. It's a nice thought, but WHY THE BLOODY FUCK WOULD YOU NOT USE VUE IF YOU ARE ALREADY USING IT FOR A DIFFERENT PART OF SHOPWARE. This makes no fucking sense whatsoever and makes development of new features a huge pain in the ass. I can't comprehend how people actually like using this shit.
OH AND THE DATABASE. OH MY FUCKING GOD. This one is bad. Ever tried to figure anything out in a database where random strings (yes MySQL "relational" - you might think) that are stored as text in a JSON format make up some object or relations during runtime?? Why the fuck do you have foreign and primary keys if you don't use them properly??
Seriously you can't even figure out which data belongs to what because the architecture just sucks fucking ass. FUCK YOU Shopware wankers, you suck, your product sucks, your support sucks, your architecture sucks and you keep releasing new versions that regularly break shit even in minor versions.
I used to like PHP, but not in projects like these.6 -
I'm still using .then().catch() instead of the async await.
So, first of all, Fuck you for calling it a STANDARD now. its nowhere near to be called standard. You wanna get some data from an API? Wanna call it using axios or fetch? What if the server is down? what if there's an error that you don't even know existed? Where do I get that kinda error in async await? try-catch? no thanks :| I'm good -_-8 -
Yeah, fuck all the authentication/authorization framework I build, just access manage resources directly and leak stuff, assign it to wrong accounts and don't even check if they should be able to with that eye shore you call code1
-
QA/stakeholder person: can you add the following links to the footer?
devs: sure. easy.
devs: oh wait, 3 of those links are 404. Are you planning to create those pages? or were those urls just a suggestion?
<crickets>
devs: ok well for now we'll leave those out.
stakeholder (a day later): hey these 3 links are still not in the footer!
devs: yeah we asked about that yesterday.
boss: the links are there now
devs (quietly): fuck you. -
Python be like:
TypeError: 'callable_iterator' object is not callable
and also:
TypeError 'callable_iterator' object is not subscriptable
Why the fuck did you name it "callable iterator" if you can't call it, or iterate it.4 -
honestly bud
FUCK pyright, fuck python and, most of all, yeah, you, poetry, you piece of shit, fuck YOU poetry. You are a synonym for bloat. BLOAT. BLOOAAAAT!
Java, dear, I've learned to appreciate, love and fancy you by MY GROWING BURNING HATRED OF PYTHON2 -
Do you guys remember the fun little joke utility called fuck that corrected typos?
While debugging an absurd 2s shell load time, I noticed today that the command it appends to .bashrc to _set a fucking alias_ takes almost 400ms to execute.1 -
As somebody who works in the industry, 2FA is a great idea, we need to do it more.
As a user, fuck 2FA, I ain't have time for that shit, if you make me type my screen lock once again I will throw my computer out of the window.8 -
Dear Windows, we have to talk. I love you, you know that, and I know that your market share has been shrinking in recent years and you're shit scared of becoming irrelevant but for the love of god:
- STOP asking me every god damn few weeks if I want to change my browser settings - NO I FUCKING DONT WANT TO USE BING, FUCK OFF
- STOP trying to be like an app and add pointless new "features" that nobody cares about and just do your fucking job, which is to be a PLATFORM which is stable, never changes and that gets out of my fucking way
- STOP reinstalling apps I uninstall, Im NOT FUCKING INTERESTED IN PAINT 3D, FUCK OFF
FUCK, ME,2 -
Fuck it... Right in the middle of a commit and github goes down, no fucking early Friday for me you bastards......1
-
I will never make a backend in C# ever again.
Just look at this bullshit:
official docks, PAGES long: https://learn.microsoft.com/en-us/...
confused devs running rampant: https://stackoverflow.com/questions...
absolute total GARBAGE
literally ANY other language or framework, you set an env file and you fuck off. of course microsoft has to make the most convoluted pile of shit horse shit fuck shit that confuses everyone. i shouldn't have to pray to the dev gods every time i spin off a staging or production build that my environment variables are set correctly
GOD10 -
AWS test error: An error occurred (AccessDenied) when calling the PutObject operation: Access Denied"
Hmmmmmmm
* proceeds to spend 2 hours correcting the role and policy for said user *
Alright, let's test!
