This one wins

So true...

Dear Colleague who ended a call I overheard today with the sentence "I'm off next week, if there is anything - anything! -, call me on my mobile phone!". Fuck you. If you value your work more than your family, that's not only your problem. You're fucking my clients expectations, too. I don't think you're a hero. You're a moron.

Here we go again… a new update for devRant unofficial UWP blocked by Microsoft because contains "profanity"...

Interesting fact:
The screenshots which contain """profanity""" (probably bad words are enough to violate the rules) are still the same you can already find in the store, so even without this update they are visible...

You know a shitty recruiter when he/she offers you a job because 'I analyzed your github profile and noticed your extensive expertise in PHP', although all you did was cloning an extremly large PHP project and made one commit over thousands of lines of code which you simply generated through a fully automated php5 to php7 converter.

Disclaimer: never wrote a line of PHP before.

Documentation is like friends. I don't have friends.

Is anybody here doing competitive programming?

Paint is the best IDE for programming.

Fuck Windows tho.

How do I set the theme to life to be dark?

Why isn't the follow button more intuitively placed, without going through a separate menu? I found it just by accidentally pressing the three dots.

That feeling when someone sees your rant, upvotes it and then checks out and upvotes other rants of yours.

so i guess ill use my code.org teacher for this:

"credit card information is encrypted with the public keys"

"lists and arrays are the same thing"

"javascript is a powerful, fast, programming language" (bhahahaha)

"javascript is [only] used in web browsers"

"java and javascript are *extremely similar* but not the same"

Where is the best place to pick up freelance work that actually pays a realistic amount?

I’ve been on sites like o-desk where there are folks looking for pretty big jobs and they have a budget of $100.

Good job, Lenovo

Buzzword dictionary to deal with annoying clients:

AI—regression
Big data—data
Blockchain—database
Algorithm—automated decision-making
Cloud—Internet
Crypto—cryptocurrency
Dark web—Onion service
Data science—statistics done by nonstatisticians
Disruption—competition
Viral—popular
IoT—malware-ready device

Ok people. If you see a forum with an issue you're having, for the love of fuck, don't post "Omg I'm having that same issue!" Quite frankly, I don't give two shits if you have this issue or not. It's annoying as fuck to have to read through 3 pages of that bullshit to get to the answer for the problem.

I've been programming for a while and worked on some relatively interesting projects but I haven't worked in the industry yet. The rants people make here, they make feel as if I know nothing and to some extent, it's a bit intimidating. I still love it though :-)

There is NOTHING more satisfying than having an algorithm suddenly click while you are in the shower.

I got a program for determining Prime Numbers using Extended Euclid Algorithm from ~2 to .28 seconds <3

How to make those marketing staff of x service stop sending you an email when they don't have unsubscribe link:

1. Reply back asking about the free tier/plan
2. Profit!

2 days and no word from them after spamming me daily about the service

My first rant here, don't know how to start, but fuck these self proclaimed senior developers who can't even get their concepts right about basic things and don't believe in reading docs.

Fuck you for asking if sequelize has a method to return details of the logged in user of your app, it's a fucking ORM you dumbfuck. You are a "full stack" developer for fuck's sake.

Fuck you for making those "minor changes" which breaks build and then blame it on any random plugin or lib used, or my commits.

Fuck you for expecting me to review your code on Sundays because you couldn't finish it on time.

I don't like java, at all, but even I get that without it we wouldn't be where we are right now and can't reach where we aspire to reach. But you can't keep chanting "Java is dead, Java is dead" every chance you get. No, it's NOT dead. Nor is going to, anytime soon.

And for god's sake, please stop choosing one library/plugin over another just on the basis of stars on repo, it's not the only (or valid) criteria. Look if you actually even need it. Think.

And please learn how to google first, and also stop using "the" before every the noun, the adjective and the verb. It's the fucking the annoying to read.

And yes, there are different linting presets out there, and just because a piece of code in a plugin/library/boilerplate is not following your specific, and may I say horrible standard, doesn't mean it's a "bad code". It's written by people who have created/worked-on these libraries as side projects on which your entire career is based upon.

And I haven't even talked about the code you write or your domain knowledge or the way you treat other people. So get off your high horse and behave like a developer, a real one.