Startup: let's improve on our MVP and build an actual website app.

Me: ok.

[go through 2 weeks discovery and planning stage]

Manager1: love working with you. You explain and work in a really professional manner.

[MVP gets built in 2 months, I'm the only dev designer devops throughout]

Manger1: Omg love it! Wait till the other manager sees it. I knew you were right person for the job.

Other users: oo cool. I love features x, y, z.

[two days later shows to Manager2]

Manager2: x doesn't work, feature you is not useful and doesn't work... Hate it. I think we'll move you to another project.

Me: (woah that escalated quickly meme plays in my mind)

Me: [explaining MVP, lean methodology, your internal decision making processes]

...

Manager2: Yeh we want you to not work on any development work (even though those are your skills and extensive knowledge etc) we need you to do admin tasks (that have nothing to do with product or coding etc)

Manager1 and employees: 😲 wtf

Me: I quit

- - -

Now they are struggling in every way possible and don't have enough funds to hire another person close to what they need to help them.

At school in computer class,
Me: (to friend who gets excited from "hacking") Hey look im gonna hack!
Friend: *Turns to watch*
Me: *Does "color a" and "tree"*
Friend: Wow.
Me: *Writes a quick Matrix.bat and opens it*
Friend: Woah guys look he is hacking!!
Me: *Sits there awkwardly*

There are things that i wish i didn't see.

Yesterday, i went to a coffee shop to relax and reviewing my works. And suddenly a college friend of mine approach me and we started talking about work.

Me: So, What do you do at work? What's your stack?
Him: Not much of a new. Still working with wordpress, html,css and jquery.

So he started talking about how cool wordpress is and how he generates money doing sites.

Me: Can i see your sample works?
Him: Sure, *opens his shitty windows laptop with Web Tech stickers*. and handover his laptop to me.
Me: Woah. the design is so neat (I'm lying). But it's freaking slow man(REALLY FVCKING SLOW).

* I decided to open the devTools and inspected the source code. And I can't believe what i saw.

- 20+ images with 2~4mb file size
- 13 unminified javascript files with variable declarations that looks like minified.
- CDN's of bootstrap, foundation and semantic UI
- LOTS OF FVCKING PLUGINS

* I didn't told him what i saw. I just turn over the laptop to him and finish my coffee.

Him: My sites are cool right? I have a lot of pending projects right now. Easy money Bruh!
Me: Wow. *sips* coffee. and say goodbye to him and walkout.

I FEEL BAD FOR HIS CLIENTS!

So I had a fun week.

It started off with my boss replying to a co-workers email where he sent his new bank account, saying he doesn't need it untill we close off some baddly planned projects, meaning no paycheck.

Needless to say we were working night and days including weekends on it and put our best into it.

For the next part I need to explain a little background. We have this old legacy system I'm working with for the past 3 years. I keet raising the red flag we need a new one. Nothing happened. So every time I worked with it I kept thinking how to improve the parts. Almost two years went into thinking and planning the new system untill I got a green light. It was most satisfying - the day I got to build something good and awesome. I drew all the data structures, laid out the foundations and started building ontop of it. It was amazing and I was really proud of it. Then suddendly client wanted to see something and the decision was made we threw it together quickly with the old legacy system. It was on hold 'till then due to work overload.

Boss wrote me this week if I can put the project from git on a server, where he out sourced the completition into India where they will finish it. On thr question if they can't work on git, he replied: "should they?" -.-

To top it all up, I got a notice at the end of the week if I don't fill his shit time tracking system (that takes me one hour/day to insert all entries) by monday he'll deduct a sizable portion of my paycheck.

I AM WORKING FOR YOU ALL THE FUCKING TIME BECAUSE YOU LACK RESOURCES AND I THOUGHT A TEAM STICKS TOGETHER AND SAVES EACH OTHERS ASS! I DONT HAVE TIME TO ENTER YOUR FUCKING STUPID TIME ENTRIES IN YOUR FUCKING BUGGED SYSTEM EACH DAY ON TASKS THAT DON'T EVEN EXIST BITCH! MAKE IT BETTER FIRST!! OH! AND NO ONE IS MORE QUALIFIED TO FINISH THAT PROJECT THAN ME, I POURED MY FUCKING HEART INTO IT YOU PRICK!

woah.

