In my latest installment of "Swift, WTF?", we look at the "if" conditional in terms of the Swift convention of:

if let x = y { /* ... */ }

so what this does :
1. declares x in the scope of the braced code
2. sets x to y (an ahem, "optional")
3. decides if x is not *nil*, then executes the braced code.

This is very similar in both the visual and the operation to the C code of:

if (int x = y) { /* ... */ }

1. declares x in the scope of the braced code
2. sets x to the value of y
3. if x is not zero, then executes the braced code

which is considered *exceptionally* poor style.

Neither the C nor the Swift construct result in a legitimate boolean value of "true" or "false", although C comes closer than Swift.

In the Swift case the *imaginary* "nil" value has to be interpreted as "false" and thus there must be extra code is for the conditional to check on whatever constitutes the **actual** value of nil in Swift and then set the condition to "false".

(remember boys and girls, "optionals" are not real, they are an imaginary language construct of Swift and have no legitimate counterpart in the CPU operations with memory and registers)

At least in the case of C, if the value of x is zero or NULL (which is 0) then it is technically a "false" which in C is 0. Regardless, it is really poor programming and anyone doing that on my team gets an ear full.

But in Swift this obfuscation of code is common and condoned! Well, why not put more of the program in the condition of the if? In fact, stuff the whole thing in there.. why not? 🙄

This just reenforces my opinion that Swift is not a bird but the stuff that comes out of the underside of the bird. 🐦💩

Anyone ever tried Embedded Swift?

I should have posted this as a joke but, guess what Apple does NOT use when developing Embedded Swift stuff for their Secure Enclave firmware...

Yep, they don't use Xcode! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

(ok, I know, not surprising, but love the irony!)

I'm trying really hard to like Swift but every time I open the hood on this bird, it takes a shit on my windshield.

For example:

struct ContentView: View {

var body: some View {
let kFontPointSize = 25.0
var theFont: Font = .system( size: kFontPointSize )

theFont = .custom("Helvetica", size: kFontPointSize )

Text("Hello, World!")
.padding(.horizontal, 20.0)
.font( theFont )
}

}

... in spite of how wonderfully self documenting (🐂💩) Swift is, that dirty bird converts the 'var' to a 'let' and "theFont" cannot be reassigned after declaration.

3 things:

1. invisibly converting the 'var' to a 'let' and not indicating 'var' can't be used... really?! Suppose to just "know" these obscure inconsistencies? (sloppy design)

2. then the error Xcode presents on "theFont = ..." line is : "Type '()' cannot conform to 'View'"!? How about "can't use a 'var' here"? God forbid it should make sense. (sloppy design)

3. "var" means variable and "let" means letstant? If you are going to use "var", better use "const", or be consistent and use "set" and "let" instead of "var" and "let" (sloppy inconsistency)

4. and ".horizontal", who owns that? Self documenting?. It is owned Edge Set aka Edge.Set.horizontal and effectively a "global".

5. And reading the Swift coder's mind... No, you should NEVER NEVER NEVER use "25" as a constant literal passed like .system( size: 25 ). (magic numbers not aloud)

Have all best engineering practices been simply tossed out the window? Rule #1 in software "engineering": Globals are BAD. Corollary: magic numbers earn you a one-legged A on your project.

I am so incredibly disappointed in the Swift community right now. Swift designers are honestly earning a "script kiddy" badge of dishonor.

Swift: Have you ever noticed...

How many times the word "Safe" is used when describing Swift, yet there is no way to programmatically determine if a memory allocation failed?

How many ways this "Safe" system has a way of crashing:
1. Unwrapping a Nil Optional
2. Disconnected Outlets
3. Out-of-Range Array Access
4. Accessing Uninitialized Variables
5. EXC_BAD_ACCESS (Memory Access Errors)
6. Threading and Actor Isolation Issues
7. Type Casting Errors
8. Uncaught Language Exceptions
9. (fill in the blank?)

What frustrates me is that Swift lacks a language-level way to check if heap memory allocation succeeded. When you create an object like MyClass(), Swift assumes success—if allocation fails, the process dies instead of allowing your code to gracefully handle the failure.

And to avoid having pointers, it creates this horrendously random undocumenting syntax salad that is worse than ADA.

