QUEUE
me: don't do it
her: don't do it
hex: don't do it
the lobe: don't do it

brain: k-wèh-weh 😬

Saying "Java is the best programming language because it works across all platforms" is the same as saying "Butt sex is the best form of sex because it works across all of the animal kingdom"

Woohooo, I'm going to Tokyo!
Our paper was accepted to a robotics conference. We have the pleasure of playing with tiny drones, and we get paid and rewarded for it!

(The girl in the video is my amazing collaborator, Hanna)
https://youtube.com/watch/...

Skynet in operation, Judgment Day minus a few months...

The institute where I did my B.Sc is under a ransomware attack, and I'm bracing myself for the publication of my embarrassing transcripts, and possibly the even more humiliating scans of my exams 🤣
Oh, well.

How geeky you are from 0 to getting merchandise from Intel?

Yoda speaks like he wasn't careful with his async calls

"a Jedi You are"

$work: Ey @Root, make this super simple thing.
$work: No, not like that.
$work: It also needs to do A, B, and C.
$work: No, not there. You should build it somewhere else, but I won't tell you where.
$work: You need to build out F and G, too.
$work: What do you mean you don't have the data? Just ask support drone #3. (who directs me to #2, and that one to #8 who doesn't know, and that one to #12 who won't answer)
$work: Why can't I do K, Y, or S? You should be able to infer these from the mind of whoever wrote the ticket by its wording, despite no mention of them whatsoever.
$work: Are you done yet? It's a super simple ask!

Do I need to know every framework to be senior developer?

Apparently a twitter engineer got fired today via email and this is the email he received

exit vim

I’ve started a new devRant iOS client with SwiftUI.

https://github.com/WilhelmOks/...

How are ya doing, fellow humans?

How to step up the level of emotional torture PhD students are subjected to by academia:
In addition to the normal status for submitted papers, which are "received", "under review" and "decision pending", let's add "undisclosed"!
Which means they know about the decision, you know they know, they know you know they know, but they will still leave you hanging for an unknown period of time, bathing in acidic dread.

For loops

Last week in dR Hunger Games...
▶ https://youtu.be/Aj97BNLuhZI

Watch as 24 tributes from the number of devRant users beat each other in this violent simulation. Introducing the 2nd week of craziness, now in entertaining video form! 🤣

I'm in a few women in tech groups. A woman, who is a highly experienced developer, shared that she had a conversation with her male friend, who is a startup founder. He said that his criteria for recruitment are high levels of math and physics since high school and early interest in programming (e.g. age of 10). She said his criteria made her sad and excluded.

A fellow woman developer commented that it's reasonable to feel sad when you learn your good friend is an idiot. I snorted some Monster out of my nose reading this and I'm still coughing and chuckling.

To be honest, the founder's requirements do sound super ridiculous, and I imagine his startup is made up of clones of the same guy type, wearing different shades of gray t shirts and sandals with socks.

Working with assembly is just something different... note to self: keep a cheat-sheet with the labels and corresponding addresses at hand.....

Stakeholder: There’s a bug on the site.

Me: That’s not a bug. The site is supposed to do that. Your team asked for that feature and we implemented it last summer.

SH: They did?

Me: Yes, they did.

SH: You sure it’s been like this since last summer?

Me: YES!!!

Not bad vs 2022. Not bad !

I wanted to write that (really, not a joke).
Sometimes, auto complete just works.

Me and my Jewish friend were eating lunch and I farted. He got mad so I said "cmon man a little gas never killed anyone".

This year Chinese New year is so quiet. Hmmmm

Thinking of starting an OnlyFans where I post all the atrocious shitcode that I find to make my fans miserable….

I work in huge corporation. Got an offer for smaller company and gave 2 week notice. My corporation offered me better base salary and retention bonus to stay. I accepted (mistake) and now they are not coming back with retention bonus or salary increase. I found out they did same trick with different person. Wtf... huge corporation is doing those kind of shenanigans?

JSON de/serializer for C++, recommendations?

I used boost serialization until now, and it's fine.
But I will need to send some stuff over REST protocol to my future-web-GUI.
I would like something that is easy to build, not bloated, and could handle class serialization.
Shoot!

In Soviet Union, people cut x-ray films into circles and used them to make vinyl records of popular Western music that wasn't available because of the iron curtain. Sound quality was atrocious, but that wasn't the point. I have several of such records in my vinyl collection, it was my grandma who was involved in this culture when she was young.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...

Training the beast!
Hopefully I will submit my paper soon, and then I can share a video of the beast in action :)

This was in production for 3 years

Behold the PHP pyramid of doom!
You know what kind of code is coming... a big pile of shite! 😍

Obviously you have to return by reference (&) because of performance and memory reasons. ☝️🤓

Man... I've seen code...

Once C++ walks into a bar and sees C.

C is drunk, falling on the floor, spitting, and swearing.

How classless! -says C++