Me: *screwing around in inspect element*

Friend: Woah dude what hacking app is that, can you like turn off the lights

Me: *walks off into the distance*

Me at school: Erh I make programs and I guess it is sort of a hobby
The other kids: SO YOU CAN HACK PEOPLES COMPUTERS AND PHONES??? :0
Me: Not exactly, I actually program websites and some games...
The other kids: WOAH CAN YOU PLEASE MAKE ME A CUSTOM GTA???
Me:

Based on a true story:

Me: Woah, I can't believe you wrote a test for such an edge case, you really take TDD seriously

... 1 minute later

Me: Woah, I can't believe this is the only test for the whole project

TL;DR
I accidentally surpassed(?) my user permissions and closed some of my classmates browsers and locked up a terminal for me

In school we have 2 primary operating systems: Windows and Ubuntu. Windows is hell in general and but not as hell as the firefox installation on Ubuntu.

"Just loaded this page. Now wait half a minute so that I can render it"
"Woah, woah, woah. Slow there. You just made an input event. Give me those 5 seconds to compute what you just did"

Executing "top" or "htop" shows you a long list of firefox processes with a cpu usage of 99.9%, since the whole school shares that linux environment.

Anyway, one day it was way more servere than normally and I way forced to kill my firefox instances. So I pressed CTRL+ALT+T for that terminal, waited 5 minutes until it accepted input typed "killall firefox" with a delay of half a minute per character and smahed that enter key.

At this very point in time I could hear confusion from every corner of the room. "What happened to firefox?"

Around 30% of the opened browsers where abruptly stopped. I looked back to my screen noticed I was logged out. I couldn't login from that terminal for the rest of that day.

Our network admin, which happened to be there, since the server is just next door, said that this was just convenience, but the timing was too perfect so I heighly doubt that.

I felt like a real hackerman even if it was by accident :)

!rant
I don't even care about getting upvotes with rage rants. It's just very nice to have a place where I can out all my rage and anger and where people actually understand me instead of staring at me like 'woah, calm down'. I feel like I'm actually understood here, something I don't often have irl. This is why I f*cking love devRant.

Helping a random junior out with an ML project on an online tutor site.

Her: So what is the syntax for implementing xyz function

Me: *opens Google* *opens pandas docs* *searches the function* *tell her the syntax*

She: Woah thanks a lot!

I collected my tutor fees feeling good about myself.

I once agreed to maintain and develop an application used in a different section of the school to keep inventory and make sure everything is where it is supposed to be.

At first there was enthusiasm, together with 2 of my classmates we agreed and git clone-d the .NET application that now graduated students built and maintained for the past few years. What could go wrong right?!

It became clear that the original students that worked on it followed an older curriculum, meaning they still got taught .NET instead of the core variant that we get now, not only that but it also seemed that they either did not fully grasp the Clean/Onion architecture or didn't get it in class since there were infrastructure components in the 'Domain' project of the solution. Think of 2 DBContexts in the domain model, yep.

One of us bailed in the first week, the other one and I felt bad for the people using the app so we went on and tried to work on the first bugs that were described in a document. One of these bugs was 'whenever I filter on something in the list, everybody gets to see that filter on their screen instead of only me'. Woah that's weird! Let's see how they put that together!

Oh god, they are using a _static_ variable to store filters, no wonder that it doesn't work properly. Ever heard of sessions?!

Second bug: Sometimes people can't create an account when we sign them up from the admin panel. Alright that is weird, let's figure that one out! Wait a second it seems to work in development? What's this about.

Oh wait I can't create an account on production either? Oh that's weird, wait a second... Why do I have to put my e-mail in a form that was sent to me through e-mail? Why is my address not filled in already? OOH, if someone types in the wrong e-mail address (which is easy since our school has 4 variants of the same f*cking e-mail address) it won't work since it can't recognize the user! Brilliant! Remove e-mail input box and make a token/queryparam determine the user account.

Ah that seems good, it's a mess but it seems a tiny bit better now, great! We're making progress and some sweet buck.

Next bug, trillions of 50x errors on random pages, that's a weird one.

Hm everything works in development, that's odd. Is the production data corrupted?