AWS test error: An error occurred (AccessDenied) when calling the PutObject operation: Access Denied"
fuck you.
i'm not fucking sleeping until this is resolved7 -
My whitewashed LinkedIn profile keeps getting harassed by recruiters when no one looks at my real LinkedIn profile under my Chinese name.
To save everyone's time typing fuck you because I am using LinkedIn. I will type it for you: fuck me.2 -
Fuck Apple with two pineapples in the ass. 99€ per fucking year to tell me how the fuck should the access to my app be. I damn require users to sign up. I only need email and country. Not a single other piece of data. My app is not a goddamn catalogue or boutique. No free content, free app but each user needs to Auth themselves. You fucking telling me y pay 99€ so you decide how the access to my app should be?
Cunt Apple should rot in 10 day old humid shit and let devs be owners of their apps and hard work. Clowns.7 -
Fucking lazy product managers....
Can't fucking care about renaming a word document....
The document says template you moron. You are supposed to duplicate it for your requirements. Not edit directly on the template.
And fuck whoever gave this moron edit access to a global template.
Fuck....3 -
I really dislike micromanagement. I don't want to dictate details. I don't like hierarchies where my direct reports obey me.
The only thing that obeys me is my hands, with them, I write the exact code I want. I don't hire another pair of hands. I hire another brain.
When you see your direct reports as professionals, you can give declarative tasks: "make a pretty website footer", "make that page load quicker". If you leave implementation details for your direct reports to decide, this doesn't mean they'll fuck up. They are professionals too, and if you personally interviewed them, you better believe they can handle it. -
Fuck Facebook!
Disabling apps without warnings or anything which means no customer login. This is a huge pain since the solution doesn't have any way to login to the same account with another credential.
"Oh did you use that? Now you can't. And the only way to do anything is to submit a form to 'appeal' the case which we'll just reject without any notifications or emails"
Normally I won't rant like this or use that much swearing.. but in this case:
Fuck you, Facebook. Fuck. You.7 -
That one colleague coming up with questions unrelated to his teams field, not grasping your explanation, then answering bitchy because he doesn't understand and finally sends you a new (totally moronic) jira ticket after you stop responding to him, totally killing your last bits of motivation and concentration for that day.
fuck you. -
Fuck sequelize, the bloody query generated by the "ORM" give diferent result on the same DB if you trie it on dBeaver (works fine) vs node (shit results).
order DESC have 0 effect on sequelize, but it appears on the logger as part of the query.
I just want to go to sleep ffs.7 -
YOU DONT WANT TO BE ME FUCKING ME RYT NOW
..... I DONT MEAN LIKE FUCKING BUT
WAT THA FUCK AM I EVEN SAYING !!!!!!5 -
Android 12, stop telling me every other day which app has permission to access my location in the background. I know, I gave permission, and I want to keep the setting "Allow all the time". Where's the "don't ask again" option?
And why does this happen for an app released by the German federal government (about once a week) but never, ever for your shitty Google Maps that always seems to know where I've been (at least if don't leave my phone at home, which is hard to do in times when you have to show your digital proof of vaccination everywhere yo go). Fucking Android, fuck the Android 12 clunkiness (inspired by Apple's iOS?) and fuck the fucking notifications. This is my phone, I paid for it, I own it, I want to turn off this bullshit. Wait, Google, once I find time to get back to LineageOS/Cyanogenmod you will never see a trace of my digital existence again. Oh, and fuck your "digital wellbeing" as well! At least you let me turn that off. Yes, I know, I am not grateful, but that's what devrant is for, isn't it? Fuck you, Google!2 -
How fucking hard can it be to show a simple image. Guess which app has this feature.
Images are cropped to frame, but you can tap to fit the whole image to frame instead. No way to see the image on full screen. Pinch to zoom works, but it will immediately unzoom if you let go even one finger.1 -
Way to go Xcode, you make something as simple as a splash screen an insane headache of cOnStrAiNts
WTF is going on
fuck you -
They bought and killed the awwapp.com
And now they demand I paid $200 for their crappy UX, for a battleship-level-software when all I really want is smth lightweight, simple and nimble, like draw.io.
I think I was never this satisfied pressing the "cancel subscription" button.
Fuck you, Miro!
Give us back the AWW!!!2 -
My manager sent me a Desktop screen without informing me and I also didn't ask for the same. Now, he wants me to use it. And i am like, WTF 😡😡. Who the fuck told you in ur dreams to send me this shit.8
-
Me: IDK how this works. Lets ask support.
