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I hired a woman for senior quality assurance two weeks ago. Impressive resume, great interview, but I was met with some pseudo-sexist puzzled looks in the dev team.
Meeting today. Boss: "Why is the database cluster not working properly?"
Team devs: "We've tried diagnosing the problem, but we can't really find it. It keeps being under high load."
New QA: "It might have something to do with the way you developers write queries".
She pulls up a bunch of code examples with dozens of joins and orderings on unindexed columns, explains that you shouldn't call queries from within looping constructs, that it's smart to limit the data with constraints and aggregations, hints at where to actually place indexes, how not to drag the whole DB to the frontend and process it in VueJS, etc...
New QA: "I've already put the tasks for refactoring the queries in Asana"
I'm grinning, because finally... finally I'm not alone in my crusade anymore.
Boss: "Yeah but that's just that code quality nonsense Bittersweet always keeps nagging about. Why is the database not working? Can't we just add more thingies to the cluster? That would be easier than rewriting the code, right?"
Dev team: "Yes... yes. We could try a few more of these aws rds db.m4.10xlarge thingies. That will solve it."
QA looks pissed off, stands up: "No. These queries... they touch the database in so many places, and so violently, that it has to go to therapy. That's why it's down. It just can't take the abuse anymore. You could add more little brothers and sisters to the equation, but damn that would be cruel right? Not to mention that therapy isn't exactly cheap!"
Dev team looks annoyed at me. My boss looks even more annoyed at me. "You hired this one?"
I keep grinning, and I nod.
"I might have offered her a permanent contract"46 -
Got a phone interview for a backend dev job in an opsec company.
Interviewer:
This is a very serious and prestigious position, we take care of the most important bits of code.
*Proceeds to talk introductory nonsense*
Interviewer:
Do you know what a DNS is?
Me:
Yes, of course! DNS stands for Domain Name System.... Blah blah blah... I explain about the servers, about hosts file, about DNS spoofing and everything else possible on this topic.
Interviewer:
See, I was patient with you - letting you finish. I'm not sure what you're talking about and where you got it from, but a DNS is that line in the browser where you type the site's name.
He didn't ask any more questions, just told me that they'll get back to me. I asked not to do that.
Three weeks later I got an email claiming that I'm not qualified.44 -
I actually clicked past this, as per habit, before I reacted. Best EULA I've ever seen!
(In case anyone doesn't know: "Lorem ipsum" is a nonsense place holder text mostly used to try out layouts.)
10 -
Pain the ass sales guy walks into my office uninvited. Looks at one of my screens which has sftp copying a lot of files and spewing out each one. He asks what that "nonsense" is.
I politely tell him that it is all his sales data and I am deleting it. At which point I got up and went to lunch with no further discussion.
The next phone call I received was from my boss asking me to stop fucking with the sales people. I hope he learned to knock after this.5 -
FINALLY
GODDAMNED
FIXED
I'VE SPENT OVER A GODDAMN WEEK SWIMMING THROUGH DEMON EXCREMENT WITH A MAGNIFYING GLASS TRYING TO FIND THE SOURCE OF THIS SHIT.
I FINALLY FOUND IT. IN A FUCKING. CONDITIONAL. OVERLOAD. OF A MODEL GETTER.
THAT ABSOLUTE NONSENSE RETURNS EITHER THE REQUESTED COLUMN FROM THE DATABASE, OR AN ENTIRELY FUCKING DIFFERENT COLUMN, ALL DEPENDING ON THE VALUE OF A THIRD FUCKING COLUMN.
HKJSDFASKFJ
TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE.
THE VALUE IT RETURNS. IS COMPLETELY WRONG. FOR ALMOST. EVERY. FUCKING. CASE.
BECAUSE THAT FIRST COLUMN? IT NEVER GETS UPDATED. EVER.
AND THIS DEALS WITH ACCOUNTING AND REAL GODDAMN MONEY.
AARRGHHHHH
WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?!28 -
Fuck MatLab. Fuck Mathworks. Why the fuck do I still have this fucking piece of shit on my computer? Even its logo makes me want to puke.
You think JavaScript is bad? Try MatLab, JavaScript will look like a saint.
You are still virgin? Try MatLab, it will fuck you hard.
Give me one fucking engineer who has to use MatLab and love its nonsense, I dare you!31 -
Fuck you, devs who quote Knuth:
"Premature optimization is the root of all evil"
I agree with the spirit of the quote. I agree that long-winded arguments comparing microsecond differences in performance between looping or matching constructs in a language syntax is almost always nonsense. Slightly slower code can even be preferable if it's significantly clearer, safer and easier to maintain.
But, two fucking points need to be made to you lazy quickfix hipsters trying to sell your undercooked spaghetti code as "al dente", just fucking admit that you had no clue what you were doing.
So here we go:
1. If you write neat correct code in one go, you don't need to spend time to optimize it. Takes time to learn the right patterns, but will save you time during the rest of your career.
2. If you quote Knuth, at least provide the context: "We should forget about small efficiencies, say about 97% of the time [...] Yet we should not pass up our opportunities in that critical 3%"
YES THAT CRITICAL 3% IS WHERE YOU MESSED UP.
I'll forgive you for disgorging your codevomit into this silly PR.
BUT YOU'RE QUOTING KNUTH IN YOUR DEFENSE?
Premature optimization is the root of all evil... 6300 SQL queries to show a little aggregate graph on the dashboard... HE WOULD FUCKING SLAP YOUR KEYBOARD IN HALF IN YOUR FACE.3 -
Manager: Feature C doesn’t work
Dev: We never built feature C
Manager: Nonsense, I remember feature C clearly!
Dev: It’s still in the backlog
Manager: But we had many meetings about it
Dev: Never got put on the board
Manager: Feature C is very important!
Dev: It was never assigned to anyone
Manager: What could possibly be more important than Feature C?
Dev: All the other features you placed on the board and assigned up until now
Manager: Well I need Feature C done asap! It should be top priority!
Dev: Ok then next sprint add feature C to the board and assign it to someone
*Next planning session manager leaves feature C in backlog in favour of other tickets*
*2 days later*
Manager: What is the status of feature C?
Dev: You opted to leave it in the backlog
Manager: BUT IT SHOULD BE TOP PRIORITY!
Dev: …9 -
Fucking fuck fuck fucker fucking fuck
What a dumbass guy seriously. I have this colleague in my office who refuses to create a new branch because that will "ruin the single straight line". Are you seriously fucking kidding me??? The noobest guy ever doesnt know a third git command other than pulling and committing fucking nonsense. Why use git then? Just go back to creating zip files are maintain code. Fuck that guy too who hired him and now because of this fucking asshole I am not able to carry on my work.
Such so-called "developers" should be strapped to the back of a horse and the horse made to run on a gravel road for fuck's sake.. Fuck you man 🖕24 -
I need to hide myself, my computer, programming skills and computer knowledge from people. Then only, I will be safe..
Friend: Heeey, you're good with computers right?
Me: No! 😑
Friend: Come-on bro. I know you are.
Me: What do you want?
Friend: I want you to check and book flights for me for country X.
Me: Are you ok? How does this have anything to do with someone being good with computers and stuff?
Friend: Haha, see? You're good with computers. *starts laughing. Anyway, since you're good, you can find the best prices. I know you know how to search sites and how to find things online.
Me: WTF?!?!!! All, you have to do is type in your search. If you don't like the results, you simply refine it.
Friend: See, all this tech stuff I'm not really good at it.
Me: But you're good at searching for other things online, right? Do the same for your flights.
*Picks my laptop and walks away.
How can a young man not be able to search for flights online but knows how to use several gadgets. Nonsense.9 -
Manager: So great news, we will also be building a new app this year!!
Dev: We only have 2 devs and we already struggling to maintain/build our current portfolio of applications. I don’t think we have the resources to support another.
Manager: Nonsense, this is a very small project management app that was requested by the CEO himself!
Dev: …We already have MS project, why can’t they just use that?
Manager: The executive team isn’t interested in learning MS Project, it’s way too complicated. They want us to build an internal version of MS Project one feature at a time so they can pick it up over time instead of getting overwhelmed with learning MS Project all at once. It also needs to have loads of customizable automation features so leadership doesn’t ever have to get “in the weeds” having to work with it. It needs to basically run itself!
Dev: …What about this is small?
Manager: Well that is the requirement.
Dev: …18 -
Real Story:
Manager: You have to add an extra section in the app to show more details.
Me: We are already showing so many unnecessary details. These changes are not required.
Manager: No !! You have to do it.
Me : Ok !!! So why can't we show it in the section where we are showing the other details. Why make a separate section for it.
Manager : No !! It won't be clearly visible to the user. Just do it.
So I added another section to show useless information that we are already showing it f**king everywhere else in the app.
So I released a new apk next day with the added features.
In meeting, our CTO goes through the app and ask manager....
" Why we have added an extra section for showing same details that we are showing everywhere else ???
Who approved this ?? This is nonsense !!! "
Here comes the fun part.
Manager : I don't know. I didn't ask for it. These changes were not there earlier.
And ask me.
"Who told you to make these changes ? "
I am like... F***k man you a***ole told me to do it even when i told you it will be nonsense.12 -
!!good news
!!great news
!!linux dev lappy recommendations?
So, @Root might finally have a job! Woo!
(Pending a background check, drug test, cavity search, ...)
I'm excited, and kind of giddy. It's an open-office setup, but the devs are chill, the boss is chill (reminds me a bit of myself thus far, just... nice), pay is decent too. Drive is hell, but everything else feels kinda cushy. The parent company is super-stuffy corporate and has an HR and red tape fetish, but supposedly I won't have to interact with them at all. I start as soon as all of the background check nonsense comes through. (Don't get me started on that, please.)
One of the questions that came up, however, is what type of system I wanted to use. I requested a Linux lappy, and that's sadly a bit beyond the parent company's nontechnical IT department. They asked me for links to a few specific machines on amazon for options. (MacBook Pro or equivalent)
That's where this question comes in: Which lappys make great dev machines and also have decent linux (Debian/Mint/Ubuntu) support? The role is backend Rails development + some devops, so I don't need super-fancy graphics, though I will be attaching a 4k (hopefully IPS) display because space and pretty colors.
Recommendations welcome, as I should get back to them today!43 -
Please for the love of god name your variables in a sensible way! How the FUCK am I supposed to read your shitcode if you decide to write 6 (!!!) nested loops with variables each named by exactly one character. With no comments whatsoever!
I would rather crack password hashes than this nonsense.
13 -
Just wanned to kill myself because my colleague wrote this misleading nonsense, i was totally confused and got lost inside code and then i found this source of evil.
City Country = new City();2 -
When your boss asks for a web application that has drag and drop, resize, popup, fade inand out, dynamic styling and mobile compatibility but must work on IE8
You feel like:
Mission: Go to the moon
Tools: Broom's stick
Yeah i'll just pretend to be a witch and fly away7 -
Really pissed of by tha Boss!
Working late with the project then next day, the Boss is talkin nonsense.....
When browsing I saw this, quite an ultimate view
12 -
Got basically nothing done yesterday because I was absolutely exhausted the entire day. Thanks, doxxing thread. But I couldn’t sleep anyway so whatever.
Told everyone at home that I wanted a really productive day tomorrow (today) because of it.
Guess what happened?
Endless fucking distractions.
Because of course.
• Cooking since apparently it’s my job.
• Extended computer repair and maintenance, since that’s apparently my job even when it’s not my computer.
• Conversations.
• Children following me.
• People paraphrasing politics.
• People summarizing stupid fail videos.
• People relating stupid prank videos.
• More conversations.
• Endless random nonsense comments from children.
• Endless noises from children’s toys, tablets, playing, etc.
• Children following me when I leave.
• Taking half an hour to order food instead of five minutes.
• Cleaning since nobody else ever does.
• Picking up toys since nobody else will and I’M FUCKING TIRED OF STEPPING ON AND TRIPPING OVER THEM.
• More fucking food prep.
• Endless random nonsense comments from children.
• More conversations.
Is it any wonder I’m so fucking pissed off every workday?
I can’t wait to move so I can have a fucking office with a fucking door and a fucking lock. And you know what? I’m going to splurge and install some fucking soundproofing, too.
WHY IS IT SO FUCKING HARD TO JUST LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!? I’M PAYING FOR YOUR FUCKING EVERYTHING. FUCK THE FUCK OFF!19 -
Headphones ON ears means DON'T disturb unless it's important.
Talking about the chance of rain is not f*ing important. Especially when it's the 10th effin time I'm interrupted by nonsense officetalk in one hour!6 -
I have a huge problem.
I fell in love with a girl and I can't concentrate enough to code. I sit at my PC, open editor and start, but from time to time I find myself staring blindly into a screen realizing i lost some time thinking of her. Then I get back to work, but I start to write nonsense out of confusion. Today ive been trying to code from 10 am til 4 pm, but nothing. Ive literally done nothing today. Just lost time...25 -
Prof offers a VR project to us:
Prof: Lets do something nice using VR
Us: Sounds interesting. Will we get VR glasses to test at home?
Prof: No.
Us: Can we use the VRs of the university?
Prof: There are no available.
Us: Will there be additional ones?
Prof: No.
WHY DO YOU OFFER A VR PROJECT BUT THERE IS AND WILL BE NO HARDWARE??? SORRY, BUT MY OWN GLASSES HAVE NO VR FUNCTION!!6 -
Not a dev job but one I quit.
The company had Windows 98 on all their computers and we had to use it for our daily activities. Being relatively young, I'd only used Windows 98 for a couple of years between the age of 5 and 8 and mostly for playing games.
The company was paying me overtime to stay late and familiarise with the OS.
Basically, they were willing to spend money to train employees to use an obsolete OS - what a bunch of idiots and poor decision-makers.
I left after three months because I could no longer cope with their nonsense.1 -
My son loves...loves Star Wars, so when Star Wars Battlefront (on the PC) went on sale, he jumped on it.
To my shock (I'm not a big gamer), the game is filled with hackers/cheaters that are able to give themselves 'god' mode, so they can kill in one shot and take no damage.
My son (and others in the game) keeps 'reporting' them, but it looks like an issue EA is ignoring.
My son keeps asking me "You're a programmer, can't you fix the game so they can't do that?"
Good lord...I could care less about russians "hacking" our election (moronic press, doesn't even know what that means), but hacking my son's favorite game!...hmm..wonder how long it would take me to drive to EA headquarters and find that SOB dev manager in charge?
I get it, cheaters are gonna cheat, but fix your friggin' code! Aren't you embarrassed!?
Don't give me any of that "we don't know how they are doing it..." nonsense. This is devrant, not <insert media outlet you hate>.13 -
Customer.... I keep getting this error code
Me.... Deletes message box
Customer.... Wow you fixed that quick
Me.... That's why you pay us. -
Goddamit Apple fanboys... I saw 5 tents infront of the Apple Store in Zürich switzerland today, I MEAN WTF ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR LIFE? SPENDING AT LEAST 1000 CHF (around the Same in USD) FOR A FUCKING PHONE WHICH IS FROM APPLE!? WTF?! WHY? WHAT IS THE FUCKING POINT OF ALL THIS NONSENSE?! EXPLAIN THIS BULLFUCK TO ME!!13
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Everyone’s a remote worker at our company by default. Literally no HQ or central physical office to report to. As it should be for most people who are knowledge workers or coders. Why commute and pollute and all that nonsense? It doesn’t make sense anymore for a lot of people like us.14
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I want to vomit everytime rich people in upper management says stupid shit like "working for money in this company is a sin. Work for higher reason"
Hello, if only I get paid as much as you earn just by talking random nonsense in every meeting, I would be glad sharing the same shit quote like that to other employees in the company.18 -
--- Github unveils another round of pricing changes ---
In a move that slipped under the radar with some surprising ease, Microsoft-owned repo wrangler Github unveiled yesterday (7th January) a new set of changes to their pricing model. Unlike the last round of changes that saw unlimited private repos gracing anybody with $7 in their pocket each month - The new round sees everyone on the platform receiving unlimited private repos in a move that's been met with some serious scepticism from the community.
The company's surprisingly brief PR emission (via their official blog) states that they've made 2 major changes, "Github Free now includes unlimited private repositories" - the catch being that you're limited to adding 3 collaborators, which appears to be a move aimed squarely at businesses attempting to operate without forking over the cash for an organisation.
In addition to this there's many vague statements about the kinds of scenarios that "are now possible" via "Github free", the kind of vague nonsense that makes trousers considerably tighter in the PR department.
It would appear that anyone who was previously paying the $7 a month is now a "Pro" user, The PR emission states that "Github Pro (formerly Github Developer) and Github team are also available for developers and teams who need professional coding and collaboration features".
It doesn't seem like you're being offered a whole lot for your $7 a month anymore - a move that would be considered by almost any other company in tech as a good thing, but given that it's Microsoft has been met with warranted suspicion and concern.
Or we could just be being a set of Donny Downers about it, who knows shrug9 -
After two extensive talks with a potential employer (they lasted for hours), I decided to accept the offer, although the salary was ~25% lower than at my previous job. Everything else sounded fantastic and I needed that desperately since at the previous company everything was toxic for years.
These new guys wanted a senior php dev because they had none of them, except only wordpress and drupal people who were not skilled enough to take other types of projects (they called them "custom php"). I liked it and thought I'm gonna shine there and quickly earn a raise because the agency will start earning more by getting projects that they were unable to even bid for.
First day at work and I got assigned to a new Drupal project, although it was supposed to be a simple restful API for a simple iOS app. It could be done in a week or less, with no rushing at all. But it had to be Drupal. And I happened to be around to hear that there is a queue of Drupal projects waiting. After 2 days leaving the office late and having my brain melted by nonsense I was looking at, I quit the job.
No offense to Drupal people, I really do admire you, but I just could not stand it after 8 years "doing custom php". It felt too much like being downgraded. But more than that I was pissed off by the fact that I have been shamelessly lied to and tricked to accept something I clearly said that I dont want.
This happened a year ago. I now earn 2.5x more money than those guys offered and work in a very healthy environment. In the meantime, I heard that the other guys shut their company down.2 -
I hate people who think that building software is all about one click away and generating things. I got told to complete the task faster than the speed of light.
Fancy me some rant time? Let's name that cunt, "Bob".
"
Hey Bob, I got questions for you. Are you sure you were in your mum's womb for 8-9 months? Are you the kind of twat who honk at people as soon as the traffic light's turning green?
Building software takes time, the CI/CD takes time, TestFlight takes time, approvals from the Google Play store take time, approvals from Apple App Store connect take time, Unit testing takes time and every fucking thing you can name takes time!
It's just like sex, nobody wants to be with someone who can only last in bed for 0.000000000001 nanoseconds, the longer, the better, (but not too long).
It is also like building houses, which takes months to build not hours. As from my experience so far, something tells me that you are not the kind of person who would understand how to build a house but a sand castle which takes only hours to build.
Relentlessly, you bombarded me with a pile of bollocks and a pile of nonsense is not going to fasten up the compilation of the software.
"4 -
Elixir:
solution = problem |> process |> process_more |> finalize |> format
Java:
New class() implements quantum mechanics; get(); set(); get(); set(); super.fuckshitup(); throw new nonsense 300 line error and crash6 -
First of all, I hate crammers so much. These people kill the industry without even understanding it. They turned interviews into exams, missed the point of hiring, and saw no distinction between knowledge and information all the time. They don't understand that if you can google an answer in five seconds, it's not knowledge. It's information.
They don't understand that questions like 'what will Python do if you delete an item from a dict while iterating over it' are complete nonsense. They don't understand that it's not 'dig deep'; it's just a bad practice that leads to errors, thus must be avoided. The fact of remembering 'RuntimeError: dictionary changed size during iteration' means that you haven't been avoiding it enough.
One more example. Which signature is correct?
- ApplicationListener<ContextRefreshedEvent>
- ApplicationListener<ContextRefreshEvent>
- ApplicationListener<RefreshedEvent>
- ApplicationListener<RefreshEvent>
Second. What's the point of forcing you to write compilable code in google docs? Do they really expect that one could possibly remember 'import org.springframework.beans.factory.annotation.Autowired;'? Seriously?
Third. Why do they expect me to know Spark, Java, J2EE, Spring Boot, Python, Kafka, Postgres, React/Redux, TypeScript, and work for miserable 70K EUR?
What's wrong with the European IT job market? Are they fucking nuts?9 -
Debugging at school: intently stares at screen and mutters menacingly under breath. Classmates think I'm super intense and avoided me.
Debugging at home: yells nonsense at computer about how I'm right and it's wrong until brain kicks in and tells me why computer is right and I'm an idiot. Neighbours think I'm a crazy psycho :P2 -
My dad got a new phone over the weekend and asked me to help him set it up (TL;DR his IPhone broke, he likely cussed out someone on the phone and now he's on android).
Setting up his bank app, I asked for his password (I somehow knew asking a 80+ year old man password questions wouldn't end well)
<pulls a card out of his wallet>
Dad: "Here you go."
Me: "This is your business card?"
Dad: "Yep. Password is at the bottom. That way I never forget it."
Me: "Jeez dad, you shouldn't have your bank's password on a business card. You don't give these out to people, do you?"
Dad: "Sometimes. Hell, they won't know what that is. Its just a bunch of nonsense."
Luckily the password didn't work. He had to reset it when his IPhone messed up and didn't remember what he changed the password to.6 -
You guys made my whole day for the first time since I joined. (yes all of you!)
1) I had a 'fight' with a guy I'm making a startup with. Had to explain some of the story of my life, just to clarify that I'm not evil or generally unwilling to understand - regarding me, having the need to keep using practices
2) I've found that a whole niche-community of people seems to ignore the rest of the community and won't tag along. Having spent several months to be able to help, and receiving shit or absolutely nothing, for finally trying
3) Was in a bad mood the moment I woke up, because I fought with my girlfriend last night because she fails to communicate simple things and won't realise it.
Sorry for the bad punctuation, I tried and smartphones aren't a nice way to edit such things.
So my rant is basically a thank you! Not a rant.. But still, I think you people are the best for being so relatable and making me laugh, and feel like there's more of 'my kind'.
I also just fixed a bug in my app by (finally!) asking the framework maintainer what's up, and got a response which made no sense in a logical manner.. That's a rant for another day, I'll aggregate all the 0 fucks given, when I'm finally able to leave this thing behind, and give you a proper curse-filled shit stack of the nonsense I'm experiencing!
The bug would still live if I weren't so energized by devRant
EDIT: '!' != ','1 -
year 1: hoping and praying no-one asks you to do anything on the big scary command line
year 5: if I have to leave the safe haven of my terminal to use some GUI nonsense, someone's gonna pay10 -
WHY DON'T YOU FUCKING READ THE CHANGES IN YOUR FUCKING PULL REQUEST???
If you did, you would realize that 50% of the stuff is total fucking nonsense. I don't want to see that you changed "var a = 0" to "var a= 0" just because you can't type with your shitty fingers.
Also, if you did read the changes in your PR, you would have realized that you added a bunch of totally unrelated changes in totally unrelated files.
Fuck! Am I the only one who always tries to produce a clean changeset?? Damn5 -
Don't you just love it when you're pitching new project ideas and there's always that one negative person that has to find something to complain about?
They literally said to me "But what if the user runs out of battery? that will make the application useless for them"
At this point it just feels like this person is turning down every idea for the sake of turning them down.9 -
Today I learned that there is a person who exists, called Logan Paul, who doesn't do anything, but is enormously famous, presumably, for being famous. None of the hundreds of people I follow on twitter follow him, which I find reassuring.7
-
I can understand (to a point) when non-devs use meaningless tech "buzzwords", but please, as developers, can we just agree not to spout nonsense?!
"Electron is so amazing, it's such a lightweight framework!"
"Django is incredible, it's so agile!"
Agile is a family of development methodologies, and Electron is about as heavyweight as a desktop application can possibly get...10 -
The new guy:
- I'm a big fan of effectiveness and efficiency. The faster can you do the task - the better.
- naah, typing in the terminal is soo inefficient. Typing, remembering commands, parameters, paths... That's such a drag! Such a lag! Having a button I could click to do the job is far better!
- OSS is the root of all the evil!
- I'd like to try linux once again. I like it, hopefully I won't need to spend another couple of weeks setting up dual-gpu power management and searches for an Intel wifi's dual-antennae driver.
- I need a bluetooth mouse for my laptop. Using trackpoint or a touchpad is a nonsense [I agree abt the trackpoint]. Using a keyboard/typing for navigation?!? That's utter nonsense!
- I'd like to try i3wm, it looks effective and efficient
it's happened within the last month and I'm still trying to compile all this input into his preferences. So far I'm getting too many conflicting errors13 -
OK heavy rant on 'modern' software development coming! --> don't take it to seriously though :-)
Electron... why does that shit exist? It is like stacking all the worst technologies available to mankind into an enormous pile of crap and polishing that turd to look like something wonderful. It is big, slow and overall AWFUL!
An example? ... Microsoft Teams :-( it burns your PC like fire and makes it squeal for mercy.
When a library/framework becomes the ultimate evolution of abstraction layer upon abstraction layer and it simply should stop to exist and a reset button needs to be pressed.
I would love to see some research on the real world environmental impact that all those shitty slow and bloated web technologies have.
Solution:
Software energy label!
C, C++ and Rust e.t.c. and all accompanying efficient UI libraries should be the only languages/implementations allowed to get a A, B and C label.
Python (without C libraries like Numpy), JavaScript and all those other slow interpreted scripting/Web API nonsense should get a D, E or F label by default.
Have fun!12 -
Splash pages. Remember that crap from 20 years ago? That was a home page with some "click to enter" nonsense to get to the actual home page. Laughably stupid.
Today's empty home pages where you have to scroll down to get to any real content is exactly the same moronic pattern, just by another name: showing off useless design wankery and forcing user interaction to bypass it. Fuck you if you still do that shit.29 -
The first time I caused a massive error on production.
The good news was the site didn't go completely down. The bad news, however, was that it went down for 60% of our users, and because it's only partial, it got detected only after about two hours.
Everyone halted what they were doing to help investigate the issue. When it turned out that my latest commit caused the error, I was told to fix it... with the CTO and senior software architects watching.
It all happened because I deleted one too many line, an if statement, making the accompanying else statement a complete nonsense. It was a corner case code unforeseen by the QA guy.
The attached meme perfectly describes my feeling for the rest of the month following that accident.
2 -
Was trying out React Native and creating a Hello World, I checked the file size and it was about 465mb, and I just thought it was nonsense, then I checked the size of the node module and it was 465mb...smh
god damn node modules man!7 -
There's so many Javascript frameworks, that the only way to stand out is to create your own framework.
I don't see an end or point to this perpetual nonsense.
22 -
Yeah boss, lets study Scrum extensively so you can:
- Create variable length sprints
- User stories that are meaningless like 'fixes'
- Tasks that should be User Stories
- Duplicated tasks/stories that are on the fucking backlog already
- Cross sprints on projects
- No meetings at fucking all to determine who will do what
- Assign people on vacation to current sprints
The list goes on...
An when I point things like that out lets just look at the guy who spent 6 months studying this shit, taught you ( at least tried... ) as if he is saying nonsense while our projects get delayed and our code spaghettifies because we are always in a hurry for lack of time to plan anything :)2 -
Seriously does this master/slave bullshit actually affect everyone here?
From what I’ve seen it’s just a fucking idea / suggestion not a full blown change set being implemented.
Stop fucking over reacting to bubble wrap nonsense, if you want to call it a master/slave relationship then call it a fucking master/slave relationship and be done with it, if this really offends you or you believe political correctness is needed here, go call it something else, at the end of the day it’s still going to be the same thing, just called something else.9 -
That's it, I'm done. My sincere condolences go to the poor soul that will have to maintain this complete and utter crap of code, as I have been doing the past 2 weeks.
3-4 big 4K+ lines files of completely unindented, practically undocumented, interspersed HTML, PHP, JavaScript and CSS! All in the same file.
All the function and variable names are complete nonsense. You might as well have smashed your head against the keyboard and let whatever came out be the names.
You took all the naming conventions that you could find and unleashed your seriously damaged imagination. lowerCamelCase, UpperCamelCase, snakecase, everything in the same fucking function name.
I really needed the money from this project. But I'm done. My mental sanity is more important that try to figure out how to make a decent and usable webpage of THIS COMPLETE DISASTER.
You, the one before me. If you wanted to make sure that no one else besides you could work with this crap, then congrats, YOU FUCKING DID IT WITH HONORS. FUCKING SUMMA CUM LAUDE. PhD and all.4 -
Everyday I fell my soul being sucked by this job.
We have too much liberty and it's all scattered, every fucking project uses a different framework.
Everything is a mess, no one seems to care and I'm feeling like shit for being the only one that seems to care.
Every time I start job hunting I fell depressed because of this nonsense bullshit they call job requirements.
Just wanna run away from this mess and never look back.13 -
Last week our department drama queen was showing off Visual Studio’s ability to create a visual code map.
He focused on one “ball of mud”, vilifying the number of references, naming, etc and bragging he’s been cleaning up the code. Typical “Oooohhh…this code is such a mess…good thing I’m fixing it all..” nonsense. Drama queen forgot I wrote that ‘ball of mud’
Me: “So, what exactly are you changing?”
DK: “Everything. It’s a mess”
Me: “OK, are any of the references changing? What exactly is the improvement?”
DK: “There are methods that accept Lists. They should take IEnumerables.”
Me: “How is that an improvement?”
<in a somewhat condescending tone>
DK: “Uh…testability. Took me almost two weeks to make all the changes. It was a lot of work, but now the code is at least readable now.”
Me: “Did you write any tests?”
DK: “Um…no…I have no idea what uses these projects.”
Me: “Yes you do, you showed me map.”
DK: “Yes, but I don’t know how they are being used. All the map shows are the dependencies.”
Me: “Do you know where the changes are being deployed?”
DK: “I suppose the support team knows. Not really our problem.”
Me: “You’re kinda right. It’s not anyone’s problem.”
DK: “Wha…huh…what do you mean?”
Me: “That code has been depreciated ever since the business process changed over 4 years ago.”
DK: “Nooo…are you sure? The references were everywhere.”
Me: “Not according to your map. Looks like just one solution. It can be deleted, let me do that real quick”
<I delete the solution+code from source control>
Me: “Man, sorry you wasted all that time.”
I could tell he was kinda’ pissed and I wasn’t really sorry. :)2 -
This might actually be my first real rant.
Whatever fucking cockgoblin decided that making dynamics GP so fucking confusing needs to suck a big bag of dicks. I'm so fucking tired of having to google every damned table name and column name because nothing makes any motherfucking sense.
Am I supposed to instinctively know what PM20201 does? What data it holds? I don't mind reading documentation. But it's hard to even know where to start when the shitbird API and database are more complicated than calculating orbital fucking decay.
I am done. Fuck you gp. Fuck you and your nonsense. I guess our sales people don't get to know when an invoice was paid.8 -
Am I the only one who can't take the IT nonsense in TV SERIES (especially crime series) anymore? ANY UI shown on an arbitrary screen looks like garbage! And in addition to the f*cked up screen designs, every damn action of course makes weird beep noises, which would be totally annoying after like 3 secs IRL. How the heck are we supposed to take such BS seriously? This totally destroys so many TV series for me!
(Also, I have to explain to my wife why I'm laughing all the time! :p)10 -
One of our senior dev enjoys berating the other devs because they don't check-in code according to his schedule (once a day, once an hour..he flip-flops a lot), then when they do, he 'reviews' their code, beating them up because of incomplete features, commented out code..petty..petty nonsense.
Ex. (this occurred couple of weeks ago).
Ralph: "The button click code in this event isn't complete"
Dev: "No, its not, the code in my development branch. You said it was best practice to check in code daily whether the code worked or not. I didn't finish the event last night and ..."
Ralph: "Exactly. Before you check any code into source control, it has to work and be 100% complete. What if someone moved that code into production? What happens if that code got deployed? I'm not even going talk about the lack of unit tests."
Dev: "Uh..well..the code is on the development channel, and I branched the project in my folder ...I didn't think it mattered.."
Ralph: "Ha ha...you see what happens when you don't think...listen..."
- blah blah blah for 10 minutes of hyperbole nonsense of source control check-in 'best practice'
This morning Ralph's computer's hard-drive crashed.
Ralph: "F-k! ..F-k! ... my f-king computer hard drive crashed!"
Me: "Ouch...did you loose anything important?"
Ralph: "A f-king week of code changes."
Me: "You checked everything into source control on Friday ...didn't you?"
Ralph: "F-k no!...I got busy...and...f-k!"
Me: "Look at the bright side, you'll have a good story to tell about the importance of daily check-ins"
Oh...if looks could kill. Karma...you're the best. -
Iphone autocorrect is truly revolutionary. I truly need these super common words to constantly be changed to complete nonsense.
"in" to "inn"
"an" to "available"
"do" to "doo" or "dou"
"and" to "abs", "ABCs"
Many, many others.
It took over 20 corrections to complete this simple thought.
Soft locks several times a week so I have to hard restart it in the middle of doing things.
$3500 for a VR headset? Where do I sign up?9 -
I'm getting so fucking sick of non-technical business people talking bullshit, nonsense, technobabble on LinkedIn, buzzword buzzword buzzword. Their mouths work so much fucking faster than their pathetic little brains, they should be put up for case study.3
-
We have to use this tool in work for classifying new and existing projects for GDPR. Long story short you have to fill out a REALLY long questionnaire, then it gets reviewed by someone in legal. The tool will also assign you tasks and suggest actions to common issues (e.g. suggesting a banner to explain cookie policy if you tick a certain box).
I have spent about an hour trying to re-assign the assessment I started, as i'm due to leave the company in a few days, to the guy taking over from me.
1. There is a “generate shareable URL” button, with the ability to click a button that says “replace me with the logged in user who opens this”. All it does is duplicate the name and description fields and send a new copy to that person, with no access to any of my other content or answers.
2. I did find a re-assign button eventually, again all it does it create a duplicate, and throws and error saying names must be unique when I try to save it.
3. While I couldn’t find a way to do that, I did find another button to at least assign the reviewer. It told me i’m forbidden to change the reviewer on assessments i’ve created.
This is THE WORST piece of nonsensical shit on earth. The entire application is absolute garbage and sssssssooooooo slow.
When you first create an assessment it brings you to a page that has all the questions, makes sense right? Wrong. All the questions are in read-only mode, and they are simply there as a "this is what you can expect to see later on", telling you whether or not they will be freeform, multiple choice etc.
The way to actually answer the questions is to click the "start survey" button hidden in the "status" dropdown.
I don't have much advice to anyone around GDPR, but please stay the hell away from TrustArc. -
Coding-related ads are always entertaining. They nearly always contain easily spotted nonsense and error-filled code. Not even sure where to start with this one...
9 -
I am using VS Codium instead of VS Code to see what kind of things change when you scrape the Microsoft out of it. Apparently some tools for dotnet core like debugging are locked down and only allowed to run in Microsoft made IDEs.
I hate the sneaky Microsoft API lockdown nonsense and will be steering future projects away from any dotnet core development. I thought this was dead in VS Code but they managed to sneak it in.
7 -
Had a longer talk with a friend today.
Acquaintances of theirs were at a restaurant (!) a few days ago, complaining about how much they paid for breakfast buffet. Their rant went on how the restaurant didn't even include coffee in the breakfast buffet.
I know this restaurant. I really like it there. They roast their own coffee in the back. They have a transparent bakery with spelt flour, from certified organic farming. They support the regional farmers, even the meat for the cold cuts etc comes from a local butcher, livestock is from regional free range farming.
If you wanna know what's wrong with customers, that's the prime example.
Not only didn't they bother at all to look at the menu... They ignored at all what they paid for. Just stuffed themselves without any thought at all.
Then they wondered why the price was so high.
Of course, high price = bad, so they rant everywhere what a bad restaurant they visited.
It just made me so fucking angry, cause that's the same shit I have to deal every day with. Not giving a damn, not reading any information at all - but spouting nonsense and foul mouthing everything is okay.
Fuck those kinds of humans.1 -
(Disclaimer: This rant is satire and only here to feed an algorithm by @PrivateGER)
This FUCKING fuck company where I had my fucking shit internship - just fucking asked me to freaking work for another project and fucking baiting me with a shitty damn payment for my little shit project I had (and still fucking work on today) while I had this damn internship. This idiot wants me to fucking waste my free time besides FUCKING SCHOOL (doing my absolute nonsense uselessfuck Abitur) and my lovely PASSIONATE GAME PROJECT with shit damn HTML-ing and CSS-ing and good damn JS-ing - for a SHITHEAD-200€ JOB. This bastard wants me to register my ass as a "Kleingewerbe" (dunno english therm but it's a small similar for to being freelancer) probably to enslave me or USE me as a cheapass worker. I'll call this dude today and politely tell him to FUCK OFF!!
(Nothing against the company, they're freaking cool! The dude too)4 -
HATE “APPLICATIONS” THAT CHANGE BROWSER SETTINGS.
If you’re a “developer” who has ever created such annoying nonsense - come show me who you are, I want to punch you in the face.
There is a special place in hell for malware coders...3 -
So I've kicked off the motorcycle season for this year! Scanned some nice roads for speed control traps or road dirt, then the same route with more WABROOOOOO.
That machine is whopping 19 years old, and I still like it as much as on the first day when I bought it as new. Plus that it doesn't have software nonsense, not even injection. Means, it fucking works.
8 -
Working with a client on his "superior idea" and suddenly this happens: (longer rant)
tl;dr;
Client wanted me to move a div by 3 millimetres to the left and blamed me for not being capable of doing so while giving him a nonsense about different resolutions and screen sizes. (Use a ruler, DUH)
Me: Here's the updated design layout as our designer specified.
Him: Looks good but it needs to be moved 3 millimetres to the left
Me: *Confused as hell* - Wait, did you just said 3 millimetres?
Him: Yes, is that a problem for you?
Me: *Amazed* Well, yes, you see, we don't measure in millimetres. We use pixels.
Him: Ahh, can't you do anything right!? Why do I have to deal with your nonsense of telling me that this is not impossible? Just take your god damn ruler and put it on your screen, then move it 3 millimetres to the left.
Me: You do realise that every person has a different size/resolution monitor so it won't work?
Him: I don't care. Just do your god damn job or i'll find someone else to do it.
*
Story continued in such manner - we spent an hour on skype moving the stupid <div> around until it hit his 3 millimetres mark.
*
His: See, you could do it.
Me: *Sends him screenshot of my own screen (his was 1024x768, mine 1920x1080) where page is broken and not aligned*
Him: Oh come on, you break every god damn thing. You are the worst. I'm going to find a better one. *hangs skype call*
Him: *3 days later* Hi, so, umm, I've talked to other developers and they said it's impossible to measure in millimetres. Can you revert those changes we did?
After all this I've fully realised that this person is sits at computer very rarely and does not how it even works...5 -
So Linus Torvalds is stepping away from his creation to get himself reprogrammed to be better accommodating over leftist nonsense. I'm also reading that retarded manifesto right now (https://postmeritocracy.org), and holy shit, one of the signatories is Linus Torvalds daughter. The fuck is wrong with you white people? Are we seriously halting back scientific/technological progress for these loons? Holy shit.
What fucking ever, at least I'm not white. Worse comes to worst, I'll just go back home, take back what I've learned here, and hopefully avoid the mistakes Western society is killing themselves over these days.13 -
Okay, first rant here.
Spend most of my morning searching for a js file that was supposed to build some graphs in a report page in this legacy system (still in active development) just to find it embedded inside a random .php file being included inside a wall of if-elses (that shit has around 100 lines) on the index.php (that somehow manages to route all the nonsense that's going on there).. was it really that difficult to make it a proper .js file? and actually import it on the page that is using it? c'mon...
4 -
This is a followup to my earlier RealTek networking rant.
After reviewing and researching all of the wlan adapter suggestions on that rant, as well as a few more, I settled on an Alfa AWUS036ACH usb3 wireless-ac adapter. Every Alfa I've ever owned has been amazing, so I happily bought it.
It arrived today, and I excitedly threw my existing RealTek garbage across the room, hooked up my fancy new toy, and... nothing.
Fearing it was doa, I ran `lsusb` to see if it was even showing up... and it was! but identifying itself as a RealTek device...?
All of my research showed it uses the Atheros9k chipset. It's advertised and praised as using the "famous Atheros AR9271 chipset" and the Ath9k drivers. Except this particular unit appears to use the RTL8821AU chipset, therefore requiring RealTek drivers. askfja;sldf.
I unhappily fetched the garbage from the dirty laundry where it landed, installed it, and began my research anew.
I found, among all of the wonderful promises of Ath9k bliss, a thread on the Kali forums corroborating the RealTek driver nonsense, and it explained how to get the RTL8821 drivers working with it. which is pretty much the very last thing I want to do.
If you've read any of my networking rants, well, they've all been about how totally awful RealTek linux drivers are, and that's pretty much common knowledge anyway. So I'm like extremely pissed off.
ARGH WHY IS NETWORKING WITH LINUX ALWAYS SO FREAKING DIFFICULT? haslkfjasgdskg6 -
You've got to be a masochist to be a javascript/typescript developer.
Each time I come back to the npm-related parts of my project, the application won't start because of some dependencies nonsense. And I know for sure I left the project working perfectly last time.
Every time... every fucking time! Just leave the project unattended for a week and be sure you'll find it dead next time.
I mean I as a developer don't really have to do ANYTHING for my code to break.
How can people love javascript is a mystery to me.15 -
CEO: “Everyone has to come back to the office. No more COVID working from home nonsense. We need to work together in person to be truly effective.”
Everyone: “There aren’t enough offices and desks for everyone.”
CEO: “Oh, also, we’re laying off thousands.”
Everyone: “Well, ok, but there’s still not enough room for everyone to work together in the same spaces.”
CEO: “Ok, contractors can work from home to make room for the remaining full-time employees.”
Me, a contractor:
3 -
I don't know if I'm being pranked or not, but I work with my boss and he has the strangest way of doing things.
- Only use PHP
- Keep error_reporting off (for development), Site cannot function if they are on.
- 20,000 lines of functions in a single file, 50% of which was unused, mostly repeated code that could have been reduced massively.
- Zero Code Comments
- Inconsistent variable names, function names, file names -- I was literally project searching for months to find things.
- There is nothing close to a normalized SQL Database, column ID names can't even stay consistent.
- Every query is done with a mysqli wrapper to use legacy mysql functions.
- Most used function is to escape stirngs
- Type-hinting is too strict for the code.
- Most files packed with Inline CSS, JavaScript and PHP - we don't want to use an external file otherwise we'd have to open two of them.
- Do not use a package manger composer because he doesn't have it installed.. Though I told him it's easy on any platform and I'll explain it.
- He downloads a few composer packages he likes and drag/drop them into random folder.
- Uses $_GET to set values and pass them around like a message contianer.
- One file is 6000 lines which is a giant if statement with somewhere close to 7 levels deep of recursion.
- Never removes his old code that bloats things.
- Has functions from a decade ago he would like to save to use some day. Just regular, plain old, PHP functions.
- Always wants to build things from scratch, and re-using a lot of his code that is honestly a weird way of doing almost everything.
- Using CodeIntel, Mess Detectors, Error Detectors is not good or useful.
- Would not deploy to production through any tool I setup, though I was told to. Instead he wrote bash scripts that still make me nervous.
- Often tells me to make something modern/great (reinventing a wheel) and then ends up saying, "I think I'd do it this way... Referes to his code 5 years ago".
- Using isset() breaks things.
- Tens of thousands of undefined variables exist because arrays are creates like $this[][][] = 5;
- Understanding the naming of functions required me to write several documents.
- I had to use #region tags to find places in the code quicker since a router was about 2000 lines of if else statements.
- I used Todo Bookmark extensions in VSCode to mark and flag everything that's a bug.
- Gets upset if I add anything to .gitignore; I tried to tell him it ignores files we don't want, he is though it deleted them for a while.
- He would rather explain every line of code in a mammoth project that follows no human known patterns, includes files that overwrite global scope variables and wants has me do the documentation.
- Open to ideas but when I bring them up such as - This is what most standards suggest, here's a literal example of exactly what you want but easier - He will passively decide against it and end up working on tedious things not very necessary for project release dates.
- On another project I try to write code but he wants to go over every single nook and cranny and stay on the phone the entire day as I watch his screen and Im trying to code.
I would like us all to do well but I do not consider him a programmer but a script-whippersnapper. I find myself trying to to debate the most basic of things (you shouldnt 777 every file), and I need all kinds of evidence before he will do something about it. We need "security" and all kinds of buzz words but I'm scared to death of this code. After several months its a nice place to work but I am convinced I'm being pranked or my boss has very little idea what he's doing. I've worked in a lot of disasters but nothing like this.
We are building an API, I could use something open source to help with anything from validations, routing, ACL but he ends up reinventing the wheel. I have never worked so slow, hindered and baffled at how I am supposed to build anything - nothing is stable, tested, and rarely logical. I suggested many things but he would rather have small talk and reason his way into using things he made.
I could fhave this project 50% done i a Node API i two weeks, pretty fast in a PHP or Python one, but we for reasons I have no idea would rather go slow and literally "build a framework". Two knuckleheads are going to build a PHP REST framework and compete with tested, tried and true open source tools by tens of millions?
I just wanted to rant because this drives me crazy. I have so much stress my neck and shoulder seems like a nerve is pinched. I don't understand what any of this means. I've never met someone who was wrong about so many things but believed they were right. I just don't know what to say so often on call I just say, 'uhh..'. It's like nothing anyone or any authority says matters, I don't know why he asks anything he's going to do things one way, a hard way, only that he can decipher. He's an owner, he's not worried about job security.13 -
A Bad and Sad Day
Hello Monday,
Client : on weekend site went down for 7 hours? Why ?
Me : Let me check the logs
Client : bla bla bla
boss : check ur code bla bla bla
Reason : Some PHP service stopped on server
Client2 : I have purchased this software and you have to made minor changes
Me : Payment Integrations are not working?
Client : Whataa nonsense is this.. you are supposed to do this
Me : We are supposed to do minor changes. They do not have proper payment integrations. If you want we have to write complete code
Client : bla bla.. I gave you working software
:( Why don't you just fuck off .. liars2 -
Designer reporting a UI/Design related bug:
I noticed the wrong colour is being used on screen X. It should be xxxxx. Its imperative that we fix this, as it destroys the entire design motif. Our colour scheme draws influence from the ancient Mayans. They were relentless in their pursuit of excellence, whether it be their temples, their sophisticated writing system, their complex calendars, or their advanced mathematics.They sought immortality through their work, as do we with ours. Users will become lost in our onboarding unless we harmonise the flow, the slightest deviation could be catastrophic. Please fix this as priority 1, to avoid running the balance of the app
Designer reporting a technical bug:
Oh yeah, app crashed last week. Not sure what I was doing, maybe look into that7 -
Today somebody claimed they have the "copyright" of responsive websites.
First of all, I'm here for almost a year now, but this is my first rant. Hello guys!
(linuxxx, call me)
This didn't happen to me.
So, it begins like this:
Some client called us and said "[INSERT_COMPANY_NAME] called us and said they have the copyright of all responsive websites, asking money."
I hanged up, laughed hard and visited [INSERT_COMPANY_NAME] website and saw this:
- Each website that uses the solution must report the domain name in order to register it.
- If a company undertakes web site design, it is the company responsibility to inform and record.
- Any unauthorized website will be considered unauthorized and a violation case will be opened.
...
Pricing (Currency Converted to Dollars)
1 Website ~$260
2 - 10 Website ~$1300
...
Well, eventually I reported this to government. I unmasked this fraud.
OR DID I?
Their site is saying this now: "We do not serve this to anyone except government now, you are making nonsense and we do not want nonsense."
So I posted it on a forum, asking what can we do.
We are suing this company now. Yeah, I said "we".
PS: If we cannot win this, I'll get the copyright of subdomains.1 -
Dumbass made me update site with broken code ...
After git pulling I got an ich and tested it...
So the following talk happened:
Me: feature x is still broken (it was working before...)
Dass: yeah, I just wanna make some screenshots of it from another machine that has windows.
Me: OK, I just rolled the changes back, you can access the other machine at lan...
Me inside: OOOHHHH YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT MADE ME GET UP FROM BED AND START MY FUCKING COMPUTER FOR THIS BULLSHIT IDIOTIC NONSENSE?!? FOR REAL??? GET YOU SHIT TOGETHER ASSHOLE! -
What's with all this micro-certification nonsense that seems to plague the industry? Does anyone actually give a shit that I may have passed some vendor's five day bootcamp?
Apparently I can now have a trophy (virtual, of course) if I complete X online MS courses.
Some of these courses seem to focus on stuff that has no use in day-to-day work.
And I have to actually pay because I learned your product and then pay to maintain the cert in some cases. WTF?!
I can see why the vendors do it---I like free money too---but why have we even let this become a thing.
It's like collecting baseball cards.
I despair of what our industry has become...I really do.11 -
"Let the developers consider a conceptual design,” the King said, for about the twentieth time that day._
“No, no!” said the Queen. “Tests first—design afterwards.”
“Stuff and nonsense!” said Alice loudly. “The idea of writing the tests first!”
“Hold your tongue!” said the Queen, turning purple. “How much code have you written recently, anyway?” she sneered.
“I won’t,” said the plucky little Alice. “Tests shouldn’t drive design, design should drive testing. Tests should verify that your code works as it was designed, and that it meets the customer’s requirements, too,” she added, surprised by her own insight. “And when you drive your tests from a conceptual design, you can test smarter instead of harder.”4 -
The importance of headphones is to avoid listening to co-workers talking nonsense all day long, especially young people.10
-
WTF Windows.
I was assigned as TA to a highschool CS class, and was doing a live demonstration to ~20 students on how to install the Python environment and set up venv (on Windows, since that is what the majority of students use).
After installing Python, I tried to demonstrate invoking the Python environment by typing "python" in the command prompt. However, that opened up Microsoft Store instead.
Being extremely confused, I had to talk nonsense for 2 minutes while frantically look up what happened on another screen.
In the end, it seems like Microsoft recently introduced this "feature" that automatically associates the opening of a program to whatever it feels like.
-.-9 -
How to run a productive meeting?
Have a written agenda (provided before the meeting, of course)
No "Lets talk about the service architecture" nonsense. Provide the exact details of what the outcome of the meeting should be. Even been lucky enough to cancel meetings when the agenda points are answered in a reply email. Its awesome.
As conditioned as we are about agendas, a few mgrs still skip the agenda and it ends up as you would imagine. At the end, everyone is like "Why are we here? What did we decide? Looks like we need another meeting..."4 -
Just a random app recommendation.
If anyone of you haven't tried NewPipe yet, you should. Open source app for YouTube. All Google nonsense was removed and many awesome features were added (as seen below).
You can also play music with your screen turned off :)
20 -
I’m working at an architecture firm these days, so I don’t have many “dev” stories to tell. However, I’d like to share this anecdote to reassure (or demoralize) you all that the kind of nonsense we’ve all dealt with as software developers isn’t limited to the software industry.
I’ve been working on a project to build townhomes and apartments on vacant lots in an urban environment.
Space is limited, so the client assured us early on that they would be centralizing all the mechanical equipment (water heaters, air conditioners, etc.) in the basement of each building. We finally got all the apartments laid out and presented them to the client last week. During that meeting, we get a casual “oh, by the way, we need a 3-foot by 3-foot mechanical closet in each apartment.” Did the project manager push back? Of course not. Have our deadlines been adjusted as a result of changing requirements? Don’t be silly! Starting tomorrow morning, the team gets to feverishly search for an extra 9 square feet in each of a couple dozen different apartment layouts that are already “cozy” in time to meet our next deliverable.
Clients suck.
Changing requirements suck.
Pushover PMs suck.
In every industry.2 -
Client from hell, next chapter.
As money comes in, project won't be canceled.
Only madness comes for free.
Newest insanity.... We had to explain that in a warehouse system a unique article number as an identifier is a must.... This discussion took 20 minutes.
The reason? Saving 2 secs as they don't have to enter the supplier item number....
Their plan?
Article Number can be...
Integer, automatically assigned
String, Supplier Name and Supplier Item Number seperated by a delimiter....
The argument that stopped this insanity... Costs.
We argued that if we are forced to implement something which we believe will be a high costs, no value, nonsense feature we won't do the necessary migration and programming after reversal as in 'find someone else who unbreaks this insanity'...
Did they understand that a warehouse system without article number for reference is dumb? Nope.1 -
Fun issue
Swedish client is unable to enter a currency conversion rate in a field and submit. 'Not a float' well we can clearly see that it is a float when he does it (0.5 for example), not an issue for us though.
Reproducing was a nightmare, eventually it boiled down to the fact that the framework we were using had automatic locale checks. Now because our numeric fields are actually weird text fields (front end nonsense), it was converting the period to be a comma (Swedish people would write 0,5 normally). And if you actually entered 0,5 the range check (0.01-1000) failed because it couldn't parse the comma (no locale check on that one)
Godamn facepalm. Really confused the hell out of us when we saw the error, had to go diving through library code. To top this off, locale checks are supposed to be disabled as of about 2 years ago
In revenge against our oppressor :PHP: on slack is now an alias for the shit emoji5 -
we spent days now cleaning years and years of trash in our db. we freed 100gb of pure nonsense, and we're still going. it feels cathartic. some tables i wanted to drop since i saw them for the first time3
-
We use jira at my company. It's great for me, because no ticketing system's UI is worth a shit, but jira's API is excellent. But we're switching to a new system that is an absolute piece of garbage. Every page is 100% Javascript, so no source can ever be viewed, and the URL never changes to reflect what's onscreen. If you know a ticket number, no URL will ever get you straight to it. You have to navigate multiple slow-loading 25MB piles of Javascript to reach what you're seeking. And most damning of all: the new system has an API, but our highest management is withholding access to it, claiming it breeds laziness.
Is amazing the kind of shit you have to swallow when your management has regular meetings with really really super extremely good-looking sales people.10 -
(On the phone)
Internet Provider Support: "Hello, how can I help you?"
Me: "Hi, I've been unable to connect to internet for the past few hours and-
IPS: "Haven't you heard the pre-recorded message?!"
Me: "Uh... No? I'm sorry, but no message was played before you answered."
ISP: "Well, internet services are experiencing technical issues in your whole area. We'll contact you soon as it's resolved." *Hangs up*
...The company then proceeded to state that everything was fine, after a few hours. On their website. Without specifying how to manually restore the connection at all, since apparently this was needed.
...Great job?
This looks kinda dumb to me but... Is it just me?6 -
TIL the best way to “win” an argument on Twitter is to simply abandon the thread when people think you should answer for your “crime” of having a difference of opinion and they start bringing social justice nonsense into it as a replacement for logic. They’re going on and on about how you are obligated to reply to them to answer for your alleged “privilege” and your silence just makes them sputter with rage.8
-
Okay. I understand that responsive emails are hard. But that's just nonsense... -.-'
Though I think it's my mail client's fault, bit still.
6 -
So anyone else has thoughts about Google and Facebook taking a stand against "fake news" online?
I mean obviously we could all do with a little less nonsense in our feeds, but where do we draw the line until this becomes 'censorship'.7 -
I always wanted to kill my professors, but now I admire them a lot. I learnt to "Fake knowledge" from them. I learnt to talk all the nonsense thing from them. These quality helps a lot after college.
postscript: 20-25% professors were good in my college day.2 -
!rant
How I think the process for designing a hardware-driver is like
CEO: "Alright everyone, we have designed and created this great product, now let's write a driver for it!"
PM: "Great then! We just code for Windows, create an eye-catching UI but leave the actual at the worst possible case that could work!"
Dev: "B-But isn't there other OSes, like Linux and Android that people use on their computers too?"
PM: "Shut up! We are going to JUST support Windows and f*** no absolutely other OSes!
Dev: "But what if they are also developers, and want to control and use this great product by programming it themselves? We should make the driver open-source, or at least give them some APIs!"
PM: "Nonsense! They are only going to use this product on M$ Windows, and with the program we provide to them, even if it's crappy and crashes most of the time!"
Dev: "But-but..."
PM: "No buts! That's our final decision!"
And some other consumer devs are like, "F*** it, we just reverse-engineer the codes and write a new driver ourselves!"
:|3 -
When a company operates like a startup but they're over 10 years old and they try to do the micro brew lunch thing and be "casual" but they pay you like shit and the boss is a moron.2
-
Now that the Phone has a custom rom with root, with only a little issue with some split screen nonsense I'm finally ready to use my phone like a normal ph- OH MY GOD WHAT IS THIS? WHERE THE HELL ARE MY BLOBS? WHAT THE FUUCK!?
Good thing that I rooted with Magisk and I could flash the blobs https://forum.xda-developers.com/ap...
9 -
I'm glad I have a job where we don't have team 'building' nonsense. We just come in and we team-build on the spot, as in, we get along.
Oh, the nightmare of my previous job where they resented employees for not joining some stupid party where they all got drunk and had forced 'fun'. I like authentic environments.5 -
I wonder if it's possible to become a project manager or a scrum master without habitually incorporating the phrases, "circle back," "reinvent the wheel," and "one-stop shop," in your daily vocabulary.2
-
Front-end programmers work on all the snazzy Javascript that you may not be aware you rely on so much when killing time on StumbleUpon.
1 -
Worst thing you've seen another dev do? So many things. Here is another...
A developer purposely forged international shipping documents by 'hard-coding' data to get around international shipping restrictions (ex. we can't sell 'Widgets' to Germany...so under the category he would replace the value with 'light bulb'). He was 'under pressure' to make keep the money rolling in no matter what.
We were eventually 'caught', fined over $300,000 (which was better than the $10,000 per offense and we had thousands of offenses).
For this major frack-up, 'Rob' was promoted to manager of the International department, got to travel (including his wife) to several European countries, and eventually obtained a company-paid MBA degree.
'Rob' liked to joke about how he would sometimes have to pinch himself how lucky he was by working for such stupid people (yes, he used the word 'stupid') and how gullible government investigators were.
"All I had to do was say 'its a bug in Windows' or some other kind of nonsense and they believed me."
'Rob' quit 3 months after receiving his MBA degree (again, 100% company paid) and the international department closed due to some potential illegal activity.2 -
Putting mobile phone to DnD.
Putting on Bluetooth headsets with ANC, blasting some good shit music.
Violently cooking or desperately ordering food at the good restaurants.
While waiting, grinding some coffee beans, making fresh coffee or some nice tea with milk.
Laying on the sofa in a food induced coma, turning on any streaming service with the real bad shitty movies.
Hentai Kamen, The Machine Girl, ...
Anything thats either pure groteske bullshit or that doesn't require more than a braincell cause it appeals either to the violent or complete nonsense side of my brain.
Last but not least, a few cold beers.
ANC headset stays on, just switching from music to tv - shutting out all the outside noise.1 -
idk when I became so jaded, but I don't have the patience to deal with a specific kind of people. the kind that are spoiled, are too "nice", in that very corporate way, speak in that nonsense business language, and they all look the same (white, well dressed, plain). the kind of people that consider making slides real work 🙄
sigh... maybe it's a prejudice of mine, but ffs... those people are fake af, and i have zero tolerance for work politics6 -
"And in a stunning turn of events, he got it to work!"
But seriously... I've literally been throwing shit at a wall and seeing what would stick.
Fucking DTOs and getting shit out of a database. I need better resources on how to do this properly!
Anyways, I found that just using 'object' and letting the compiler deal with the rest of the bullshit actually allowed my code to work and run. I'm still a little in shock.
I'm over here trying to keep things in a nice one-to-one because that's what my PM recommended... and instead I just get slammed by Type casting nonsense and more errors than I can begin to understand. And unfortunately, Stackoverflow is of no help because everyone's issues are very nuanced and unrelated to my problem... Maybe I'm the problem? 🤷
But here it is working without all that bullshit. I don't know man... This code base is not the rager I was expecting. I'm getting my ass kicked with code that doesn't fall in line with the book I'm learning from.
You know how they say, "forget everything you've read and learned"? I'm feeling that really hard right now.
Constantly fighting the urge to rip everything down and do it based on what my book is recommending, but then the logical natured side of me is like "you ain't got that kind of time to be unfucking someone's work, only to get caught in more trouble. Your ego is not worth it"
Anyways, it's fucking late here and I'm glad enough to not have to think about this issue anymore. Bye.3 -
This week I’ve been reinstating IE11 support.
OMFG WHY!? I hear you ask.
Is it due to critical legacy integration dependencies? AD Intranet logins? Draconian Group Policy rules?
Nope. This ONE user just prefers it! 🤯
How much are we getting paid for this nonsense? Sweet FA!
#cognativedissonance 😢3 -
I just saw Kickstarter's blog post about moving over to the Blockchain. They're doing it because, uh, protocols, or something. No joke, here's a direct quote from their post:
"You may have heard of HTTP (Hypertext Transfer Protocol) which helps you browse the web, or SMTP (Simple Mail Transfer Protocol) which helps you send email. Protocols like these make up the unseen infrastructure of the internet. Imagine that, but for crowdfunding creative projects."
What the fuck does that even mean? The rest of the blog post is more of the same. They packed it full of every crypto buzzword they could find while also not actually providing any useful information.
Full article here, if anyone wants to read a headache-inducing pile of nonsense: https://kickstarter.com/articles/...9 -
Step 1: It is at least 1am, I am reasonably tired.
Step 2: I figure I need to be productive at some point.
Step 3: Browse random websites until the end of time (probably 20m of nonsense)
Step 4: Suddenly I'm super motivated to actually get something done, slapping some music on and starting to work until I fall straight into bed.
Good days.
Seriously, the thing that motivates me the most is probably music.1 -
While it's totally not without its valid use cases, I fucking hate pair programming.
Well, let me elaborate. I hate *remote* pair programming. It completely disrupts my flow and wastes so much time with additional water cooler nonsense, and pedantic argument for the sake of participation. Not to mention "oh hey let me see how you did this... Oh, you know what, I think it would be better to do it this way...". Ok, great, we weren't even discussing that, but sure, let's completely detail this session to refactor something that could have come up at a good transition point, like I dunno, say a code review?
Like I said, there are very good reasons to pair program, but I would much prefer rubber ducking wherever possible.2 -
Fuck you, previous lead architect dictator! I spent a year arguing against your rigid nonsense custom built bullshit, and a year and a half after the client finally caught on and got rid of you I just got bitten yet again from one of your retarded over-complicated "solutions" to problems that never existed in the first place.
I wish I could send you an email and tell you about how I have thrown out all the useless shit you created and that we are all clearly better off now, but instead I will just share my frustration on DevRant and hope you read it and know exactly who you are.
I feel sorry for your current client.1 -
A friend of mine asked me yesterday for help for his bachelor thesis.
He wants to write about MySQL internals in regards to BLOB storage / usage.
We had a veeeerrrry long discussion....
And found a loooot of scary internet pages.
It's so .... Insane....
What some people with doctor titles or higher education generate...
Isn't content. More poo...
Most "blogs" / "articles" or whatever the author named it were missing all kinds of relevant data (version, configuration, anything relevant) but full of opinionated / biased bullshit.
Highlights were:
- we store lot of BLOB data, Backups take long and require more space
(you store additional data in an database, whaddya expect???!!!!)
- interesting guesswork about locking without any reference (interesting since it was sometimes so far away from reality that it looked more like quantum physics)
- storing blobs means that _each_ blob entry will be stored in a separate file (without any reference, but if an RDBMs did that... It would end in an amazing fireball I guess)
- BLOB's bad since it can represent only the file content, the database cannot distinguish wether it's an MP3 / MPG or anything like that...
(Ehm. Yeah. And an database cannot distinguish if you store under "Name" an Name or gibberish?!)
I somehow think that some people made an doctor and post this gibberish nonsense so people stay dumb to give them a job...
Like the TV repair men who steals the batteries from the remote.
Even conspiracy theories were more convincing -
Great googly moogly is Kotlin an ugly language.
If you are just starting out with Android or Java development in general, I highly recommend sticking with Java and avoid Kotlin like the plague. It feels like a meme language that was taken a little too seriously.
Full of little flowery nonsense that aims to make the language more human, but only serves to make it look like a child designed it.
I absolutely hate when a language doesn't require type declarations.
The "it" keyword rankles my underwear beyond belief.
Trying to build a dictionary/hashmap/hash felt like I was writing out an essay for school. In other languages it's straightforward and makes sense. Even PHP makes more sense.
I am obviously missing something here, because there is no way something so common and done the same way across different languages has such a wildly different approach in Kotlin.
I have as much experience with Java as I do Kotlin but it immediately makes more sense as a language and doesn't have all this flowery nonsense. It is verbose, which means I don't have to decipher what the code is actually doing when I read it.
I'm familiar with the enterprise Java meme, but I'm not writing enterprise Java, and that's not my style anyway so it doesn't affect me. But even so, that would be a million times easier to handle that Kotlin.14 -
When your director wants a single flat static webpage(a simple advertisement with a form), but forces you to create it within Wordpress
....talk about clunky9 -
Can anyone suggest any good computer science/IT/development/coding/computery based podcasts to listen to?
I'm getting awfully bored of listening to idiots jabber away about nonsense each night.4 -
Back in grammar school we started programming in TI-Basic on a TI89 Titanium as it was part of math class (calculus and geometry). I didn't really understand much because the teacher thought it was a great idea to start with recursively calculating GCD (and we were in a sort of "linguist profile", nobody had ever touched a line of code in their lives before). I still liked it though and by some coincidence I got an old Win95 compaq notebook to play with from a friend.
