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Search - "opposite of rant"
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Wow this one deserves a rant. Where should I even begin? I got a new job for over half a year now doing work in an agency. We're building websites and online shops with Typo3 and Shopware (not my dream, but hey). All fine you might think BUT...
1) I have been working on the BIGGEST project we have all by myself since I started working at this company. No help, nobody cares.
2) If something goes wrong all the shit falls back to me like "wHy DiDnT yoU WoRk MoRE?". Seriously? How should one dev cover a project that's meant for at least two or three.
3) The project was planned four years ago (YES that's a big fat FOUR) and sat there for 3,5 years - nobody gave a fuck. I got into the company and immediately got the sucky shit project to work on.
4) I was promised some time to get familiar with the projects and tech we use and "pick something I like most to get started". Well that never happened.
5) I was also promised not to talk directly to our customers. Well, each week I was bombarded with insults, a shitload of work and nonsense by our customers because (you guessed it) I was obligated to attend meetings.
6) The scheduled time for a meeting was 30 minutes, sometimes they just went on for over two hours. Fml.
7) Project management. It does not exist. The company is just out to get more and more clients, hires more god damn managers and shit and completely neglects that we might need more devs to get all this crap finished. Nope, they don't care. By the way: this is not like a 200 employee company, it's more like 15 which makes it even sadder to have 4 managers and 3 devs.
8) We don't use trello (or anything to keep track of our "progress"), nobody knows the exact scope of the project, because it was planned FOUR FUCKING YEARS AGO.
9) They planned to use 3 months on this project to get it finished (by the way it's not just an online shop, it has a really sophisticated product configurator with like 20 dependencies). Well, we're double over that time period and it is still not finished.
10) FUCK YOU SHOPWARE
11) The clients are super unsatisfied with our service (who would have guessed). They never received official documents from us (that's why nobody knows the scope), nor did they receive the actual screen design of the shop so we just have to make it up on the go. Of course I mean "I" by "we", because appearently it is my job to develop, design and manage this shit show.
12) My boss regularly throws me in front of the bus by randomly joining meetings with my client telling them the complete opposite of things that we discussed internally (he doesn't know anything about this stupid project)
13) FUCK YOU COLLEAGUES, FUCK YOU COMPANY, FUCK YOU SHOPWARE AND FUCK YOU STUPID CUSTOMERS.
14) Oh btw. the salary sucks ass, it's barely a couple of bucks above minimum wage. Don't ask me why I accepted the offer. I guess it was better than nothing in the meantime.
Boy that feels good. I needed that rant. But hey don't get me wrong. I get that dev jobs can be hard and sucky, but this is beyond stupidity that I can bear. I therefore applied for a dev job in research at a university in my dream country. Nice colleagues, interesting projects, good project management. They accepted me, gave me a good offer and I can happily say that in 6-7 weeks my current company can go fuck themselves (nobody knows the 10.000+ lines of code but me). Just light it up and watch it burn!20 -
(The exact opposite of a rant, yay)
My school gave everyone in my class (and the two other 10th-grade CS classes) these neat 64GB USB sticks.
They are our property (paid by our fee every student has to pay every year so the school can afford paper for the printers, school books, and other materials such as USB sticks for 10th graders), but we have to keep some files for a lesson on the root of the USB (currently ~900MB).
That's not an issue, personal files go in my _Personal folder anyway.
Of course, I wanted to VeraCrypt all my USB drives I use at school, but since I don't have admin rights at our school and they use Windows 10, I just used BitLocker. Good enough, the only thing I want to achieve with encryption is other students being unable to read data off a lost drive (such as my _Personal data)
Also this stick is hella fast even with BitLocker enabled, 200 MB/s (minus 13 MB/s with enabled BitLocker) sequential r/w speed according to CrystalDiskMark.33 -
PHP sucks balls,
It takes forever to do anything, it is so messy it feels like walking through a massive pile of shit!
Ok good I have your attention and that ++ 😇
But no this is not that kind of rant, quite the opposite.
