So my school got invited to this coding competition for high-schoolers and among them, I was a part member and part mentor along side our CS professor since I was the most proficient coding stuff (although most of I do were JS and Python stuff although i can read other code)

Then this guy showed up.

He was picked by the faculty to take the WebDev competition. He knows how to use Photoshop for Photo retouchings and stuff but here's a problem.

He can't code nor make a proper website design.

So being the kind person I am, I volunteered to teach him what I know about frontend and HTML. This goes on for 4 weeks of nonstop practices, coding sessions and finally, Code In The Dark-style practice (which involves the person to code a full website for only 15 minutes).

When he was able to finish and mastered some of what I taught. I gave him the go signal and we were on to the road to victory.

Unfortunately our first try, we won nothing.

He said after the competition "I give up man, I can't take this!" but I said, "Just because you lost a f*cking competition once, doesn't mean you're a motherf*cking loser in life. There's still one more chance."

So I pressured our WebDev guy to be more better, taught him about mockups, JavaScript and etc.

Then the second attempt a year later, me and the WebDev guy won and moved on the finals. However, he didn't win the finals and I was the lone champion reprsenting our school.

Although he didn't win, he was happy I carried the torch and win the prize.

Prior to that, he asked me "Hey, how to be like you?"

I only answered, "Achievements are just gold with cloth and paper. Wear it lightly".

Fast forward to today, he's now the school's head design coordinator and layout designer for their newspaper column. He also practices his coding skills by frequenting on our coding sessions even when the competition was over.

But whenever someone asks "who taught you this?" he would only look to me, smile and say "that person right there".

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Assembler Chicken: First, it builds the road ......

C Chicken: It crosses the road without looking both ways.

C++ Chicken: The chicken wouldn't have to cross the road, you' d simply refer to him on the other side.

COBOL Chicken: 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING.
IF NO-MORE-VEHICLES
THEN PERFORM 0010-CROSS-THE-ROAD
VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1 UNTIL
ON-THE-OTHER-SIDE
ELSE
GO TO 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING

Cray Chicken: Crosses faster than any other chicken, but if you don't dip it in liquid nitrogen first, it arrives on the other side frazzled.

Delphi Chicken: The chicken is dragged across the road and dropped on the other side.

Gopher Chicken: Tried to run but got beaten by the Web chicken.

Intel Pentium Chicken: The chicken crossed 4.9999978 times.

Iomega Chicken: The chicken should have ' backed up' before crossing.

Java Chicken: If your road needs to be crossed by a chicken, then the server will download one to the other side. (Of course, those are chicklets.) See also WMI Monitor.

Linux Chicken: Don't you *dare* try to cross the road the same way we do!

Mac Chicken: No reasonable chicken owner would want a chicken to cross the road, so there's no way to tell it how to cross the road.

Newton Chicken: Can't cluck, can't fly, and can't lay eggs, but you can carry it across the road in your pocket.

OOP Chicken: It doesn't need to cross the road, it just sends a message.

OS/2 Chicken: It crossed the road in style years ago, but it was so quiet that nobody noticed.

Microsoft's Chicken: It's already on both sides of the road. What's more its just bought the road.

Windows 95 Chicken: You see different coloured feathers while it crosses, but when you cook it still tastes like........ chicken.

Quantum Logic Chicken: The chicken is distributed probabilistically on all sides of the road until you observe it on the side of your choice.

VB Chicken: USHighways! <TheRoad.cross> (aChicken)

XP Chicken Jumps out onto the road, turns right, and just keeps on running.

The Longhorn Chicken had an identity crisis and is now calling itself Vista.

The Vista Chicken dazzled itself with its own graphics.

Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the side of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a halt. The driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist-watch, and a Versace tie, gets out and asks the Shepherd:

Man: “If I can tell you how many sheep you have, will you give me one of them?”

The shepherd looks at the young man, and then looks at the large flock of grazing sheep and replies:

Shepherd: “Okay.”

The young man parks the car, connects his laptop to the mobile-fax, enters a NASA Webster, scans the ground using his GPS, opens a database and 60 Excel tables filled with logarithms and pivot tables, then prints out a 150 page report on his high-tech mini-printer. He turns to the shepherd and says,

Man: “You have exactly 1,586 sheep here.”

The shepherd cheers,

Shepherd: “That’s correct, you can have your sheep.”

The young man makes his pick and puts it in the back of his Porsche. The shepherd looks at him and asks,

Shepherd: “If I guess your profession, will you return my animal to me?”

The young man answers;

Man: “Yes, why not?”

Shepherd: "You are an IT consultant."

Man: “How did you know?”

Shepherd: “Very simple. First, you came here without being called. Second, you charged me a fee to tell me something I already knew, and third, you don’t understand anything about my business…Now can I have my DOG back?"

6pm - arrive home from work, log into my computer and start working on side projects.

4am - Finally go to sleep after staying up all night setting up arch in a vm.

7am - Start drive to work in the snow and ice.

7:20am - car runs out of wiper fluid.

7:30am - round corner so that I’m driving towards the sun, windshield is covered in mud and I have 2% visibility.

7:35am - take off ramp towards gas station so I can buy fluid and wash window.

7:36am - Car mysteriously parked in center of off ramp, nearly smash it but have a narrow miss.

7:40am - can’t find the freaking pully in new car to pop hood

7:41am - found it.

7:50am - drove the back way to work because it cuts out traffic, but includes many steep hills that I forgot existed, come to a skid at bottom of one and am pushed out into the main road, luckily nobody is coming and I’m able to continue on my merry way.

8:01am - sit down in desk, lead staff person comes over evoking Lumbergh from Office Space and lets me know I need to be on time to work and that the snow doesn’t give me an excuse. I agree and smile and suck up and he leaves.

