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Search - "dark matter"
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*In Office
Coworker raises his head, looks at boss: "I'm leaving".
Boss raises head looks at coworker: "Ok".
All this took 5 seconds,..the weirdest 5 seconds of my life10 -
Had a bit of time on my hands and this was the result. Shaking my head. I should never be left free and alone. Lol.9
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This is Facebook Messenger. And thats a fuckin Advert. Fuckin adverts in my fuckin inbox. For fuck me's sake, What the fuck17
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Wrote my friend Sam a letter when I was still working in support. I think it still holds up today.
---
Dear Sam,
I understand that you will join us in our overseas office. Congratulations on landing that job. It’s good steady work. I’ve been doing it for the last ten years.
Your still young so maybe I can give you some little wisdom that will help you in your working years to come.
Let me begin by shedding some light on phone calls.
I try. I really do try Sam. But it is getting so hard for me to hold back the rage that builds up during certain phone calls. Especially the ‘Sorry, I just don’t know anything about computers! -giggle-’ ones.
Those are the times that I have no access to what they see. I’ve no team-viewer, can not take over that screen in any other way. And why-oh-why can I not take over that terminal session dear Sam? It’s because the caller can not double-click an icon or find a terminal session number.
And what is the reason for this? Because they ‘just don’t know anything about computers! -giggle-’. This is a sort of get-out-of-jail-free card. Beware of these callers Sam.
There is nothing so nerve-wrecking then finding yourself at the mercy of people describing Internet Explorer (do not even get me started) as ‘the big ‘E’, if they use Chrome for their webmail then they most likely will say ‘Mail’ if they mean Chrome. There is no logic Sam. That is just the way these people work.
They will suck all enjoyment out of your work. They will make you want to hunt them down in dark office hallways and show them your tears Sam. Because cry you will.
Sure, I understand that not everyone can be tech savvy. Why, if everyone would be, where would that leave us? No. I love the technologically challenged. They put the fiber in my internet. They make me LOL for real. After the initial anger subsides anyway.
But just below that well-willing folk, on the other side of that border… there they dwell: Management.
Nice cars, suits and iphones Sam. First thing a new manager will require is a brand spanking new business-card. It will hold his/her new title. Then an iphone or overpriced android model will follow suit.
Then they will barge into your office, holding it like it’s the next best thing since sliced bread.
Any manager will automatically assume that you will drop anything you are doing at the present moment to acknowledge the presence of greatness. Failing to do so will result in awkward yet fulfilling situations. I recommend that you do not take your hands of the keyboard and give only the slightest of nods after 5 minutes of complete silence and glaring.
Well… you feel the glare. You do not glare yourself. You do not break eye-contact with the monitor. It does not even matter if you are typing for real or not. I once clicked away happily for 5 minutes. I just typed ‘he is still there’ over and over again. Do not break down Sam. This moment will decide your relationship with this individual.
After the nod there will be a flood of words aimed in your general direction. You can disregard anything that is said. It boils down to ‘can not operate device’.
You then take the device from this person and put it next to you on your desk. You’ll ask the name of this simpleton, write it down on a sticky-note, slap that on the phone. Then you’ll write a random date in the not so near future on another sticky and hand that to the bewildered person in front of you.
It will usually utter some incoherent words about ‘needing, time or but’ (I find that ‘but’is a word they like. They tend to use it three or four times consecutive before you usher them through the door).
Now you’ve won Sam. Well… not really. But it will feel good, I can guarantee that.
This must do for now. A new suit is glaring at me for the last five minutes.
Felt good to do something productive with this time.
Take care,
Baltasar
P.s. I just noticed that there is some foam around his mouth. So if you encounter this, don’t worry: it seems to be perfectly normal.13 -
!dev
The moment I saw a bird laying on the balcony, unresponsive, I dropped everything.
The balcony has glass walls, which the bird hit pretty hard against. It (I don't know the gender) was disoriented, shaking, and totally out of it.
It was almost night, and I can feel a few drops of rain, a sign of, well, more rain.
So I took it in, did some research, left it inside a quiet dark box with a heating mat on the bottom. It slowly calmed down. We slept overnight, listening to the rain outside, thinking about what would've happened if the bird hit, let's say, somewhere else.
It would've not have any help, or care whatsoever. It would die slowly, having a concussion and oh my gosh my efforts doesn't matter anyway this is the way of life there are bird striking windows everyday and I can't help it Holy noodles I should remove windows from every computer in the house...