In 70 lines of php shit as some people would call it, I am currently scrapping GitHub pages with ebook collections and with some minor regex pulling PDFs out and saving them to file.29 -
!rant
Quite the opposite of a Rant actually. Very good day today! Had pancakes to start the day, finally got a second monitor for only 5 bucks - it is so much easier to program with live change monitoring!
And, I finally got my very own server rack :) just wanted to share!10 -
I just experienced the opposite of rant.
I spent 1 entire day ranting about a algorithm I couldn't write with no issues, it occupied all my mind and got me pissed of.
And today, I rewrote it entirely, and it works perfectly everywhere.
I was like : "No it can't work here. Oh ok", "And here's the bug ! No ? Nice.", "Don't tell me it'll work here. I'm a God".
That's why I love being a dev :D
Thank you, you freaking problem I had !7 -
!rant, but whatever... At least it brightened my day.
So, I was walking to my school, when I saw a visibly "tired" guy (you know, a lot must've happened yesterday evening / night) walking on the other side of the road in the opposite direction. He crossed the street with the wobble of uncalibrated drone and at that point I knew what is going to happen. Or so I thought.
So we're walking towards each other. At one point he looks at me.
Me: *thinking* "Yep, he saw me. I'm going to be asked for money, am I not? Ugh, I have to think about excuse. Again..."
He: "dude..."
Me: *thinking* "Mmkey, here we go again"
He: "dude, don't do drugs... 'cuz they're bad"
And he walks away.
So, I guess today's lesson is you'll never know when you're going to get friendly advice from random people.4 -
Feature request:
A lot of people have been commenting on rants just to later get notifications about it, but also from my experience often times I comment on a rant but don't want to be subscribed to it.
Why not make it not subscribe you to the rant by default, and instead change the rant mute button to do the opposite and subscribe you to that rant? It would avoid the pointless comments, and this7 -
!rant per se
It’s funny, until junior year of uni I was a strong advocate of Java and was willing to argue the case for it. One thing that I definitely was taught in uni that a language is just a tool (for the most part). It’s the theory that matters, and that can be applied pretty well to most languages. Have come to the point that I actually get frustrated when people get into arguments of language X being shit or inferior to language Y.
Like many people perceive college as a place to just learn programming and stuff like discrete structures and theory as being time wasting, but i have come to realise that it’s quite the opposite, if you know the concept of something, applying it to a language is easier than learning how to do something in a certain language and then bitch and moan that “it can’t be done” in another language you are forced to work with.3 -
Quick tip: ! means NOT. So !rant is a post which isn't a rant. !question doesn't indicate that the post is a question, but rather the opposite (and therefore there isn't really a need for that tag). You might also see something like !!rant which is the same as writing rant (that tag is also unnecessary, considering the name of the app)7
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//rant
So I'm a BI consultant, been doing this for about 6 years now, and I'm pretty good at the data stuffs. Now I had to complete a project for a client where we call a web service and it had to be done in .NET. I wrote a console app in C# that called the WS, dumped the data then a stored proc processed the staging tables into final tables that our visualization tool can consume.
It works, it's done.
Mind you I'm not a pure .NET developer.
And now that it's completed and working this fucking .NET dude that works for my client is basically giving me an attitude talking about "why wasn't it done as a Windows service? Blah, blah" Like WTF!!??? I get that he's the C# BSD but like chill bruh!!
It's annoying as fuck having to work on projects that are not your area of EXPERTISE and then be ridiculed by other elitist assholes about it.
Doesn't happen much, but fuck it's something I hate about dev. FYI, if it was the opposite I would just be asking questions for understanding, not being a sarcastic prick.
//rant done5 -
so... not really a rant because i'm happy to be in the long-term zenlike state where i don't really give a fuck about anything anymore, but...
so today's my birthday (thanks in advance for all the semi-mandatory "cheers" reactions and such)
the agency i do temp jobs through sends money weekly (for the one week back) (which is the main and only reason i use them). they arrive at friday 12:25, so that's when i know to go "check" by withdrawing it, and it's also awesome because it's the best time to provide funds to reward myself (by booze/weed) at the end of the week.
last week, nothing came in. i called them and learned it was due to the contact person in the company i did job in being too late on sending the agency list of people who showed up at the work, i was told it's gonna arrive one week later together with the proper payment for the week-1,so effectively i was one week without any money (literally), but on the next week double was going to arrive, which is nice.