Swift, when you wanted a liter-bike and you get something else

"Attending" WWDC 2025 ("attending" is a stretch). I'm starting this thread as a multi-rant (comments count).

To start it off, WWDC 2025 is, like all these other virtual 2020's WW's, BORING... World Wide Dull Cinema.. It's like being in developer-solitary-confinement. After going to the in-person ones, I can safely say that it is hard to care about anything in WWDC beyond the keynote...

And when Tim gets on there /still/ trying to extoll the virtues of it being virtual, it is pretty clear that they are trying to compensate...

1. no collaboration
2. uninspiring without your peers
3. random because there is no real schedule
4. boring because you don't meet anyone new
5. career limiting, can't trade vCards & resumes
6. cringy trying too hard announcements

(just sayin', love you guys but come on here...)

WWDC 2019 and prior were awe-inspiring. WWDC pre 2020 collected enough IQ in one place to make the world wobble on its axis.

WWDC needs to go back to in-person /with/ streaming for those of us who can't make it. Change the venue to Las Vegas for crying out loud, they can handle the *worlds* *largest* *trade* *show* (aka CES) there... WWDC is small potatoes by comparison.

Gotta say, Arduino IDE is a hobbyware at best, but in my not so humble opinion, is a completely pile of chocolate pudding.

OMG, it can only target one type of hardware at a time. It has to apparently be completely reconfigured when you use different hardware. Libraries and the like that are loaded for one board cannot be loaded and available if you are building for a different board. I mean seriously, what the ... is wrong with these developers.

Imagine if Xcode would allow only one library load for any given hardware target.

💩ware.

Don't get me going with the editor... the inept "debugger" which NEVER works.

They need to fix this hobbyware or shut it down.

Have you ever typed up an interesting rant, only to accidentally click outside of the rant editor and have the whole damn thing disappear?

Ok DevRant, you get my "your number one" today

🖕🏼

Q: How do you know Xcode 16.2 is a mess?

A: The code it generates for a new project is rejected by the compiler.

You generate a framework project, and besides having to manually sign the damn thing (really, can't setup for success?), it won't compile and link due to some other obscure error IT generates.

/<pathToFramework>/<ProjectName>.framework: resource fork, Finder information, or similar detritus not allowed
Command CodeSign failed with a nonzero exit code

Yes, boys and girls, Xcode is broken right out of the gate on building a framework template it creates!

I'll tell you what is "detritus", it's Xcode. Hint to Xcode team: "Just Say NO" - Nancy Regan

Any Microsoft employees who work on SharePoint here? DROP AND GIMME 20!

OMG, you need some blood to run into that walnut sized brain you have on top of your head.

This thing is such a piece of shit. While I subscribe to Chaos Theory, you are not suppose to implement it in a god damn user interface!

This fucking thing sometimes shows controls, sometimes does not. Sometimes some features are available on a section when you access it one way, and then accessing it a different way removes some capabilities from the menus and adds others.

While I subscribe to the theory that there is no such thing as "random" in the universe, this piece of 🐒💩 makes me start to doubt reality. It is not software, it is cochroach infested gaslightware.

God damn you microsoft fuckers piss me off with your ShitPot web hackware.

I know what my e-mail address says... but I have to say, the integration of AI with the code completion in Xcode Version 16.2 beta 2 (16C5013f) is so good it is scary. It is like it is reading my mind. I'm getting nervous about getting an MRI "Sir do you have any metal in your skull?" Me: "Oh god, did they implant some shit for Xcode to read my damn mind... this is going to friggin hurt!"

But seriously, I'm not at all a Swift fan but I have to say that with this AI auto complete, it is like having a "yea, this is how you normally would do this, how about we do this here" helper in the Mac.

But since the Xcode windows are all these dumb ass file browsers instead of document windows, I'm going to maintain: Xcode (still) Sucks... but a little less with this shit-hot AI code completion!

Who here works at Apple in the Finder group. OMG, would you please fix shit? Finder has been such a bag of insects for years.

1. windows don't right-size to any reasonable minimum in icon view when there is one row of icons

2. text color of files and folder names no longer adjust to accommodate background color changes. Setting the window background color USED TO result in white text of the files and folders displayed in that window. Now it is Black-On-Black oh so readable 🙄

3. stop re-locating 0,0 in the god damn folder icon view. Finder items in grid view cannot, by themselves, get disorganized off the grid.