DID I MENTION that in order to get into the system in development we have to load in a f*cking production database backup ON OUR DEVELOPMENT MACHINE and then ask one of the users' password to login to it and create an account for ourselves? Seeding? What's that, right?!

Anyway, back to bug fixing. I e-mail the the people responsible for the app and get a production admin account, oh I also can't ssh into it because of policies so I have to do everything over e-mail and figure out what's causing the errors. I somehow also wonder if they have any kind of virtualization in place, giving students a VM to do that stuff in doesn't seem so weird does it ? Even with school policies?

Oh btw, 'deploying' means sending a .zip file to a guy in another building and telling him how to configure it, apparently this resulted in a missing folder that the application needed to work and couldn't make on its own. This after 2 weeks of e-mailing back and forth.

After 3 months i quit out of despair and sadness, and due to the fact that I just couldn't do it anymore. I separated everything into logical subprojects and let the last guy handle it, he was OK with that and understood why I left.

Luckily, around that time I already had an actual job at a software development company :)

Sometime ago I was introduced to that game "Stardew Valley", as a way to relax and unwind since it is a dynamic-pace simple-storyline and even simpler interactivity open world.
Well, it worked like a charm (sarcasm). I have a save where I am a profit-maxinizing capitalist who tries to score a million gp in an year - so a regular gamer approach. It wasn't the goal here.
So I got a second save where I just go along, getting enough to get by and no hurry to build farm buildings and whatnot, but slowly building up NPC relationships.
Man, what a good metaphor for life. That approach actually unwinds me.

But the dev in me is just like "just, woah! that is an stellar use case for GPT+3 APIs! You could have NPCs with dynamic adaptative dialog! *And* you can monetize it (piracy-proof!) by charging for API calls! No shops, no collectibles, just a unique but scalable experience!"

What is wrong with me? I gotta change into the second-save mindset...

Hi, my name is bohr and I'm a recovering distro hopper.

It all started with Ubuntu, out of my frustrations with the unintuitive nature of DOS I gravitated to a Unix environment which Ubuntu naturally solved. But I quickly became annoyed with the laggy nature of it's daily usage. So I switched to Linux mint. Loving the HTML/css/js configuration aspect of cinnamon I thought it was the answer to all my problems. But I became annoyed with apt and it's lack of a few programs I wanted. This got me to look into an arch based distro, because pacman seemed like the answer to my problems. Unfortunately there are way too many arch distros to use. I experimented with antegros' many DE options: gnome, kde, i3, deepin, openbox... Always finding something wrong. I tried manjaro and it's many flavors, still being annoyed with minute aspects of the os. Out of frustration, with the deep configuration settings I was getting into and the need to actually focus on the work being done on the computer I crawled back to Linux mint. But now my friends, I have decided that maybe it's time to just use a more established distro? Maybe gnome isn't actually that bad? Maybe I need to give it another try? And that is why, I promise, this is the last hop for me. Arch Linux, Gnome here I come and I'm ready to commit this time!...

But have you guys seen POP!_OS? Woah, I bet it would solve all of my problems....

Damn, this delicate 15.6" piece of plastic I call my laptop is the reason I have to tolerate stupid curious college-mates. Whenever I open it, everyone is like woah dude, you are a coder! does it have porn ? or games ?

yeah mann fuck you . its 2018 , I don't play pc games and I can watch porn online . can you fucktards just leave me alone and let me work ?

Why don't we have cheap laptops with good specs but smaller screens? like 7" or 9"

fucking CSE college pervs acting like babies :/

There are few things that annoy me more than an app with unneeded transition animations between menus. An example of this would be the Xbox app on Android. Whenever you navigate to a new menu, it always has a stupid slow fade-in animation. Why do we need an animation every time we switch between menus?! It adds that much more time before we can actually use that section of the app, just because we need to wait for this stupid unneeded animation to run. It's like whoever wrote the app was browsing a generic animation library and discovered the fade-in animation, and thought to themselves "Woah this is so cool, it'll make the app go whooooooosh every time they change menus, they're gonna be so impressed!!"

So my friend texts me with the message, you're smart can you figure it out?

What he sent me was a picture of a post, probably from Facebook which said "skynet is working on making you the next Terminator" with a bunch of bytes following it.