I was like this the entire night.
The next morning I discovered that the bird was awake, but something was wrong. The bird was still disoriented. Then I discovered something. Gosh, how did I miss it?
The left eye was completely swollen, which had caused the imbalanced walk, which means that it could not fly.
(*Rapidly typing on phone*) come on where is the nearest wildlife rehabilitation centre....
Initially I thought that the bird just needed to recover, I was wrong. It needs professional help ASAP.
To the SUV! (https://myinstants.com/instant/...)
We went to the other corner of the town. Seriously, we were at the southeast part of town, and we have to drive to the northwest.
It took 15 minutes, but we finally got there. I dropped it off and got home. I will never see that bird again in my entire life.
I don't know what will happen to it.
Good luck out there, little bird.
So... That was my weekend. Here comes Monday...7 -
Conversations I've genuinely had at work:
Me: "Do you want some advice understanding that function?"
Dev: "Yeah, please!"
Me: "Get a plastic bag and some super glue..."
Dev: "I think I'm seeing the light at the end of the tunnel!"
Me: "It's just the train of mental bitchslaps coming in the other direction."
... Some time later
Dev:"You were right... "
Dev: "If the system is so unstable, how does it keep working?"
Me: "Do you see any goats in the office?"
Dev: "Uhm no... Why would there be goats?"
Me: "There aren't, now, we ran out."
Dev: "The hell are you talking about?"
Me: "We just sacrifice our own blood to Cthulhu these days, it's cleaner and we didn't have to pay to have all the goats blood and waste matter to be cleaned up. That and it was needlessly cruel to the poor goats and that is why there is no goats and despite conventional logic the app continues to work."
Dev: "So what language is the web app written in?"
Me: "You need to understand I inherited this project, I had nothing to do with it's spawning..."
Dev: "OK, that sounds ominous... How bad is it?"
Me: "Java..."
Dev: "..."
Dev: "So what's it like working on this project? What should I expect?"
Me: "You'll call your grandmother during your lunch break just to know there's a world beyond this project. You'll go home, nose bleeding and you are gonna sit in the shower and rock back and forth, holding yourself and feeling like you're suffering imposter syndrome. You'll question why you joined this team and it'll get inside your head til it's all you think about..."
Dev: "Damn man, why are you still on it?"
Me: "Stockholm syndrome, it's too late for me..."
PM: "You're such a dark person, we're not gonna find you hanging from the lights one day are we?"
Me: "Impossible, we use those industrial fluorescent strip lights, there's no cord to hang from."
PM: "That really wasn't the comforting answer I was looking for."
Head of department: "So I need to apologize, you were never meant to be left on your to manage the product on your own, it's something someone way more senior should have been doing and we reassigned him. It wasn't professional of us, it wasn't fair of us, we're sorry. Truth be told,we're impressed you've not gone mad."
Me: "I think I have. Wibble."
A card goes round work for a sick member of staff I've never met.
Me: "How would you describe her condition?"
Dev: "She said that she 'survived' the surgery."
Me: "Yeah, I'm not great at being appropriate but even I think writing 'glad to hear that you are not dead' in a get well soon card isn't the done thing."5 -
So im here with this lovely girl on my chest and all i can think of is why i got a Null Pointer exception and why in the fudge im lying here with this woman instead of fixing that.
Oh, maybe its because i spend 27 hours of the available 24 hours in a freakin day writing code whilst struggling to give her attention. She deserves this moment. She's my best Fragment...Friend, she's my best Friend.10 -
My friend who is new to Android App Dev was trying to make a simple app that programmatically takes a pic then sends it as an MMS. He opened Stack Overflow, copied code and i heard him murmur "hmm this is simple". Knowing the future, and the wrath of Android Studio, i leaned into my seat and waited. 2 hours later i knew Andy Studio had pissed all over him and it was written all over his face. I walked past him as if to go to the toilet then back again, his screen was blood red with errors and my heart danced and sang.
3 hours later i was out of the room and he sent me a text saying "I give up". I replied, "well tbh, im suprised it took you that long"
Thank you Android Studio for showing all those who think all we do is copy and paste code that they are freakin retards.4 -
[Dark Rant]
I'm sick of this stupid tech world.
Don't get me wrong, I love tech. I just can't stand anymore the global brainwashing that we're part of.