I started playing around with the CMD prompt and batch files and could apply some of the things I had learned on the TI, like GOTO or If statements. I still didn't know what I was doing of course, and so it happened that I used the > file pipe when trying to compare two values. Suddenly there was a file with some code fragments and I started to get what I had done. I put the file pipe into an endless GOTO loop and was amused how those few lines filled up the whole desktop with nonsense files. I went on to refine this a little so I could control it with another file that acted as a kill switch when present. Over the next weeks I played some more with it and made it write out and start another batch file that would check whether the original script was still there and recreate it if not.
That notebook was so large and heavy I could not bring it to school, so I wrote all code by hand on paper and typed it in when I got home, that way I could still code in class when I was bored and no one would notice.
So my first ever "program" that I wrote myself was some lousy malware.5 -
When you come home from work and try to play some throwback N64 to escape the world of code for a few hours and you get hit with this nonsense...
-
So we’ve taken over from a project team that disbanded... read: “cut their contracts because fuck this, I can earn more working for better people”.
Me and one other guy have been tasked with saving this heap of shit.
Obviously the project guys left saying “it’s nearly done, just this one feature”. Because cut contracts are easier to deal with if “everything is almost done”.
We jump on and find that’s not the case at all... this thing, is a beast, a big old stats analysis program... so we’re like “cool, let’s see what’s going o...OH MY GOD”.
The “recalculation” function was core to this POS. The contractors had done it in C# through entity framework... it took 24 hours to run, over a reasonably small data set that was due to double every 2-5 years.
So... here’s the deal, it ran over night.... then failed. And no cunt had noticed. Entity framework “can’t commit because I’m muddled up as fuck, did you really just put the whole db in EF in memory to work with it?” Exception.
Que 6 months of me and my lead doing the job properly.
Anyway, the failure: I ended up in Hospital again with a Crohn’s flare up... about 5 months in.
Fuckall to do with all this nonsense I just wanted to tell a story. it was an interesting/fun project to fix and my lead was a legend... so happy days.
Similar story, different set of contracted devs... they’d been defining requirements with the business users using the term “Risk” which the business users knew as a group of risks.
The domain model had been written RiskGroup<>— -
I never liked YAML. But lately, I'm starting to dislike it more and more.
I mean, wtf is that?
- digest YAML input -- a valid YAML
- digest JSON input -- a valid YAML
A language that embeds another language.
Can it be any more confusing..?
Sure it can. the
```
script:
- echo "John said: hello there"
```
will fail YAML linter, because, even though I used quotes, yaml sees `echo "John said` as an object key
I think I'm yet to find more nonsense with YAML. And eventually, I'll grow to hate it.8 -
Somebody, anybody, tell me what I'm missing here that makes this get mass-produced.
I've always been a bit if a pyro, and ive certainly made random, pointless texh for no valid reason beyond "why not?'. I also have dealt in international OEM sourcing and manufacturing. I even missed the selfie stick boom back before anyone knew they existed... muktille faxriries I've done signing business with were selling them(dead stock) below cost due to lack... silly me thought they were too ridiculous; one of my hudiness cards literally says ".Really cool stuff you almost alwats want... but never need". Most nonsense novelty is the majority of one if my businesses
...but seriously... who thinks a rechargeable battery, compact soeakers, and lit gas canister is a good idea??
I think I may need to re-rank my mental list of most asinine things I've encountered this week... wsl GUI capability built-in with default images and the reminder of pointoess features like passwords for groups, seem less worthy now.
27 -
What the hell is WRONG with Windows 10. Why does it need so much storage space? I get to only use 219+38.6+13.8 GiB and Windows gets to use 564 GiB of data to piggyback on data and storage space to push nonsense updates to user who do not want them. Use your own fucking servers, MS. I wish this fucking OS burns in hell.
10 -
A continuation of the worst idiot that I worked for, in possibly the worst project of the world. ( The guy who said youtube watching doesn't cost data, downloading the videos offline does)
Guy sends me a template for a patent application.. I ask him why, and he's all secretive until he takes me into a meeting with the patent officers of the organization to reveal his grand plans.
Here goes his idea. He wanted to file a patent for a sonar made for large vehicles in India. His idea was that people in India are used to overtake busses while they turn and they are overrun by the large vehicles. True to some extent but a completely overkill solution for a minor issue that could be solved by educating the masses. I try to explain this to him, and he's pissed off. Starts throwing random, made up stats at me saying 2000 people die everyday on every street. I'm like WHAT??? I look at the patent officer, and he gives me that "don't look at me dude, I'm just here for any questions about the patent process" look. He's busy doodling in his notebook while I try everything possible to invalidate the stupid idea my client has barfed all over the meeting room and the attendants. I even bring out the technical challenges leaving aside the practicality of the nonsense. I asked him how to distinguish between a pedestrian, a parked vehicle, a dog, a cow.. To which he responds with an on the spot thoughtless answer. Heat signatures!! In 5 minutes we went from sonar to heat maps in a tropical country such as India.. He now wants a hybrid solution.
He was about to start yelling when I caved in on the condition that I want nothing to do with the idea after I finish the patent application.. Made up some document and sent it to the asshole, only to never hear about it again.. Thank god for that.. R&D my ass..7 -
FUCK YOU GOOGLE
I feel I have zero control as a developer.. You made the shittiest choice by bringing in intellij , you made an even worse choice by adding gradle.. You add thousands of configuration options to manifests, layouts but provide no common place to find documentation for them.. This is just nonsense.. I've wasted endless hours figuring out your dex limits, proguard rules.. It's just frustrating.. Could you be anymore counterintuitive with your unit testing framework! Honestly it's a steaming pile of shit..5 -
Been asked to give a lecture to the freshmen at ye olde alma mater.
They are gonna pay for the air ticket, the shuttle to and from campus and a couple nights at a fairly ok hotel.
Feeling like a fucking rockstar.
...
Gave the lecture. Only half those kids spent the whole time on their phones. My old drinking buddy and now a professor at the school said it was more direct attention than one could expect at a music concert.
...
Feeling kinda scared about how young women dress nowadays, but I do am an old indian dude, so what do I know?
Also, since when is lifting weights and running a half-marathon a requirement for a degree in computer sciences? Turing might have been an Olympian, but I'm pretty sure that since the invention of the integrated circuit my people have spent more time in labs than in gyms. That is not true for those kids.
Maybe it's a freshmen thing, and they will age out of that healthy living nonsense. Maybe the real world will crush it under bills and tuition loan repayments.
...
Tried to ask the university for a refund of the hotel and taxi bills that I've paid out of pocket. Two hours in four different queues and two opposite-sode-of-campus buildings. Suddenly remembered the true meaning of the word "Kafkaesque".
...
Remembering the old uni days with some still-in-grad-school / faculty old friends and getting drunk in the old watering holes? Priceless.2 -
Today, I fell for a prank that someone tried to pull on me several years ago that I was too smart for at the time.
I was told that it was impossible to crush an egg with one hand. I knew that was nonsense so I never tried. This morning I was feeling adventurous so I tried it.
As it turns out, it is definitely possible to crush and egg with one hand and that when an egg pops, its contents get all over everything.5 -
Couple of the senior devs were reviewing some legacy service code, vilifying everything that was done. Too many files, not enough files, too many lines of code, etc. Standard Monday-Morning-Quarterback nonsense. Then they came across Thread.Sleep() in various exception handlers. The passive-aggressive -bleep- hit the fan. 'Idiot', 'Moron', "People don't know how to code..", etc. dog-pile rants for a good 5 minutes.
I thought "Code is only a couple of years old and had very little changes..I'll bet the original developer is still here."
So I look at the change history and sure enough the original developer was one of the dog-pilers, and the other dev changed the code just last year. Comments like "Major refactoring", "Increased Performance", etc and the changes were only removing comment blocks, and other stylecop suggestions. Oh...there was one change was Thread.Sleep(6000) to Thread.Sleep(1000). I guess that did technically "increase performance"
Would I get fired if I said "Shut the -bleep- up you -bleep-ing -bleep- heads" ? Hmm...probably. Better keep my opinions on devrant. -
The bouba/kiki effect is a non-arbitrary mapping between speech sounds and the visual shape of objects. It was first documented by Wolfgang Köhler in 1929 using nonsense words.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...17 -
This is gonna get someone illogically upset, but idc about that.
I know it's ignorance of semantics but I'm tired of propagated ignorance changing the meaning of things.
Non-binary is NOT a legitimate term for whatever 'gender' you are!
I get what *whoever-started-it* was going for, but it's NOT valid. If you want to say that youre not male or female, fine... just don't abuse binary systems to do it. Just say youre non-bool/anti-boolean or identify with one of the, apparently 50, shades of gray.
I keep getting into logical loops to nowhere about this nonsense. No one is even defining what's supposed to be the 1 vs the 0. Which then makes me think '1 must be male... genitalia=1 in many ways...' which then sources back to the historic validity of males vs undervalued/less than human interpretations of females...
Then <brake>.
Ofc these people aren't going into the historical significance... they don't even realise how binary works! Ofc they'd have no clue that all 0s= no data... and 0s only have significance when viewed in placement to the 1s.
Let's all start using proper terminologies, like non-boolean. Maybe i can start a trend by paying people pennies to learn/teach wtf a boolean value is, and that binary can represent anything. With proper encoding the array is limitless... so being binary is actually a giant spectrum... therefore makes no sense to be "non-binary".
Ok... im done. It had to be said.
Who wants to start identifying as non, or educating wtf is, boolean with me???42 -
There is no damn worldwide shortage of Cobol devs. There's a few localised, highly publicised cases where those devs are needed, those cases are diminishing fast, and that's about it.
Please stop touting this nonsense that everyone who learns Cobol can just drop into a job and make 6 figures. The only thing that's going to come out of this is a worldwide surplus of devs who learnt Cobol, and are now gobsmacked no-one wants to hire them to work in an antiquated language they have zero real-world experience in. -
Rant!
Why enforce a 90 character limit in code file (C++)
It does not make readability any better..
you either break up functions that barely exceed the limits
or
start making nonsense variable names just because they are short.20 -
How to conduct yourself in a job interview
Simple test"Write a for loop".
First, write some nonsense bullshit for twenty minutes. Then, when you realize time is up, pass to the next question. After write more nonsense bullshit in SQL and jQuery, it's time to breath fast and panic.
Deliver your exam.
Pack your stuff and go to a cave where nobody ever will find you, cry the next three years and commit to a life of self punishment, shame and tears.
That's how you nail a job interview, suckers.3 -
Our teacher who teaches us Linux doesn't even know how to run shell script. Every time we ran into the problem he is like you should solve by it yourself. Most of his lectures seems nonsense to me and looks like I'm wasting my time and money7
-
First of all sorry for the bad picture. Let's move on...
Deleting this method like:
Who the hell did this nonsense?
I just took a picture of it so I could post it here and rant about it.
Sure felt stupid after deleting it for not thinking about a protected method in the parent class that is part of an API.
So... Yeah....
I was feeling too confident in my skills lately anyway
6 -
Big Big kudos to all my friends who develop and mantain Safari! :D Your work is surely appreciated. How could i live without that ...pitiful, terrible, broken, Disgraceful, full of incompatibilities, slow, version swarmed piece of utter and definitive Garbage? :D
I really really hope that one day every company on earth will stop supporting or requiring your torture device and we'll have an internet free of your nonsense :D6 -
// Posting this as a standalone rant because I've written the best piece of code ever.
// Inspired by https://devrant.com/rants/1493042/... , here's one way to get to number 50. Written in C# (no, not Do diesis).
int x = 1;
int y = x + 1;
int z = y + 1;
int a = z + 1;
int b = a + 1;
int c = b + 1;
int d = c + 1;
int e = d + 1;
int f = e + 1;
int g = f + 1;
int h = g + 1;
int i = h + 1;
int j = i + 1;
int k = j + 1;
int l = k + 1;
int m = l + 1;
int n = m + 1;
int o = n + 1;
int p = o + 1;
int q = p + 1;
int r = q + 1;
int s = r + 1;
int t = s + 1;
int u = t + 1;
int v = u + 1;
int w = v * 2 * -1; // -50
w = w + (w * -1 / 2); // -25
w = w * -1 * 2; // 50
int addition = x+y+z+a+b+c+d+e+f+g+h+i+j+k+l+m+n+o+p+q+r+s+t+u+v;
addition = addition * 2;
if (addition == w)
{
int result = addition + w - addition;
Console.Writeline(result * 1 / 1 + 1 - 1);
}
else
{
char[] error = new char[22];
error[0] = 'O';
error[1] = 'h';
error[2] = ' ';
error[3] = 's';
error[4] = 'h';
error[5] = 'i';
error[6] = 't';
error[7] = ' ';
error[8] = 'u';
error[9] = ' ';
error[10] = 'f';
error[11] = 'u';
error[12] = 'c';
error[13] = 'k';
error[14] = 'e';
error[15] = 'd';
error[16] = ' ';
error[17] = 'u';
error[18] = 'p';
error[19] = ' ';
error[20] = 'm';
error[21] = '8';
string error2 = "";
for (int error3 = 0; error3 < error.Length; error3++;)
{
error2 += error[error3];
}
Console.Writeline(error2);
}5 -
I don't know my problem is. I lost my motivation to code, my enthusiasm and excitement to read a code and solve a problem. My love of my life for 6 years whom I thought she's the one, gave up on us. It was a long journey, lots of ups and downs, but really worth the time and sacrifice. Now, she's doing good, very happy on her life judging from her social media. Can't believe she just moved for 2 months. To be honest, i want her to be happy but quite bitter that she just moved on quite fast. And I don't if this is the reason why I lost my motivation and enthusiasm to code. Or maybe I just don't like the project we're working on. Well, I really don't like it since it's a mobile game, I really want to build webapp or mobile app but it's too late to change the project.
I'm not like this, I used to code until morning without noticing the time, excited to solve a problem that stuck on me for quite a while. I really became a lazy person right now. I feel the pressure to finish the project but I don't see myself working on it, I don't feel interested reading a code. I just play computer games instead of working on my project during my free time. I don't know if I'm depressed. I socialized with people, have fun, happy when I'm with them, but when I'm alone, sadness starts to creep in. I feel like there's an empty void in myself. I don't know, i just want the motivation and energy to work on my project. Im tired, lazy, and feeling burnt out. If you read until this very last sentence, thank you and I'm sorry for reading this nonsense.5 -
Man I hate programming tests that have no practical application. I'm not doing one yet, just saw an example question that made me go...ok...I kinda get what you want but..why would you EVER need this. Googled and the consensus is that..*drum roll* you wouldn't ever need it because it's only useful to see if someone can solve it in an interview.
Why not give actual problems or at least actual test cases of things that way you can see if people can solve actual real life problems. Wouldn't that prove that people can reason their way through things or not? See if they can provide a good solution for something that someone else has already encountered instead of some nonsense that wouldn't have an actual practical application?
Maybe it's just me but if you give me a problem that sounds like it's useless for some reason my brain just goes, "Ah this sounds like it's useless, better not actually devote all my brain power to this"...4 -
In my firm we've got a shadow IT team where I'm part of. Sometimes we need to call the "IT support team" who are lacking the knowledge of common IT sense. Some weeks ago I called them up to extend our ip range since we've got no rights to do it ourselve. They replied with: please disconnect the cable and reconnect it. (Bear in mind our lease time was 24h)
Some other guy called me up to check my pc for viruses... he was looking for the task manager so I pushed ctrl shift esc and he asked me wondering HOW did you do this? He even didn't know things like %appdata%. I had a talk with him and gave him as much tips as I could.
The poor fella
Thanks for reading my nonsense post1 -
You know that moment, when you look for something on wikipedia, and after few hiperlinks you are reading about influence of penguins on Mars' day length or othen nonsense?
Just happened to me like 4th time when reading Django documentation. It is so well written and easy to understand, that I just click and click and want to go deeper, and then realise I have to read what I need, because I never ever got to it in the first place.
Gotta love the people who make such docs. I never could, and prbly will.1 -
What paradoxes taught me.
Perhaps each time a paradox is encountered in mathematics, there is a useful distinction or mathematical tool hiding in plain sight, one that hasn't be discovered or utilized. For cursory evidence I give you: division by zero, the speed of an arrow at any point in flight, and calculus.