PLC Support: Use these ID's to locate what you need in our documentation.
Me: Why the fuck are all of them invald and I cant find shit?!
PLC Support: 🙃🤷 -
I have these gulp tasks to preprocess my css and html. months ago it was all polished and working great.
I run the commands today, npm complains about deprecated something and doesn't let me run... I do updates, I try to run again: "Right now osX is not supported".
I literally did not change anything all these months.
Fuck you npm.3 -
linux wonders:
>su - otheruser
>whoami
root
fuck you!!!!!
it's one of those days where not even basic linux commands are working.... i'm about to give up, i'm so pissed off6 -
I FUCKING HATE MICRO$OFT AND WINDOWS SO SO FUCKING MUCH THEY CANT EVEN MAKE UPDAYES WORK PROPERLY IT LKTERALLT JUST MADE MY PC DISPLAY A LITERAL FUCKING RECOVERY SCREEN FUCK YOU MICRO$OFT5
-
I'M SICK OF YOUR FUCKING HURR DURR TRIPLE FAULT HURR DURR PAGE FAULT THANKE QEMU FOR NOT EVEN BOTHERING TO TELL ME WHAT EXACTLY HAPPENS AND FUCK YOU GDB FOR NOT WORKING
-
God damn it Microsoft Teams is the shittiest piece of conferencing software ever. The UI is not consistent at all, calls are dropping like flies, and it does this bullshit thing where if packets are dropped it speeds up people's voices which is annoying as fuck. Echoes are everywhere and does no background filtering so people are on mute when they're talking. Fuck you Microsoft for bundling this pos down our throats.8
-
Stop asking me what my tattoo means, didn’t you read Shakespeare in high school. It’s whatever the fuck u want it to mean9
-
How the fuck is Firebase still a thing? I just spent hours debugging a random "not authorised" error, only to find out you need to enable a deprecated API even if you're only using the new (recommended) one. Do they tell you about it? Fuck no, they keep it disabled by default, they tell you to only use the new API, and they make it pretty much impossible to find the deprecated API you need to enable without a direct link.
And why the fuck does the official SDK send image URL as { "imageUrl": "http://..." }, when the endpoint expects it to be { "image": "http://..." }? Why the fuck does the documentation mention both options interchangeably, while only the latter one actually works?7 -
Haven't pushed anything to my github repos for over a year. Tried it today and it took me FOURTY FUCKING MINUTES to figure out this Personal Access Token HORSESHIT.
FUCK YOU GITHUB, why must every aspect of software development become spoiled by PARANOID FUCKING FUCKWEASELS?5 -
To the bright engineer who considered it a good idea to open Zoom's toast popups in their own windows without tagging them appropriately as frameless short-lived managed popups:
Ride a hedgehog to work, you lazy fuck.4 -
GraphQL is the worst "invention" ever, it is more effort to create the fucking queries including nesting, references, variables etc. FUCK THIS SHIT.
This is just another one of these "oooouuuuu look at us wE UsE GrAPHql!11!!" bullshit things that make daily work sucky. Thanks Facebook (fuck you too).13 -
Ok now that I learned react and nextjs i just want to say that I FUCKING HATE REACT AND NEXTJS FUCK YOU THIS SHIT IS SO STRESSING AND MIND CONSUMING. I'D RATHER USE ANGULAR EVEN FOR A SMALL PROJECT WHICH IS AN OVERKILL THAN REACT. I'LL USE REACT ONLY IF IM FORCED TO USE REACT AND HAVE NO ALTERNATIVE.18
-
When you are right and in conflict with someone on some topic and they don't have guts to accept their mistakes but only to shame you for some reason, bring them down and fuck them up
-
Third week in this job and it takes seniors 2 weeks to approve merge request that consists of 3 lines. So many pretentious discussions. Fuck all of you approve this shit so I could be happy with at least some progress.3
-
Fuck angular.
Syncing formControl errors?
Fuck you. Infinite loop.
Debounce formgroup validator?
