Hmm
Testing in prod? People never cease to amaze me.

Sorry if I make a typo, my hands a still a little shaky, just had to stop myself from crying.

This morning I came in, opened my email, saw an automated response from Jira saying .... saying ..... saying the backend team provided details about their new endpoint.

After a year of screaming, they finally did it. It was so beautiful I fell to the floor and wept like a baby.

Thank you all for your support through this difficult time. Together we can accomplish anything!!!

I hate interviews that asks me to write code on paper.

;____;

Satisfying commit.

Perfect meme

How I feel when I ask a question on StackOverflow...

OMG I have no clue why they're leaving
- Every asshole manager ever

Aaaaaaa 😂😂😂 quit vim

The creation of an e-ink usb stick showing how much space is in use was to this day one of the best things lexar ever did.

▓▓▓▓▓▓▓

This is how you'd imagine a sysadmin.

(Stolen from Reddit)

Oh poor Libre😂

Ping: 0ms

Our team just got the best email from our client hahaha

My avatar has some catching up to do

I need to make a confession. I wrote shell scripts that will automatically turn on my system and will download games and movies for me after office hours, using office internet

True Story?

My girlfriend knows what a coder needs when it’s their birthday. Lucky to have her. Walked into my room and it was set up like this.

Removing bugs in code be like

Some empty-headed helpdesk girl skipped into our office yesterday afternoon, despite the big scary warning signs glued to the door.

"Hey, when I log in on my phone, the menu is looking weird"

"Uh... look at my beard"

"What"

"Just look at this beard!"

"Uh.... OK"

"Does this look like a perfectly groomed beard"

"Uh... it's pretty nice I guess"

"You don't have to lie"

She looks puzzled: "OK... maybe it could use a little trimming. Uh... a lot of trimming". "I still like it though" she adds, trying hard to be polite.

"I understand you just started working here. But the beard... the beard should make it clear. See the office opposite to this one?"

"Yeah"

"Perfectly groomed ginger beards. It's all stylish shawls and smiles and spinach smoothies. Those people are known as frontend developers, they care about pixels and menus. Now look at my beard. It is dark and wild, it has some gray stress hairs, and if you take a deep breath it smells like dust and cognac mixed with the tears caused by failed deploys. Nothing personal, but I don't give a fuck what a menu looks like on your phone."

She looked around, and noticed the other 2 tired looking guys with unshaven hobo chins. To her credit, she pointed at the woman in the corner: "What about her, she doesn't seem to have a beard"

Yulia, 1.9m long muscled database admin from Ukraine, lets out a heavy sigh. "I do not know you well enough yet to show you where I grow my unkempt graying hairs... . Now get lost divchyna."

Helpdesk girl leaves the scene.

Joanna, machine learning dev, walks in: "I saw a confused blonde lost in the hallway, did you give her the beard speech?"

"Yeah" -- couldn't hold back a giggle -- "haha now she'll come to you"

Joanna: "No I already took care of it"

"How?"

"She started about some stupid menu, so I just told her to smell my cup". Joanna, functional alcoholic, is holding her 4pm Irish coffee. "I think this living up to our stereotype tactic is working, because the girl laughed and nodded like she understood, and ran off to the design department"

Me: "I do miss shaving though"

ON MONDAY

TL: Why the hell you require a month to integrate this engine?

Me: It will take that much time, can't help it.

TL: it can be done within a week.

Me: Then you do it.

TL: Ok I will show how it's done in a week.

ON FRIDAY

Me: What's the status on that integration?

TL: Oh yeah about that, you have to carry it ahead, I have some monitoring to do.

Me: Ok, give me the repository access, I will carry it ahead.

ME OPENS REPOSITORY.

There's only a new controller file with nothing it.

...solution found!

This bus stole HTML 5 logo 😁😁😁

Literally.

excuse me what the fuck

Hmm... 🤔

Playing cards against downtime with my less tech savvy mates is awesome!

Cheers from Germany 🍻

BOSS: Are you sure you are testing in development?

DEVELOPER: Yeah, the changes are local