My girlfriend clearly doesn’t understand our struggles

Some software developers deserve to drown in a pool of Rosie O'Donnell's used enema water 😡

Am I a pixel to you?

Optimising code

Machine Learning

savage

A wordpress theme developer playing with core wordpress code.

Bumped into my crush twice today,
nothing could have boosted my productivity more.

Talked with my boss about documentation for projects in markdown instead of (shiver) MS Word. My boss laughed after I explained what mark down was and said that she did not want a world where we had to edit text files all day.

Wait? What do you think programming is?!?

Also Word is basically a text file with tons of proprietary bloated junk on top. Any “feature” it has is not needed.

Mood:
- Currently coughing my lungs out, I'm not working tomorrow to keep my colleagues safe
- Cat is purring on my shoulder
- Listening to some dope ass synthwave
- Updating the JetBrains IDEs so that I can work on something to busy my mind
- It's 3:45 AM.

But I don't want to add an alias email. Fuck you Microsoft.

The United Nations should make a law or pass a resolution to ensure better coding standards. :)

I committed a terrible sin. I didn't have time for my portfolio site, so I used...

WordPress 😫

Identified the origin of the DDoS attack. Apparently, the person was just hopping through 3 IPs so looked like a targeted attack likely from a competitor. I sent the logs with incident notification to the abuse@hostprovider.com to ask them to suspend them.

Got a prompt response but took them a week to suspend this.

We were a very small team and had to stop everything to fix this-iptables and firewall etc.

We had not even launched the product and was still under development.

CEO - So... We'll have a new side project, it's a small thing, I spoke with a guy, he needs just a small thing...
Me - Ok....... So, what do you need me for?
CEO - Not much, this guy started a project but wants your help on a small part, and you already did something similar for us, so it should be fast, just copy and paste and change a little bit. You probably know better than me.
Me - *Sigh* ... So `friend`, what do you need from me?
Friend - So, I made a crawler that is storing some information on a local file, I just need to add multiprocessing and multithreading, a producer-consumer system with a queue so I can automatically add new links every now and then, a failback system, so when a process doesn't finish, it should be re-queued and crawled later, store all the information on a database cluster (that is not set up), [......]
Me - And when is this supposed to be up and running?
Friend - Your CEO told me you could do this by the weekend. Can we finish this by Friday?
Me - *facepalm* FML

HELLO MONDAY!

I love my job. ❤️

I applied for Software Devloper position but was called in for interview for Systems Analyst (IT). Nothing to do with coding. When I mentioned that I applied for Software Developer role, I was told that there is no vacancy for that role then why the fuck did you advertised and fuck the fuck did I apply.

Fuck

Git Pull Failed, Merge Conflict.

Me:
don't do it
don't do it
don't do it
don't do it
don't do it
don't do it
don't do it

Me:
Delete local project folder and pull the project down again.

Tried getting enough sleep for the Monday and failed miserably.
First, I made my kids washed, like usual, around 6pm. Then tried to put them to sleep. The younger one went to sleep, the older refused. Wanted to play, run, jump, sing and scream. After an half an hour his screaming woke up younger. Now I had two kids to put to sleep back again.
The younger is one year old and requires more attention, otherwise cries.
After serious fight the older was forced to sleep. He tried to jump over me, bite me, kick, hit, eat chocolate, wanted to pee, then jump, run and fight again. I ended up lying him forcibly in the bed, holding his hand by kind of a block, so that he couldn't move to much. Took 15 minutes, but he felt asleep. It was 22. Joys of having 3yo kid.
After more 30 minutes and a bottle of milk the 1yo was sleeping.
At 2am the older woke and cried. I woke, tried to make him calm, he pushed me away and went back to sleep. Now it's 3:40, my sleeping pill wore off, and I won't take another one, because I need to get up at six.

This is how you get a good night's sleep before having a busy week.

Not Again ! :/

- Think first, write later;
- Do not rush into purchasing servers. You might not need them for another 10 months;
- It takes away a lot of family time to do side projects;
- NOT playing any games saves tremendous amounts of time. Also applies to watching TV;
- If you get stuck - get some sleep. Morning brings you better ideas;
- Write proper abstractions or you'll end up refactoring everything way more often that you'd like;
- Side projects need a loo-ooooot of your will and determination

START FUCKING USING GIT.

😅

I've been looking at the shittiest code today. Hundreds of lines saying

this.thing.otherThing.EvenAnotherThing[this.someFuckingIndexThatShouldntBeAField].theOnlyBitThatsDifferentPerLine.AlsoNoneOfTheNamesWereThisMeaningful

Over and over. They're all wider than the editor window. Clearly copy pasted. Just make a fucking variable Jesus Christ how do you expect anyone to read that

new rule in company

No headphones while coding

job hunting start......

What is it about clients that provokes them to ask about the same feature every day? No, it’s not fucking done yet, I don’t have a team of devs under me who work overtime to finish it overnight. It’s not going to get done any faster if you keep fucking bothering me about it.

The creation of an e-ink usb stick showing how much space is in use was to this day one of the best things lexar ever did.

Every time I have to deal with my boss code and lack of convention and everything that makes a clean code I just want to scream like a bitch and punch him in the face without minding breaking my own hand.

6 char

Divide by zero

New job...
No introduction to project
No database overview
No documentation
No commented code

Shit, hope this isn't normal in the industry I have aimed the rest of my life at