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Skillsjava python c#
Joined devRant on 11/28/2017
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I used to hate marketing.
But now, I realised how powerful of a tool it is.
Indians are dumb and wide majority are fucking illiterate out of choice.
Dumb morons. Add as much glamour as possible, and you will be able to sell these fuckers anything.
99% of the elders in my family are illiterate. Many of my cousins post fake success photos and market themselves in family group.
All the boomers think that the kids are doing well. No critical thinking. In reality, those cousins are struggling like crazy.
The boomers, including my retarded father, think that I am a useless piece of shit. According to them, I am a waste of oxygen.
Trust me, market well and you can make billions in Indian market.
#BuildForNextBillionUsers9 -
*CTO in panic, as always, invites everyone to the war room*
CTO: We have a MAJOR problem where 0.0001% of our customers are not receiving SMS confirmations.
Me: Cool. But, 0.0001% is very less compared to the other problems we are solving.
CTO: You don't understand, this is critical issue that needs to be addressed immediately.
Me: But even those.0.0001% customers are receiving e-mail confirmations, so this is not even blocker as we have other channels working.
CTO: I am emotional at this point. You need to prioritise this now.
Me: Okay, do we know the root cause of this problem?
Engineering head: we have blacklisted those numbers in past as our system detected them abusing our platform.
Me: Cool. Let's whitelist them, nothing much to worry here.
CTO: Floyd, you need to understand that 0.0001% of the customers are not receiving the SMS and the solution you are proposing is incorrect.
Me: Okay, what do you suggest?
CTO: We stop sending the SMS to all the customers.
Everyone on the call: 😨18 -
Do you ever meet peopao awesome that you literally have to stop and process it through..
Just met one such guy at my new workplace and as soon as he opened his mouth, I could sense that dude is fucking next level personality.4 -
boss: “I’m conceiving a new policy for engineering. What do you think about these changes?”
me: “Looks good”
boss: “You hardly looked at it”
me: *looks for one second longer than I did last time* “Looks good”
boss: “Do you actually care about this?”
me: “Am I going to have to enforce this policy or interact with any aspect of what happens when it becomes official?”
boss: “No”
me: “Honestlly, man….I really don’t”.
boss: :( “Ok”.
🤷♀️4 -
Entire fucking world:
Shift + Enter == New Line
Spreadsheets:
Alt + Enter == New Line
Spreadsheets are America of digital world.5 -
It's probably no news that I love Typescript's versatile and powerful generics. Today I found what is probably the most brilliant use of these tools to solve a real problem. This package exports one generic type which takes one generic argument, reads it like a JSON schema and returns the Typescript type for it:
https://github.com/YuJianrong/...7 -
Indian Product Management community is the shittiest community for any professional domain.
Everyone is just focused on being a guru preaching shit to others when they themselves no nothing about the function or possess any significant skill(s) to perform at their job.
A bunch of bozos, themselves struggling to stay afloat, are saving others. Fucking hilarious.
What makes this worse is that the entire community is so inclined towards "cracking the interview" and landing a job.
Instead what they should be focusing on is teaching them younglings what the role is and how to develop the right skill set. More importantly why the role exist in the first place.
That way, they will automatically land a good gig and solve critical user problems.
No wonder, most products these days are bloated with garbage and PMs are only focused on engagement, retention, and more fancy buzzwords which make absolutely no sense.8 -
Roger Waters is a true fucking rebel.
Absolutely love this man and how he rejected Zuckerberg's offer to advertise on Facebook.
Fucking legend.
https://youtu.be/-TGBcAZ55D4
I cannot feel more pride of being a Floyd fan. The ideology is what keeps me going.1 -
I feel guilty for using YouTube Vanced and being unable to support content creators.
Shouldn't there be a feature that allows you to toggle ads on certain channels you want to support?
I really want to support such folks who are creating valuable educational content but Google being the biggest piece of corporate shit, makes me angry when it comes to compensating the creators fairly when they make Billions off their hard work.
The world is a better place because of such teachers who spend time, energy, and efforts to create valuable and useful content for rest of the world.
Funnily, back in days when we had awesome stuff, the tech was shit to document all of it. Now when we have advanced and easily accessible tech, we have shitty TikToks.