8:02am - pull out phone to write down notes about personal project that I thought of on drive here, phone dies. I forgot to plug it in last night.

8:04am - found power bank charger thing in desk but it uses a micro-b type usb and I only have usb type c on me.

8:10am - borrow usb from old headset in office surplus.

8:11am - writing notes. Have sudden realization that I didn’t shut down my vm and that when my computer went to sleep and subsequently locked it probably halted virtualbox and everything would be lost for the second time.

8:12am - got on devRant.

Height of work pressure:

⚠ I was flashing my ID card instead of unlocking the house door with the keys.

⚠Me and my friends went out for dinner in one of the best restaurants and as I finished, I started walking towards the wash basin with plates in my hand.

⚠I don't login to facebook, youtube, etc.. at my personal internet connection at home... thinking it will be blocked anyway. Till I realized that, I was at home.

⚠Once after talking to one of my friends I ended the conversation saying, "Ok bye... in case of any issues will call you back"

⚠Once I went to a pharmacy and asked for a tab. Pharmacist asked whether I want 250mg or 500mg? I replied 256mb. Thank god he didn't notice.

⚠After a hectic week, went to a movie. In the middle of the movie, when I wanted to check the time, I kept repeatedly glancing at the bottom right corner of the Theatre Screen.

😄So avoid working so hard !😄

Have a great work-life balance.

Lastly...

⚠Extreme Work Pressure:
An employee opens his lunch box on the road side to see, whether he is going to office, or coming back from office.😂😂..

Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the side of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a halt. The driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist-watch, and a Pierre Cardin tie, gets out and asks the shepherd: "If I can tell you how many sheep you have, will you give me one of them?"

The shepherd looks at the young man, and then looks at the large flock of grazing sheep and replies: "Okay."

The young man parks the car, connects his laptop to the mobile-fax, enters a NASA Webster, scans the ground using his GPS, opens a database and 60 Excel tables filled with logarithms and pivot tables, then prints out a 150 page report on his high-tech mini-printer. He turns to the shepherd and says, "You have exactly 1,586 sheep here."

The shepherd cheers, "That's correct, you can have your sheep." The young man makes his pick and puts it in the back of his Porsche. The shepherd looks at him and asks: "If I guess your profession, will you return my animal to me?"

The young man answers, "Yes, why not?" The shepherd says, "You are an IT consultant."
"How did you know?" asks the young man.
"Very simple," answers the shepherd. "First, you came here without being called. Second, you charged me a fee to tell me something I already knew, and third, you don't understand anything about my business... Now can I have my dog back?"

S: Do you want to hear a UDP joke?
C: Yes I would like to hear a UDP joke.
S: ...
S: ...
C: ...?...?...?
S: Well I don't care if you get it!

User: "Hello, I'd like to hear a torrent joke".
Tracker: "I will refer you to people who can tell you a torrent joke"
Peer1: "Why d"
Peer2: "cken "
Peer3: "road?"
Peer4: "id th"
Peer3: "cross"
Peer1: "e chi"
Peer5: " the"

Peer2: "the o"
Peer4: "To ge"
Peer1: "side."
Peer5: "ther"
Peer2: "t to"

Hello devRant, it's been a while. For anyone who has been following my... situation, here's a little update.

I moved back home to Kansas City, Missouri. Staying with parents for now.

I had to leave my daughter in Los Angeles, which was hard for me... but i can't provide for her living in my car.

I also got divorce papers in the mail from my wife. And I have a lot of court battles coming up to get custody of my daughter so she can live here with me. It's a long road ahead.

On the plus side, my parents took me camping and we kayaked the Little Niangua river! I hadn't gone camping or floating in at least 10 years. It was very relaxing.

At any rate fellas, enjoy and appreciate the good times and the people in your life. You never know when it'll all go to hell.

A few of Stux's !dev pet peeves

1) People that walk slow as fuck in the middle of a side walk. Like hurry uppppp. I've gotta get 0.5 miles in like 8 minutes and you blocking the walkway doesn't help.

2) People that don't understand how side walks work. Treat it like the fucking road. ⬇️⬆️ Is the pattern in which you should walk. It's not rocket science.

3) People that start walking up the bus steps as I'm clearly walking forward to get off. Ffs let me off and THEN get on you stupid bitch

4) people that bike or ride their skateboard/longboard around campus but are moving slower than I am while walking. If you're gonna do that hop the fuck off and carry the damn thing.

5) people that don't try to solve an issue with their code on their own BEFORE they call the professor over. (There goes the !dev lol)

6) people that act like their favorite musician or athelete or actor or anyone fucking famous they play kiss ass with can't be criticized. Just bc they're famous and/or good at what they do sure asf doesn't make them perfection and I retain the right to voice my opinion.

My name is Stuxnet and you're watching Disney Channel.

A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer, and a programmer are riding in a car.

The car breaks down and coasts to the side of the road.

"Hang on," says the mechanical engineer. "The problem is probably the engine, let me have a look at it and I'll have us on the road again in no time."

"Wait," says the electrical engineer. "The way it just stopped like that, I think it's the electrical system. Let me have a look and I'll get us going again in a minute or two."

"Hold on," says the computer engineer. "Why don't we all just get out of the car and get in again, and then see if it starts?"

Alternate punchlines:

"Why don't we open and close all the windows, and then see if it starts?"

"Why don't we remove parts from the engine until it starts successfully?"

A memorial for my favorite rant of all time "Why did the chicken cross the road?"

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Assembler Chicken: First, it builds the road ......

C Chicken: It crosses the road without looking both ways.

C++ Chicken: The chicken wouldn't have to cross the road, you' d simply refer to him on the other side.