Think about all the huge companies making profit on our data. For a better service, yeah sure, but do we really understand what the cost is?
Ok sure, you don't care about your data because you trust these companies and the advantages are all worth it. What about the fact that we are all forced to buy the next new smartphone after 2 years?
Like if removable batteries were a problem for us, users. Or like the audio jack. Because now someone decided that the pricey wireless headphones are Just What You Need™.
Do you think you own your smartphone?
No, you don't. You are paying a bunch of money for something that soon will be just a useless brick of glass and metal which you can't repair. But you'll be happy anyway.
Someone is so happy to the point that they will defend their favorite company, doesn't matter how they decided to stick it into their ass.
Open your eyes, you've been brainwashed.25 -
Everyone is ranting/posting about Stephen Hawking RIP &such...
And I'm just sitting here, waiting for his chair to take over the world & shit to hit the fan.. O.O
P.S. no discrespect meant to the guy, I think he was awesome..14 -
New job on the horizon after being unemployed for a couple of months. Moving away from full-stack a bit to focus in on front-end stuff. Cool. Cool, cool, cool. Expect rage-filled rants in the near future 👌
Taking some time off was beneficial in all kinds of ways: got out of long term toxic relationship, got in betterer shape, learned stuff I'm actually interested in, mental health improved massively along with self-esteem, and I reconnected with friends and family. I'm actually enjoying life again. Don't get me wrong though, I had to claw my way out of a pretty dark hole... But I'm starting to think I fucking made it. This is a new start and I'm excited.
Fuck being in a toxic relationship.
Fuck working a job that is killing you.
If you're reading this and feel stuck: you deserve better. Listen to your gut, only you know what kind of life is good for you. It doesn't matter if it's a good job by every possible standard if it's making you miserable! A relationship exists to help you grow, to give you energy, to cultivate love. Sure, you'll go through bad times but if it's pathologically bad it won't get better on it's own. Trust me, I waited years for things to get better.
Anyways, good luck with whatever is challenging you right now, big or small. 😘6 -
Friend: I really dont see how Java and JavaScript are different
Me: *Several minutes explaining the differences
Friend: Ok, ok, but if i write 'JAVA' scripts, im a JavaScript programmer right?
Me: No, you're an asshole3 -
*In a lecture
Lecturer: Consequences of Distributed Systems
Students: **attentive as fudge**
Lecturer: Heteroginity
Students:
Lecturer: Independent Failures
Students:
Lecturer: No global 'COCK'
Students: WHOOOOA, global what?...that escalated fast
Lecturer: I mean no global 'CLOCK'
Students: yeah right, can we use cock though?2 -
Me: *browsing devRant*
Friend who's on every Social Media paltform: what's that?
Me: devRant
Friend: *taking out phone* I need to join
Me: its for developers
Friend: *putting back phone in pocket* Ooh
Me: *grinning wildy in my sweet little heart* *yes you piece of shit. This one's not for you*
It feels good to have a corner thats not for everyone3 -
I have to say, Kotlin is getting interesting now. At first i was like "WTF is this shit", but now im like "TF, did i just create a data class with 2 lines of code as opposed to the 14 i would have using JAVA? TF you've been Kotlin?"
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I think I might change my middle name to "I told you so"
Couple of weeks ago I proposed integrating a daily process job into an existing WPF application (details of what+why would be too long to explain) and the manager suggested I make the changes
Me: "I can do it, but Jay has the most experience with that application. I don't have his WPF skills"
Mgr: "How hard can WPF be? If it uses the MVVM pattern, it should be a snap."
Me: "Its nearly an 8 year old WPF project with several chefs in that kitchen. I pretty sure I could figure it out, but that is a difference between 2 weeks and 2 days. Integration is pretty straight forward, Jay could probably do it in a day."
DevA: "WPF is easy. MVVM makes it even easier. I worked on the shipping app."
Me: "That's was a brand new, single page app, but yea, it should be easy."
DevB: "WPF has been around a long time and the tools have really matured. I don't understand what is so difficult."
Me: "I didn't say anything would be difficult, I know with that application, there is going to be complexity we need to figure out."
DevB: "It uses the MVVM, so all we need is the user control, a view model, controller, and its done."
DevA: "Sounds easy to me."
Mgr: "If you need more time to work on the vendor project, I'll have DevB work on the integration."
<yesterday>
Me: "How is the integration going?"