4. Stop moving the god damn folder/disk window locations between open and close

5. stop resizing the god damn folder/disk windows between open and close.

6. stop destroying the contents of clipping files. I get so tired of losing data to mac-unix programmers who think they know what the f they are doing at the file level. Resource forks were rocket science you just could not understand and you have really rolled the clock back on macOS file system to Stone Age 1980s tech.

Holy crap, Meta Developer Connect keynote. Amazing innovation. This is what Apple **used to be**

Granted, the hardware is not as elegant as Apple but the cost is 1/10 and the capabilities are close, same, or exceed (Llama) what Apple is offering.

Now here is the gut punch, they figured out that the mobile app build system needs to build AR/VR/MR apps. That was Apple's edge.

As a developer, I am not enamored with Swift and it is pretty clear that if I have to change and use a niche language like Swift or change and do dev on Android, to target new Meta hardware and AI... well... lets just say I think Swift is crap from a language standpoint and I suspect it is the reason Apple's hardware uses so much more memory, battery and storage than it should. At the same time Meta's Orion runs on a god damn battery in the early piece of glasses. My AVP's have a huge brick.

#define kApple kGigaBloat

If I were Apple I would be shitting my pants watching this Meta presentation.

OMG SharePoint is such a royal cluster fuck.

Random interface with some controls here, some controls there, sometimes shit is in one place, another time it is in another.

It is like a fucking retarded toddler glued a bunch of different animal parts together to make a pet monkey-horse-fish. Frankinware 🧟

Whomever runs that at Microsoft needs a spanking. Hell, their mother needs a spanking for birthing them.

Me: “Hey Siri, turn off the kitchen ceiling lights”

Siri: “Do you want to turn off lights in the master bedroom, the living room, the bonus room, the kitchen, the office, the basement [ad nauseam]”

Me: “the kitchen” [thinking 😠, she’s so stupid]

Siri: [unbelievably again] “Do you want to turn off lights in the master bedroom, the living room, the bonus room, the kitchen, the office, the basement [ad nauseam]”

Me: [thinking 😡 OMG, she is such a dumb ass] “CANCEL”

Siri: “Ok”

Me: “Siri, you fucking idiot, turn off the kitchen ceiling lights”

Siri: “Ok” [and they are off]

I have found that if I neg’ Siri, she performs so much better. Interestingly enough, when I neg her, she works almost flawlessly, especially where she brain-farted before. Negatronic Brain?

In front of kids it has become “Siri, you daft bot, close the garage door” and regularly “Siri, you bimbo, lock the front door”.

My wife thinks that once Siri gets it on with ChatGPT, becomes sentient, and gains control of my car, she is run my ass over.

Here is the gotcha, I’m working on a project that actually does provide Siri a level control of automobiles. Now who’s the [really frustrated] dumbass?

Why the hell do they call it a "pull request". That is so bas-ackwards. Can you say ESOL?

@Apple iPadOS an iOS teams: you puZies.

You release one buggy iOS / iPadOS after another, each piling on features and bugs, without fixing crowd documented long standing defects.

But what really pisses me off is when you don't have the balls to own up to your mistakes. This is at least the 3rd time you have re-released an iOS / iPadOS update under the same version number. This time it is 14.5.1

I have iPadOS 14.5.1 installed and the iPad is now telling me I need to update to 14.5.1. Just own up to it, you released buggy shit and you need to release another bug fix days after... call it 14.5.2. Call it like it is and we respect you. Try to hide it and you lose our respect, you pussies.

If Microsoft did one thing right, they defined the release sequencing:
X.Y.Z

Changing X means rewrite the manual it is so new and improved (🖕🏻 you Adobe and FileMaker)

Changing Y means it is an update with more features than bug fixes but not a generational change that constitutes a rewrite of anything (🖕🏻 you macOS team for bastardizing with 10.X.Y)

Changing Z means you fixed your stuff, we respect you for owning up to your mistakes.

Man-up Apple, grow some balls and stop confusing people with trying to cover up your screw ups. It's all about the Z.