that next week of double was now. i found out that no double arrived, only single-value payment. i called them to ask why.
i was told that what arrived was the late payment, and the dude in company was again late with sending the presence list, so the other payment, for the proper week's work, will be a week late again.
so... that kinda ruined my financial planning tor tge week that's going to happen.
i guess my point (if i have any) is... funny how when someone fucks up, there's nobody for me to be angry at and hold responsible in any way, but when i have delays in my work due to delays upstream, nobody gives a shit about my excuses and it's my fault and i should have compensated, it was my responsibility and duty, and me not doing it (to my own detriment, for someone else) is me failing.
funny how the subjective dynamics of the world always somehow works out in a way where everyone else fucks up and i either have to suck it up and be okay with it otherwise i'm a selfish unreliable entitled asshole, or suck it up and extinguish their fire for them, otherwise i'm a selfish unreliable entitled asshole XD
anyone else noticed this in their life?
how does it work? what is the factor that decides whether you're in the "suck it up" class or the "fuck it, someone else will suck it up" class?
doesn't seem to (just) be the money(flow), i've seen this thing happen even in situations where the money/client dynamics were flowing the opposite way to what would be natural for the shit fall direction.4 -
Let's call this a !rant haha
Yesterday and today are my last days at this company, and for some unexplainable reason, every bug that I've been assigned is been easy to fix, every junit that I've written has passed at the first time!
Damn, best last days ever XD -
!devrant.
More like 'relationship' rant.
The following is gonna be kinda crude and not work appropriate just fyi.
First, whats with this trend of 'shave your pussy", and small tits? Shit just a few years ago it was the opposite! Who wants to fuck a women who looks like an undeveloped boy. Give me a good medium pair of knockers and a (slightly) hairy pussy anyday and I'm in heaven.
On that note, all these guys whining and fucking whinging about "fat" women. Like I'm not chasing deathfat women or anything, but come on dudes. If you're gonna demand 'thin beautiful women' put in the fucking work! Just saying it now. Kinda pudgy, not a deal breaker for me. She have a pretty face, looks good in make up? Fuck it, I'll give her the time of day. Don't come at me with "hurrr...fat is unhealthy! Wheres your standards?"
Wheres YOUR fucking standards? Shit, I could take a 'heavy' girl and in a few months time have her trim. Its about the WORK you put in. All these fucking guys, all these fucking guys man, they all want something for nothing and chicks for free. No one wants to put in the fucking EFFORT anymore. I can't name on one hand the number of 'fat ugly chicks' everyone ignored from school (well except for me), who are now bombshells. If I stayed connected with people maybe I'd be with one of em right now, but I just get tired of this attitude that no one invests any time in others any more. It's all about 'me me me'.
Shes fat, maybe only a few extra pounds? Fat and 'not beautiful'? Fucking DO THE WORK and make her beautiful you bitch! Be her coach, like those fucking instagram couples you see sweating it out. Make her sexy. Become sexy, together.
Get her a fucking treadmill. Get her two. And jog together. Make her *feel* sexy.
More importantly get to *know* her. Why does she get out of bed in the morning? What drive her NOT to get out of bed? When does she feel lousy? What makes her feel that way? In addition to all the other shit men should know how to do, you should learn to play doctor phil, because every girl needs one. Women bond by talking, men bond by doing things together. Relationships should involve both.
Jesus fucking christ, this is basic bitch advice, and it annoys me I keep on coming across these spergs that don't fucking get it. Women are not cars you can stick your key in and just go 'vroom'.
They require maintenance, same as anything, any 'relationship' (because really, what are relationships in 2020, with instagram and fucking tinder and antisocial distancing?). You're a *team*, and i don't mean that in an inspirational way. You're a literal team. And far too many people prioritize the well being and success and concern of 'I' over' 'us'.
In short, if she ain't coming, you shouldn't be either. And if you expect her to on-the-regular put sharp objects on her fucking nether regions, don't expect any blowjobs unless you're doing the same thing for yourself!
Ideally you should be doing it to each other.
After all, you're partners. You trust her to put sharp objects near your groin, right?
