When you're so into your project that you feel like peeing is a waste of time...

"Why are people using Git? It's too complicated. Dropbox can do the same kind of things."

- A fellow CS student at university

I really appreciate that it's devRant, not dev_rant

// repost \\
To all new devs:
• Your language of choice is fine.
• There is no superior way to indent, yours is fine.
• Your IDE is fine.
• Your OS is fine.

Unless you work in my team, of course.

There are two kinds of developers in this world:
Those that finish the project they started, and

As a Python user and the fucking unicode mess, this is sooooo mean!

Difference between C# and Javascript
Me: Hold my cup of tea.
C#: That's not a cup of tea.
Me: Hold my cup of tea, with two teaspoons of sugar in it.
C#: That's not a cup of tea with two tea spoons of sugar in it.
Me: Hold my cup of tea, with two teaspoons of sugar and milk in it.
C#: That is not a cup of tea, with two teaspoons of sugar and milk it.
...
Me: Hold my cup of tea.
Javascript: I'll hold your cup of coffee.

Wyyyyy?

Leaving Vim open on a public computer

When your boss asks you to debug some crappy legacy code and you need to bring in the heavy artillery

When your program runs perfectly on the first try

Source: /r/ProgrammerHumor

Crap, I'm late to a meeting I was invited to 30 seconds ago.

I am so sick and tired of hearing "I'm not good with computers" from these god damn secretaries I have to work with.

Fuck you! I mean, seriously, FUCK YOU! That God damn piece of shit Windows XP door stop has been on your desk for at LEAST a decade (shit, I think that was the same PC my highschool had, and I'm in my mid thirties)!

What in the FUCK do you mean you don't know the difference between files and folder? How? HOW can you stare at that damn screen every fucking work day off your life and not grasp simple concepts!

And FUCK THE ADMINISTRATION for hiring these volunteerily ignorant babies who refuse to bother figuring out more than just where the power button is (and, fuck me, even THAT took years).

Fuck me if, after spending 40 God damn minutes of my time trying to guide some secretary, who's been working twice as long as I have and making probably twice as much, on how to copy a file from one folder to another, I have to listen to some fucking pity speech "I just don't get this high tech computer stuff. I'm just too old"

And FUCK society for allowing this fucking behavior! I don't know any other piece of technology where people are happy being so blindly ignorant to even the basics! I don't know Jack shit about the internal working of a car, but I know where and how to use my steering wheel and peddles and that I need to take the thing for an oil change. Hell, I even know when my tires look bad... If I can do that, you can fucking learn how to copy a god damn file without needing me to help you... FOR A FUCKING HOUR!

FUUUUCK!

*Takes a deep breath*
So... How was your day?

Today I watched the first season of silicon valley. Why have I not watched it earlier...

My company just blocked devRant ip...

Well, now I need to use my own mobile data to procrastinate

Put headphones on when I got to work at 7:30am.. it's 3:10pm and I just realised I never started playing music 😑

How to make sure your users appreciate your work

JuniorDev: I made some changes to your code and it seems to work better.
Me: Awesome, thanks dude.
Inner-me: Who the hell does he think he is.

Similar with pluses on devRant

I have been getting a lot of angry glances in meetings since my latest laptop sticker :D

Here we go

Fuck you to all the bosses who don't give a Fuck about their employees.

The bugs have learned to hide

Just ordered my rubber duck. It'll be here in 2 to 3 business days...

Replaced all the echo statements in my utility scripts with cowsay. This is great :-)

The satisfaction when you finish tasks/project and you close 16 chrome tabs at once.

Push your commits before anyone else, so you don't have to resolve any merge conflicts 😈

So seeing everybody posting different "volume controls" from r/programmerhumour, here is the most simplest imo

Beer. When working on a personal project or working from home. Helps me relax, find the problem, and move on