COBOL Chicken: 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING.
IF NO-MORE-VEHICLES
THEN PERFORM 0010-CROSS-THE-ROAD
VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1 UNTIL
ON-THE-OTHER-SIDE
ELSE
GO TO 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING

Cray Chicken: Crosses faster than any other chicken, but if you don't dip it in liquid nitrogen first, it arrives on the other side frazzled.

Delphi Chicken: The chicken is dragged across the road and dropped on the other side.

Gopher Chicken: Tried to run but got beaten by the Web chicken.

Intel Pentium Chicken: The chicken crossed 4.9999978 times.

Iomega Chicken: The chicken should have ' backed up' before crossing.

Java Chicken: If your road needs to be crossed by a chicken, then the server will download one to the other side. (Of course, those are chicklets.) See also WMI Monitor.

Linux Chicken: Don't you *dare* try to cross the road the same way we do!

Mac Chicken: No reasonable chicken owner would want a chicken to cross the road, so there's no way to tell it how to cross the road.

Newton Chicken: Can't cluck, can't fly, and can't lay eggs, but you can carry it across the road in your pocket.

OOP Chicken: It doesn't need to cross the road, it just sends a message.

OS/2 Chicken: It crossed the road in style years ago, but it was so quiet that nobody noticed.

Microsoft's Chicken: It's already on both sides of the road. What's more its just bought the road.

Windows 95 Chicken: You see different coloured feathers while it crosses, but when you cook it still tastes like........ chicken.

Quantum Logic Chicken: The chicken is distributed probabilistically on all sides of the road until you observe it on the side of your choice.

VB Chicken: USHighways! <TheRoad.cross> (aChicken)

XP Chicken Jumps out onto the road, turns right, and just keeps on running.

The Longhorn Chicken had an identity crisis and is now calling itself Vista.

The Vista Chicken dazzled itself with its own graphics.

A few days ago I went to my local bank again to check my balance and see whether some transfers that I've been waiting for have been completed.. as I was walking there - headphones on, music full blast - I was zoning out a bit. Of course I was, not like I have to mind cars in the middle of bumfuck here. There's hardly any in this town. So meh.

Now that day there was one.. I was just about to cross the road and suddenly looked left, and there it was. A mindless meatbag behind the wheel of a killing machine - an average driver. Visibly startled I suddenly stopped and waited for her to drive away. At this point she was about 20-ish meters away and already stopped. Come on bitch.. I already stopped and I am not going to cross this road as long as you're here. Hit the fucking pedal.

So she accelerated again.. and drove to the parking spot at the other side of the road, then stopped there. Oh, cool. Maybe she needs to be somewhere in this town. … Not at all. Bitch accelerates again, and stops yet again 2 parking spots further. What the fuck (ಠ_ಠ).. and I thought that I was an idiot...

Then she accelerates yet again and drives away. Looked after her, astonished by the amount of brain damage she just caused to me. Must've been a Facebook user.. holy fucking shit. Through what kind of black magic do these people get a driver's license?!

TL;DR :

"when i die i want my group project members to lower me into my grave so they can let me down one last time"

STORY TIME

Last year in College, I had two simultaneous projects. Both were semester long projects. One was for a database class an another was for a software engineering class.

As you can guess, the focus of the projects was very different. Databases we made some desktop networked chat application with a user login system and what not in Java. SE we made an app store with an approval system and admin panels and ratings and reviews and all that jazz in Meteor.js.

The DB project we had 4 total people and one of them was someone we'll call Frank. Frank was also in my SE project group. Frank disappeared for several weeks. Not in class, didn't contact us, and at one point the professors didn't know much either. As soon as we noticed it would be an issue, we talked to the professors. Just keeping them in the loop will save you a lot of trouble down the road. I'm assuming there was some medical or family emergency because the professors were very understanding with him once he started coming back to class and they had a chance to talk.

Lesson 1: If you have that guy that doesn't show up or communicate, don't be a jerk to them and communicate with your professor. Also, don't stop trying to contact the rogue partner. Maybe they'll come around sometime.

It sucked to lose 25% of our team for a project, but Frank appreciated that we didn't totally ignore him and throw him under the bus to the point that the last day of class he came up to me and said, "hey, open your book bag and bring it next to mine." He then threw a LARGE bottle of booze in there as a thank you.

Lesson 2: Treat humans as humans. Things go wrong and understanding that will get you a lot farther with people than trying to make them feel terrible about something that may have been out of their control.

Our DB project went really well. We got an A, we demoed, it worked, it was cool. The biggest problem is I was the only person that had taken a networking class so I ended up doing a large portion of the work. I wish I had taken other people's skills into account when we were deciding on a project. Especially because the only requirement was that it needed to have a minimum of 5 tables and we had to use some SQL language (aka, we couldn't use no-SQL).

The SE project had Frank and a music major who wanted to minor in CS (and then 3 other regular CS students aside from me). This assignment was make an app store using any technology you want. But, you had to use agile sprints. So we had weekly meetings with the "customer" (the TA), who would change requirements on us to keep us on our toes and tell us what they wanted done as a priority for the next meeting. Seriously, just like real life. It was so much fun trying to stay ahead of that.

So we met up and tried to decided what to use. One kid said Java because we all had it for school. The big issue is trying to make a Java web app is a pain in the ass. Seriously, there are so many better things to use. Other teams decided to use Django because they all wanted to learn Python. I suggested why not use something with a nice package system to minimize duplicating work that had already been done and tested by someone. Kid 1 didn't like that because he said in the real world you have to make your own software and not use packages. Little did he know that I had worked in SE for a few years already and knew damn well that every good project has code from somewhere else that has already solved a problem you're facing. We went with Java the first week. It failed miserably. Nobody could get the server set up on their computers. Using VCS with it required you to keep the repo outside of the where you wrote code and copy and paste changes in there. It was just a huge flop so everyone else voted to change.

