On the first day of Christmas, the bossman gave to me: The fact that my new computer purchase order needs to be OKed by the CEO and I need to continue working on a 2014 Mac Mini (i5-4260U, 8 Gig RAM, GPU shot by an ESD on the case long ago) for the next year.
On the second day of Christmas, my family gave to me... a good reason to get shitfaced
On the third day of Christmas, getting shitfaced gave to me: A hangover and some urgent plastic welding job that had to be done with a soldering iron. FML, I've had a headache before breathing in pure hydro-cyano-whatthefuckyougetwhenyoumeltplastics
On the fourth day of Christmas, my team gave to me: A legacy, age-old Rails 2 project that was written by an intern and never reviewed, went to prod in 2014 and can't be changed anymore, but needs to be changed after the fact that it has zero test coverage and needs 100 % now to prevent issues and costly manual testing.
On the fifth day of Christmas, devrant gave to me: The Idea that making fun of Christmas songs to get over the sheer amount of dicks that working over the twelve days of Christmas sucks.

To be continued...

Writing an ISO to a USB is basically making the OS dig it's own grave...

Sorry guys, I don't really care if something is open or closed source. Code just needs to work well.

semifuckincolon

Seems right to me ;P

I don't mind if you down vote my answers on stack-overflow. But unless you leave a better answer or a comment explaining why, you are a fucking troll and an asshole.

I MEAN, YOU SHOULD TAKE A BIG STEP BACK AND LITERALLY FUCK YOUR OWN FACE!!!!

You aren't helping me or others learn from our mistakes by showing us the better way.

Source: xkcd.com

Finally someone is putting it correctly

Was doing some work on a server today and removing loads of stuff.

rm -rf file1
Etc
Etc
Etc

Went into another directory with very important data. Wanted to do ls -la but my fingers went:
rm -rf ./
.
.
*1 milisecond later*
😶
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
CTRL+C
CTRL+C
CTRL+C
CTRL+C
CTRL+C
CTRL+C
CTRL+C
CTRL+C
CTRL+C
CTRL+C
CTRL+C
CTRL+C
CTRL+C
CTRL+C
CTRL+C
*VIGOROUSLY CHECKS FILES*

Everything still there 😅

Waiting for a presentation and someone stole the chromecast

I brushed my teeth and went to bed at 10, opened up youtube and just chilled out,
boss calls me up at 11 I'm like, nah fam tomorrow...
Calls again and again and again, calling for the 6 time on 2 numbers!?
(M8 can't u see I'm out)
Then he texts me, bro, it's urgent!
I decide to call him up.
Boss: hey dude
Me: hey (trying to not get triggered)
Me: so what's so urgent?
Boss: OK so 2 things, I will email all of our job applicants on August 28, 2: are you available tomorrow?
Me: ( LITERALLY GOT TRIGGERED AS FUCK, THOUGHT WE HAD A DICK PICTURE ON OUR SITE OR HOSTINGER DECIDED TO BILL 2 TIMES)
ME: 👏Dude, this is so urgent? R u kidding me???? Am I available tomorrow and you will email are job applicants on August 28????

Ffs I swear

New for avatars - emotions! You can now change your facial expression on your avatar to better capture your dev mood! Getting expressions working right turned out to be quite the undertaking due to the ripple effect of the various layers that each expression touched so our total layers just for men ballooned out from 300 layers to 1100. And @dfox re-architecting how layers work to handle the interconnectedness of expression meant tying together facial expression, skin tone, facial hair, and hair color to make sure everything stays in sync. It’s a fun new addition, I hope everyone enjoys!

I also want to apologize for the delay in getting this out, I meant to have this done ages ago but I got thrown a curveball at work and was laid off back in April and have been super stressed running around trying to find a new job for the past 3 months. I figured I’d have more free time to work on devRant, but hunting for work is so exhausting, it’s really taken its toll emotionally and financially (no unemployment benefits because according to my state even though we lose money every month “you’re still a corporate officer”). Things are finally looking promising on the job search front, and I expect once things get back to normal @dfox and I can get our release velocity back up, but until then, please bear with me.

P.S. If you have the resources, we certainly do appreciate your support with devRant++ Your monthly contributions really do make a difference! Thanks all!

Today me :
It’s 9 am, let’s work a bit, open the terminal, type vim.

What a mistake.

It’s 7 pm, still don’t do anything yet, just browsing some cool stuff on vim, vimawesome.com

Today was a good day.

So if anyone have post it before please tell me and I will erase

I had a nightmare I was at work, the building was on fire, but I couldn't get out.

I'm more terrified that in this nightmare, my boss told me he uses devrant.

So much rant against the GDPR. In the meanwhile USA Today created a site just for the EU. No Tracking or Ads. A site which was normally 5mb big to load is now 500kb for the EU! Awesome! Thats what the internet could be!

The rants I read here make me want to be a better developer. I started writing tests, linting code and ensuring 'quality code' because of the devrant community. Being a self taught developer, you never really have anyone to thank. But today I would like to appriciate you all for the rants, comments and advice that make us developers become better at our craft.

Broke the return key today.
Already feeling like the employee or the year.

Point of no return.

devRant reached the Philippines! Thank you @dfox and @trogus for this treat. Greatly appreciated!

ps. i named her devi (Hahaha)

"I solemnly swear, my code is 💯% mistrake free."

My son came from kindergarten with a picture he painted. And that's what I found on the backside of the paper.

You know you've become a dev when standard keyboard left hand position is no longer wasd

Shit Overflow

HeckOverflow

I wasn't going to post this because I expected loads of hate but fuck it, I'd rather share it anyways. Also take into account that sometimes there's no choice because money is needed or other circumstances :)

This one guy told me to never let down my values and what I stand for if I can afford to do that, no matter what they are.

I'd quit my job over having to use tools like Google or Slack (luckily my company is highly against using Slack and most people have moved to ddg) and as for WhatsApp, I said at my interview that I'd either wanted a business phone for using WhatsApp or I wouldn't use it. Boss said 'thats cool!'

I quote from him(that person who said this to me):

"they force you to use something you're uncomfortable with? Fuck'em. They don't understand your reasons? Their problem.
Even if nobody in the entire world understands/accepts your reasons, doesn't mean they're not valid."

Ubuntu 18.04 is sooo beautiful 😊 I can't connect to WiFi or ping 8.8.8.8 but it's soooo beautiful 😊

Haha , this is so me

I swear that some people in StackOverflow are there just to downvote others...

Had to implement an API reporting on exabytes of data, scaling up eventually to a zettabyte.

I'd never even heard of these words until I started on the project.

Is the technical term for a failed Kubernetes deployment a "clusterfuck"?

Git spoons , forks and knife and plate also available 😂😂😂😂🙌