My coworker said she'd rather commit seppuku than use Edge.

My first thought was "commit it to what?"

I forgot commit had another meaning ...

Just spoke with another teams developer. (She's using Java)

Her: so we get a json object from your service, I want an array
Me: well that's not what you said in the specs... And it's not hard since it's just a Map
Her: what Map? It's JSonObject I need an Array
Me: give me the library your using..
Her: here...

I Google the documentation and methods and paste the link and the methods to use:

-length (she also wanted count)
-toJsonArray

This ain't JS, just use the . operator and go thru all the methods' docs... Or learn to use Google

"Delete node_modules folder and execute npm install" is the js version for "reboot the machine". Often works, but no one knows exactly why.

Interview went well until i asked my questions about them.

"Are pet-projects a thing in your company"
... no.

"Can i attend programming gigs in a workweek, and are they paid by the company"
... no, no

"Any restrictions on the IDE"
... yes we only allow visual studio
"Wait, frontend web development in vs?"
... yes

"Do you develop in other languages then JavaScript"
... only Java

I calmly stood up, told them "I dont think that the company and I are a good fit. Thanks for your time."

Got a phone interview for a backend dev job in an opsec company.

Interviewer:
This is a very serious and prestigious position, we take care of the most important bits of code.

*Proceeds to talk introductory nonsense*

Interviewer:
Do you know what a DNS is?

Me:
Yes, of course! DNS stands for Domain Name System.... Blah blah blah... I explain about the servers, about hosts file, about DNS spoofing and everything else possible on this topic.

Interviewer:
See, I was patient with you - letting you finish. I'm not sure what you're talking about and where you got it from, but a DNS is that line in the browser where you type the site's name.

He didn't ask any more questions, just told me that they'll get back to me. I asked not to do that.

Three weeks later I got an email claiming that I'm not qualified.

My most successful project? The next one.

If that doesn't happen, read this again.

A collaborative writing platform [more details]

A pretty open source desktop e-mail client finally! [more details]

Typescript❤

If you name your methods a, b, c, x, z, etc

Then I hate you.

If the idiot wants me to help then use proper method names!

4 all the JavaScript haterslovers:
Check out typescript.

I fell in love with it months ago.
😍

Started learning Go

It's very interesting language

This community really motivates me to master my skills and learn new stuff to become a great dev. Thank you!

We had robotics, or rather an electronics workshop today. Just imagine throwing a bunch of nerds into a room with 3d printers, lots of electronic parts and other tools.

Anyway one of my friends said that his computer wasn't working.

Me: It's running windows so it's broken by default.

Him: common, windows isn't that bad

Me: it is

Our teacher walking by: I'd never want to use windows, it's basically malware

I just sat there smiling 😊

I hate when people don't capitalize ID in all caps. It is confusing when the write it as Id or id, because I don't know if they're talking about an identifier or the aspect of human nature that exists from birth that subconsciously drives you to want to fuck your mother.

I've been working towards a degree in CS recently after being out of school nearly 10 years. I've been trying really hard to keep an open mind and not complain about the professors, but I have to let this out.

My one class we have to write all of our code in their specified editor which I hate, but I understand the need for standardization, but then once it is error free we have to copy and paste the code into ms word and turn it in!! Really?! In 2018 I can't just submit my source files and you open them to run and grade? I seriously have to copy my code into ms word for you to grade it? I don't even understand how you would grade that because it kills the formatting and readability, not to mention the quotes get changed to their curly counterpart which isn't valid syntax.

If you can't save yourself anymore...

When you work on a web design by a graphic designer, expect to see 12px used for article paragraphs and 9px for navs... And of course, decimal pixels and asymmetric layouts that don't fit in any grid systems... On top of that, layers and layers and clipping masks and all the weird stuff in Illustrator...

Happiness is :

$ git pull
Auto-merging foo.bar
Merge made by the 'recursive' strategy.
$ _

A HUGE FUCK YOU TO EVERY GODDAMN ONLINE STORE WHO NEEDS A CREDIT CARD NUMBER TO OBTAIN SOMETHING FREE.

(the following is a big fuck you)
______
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| |_
| _|
| |
\_|

_ _
| | | |
| | | |
| | | |
| |_| |
\___/

_____
/ __ \
| / \/
| |
| \__/\
\____/

_ __
| | / /
| |/ /
| \
| |\ \
\_| \_/

__ __
\ \ / /
\ V /
\ /
| |
\_/

_____
| _ |
| | | |
| | | |
\ \_/ /
\___/

_ _
| | | |
| | | |
| | | |
| |_| |
\___/

Some time ago I went for a job interview (Unity3D Dev). I have little experience in this field and never thought that I would get this job but wanted to gain some and thought that it would be a great opportunity.
So after the interview, which was great and I really enjoyed it, I've been tasked with making a simple minigame. Only requirements were that there have to be player controls, character must avoid obstacles and camera must be moving with player's progress. I've made a little spin on those. In 2d minigame I've created you are piloting simple (made out of 3d primitives) rocket. You have to avoid randomly spawned platforms. If you hit one, you explode. You also die, if you hit a wall or fall out of camera and hit Destroyer. Camera is constantly moving as long as you are moving. The spin is that you have very limited fuel. To regain it you have to land on said platforms with your thrusters. It took me around 12h to make this game. The only reason I know it is because they wanted this info. I've learned a bit while working on this minigame and had a lot of fun. It was a great impuls to start learning gamedev again and stop stagnation I fell in when I started my studies and work.
Today I've got response. Obviously I didn't get the job. They took more experienced person and I totally understand that. But there's more. They were so great to give me pretty extensive review of what was done good, what could be done better and how to gather more experience. They said that the game met their expectations and was written well. That's great, because I was worried that it would be bad since I haven't worked on graphics at all.
So, at least I got an impulse to start learning and maybe I'll even go for some game jam!

Ranting time;

Yeah so OK this ancient legacy clusterfuck we've been maintaining and keeping alive finally broke. And even though I'm very pleased with both being right, and the well deserved right to say I TOLD YOU SO, SO MANY MANY FUCKING TIMES to all in management, it's the definition of hate to work 18 hours a day to fix the shit someone else built, that they refused us to refactor. Ah, but wait; there's more! Everyone thinks it's our fault (R&D), because historically it was our department that built the system. Ten years ago. So sales and support are now all over us, those responsible for us being in this mess are either gone or so high up in management that they refuse to take part.

Taking the fall and blame and workload, for something we warned repeatedly about, but were refused to do something with, because shiny features and new apps is what is important!

I'd understand it if the numbers were red, but they arent!! We are growing so fast it was inevitable!

I fucking hate companies who dont listen to their devs..... also companies who places ops on dev shoulders.

Yaaaargh! Also; two developers means twice as fast? No? Fuuuuuck!!!

Me brute forcing into the appartment (where i rent my room) modem:

*tries all most easy/logical combinations*

Nope.

*tries more difficult ones*

Nope.

*hmm.... no please not both just blank....... 😷*

Admin access granted.

😩

Drove 1.5 hrs for a interview at a company which was developing mgmt software for fire departments. They were very pleased with me, as i am with a volunteer FD and a perfect fit in their opinion. I declined after i found out they code base is mostly VB6 and they considered source control unnecessary.
Thanks, but no thanks.