I'm debugging a script...

It takes 1+ minute to start because it loads data from remote API and apparently loading 80k objects takes a lot of time, even though I need only headers

I could optimize it. Like, add a local cache. But I will not.

Instead I will waste 1 minute, then another minute, then another minute, each time hoping it's the last pass, but no. I will waste the whole day on it and at the end of the day I will still NOT have the slightest idea why it is slow. That is what will happen, I predict it.

Good times

stack overflow roasts..
mannn they are brutal !!!

Today I remembered why I don’t “wing” things.

Anyway, here’s my cat in a cardboard tank.

Statements related.

i work on a music streaming app.

bug: playlist description shows there are X songs inside. But when you go inside it says there are Y songs in the list. the list actually containing Y songs.

hack: when a user goes in, cache Y and display it outside in the description next time.

result: user sees X songs in playlist description, goes in playlist and sees Y songs. goes back to check why it said X before but now it doesnt say X anymore coz we cached Y and display that in the description from now on so the user assumes they are imagining things

LinkedIn: Are you finding difficult to socialize while wearing mask? Here some tips for...

Me: Just shut up! I am enjoying this

Shout out to our HR manager who doesn't accept sick leaves if it's "just a migraine" or "just a stomach ache"

A girl just canceled our first date to watch Avenger's Endgame with her friends. Pres ++ to pay respects.

Casually Client Team Asked A Developer Team,
What is your favorite game?

**Blame Game**, One of the junior developer murmured.

*Asks Question on StackOverflow
*Question get downvoted -2
*Replies to my own question with a solution that I found, and it worked
*Reply get downvoted -4

Cries on corner...

Manager (walking in in the morning): ey linuxxx, looking good today!
Me: w-what? I'm not wearing much special, what's so great about my outfit? But than....
Boss: April fools motherfucker!

Well, I had it coming .______.

My first ever salary made with coding came yesterday! 🎁

Me: Lets build and test my app!
Compiler: WTF is "onLick" ???

*cries in corner*

I was talking with a PHP dev. He was also fan of Hellreiser as I am.

We were bored and I sugested to design a “Php superhero” or something like that. He propoused “Php man: Once the page loads, he can’t do anything”. Then, I draw this: A Php cenobite. (Cenobite: Like an interdimentional sado monster)

Yes, the php dev is the same guy of the php thong from my last rant 😂

Participated in Smart India Hackathon 2019 Software edition and won 2nd prize :)

now we know

(Made by a classmate but liked it so sharing it here)

This was my first freelancer project. Just dropped out of school, i think i was 17. No money, no proper hardware, i had a very old laptop & stolen wifi from our neighbor. I lived in a very small room at my mom’s flat, she wanted me out as soon as i turn 18. At the time my plan was to work on freelancer stuff and make my own games. “It will be fine, fuck school, who needs school? 😂“ I haven’t really finished anything back then, so i only had a few wip hobby projects to show ppl as my references. I saw a freelancer job posting. The task was to make a simple quiz game for mobile, it paid 350$. Back then that was a lot of money for me so i took it. I met the client, he said “2-3 week tops, i send you everything, you do the code” Cool. I finally had a “job”😃. The 2-3 weeks turned into a 8 month blur of all-nighting and just implement one more thing and its finished. I did not really have any experience on how to deal with clients and i really needed this project to finally have something on my porfolio. I motivated myself with “if i can finish this i can finish anything”. I think the story of my most definitive all-nighting was 3 months into the development. I finally got everything from the client so it was like just put it together and its done. The client wanted 300 levels, beeing a noob i was i started making all the 300 unity scenes by hand, aligning the pictures, the ui, testing each level, making adjustments to the code, etc.. after a really long night and a fuckton of caffeine i was done. I sent it to the client at around 9 am and gone to sleep. When i woke up i checked my emails to saw this: Cool! But can we do hints? (wich needed a fuckton of rework of my code) I think i had my first mental breakdown while working on the project. After that he wanted more modifications and because i made every level by hand i had to remake all of them like 10 times 😂
But in the end it turned out positive, he really helped me to start my carrier, we became sord of friends and the project gave me a lot of confidence and experience on how to deal with stuff when shit goes wrong because everything that can go wrong in a project gone wrong. It was the most valuable developer lesson. Plus it sounds so cool to say “i was born in development hell, b*tch!”🕶
I attached a pic of the laptop i worked on 😂
Thanks for reading 😃

Every code error search ever

I just realized our business runs on a WIMP stack :(

Windows, IIS, MySQL, PHP

(a=>a.bind(0,a))((f,n,s,a)=>a?a[0]?s:f.bind(0,f,0,(s?s:"")+String.fromCharCode(n)):f.bind(0,f,n+1,s))()``()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()``()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()``()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()``()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()``()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()``()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()``()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()``()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()``()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()``()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()``()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()``()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()``()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()```'`

Levels of tech awareness:

0: Doesnt use tech at all
1: Uses tech only for work
2: Uses it for films/gaming
3: Has alexa/google home
4: Uses smart home system
5: Has a loaded shotgun under the pillow, which is used to shoot the only piece of tech in the house (a printer from 2004) when it makes an unexpected noise!

Well, you wanted to chat...

You know this is you everytime...

He is the real one! Programming is life!

GPU: *exists*
TensorFlow:

Me and buddy are learning some new stuff

Let me share a piece of advice to entry level devs that are getting ready for job interviews that I wish someone gave to me when I was first looking for work straight out of school. Do not focus making yourself look good to this company by trying to make your resume flashy or trying to oversell yourself. Although its important to present yourself sure, but it should not be the foundation for you to base your interview goals around. Rather focus on the company itself. Find out whether the company itself uses modern technology,practices and upholds to project management and the software development cycle, find out how they work,communicate and develop as a team. Simply put focus on whether they are worth working for instead of looking like your worth being hired. Can they collaborate,communicate and solve problems efficiently. Otherwise you may end up getting hired and hating your job. Just a thought and some advice on my own experiences. Hope it helps someone.

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

We need more of this

Dont you fucking tell me what to do