Dear designer, if you're generating assets please make sure you're naming them right. And oh, get rid of that .DS_Store thing please.

Found this in a library today while trying to debug it... I want to murder some devs right now.

Do you ever have those weeks where you have to fix a bug, then uncover another bug then another then another. Then you realise some functionality is completely missing. You write tests to cover your bug fixes and new functionality. Then you realise tests are broken with your fixes and you have no idea why. Then you get so frustrated you start making silly mistakes. Then your debugger starts playing up.... Yeah that's been my week.

Everywhere you go, you find these memes where developers are skeptical of their work. Things like "It works. I don't know how. It doesn't work. I don't know how.". Don't you guys think this is a huge problem? And people say that their programming language is the best, because preference. But isn't this happening because our tools suck?

Yes the problems maybe inherently complex but at least we should be able to figure out the logic behind the snipper and reason about it.

Haven't really experienced it, but they say Haskell and the likes are great at this and it must be true because it's backed by mathematical properties and laws, not " experience".

So the rant here is, wish we had better tools in the mainstream that allowed us to enjoy absolute faith in at least what we have written, regardless of the fact that we understood the problem in the domain.

How for loop works

*explains the importance of official docs*

*moments later, the intern pointing at his screen to a crappy YouTube tutorial video*

Intern: How did he figure all this stuff out? He must be a genius.

Modify the front-end code and noting change.

Empty the cache... ✔️ not work
Check xampp open... ✔️ not work
Check my sass compile... ✔️ not work
Compile vuejs webpack... ✔️ not work
Check my laravel route... ✔️ not work
Check with Xdebug... ✔️ not work

Go get coffee... ✔️Not work

See the url on stagging.<website>.ca in my browser ❌

😲🙄😅 Holy fucking retard i am...

Drinking game:
Everytime you see a typo in the commit message, take a shot.

Meta devRant rant:
Everyday there's a rant that reads, "I don't care what others think but I love me some PHP because all the $ gets me $$$, it just works™!"

@bhargav-mogra This is Kotlin for you. In response to your rant about Swift ranges.

Yet another day at my company, Im rewriting some old code for client (rewriting old, php 4 system for vindications managment) and you know the moment when you are focused and someone comes to you to absolutely ruin your focus. Fine, whatever. Oh, for fuck sake. Again dev is doing as support becouse one moron with second can't login into zimbra admin panel and add fucking mailbox. I show them exacly how they login, remind them they are admins too, slowly show them, so you click "manage" than you click that gear icon and than you click "new", fill in email address and password. As simple as 1-2-3. Okay, fuck it, time to go for a cig. I just finish up few lines and stand, grab my vape and start walking towards door. In door I find my buddy with 2 random people. He told me that they are interns and that I should show them some basics and stuff around that. Oh god, fuck my life. If anything, Im definitely very bad teacher, mainly becouse I often have problems with saying what I mean in the way that somebody actually understans and knows what I am trying to say. Whatever. Fuck it all. I grab two of our old laptops that nobody used in like a year or so, and first thing I quickly figure out, is that one day for some what the fuck reason I dont even dont bothered to remember I installed Arch on both while I dont usually use Arch. I just needed it for some specific reason. Whatever. So I guess I will need to upgrade fucking system. Our network isn't really great so that was like... hour or so. In the meantime I figured what they know about coding in general etc, and holly shit. One of them (there was boy and girl), girl, apparently never ever in her life even touched code. Well... fuck. Why am I wasting my time? Becouse there was some programme or some shit like that... Someone could tell me before so I could mentally prepare.. fuck it. whatever. So while laptops are doing their pacman thing, I sit with them and slowly start to explain based on my machine some really basic concepts. Second guy actually had some expirience, he knew how to make some really really basic logic and stuff, so he had another world of problems, becouse it was PHP and, as we all know, everyone hates PHP, and... yeah.. You can probably imagine his approach. Yes, you get user input in super global array. I really wanted to say "Now shut the fuck up and write that fucking $_POST".

hour or so passed, I was close to giving up to not let my anger rise (im not really good teacher... I mentioned it. I suck at teaching others) but luckly machines upgraded. He wanted to use visual studio code, she didnt care too much, so I installed phpstorm in trial mode. whatever. Since that's linux and they were not comfortable with that, I walked them through installing LAMP stack, and when finally it started to look like LAMP stack, I requested them to google how to install xdebug, becouse xdebug is very usefull and googling skill is your best weapon on that field. I go for cig, come back and what I see boiled me a little bit. The girl was stuck looking at github page randomly looking through xdebug source code and idk... hoping for miracle (she admited she thought there will be instructions somewhere) and the guy was in good place, xdebug has a place to paste your phpinfo() for custom instructions. But it didn't work for him, he claims that wizzard told him it cant help him.. hmm intresting, you are sure you pasted in phpinfo? yes, he is sure. Okay, show me.

Again mindblown how someone can have problems with reading.

so his phpinfo() looked like that:
```<?php
phpinfo();```

I highlighted on the page the words "output of phpinfo". He somehow didn't see it or something. He didnt know, he thought that he needs to put in phpinfo so he did. OMG.

Finally, I figured out I can workaround my intern problem, and I just briefly shown them php.net, how documentation looks, said to allways google in english, if he uses tutorial to read whole fucking thing, not just some parts of it, and left them with simple task, that took them whole day and at which they ultimately failed.

To make 3 buttons labeled "1" "2" "3" and if someone presses one of them, remember in session that they pressed it and disallow pressing other ones.

Never fucking again interns. Especially those who randomly without apparent reason almost literally just spawn in front of you and here, its your fucking problem now.

Fuck it, I have some time to get back to my stuff. Time is running so lets not waste it.

After around 15 minutes my one of my superiors comes in and asks me if I can go on meeting with him and other superior. My buddy goes with us, and next 3 hours I was basically explaining that you cannot do some things (ie. know XYZ happened without any source of information) in code, and I can't listen for callbacks from ABC becouse it wont send anyc cuz in their fucking brilliant idea ABC can't even know that this script would even exist, not to mention it wants callbacks.

Sometimes I hate my job.

I once found a bug that I couldn't figure out from the code, so I started putting log statements that would print out the variables on screen (yes I have xDebug, but old habits die hard). Then the entire website didn't load anymore and eventually the entire container crashed.

It took me an hour to realize I was trying to var_dump an object from the ORM, resulting in a memory overload since there were like 20 related objects that recursively tried to load all the data in the database.

In my defense, it was friday afternoon...

[
'!rant Today I traded xdebug for test coverage with pcov, my god this is so much quicker now!',

'My mysql development container would not start because the password was too long, what even... Not a clear error or anything, it just wouldnt let anything else connect',

'!rant This week I have suddenly become motivated to functionally test the shit out of my projects, it feels SOOO good',
]

Anybody else that low-key hates step debugging async code in nodejs ?

Miss the simplicity of synchronously execution flow… Like debugging php with xdebug ☺️

These god damn idiots!11!!

Why, for duck sake, php-fpm and xdebug are using the same standard port 9000?

There are thousands of different ducking ports you could choose from!

So each developer who wants to debug his php app served by php-fpm, has to adjust the port for xdebug on something like 9001 or 10000.

Whyyyyyyyyyyyyy!?!??

: /

Nearly strangled a fellow dev after finding out he refuses to use xdebug and litters his code with `die()`statements instead

Typo3.

Especially when it comes to debugging third party (usually outsourced) plugins and implantations..
It's daz vile wild west over there, you never know where something is defined, but more often that not, some obscure TypoScript file.

Never have i been so grateful for xdebug & grep / awk combined with regular expressions..

Do you ever have days where you get absolutely nothing done, because of a local environment problem. My xdebug would break on break points but once you stepped to the next breakpoint it would halt execution of the code... It worked fine yesterday!!!!! Arghhh

CamanJS is a nice library and such but why does it's vignette function take a String as it's parameter for percentage!? It parses it by removing the '%' character and doing a parseInt()!

So far in my new job, a colleague that refuses to use Xdebug and contractors that don't document anything they do.

"XDebug is like the SELinux of PHP."

-"I know right? It's the thing you always have to disable when something weirds out."

- random dudes on the train home

/r/programming

How do you deal with people who stare at your screen?

So I´m still working on that Sync to get rid of this abomination called Wrike.

Now I have a problem.

To be able to sync mantis with our software I need to be able to create projects in mantis through the API.
No problem.
But then again, I need to link custom fields to that just created project.
The mantis API apparently doesn´t have that.

I now have two options:
1. I expose the custom field functions myself on the REST api.

2. I gain direct access to the mysql database and do it within my sync job in the database.

Well I´m not a web developer. Like, at all.
But I thought: Hey how hard can it be?
So I got an Apache server with php, mysql and XDebug running with VSCode.
Works better than expected.

But now that I have actually seen the mantis code, I´m seriously considering number 2 again...

Fucking php...

Visual Studio Code and xdebug: my saviors to finally not have to put up with NuSphere PhpEd constantly shitting itself over memory limit issues in my 3,704 file PHP project.

About ready to murder Xdebug...debugging an issue on a Drupal site and the debugger catches fine if I set a breakpoint in index.php, but breakpoints in any other file do not catch, even though die statements show that code is being executed where the breakpoint is set.

One of those debugging days where minutes feel like hours, and hours like days.

I had the bad luck of being asked to dive into a legacy project which was unmaintained for months, but of course it's still on prod. And very suddenly the urgent need arrises to change stuff.

Yet: the docker stack won't work. It builds fine but the stack crashes.

Long story short: some internal api URI were renamed and at some point one internal api started to always require an access token. Which we set for the stage, prod env yet somebody forgot to mention that to the devs of legacy-project.

That ain't too bad.

WHAT IS FUCKING BAD IS THAT YOUR SHITTY APP SWALLOWS THE ERROR MESSAGE!

I mean it's bad enough I have to `var_dump && die` your app since you never bothered to setup a xdebug that I could use out of the box, yet egregious fact that your app would catch a valid exception but transforms it into an "internal warning" is borderline insane!

It's ok to throw exceptions. It's ok to let your service die. That's how other will know what and where to fix it. (You may want to restrict the data visible to the outside, but that's a whole different conversation.)

PHP should have another error. E_XDEBUG_IS_ACTIVATED. That way I wouldn't have spent weeks trying to figure out why my server was slow as shit.
What a piece of crap debugger. IDE integration is not worth the time overhead. I wish I had known phpdbg was a thing.

Not being able to lol at "Monad is a monoid in the category of endofunctors." joke even after several readings of articles/guides online.

Assured the boss that the app will be ready in minutes and only a simple callback implementation is yet to be made. Immediately discovered that the library is inconsistent with the docs and only thing possible is to file an issue. Way to go Facebook Fresco!

I just want to test my PHP code using phpunit on GitLab, what am I doing wrong?

image: php:latest

before_script:
# Install & enable Xdebug for code coverage reports
- pecl install xdebug
- docker-php-ext-enable xdebug

# Run our tests
# If Xdebug was installed you can generate a coverage report and see code coverage metrics.
test:
script:
- phpunit Test.php

Most painful code!!
Well , it was to write a code in 'C' which will print first N times prime numbers. As a noob , it was really very painful.