DevB: "This app is a mess. I have no idea how they got the control collections to work. If I hard-code everything, I can get it to work. This dynamic stuff is so confusing. Then there is the styling. Its uses dark mode, but no matter what I do, my controls show up in light mode."
Me: "The app uses Prism, so the control configuration is in, or around, the startup code."
DevB: "That makes sense. Will it fix the styling too?"
Me: "I have no idea. When I looked at it, some controls loaded the styles from the main resource, other's have it hard-coded. Different chefs in the kitchen, I guess. How far have you got?"
DevB: "I've created invoice button. That is as far as I got"
Me: "I'm finished with the vendor project and I'll be wrapping up the documentation today. I can try to help next week."
DevB: "Thanks. I think we might have to get Jay to help if we can't figure this out."
Me: "Good idea"
Two weeks and only a button. A button? I miss Delphi.3 -
Whelp. I started making a very simple website with a single-page design, which I intended to use for managing my own personal knowledge on a particular subject matter, with some basic categorization features and a simple rich text editor for entering data. Partly as an exercise in web development, and partly due to not being happy with existing options out there. All was going well...
...and then feature creep happened. Now I have implemented support for multiple users with different access levels; user profiles; encrypted login system (and encrypted cookies that contain no sensitive data lol) and session handling according to (perceived) best practices; secure password recovery; user-management interface for admins; public, private and group-based sections with multiple categories and posts in each category that can be sorted by sort order value or drag and drop; custom user-created groups where they can give other users access to their sections; notifications; context menus for everything; post & user flagging system, moderation queue and support system; post revisions with comparison between different revisions; support for mobile devices and touch/swipe gestures to open/close menus or navigate between posts; easily extendible css themes with two different dark themes and one ugly as heck light theme; lazy loading of images in posts that won't load until you actually open them; auto-saving of posts in case of browser crash or accidental navigation away from page; plus various other small stuff like syntax highlighting for code, internal post linking, favouriting of posts, free-text filter, no-javascript mode, invitation system, secure (yeah right) image uploading, post-locking...
On my TODO-list: Comment and/or upvote system, spoiler tag, GDPR compliance (if I ever launch it haha), data-limits, a simple user action log for admins/moderators, overall improved security measures, refactor various controllers, clean up the code...
It STILL uses a single-page design, and the amount of feature requests (and bugs) added to my Trello board increases exponentially with every passing week. No other living person has seen the website yet, and at the pace I'm going, humanity will have gone through at least one major extinction event before I consider it "done" enough to show anyone.
help4 -
Who are devranters?
I know many devs and very few of them run Linux as their primary OS. And I've never met a single one using Arch.
Also, hardly any use Vim as their primary IDE...or even editor.
Yet, if DevRant was my first introduction to devs I'd be down Best Buy looking for a laptop (why so many laptops here?) running Arch and Vim as my word processor.
Don't misunderstand me---I have nothing against Arch and Vim. I don't give a rat's arse about the OS on my machine as I'm mostly in apps. I'm sure Arch would be fine. And whatever floats anyone's boat is fine by me.
But where are all the devs maintaining VB6 apps using XP? Is the community inclusive enough to welcome them?
Where are the "dark matter" devs? Lurking? Speak up!
Now, it may be that, say, China and India run on Arch Linux and Vim and I have a limited perspective. If so, Wow! My eyes are opened.10 -
Conversations with SQL Server:
Me: TRUNCATE TABLE users;
SQLServer: Okie dokie, Command(s) completed successfully
Me: WTF SQL, u didn't even ask for confirmation
SQLServer: Well, you did type 'TRUNCATE' then 'TABLE' then 'users' didn't you. I mean how much confirmation do you need you prick.2 -
Honestly?
No way.
No matter what you give up for your family and friends.
It's never enough.
"You're always tired"
"You're not interested enough in my/our stuff"
"No wonder you won't proceed with your carrier, when you act like that"
C'mooooooon!
Give me a chance to build up a regular life.
Most Ppl = Egotistical piles of crap.
Sorry for this dark rant :/2 -
Been watching The Lord of the Rings trilogy since yesterday for the third time in my life. I shed a tear at the end. That movie is as good today as it was 15 years ago. Awesome.
Now, to make this post relevant, im going to close VLC media player, open Android Studio and go on a Kotlin (which is becoming more and more like Gandalf the White) journey2 -
Today on forgotten games – Vangers.