Lesson 3: Be flexible. Be open to learning new things. Don't be afraid to try something new. It'll make you a better developer in the long run.

So we ended up using Meteor. Why? We all figured we could pick up javascript super easy.Two of us already knew it. And the real time thing would make for some cool effects when an app got a approved or a comment was made. We got to work and the one kid was still pissed. I just checked the repo and the only thing he committed was fixing the spelling of on word in the readme.

We sat down one day and worked for 4 straight hours. We finished the whole project in that time. While other teams were figuring out how to layout their homepage, we had a working user system and admin page and everything. Our TA was trying to throw us for loops by asking for crazy things and we still came through. We had tests that ran along side the application as you used it. It was friggin cool.

Lesson 4: If possible, pick the right tool for the job. Not the tool you know. Everything in CS has a purpose. If you use it for its purpose, you will save days off of a project.

So apparently I own land in dubai. Like three separate mortgages based on the email I received.

Your request (Mortgage Registration)
with request number xxxxx / 2024
has been completed
and you can print your issued certificate from this [link]

I've stripped out the numbers and link.
After confirming it was safe I followed through on a old spare cellphone, and yep, I own three mortgages for properties in dubai.

Except obviously I don't.
Someone used my name, an american, to register mortgages in dubai. *Nice* properties according to the pictures.

What started out as a scam email, or what looked like a scam email, went to an actual government of dubai website, with real mortgage registrations.

How in the fuck does that happen?

The only thing I can think of is someone committed identity fraud, and/or an alphabet agency went through the list of known political dissidents, set up a bullshit mortgage in a questionable territory, and are now using that as a pretext to monitor 'extremists with foreign ties.'

All that for some guy on the west coast that hasn't attended a political rally in his entire life.

Must have been that sign I held at sixteen years old by the side of the road that said "bush lied us into a war, and people died."

or maybe it was that time I told a really enthusiastic obama supporting police officer that it amazed me obama had time to win the nobel peace prize what with all the bombings he carried out against foreign civilians.

!rant, but whatever... At least it brightened my day.

So, I was walking to my school, when I saw a visibly "tired" guy (you know, a lot must've happened yesterday evening / night) walking on the other side of the road in the opposite direction. He crossed the street with the wobble of uncalibrated drone and at that point I knew what is going to happen. Or so I thought.

So we're walking towards each other. At one point he looks at me.
Me: *thinking* "Yep, he saw me. I'm going to be asked for money, am I not? Ugh, I have to think about excuse. Again..."
He: "dude..."
Me: *thinking* "Mmkey, here we go again"
He: "dude, don't do drugs... 'cuz they're bad"
And he walks away.

So, I guess today's lesson is you'll never know when you're going to get friendly advice from random people.

So, nowadays Developers also working on a road side 😂😂

!rant
User: "Hello, I'd like to hear a torrent joke."
Tracker: "I will refer you to people who can tell you a torrent joke."
Peer 1: "Why d"
Peer 2: "cken "
Peer 3: "road?"
Peer 4: "id th"
Peer 3: "cross"
Peer 1: "e chi"
Peer 5: " the "
Peer 2: "the o"
Peer 4: "To ge"
Peer 1: "side."
Peer 5: "ther"
Peer 2: "t to "

!dev

What the hell is wrong with bus drivers?! Our bus was just stopping, and the bus on the other side of the road couldn't care to wait 20 more seconds, so he drives away, fucking waving to our driver. What the hell man? Literally everyone coming with this bus takes it just to switch to your fucking bus you cunt!

Next week I'm starting a new job and I kinda wanted to give you guys an insight into my dev career over the last four years. Hopefully it can give some people some insight into how a career can grow unexpectedly.

While I was finishing up my studies (AI) I decided to talk to one of these recruiters and see what kind of jobs I could get as soon as I would be done. The recruiter immediately found this job with a Java consultancy company that also had a training aspect on the side (four hours of training a week).

In this job I learned a lot about many things. I learned about Spring framework, clean code, cloud deployment, build pipelines, Microservices, message brokers and lots more.

As this was a consultancy company, I was placed at different companies. During my time here I worked on two different projects.
The first was a Microservices project about road traffic data. The company was a mess, and I learned a lot about company politics. I think I never saw anything I built really released in my 16 months there.

I also had to drive 200km every day for this job, which just killed me. And after far too long I was finally moved to the second company, which was much closer.

The second company was a fintech startup funded by a bank. Everything was so much better than the traffic company. There was a very structured release schedule, with a pretty okay scrum implementation. Every team had their own development environment on aws which worked amazingly. I had a lot of fun at this job, with many cool colleagues. And all the smart people around me taught me even more about everything related to working in software engineering.

I quit my job at the consultancy company, and with that at the fintech place, because I got an opportunity I couldn't refuse. My brother was working for Jordan Belfort, the Wolf of Wallstreet, and he said they needed a developer to build a learning platform. So I packed my bags and flew to LA.

The office was just a villa on the beach, next to Jordan's house. The company was quite small and there were actually no real developers. There was a guy who claimed to be the cto of the company, but he actually only knew how to do WordPress and no one had named him cto, which was very interesting.
So I sat down with Jordan and we talked about the platform he wanted to build. I explained how the things he wanted would eventually not be able with WordPress and we needed to really start building software and become a software development company. He agreed and I was set to designing a first iteration of the platform.
Before I knew it I was building the platform part by part, adding features everywhere, setting up analytics, setting up payment flows, monitoring, connecting to Salesforce, setting up build pipelines and setting up the whole aws environment. I had to do everything from frontend to the backest of backends. Luckily I could grow my team a tiny bit after a while, until we were with four. But the other three were still very junior, so I also got the task of training them next to developing.
Still I learned a lot and there's so much more to tell about my time at this company, but let's move forward a bit.

