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That facepalm moment when the client rejects your code saying it's too small, and it might contain bugs.6
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Story time! Promised this, so making good on the promise. Eh-hem.
Misunderstandings [A slice of life short play that actually happened]
Dramatis Personae (anonymized, bc of course):
Moi ........ me, myself and possibly some lint
Robert ..... co-architect
Daisy ...... line dev
Lisa ....... also line dev
Prologue: the beginninning
[A project is starting up, new devs are coming on, including the two individuals who drive this story.
Daisy, of Indian origin, an exceptional dev and lovely person. Mother, wife, very conservative by upbringing in her early 40s.
Lisa, also exceptional dev, lovely person. Mother, also wife, self-made immigrant with liberal views derived from personal pride and self-bootstrapping]
Enter the office, We introduce everyone, off to a nice start, everyone is happy and excited to be working on [large bank project].
Lisa and Daisy form a friendship of commonality, they have similar backgrounds by all appearances and similar concerns due to children the same age and shared employment. They seem to become fast friends and things proceed normally for some months. Smooth sailing, all is well.
The fuse is lit.
Scene: Lunchtime gossip
[Robert, middle 40s architect adjacent Moi, also architect, age is my own damn business [old, so very old].]
Robert: "So, it seems like Daisy and Lisa are getting along great."
Moi: *snerfs a little, almost chokes on enchilada* Yes, yes they are, It's nice to see...
Robert: *eyebrow, having learned to read my expressions* "Aaaaaaand..."
Moi: "I adore both of them, but they are primarily friends because they don't actually understand most of what the other says"
[Lisa has a thick Taiwanese accent, Daisy has a standard northern indian accent. Never the two shall meet]
Robert: "Are you sure, they seem to have a lot of conversations?"
Moi: "Positive, you weren't at lunch with the three of us. They're polar opposite in terms of values, it'll be fine so long as that never comes up"
Robert: "I'm not even digging into that"
Moi: *flan*
Sizzle.
Scene: This is bat country
[More months pass, everything is fine, project is humming along nicely, save a few blips of personality conflicts. Moi takes a vacation. A gas station, somewhere in the middle of Wyoming, a snowstorm, a sports car full of luggage]
*phone rings*
Moi: *looks down, sees it's Robert, eyebrow raises, answer* What's on fire?
Robert: "We had to let Lisa go"
Moi: "Ah, they finally understood each other."
Robert: "Yes..." *deep sigh*
[Fade to flashback]
Bang.
Scene: The office, Lisa's desk
[Daisy and Lisa are discussing non-descript conversation. Daisy broaches the subject of Lisa's past divorce and being a single mother]
Daisy: "It must have been hard, how did you manage?"
Lisa: "I had my daughter, she was my motivation. We made it here, I met my current partner"
Daisy: "That's good! It is so hard, coming to something new. I could never imagine leaving my husband."
Lisa: "He left us, we weren't important, I don't want to marry every again"
Daisy: "Surely you do though? Marriage is great for a woman, my parents found a great husband for me."
Lisa: "Haha, lucky you. Most indian marriage is like prostitution."
[At this moment, Daisy's demeanor takes a nose dive. Whatever was actually said, what she heard was, "Indian marriage is prostitution"]
Daisy: *tears begin pouring down her face, she flings herself back in her chair, head shaking violently she screams* "I AM AN HONORABLE WOMAN!"
[Daisy runs out of the room, straight to HR. Lisa sits there, stunned, not really understanding what just happened or the consequences]
Scene: Back in bat country
[Robert finishes the story, the emotions are a mixture of hilarity at the absurdity of the situation and frustration in the work void it has created]
Moi: "Satan, well. Fuck me. Fuck us. Fuck. Is Daisy alright, is she at least staying? We can't lose two devs at the same time."
Robert: "She got a few days off, she seems fine now, but she's... yeah, I never laughed so hard"
Moi: *double facepalm* "Yeah, the word choice was a bit outrageous. It's not like we didn't know it was coming. I'm going to get back on the road."
Robert: "Alright, enjoy yourself, I'll try and prevent any other forest fires."19 -
At my old job, me and a colleague were tasked with designing a new backup system. It had integrations for database systems, remote file storage and other goodies.
Once we were done, we ran our tests, and sure enough. The files and folder from A were in fact present at B and properly encrypted. So we deployed it.
The next day, after the backup routine had run over night, I got to work and noone was able to log in. They were all puzzled.
I accessed a root account to find the issue. Apparantly, we had made a mistake!
All files on A were present at B... But they were no longer present at A.
We had issued 'move' instead of 'copy' on all the backups. So all of peoples files and even the shared drives have had everything moved to remote storage :D
We spent 4 hours getting everything back in place, starting with the files of the people who were in the office that day.
Boss took it pretty well at least, but not my proudest moment.
*Stay tuned for the story of how I accidentally leaked our Amazon Web Services API key on stack overflow*
/facepalm5 -
That awkward moment when you alter your code to see if it work this new way, and doesn't, and undo does not work. *Weapons grade facepalm*14
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(biggest facepalm moment)
So this happened...