Even though the game is extremely hard and very, very frustrating, it somehow has an ability to make you obsessed with it. A very complex pieces of information, either carefully crafted or accidentally emerged from the void, delivered straight to your brain, making you an addict. If you play it and not delete it after five minutes, there is no way back – you better get used to new, different you.
There are many hard but addictive games based on simple mechanics, but Vangers is a different story. Compared to Vangers, Dark Souls seems nice, simple and easy casual game.
One can easily imagine "the hardest game possible", but all of them simply makes you delete the game and not to play it at all. Vangers precisely balance over this, achieving a very fragile equilibrium, being hard enough to frustrate you like no other game does, but not hard enough to simply make you quit instantly. While doing so, the game makes you a junkie, addicted to its eerie psychedelic nature.
This game spits in your face. This game makes you a slave, a desperate addict. All of your previous gaming skill, and speedrun experience doesn't matter.
The plot roughly goes like this: humans fucked up while experimenting with portals and accidentally discovered an advanced hivemind race. Trying to escape they fuck up spacetime and the two incompatible civilizations annihilate each other, creating a primal soup of creatures, from which the whole new world emerges. So there are many different strange creatures trying to survive in fucked spacetime where incompatible worlds are forcefully fused together, and you are the Vanger, one of many other Vangers trying to figure out what they are and how they was created.
The game features a voxel, fully-destructible world mapped on a torus. The game lore and terminology are extremely complex, and no one will explain it to you, you have to figure everything out yourself. Skip the dialog and no one will repeat it, you're on your own now.
Every playthrough is different. There are very many game mechanics and play styles available.
Everything in the game including complex rendering engine was written in C and Assembler back in 1998.
There are two types of Vangers players: the ones who was able to escape early and the ones who think that Vangers is the best game of all time. This says it all.
Last warning – DON'T PLAY THIS GAME. You better watch some playthrough on youtube.12 -
Instagram: "Jill liked your post"
Me: F off
Twitter: "Chris liked your tweet"
Me: WTF do i care
devRant: "Jamie liked your comment"* and you're getting stickers for it*
Me: "Wait, what?... You're alright devRant, you're alright"4 -
Things I wish I knew when I was younger:
- no matter how clean your teeth are, bad breath won't go away until you clean your tongue. Buy a tongue cleaner and use it after you brush your teeth
- whitening toothpastes don't work, while desensitizing ones work well.
- after you brush your teeth, spit but do NOT rinse!
- when brushing your teeth, keep the toothbrush angled 45 degrees. The bristle ends should touch the area where your gums meet your teeth.
- use sunscreen every morning.
- don't waste money on acne-treating products unless they contain salicylic acid, benzoyl peroxide, tretinoin or adapalene.
- if you want to lose weight, you have to eat MORE, not less. But, that “more” should be protein.
- showering every morning feels like “humanity restored” thing from Dark Souls. Also, clean your damn room and wash your damn windows.
- APS-C DSLR cameras make no sense. For their weight, you can get a full-frame camera, and for their price you can get an APS-C mirrorless cam that will be way lighter.
- If you want a damn thing, save up and buy that damn thing. Don't buy the alternative thing you don't want. You'll be asking “what if” till you either die or buy the original damn thing.
- people aren't replaceable, but many people can fit their designated role. Not being able to replace your ex-boyfriend with his exact copy doesn't mean no one else can be your boyfriend.
- try a MacBook & iPhone as soon as you can to check whether it's your thing or not, because if it is, oh boy are you in for a treat.
- added sugar is evil, but it's beneficial for the economy. It makes you fat, so you need a car, so you buy fuel. Also, you feel guilty because you're fat, so you buy diet products & things to compensate because you hate your reflection in the mirror. You also pay medical fees to treat your newly developed health problems, and you die a day before retirement. Everyone makes a buck on you eating added sugar but you.
- you can use the freshly removed sticker to remove the sticky residue left by that same sticker.
- static typing doesn't solve jack shit.3 -
Sometimes when i drop my fone, break something or say something stupid i yearn for a real life "Ctrl + Z", and just undo that shit right quick.5
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I value our most senior developer. His code is certainly clean and structured. He is the ultimate at KISS. However he's not a fan of testing and instead just says, well, did it compile? No matter how much I show him how great testing is, he comes back with how it's pretty unnecessary. Somehow, in the deep dark parts of the web, he finds articles that comply with his standing. I'm okay with him not making tests, I do it myself. But then when working extending or implementing his code, many of my parts are untestable because the parents are. Oye.6
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Fuck motherfucking android 8 fucking sideways. And Huawei for that matter too.
My battery drains like 30% faster since the update from 7.0, with even more app limiting than in 7. I've already ranted about UI stuff, but that is negligible compared to this bullshit.
Also, auto brightness is broken and it keeps blinding me fora few seconds in the dark, and choosing way too much brightness.
I've loved my otherworldly battery life, now I feel like an apple user with 4k mah.
I used to get one and a half day battery, now I barely get through the day.11 -
Happy New year
May you have a year that is filled with love and bugs, laughter and debugging , brightness and dark theme , hope and distro hopping and little less windows vs linux shit 😂 please arch guys you too 🙄😝
Wish you all a great year 😅😛
I rarely post anything but I'm pretty active reading every shit post here. we fucking have a great community here. Few people are going through some real shit , hey you, things will get better don't lose hope but don't just wait on it , things don't ever get better by just wishing. Do what has to be done no matter how hard that decision can be.
Cut all those toxic people from your life doesn't matter who they're. You all deserve better
Believe in yourself. Everyone is going through some real shit. Keep fighting. Live for yourself.
You got only one life live upto your fill potential.
Regret is the worst thing so do whatever the fuck you want to do.
Never give up doesn't matter what you're going through.
And in the end may you "live" all the days of your life. -
Well, everytime i say hie to a random girl, i swear they look at my shoes first, so i have resolved to stick my upcoming devRant stickers onto my shoes instead of my laptop9
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Interned at a company where i was developing desktop applications and also taking care of user support (general user support, nothing to do with the software i was developing).
Do you know how frustrating it is to get off your desk and leave an unfinished line of code just to go and find out that the 'my computer froze' issue was simply an improperly plugged in mouse. 😠😠
Fart on you user2 -
Just started using the Dark Reader extension for Firefox. Where has this been my whole life! The entire internet is now dark theme no matter what haha! My eyes are in heaven.
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When he lied about my words and tried to blame me for everything. He is a master of dark psychology, he made the entire department went crazy arguing about something that don't even matter at the time.
He constantly play victim card in every situation. I argued with him that day.
(Actually I shouldn't do that , I should have ask him "are you good" and try to be empathetic to him because we know indeed that he need help. He crave for attentions.)3 -
Am i the only one who finds it difficult to code whilst listening to music on my earphones? I fond it difficult to concentrate9
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I swear on a Fragment's 'Life'cycle, you can only get better at developing with each project you undertake...4
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Ubuntu 20.4 is not very cool.
It might look "polished" in some (barely noticeable) areas , which doesn't matter to me as i already used better themes and icon packs. Moreover they tried make ui and icons flwt which looks terrible. It feels like to ubuntu's designers , flat= every icon in a dark gray color. Am not a fan of black topbar either, the old darkish looked much better
The worst thing is that now i have to go through multiple start screens since my laptop is dualboot :/ .
Its now like : black screen > (hp+ubuntu logo) + grub > (hp) > (hp+ubuntu logo + loading icon) > lockscreen > my system
Earlier it was just hp> grub>lockscreen>my system. The fast start up was one of my favourite features of Ubuntu, now its a million loading screens. The lockscreen is cool tho6 -
Why the hell does my Samsung phone prevent me from uninstalling the Facebook app and instead offers me to disable it? WTF, NO, i want it freakin gone.
Bitch, Visibility: Hidden & Visibility: Gone are two different things.2 -
Is software development a field you can spend your entire life in or its like professional football, the older you get and companies don't want you anymore and they're seeking young talent?
I need to know where i might end up in 20 years time5 -
Not dev related so don't shoot me. If you like writing I figure you maybe might enjoy this and thought I'd share.
This is a section from an unfinished novel about 2050s America, set in a corporate subsidized mega-fevela sprawling across washington state, ruled by gangs and patrolled by the officers of a bankrupt nation suffering through austerity and on-and-off again spasms of mass civil conflict.