Eventually I had to go back to the Netherlands because of reasons. I still worked a bit for them from over here, but the fun of it was gone without my colleagues around me, so I quit last September.

I noticed I was all burned out, had worked far too much, so I decided to take a few months off and figure out what I wanted to do with my life. I even wondered whether I wanted to stay in programming.

Fast forward to last few weeks. I figured out I actually did want to work in software still, but now I would focus on getting the right working circumstances. No more driving 3 hours every day, no more working 12 hours every day. Just work close to home and find a company with the right values.
So I started sending out resumes and I gave one recruiter the chance to arrange some interviews too. I spoke to 7 companies in the span of one week. And they were all very interested. Eventually I narrowed it down to 2 companies and asked them for offers. And the company that actually had my preference offered me significantly more than I asked for, which settled the deal.

So tomorrow I'm officially signing with them, and starting next week I'll be developing in Kotlin, diving into functional programming and running our code in serverless environments. I'm very excited!

!dev

I just had one of the worst Uber trips ever.

The guy is literally the definition of learning on the job except that the job here is driving people and he doesn't seem to learn shit!!

He opened Google Maps on his phone but never looked at it. I was directing him all the way. He randomly stopped the car completely a few times in the middle of the fucking highway!! He doesn't look at the side mirrors, he actually tilts his head left and right to check for other cars!! I'm glad I finally got to my destination in one piece.

The funny thing is that he was ranting on how bad the road is and how unreliable the GPS is. Is that how we look when we rant about clients? xD

This is an old one that I have hacked about to make it fit, so I hope it still works..
There were a business user, a B.A. and a developer on a road trip in the UK when they crossed the border into Wales. (This was antevirum, so that kind of behaviour was allowed back then).
They saw a sheep on a mountainside.
The business user cried out "Look! All the sheep in Wales are black!"
The B.A. tutted and said "Actually, all we can say is that there is at least one sheep in Wales and it is black down one side."
The developer woke up from nursing his hangover in the back seat, peered out of the window and said "How do you know its a sheep?"

Just sit on the side of the road, see people walking and waiting someone toss a coin

#just Bluetooth headphones things

When you're sitting on crowded public transportation and can't hear anything unless your phone is closer to your headphones than anyone else's, i.e. unless it's close as shit to your face 😍😍😍

When you want to listen to music for longer than 2 hours or several times during your workday but can't because the BT headphones last 2-3 hours 😍😍😍

When the left and right side don't pair with each other but you can pair with each individually 😍😍😍

When half of the button presses and user interactions aren't documented and there's no way to forget a device 😍😍😍

When you try to connect a new device to them in a public area and just see a dozen random serial numbers, so you have to wait and hope they get resolved to the headphone brand name 😍😍😍

When Satan takes your soul and the Bluetooth connection drops in hell 😍😍😍

When the music quality is lower and can experience static and maybe even skip in between 😍😍😍

When the bus hits a road bump, it falls out of your ear, and rolls halfway down the bus 😍😍😍

When it takes a long time to find them because they tiny af, and just as long to find the charging cable 😍😍😍

When manufacturers cannot agree on a standard volume sync system and so you have to check the volume and adjust every time you connect and disconnect your headphones 😍😍😍

Can we please just stop making everything Bluetooth?

Sincerely,
Someone who just wanted to listen to a 2 minute billie eilish song but found it easier to sing in his head

Data wrangling is messy

I'm doing the vegetation maps for the game today, maybe rivers if it all goes smoothly.
I could probably do it by hand, but theres something like 60-70 ecoregions to chart,
each with their own species, both fauna and flora. And each has an elevation range its
found at in real life, so I want to use the heightmap to dictate that. Who has time for that? It's a lot of manual work.

And the night prior I'm thinking "oh this will be easy."

yeah, no.

(Also why does Devrant have to mangle my line breaks? -_-)

Laid out the requirements, how I could go about it, and the more I look the more involved
it gets.

So what I think I'll do is automate it. I already automated some of the map extraction, so
I don't see why I shouldn't just go the distance.
Also it means, later on, when I have access to better, higher resolution geographic data, updating it will be a smoother process. And even though I'm only interested in flora at the moment, theres no reason I can't reuse the same system to extract fauna information.
Of course in-game design there are some things you'll want to fudge. When the players are exploring outside the rockies in a mountainous area, maybe I still want to spawn the occasional mountain lion as a mid-tier enemy, even though our survivor might be outside the cats natural habitat. This could even be the prelude to a task you have to do, go take care of a dangerous
creature outside its normal hunting range. And who knows why it is there? Wild fire? Hunted by something *more* dangerous? Poaching? Maybe a nuke plant exploded and drove all the wildlife from an adjoining region?
who knows.

Having the extraction mostly automated goes a long way to updating those lists down the road.

But for now, flora.

For deciding plants and other features of the terrain what I can do is:

* rewrite pixeltile to take file names as input,
* along with a series of colors as a key (which are put into a SET to check each pixel against)
* input each region, one at a time, as the key, and the heightmap as the source image
* output only the region in the heightmap that corresponds to the ecoregion in the key.
* write a function to extract the palette from the outputted heightmap. (is this really needed?)
* arrange colors on the bottom or side of the image by hand, along with (in text) the elevation in feet for reference.

