"Globals? What? I don't do no globals, maaaan"

aham, ok, what's that local dressedup as global there?

"but that's still a local, dude!"

gsus xrist! I'd cry if it wasn't endemic 🤦🏻

My SSD was broken
My Dev VM was in it

Thanks!

I’m running 1.5km every day for two weeks already. Anxiety still strikes sometimes. Depression is measurably better, but it was getting better months ago when I started taking fluvoxamine, so I can’t attribute this to running alone.

Running will help me in another way though: my mental health will definitely be going through the roof when I look in the mirror and see the beautiful, albeit scarred, slender body I posessed before it all started.

Was playing fallout 4 a couple days ago. About 20 minutes in. The computer just shuts off. Like no power at all. I start up the computer again. Try fallout 4 again. It shuts off at the beginning video. WTF... I try Skyrim wondering if video card is busted. Skyrim runs perfectly fine. I startup Fallout 4 again. It runs. WTF...

Next day I try fallout and bout 20 minutes in power off again. Now I am assuming cooling issue and I am trying to see temps with programs. Cannot really tell.

So today I take apart my laptop and vacuum every cooling orifice out. Vacuum any dust looking crap I can see. There was dust in the fans. All clean. I run a memory test for a couple hours. Memory passes (it was brand new memory, thought maybe flaw in ram). Now I run fallout 4. Runs fine, zero issues for about an hour.

Me to myself: CLEAN YOUR DAMN COMPUTER MORE OFTEN! Okay...

In between I read about Fallout 4 causing system reboots and shutdowns due to loading and heating. Apparently something about Fallout 4 causes this more than other games. Wild... Pretty sure it was thermal shutdown protection going on.

How my day went.

Project Manager: We need deliverable X.

Me: That's not listed.

PM: But we need it. Other PM says what you provided isn't enough.

Me: Too bad. I was not told to deliver it.

PM2: We need deliverable X.

Me: Look at the requirements. It is not there. I'm not providing it.

PM2: We need it. Let me ask PM3.

PM3: We need deliverable X.

Me: No. It's not listed. And here's why it's not even applicable.

PM3: Oh....ok

Fuck, I just love hummus

Could eat this whole pot 🤤🍯

Hey. Can you add excel97 vba capabilities to new office 365 ? I have a 20years old xls file with very complicated macros that i need to run.
And btw, how come a software looses capabilities over time.

There is an easter egg in chrome devtools behind a colorful icon.

I just want to say fuck you to whoever wrote that message

hey guys have you heard of sTate aCtoRs?!?! tHeRe iS a BaCkDoOr BeCaUsE I aM a BaD coDe mAiNtAnEr aNd ApProVe aLL coMmiTs

i'm one of 10,000 ultra-rich fuckwads who lives in the sAnFraNsiScO bAy aReA

its crazy that people earn less than 300K per month!

but i spit around the word "state actor" because i once wrote a for loop that retrieves customer emails from a CSV!

hacker news dumb fucks, all of them

they need to go eat more salad at the meta headquarters

no wonder their jobs are at risk 😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡😂🤡

"this environment is externally managed"

yes, i know it is, please fucking install it

fuck you python and fuck you docker

tools for children

🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

ideal sprint fallacy.
total days 10 , total hours(excluding breaks ) 8 hrs per day= 80 hrs per dev

code freeze day = day 8, testing+ fixing days : 8,9,10. release day : day 10
so ideal dev time = 7days/56 hr
meetings= - 1hr per day => 49 hrs per dev

- 1 day for planning i.e d1 . so dev time left . 6 days 42 hrs.
-----------
all good planning. now here comes the messups

1. last release took some time. so planning could not happen on d1. all devs are waiting. . devtime = 5 days 35 hrs.

2. during planning:
mgr: hey devx what's the status on task 1?
d: i integrated mock apis. if server has made the apis, i will test them .
mgr : server says the apis are done. whats your guestimate for the task completion?
d : max 1-2 hrs?
m : cool. i assign you 4 hrs for this. now what about task 2?
d : task told to me is done and working . however sub mgr mentioned that a new screen will be added. so that will take time
m : no we probably won't be taking the screen. what's your giestimate?
d : a few more testing on existing features. maybe 1-2 hrs ?
m: cool
another 4 hrs for u. what about task 3?
d : <same story>
m : cool. another 4 hrs for u. so a total of 12 hrs out of 35 hrs? you must be relaxed this sprint.
d : yeah i guess.
m cool.
-------
timelines.
d1: wasted i previous sprint
d2 : sprint planning
d3 : 3+ hrs of meetings, apis for task 1 weren't available sub manager randomly decided that yes we can add another screen but didn't discussed. updates on all 3 tasks : no change in status
d4 : same story. dev apis starts failing so testing comes to halt.
d5 : apis for task1 available . task 3 got additional improvement points from mgr out of random. some prod issue happens which takes 4+ hrs. update on tasks : some more work done on task 3, task 1 and 2 remains same.
d6 : task1 apis are different from mocks. additionally 2 apis start breaking and its come to know thatgrs did not explain the task properly. finally after another 3+ hrs of discussion , we come to some conclusions and resolutions
d7 : prod issue again comes. 4+ hrs goes into it . task 2 and 3 are discussed for new screen additiona that can easily take 2+ days to be created . we agree tot ake 1 and drop 2nd task's changes i finish task 2 new screens in 6 hrs , hoping that finally everything will be fine.

