How programmers comment their code

It's never a good sign when a team lead writes code like this

Power shortages plus 3D printers don't mix... FUCK, 2 hours of work.
Next upgrade: UPS.

"warranty void if seal is broken"
Me: "seal isn't broken"

Client: Can I speak to the developer responsible for my website?
Developer: Speaking...
Client: You have a deep voice for a 5 year old.

Skype has a mean auto reply. If the auto reply is based on a neural net, then they must be sampling from bullies.

Dude! We have toilets on each floor. Why do you push shit on git?

Just got Dark theme for windows. Damn it is nice 😊

After years of game dev!

When an api returns 'pong' to 'ping' 😍😍😍

Yah.....!!

Taken from Quora

Got stuck on a project for a whole day. Just got out of bed, start my computer, got a cup of coffee and in 5 minutes I found the problem.

Just amazing what a well rested body can do.

How they think like this😜😂😜

Well, I mean, it’s a no-frills explanation at least...

The time when we were not aware with advance features of IDE and version control.
(3-4 days before the project demo)

Me: This code was working fine last time. Now it is not compiling. Has anyone did some changes?

Team member: I corrected some spellings. So that our teachers don't correct us at the time of demo.

Me: (shocked, expression less ) We demo the application not the code. And you have not corrected on all the places.

Team member: You should do the rest.

(Based on true story)

Me: *Watching a movie*

Main Character: "Oh no, we have to hack the CIA to figure out how this machine works! Hacker girl, do the stuff"

Hacker Girl: "Consider it done!"

Hacker Girl: *Opens Linux bash*

Hacker Girl: *types 'mkdir Hack_CIA'

Hacker Girl: "They have two-factor authentication in place, this is going to be a hard one."

Hacker Girl: *Types 'cd Hack_CIA'*

Hacker Girl: "I'm in!"

Me: "..."

Friend: "Wow, so well done, so realistic!"

Me: *Dies*

I will just leave it here 🙂

This is Soo true!!

rant && dev && education

So I just interviewed this guy for admission into our bootcamp and because he has raised some red flags before, I asked him to just write a factorial function and he chose HTML to do it. I told him he can certainly try thinking that maybe he doesn't know that whatever you write inside script tag is actually JavaScript. He went on to do this. What bothers me is he have a computer science diploma.

Till now I have just heard of these people but always taught those are just marketing or some person who think that just because they here HTML with some other programming language. BUT THIS IS SOME NEXT LEVEL SHIT.

My sister lending me her credit card to buy something online.

S: "But don't store the number!"
me: "I would never."
S: "I know you can hack it, please don't!!"
me: "Haha okay.."
*cries inside... just because I make websites and 3D design*
me: "Thanks a lot, sis <3"

version control...

And the beauty is done

Food arrives, boss grabs his food.

Boss: ahhhh finally! *looks lovingly at food* you won't hear me for the next 15 minutes 😍 *starts eating*
Me: well that was about fucking time.
Boss: 😐😶
Other engineers: 😂 *trying to keep food in*

Simpsons

Training till last breath...

Hugs and kisses❌
Bugs and fixes✔️

Quora be like

Thank you, Chrome, for telling me that it is unsafe to proceed to localhost. I was unaware that I was trying to steal my own information

"It's just money"

Our CTO, the first time I broke something on production.