For automating this entire process I can go one step further:
* Do this entire process with the key colors I already snagged by hand, outputting region IDs as the file names.
* setup selenium
* selenium opens a link related to each elevation-map of a specific biome, and saves the text links
(so I dont have to hand-open them)
* I'll save the species and text by hand (assuming elevation data isn't listed)
* once I have a list of species and other details, to save them to csv, or json, or another format
* I save the list of species as csv or json or another format.
* then selenium opens this list, opens wikipedia for each, one at a time, and searches the text for elevation
* selenium saves out the species name (or an "unknown") for the species, and elevation, to a text file, along with the biome ID, and maybe the elevation code (from the heightmap) as a number or a color (probably a number, simplifies changing the heightmap later on)

Having done all this, I can start to assign species types, specific world tiles. The outputs for each region act as reference.

The only problem with the existing biome map (you can see it below, its ugly) is that it has a lot of "inbetween" colors. Theres a few things I can do here. I can treat those as a "mixing" between regions, dictating the chance of one biome's plants or the other's spawning. This seems a little complicated and dependent on a scraped together standard rather than actual data. So I'm thinking instead what I'll do is I'll implement biome transitions in code, which makes more sense, and decouples it from relying on the underlaying data. also prevents species and terrain from generating in say, towns on the borders of region, where certain plants or terrain features would be unnatural. Part of what makes an ecoregion unique is that geography has lead to relative isolation and evolutionary development of each region (usually thanks to mountains, rivers, and large impassible expanses like deserts).

Maybe I'll stuff it all into a giant bson file or maybe sqlite. Don't know yet.

As an entry level programmer I may not know what I'm doing, and I may be supposed to be looking for a job, but that won't stop me from procrastinating.

Data wrangling is fun.

That all too familiar cross road, I have an evening to code, I have some key features of a large (work related) project to carry on with but I also have more side projects than I can possibly complete.

Side project or work project? I seem to find myself here most evenings.

Firefox created Firefox Focus & Forcing facebook to donate there 😂😂🐸🐸

Today I found a HASP HL key on the side of the road. Time to exercise emulation.

fuck

I'm doing this side job for a Canadian dude and he wants me to open a Wise bank account, I've never even heard of it and, obviously, no non-life-changing-dough justifies such a thing. For some wtv the fuck reason - I don't get it, honestly - the motherfucker doesn't wanna do PayPal

So... enlighten me, PLEASE, what are people rolling with these days besides PayPal?

Also, I'm pretty sure this motherfucker is putting bumps on the road expecting me to wave on it

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the other side, of course! I mean, what did you expect? Some kind of deep, philosophical answer? It's a chicken, not Socrates. Let's move on.

On a road side bench. I was testing a GPS application I did back in college. The application stopped working when I get to the destination. I figured the problem right away and couldn't resist fixing it immediately.

[ Few hours later...] (It was a small change but you know, Android studio on a low end laptop)

Tested and completed the app successfully. Oh and by the way, it was 11 in the night. I can just imagine what the people that saw me that night could have thought. 🤣

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Binary trading can be a high-risk, high-reward venture, but it is also a breeding ground for scams. Many traders have lost significant amounts of money to fraudulent platforms, dishonest brokers, and manipulated software. If you’ve fallen victim to a binary trading scam, you may be wondering if there’s any way to recover your lost funds. The answer is yes, and Recuva Hacker Solutions (RHS), the best crypto recovery company, is here to help. In this article, we’ll explore how lost funds in binary trading can be recovered and why Recuva Hacker Solutions is the most reliable and trusted service for this purpose.

Understanding Binary Trading Scams
Binary trading scams often involve fake platforms that promise high returns but are designed to steal your money. These platforms may use manipulated software to ensure you lose trades, refuse to process withdrawals, or simply disappear after collecting your funds. Scammers may also pose as legitimate brokers or use fake testimonials to gain your trust.

If you’ve been scammed, it’s important to act quickly. The sooner you take action, the higher the chances of recovering your funds. This is where Recuva Hacker Solutions (RHS) comes in. With their expertise and advanced technology, RHS can help you trace and recover your lost money.

How Recuva Hacker Solutions Can Help
Recuva Hacker Solutions (RHS) is a team of highly skilled professionals dedicated to helping victims of binary trading scams. They use state-of-the-art technology and ethical hacking techniques to investigate scams, trace fraudulent transactions, and recover lost funds. Here’s how RHS can assist you:

Blockchain Analysis: Cryptocurrency transactions are recorded on the blockchain, making it possible to trace them. RHS specializes in blockchain analysis, allowing them to track fraudulent transactions across multiple wallets and exchanges.

Advanced Tools: RHS uses cutting-edge tools to recover funds lost to scams, even in complex cases.

Proven Track Record: RHS has successfully helped countless clients recover their money, earning a reputation as the best crypto recovery company.

Client-Centric Approach: RHS prioritizes their clients’ needs and works tirelessly to achieve the best possible outcome.

Steps to Take If You’ve Been Scammed
If you’ve lost money to a binary trading scam, follow these steps to increase your chances of recovery:

Stop All Communication: Immediately cease all contact with the scammer to prevent further losses.

Gather Evidence: Collect all relevant information, including transaction records, emails, and communication with the scammer.

Contact Recuva Hacker Solutions: Reach out to RHS through their website, email, or WhatsApp to begin the recovery process.

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Recuva Hacker Solutions (RHS) is the most reliable and trusted recovery service for a reason. Here’s why you should trust them with your case:

Expertise: RHS has a team of highly skilled professionals with years of experience in crypto recovery.

Advanced Technology: They use cutting-edge tools and techniques to trace and recover lost funds.

Proven Track Record: RHS has successfully helped countless clients recover their money.

Ethical Practices: RHS operates with integrity, ensuring that all recovery efforts are conducted legally and ethically.