d8 : prod issue again comes, and changes are requested in task 2 and 3

day 9 build finally goes to tester
day 10 first few bugs come with approval for some tasks
day 11(day 1 of new sprint) final build with fixes is shared. new bugs (unrelated to tasks. basically new features disguised as bugs) are raised . we reject and release the build.

day 2 sprint planning
mgr : hey dev x, u had only 12 hrs of work in your plate. why did the build got delayed?

🥲🫡

I do and will always pirate, unless it’s low-budget indie and I can support the creator directly

Postman is a horrible third party hacking tool. It’s use should be outlawed.

What a time sink.

My $18 eBay find has Blockbuster app on it.

cheers to the cultured ones here

What good is this notification if it can only be clickbait worthy 🤦

!rant

“Are you drinking my soda?”
“Statute of limitations!”
“Did you know in some countries there’s a statute of limitations on murder?”
“And?”
“And that means sometimes it can run out.”
“And?”
“And that means you can’t be tried for the crime.”
“Are you threatening me?”
“What? No. Why?”
*gestures at soda* “You literally told me that after I took your soda.”
“Oh! Shit. You mentioned statute of limitations, _that_ was the connection, it wasn’t a response to you stealing my soda.”
“You looked me right in the eye and told me that some countries have a statute of limitations on murder.”
“I looked you in the eye because we were having a conversation!”

I've officially entered my 30s.
I ate food the wrong way and my entire left torso hurts.

Yeah .... this is how it starts isn't it

Client: "When can you deliver this feature, so we can move on?"

Me: "Well, by the end of the week could be feasible."

Client: "Perfect!"

Me at the end of the week: "It is finished."

Client: "Thanks!"
Client proceeds to not use the feature for over 3 months.

every project leader's project is the most important!!!!!!!! not the others!!!!

fullstackclown! do this now!!!!!!

it's apes trying to impress apes, all the way down

Saying "Java is the best programming language because it works across all platforms" is the same as saying "Butt sex is the best form of sex because it works across all of the animal kingdom"

Yay, our 2FA of our accounts for the stores are linked to the phone number of the CTO who has left the company

It’s not “why do we exist“, it’s “how do we meaningfully exist for as long as we can”.

excel be like

My production build has a bug that the debug build doesn't. A bug that makes no sense, while all unsafe code in the program is on dead paths, and my recent changes should only affect niche multithreaded scenarios but the bug appears in the single threaded case.

I will never not laugh at this

XCode: I can't find your class in scope
Me: But it's right there. You could find it yesterday
XCode: Yeah, no.
Me: Look, if I cmd-click on it, you open the class. So you know what it is. It is in scope. It has to be.
XCode: Nope.
Me: *cleans build folder* *build* How about now?
XCode: Nope.
Me: *deletes derived data* *build* Now?
XCode: Nope.
Me: *buries head in hands* *swears* *Copies the text in the class file, deletes the file, recreates it with a slightly different file name, copies the text back in* *build*
XCode: Build complete.

For fucks sakes.

Why do people can't take 5 seconds to do a null check in 99% of the cases ?

"Oh I just assume it cannot be null"

Right, still take fucking 5 seconds to check it.

So tired looking at logs and seeing thousands of "nullpointerexception".

You can literally use it wuith "?" propagation

"But I defined in my coe that variable is never null using c# nullability!"

yeah moron, it makes compilator happy. It does not garanty that your variable will be not null. It wiull throw exception !

Damn.... If I die, my hell will be full of null pionters.

just a reminder

if you think your 500 line python script with garbage hardcode values everywhere that brittly functions even for you is going to bring you thousands in subscriptions

fuck you

WhatsApp and Telegram should consider a feature to disable voice messages from all contacts or all contacts but close friends.

I'm getting tired of getting tech support requests from acquaintances I haven't hung out with in years but when these are too lazy even to type and I have to take type and listen to their muttered voice notes I get crazy