So I decode the first letter using an ascII table and sent it to him, and I get the response WOAH Really!!!

Lol even though it's super simple, it make see feel like 😎.

Protip: Don't use Rider's winform designer. It will glitch out and destroy your work.

And don't use Visual Studio because it will freeze every time you close the application you are debugging.

Actually, just go be a beet farmer.

Hi All !!!

Woah this is my first Post after 3 years not opening this website.
i don't know why.
but maybe between 2017-2020 my live got better so i don't think will have any Rant again.ahahaha *kidding

but today i see email, that i got sticker from devRant, woah i think i will go to devRant again.

wow devRant more cool than before , i don't think this website still open. i just want to check it. i forgot my password too. but luckily still got an access to my email.

So i want to tell a story about this weekly Rant,
Family Support? what the he** is it.
my family only look for money.
at my first job finding, i always pushed for find work in Factory/Oil/Goverment that will give a BIG money.
my first reaction to this i tell i won't do that. but overtime i think i will not talk about it again.
i just want to get Dev Job anywhere.
i don't know if this is the meaning of passion or something like that.
but from the first time , i try hard to get job only is software development.
and hey Maybe my Pray Listened by Almighty God.

so i got my first job as Fullstack developer that luckily accept me as self taught software developer. i don't have any formal education.
actually i only learn software dev from Lynda.com(not promotion) .
i learn algorithm, pseudocode . then i got passed the test of psudocode.

Then because the money is good in there. my parent just accept my first job. not complaining again till now..
maybe this is what they called ikigai??

i love software development so much....

but still i always have a Rant every day about it.
someday you like it, someday you hate it.
someday yo miss it, someday you regret it.

maybe that what is called Love.Damn...

Manager: We gotta new module to develop for our existing product. As I'm leading the team, I'll be involved in designing the module.

Me: Okay.

Manager: *Just after a couple of hours, sends me these lame block diagram which doesn't make any sense*
There you go, this is the complete architecture of the module. Start developing it.

Me: *Woah!!* 😵

1)not thinking too much.
Seriously, my mind is way too stupid to sit idle and relax. In my mind, Somewhere there is a thought about an incomplete project, somewhere there is a startup idea, somewhere there is a fear of an incomplete assignment, while somewhere there is a sad song playing.. and out of nowhere, there comes my beautiful crush and me kissing, and woah, am now doing bhangra and round and rounds of shotz with her, whoops whoops whoops go back, bro , go fucking back to your work :|

(After 5 minutes...)
"whats going on devrant now?, whats goin on insta now, has she repied on whatsapp? what she eating? hey!, i could make an app for....

And this cycle goes on....

Me and a couple of friends have this group on WhatsApp where we can share stuff that we do and maybe come up with new stuff to work on as well.

For giggles (honestly irritating to me) I'm gonna summarize some conversations on the group.

26/11
Me: Finally completed my first FPGA program, these devices are amazjng!
NO REPLY

28/11
Me: gonna make the Jacobs ladder thing today! Hope I don't get zapped
Anyone interested ?
NO REPLY

29/11
Me: hey here's a nice electronic circuit, try to analyze how this circuit oscillates (we're all ec 'engineers' well... soon at least)
NO REPLY

2/12
Friend: Guys creed 2 was amazing I don't mind watching it twice
F2 : Really? Why don't we go soon?
F3 : I'm in!!! What's the plan
F4 : how about tomorrow ?
....

3/12
F1 : Guys anyone have notes for X exam
F2 : here. {Link}
F3 : here. {Link}
F4 : how many of you are done ?
F5 : what are the important questions
(just a stupid aptitude test)

{Me} changes group title from X to Notes group

Let's give this another shot
6/12
Me: There's a conference on X technology by Y industry leader ..
Should we check it out ?
There's even a workshop on X
NO REPLY

Alright time to acknowledge my stupidity and my lack of brains for even belonging to this kind of social circle/COUNTRY

7/12
ME: New fortnite season is out
F1: woah it's crazy let's play
F2: already on it, client is updating
F3: are you shitting me? gonna get BROS laptop (i'm going to suck my brothers cock and take his computer)
F4: Hang on bro wait for me also call me on discord.