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If you’ve lost money to a binary trading scam, don’t hesitate to reach out to Recuva Hacker Solutions. You can contact them through the following channels:

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WhatsApp: +1 [3]15 [756] [1228]
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Lahore, the heart of Punjab and one of Pakistan's most vibrant cities, is evolving rapidly with new urban development projects. Among them, Ravi Smart City stands out as a landmark initiative. Backed by the government and designed to be a sustainable, tech-integrated, and eco-friendly urban center, one of the most frequently asked questions is:
“Where is Ravi Smart City Lahore located?”
Let’s dive deep into the Ravi Smart City Lahore Location, and why it holds massive potential for residents, businesses, and investors.

Where is Ravi Smart City Located?
Ravi Smart City Lahore Location is on the northwestern side of Lahore, beautifully planned along the Ravi River. This futuristic city is strategically positioned near Kala Shah Kaku and is close to several major access points such as:
M-2 Motorway (Lahore-Islamabad)

Lahore Ring Road (Eastern Loop)

GT Road (N-5)

Shahdara Interchange

LDA City and Lahore Smart City proximity

This premium location of Ravi Smart City Lahore ensures excellent connectivity and places it at the center of major trade, residential, and commercial activity.

Why the Ravi Smart City Lahore Location Matters
1. Proximity to Central Lahore
The Ravi Smart City Lahore location guarantees quick access to Lahore’s main urban and business centers. Residents will be just 20–30 minutes away from areas like Gulberg, DHA, and Airport Road, making it ideal for daily commuters.
2. Strategic Positioning Near Infrastructure
Situated close to both the Motorway and the Ring Road, this location makes intercity travel efficient and hassle-free. The Ravi Smart City Lahore Location is ideal for logistics, business setups, and urban migration.
3. Eco-Friendly and Sustainable Environment
Thanks to its riverside setting, the project is designed with sustainability at its core. The location of Ravi Smart City Lahore supports green living, smart waste management, and environmentally conscious development.
4. Growth Corridor for Future Investment
The Ravi Smart City Lahore Location lies within a major urban growth corridor under the Ravi Riverfront Urban Development Project (RRUDP). With IT parks, medical cities, education zones, and commercial centers planned, this area is set to become a powerhouse of economic growth.

Nearby Landmarks and Connectivity
Some of the key nearby landmarks that add value to the Ravi Smart City Lahore Location include:
University of Engineering & Technology (UET)

Allama Iqbal International Airport (approx. 40 min drive)

Shahdara Town and Railway Station

Orange Line Metro Station (future extension potential)

Ferozwala and Sheikhupura Industrial Zones

These well-connected landmarks make the location of Ravi Smart City Lahore ideal for both living and investment purposes.

Is Ravi Smart City a Good Investment?
Absolutely. The Ravi Smart City Lahore Location, with its central positioning, infrastructure access, and future-forward planning, makes it a high-yield investment opportunity. Whether you want to build a dream home or secure long-term returns, this is the location to watch.

Final Thoughts
The Ravi Smart City Lahore Location is more than just a spot on the map—it represents the future of smart urban living in Pakistan. From sustainability and tech integration to economic development and accessibility, it has everything modern city life demands.
If you're looking to invest in Lahore's next big real estate opportunity, start by exploring the Ravi Smart City Lahore Location—the heart of a smart and sustainable tomorrow.

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The experience was nothing short of devastating. Watching my hard-earned funds disappear into thin air was a brutal reminder of the risks inherent in the cryptocurrency market. I felt a mix of emotions: anger, frustration, and a deep sense of regret. How could I have been so naive? Why didn't I see the warning signs?
As I navigated the dark waters of cryptocurrency fraud, I began to realize that I was not alone. Countless others had suffered similar fates, and many had given up hope of ever recovering their losses. But I refused to accept defeat. I was determined to fight back, to reclaim what was rightfully mine. It was during this tumultuous period that I stumbled upon a team of expert hackers specializing in cryptocurrency recovery. CORE ASSET INC RECOVERY FIRM expertise and professionalism were immediately apparent, and I felt a glimmer of hope that I had not felt in weeks. Could they really help me recover my stolen funds $480,000? was always a question about working with them. The answer, I soon discovered, was a resounding yes. The team worked tirelessly to track down the scammers, employing cutting-edge technology and innovative strategies to stay one step ahead. CORE ASSET INC RECOVERY FIRM dedication and perseverance were inspiring, and I found myself feeling increasingly confident that justice would be served with hopes of recovering my lost funds.
CORE ASSET INC RECOVERY FIRM Asset Inc worked on my case, I provided them with the required information they needed to work with on my case. The road to recovery was long and arduous, I doubted the possibility of retrieval at times, but ultimately, it was worth it. With the team's expertise and guidance, I was able to recover a significant portion of my stolen funds. The sense of relief and vindication was overwhelming, and I felt a deep sense of gratitude towards the team that had helped me achieve this outcome. ( Coreassetinc @ Gmail dot com/Telegram: @ Coreassetinc)

In the end, my experience with cryptocurrency fraud taught me a valuable lesson: that even in the darkest of times, there is always hope. And with the right team of experts on your side, even the most seemingly insurmountable challenges can be overcome.

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Motorcycle accidents can result in devastating injuries, from broken bones and spinal injuries to traumatic brain injuries and even fatalities. The physical, emotional, and financial toll of a motorcycle accident can be overwhelming, leaving victims unsure of how to navigate the complexities of insurance claims and legal proceedings. If you’ve been involved in a motorcycle accident in Miami, having an experienced motorcycle accident lawyer by your side is essential to ensuring you receive the compensation you deserve. At Pita Weber Del Prado, we are committed to protecting the rights of motorcycle accident victims and guiding them through every step of the legal process.