Maybe this isn't true for some paradoxes, or even most, but as time goes on I suspect people will discover it is more true than they might have thought.
Undefined behavior and results aren't nonsense: They look to me like golden seams to be explored for possible utility when approached from uncommon angles with uncommon problems.6 -
Stayed up coding all night to make sure things worked nicely. An hour before I left work yesterday, received 5 other never spoken off tasks.
none of the communication went directly by me, I just had to hear out the nonsense, but did a complete integration half a year ago
managed to do 3,8 of those task after working out and finishing the first set. became 5am.
might be because I went mental and have synced up 2repo's with idem dito codebase to be up to date to eachother (don't ask me why this is setup this way, I don't get half of their logic, hence why it doesn't work until I silently patch stuff out)
overslept by an hour.. yay me.
inb4 being fired
(no time for a capitalisation and spellcheck on this rant either, 9.30am now, tired af)3 -
Teach data structures by showing how they're used in real life situations. Don't make us do some nonsense puzzle shit. For example, a friend of mine is learning stacks/queues right now and his assignment is to build a simple HTML parsing algorithm to determine whether an HTML file is valid. This shows the student a practical use of the data structure and reinforces that this shit actually does get used in real life.
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man, those hours.... some god, please kill the bastard responsible for this shit...
(
in the picture is like:
weight: beautician
occupation: "" --empty string
)
1 -
Fuck, I want to report a bug to KDE, but the more I think of it the more it looks like it's someone who implemented the shit.
It's a feature!
For some fucking reason KDE launcher overrides the commands from one of my programs with its shortcut entries. That's mostly OK.
Now, the problem is that if for some reason the shortcut goes broken, KDE makea sure it is stores in some sort of database, so that even if you delete it from the disk you will still have a broken link overriding the real command.
Until here it's OK. The thing is that, if you delete the shortcut , you will be prompted with a message showing its contents, asking if is it secure to launch the corresponding shortcut?
I'm like, what? Man I deleted the file, there's no shortcut anymore, just let it go and show me the original command.
why would I want you to store previously deleted shortcuts so you may make sure I launch my programs through them?
PS: forgot to tell the whole problem started from a bug in another program, which for some nonsensical reason creates shortcuts calling system commands through itself rather than just calling them out. The result is that once this program is removed all the shortcuts it created no longer work. -
I hate this joke. It makes zero sense; not something I'd expect to see all over an app for devs!
A factory creates something, if I already have a problem, why would I need a factory to create more?
3 -
I’m 20, but i use vim, not because i feel superior or more clever than others. At first i hated it but by the time i said im gonna learn using that sucker which i did. I’m writing Python and thought maybe by using vim i add nonsense complex to my life. Tried atom which i was using before. After 10 minutes i gave up and opened vim.3
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Alright, let's talk about Scrum Masters. Honestly, I just can't wrap my head around why they're even a thing. It's like someone decided to invent a job title for a role that's already covered by other folks on the team.
I mean, think about it. Who's usually sorting out the team's issues, making sure everyone's on the same page, and keeping the project on track? That's right, it's the project manager or the lead dev. They're already in the trenches, dealing with the nitty-gritty, so why do we need this extra layer?
And don't even get me started on this "servant-leader" nonsense. It's like they're trying to be the team's buddy, but they've got no real power to make things happen. It's like being a king without a crown. Who's going to respect that?
Plus, having a Scrum Master often just leads to more red tape. Instead of getting stuff done, we're stuck in endless meetings, talking about process this and methodology that. It's like we're more focused on how we work instead of actually working.
The best teams I've seen don't need a Scrum Master to babysit them. They need a real leader, someone who's not afraid to make the tough calls and who can give them the tools they need to kick ass and take names.
So, in a nutshell, I think Scrum Masters are about as useful as a chocolate teapot. It's high time we ditched this outdated role and got back to doing what we do best: building awesome stuff.8 -
The CTO was on stage at the annual employee meeting. After some time he said:"well,I never wanted to hire X and Y. They're doing nothing but nonsense and the technic they are using is nothing but a hype."
The technic he talked about: Java, object oriented programming and cloud applications...3 -
when you work on a bug about fixing mistakes made on a story completed by somebody else
you then get approached with having to do petty unrelated UX stuff in the neighbouring area and the administrative nonsense with it
fuck u jira2 -
Is it just me or are all the stoopid people in middle management? Why do these clueless people always impose completely nonsense requirements? Like 'You have to process all entered client data but you are not allowed to store it, nowhere, because of GDPR, storing data is evil!' But when customer logs on all his not persisted data has to be pushed to the frontend immediately. WTF THIS IS CRAZY5
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bruuuuuuuuuh I got an email asking for tech LatinX people to join for a talk on our problems facing x shit in tech.
As a Mexican American (I am more American than Mexican, but whatever) and your standard gun tootin Texan: fuck you, do not call me LatinX
I know both English and Spanish (and other languages that won't disclose here because fk u) well and believe that adding such buuuuuuuullshit to my beautiful Spanish is utter nonsense.
I sent it to the network admin and ask him to block them fuckers from ever sending emails my way ever again as spam.
LatinX....what a fucking joke10 -
!dev
Decided to spend more time on LinkedIn to familiarise myself and start looking for potential employment opportunities.
For past month or so, I've seen few decent opportunities, which is a nice start. However, for every decent post, I've come across:
- About a hundred of posts by self-proclaimed crypto experts who spout absolute gibberish and somehow get thousands of likes. 5 min google search and absolute minimum knowledge of economic theory discards 99% of their claims and statements
- Handful of idiotic "career advice" blog posts
- Numerous posts, both bashing and helplessly supporting shitty recruiter practices
- more crypto nonsense
- People jerking themselves off for running a profitable business (company launched a 1-5months ago)
Really starting to hate the platform, seems like all the integrity it had before becoming fully mainstream, has gone down the drain and it's become a straight up corporate circle jerk1 -
So... the "boss" was getting really annoying asking for nonsense with a shitty attitude and for some stupid reason i said "I'm Mr. Meeseeks. Look at me!". The reference didn't click, but the insult was there.
That's a way to fuck things up. -
I wanted to update my previous rant in the comment but what happened is such a fucking nonsense I think it deserves its own.
For those who don't want to look what it is, just another C++ noob (aka me) complaining about how the language was a bitch to him by throwing a random SEGFAULT on release while it didn't show up on debug. Welp.
Half an hour and a ton of std::cout later (thought I would try to read a disassembly ? Think again) I figured out what was the problematic section of code. And guess what ? It was a section I didn't even modify and I never had problems with. Something completely unrelated to what I was rightly imagining causing the issue.
To identify which exact subsection was throwing the error to my face I added more tag code.
Rubbing my hands and ready to fix the fuck out of this damn shit, I built it, launched it…
And all of a sudden the code worked.
All I did. Was to add more cout to know which line fucked up. And now it works.
So. Serious question now: is it a clear sign from heaven I should stop working with such languages and should go back in my shitty high level languages kindergarten ?10 -
I have decided to leave my fucking corporate job because of nonsense going on with the management fuckers. a high throughout distributed system with multiple components interacting together was asked to deliver in 2 fucking days starting from scratch.
I am asking for some tips regarding freelancer or remote job work. How do you guys find clients ? From where do I start ? I feel lost4 -
Project manager asked me to directly communicate with our client.
BUT, he told me what to say and what not to say.
BULLSHIT! All of these business "etiquettes" and formalities are just a waste of time for both the clients and us.
If only I could, I would simply cut all these nonsense and just communicate honestly.2 -
I wish I could do the following legally....
Spank someones butt with good horse hair whip.
Draw smilies with sriracha on the butt.
Let him write 1000 times "I'll keep my half knowledge and thus profound dumbness to myself - or ask politely instead of barking orders" with his red hot sriracha butt.
Let him lick it clean, his filthy mouth needs it.
And hopefully. Hopefully. Pain would teach him the lesson that his half assed knowledge and narcisstic behaviour does more harm than good - especially to himself.
Backstory: I had a full dual phone conference and video chat experience because someone was so full of shit... Eh. Narcisstic self believe. That he nearly destroyed an ongoing migration, made upper management nervous, and letting me deal with the still ongoing migration, conference / chatting and so on.
And yes. The date for migration was fixed. He could have spout his nonsense before.
Damn it, so many ideas to turn a human body into !!*!"!!*!*!*!!*
He launched a fullblown discussion on a saturday during an ongoing migration based on outdated knowledge claiming the right to know it all. R I P.6 -
Fun times with postscript:
I have two EPS files that are generated by a program.
In there there is the postscript describing the file (~6000 lines) and then the preview image as TIFF. Each ps and TIFF image on its own renders correctly and looks good.
Now the fun part: The ps in combination with one of the images works, with the other image it doesn't. Somehow the ps-renderer tries to interpret the TIFF-data, which yields nonsense and the renderer stops altogether. But only for one file not for the other. And it's definitely not the ps, because if I switch the preview images the other file doesn't work.1 -
Literally every single task except one has me waiting on stuff from other people. The remaining ask is waiting on root access approved for a server
Uugh. I'd take dealing with some obscure bug for 4 hours over this nonsense1 -
Fuck these frequent "URGENT TO REVIEW" pull requests with 10+ files changed by lead each time, amirite or amirite?1
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Last week: Build out a landing page and contact form in Pardot. Deliver to client after a quick QA pass through.
Friday: Get nasty message from client via basecamp about how the entire page looks like complete crap. We're also very unprofessional and can't deliver a simple request, while we charge a premium for our services.
So I, wondering what I managed to screw up so horribly, hop on to the test page I sent them. Except, its different and looks like crap.
They edited the page after it was sent to them and are pissed it doesn't match the comps they sent over. So I edit it back - except for the form. The one they added selects and textarea boxes to. Fields they didn't include in their comp and there was no mention of them wanting to use.
Today: Phone call with client. Every single complain they have about the page template they delivered all goes back to one of 3 things.
1. Their designer doesn't know how to use their global styles in his designs. So when things match their global styles (as they specifically asked for) they don't understand why they don't match the comp in a side by side view.
2. They change their mind on a design after the page was built. They won't admit this is the case and want to blame someone else for it not looking the way they want it. You know, "Spirit and Style of their current site"
3. They're idiots.
So now, I put aside a much more fun React project for an Amazon owned grocery chain and work on this nonsense. -
I freaking hate slow IDEs, especially ones made in Java.
I used to use an IDE/text editor called geany, and it was great, you could do almost every language in it and it worked great. It was fast, and efficient, it was a no-nonsense editor. That was when I was a kid, but I got in univ and got a job, so I had to start using big boy """""enterprise""""" IDEs like eclipse.
Eclipse, netbeans, and intellij (basically every Java based IDE except BlueJ) are exactly what is wrong with IDEs. They are clunky editors that frankly would be better off gone. They are slow, eat RAM like crazy (like most Java software). You just CANNOT have eclipse open for extended periods of time, because it WILL take up too much resources and get slow as heck. Android Studio (based on intellij) is a nightmare to work with. It just does not want to cooperate with you (I will agree they have improved a lot though).
I cannot believe I am saying this, but even the electron based IDEs like atom and code-oss are better than them. They are very easily expandable, something that Java was supposed to be, but is not. They have tons of plugins. Even if its not there, you can make one without having to spend a lifetime making the plugin! They look good. I never thought that going from IDEs with """""enterprise""""" UIs to something modern like code-oss would feel this great. Its ridiculous, I don't want to create a darn project for every single file that I want to edit, I just want syntax highlighting for a single .sh file that I want to edit right now. A project is just a way to logically define what is one "unit" or a "container for multiple files", you know what else is that? A simple directory.
Also I don't want 9 billion .xml files for the IDE to store its crap. Just make a .vscode like folder to hide your shit.11 -
i found playing with arduino is never-ending fun. and then i tried Raspi and feeling the same. now i buy a bunch of raspi and trying to cluster them up, just for another random project.
yeah this is clearly nonsense. this is myself when my boredom gets high enough. No, vacation is not helping, trust me i've been camping in a jungle for 5 days and the next week i go to the beach. this is bad.
making things worse, My way of life is like any ordinary people (or maybe a developers) but turned upside down for example I program, learning for fun, and going vacation is just another medical need that i need to follow.
I am an university student, studying IT. I've been programming since 6, and geeking anything around technology and astronomy till now. this is my third semester and i don't get challanged enough for this kind of curricullum. i need some kind of project that even i don't think about any number of money anymore, but just enough to challange me up. just need to get rid my boredom.
sorry for ranting from a to z, this is just buzzing around my mind. -
Dude GoogleAuth is pure nonsense magic. On one line you get your auth-instance from gapi.auth2.init..
But then you render the auth-button with a static method aka gapi.signin2.render (which has some kind of success and error handlers, but don't worry, they fire randomly, they won't help you debug this api mess)
SOME-FUCKING-HOW this static signin2.rendershit knows of your auth2 instance and it works. But actually it makes no sense and is just a big mess of api-calls. Google, get your shit together, this ain't pretty.
Oh and forget your informative console.log.. this shit will get erased everytime you try something because of "Navigated to https://accounts.google.com/o/...". why ever the fuck this clears the console even tho it doesn't affect the top window. So preserve that fucking log and drown in a mass of bullshit.
In the end, as it is with everything, it somehow works. But FFS that's some weird api design Google has going on..4 -
!(dev|rant)
I just got an old refurb for the garage to run my camera capture stuff, as the raspberry pi wasn't cutting it. I thought for a split second about leaving the legit version of Windows 10 that came with it on it, and trying to do some in-home streaming over steam, but I found out very quickly that an old corporate refurb is not going to cut it for game streaming. And with all the complete nonsense you have to abide to make Windows usable(ie: disabling stuff you don't want), it's not going to be any use to me in Windows if it can't stream.
Also, for some reason, Windows just wouldn't use the built-in NIC at all. It reported the cable was unplugged, and just absolutely would not work. So, Debian it is, and lo and behold! The NIC works like a champ now. The camera capture works brilliantly too, so now I can turn off my desktop at night.
Linux just works. Windows, more and more all the time, is just more trouble than it's worth.2 -
So my friend had an idea for a game and asked me if I could help him develop it. Now, he understands how the code works and can even write quite a bit himself. On several occasions (including today) this happened:
*writes code*
*tests code*
Me: Hmm... this isn't working like it's supposed to
Friend: It looks pretty good, maybe check to see if everything is in the right order
*checks code*
*tries alternative solution*
*checks again*
Me and friend: Well this is even worse than before
*presses ctrl+z a lot to go back to the original*
*opens new project*
*writes new code for same purpose*
*checks code*
Both of us: IT WORKS!!!
*checks again just to be sure*
Both of us: IT STILL WORKS!!!
*compares new code to original code*
Me: It's the exact same code with different variable names!!! Why did this not work before?
Friend: No idea
*puts new code into main program*
*it still doesn't work*
Reasons Java makes me cry sometimes4 -
I just read about the 'Learn to Code' nonsense. It seems some journalists told coal miners to learn coding for a living. Wtf.. As a person doing formal CS education after 1 year of work, i take offense for that comment. Coding jobs are dragged to the ground by these comments which imply that coding is a no skill, for everyone job. Opinions ?3
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man... tons of people are on the bootstrap train here.. I'd only use that if I wanted to double the size of my codebase and get 0 value out of it.5
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Modern hardware is rubbish. I recently donated a load of computers from the 1970s and 1980s to a technology museum, they all worked well and could still be used and set up in the museum's displays. My more recent stuff, from the last few years, I decided to sell on eBay. Some of it just had to be thrown out, mostly due to non-replaceable batteries that would no longer charge. What nonsense is this? Why is it easier to use a 35-year-old computer than a 3-year-old Chromebook or 5-year-old iPad?5
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Just had a meeting about what our product's vision was going to be. Without actually talking about what that vision was. It was a statement of the business goal amd some nonsense about how we were going to pick tickets based on reaching said business goal.
Like, yeah. That's what we have been doing. You are not new here so why are you acting like it. And yet these people are the ones who make more money than me. I need to start saying more obvious things. Maybe I'll be made a director.4 -
some African elders who cant just let a young person be a young person
if you can't do without minding your business, just ask me what I am looking at or doing on my phone. I'll turn the screen to you and explain.
they just start this very long unnecessary talk about young people and phones
the fact that this fellow doesnt even know me, never been to my house, just met me on a trip is just talking nonsense
blah blah blah blah
you went to school to sir! but you're here doing business. is that your degree2 -
You know what makes no sense and sucks?
I call it "metamedia" (whatever dafuq the genre is actually called).