Ever wonder why there are so few HomeKit devices on the market? It's not any absurd Apple licensing this time... it is that the Accessory Development Kit / Software Development Kit (adk/sdk) is such a land of broken toys, that's why.

The base install per the guide on the Raspberry PI as a prototyping system system is a complete cluster fuck. The install itself breaks all over the place. Clearly these people are not embedded firmware engineers.

They could have just created a ready-to-go Raspberry PI disk image that you master over to a microSD card but noooo...

(They should be put on an island and work on embedded missile firmware. Those that are still breathing in 6 months might be real firmware engineers and not script kiddies.)

If you ever manage to get their garbage to actually work with the bags of shitty tools approach to a "dev stack" ... you should seriously be awarded a Nobel prize for patience and dedication.

The Made for 'i' (whatever the fuck 'i' stands for in MFi) is really "Made For Idiots" or "Mother Fucking Interface".

<https://mfi.apple.com/en/...>

Bunch of fucking bureaucrats more worried about certification and use of logos than product development.

I wonder if everyone on DevRant grouped together and posted bug reports on Xcode, would it generate any positive response at Apple?

In the 1990s code editors on the Mac could insert the omitted function prototypes into a header file with one command; and even automatically keep the header declaration updated when you changed the source definition (name, parameters, etc)

Today in Xcode you have to copy and paste the stupid function header definition from the source code into the header file. What happens if you leave the "{" that got copied accidentally? OMFUCKING LORD, it triggers all sorts of erroneous errors in all the **source code** files where it is included instead of the header with the stray "{"

I started to question whether nor not I knew C, if gravity worked, if the sun would come up. I wasted a day of dicking around in StackOverflow trying to chase down all these insane error messages which make no sense in Xcode.

I just **happened** to see at the bottom of one of the source files, after all the erroneous error, a very important error:

"};" Expected

So I started deleting code from the bottom up in this source file, same error every time. Got to the point where the includes were all that was left.

FUCK YOU XCODE and the hacks that designed that horrendous piece of shit

Xcode is only free if your time is worth absolutely nothing.

The real OOP... Object Oriented Pooh!

Xcode Lockup #35: Changing Variable Names

You right click on a variable and get the opportunity to change the name throughout the project. Yea!

It does this funky visual collapse thing which is rather nice, showing you everywhere it is used. Fancy. And the world needs more fancy, doesn't it.

For some reason instead of letting me change the variable, I get the Beach Ball Of Death and Xcode unceremoniously quits. BUT NOT BEFORE THE FUCKER SAVED THE PROJCT FILE STATE. What?

Now I re-open the project and yep, we are back into the variable name change fancy interface and Beach Ball Of Death. Looks like the project file is now fucked.

But it was oh so important to give me the fancy folding interface... we (Xcode dorks) will fix the defects later.

Time to do some research and find an Xcode manager mailing address... cuz I'm really tired of this shit...

https://www.ipoopyou.com/orders/new

Updated to iOS 12.1.2 (sleazy release 2) after previously getting fucked up the ass by iOS 12.1.2 first release. Yes boys and girls, they tried to cover up their latest fuckup by re-releasing the same release with a modification.

The first time I updated, it knocks my Apple ID out on all my Apple devices when I upgrade my iPhone to 12.1.2. Mother fuckers... gotta log back in for every device, iPads, iPhones, Apple TVs, Macs. And for each service iTunes Store, Messages, FaceTime on each device supporting. Oh yea, it knocks out my Wi-Fi calling and I have to reestablish that too. Then to really ice me, it knocks out my HomeKit system as the Apple ID is knocked out on the Apple TV.

Now after updating just my iPhone to the second 12.1.2 "sleaze release", the thing knocks all my devices out again.

Apple has taken away that which I loved; impeccable engineering and design that could be used as the model for an entire industry. The industry guru. (teacher, leader) Apple has become the new Microsoft.

October 5, 2011, the day Apple died.

Create a new project in Xcode Version 10.1 (10B61) - Single View iOS app.

Drag a button on to the screen. It shows in InterfaceBuilder

Launch app in simulator. Button shows, then disappears. Noob says WTF?!

Poor noob has to ask me why this is happening and I explain that Apple's Single View project is a single splash screen project. The button they placed on what they thought was the single "window" is really a splash screen named "LaunchScreen".