Why can't the creators of good content get more visibility and why is the world so fucked?16 -
I've legit just spent the past few days CRYING to get my react native app to compile on iOs using the xcodebuild command so that I can use a cloud build service (VS App Center). It works fine with XCode 'play' button but not through the command line. About to give up. Literally Googled 'fuck xcode' and found this, thank you guys, you made today a bit less dreary than what i was going to be. Reading through the posts actually made me laugh out loud.3
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# PROD
* 10 app instances running
* 1 instance starts burning up 100% cpu
* we ask for a Thread Dump (stack traces)
* we get a TD taken after they manually restarted the instance
* they: "Please investigate. We need this fixed ASAP"
* .....
EVERY FUCKING TIME!!! Not once in recent years have they managed to take a TD correctly. What kind of a retarded monkey do you have to be for this to not sink in for YEARS!
Who tf put those idiot monkeys there in the first place...8 -
When I was in 7th grade, my neighbor (a DoD programmer) challenged me to write a sorting algorithm for a hypothetical super limited environment (he said a satellite). It didn’t have any built-in sorting methods, had very limited memory, slow processor, etc. so I needed to be clever about it.
It took me a few nights before i found a solution he liked. The method I came up with counted the number of occurrences of each number in the array and put them in the appropriate spots in a new array. This way it only required O(2n) running time and 2n memory.
I just learned today that this is called the “counting sort” 😄
I’m proud of little 11 year old me.20 -
A while back, I had a lot of telemarketers were calling me daily, and I mean A LOT of them.
I got so frustrated with he calls that I decided I had to figure out a better way to handle those calls.
At the time, I was working with a PBX software called Asterisk, which is used to handle hardware interfaces and network applications for phone calls.
I needed a suitable side project and there was a version of Asterisk designed for Raspberry Pi, so I made a fun little answering service for myself.
Whenever a telemarketer called, I asked them to call back later, but to "my personal number", and gave them the number to my phone robot. (which had a pre-paid SIM card in a GSM dongle mounted)
When it received a call, it would play a pre-recorded phrase, wait for 1000 ms of silence and then play the next phrase.
After all 16 phrases had been played, it would start from phrase 7 again and repeat until the caller gave up.
I had this set up running for a while, and then added another robot for english speaking callers.
The calls stopped after a few months.
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!13 -
Slowly working it up now, actually.
An annually updated, unbiased, multiple source application that engineers can use to check salary offers vs their skills, to make sure they don't get shortchanged. Intended to work for the entire planet (that we have data for).18 -
Customer: "Our people keep clicking the save button and it saves things and now we have lots of things."
Me: "Should we remove their option to save?"
Customer: "Oh no we want them to be able to save."
https://youtube.com/watch/...
Prepare for business rules hell where our protagonist has to account for other human's lack of self-control by applying business logic produced by middle managers who have no idea what anyone who works for a living actually does.3 -
Github actions are so complicated, why they don't set up something like a simulator. I keep pushing my updates everytime I make changes to my yml file only to know it errors.1
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How I went from loving my job to wishing i dont wake up tomorrow just to avoid it.
Ive been a backend dev in the company im at for 2 years now.
First year was a blast, i loved my work so much, I used to get so many random features to do, bug fixes, campaigns, analytics, etc..
Second year i started getting familiar with the part of the code that has to do with Search in our music streaming app. Nobody wanted to work on it, so i wanted to take initiative and start doing a few tasks.
A few tasks turned into sprints, and sprints turned into months worth of sprints. And because the code was the definition of tech debt, and because it was so messed up that changing one thing can blow up everything else, working on Search was not too fun.
However, people seemed to be happy search tasks are no longer piling up and someone is handling them so that used to make me feel good about it. They also gave me so much freedom and i felt like my own manager because no one told me what to do (not even my actual manager) they just let me be and were happy i was handling the part they want nothing to do with. I was also given an intern to mentor and have her work on Search tasks with me which turned out amazing.
During the last few months, I completely rewrote search, made it 10 times more performant in such a neat way, made an inhouse dashboard to automate certain tasks so we wont need to waste developers on them (all of which were extra effort on my own time without being asked), all meanwhile still tending to the fixes of the old implementation.