Fuck you. We clear all asyncValidator errors on every change12 -
There is a element in mappView that lets you display a specific image from a list based on a index. It has the parameters selectedImageIndex and selectedIndex. One is used to set the other to read. Its not like that you need RW separation. Its done with variable binding. So why the FUCK is it there????2
-
I fucking hate how almost every website now requires your email to be able to download a simple document template
Why tha fuck do you need my email for????
just let me download your fucking template6 -
Oh my... I'm so exhausted and tired of everything. First I got really sick for two weeks and couldn't work. I also collapsed on the floor one night and hurt myself. Well what happens yesterday? You guessed it - I fell down the stairs and hurt exactly the same spots as two weeks ago... (no I was not drunk).
And then I have to work on a holiday today (yes, still with that same fucking shitty shopware project) because I have to attend an appointment in a different country on Thursday (I need Thursday off, but I don't have any vacation left).
So here I'm sitting almost crying in pain because of this FUCKING project, everything hurts, I still can't think straight and shopware is denying my refresh tokens. FUCK THIS JOB. Seriously. Fuck it. I have had the chance to look into a lot of companies and do different things, but this is the worst.
Nobody fucking cared about the project for nearly 8 months, and now that I'm close to leaving the company they begin to act like "oh well it must be done by then". ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! I told them a million times I need help and that I won't be able to finish it in time. That's what happens when nobody plans a project, but accepts it anyways because "it brings in money".
Seriously?! This project has been a waste of money and my energy and nerves. We're already 100% over the budget and will never ever see one cent coming from this shitty project. WHY FOR FUCKS SAKE IS IT THAT THOSE PEOPLE JUST DONT SEE IT WHEN A PROJECT IS GOING DOWN THE FUCKING DRAIN?!5 -
ops: your dev environment shuts itself down on boot up, something is broken in the boot process and it'd be more trouble to figure out why so you're better off making a new one again
fuck me
and fuck you too AWS EC2 whatever -
website no longer lets me use it on mobile
ok, fuck you, I’ll install the mobile app
app is shod city
what10 -
Fucking Visual Studio, I fucking hate you, I FUCKING HATE YOU, I FUCKING HATE YOU YOU PIECE OF GARBAGE, FUUUUUUCK!!!
WHAT THE FUCK!!!
I have my fucking solution. It's working fine.
I close VS.
I open it again.
Many projects are now BROKEN.
WHAT THE FUCK!!! I'm so tired of this SHIT5 -
WooCommerce sucks, Block editor sucks, Elementor is no better, but if you want a real mess, just add more plugins. Bonus: if you use any "third party WordPress plugin", WooCommerce support can always say, oh yeah, I see that you are using a third party plugin, so we cannot support you, sorry.
Fuck, that's not the kind of front-end development that I was hoping to do in 2023.4 -
Why the fuck why are tslint and prettier are always sucking their dicks and fuck each others asses.
Do you know this moment when you think:.... 🤔 They have millions of downloads, why do I bother formatting my code so much. Mabye all this people are smarter and saving so much time.
Then you set up eslint and prettier adjusting 10000k rules just to find eslint and prettier five minutes later in one file fucking their asses again how to indent on save😠😱7 -
i am terrible at using swagger autogenerated code, yaml and swagger files
dont fucking false positive pass, tell me if theres indenting wrong
also why the fuck wont you generate the code im trying to get you to generate
i fucking hate you so much, ive done this once before what am i doing wrong now -
Fucking Quarkus. Fucking Panache. Fucking ORM.
I wanted to do a fucking simple projection. First this piece of fuck, the Panache, won't let me do a Projection because of a fucking bug, that haven't implemented it properly until 2.12 (fuck and you call this v2?). Ok, upgraded, to the latest 2.16, cuz why the fuck, i'm upgrading already. But now the whole fucking quarkus app won't start! Noice! Ok, fuck it, let's go down exactly to 2.12. Quarkus started, perfect. But now, this pice of fuck Hibernate says 'collection was evicted' whenever i tried to read a collection in the setter (Access.PROPERTY), which worked just fucking fine before. But okay, fuck you. I'll write a @PostLoad method, fine, just fuck off.
But that's not the end! Now it says I cannot write `select parent.someColl is not null and parent.collection is empty as canProcess` because "is empty" only supported in where clauses. What fucking wonderful system! Well, fuck you. I'll write a union query. But guess what! JPA standard does not support union queries, nor HQL (Eclipse Link does, btw). Ok, fuck this shit, let's write a native query. But hey, fucking Panache does not support that. There is no fucking place in their fucking docs stating anything about how to use native queries.