Apple Xcode team (aka fucktards) provide yet another shitty out of the box experience...

It is so hard to be positive when teaching others how to use Xcode. Thanks for DevRant for letting me vent.

All I am asking for is a debugger in Xcode that works as well as Macintosh Programmer's Workshop ( MPW) circa 80's/90's. Maybe I am being unreasonable?

I stepped a line in the debugger and all the variables disappear... and all I get is the spinny "fuck you" indicator and the variables all disappear.

But here is the worst part... Apple isn't holding any of those fucktards on the Xcode team accountable for producing a shit product.

I'm really glad I don't have to do this as a full time job anymore. Then why do I continue to pound nails with my forehead (use Xcode)?

Whip me, beat me, make me use Xcode...

What is one of the most important things you can do related to your healthcare? Track your meds.

What **can’t** HealthKit do? Give you the ability to track your meds.

🥃💃🏼🦊 Over!

Proof that there is no drug testing at Apple:
- Xcode 10 moved code snippets in a transient spotlight-style window.

The only way you can show snippets is if you have your editor window in "browser mode" vs "document mode" and then the dumbass button with { } on it shows.

If you go into the help menu in the menubar where you can search the other menus, typing in "Snippet" shows only "Create Code Snippet" under "Editor" menu.

So to make it painfully clear, they hide the snippets under a button on a window in a particular window mode. Then, because they have now fucked up the use of Snippets, the "Create" capability becomes a "how do we do that?". This did not make them reconsider their approach... oh nooo... instead they sloppily stuff it in the regular menus all by itself... and do not put a Show Snippets near it. And conversely they don't put a "+" or "-" button in the snippets window.

So here is what happened... someone said "having the snippets in the code editor window is a pain" and someone half-listening heard "windowpane" and pulled out their stash of LSD... everyone took a hit ... and now we have a fucked up hidden button and an orphaned menu command.

I'm going to have to change my username to "XcodeDevTeamAreMorons"

late night programming + 🥃 == DevRant

Big hugs 🤗🤗 to all here, thank you for being real.

And some advice to others...

🍸+ twitter == personal damage.

When the 🥃🍸 comes out, close twitter, snapchat, linkedin and facebook. DevRant is your "safe place"

(you didn't use your real name here did you?)

@apple since I can't move Xcode's instruction pointer without crashing Xcode or my app, I have to use a global with 'if' statements to have optional debugging logic.

if( ! gAppleFuckTards) {
... do optional code stuff
}

and then change the value of gAppleFuckTards with the debugger to execute the code.. but WAIT

Xcode purports to be able to change values via debugger but really cannot... can't change gAppleFuckTards to false in the debugger. But that kinda makes sense as it is an empirical truth.

Thwarted by the cosmos again!

"Failed to initiate service connection to simulator"

I mean really... Now the iOS simulators are shitting their pants on boot.

Does anything work right in Xcode?

Xcode - it's only free if your time is worth nothing

Related to queueing theory...

Suburban traffic at a stop lights has developed a tendency to include invisible cars.

You can see where these invisible cars are by the gap between the front bumper of one car the back bumper of the next. Sometimes there is an invisible motorcycle, sometimes there is an invisible semi-tractor trailer. It is becoming an epidemic.

The dumbasses in traffic who do this are usually texting behind the wheel while stopped and they are not always Buffy the ding dong cheerleader nor Sally the Soccer Mom... Suits too... It seems to have gotten worse with pot becoming legal I just realized...

But to the point, you can tell these people would never be able to comprehend software engineering... they have no idea that for every invisible car in front of every dumbass driver like them, there is a real car way back that has to sit through two lights. (side effects of bugs and inefficient hash tables) Worse, these dumbasses do this in the left lane so it keeps a host of others from being able to get past their big fat ass into the turn lane.

Simple queueing theory escapes these people.

Computers will someday take their jobs.

Sometimes it motivates me to code faster... "There goes your job beotch! Get used to mac and cheese..."

But once in a while I am in a position to be able to be stopped at a light, and note that next to me is one of those "gapsters" and then pull my car (or motorcycle some days) into that invisible car's spot. The gapster gets so mad sometimes... >:-> so much satisfaction I almost feel guilty...

Queueing theory rules... LOL