I mean these books/podcasts/movies about how someone did something. Actually more or less it's just a biography of some dude who did something somewhen, called "The <name of dude> principle". And most of them could be just a really long interview in some newspaper. But there is no money in newspapers, right? Better publish it as book and all the other platforms/things used for enjoyment before this storm of biographies started.
Audible is full of these and I do enjoy informing myself about the success of some Elon Musk but at some point its fucken enough.:D -
After working for weeks writing sophisticated Scala code, and building à team of react devs working on this for months, these fuckers come to me with let's go the cms route. I would like to sincerely declare, fuck this company and I hope it crashes and burns. I know start-ups are constantly changing and iterating but this is straight up nonsense.8
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Im on a Team Project on my University, I'm so salty because a girl on my team yesterday got angry with me because I committed when she was working on something, and that she doesn't like how I code.
2 hours later she made a giant commit with so many unnecessary code and removed working functionality and changed to a nonsense interface all because she was mad with me, now the code doesn't work and it's ugly and she is mad.
I cannot handle it 😭3 -
Okay, let's admit this, being a programmer, I never heard of devRant. The thing that made me join this platform was that it was giving away some free goodies, please don't hate me xD. I thought this would be like any other meme sharing platform where all nonsense is talked. But boy, how wrong I was. I ended up, using this application all the time. The people here, they are just amazing, I learned a lot here.
But the irony is, that I never received free goodies xD.5 -
You know what's worse than having to come up with a new password every time you create an account? Forgetting your password every time you try to log in!
I swear, it's like my brain has a selective memory when it comes to passwords. I can remember every lyric to a song from 10 years ago, but I can't remember the password I created yesterday.
And don't even get me started on password manager software. You would think that having all of your passwords stored in one place would make things easier, but nope. I've forgotten my password for my password manager so many times that I'm starting to think I need a password manager for my password manager.
But seriously, why do we even need passwords in the first place? Why isn’t there an easier one stone kills all solution to all these password authentication nonsense?
I could remember when it was all letters, then forced to use letters + numbers…
then later forced to include symbols…
and then forced to make it lengthier…
and then solve puzzles after getting it right…
and after all the stress now we are forced to find nemo from a set of images.
I thought the misery would end there but nope. Now some platform forces 2FA like dude seriously?
For God’s sake we built self driving cars already! Why can’t one just exist without a password? Why do we always end up in a password cycle?
And please don’t say shit about oauth because if your password master (i.e: google) fucks you in the ass then all your oauth accounts are gone for good!
I'm currently having an existential crisis about the meaning of passwords in our modern society. Shit is crazy when I ponder about it I get worried.12 -
I once had to write a feature, which should allow the user to login and edit an appointment, which was automatically set. All the data we got, came from an incredibly unreliable API. And with incredible unreliable I mean like heisenbug-level unreliable.
The API spoke perfectly unreadable xml and was a horror to work with.
After a few weeks of me being messed with by this shit piece of an API, I finally got something which did kind of work sometimes.
Proper error handling has been added later and just before I was done, fixing all the flaws of their data management and nonsense status codes (not http status codes) which rarely correlated in at least some way with their data, our client said "scrap this, we don't want it anymore"
Many hours and effort gone, this thing worked almost perfectly. -
Well, apples terrible keyboard is back after a short hiatus. It worked almost flawlessly for ONE update, but it's now back to its terrible illogical awful nonsense.2
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One of the guys I go to college with asked me for help. I took one look and saw his variable names...
int numberOfCarsInParkingLotSinceLastChecked = 0;
Explained the issue. Or tried. He kept interrupting to ask me about random nonsense ("Would you walk naked into walmart for $500?"). Got fed up, told him to work on it my own.
Fast forward 2 years, and he's erasing my group's planning on whiteboards with "SAVE" on them. Week after week.
I hate that guy.3 -
Weekly Out-Of-Context Thread
I'm looking for comments on rants. Not just any comments people, but comments that are non-sequiters, comments that are hilarious, or make no sense when taken from their original rant.
Anyone participating should link back to the original post to give credit. It would be great to get some regulars in here, but ideally we can prod some people into action that aren't on as much.
POST for our AMUSEMENT SLAVES! POST FASTER I SAY! FASTER!3 -
Sure, boss.. All charts will be changed to 3d so that your clients can spend a Fuck ton of ink printing that report page.. That's become fucking ugly cause of your stupid nonsense. Why the Fuck should 3d plotted charts be more readable? 😤1
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I must assume that whoever designed jinja2 was either on crack, or hadn’t used template systems before. This thing is too fucking complicated, and doesn’t make sense. From their docs:
“Jinja2 supports dynamic inheritance and does not distinguish between parent and child template as long as no extends tag is visited. While this leads to the surprising behavior that everything before the first extends tag including whitespace is printed out instead of being ignored, it can be used for a neat trick.”
My response: “I don’t give a fuck!! I need this fucking website to be fucking done already! I pass data into a fucking template engine, and the engine applies my fucking markdown!! This is bullshit!! Why am I still trying to understand your fucking nonsense?!? AGGJCDJVFD&@!?&@$?)@&!SHHHVBSHK!!!!!!”
*desk flip*
Fuck you to hell you jinja fucker3 -
Kinda often, the ecosystem around C/C++ kinda sucks
Compilers will give you hieroglyphs instead of readable errors.
Including a separate library, or a code generator, into your project is generally hell on earth to set up.
The language server often needs several seconds to come up with suggestions, some of which are complete nonsense.
The language itself lacks many basic features. C++20 will give us so many fancy things but we still can't convert an enum to a string.
I've programmed in C# and lately in Rust, and damn the developer experience there is just so much nicer overall.31 -
i have to edit a few html templates in our database, obviously automatically generated by a visual editor, full of nonsense in it, no line breaks, and i don't have access to a good html editor. fuck me6
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I was sitting down at my desk today, pissed due to some more lack of coffee, and wondering about my future.
It came upon me that I absolutely despise what I am currently doing (job wise). There is a part of me that tells me that things are going to be alright, but that is just some nonsense that my mind makes up to rationalise how terrible it actually is here at this company.
I think that perhaps my abhor for my current position is a little more directed to the people and company that I work for, but I am really just fed up.
I have found quite a liking in terms of web-design. The clients and the work is a lot less stressful than what I am doing now - and I actually enjoy what I am doing. It is nice to see something come to fruition.
Perhaps that's the way to go? God decisions are fucking risky.1 -
Is there a better CLI tool for finding/replacing stuff in files recursively? Other than like..
sed -i '' '/some/nonsense/g'7 -
Received my first recruitment message on LinkedIn today. Generic as fuck "hey your profile looks nice, we have dis thing for you, come take a looksie".
Went ahead and read the whole thing, started laughing while reading requirements:
- own a degree in CS or related field: re-starting college next week
- extensive experience with automation processes: uuuh... I can write bash scripts and gulp tasks, how's that?
- extensive experience with Java, Angular, Selenium and Protractor: sure. Spent two weeks tinkering with those tools. Pretty much an expert already
- two years of experience: not even 6 months into my first job
And some other nonsense
Job would be in a very nice city, extended family lives nearby, actually a nice position. Too bad I am not looking for a job and my classes start on Monday 😂
But hey, at least people are looking at my profile! Yay!3 -
Just found this:
jQuery(document).ready(function($){$(window).load(function(){ /* do stuff here */ }
Nothing else?2 -
Soooo many vendor-sponsored frontend frameworks.
Soon text-to-logic tools will be useful enough so that you only need a client, someone who is both rational *and* can speaks clientese, and a dog.
The client barks some nonsense, the rational person translates it into business logic, some LLM makes it into some nice UI and the dog makes random noises so that the client will feel smart, valued and appreciated.
That nullifies the reasons for so many frontend frameworks because either the LLMs all converge into a single way of doing things or they do not care for which one they choose.1 -
The only time I want a video to autoplay with sound is when I am on a site that is exclusively for videos, like Youtube, or if any other that exists.2
-
Not really a bad review, just that one change was to remove a log where the message was nonsense text I put just to figure if the code block is reached! I felt so unprofessional
-
Is it just me, or is form autofill in the browser just a major PITA for shop owners when people get to the checkout screen? I've had two clients in the past week with problems where users didn't pay attention to their autofill outcomes, or where the form absolutely has to keep a certain value that we've autofilled for them but gets overwritten by their browser. Now there is a shipment of product out in the wind that is going to return to sender and be delayed in a correction cycle. If you've been able to halt this type of nonsense, I'd love to know how you did it.
function ignoreAutoFill() {return browserSitDownAndShutUp;}10 -
When someone says that a company is Java/Python/Ruby "shop", they are implying that company sells those programming languages instead of its products. Would you call macys/nordstorm a cottonshop? See how ridiculous that sounds!2
-
Started new contract recently, their main product is aiming to be some kind of automation holy grail for business, basically low code nonsense integrating with most of the industry standard tools like sap or confluence. Their entire infrastructure is setup manually, slowly transitioning from on premise to AWS. No infra as code, no playbooks, not even scripts, just "engineers" painstakingly clicking the UI. They don't seem to see the irony of being automation company that doesn't use automation, but I'm having a good laugh at least.
-
It’s taken me 20 years to realize that I love tech but hate corporate IT. The thought of spending another 20+ years sitting in meetings listening to people drone on about nonsense, spending countless hours performing system upgrades when all I want to do is code, etc. just makes me sick to my stomach. It’s the same day over and over again.2
-
Dev1: "what was that requirement? I mean, do you remember that little yet hugely important detail ...?"
Dev2: "hmmm sort of ... Maybe it's in one of the emails, possibly 2 months ago. Let's try to find it"
Dev3: "wait, probably Dev1 was not included for some reason in that thread of emails"
Dev2: "no wait, I mean the other, the one we used to talk about those other specifications from previous meeting..."
[and the story goes on]
Now you may think "ok, this event happened once and was a misstep. Shit happens"
Actually, this is the bread and butter in this company I collaborate with. All their requirements are spread across thousands of emails, usually mixed together and possibly forked into different threads. Often people are cut out from conversation because someone forgets to "reply all", other times they're lost in time.
When I asked them "why don't you use some other tool, maybe something more organized and easily searchable, something structured..."
They replied "no no, we prefer to use email for historical reasons"
My brain just melted like chocolate under the sun2 -
Manager: Oh, this feature freeze you where talking about was no joke?
Me: Yes, that's why we have written it into the protocol of the Last Meeting and everyone agreed...
Manager: Thats nonsense, add more Features! -
When did people decide that developing using a tech that doesn't even have a proper command line debugger is a safe bet for a production system?
NodeJS, tower of nonsense... -
i fuckign hate css and never was taught how to read that shit, guess i should learn
or just cobble something passable together and hope i never need do heavy css nonsense again4 -
Have you ever worked for an organization that is not specialized in software development because that is not their main line of business, however, their products are software applications?
If you are, then hi you and me are in the same boat. Currently I have a nice manager and I'm acting as dev lead the strange thing I have a peer that is supposed to be lead as well but I cannot define his position....
In theory he should be scrum master / resource manager which fails at both terribly.
I ended up implementing Agile in the team and deciding what goes and not into the sprint based on quality while this guy just try to squeeze stuff into the sprint, the more the better even with all kinds or problems...
Honestly I'm not sure why he is still in the team since it seems like he only drains the budget, doesn't understand a thing about the products he is working on and every single idea he has is horrible.
Every meeting I have with him I always ended up asking myself "How can somebody be that stupid?" The lack of technical knowledge and even common sense is over 9000 in this one...
It might sound bitter from my end but after two years of dealing with this stupidness of getting people in software development that have no idea what software development is and understand the intricacies of it just because they did an access database or are good at excel is nonsense.
I'm at the verge of quitting and the only thing that is keeping me here is my manager and the fact that the products I am working with are pretty interesting.
Sorry for the long rant but I had to get it out of my chest before it explodes and I directly call out this person.
Not looking for suggestions but if anybody want to chime in go ahead.1 -
In my neighborhood, a 15-year-old girl identified herself as an adult man because of her LGBTQ friend circle, Right now her parents are taking her to psychiatrists!
Now, I don't know what to say. what are my thoughts and emotions regarding the present state of society?
That LGBTQ nonsense goes out of hand.13 -
Fuck external stake holders, like politicians, those know-nothings, that pump their ego by finding multiple "issues" with our software like how we display the privacy data agreement and impose their stupid fucking nonsense rules on our software. Even if it is not part in any official law or GDPR
So there is the request that one needs to scroll down the whole data privacy crap nobody reads until you can press "Continue" and we *have* to implement that shit. Although it is completely out of line with Apple's usual installer handling. Nobody will understand it. It cripples the workflow.
But some Mr. Important demanded it, as if he is protecting users with this and makes a great contribution to the data privacy in our country. Yeah! And guy is so high up, unreachable for us through all the layers of other people, leaving us no time and means to dissuade this shitty request. If all your 'ideas' are so great you should not be allowed to do jack shit.1 -
A jr dev was having an issue registering code with our data pipeline (prefect self hosted).
Turns out he's running vscode to launch a anaconda shell (didn't even know that was a thing) to launch jupyter notebook and running commands in the notebook (didn't know that was possible) all from Windows.
No it doesn't work. His environment configuration isn't right. I told him to just run Linux and get rid of all that nonsense.
Nothing is on git yet and were three weeks in! His code is full of hard coded absolute paths of files on his hard drive... He even had an example app to go buy, with a project layout to copy.
There's no helping some people9 -
I feel like whenever they are pretending you need to know all the patterns by memory, testing you on that, it's a nonsense and it even makes me stop wanting to enter the place.
Im not supposed to know them instantly, i use tools like the internet. Test my ability to solve problems, comnunicate, work in groups, but, specific stuff by memory? Why?5 -
What is the more common word?
abs
Ava
ABC
ABC's
and's <- this one is real
and
iOS seems to think the word "and" ranks last in priority when compared to the other words in the list.
I have had this hyperexpensive irritant for almost a year now, and I still cycle through this list in 90% of anything I type. I love posting to forums and this brick-in-three-years has tainted that. I even bought a mini bluetooth keyboard but it's awkward to use while relaxing.
Don't even get me started on how autocomplete deletes existing parts of the sentence if I don't choose whatever nonsense iOS has decided upon this time. -
At least pretend to have a reason for using checkboxes where the behaviour is obviously a single choice. I know I'm sometimes full of crap. I know I can waste so much time arguing for something I'm wrong about. At least I have arguments to support my approach, and I don't dismiss my mistakes. I don't need you to spend the next 5 minutes changing checkboxes for radio buttons in the mockup, it took dev 5 seconds to replace "checkbox" with "radio" and move on. However, I do need you to know what you're doing, even if it turns to be wrong.
I know this world celebrates people who can do things perfectly: models with perfect bodies, singers with perfect voices, sportsmen with perfect scores, students with perfect grades. I understand that's why you wish to try again so you can do it perfectly.
That's not what the world needs. The world needs people who know why they did what they did. It's drunk drivers who break down in the court, not serial killers. Serial killers know what they did, they know why they did it, and they believe it was the right thing to do; drunk drivers on the other hand had no idea what they did or why they did it, and they try to dismiss their wrongdoings by blaming them on alcohol, not getting a taxi, parking fees, the car, or some other circumstances.
So confront your bullshit for once. Stop searching for excuses to dismiss challenging ideas and prove you can defend your position. Otherwise, don't get angry when your "impeccable" ideas lose to someone who at least tries to defend their nonsense.3 -
I'm pretty sure the talk about the dangers of AI is nonsense. Private Eye magazine was dead on with this:
5 -
To add a bit more context to my last rant.
The following situation happened today and similar situations are at the moment common as fuck.
Situation started roughly 1 1/2 months ago as a deployment failed.
Seemed to be a DNS problem for the devs, so my basic assumption was that they checked their shit.
As I was and I am currently more than swamped, told them it had to wait if it is an DNS issue...
Well.
Backstabbing product manager complained to upper management as it took so long.
Backstabbing manager even went so far to propose alternative solutions - think of switching product to work around issue and throwing away a year of development of a 5 man team...
So additional to my work I had to deescalate and prevent complete nonsense.
Today I finally found time for the problem.
After 2-3 hours of turning every stone inside the DNS setup, cloudflare, loadbalancers, etc...
Well. Devs. Don't trust them.
Turned out the devs misconfigured the environment entirely.
Its not so obvious in this product as it is rather complicated, though the devs documentation explicitly mentioned that if one overrides the configuration for e.g. several languages, one has to make sure to set two env variables for TLS mode...