Aren't relationships supposed to be about mutual trust?28 -
Recently I started coding a project for my school with two of my friends. The first one is a person which spends most of his time reading 4chan and joking about Pope, you know this kind of person. The second, Michael, is a really good partner for coding, he's just an opposite of Jedrzej, the first one. Jedrzej used to call people 'cancer' and this kind of sh**. Lately Michael said, that he's mother has breast cancer and he left our conversation on Facebook. Later I told Jedrzej, that he has to tell Michael 'sorry', but he wrote something stupid (doesn't matter what) and the situation only went wrong. At least I told them that they have to bury the hatchet and start working. The only problem here is that Michael and I made 99.7% of our project, Jedrzej only updated README and shared his VPS. I'm a full-stack dev, but our project is on laravel and I don't know what kind of sorcery is this framework so Michael does the back-end. My question to all of you who read this rant - what should I do with lazy Jedrzej?7
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!rant
!!rant?
Okay everyone...
So is "!rant" supposed to mean "NOT rant" like I think it is, or is it somehow the opposite of that like half the devRanters using the !rant tag think?
Let's settle this.4 -
!rant
I am learning C# and devRant helps me keep my concentration and attention in check during the day. Helps me stay in the zone longer and interacting with a developer community helps me adopt a mindset which helps me absorb a different way of thinking which is crucial for somebody that comes from an "opposite" field - art and design. I would not have been able to have this community "in real life" otherwise.
+ You guys are soo nice, despite the ranting concept of the app :) -
So, not really a rant. The opposite in fact. With all this frustration about GDPR lately, GUESS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED?! My domains (at one registrar so far) where all made private because of the law. GOOD DAY!2
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this is not a rant.. more like the opposite of rant.. I want to share my overwhelming joy.. that is.. finally receiving my preview for AWS EFS!!!!! I must have applied for this about 8 times! And only today, do I get my prayers answered! Today is going to be a good day! :D2
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[CONCEITED RANT]
I'm frustrated than I'm better tha 99% programmers I ever worked with.
Yes, it might sound so conceited.
I Work mainly with C#/.NET Ecosystem as fullstack dev (so also sql, backend, frontend etc), but I'm also forced to use that abhorrent horror that is js and angular.
I write readable code, I write easy code that works and rarely, RARELY causes any problem, The only fancy stuff I do is using new language features that come up with new C# versions, that in latest version were mostly syntactic sugar to make code shorter/more readable/easier.
People I have ever worked with (lot of) mostly try to overdo, overengineer, overcomplicate code, subdivide into methods when not needed fragmenting code and putting tons of variables.
People only needed me to explain my code when the codebase was huge (200K+ lines mostly written by me) of big so they don't have to spend hours to understand what's going on, or, if the customer requested a new technology to explain such new technology so they don't have to study it (which is perfectly understandable). (for example it happened that I was forced to use Devexpress package because they wanted to port a huge application from .NET 4.5 to .NET 8 and rewriting the whole devexpress logic had a HUGE impact on costs so I explained thoroughly and supported during developement because they didn't knew devexpress).
I don't write genius code or clevel tricks and patterns. My code works, doesn't create memory leaks or slowness and mostly works when doing unit tests at first run. Of course I also put bugs and everything, but that's part of the process.
THe point is that other people makes unreadable code, and when they pass code around you hear rising chaos, people cursing "WTF this even means, why he put that here, what the heck this is even supposed to do", you got the drill. And this happens when I read everyone code too.
But it doesn't happens the opposite. My code is often readable because I do code triple backflips only on personal projects because I don't have to explain anyone and I can learn new things and new coding styles.
Instead, people want to impress at work, and this results in unintelligible, chaotic code, full of bugs and that people can't read. They want to mix in the coolest technologies because they feel their virtual penis growing to showoff that they are latest bleeding edge technology experts and all.
They want to experiment on business code at the expense of all the other poor devils who will have to manage it.
Heck, I even worked with a few Microsoft MVPs.
Those are deadly. They're superfast code throughput people that combine lot of stuff.
THen they leave at you the problems once they leave.
