I personally like to hold my compiler at gunpoint

When you make a typo in a command and spend 20 minutes googling why it isn't working trust me its time to sleep and reboot.

I don't always listen to music while coding, but when I do, it's because things are absolutely unmitigably fucked and it's going to take some herculean effort to unfuck it.

I have this thing I've done for more years than my kids have been alive when shit really hits the fan and I need to show the staff the old lady can still lay waste.

Step 1: put on "the playlist," which consists of only the most aggressive 90s marilyn manson songs.*
Step 2: put on the headphones, which are noise cancelling and super bassy
Step 3: pound a monster (blue, obv)
Step 4: get super manic
Step 5: get in the zone and destroy several features or a flotilla of bugs in a single night
Step N: make absolute fucking magic
Step N+1: call in sick the next day and sleep til noon

What's your hero process?

*Content has less to do with it than the headspace I've come to associate with it and the fact I can't get drowsy with the constant aggression.

First commission done! Tofu 60%, Krytox 205g0 lubed creams, SA keycaps, and a special surprise foam dampening plate for extra thocc on that Brass plate.

Nooo...

What does this even mean?!

I am certainly not the master of QA

🐧🐧🐧

The year is 2030. Apple have attached cameras to their new glasses models.
Jobs at risk due to people leaking footage of their friends' jokes made with little thought.

No one is safe. Everyone is cancelled.

It really works🥳

What kind of headache are you guys having right now?

True Shit!!!

Third time that I redesign my app UI. I hate myself

my wife is setting up her new phone that arrived today. maybe i am a bit jealous. on the other hand i dont know how using devrant, reddit and duckduckgo justifies a new phone. better save this for my dream computer.

Right Ctrl be like - You guys are getting clicked? XD

Finally catching up on comics...

Well... instead of imposter syndrome I think I have something more alike "I can't fucking tell if I'm smarter than everyone around me or if I'm so dumb I have no clue what's going on"-syndrome.
And trying to be rational, I usually consider the second option to be more probabile... right?
Or maybe, the way my brain processes things is just so different from the people I know that It creates a layer of incomunicability, so that others can't understand my reasoning as much as I can't understand theirs.
The usual speaking-through-jargon-all-the-time trend I've encountered is also not helping.
So I strive daily to align myself to what's going on, trying not to slow anybody down, but that drains my mental energies so much I end up getting done so little... and then I realize _everybody_ has done a similar amount of work.
Are maybe my standards too high?
Or it's normal for teamwork to slow everybody down THIS much?

I used to work much better alone, or in teams with proper separation of tasks between people. Like - we agree on a common interface and then everybody goes his own way implementing his part, and as long as the contract is respected and nothing breaks, nobody cares about what's inside the boxes.

But I don't see it coming again anytime soon, and people seem to have an averagely-good opinion of my work. So well, if I get paid and things cruise along fine, there should be nothing to complain about.

Shit, I've let my flow of consciousness out.

My coworker told me today that since my birthday was this week I could take Monday off. I was so stoked before I realized Monday is Memorial Day.

Considering the shit I pull on this coworker and the future shit I will pull on him. I have to say it was fair enough.

Literally every piece of code I’m debugging rn

Is it me only or everyone can here forgotten about weekend because of fucking coronavirus

I hope I catch something good today

just posted my first question on StackOverflow as a lurker, hopefully i don’t get murdered for asking a probably very simple react native question....

FUCK YOU NAGLE AND YOUR DUMB ALGORITHM!!! AND EVERYONE AT WHATEVER COMPANY DECIDED THAT DISABLING IT IS NOT SOMETHING THEY SHOULD IMPLEMENT!! WHAT THE FUCK MAN

Asking a question on StackOverflow...

Mid to senior devs flexing on juniors

Quarantine office setup, forgot to post a while back

Fullstack

ARGH the next person to tell me how X is the best toolchain is getting their fucking head cut off! Holy fucking shit, this is even more annoying than the whole IDE debate. At least with IDEs everyone has a favourite one and they hate others accordingly, with build toolchains there's always a huge group of fucktards sucking each other's dick by adding new features, and they're always too busy wanking their sparkling features for small projects to realise how fucking inefficient their polished dings and dongs are for any bigger job.

For the millionth time, no, we're not switching to this popular toolchain just because it gave you a blowjob with your pet project (although that would indeed be a tempting offer), so stop talking how fast and flexible it is. Until you can show how it compiles a 500 MB project faster than our current setup, I don't give a shit how many people jerk on that nookie.

Web Developer meme

I am lazy..