There was only one set.
:(
8 fucking weeks of backstabbing and blaming others while they could have just read their own fucking documentation and fixed that shit in 5 minutes.2 -
Made a perfectly working algorithm as part of a test in school. Two days later I open the file and it outputs nonsense.
-
A doctor heals, a gardener plants, a baker makes some bread, a driver brings you to a location, only IT is nonsense in the most use cases.
Maybe I will switch one day to another and more useful job which makes more sense7 -
🤬So I spent half an hour at my post office to pick up a certified letter. It turned out to be a paper version of „we have updated our privacy policy” from a company I last dealt with 5 years ago. 🤬🤬🤬
I want to thank my EU lawmakers for always thinking about our logging industry. I still don’t see why I need gdpr, though. I still dont know how the voters can stop this kind of non democratic nonsense in the future.
-
Okay. I look at myself as a kind of intellectual person. My parents are not believers so I came out quiet normal. As engineer and fan of technology I believe in science and I have a fairly complete look at life and universe at whole, I do not need any religional explanation for anything. I do not believe in the conspiracy theories and in any highly organized global secret society who controll us. I have acquired my view and opinions by systematically rethinking every aspect of life and everything I knew and I was thought before, btw this is the reason I stopped to eat animal products too.
But after all this corona shitshow, I really don't know If the current situation is just rolled by stupidity of media and politics or its really some plan of some people. I mean you can legally buy cigarettes with proven death rate of 10%, they recommend you to drink milk while its ultra carcinogenic and like 60% of population is intolerant, you have to wear mask but not gloves while the virus transference is 90% trough hand contact, and there are many many many questions that makes me paranoid. And now this vaccination stuff with countries almost forcing it in population, ahh... Man, This complete story is too irrational and strange. I start to loose my stable belief system and slide out. I noticed that I am not sure and I am just silent when people talk about these things. I hope this nonsense will end soon.43 -
!dev
Why must I always be the guy that has to connect with people?
So I'm applying to a retail job, and the section manager, lets call him Tim, is kinda low energy.
Come in four days later after the first meeting, to just let him know I put in the application. We're talking, talking some more, and he basically wants to hire me but says it usually takes 1-2 weeks for the background. Well that's nonsense for a retail position doing stocking, but alright.
And I'm heading out the door, say to him "dont kill yourself on shift", he doesnt even laugh, just flat affect, monotone, "I know I still got an hour and a half on shift."
And as I'm driving away I'm thinking, that's how the entire conversation was like.
It wasn't just misery or tiredness. The dude, Tim, I'd seen that face and heard that tone before.
Its the behavior of someone who actively doesnt want to be alive.
And as I'm driving away, I'm just thinking, how do I go back? How do I go to this total stranger, who I'm also applying for a job with, who I just met, and say *look, I dont mean to get personal and this is probably uninvited but I know something's up with you. You were like this last time I met you, and you're like it even more now. I know bro. I know. You think no one sees you're going through something, but I do.*
I see shit like this and it's so obvious and by the time I realize I should say something, the opportunity has passed, the moment has passed. And it's like, is it even my place?
But to see someone like that, to be familiar with that look on their face, and to let them walk away...
I just dont know.4 -
I hate meteor. I hate that I have to have everything I do revolve around meteor and it's packages. I hate that I cant implement HMR without support from meteor or tearing my hair out for hours on end. I hate the special implementation of unit tests that have to accommodate for the fact that meteor sucks so much. I hate the encapsulated bubble of "meteor" packages that install themselves outside of my development directory. I hate that I can't use most of the code I find while researching problems because it doesn't work inside of the meteor bubble.
I did not start this project. I did not select meteor as a starting point because I didn't want to implement my own full stack solution, of which there are many that are far better in almost every way, and watch everyone else that touched my code suffer from day one.
If it is the last thing I do, I WILL purge meteor and all of it's nonsense from every line of code in this application even if that means rewriting every line of code in this application.
I will have no mercy. There will be screams of agony, gnashing of teeth and blood will flow down the streets like the rivers of hate that flow in my heart for meteor and all things it stands for.
I will have my vengeance, and it will be terrible.1 -
I work so hard to name things well and yet last year's code is always full of esoteric and misleading nonsense.3
-
!dev (never been less dev related)
I’m off for a few days from tomorrow on.
Have to travel to get some administrative shit ordered..
But I’ll depart the day after tomorrow.
Now I’m half way drunk asking myself why I didn’t take off from Monday on..
Today (Thursday) is my Friday, because tomorrow is off, which is the day I get hammered but it’s not Friday, it’s fucking Thursday..
Somehow bothers me because the days are shifted.
Sometimes I feel a bit like Sheldon cooper..
You get me or am I just talking nonsense?1 -
Do you know https://godbolt.org/ ?
Awesome tool.
Does anyone know about something like this, except a normal offline app, instead of server nonsense?6 -
I hate Vue framework with a passion. The only framework that can rival Vue in terms of being bad is: Apache Wicket for Java.
<template #activator="{ on, attrs }">
<v-btn
v-bind="attrs"
v-on="on"
What does this all mean? I remember seeing these 1 month ago but by now I forgot all about it again. This is nonsense; and the worst part is discoverability: there is no easy way to learn what does this mean, navigate to definition (where "on" is defined?) or something2 -
My most consistent enemy at work is this fucking system I have to work in, holy shit. Not only is there no default support for shit you would really think there should be, no real control over the interfaces with the UI, and the far too complicated method they use to magically make said interfaces, but we also have to use their build environment to build this shitty thing. So builds take anywhere from 4 to 12 minutes a pop and ridiculous style guide will stop the build, no questions asked, for dumb violations like spaces between if and (. And it doesn't catch these, sometimes, until 7 or 8 minutes in. I have wasted so much time on this. And seeing as we work in 2 week sprints that are really 7 to 10 day sprints based on whatever hair goes up my bosses ass and have to deliver feature complete in those two weeks, I can't really afford all this nonsense. I used to joke about having an alcohol problem, but I think I actually may be developing one at this point.
-
Entropy wins. More useless accumulated historical nonsense in each programming language. Complex software stacks impossible to reach the bottom. However C and C++ still there possibly even some Cobol and Fortran zombies. And we devs still writing our ifs and loops for that kind of legacy stuff.
-
I'm working with this stupid ass framework that has a bunch of old style React class nonsense as examples (that's not actually that bad, but) ... AND worst of all every code example revolves around this convoluted thing where:
"How you do a thing."
"Make button, then you make a function that calls X, Y, Z and it opens the thing!"
But that's not the way you'd EVER do it because doing the thing inside the framework's components is COMPLETELY DIFFERENT!
I get wanting to dumb down documentation but this is dumbed down to pointlessness! -
what do you think about the idea of... "pseudo-recursion"?
as in, language construct that looks basically like recursion except one detail that makes it translate into iterative execution where the "recursion" calls just add to the list of "execute in next layer" ...iterator-type variable(?)
also, if you understand what I mean and if it's not complete nonsense, any syntax suggestions that would seem most natural for you? (also for context tell me what language that syntax suggestion mostly draws from (and why))
just a bit of idle thought/idle talk, don't take it too seriously.5 -
Update to my last rant:
I wrote a reply to the person. Not scathing (as I'd have liked it to be) but firm and in a no nonsense way. My manager supported me. My project manager talked with the person to in order to convey what the issue is and to undo any misunderstandings due to written communication (we have different native languages).
I have not received a reply but my project manager told me that they are analyzing the problem now. I was also told that they are not a bad person. ^^
I think I'd like to believe that. We all make mistakes after all. -
The human brain can act really weird sometimes! It makes us behave irrationally, believe in total nonsense, and can even change our memories. However, every decision we make is made for a reason. So what do you think, exactly is it that determines the choices you make?5
-
Like many of you, I'm currently working from home. This is great, and I hope I can stay remote when this is all said and done. That said, there are a few things I don't like. First and foremost, I need to connect to the VPN in order to do a large number of my tasks. This sucks for multiple reasons, the current worst being that I can't use Fiddler while connected to the VPN. This really handcuffs me in certain situations. Anyone currently using a proxy that works while on VPN? I tried a couple of others, including Burp Suite. But they didn't install on my MacBook. Apple didn't like not being able to peer into the depths of their soul, or some such nonsense2
-
I just don't get why CSS shorthands don't get to follow the X-Y pattern, such as margin 10px 5px, as 10px for width and 5px height. WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE THE INVERSE?
I don't use CSS very often, but when I do, I remember how stupid and nonsense that is.1 -
From the career point of view, I've seen many programmers, more or less, in the long run, specialize in the industry|ies they've been working, so the business practices, ins and outs and logics became part of their strong point in that|those industry|ies.
But I found myself on the opposite side, I could care less about the business's practices, etc. because in the end I'm mostly passionate about reaching some technical satisfying accomplishment or a novel approach to solve some kind of problem or just learn new approaches.
So when I'm handed info mostly focused on business practices|logics I just boringly read through it.
How about you?
Obviously business problems and technical feasibility to solve them overlap. But wouldn't be better to have people capable to express their issues more from technical points of view than talking nonsense to someone who's clueless about the business <.<?1 -
I do not like rust's choice to just infer something from how it is named
like if you install a package that begins with "cargo-something" then it becomes a cargo command. this feels janky
also turns out if you have a build.rs file it will build stuff for you when compiling? I just ran into this being described in the docs. well guess what. I have a build.rs file. it isn't being used for that though. I mean hasn't caused any problems, or has it?! I DON'T KNOW
config options seem more explicit than this naming nonsense. I just had to rename my project everywhere so it can be a cargo command. ffs now my git links are broken and shit.
I thought rust was verbose because it knew the merits of being explicit. can they stick to their principles pls8 -
With all the CES nonsense, wouldn't you love it if they didn't make shit smaller and thinner and actually made it the same size as 5 yrs ago. While upgrading battery life and cooling... I see all these new laptops and small form factor pc's and I just think "well there is something to keep me warm in the winter". Priorities people2
-
It would be really nice if bower packages had a consistent naming convention as far as getting to the relevant file path. I'm always surprised how whacky it is. bower_component/special_plugin/code/dist/SpecialPlugin/Script.js ... nonsense!
-
Its so cool having your parents exactly like you( i know its the other way around but... yeah :D) :
1 pm in the afternoon
National holiday
People celebrating the nonsense with colors and balloons outside.
my mom sleeping in her room.
my dad sleeping on sofa.
me sleeping/coding on bed in my room.
...
Good life!
(guess my whole family is born from hibernating ancestors xD) -
How do you deal with coworkers trying to take over areas of your work?
Especially if they are very arrogant or entitled about it?
Cant talk to the boss, boss doesnt care about the issue. Has repeatedly lead to drama in the past with this guy. He likes to point at his chest while legit screaming "I'm the expert! This job belongs to me. Its mine because I was here first."
Even though the job was given to me.
And worse when I push against this nonsense my boss tells me to stop creating drama.
Like wtf. You gave me a job to do, and this asshole is horning in on my work and taking credit.
I got put on backend office work (because I cant afford to take even a day) while I recover and dont know how to deal with this dickhead.1 -
Why is customer support sometimes so shitty? A coworker good a Win10 Laptop (Win7 before) and one program wasn;t working there anymore. So we reached out to the support asking to help us fix it. After over a month later and x-amount of E-mails back and forth. The answer was, you have to upgrade everything (Webserver, Database, Client) to use Win10 (no backwards compatibility). Which is fine, I don't mind upgrading and understand that software sometimes is not backwards compatible. BUT THAT IS SOMETHIGN TO STATE IN THE 2nd E-MAIL. Not an infinity later after a tiring back and forth of nonsense.
-
https://mobile.twitter.com/j4n0/...
Funny linkedIn experiment:
Alejando was curious to see if a nonsense LinkedIn account would also receive job offers. It does! :D -
Looking for advice here.
Is it wise to use nginx instead of Apache if running php (in regards to the LAMP stack)? And can php be kept strictly in the backend? I've never used php before and now I get the chance (yippie) so I want to hear what you guys have to say. Previously I've used node. And also, can frontend libraries like react or vue be used alongside php or is it just going to turn into a smorgasbord of nonsense.
Thank you for any advice :)5 -
every fucking time when the product owners start talking absolute shit that you have no idea and you would never need to know or listen to.
ITS A WASTE OF MY FUCKING TIME. SHUT THE FUCK UP AND TAKE IT OFFLINE. -
Colleague: Can you help me with something when you're not busy?
Me: TypeError: cannot concatenate 'not' and 'busy' as <status>!
I guess it doesn't help that I do my work in a non-dev environment...
On the plus side, it's very hard to be bored as a developer :)
*sigh* -
"We would really prefer it if you didn't attempt to print time zone offset with your DateTime values (because that functionality is utterly borked and prints nonsense)."
From documentation of .Net DateTime.
-
I'm literally and truly done with Vagrant machines built using puphpet.com (Docker has since replaced Vagrant for me).
I just tried to spin up a project from about a year ago. The machine fails to work, spitting out loads of unhelpful Ruby related nonsense.
After an hour of buggering around and because I really need to get this update done I decided to try my luck and get scotchbox a go.
Within 10 minutes I had a working Vagrant machine and the said site up and running.
To me puphpet.com is like a single use Vagrant machine. It will work once but don;t expect me to work in a few weeks.
Machine built using puphpet.com can go to hell. So much time wasted.2 -
The software eng. pendulum will swing away from scrum/agile nonsense after years of those things contributing mostly inferior half baked beta software to customers. Unfortunately, it will swing too far the other way but will somehow also manage to claim roots in the musings of Demming and Japanese auto manufacturing when Leave it to Beaver was still a hot TV hit. In other words, the org charts will have different titles, and different buzz words will be used, but developers will still have archetypal pointy haired bosses.
-
I have two identical machine configurations. Somehow one of the two is so badly fucked up by EFI boot that it still won't boot from anything other than the SSD or EFI. Even a bios reset won't fix it.
How do I even go about resetting EFI? I just need the thing to boot from the damn disk. (it's workstation grade mobo, has vPro and that other nonsense, I think it's a Q87 chipset)8 -
Magical Realism is defined as what happens when a highly detailed, realistic setting is invaded by something too strange to believe.16
-
If you've ever had to do hiring (technical side) of new software developer\s, the seniority in terms of working years is the most valuable criteria for you or the hiring department, or there's else?
On my side I'm a software developer from around 1 year and here (in Italy) your price is, from what I've seen, based on the seniority in terms of time, rarely actual skills\adaptability.
I'm good as a full stack developer and I'm proficient in adapting\learning to-new\new skills about new languages and Frameworks.
Soon I'm leaving my underpaying job with good output from my work\projects, but I'm faced with this seniority nonsense that makes most of the recruiters silent because the new price is similar of someone with high seniority, and I'm kinda tired of this, so I'm here to hear your thoughts about this. -
How hard is to build the app store to stop all this nonsense ? I know ios is locked but at least we can stop google1
-
When a manager / "architect" starts saying complete nonsense about how some technology works, because he read a bit about it on the internet, but you prefer to just let him talk than proving him wrong. Not worth my time...1
-
So I have been migrating my website from AngularJS to Vue as an experiment. I'm late to the party.
It has a navicon that opens a dock, a bar that drops down when you scroll, and some insane particle effect that is first drawn to a canvas and then pushed into a div's background image in real time. Seems nesting Vue instances isn't an option, so I made it into a component.
After two days I finally got it working... and it spazzes the hell out. It's literally the exact same code, but now the canvas starts to flicker like crazy the moment you scroll the page.
Not only have I been doing really filthy stuff like 'var self = this', I have no idea where even to begin debugging this nonsense.4 -
Most fun I've had coding was writing a Slack bot for the team. All of it utter nonsense, but fun to do2
-
Was chilling with my team and remembering some very funny code issues (wasn't at the time) we inherited in a product... when we took control of the servers they were dead...
Code somewhat abbreviated... see why a few 100 of these could do that :)
public class Util
{
... lots of nonsense here...
public static DbConnection GetConnection()
{
conn = factory.CreateConnection();
conn.ConnectionString = this.connectionString;
conn.Open();
return conn;
}
}
try {
Util.GetConnection().DoThingsAndStuff();
}
finally {
Util.GetConnection().Close();
} -
Still new to development buy holy dang I had no idea clients could be so fickle.
It seems like every time I turn in my one project- which I've been on for a month because of this nonsense- they think of two more major features they wanted all along but never mentioned -
So... According to this chart devs should not listen to heavy metal and punk...
https://columnfivemedia.com/work-it...2
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