This MVP guy on a big project for paperworks digital acquisiton for a big company did this huge project I got called to work in, which consited in a backend and a frontend web portal, and pushed at all costs to put in the middle another CDN web project and another Identity Server project to both do Caching with the cdn "to make it faster" and identity server for SSO (Single sign on).
We had to deal with gruesome work to deal with browser poor caching management and when he left, the SSO server started to loop after authentication at random intervals and I had to solve that stuff he put in with days of debugging that nasty stuff he did.
People definitely can't code, except me.
They have this "first of the class syndrome" which goes to the extent that their skill allows them to and try to do code backflips when they can't even do code pushups, to put them in a physical exercise parallelism.
And most people is like this. They will deny and won't admit, they believe they're good at it, but in reality they aren't.
There is some genius out there that does revoluitionary code and maybe needs to do horrible code to do amazing stuff, and that's ok. And there is also few people like me, with which you can work and produce great stuff.
I found one colleague like this and we had a $800.000 (yes, 800k) project in .NET Technology, which consisted in the renewal of 56 webservices and 3 web portals and 2 Winforms applications for our country main railway transport system. We worked in 2 on it, with a PM from the railway company.
It was estimated 14 months of work and we took 11 and all was working wonders. We had ton of fun doing it because also their PM was a cool guy and we did an awesome project and codebase was a jewel. The difficult thing you couldn't grasp if you read the code is if you don't know how railway systems work and that's the only difficult thing.
Sight, there people is macking me sick of this job11 -
On science and religion. Inspied by a comment in another rant, credits to @Commodore and @cjbatz
According to Godel's incompletness theorems, aritmetics is incomplete and inconsistent. Therefore, any science based on aritmetics (dude, like, every) is also.
Therfore, as a mathematician, I must accept that there are things that cannot be proven by current science, and that there are statements that are true and false at the same time in current science.
So, science can't prove religious beliefs? It cant prove P vs NP either. It might someday. Science couldn't prove earth wasn't flat for a looong time. Or Pythagoras theorem.
But more importantly, if science can prove something, doesn't mean it can't prove the exact oposite.
This way of thinking allows for any and all ridiculous beliefs, under the shield of "it might be proven one day" or "doent't mean opposite isn't true also" but kerp in mind that there are complete and consistent sciences and proofs in them. Check if something's been proven to exist or not exist without doubt.11 -
I got enrolled in 'extracurricular activity' in second grade of my elementary school. We were playing some games at first, but later teacher started to show us programming and explained the matter very well considering we all were 8 y olds. I got interested and while others would play games I was coding and solved assignments teacher gave us.
My family thought that computer will make me stupid, thinking it was made just for playing games. They promised me to get me the computer if I had highest grades in school. I did, not all of them but tried really hard to be the best, despite that I waited for years and still being close to have aced every subject in the meantime.
I got my first computer when I was 16.
Since that day I was constantly reminded that I am wasting my life away sitting at this stupid box.
Later when I got the job that was well payed, they acknowledged that they were wrong to do that for majority of my life.
My parents are unable to explain what I do at the job as they were never interested in what I really do. "Something with computers" is most common answer you can hear from them.
My parents are non-technical people and they still don't understand how that box works and God forbid that they buy something online. My father even rejects to use smartphone.
They also thought that I'm no college material despite always being in top 5 students of the year (not class, but whole year).
They had other plans for me, but I was aware of that and didn't gave a f00ck about what they want with my life. I knew what I want and that was all exactly opposite of what my parents would like.
I was not the child they wanted, but was good son, even helped them and worked student jobs to pay some bills and to help them financially and still they struggled so hard to find some flaw to my character and decisions just to make their point but more than often failed miserably and just proved how wrong they were and how they don't think anything trough.
Only one who really supported me was my elder sister as she knew I was doing the right thing! She also did it her way and I am proud of her as both of us were dealing with 2 tough customers.
long rant, but wanted to add one more thing, I was never into sport, but was training tae kwon do and was really into it and was decent at it among my peers. When I was going to national competition, on my way out of the house all I got from my parents was: "why are you even going there when you will immediately loose, is it just to travel a bit?"
TL;DR: my family supported me less in my life than worst phone call you had with IT support at your worse ISP!4