I hope you guys could stick through that. Well there's no crazy moral to this but if you're one of these guys just appreciate your friend for his efforts once in a while even at the cost of acknowledging your stupidity.

Also, words like BRO are instant triggers and I'll make sure I find you can kill you if you use it more than once every couple of sentences ( I have relatively high tolerance )

fallacy of a "good child". m:mom/dad s:son/daughter , o: outcome.

counter : 1
m : Son, can you do this thing x for me?
s : yes sure
o : son is good

counter : 2
m : Son, can you do this thing x for me?
s : yes sure, give me 5 mins
after 5 mins...
--case 1 : m is still waiting, s comes and does the work
---o : son is bad since son let m wait
--case 2 : m did half of x and says "just teach me how this part is done, and i will do it on my own". s teaches
---o : son is bad since son didnot do the task
--case 3 : m does the whole x work
---o : son is bad since son did not do the task

counter 3
m : Son, can you do this thing x for me?
case 1)s : why can't you do it yourself? i taught you last time?
--- o : son is bad
case 2) yes give me 5 mins
---o : same as cases of counter 2, i.e all are bad

counter : misc
m : why didn't you do x for me beforehand? why do i need to tell you everytime?
case 1 s : woah! when did you say to do it each day?
--- o1 : son is bad since he cross questioned
case 2 s : oh am sorry, i forgot
--- o2 : son is bad as he intentionally forgets

----

am i not seeing enough politics in the office each day to handle another black tag on me? i sometimes delay a task assigned to me, sometimes want other to just understand and do it on their own. but why does it always end up making me a bad offspring?

So at my school, the first 10 minutes of school is like when we can do whatever we want. Earlier in the morning i had been making a nodejs password manager thing just so i could try some things out. It also used bash so i could make it like a cli. I was debugging because my database viewer said that the table was empty but for whatever reason it still worked when i put things in it. So i had the db viewer open and terminal open and the teacher comes along."Woah are you like hacking a server" he said. Everybody around me started staring at me. I told him no im not. A couple minutes later he comes around again. The db viewer was closed and i was just in terminal trying to see if some changes worked. He said "Is this like the matrix or something???". I remembered i had a cmatrix package thing installed. I ran it. W O A H everybody around we was like. Luckily most people knew that
1. It wasnt hacking
2. I dont do hacking
3. I was doing it as a joke.
Although he must of been thinking that i was like a hardcore hacker in his class. Was weird and funny.

Think of an awesome sounding AI project while not knowing a thing about AI.
Tell the guy you will be working with that you will manage to keep the learning pace up (he doesn't know AI as well, woah!)
Fast forward 2 weeks - completely forget about how I wanted to do anything with AI.
Fast forward 1 week - that guy messages me that we ought to do a meeting to check how much each of us have learned and to decide on how we will tackle the project.
Somehow managed to get the deadline to be day after tomorrow.

'I am screwed...' is what I think when I skim through pages of 'Artificial Intelligence a Modern Approach'. So, I put down the book and try to find something easy to understand on youtube. I find a hyperactive looking guy that under a video titled along the lines of '5mins and you are linear gradient pro'. Not suscipious at all.
Watched video twice, managed to understand that I need calculus for this shit. Oh well.

AI seems so much fun until you understand that it requires a fuckload of knowledge to do anything at all! :'(

Going to try to analyse linear gradient until tomorrow and hope that it will be sufficient for our project.
Lol. Who am I kidding?

I'm making a booklet of some handy notes. So, the old trick is print in pages of 4, to make binding easier. I spool about 60 of those and then it starts printing in my manual duplex until
*a wild blank line has been spotted*
`wat?`
I go back and see that I've not noticed a trail of white blanks that had been slowly creepily increasing in the print space where the text should be. Almost 20 of my pages are wasted. I take out the print cartridge and wipe the drum, run the cleaning sequence on a clean sheet and try to print.

Presto! good as new!

Sippin some coffee, browsing the web.. oh and woah! The blank reappears and it is now bigger. The previous 12 pages are not affected? wth

I do this whole thing again. Wipe and print. It works. And along the lines of 15 or so prints, the blank appears again, bigger and bolder. wth. I really need those prints now.

If it was broken, I'd have fixed it in the afternoon, but it is evening now. No one opens at this hour. Why is y printer fucking with me?