So, fuck you quarkus, fuck you panache, fuck you hibernate, fuck you overcomplicated limiting bullshit called full-fledged ORMs. I'm moving to a fucking mybatis and fuck it. It's simple as fuck, does not fucking restrict me in writing whatever shit query I want to write and let's me map the shit just fine.1 -
Ok being a developer and a technical assistant at the same time
Yesterday was out in the field we where fixing network at one insurance company and extending telephone line to of the offices....man what a labor intense job....
we had to drill a whole on one of those metal trunking.... man those fuckers are hard as fuck
having had spent the whole fucking day out the office i get a call saying 1 of the laptops at the office didnt have OS installed and one had a defected screen and they where in stock
and Im supposed to be checking these laptops when they come before going into stock
and Im like WTF!!??? confused and shit + being tired
got back to the office and fuck it was a shit show
the whole technical department got fucked over this and Up to now I have no fucking idea how those laptops got into stock and we missed it
My only answer is they never came for checking and if you try to air that out they will say you are try to blame some1 else for the fuck up and FUCK it
We had to write reports this morning me had 2 from the tender issue
fuck this
fuck this
fuck this fucking shity place -
!rant .
Interesting conversation between coworker 1, 2 and 3.
1 : “ hey do you know if you want to sounds like Australians , start eating spiders. Alternatively you can try to eat kiwi to sound familiar to Australian but isn’t.
2 : “ I fancy myself sugary juices and burgers everyday, but yet I am not becoming American.”
1: “No pal you should start drinking petroleum and yell FREEDOM and ‘this is my right!’ every chances you get. That’s how you become a US citizen without the green card .”
3: “bro, you are taking you are what you eat too literally and stereotypically. Let say if you guys would to suck my dick and drain my semen down your throat, won’t me you my son . But I will get the pleasure.”
John : “Yo what the fuck?”
3: “the real question is ‘yo wanna fuck?’”
1 :”you sus bro”
2: “I’m going to pretend I didn’t read that one .”
John :” 1, which ‘you’ you are referring to? 2, of course you didn’t with that amount of sugary juices.”
2: “hey this is my right!”
John: *mute the off-topic channel *
Yo like what the fuck .14 -
CREA DDF (Canada Real state listings API) is what you get when government fucks with technology.
Holy shit! So f*cking inefficient to use it, test it and get data.
I get the protection behind sensitive data but fuck me if there is not a lot of waiting behind their fucking application process just to fetch some testing data.1 -
Life is shitty till some people work off hours, on Saturdays, ping you anytime. Fuck those people!2
-
Nothing better than greeting a project with a well-architected CSS/Sass file structure and not some framework dependency class name override hell that's all over the fucking place.
So companies please I am begging you to hire frontend developers who know what the fuck they're doing. -
netcoredbg
If you're creating an AUR pakage
Why the fuck are you not referencing every dependency?
And it isn't even some obscure library or anything. It's fucking CMake.3 -
The last major version made IntelliJ Idea unbearably slow on my 1 year old Intel Core i7 PC.
Fuck it, as soon as I have one hour free I'm going to reinstall Java extensions on Neovim. Stack traces sucks enough even without seconds of lags when you try scrolling them.5 -
Why the hell Jira is so fucking slow? Like, I understand that there can be a lot of items to display but YOU DON'T HAVE TO DISPLAY ALL OF THEM. Trying to move task from TODO to IN PROGRESS - and website fucking freezes. What the actual fuck5
-
It's always a fucking joy when your body starts giving you signs about sickness.
Did you want to be productive today? Fuck you: here's a headache, a parched throat, some nausea and shivers. And when you finally get those under control, you're gonna feel too warm and feverish. -
Why the fuck would you have online documentation that has incorrect information?
My PM now thinks I am telling Stories on why I am not done with an integration I am usually done with in a day 🤦🏿7 -
Maven simplejavamail dependency import, build email, try send it: jakarta.mail.messageexception whatever, not class def found. After some googling: Depends on jakarta-mail. Find jakarta-mail dependency, include it in pom, start again: jakarta.mail.someotherclassexception, no class def found.