I felt so accomplished, and in a way, i felt like a lead (even tho im not managing any employees, i had so much freedom and I was literally responsible for everything about Search and if i decide to play with the sprint task order i can even do that).
Then 6 or so weeks ago my manager left the company, and while i thought id be a standalone team / person (single person teams are not uncommon in the company) i was instead put under someone else. Someone who likes to micro manage the fuck out of me. I have been happy working on shit code because it was my baby, my project, no one interferes and no one tells me what to do and everyone would call me the search lead (unofficially). now if i dont report to that guy every two hours he calls to see if im working. preplans sprints i no longer have a say in, and im the only dev who knows the code so all tasks go to me. I feel i got demoted so fucking much. I felt like a lead on a project and now im back to being a normal code minion. From deciding everything about a project to blindly following a some irrelevant manager's opinion. (who btw is making Search worse) And after all the extra effort i put in, after actually caring, after actually embracing Search as my responsibility i get rewarded with losing everything i liked about my job...My Independence. From feeling like a lead to feeling demoted. I am so demotivated.
I love the company, but this is hell for me and this made me hate a job i always loved. I am thinking of talking to the CTO asking to work on other stuff because i no longer want this. If i am to be a code minion at least let it be on code i like, let me go back to dealing with PMs, fuck my new manager I dont wanna work with that guy he can take the project along with all its poopoo.16 -
Hello world again, long time no rant.
Renewed interest in devRant after some of recent goings on:.
“Let’s define a new language”
“Why? There are lots of great languages out there”
“It will be domain specific and more user friendly”
“Why, there are plenty of other options with support and pedigree”
“We will properly define a grammar in Backus-Naur form, it’ll be great, maybe we can sub it out”
“Why, literally everything we do is already doable with the current tools, this will certainly be more trouble than it’s worth”
“They already gave us the money”
All aboard! Fun times ahead for the next decade...8 -
Our Service Oriented Architecture team is writing very next-level things, such as JSON services that pass data like this:
<JSON>
<Data>
...
</Data>
</JSON>23 -
November brings .Net 5, for anyone who cares about that, and after listening to my husband watch Ignite "reveal" advertising container, and all the enterprise virtue signaling therein, I am now to the point where the only thing I can think is "Fuck you Microsoft, and Fuck .Net 5."
During a 30 minute speech, the director of the dotnet platform commits the following flagrant faux pas:
1. Introduces tons of visual studio easy buttons for shit we already do, no mention of VS code support.
2. Shows tools that anyone other than the most insular enterprise mouth-breather have been using for no less than 6 years
3. Gives absolutely no credit to the Open Source community projects backing the features he's showing
4. Shows nothing but mono-cloud integration, makes no mention of any other cloud targets for new features
5. Acts like "deploy your app the cloud from IDE" is something anyone should be doing in 2020
6. Showed an API repl that is pathetic compared to httpie when it was in alpha
7. Showed blazor loading from cache and said "Look at how instantaneous it is" (if you ignore the 5mb of cached payload it took to run the hello world demo)
8. Shows Project Tye, presenting it as a new groundbreaking xyz, fails to mention helm already exists
What's absent is what is most offensive:
- acknowledgment of community contribution
- no linux/mac tools, entirely windows-centric (which jives with my prediction of second-class citizenship for the people who contributed to .net core the most)
- cross-cloud capabilities
- bash/zsh (again with the untermensch relegation)
Fucking microsoft back to their old bullshit.24 -
Thinking of auto adding ‘you dumb fuck’ to every email I send to a client. Fucking useless time wasting bastards.
Example: I’ve forgotten my password for the cms can you send me a link to reset it.
The login page has a link clearly labelled ‘forgot password?’.
I send a screen grab with a big red circle around the link and some polite text, which I was desperate to add ‘you dumb fuck’2 -
Conversation between my husband and myself.
H: I ordered a game for the switch last week. It was delayed by USPS, and it looks like I got a partial refund due to it being late.
Moi: That's your mail privilege at work.
H: Did you really just make a mail pun? *Snerk*
Moi: This is why we work. ♥️5