Why You Need a Motorcycle Accident Lawyer in Miami
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At Pita Weber Del Prado, we specialize in representing motorcycle accident victims in Miami and surrounding areas. Our legal team has a deep understanding of Florida’s motorcycle laws, insurance regulations, and how to navigate the complex issues that arise in these types of cases.

Common Causes of Motorcycle Accidents
Motorcycle accidents can happen for a variety of reasons. Some of the most common causes include:

Distracted Drivers: One of the leading causes of motorcycle accidents is other drivers not paying attention to the road. Distracted driving—such as texting, using a phone, or even eating—can prevent drivers from noticing a motorcyclist, leading to collisions.

Failure to Yield: Drivers often fail to yield the right of way to motorcyclists, particularly at intersections, causing accidents. Many drivers simply don’t notice motorcyclists or fail to check their blind spots before changing lanes or making turns.

Speeding and Reckless Driving: Speeding and aggressive driving are dangerous for all road users, but they are particularly risky for motorcyclists. Excessive speed reduces the time to react to hazards, which can lead to accidents.

Road Hazards: Poor road conditions—such as potholes, uneven surfaces, or wet roads—can be especially dangerous for motorcyclists. These hazards can cause loss of control, resulting in crashes.

Impaired Driving: Driving under the influence of alcohol or drugs significantly impairs a driver’s reaction time and ability to judge distances, leading to crashes involving motorcycles.

How a Motorcycle Accident Lawyer Can Help You
If you’ve been injured in a motorcycle accident, you may be facing steep medical bills, lost wages, and emotional distress. An experienced motorcycle accident lawyer can help you by:

Investigating the Accident: Our team will conduct a thorough investigation into the accident, gathering crucial evidence such as witness statements, police reports, and accident scene photographs. We will also work with accident reconstruction experts, if necessary, to establish fault.

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The ink doesn't wash off, but I thought my Bitcoin was gone forever. I'd stashed $130,000 worth of crypto away to turn my tattoo parlor into a fantasy parlor—black walls, neon lights, the hum of needles mixed with classic rock music. But fate is cruelly ironic.
One night, having spent an eight-hour shift etching half a snake wrapped around a dagger, I came home to find the shop robbed. Cash register emptied out, machines thrown around like playthings, and the worst of all, my phone stolen. That phone had my 2FA codes, the sacred keys to my digital riches.
Panic washed over me like road rash on bare flesh. Without 2FA, my Bitcoin was more secure than a welded-shut vault. I plunged into horror. Every hour out of reach was like watching a masterpiece rot in the sun.
Desperate, I griped to a client at a cover-up session. He had a Bitcoin logo stitched on his sleeve, alongside a skull laughing maniacally in a Digital hat. He leaned back in the chair, grinning like an old road captain, and said, "Brother, you need Digital Tech Guard Recovery. Those guys do magic."
So, taking his tip, I did call them up. From the very first phone call, they were sharper than a new needle. They were in the business—talking carrier records, blockchain synchronization, and security breaches like old truckers swapping stories of carburetor war battles and close calls.
They labored fast. Five days went by before I got the call. "We got it," the technician said. My heart was revving like a helicopter engine. My Bitcoin was once more in my hands, safe and sound.
The Digitals did not cease. They guided me through backups, multi-device login, and offline wallets. "One key in your pocket, another in the wind," they said. Biker street smarts meets crypto security.
Now, my studio is thriving. That neon sign? It glows brighter than ever. And on my forearm? A new tattoo: a Digital hat, with flames and Bitcoin logos surrounding it. A reminder that in this world, both on the road and on the internet, it's not about not falling, it's about knowing who you can call to pick you up. Digital Tech Guard Recovery: They're by your side, even when the ride gets rocky
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Finding Hope Amid Financial Ruin: My Encounter with ADWARE RECOVERY SPECIALIST

When the walls came crashing down around me, and my financial stability seemed to vanish into thin air, I found myself in the throes of a desperate situation. Faced with mounting debts, dwindling savings, and the constant fear of losing everything I had worked so hard to build, I felt utterly adrift, unsure of where to turn or how to regain my footing. It was in the midst of this bleak and overwhelming predicament that I stumbled upon ADWARE RECOVERY SPECIALIST, a beacon of hope amidst the darkness. Email info: Adwarerecoveryspecialist@ auctioneer. net

As I delved into their services, I was struck by the professionalism and compassion of their team. They listened intently to my story, offering a sympathetic ear and a genuine desire to help me navigate the complex maze of financial recovery. With their guidance, I began to unravel the tangled web of my financial troubles, uncovering hidden opportunities and exploring avenues I had never considered. Their expertise in areas like debt management, credit restoration, and asset protection proved invaluable, as they meticulously crafted a personalized plan to help me regain control of my finances and rebuild my life.

The road to recovery was by no means an easy one, but with ADWARE RECOVERY SPECIALIST by my side, I found the courage and determination to take on each challenge head-on. Their unwavering support and unwavering commitment to my success kept me motivated, even in the face of setbacks, and their ability to break down complex financial concepts into digestible, actionable steps empowered me to make informed decisions that aligned with my long-term goals. Slowly but surely, I watched as the clouds of despair parted, and a glimmer of hope began to emerge on the horizon. WhatsApp info:+12 723 328 343

Today, as I look back on that turbulent time in my life, I am filled with a profound sense of gratitude for the role that ADWARE RECOVERY SPECIALIST played in helping me overcome the financial ruin that threatened to consume me. Their expertise, empathy, and unwavering dedication to their clients have left an indelible mark, and I am confident that their services will continue to be a beacon of hope for others facing similar financial challenges. If you find yourself in this kind of situation, please contact ADWARE RECOVERY SPECIALIST right now: