When an unreasonable deadline is given.. keep this printout when you go for effort estimation.

When your teach your dad to take printout... Then it happens... LOL 😂😂😂😂💩💩💩

Rebuttal to all these beautiful wiring closet shots. This was taken at my first internship in 2002. As green as I was, I still knew this was awful.

(Pardon the low fidelity; it's a snap of a 14 year old printout!)

A couple of weeks ago, I asked the "brand manager" if he knew how to reset printers to their defaults before reconfiguring them, knowing full well that he did not. He assured me that he did. I smiled and let him leave.

He called me yesterday, frantic, because he didn't know how to reconfigure a printer that already had a password. After reminding him of the above, I told him how to put the printer in diagnostic mode and how to navigate the menus. Literally: "Turn the printer off, then hold down the feed paper button while turning the printer on. It will print out a bunch of diagnostics, and a menu at the bottom. Just follow the instructions at the bottom to use the menu"

Apparently following simple instructions is well outside of his abilities. After he spent five minutes fighting with it and complaining, I called him and walked him through powering the printer on while holding down the feed paper button. Terribly difficult.

The next step amounts to "hold down the feed paper button for more than 1 second." He spent ten minutes (ten!) on this unimaginably challenging step, and, frustrated at his inability to outsmart a simple button, he gave up completely.

He literally couldn't follow the instructions on the printout. I've attached a picture to show how ridiculous this is, and it saddens me terribly to report that I'm quite serious. he was literally unable to figure this out.

HE SPENT TEN MINUTES TRYING TO PUSH A BUTTON FOR >1 SECOND! TEN MINUTES!
That's what was too difficult for him! A button! With written instructions!

I can't even.

But the kicker?
Now he and the bossman want me to drive half an hour so I can push a button for ~1.2 seconds because they're utterly incapable.

I'm soo done.
So. done.

As I joke, I put in the requirement for links to be active on a printout. My developers showed up with QR codes. Touché.

When a client complains about how he can't see the site you just made for him... Because he is looking at a printout... And their printer is out of toner. *sigh*

Client: “I’ve attached a screenshot of the issue.”

The “screenshot” is a printout of the website, with no annotations detailing what the issue is, scanned back in at a 90° rotation and saved as a PDF 😄

My first dev was a small pascal application that my dad used in his job to calculate profitability of their rental machines.

Adding up interests, workshop costs and salaries an finally splitting all shared costs according to each items turnover.

Before this my dad did this by hand using an calculator with a paper printout and it usually took around 3 days with interruptions.

With my application he entered the numbers in a grid like interface and all fixed costs in a settings view and hit calculate. Took around 30 minutes.

And if he got updated figures he just loaded the monthly figures from file, changed as needed and got the new numbers in less than 1-2 minutes instead of starting all over.

This was 1987 and personal computers was just finding its way into business.

I found this old printout of my username and password for my school account from ca 2008. I really like how the password are the same as the username except for some capitalization 😂😅

“sECurItY”

Client once sent me an error as a forwarded email from the scanner of a scanned document of a printout of a screenshot of the problem -_-

...hnnng!

Pretty much right now. I'm seething, just thinking about going to work in a few short hours.

I work for a company that doesn't respect me. A fucking simpleton designer who can do no wrong has changed everything about a project that I'm responsible for, hundreds of times. She gets out a ruler (yes, really), measures stuff against her little mockups (that are also prone to changing without notice), and screams when things don't precisely match her "designs" on every single device she can get her goddamned hands on. She's changed everything except the deadline. I have gotten none of the recognition and all of the blame, and I'm completely over it. This is nothing new. In addition to being a dev team of one, I also found out that I'm the third such person in my company's employ in the last two years, and I've worked here for one.

The final straw was when I was given a schedule for the next project, which I had not been consulted on. It was a printout of an email. Copied in the email was the designer, my boss, and an intern. A FUCKING GOD DAMNED HOURLY INTERN.

Fast forward one week.

I'm in third stage interviews with half a dozen companies right now, second stage interviews with at least that many. When I do get another job, I was originally going to give notice, but I think now I'll just give my boss a printout of an email to the interns and walk out.

Shove the internet up your ass, you fucking fucks

I just found this in my "Religious views" info on FB, thought I would share it even tho it's just a paste from somewhere. Don't slaughter me if this is a reoccuring thing on here😂

THE 0x17'RD PSALM

The Computer is my taskmaster; I need not think.
He maketh me to write flawless reports
He leadeth me with Computer-Aided Instruction
He restoreth my jumbled files
He guideth me through the program with menus.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of
the endless GOTO,
I will fear no error messages;
For thy User's Manual is with me.

Thy disk drive and thy Pac-Man-they comfort me.
Thou displayest a spreadsheet program before me
in the presence of my supervisor.

Thou enableth the printout;
the floor runneth over (with paper).
Surely good jobs and good pay shall follow me
All the days of my life;

And I shall access your CPUs, forever.

Is it okay for someone to printout their own devRant stickers which includes the devRant logo (this :/)?

I am unable to get the stickers on my own. We don't have international shipping/mailing. But I know a local sticker printing shop which can print one for me. And I really one one for me.

paypal, a company that literally makes BILLIONS per year, is going to make mit SIT and WAIT for a meager 1 year CSV transaction report printout

knowing the pile of shit that is corporate america, theyre probably running on some garbage circa 2002 IBM SQL server or some shit

god it truly is a 🤡🌎

Most illogical thing I had to do today.

Today i received an email from bank to fill an attached form to receive payment from a foreign country.

Face palm no 1: The form they sent was in doc format. The layout of the form was all fucked up.

So I downloaded a proper PDF version of the same form from the bank's website.

I filled the form on my computer and signed it using my pen tablet and emailed it back.

Few hours later somone from bank calls me.

Facepalm no 2: He sounded frantic. He asked me to physically mail the "orginal" of the form!

He was thinking I took the printout of the form, filled it by hand and send the scanned copy.

I told him I filled everything digitally so there is no "original" form in physical sense.

Also since I emailed him the form, it doesn't make any sense at all, for me to take the printout of the digital version and mail it to him when he could just open his email and take a print out.

He didn't seem to grasp that idea at all.

Finally, I agreed to go to a branch nearby me and got him speak to an employee there over my phone and they said they will courier the printout to him.

I don't know if the people there are dumb or I am too smart.

To the friend ranting about having to copy pseudo code on paper, I feel your pain. Analog IT professors are the worst.

I raise you one with : I had a professor that had me sent in source code files, a pdf with all the source code and a paper printout of every single line of code for a html/php project. Fifty pages of code printed for reasons I cannot understand. And no, I checked later, he didn't ask for it to take notes during the exam.

favorite item of the moment is the printout tracking my progress through the new taco shop's menu

Office prank I pulled: Halloween party, the office is decorated, and there is a fake spider that I use to scare unwary victims.
Office prank other pulled: a printout picture of the grudge ghost was place in places like, laptop, side of a wall, clinic curtain, etc. That even if Halloween is over there as still some victims..

So let's do a "community building" exercise.

What was your biggest tech pet peeve?

I'll start:
I hate it when people (especially teachers) give us a printout with a link to a website (like a good docs link) without shorting it.

I mean, we have to type out that 100+ character string of random numbers and letters. Then you make a mistake and have to retype it. (I.k,. First world problems)

Let's here yours. It can be about employers, teachers, or anyone else you can think of.

I would definitely recommend EzPrint to anyone who is looking for good service, good quality namecards at super great discounted price ! The person-in-charge was very patient, and asked for relevant information to ensure the best quality printout to our best input contribution. Looking at the incredible, extremely unbelievable LOW price quoted, I felt there must be hidden cost here and there.