Yeah fuck you, too...2 -
my 2022 went so great that i can feel the tremors that 2023 is goin to bring. my mom will be super ready to throw her taunts and 'i told you so' when i fuck up, and i have already set up myself to fail4
-
> * npm login *
> puts everything right, uses token because of OTP
> npm login fails: incorrect user or password
you know what, fuck you5 -
Comment in a PR to use ur little component in the 50 pages of docs because it looks better. Fine.
Write 30min after i submitted the changes that it doesn't look as good as you thought and you can go fuck yourself fr. Should have tried it before asking me to change it everywhere mf -
If you are answering a yes or no question with an overcomplicated explanation just to show off, and in the end it turns out it was 99% either yes or no, then please go fuck yourself.3
-
Fuck all of that ego shit, that lil boys club garbage. Fucking douchebag. Don't project your insecurities on me you fucking pissbaby. I gladly invite you to eat my great pumpkin, dumptruck-sized, volumptuous ass. I hope god sends millions of ants after you and they eat you slowly. Why cant you just be nice to others.9
-
No it’s ok you can power trip on me that’s fine, it’s just now your delivery is going to be months late. So who’s fault is it really?
Fuck you - fight me bitch. -
So the question is:
is there any better alternative to material ui?
mui is powerful, but I see no good in it in the field of customization.
You can't do shit without searching smth like: "how to remove the ::before in that mui component"
and getting some answer like:
"oh you can't do that with css! you should use that prop and shit or you should config your library in a way which you can remove ::before"
FFS WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS
I JUST WANT TO WRITE MY BORING CSS AGAIN11 -
Fun Fact: Did you know that ublock origin specifically hides the global store notice banner in WooCommerce by CSS? I found out tonight after fiddling with that shite for almost an hour.
Haha, fuck you.7 -
Never left any, but I'd probably write something like "Why are you even a programmer? Stop before you fuck up yourself, do whatever other job"
-
Why do you ask “can you {do this/that}” when “no” is not an option? Why don’t dare dare to say “please {do this/that}”?
Yeah nah I’m still gonna say no. But fuck your hypocrisy too9 -
When you go to "Oh they do it cheap", don't expect results...
Changed my PC build around 2 years ago.
Went from Core i7 / Nvidia to Ryzen 9 / AMD
Welp, AMD is totaly unstable.
I've invested 5k $ so I'm gonna ride it, but NEVER, EVER EVER again I'm buying AMD CPU or GPU.
Shit is unstable as fuck. I have latency issues, CPU issues, Video issues almost every week.
With Intel/nVidia cvombo I had before, I had issues maybe once every 3-4 months.
So yeah, buy low cost AMD, you pay the price later in usability. Fuck them.21 -
Phone rings.
"Hello, not sure if you remember, but you've been at our job interview 3 years ago. We're just wondering, if you're currently open for work."
In my mind: "yeah, fuck no"... and decline the offer.2 -
If I'm so fucking vital to the meeting then why the fuck did you made the meeting so fucking inconveniently early for me so you can put your new fucking designers in the fucking call.
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No one gives a shit about the fact i have computer science degree. No employer has asked me. Nobody cares. I can't get hired anywhere and i was promised to surely find a job if i have a degree. 6 years of nerve wrecking of my fucking life for a degree wasted in fire. I was SCAMMED. "Software engineering" universities are a fucking SCAM. SCAMMMMM. Fuck you. I'll make my own course and scam desperate people the same way universities do it. The same way andrew tate does it. Fuck you.
In life i learned that you will be successful ONLY IF:
- you have luck
- you're a wealthy millionaire
- you have connections
And you will FAIL IF:
- you try to do good and be fair
Fuck you12 -
I bought a software from FastSpring which claimed it could stop automatic updates, but I was late entering the key for it. Wouldn't you know that a fucking update came in before I could stop it: what geniuses these fkg assholes at MS are! Changed every goddamned setting, killed my old printer, can't find the second monitor, changed the start menu, power settings. FUCK YOU MICROSOFT, YOU ARE DUMBFUCK SHITHEADS TO NOT ALLOW ME THE FREEDOM TO OWN MY OWN COMPUTER! And who the fuck in the government allowed this shit to happen?? The land of the free, my ass.5
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How the fuck you people do load testing ?
Don't tell me JMeter, it's useless as it doesn't represent an actual browser session...
I'm not taliong "test APIs" but the whole user experiance....