We were suppose to submit a project in the name of app development.
Being our first app, it was a simple Android app having simple features which any e-commerce app would have.
On the day of evaluation, we handed our mobile (which already had our app) to our evaluator, to have a feel of our app.
After few swipes here and there, the evaluator said this,(which blew our mind)...
Don't be so smart,... Here take my IPhone and run your app on it! I want to see if it works on my IPhone like it does on yours or not.
The next thing our group was doing was to look at each other's face,.. completely stunned what to say next!
(If confused, read tags...) :/3 -
Real programmer facepalm-
When you argue with a shopkeeper for giving you an expired product because it was dated six months back according to you! Then in between the argument, you realize it follows different date format i.e. dd/MM/yy.
The moment was a real facepalm. 😶1 -
So my teacher wanted to play a movie cos the class got good test results, and so she asked me how to play a movie on her laptop and get it on the TV and this is how it went down...
Teacher: Sukhi, do you think you could help me.
Me: Yea sure, what do you need help with
Teacher: So I want to play a movie tomorrow but I don't know how to get it up on the TV
Me: Oh its easy just get a HDMI cable and plug your laptop into it.
Teacher: Oh yea I have like 6 of those. Ok then see ya tomorrow.
*The next day*
Teacher: Hey Sukhi, heres the HDMI cable. *Pulls out a AUX cord*
Me: *laughing and crying at the same time*2 -
Ever had that frustrating moment that the customer overreacts a small issue into a big issue? Just happened to me today.
Client: "Hey can you check why we are not getting any software update/patches to our firewall?"
Me: "OK. Lemme check"
** Checking **
Me: "I found that its not getting the latest updates because the license file registered has a product serial # mismatch with their support site. You can see it clearly here..."
Client: "THAT'S TERRIBLE!! QUICK!! MAKE IT A PRIORITY 1 ISSUE AND HAVE IT RESOLVE ASAP!!!"
Me: *Facepalm*1 -
That lovely moment when a client calls out of the blue at 4:30PM (we close at 5), 3 weeks before scheduled launch and says, "My website goes down tomorrow so where are we at with the new site?" So...I scrambled all day today to get the site done and it turns out they don't even own their domain or control their DNS. (facepalm) They put in a 30 day cancellation with their current provider and didn't bother to mention we had barely 2 weeks to develop a full custom site.7
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Facepalm moment - When the boss tasked me with a backend rewrite (or writing a backend in the first place really...) but only looked disappointedly at frontend stuff during the presentation.
"But this looks just like before?"4 -
so... while this may not be *my* code, I do have to claim a fair share of the responsibility for allowing it to exist. o.o
I'm busy fixing it now though.
> note: proprietary names have been blurred, naturally.
3 -
This is the story of the API documentation.
Which btw I couldn't find on the producent's website anywhere. I had the pdf shared with me by a coworker.
I knew the api was fucked up the moment I looked at endpoint documentation.
GET params? WHERE, ORDERBY etc. Literally make a SQL select in a GET request.
Returned stuff? The whole thing. Not some DTO, you literally get everything you can get.
Eg if you get IP in your response, you get it in several formats: dotted form, as hex, and as int. In 3 different json fields.
Oh, and regarding IP - one would imagine you can use masks or prefixes for subnets, right? Nope. The only param you can use there is the subnet size. So you have to calculate the power of 2 every time you want to make a request.
That's from the endpoint documentation. But what about some general info on the API, before all that?
As I was looking for something, I decided to read that intro and general info about the API.
Okay, so there was a change log between API versions. "removed [endpoint which sounds like correct REST design], please use [this generic thing with SQL-like GETs]"... Several of them.
And there was also this sentence which said that the API is not restful, "it's REST-like". <facepalm>
If it was a bad attempt at REST API, I would let it go. But this sentence clearly showed they knew they did everything wrong. And the changelog showed they didn't stop there, they were actively making it worse.1 -
That #facepalm moment when the person you are interviewing has 2 years of experience, rates himself 8/10 in JAVA and doesn't know the difference between abstract class and interface!4
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The moment when you spend over 30 minutes trying to implement that last feature you were tasked with, a mate comes over, comments out your code, writes two lines and you just facepalm at how complicated your solution was.1
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That facepalm moment when you input shutdown now in your own terminal instead of the one in the ssh session.😑3
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I just really want to pluck my eyes out...
My sister is abroad for a music festival where she is attending as a speaker.
Her speech got almost ready at the last moment. The slideshow presentation was sloppy cause she gave some half-assed points to put. I saved the files (PDF and PPT) on her laptop and on her USB stick, I didn't keep any copies for me. She rehearsed her speech and I added some more points to enrich it and fill a bit more time. When she got there, she messaged me if it was possible to add those extra points to the presentation. I asked her to e-mail me the new points and the presentation on time (which it didn't happen), expecting a file attached to the e-mail. And guess what:
SHE FREAKIN' TYPED EVERYTHING EXCEPT OF THE TITLE!!!
AND NOW I HAVE TO REDO THE WHOLE PRESENTATION!!!
I can't facepalm myself hard enough to hop onto another universe...
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