"Averice - Sex, drugs, and vice, in the downfall and dying days of america."
we lived in a smoke government, where everything was bullshit they blew up your ass so you could continue make believe while
you were bent over with your head in the hole in the ground you mistook for your ass to start with. And if you questioned it all, one bit, the mouth organ of the state would command
hate upon you, like an old latin curse, with a lexicon armada of phrases like "terrorist", and "troubled individual" to character assassinate you by drowning you in the humbling river of societies mass delusion giver, those two sweet letters "TV."
No, we were on the industry edge here, inventing better bait to catch what the state politiburo labelled 'bandits', all for what?
It had, in later years become fashionable to call those who didn't want to be stolen from any more, projected as it were, "thieves", in the same fashion as those in the middle east, defending
their homeland from foreigners, were labelled "insurgents." Tyranny had not so long ago grown a sense of irony it would seem.
And if you became enemy number one of the state, as thousands were, you would spend your days on the run, always looking over your
shoulder for the states vanish vans--black escalades with men in dark suits and mirrored glasses, like bugmen with shiny inhuman, and inscrutable eyes full of alien malice.
These were sordid summers, full of plastic playhouses where the cost of a days wages you could lay with a synthetic lover and pay away the days tense tax for a good lay, and forget your toils and troubles. And so many were kept in poverty because of easy habit and routine that they forget they were not living.
But for me, I had none of it. I preferred the troubled thing on the corner when I could coax one into my state issued sedan. She was sulky, with bright blonde curls, 19, maybe 20, with empty eyes, as if watching some invisible horizon. And in the glow of the blue neon, among the wet sidewalks, and trash, she leaned into my car. No words were exchanged. I nodded, and
she got into the car, a miniskirt, and slinky little handbag.
This was no more than state business with a bureau guy like me, and for her, little more than the prison trade taken public.
She huffed some powder and climbed spraddle leg onto my lap, grabbing me along my jawline, eyes locked onto the depths of my soul, and
for the next ten minutes as she moved on top of me, I was motionless property while my lusts became animal, and she, my cream cup.
After, I arrested her to the standard protests, but she new the game and quickly hushed. This was the verdant arithmetic of the state. I was awarded x amount of pension points for every criminal, no matter how, and it was no gentle hand, not the judge, not the jury, or the executioner of their will. It was the rigid touch of a long arm, dislocated from the law, and now, like frankenstein's monster, cobbled onto the mechanism of the state not unlike the manner of a combine harvester.
We were the owners of all by virtue of all we could take, and we took all we could get. The serial romeos of state police power, romancing
the unwilling citizenry with televised patriotism and five minute power talks at the beginning of the corporate day.
It could be paradise or a wasteland if we wanted it to be. And for a time it was.
Edit: devrant always breaks my formatting. sigh. -
And so the land was finally rid of the years-long plague that had desolated a once great nation. The weary denizens let out a sigh of relief, thanking their lucky stars for this new-found peace. But it was only the beggining...
For although the enemy had been defeated, it's undoing was brought about by profane arcana of a much more insidious, dark nature. In saving themselves, the fools had in truth sold their very souls.
"Grandiose... " he muttered villanously between his teeth, fixed on a wolfish, most somber grin.
"Like lambs to the slaughter, my Lord" his assistant verbally circle-jackaloped him off, to great bottock-suckling effect.
"They will soon bow down to me... " so begat his five-hour-long expository monologue, a scheme only as devious as it was needlessly complex "and all the ass in the province shall be mine!!"
Indeed, all unfolded as it was foretold: unleashing the first spell of Mass Desacration would only lead to it being perfected, further corrupted, twisted, and molded into the girthiest, gnarled, grandemonic phallus of anal destruction, by which the souls of an entire people would be bound to the sexually distorted whims of an ancestral eldritch degenerate.
Once uppon a time, they were warned, but laughed at our harbinger -- and as penance, we abandoned them to their black fates. The extremity of the grave peril looming over their every orifice seemed a rather guffawable matter to them... and so was to us the brutal, inter-continental violation that swiftly befell theirs, most precious of human cavities.
Suffice to say, their anus shall never fully recover.
As for Wizard James, he was summarily executed via automobile-assisted castration, his jagged testicles mercilessly crushed under the weight of a thousand oxes. But that is a story for another day.11 -
I could almost swear, when Windows 10 is ready to install updates on my PC it starts slowing it down so i can restart it and then it can proceed installing them.🤔
but oh well...thats too far fetched1 -
Leave JAVA TF alone. You ungrateful bastards. Leaving your long time love for these small ass small houses of programming languages1