My girlfriend knows what a coder needs when it’s their birthday. Lucky to have her. Walked into my room and it was set up like this.

Schrödinger’s semicolon

Source: reddit r/programming

No questions asked

This guy

Was told not to use uuid‘ for security reasons. Just shipped to production.

Why is ML soooo hyped !

I solemnly swear to never buy a laptop with a realtek WiFi adapter again. Linux kernel doesn't fucking support it.

Every now and then... try this.

How to solve problems in Java: change the language

So i quit my job today, after signing my contract termination things i asked them if i could check for some personal stuff in my work laptop. and on getting there i quickly went to terminal and did a "rm -rf /"

first time i ever did that willingly, had just been reading stories. i have to say it felt awesome to tell them its now dead, that they cant check what was on it. best feeling in a long time

You know you're fucked when you start searching answers on quora instead of Stack Overflow.

Me : "Hey, I can't find the comments.js file, do you know where it is stored?"
Co-worker : "Yep, look in the CSS folder"
Me : "OK, thanks!"

5 seconds later..

Me : "Wait, what?"

Son of a bitch!

*Mom shows me laptop ad of 3000 bucks with the most overkill specs ever*

Mom: "Son, will this laptop run Google?"

Me: "Do you want to surf Google or actually run Google's server?"

Mom: *looks confused*

"I also want to use Fesabook on it"

Me: *brings her a 5 year old laptop with a new ssd in it*

*has an old i3, 8gb ram and no gpu*

Mom: "This laptop is super fast! Thanks son!"

*One hour later*

*Mom calls*

"Son, I think the laptop broke"

Me: "What? What happened?"

Mom: "I pressed a button and now all the keys are lighting red" (backlit keyboard)

Me: "You can choose the color of your keyboard mom"

Mom: "Ooh! How do I make it pink?"

Me: "You can only choose between red and blue..."

Mom: "What a ripoff"

*Hangs up the phone*

Github after Microsoft purchase

The good spaghetti code stuff

I think my weather app wants to call me someday!

I gave him the GitHub repo link for download. He doesn't know how to download it.

// I probably should have sent the zip folder through mail or use Google drive 😐

HTML vs html5

The world is about to end

Dev: Microsoft is shit

VS Code: (ಥ⌣ಥ)

Dev: Oh not you dear! You're not like the other guys

VS Code: (｡◕‿◕｡)

My Avengers Merchandise 😂😂

In Europe, we use € instead of $ in jQuery.

------------ Programmer's Fact -----------

The root is at the top of the Tree🌳.

.

IntelliJ, you know I love you... But WTF ?!

macOS treats chess like it's the System32 file in windows

Just found the best dev ever.

https://alcohollick.com/tfw.html

So im 14, and I'm going to 8th grade. We are learning python for about 3 weeks now. Literally nobody in my class doesn't even get variables. Like how.

Me: *puts small piece of tape over webcam*

NSA: Okay guys, shut it all down. No way we can record from the microphone, log keys, access the file system, USB devices, network data or watch the screen. He did the tape.