Can't find a single tool which does it at 1000+ sessions....7 -
Ok. As a tech reference tool
I'm hooked on chatgpt
You just have to double-check what it in outputs
Fuck you in people for shelving it over and over it's awesome3 -
Is there ever a fucking reason to do a get_attrs call in python when you could just use a fucking explicit dict or just idk use the fucking typing system to implement a fucking interface? Like why the fuck should anyone ever be using get_attrs and strings to diddle objects?2
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Get my lightweight WASM "runtime" thing to work properly.
Don't you just hate all the emscringtem glue code? Yes, me too. And fuck WASI.8 -
I have Avira Password Manager and for 3 days now I can't access it because they send a verification code to the phone but that code was never received... FUCK YOU AVIRA5
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Windows updated and that ugly news and interests thing on the task bar got turned back on again. Its happening too often to be mad about it. Its just annoying to check which settings microsoft decided to change because fuck what you want. We have to build a user base weather you want it or not. I dread updating to windows 11..5
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It just never works when you try to set up self hostet php apps never theyre all shit they never print any useful errors they just randomly pass wrong args they use fucking ioncube fuck everything6
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To the slackers on this team - fuck you all.
I know you don’t work during the day. I’m either getting another job or moving into management, and god help you if either happens. Your current manager has been watching you like a hawk, but he’s scared of attrition. But if his manager pushes him on it he’ll PIP you all. He hates you too.
If I get a new job - our manager’s manager will know, our manager will get pressure to PIP you, and you’ll endure months of hell while every stakeholder with deadlines realizes they can tighten the screws on you and if you don’t respond well you’ll be seen as even bigger fuckups.
If I move into management - PIPs incoming. You’ve made my life hell. But I’m going to make sure you’re stuck in this hell with me for as long as possible. That transfer you wanted? Fuck no, you will maintain this legacy system under increasingly unreasonable deadlines until you quit. Should’ve done your work back when there was still time. And until you quit, it will be torture. I plan on asking for constant status updates that are sure to break your flow. And when you quit - better leave us off those references.
Fuck you. The rest of the team is working overtime because of your shitty personality. I know you like this job - get ready to lose it and watch everyone who’s been chomping at the bit to make your life miserable take swings at you.7 -
Tired of having to copy-paste channel names in YouTube stream live chat for proper mentioning? Here's the thing for you.
https://greasyfork.org/en/scripts/...
Use Violentmonkey or Tampermonkey to embed this userscript.
Also, fuck you, YouTube. Fix your shit already! -
Spent months writing up a model and fine tuning, trained on complex image data (all we had to work with), to work well with what it needed to do.
Only to have “subject matter experts” be like: why don’t you use PCA and K Nearest Neighbours.
The fuck do you think the baseline was written with? -
It takes so much effort to make an input group wrapper reactive in Angular. The whole angular form module is so fucking annoying to deal with. "Angular is more opinionated". Fuck you. Angular leaves so many escape hatches so that devs would do the same thing in a million different ways. It's ironic that reactive form is never reactive.
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Me: I’m having trouble filling out the state tax form online. The form won’t let me check the box “I live in X city.”
HR: You don’t have to fill out the form if it doesn’t apply to you.
Me: Why are you treating me like an idiot? And why the fuck are you making assumptions about where I live? -
Fuck I'm crazy and need to enable you to do new things that don't mess with your principles or distress youso you do new things and uncrazy me13
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senior: it should only take 30 seconds to replace multiple display strings across our code base
well it would be nice if they'd do it then, and somehow i don't think that 30 seconds included checking your work and making sure you don't fuck up other instances of those strings (e.g. in variable names, etc)
maybe you got a clever enough regex to only hit exactly what you want :shrug:1 -
postman to manually check api endpoint works
try again later, doing what you think was the exact same shit, which you've documented, reread your document get 404
fuck csrf
use debugger
find out its returning a 404 when the code i added fails, welp4 -
Prolific, just because their product gets pirated, make all their old devices incompatible with Winodows 10! So you have to use a windows 7 driver! What a bunch of wankers! How the fuck dare you invalidate hardware YOU sold only recently, fucking over your customer, because YOU cant prosecute knock off coming from the far east, you cunts!
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You know
I think people are delusional
In so many ways
They need to stop trying to get blood from a stone
Because whatever the fuck some assholes may have been doing making shit more miserable is not the way to accomplish anything
It's a way to get hurt5