Details
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AboutJust an 18 year old kid wanting to learn more about technology.
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SkillsHTML, CSS, light Java and PHP
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LocationDetroit, MI (please send help)
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Website
Joined devRant on 3/8/2017
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"The most important skill in life is mitigating frustrations, but please don't get good at it — your suffering is hilarious"
— Girlfriend, while I was trying to fix her CPU cooler.
I realized immediately she just explained why this community exists.7 -
HTML: Hate This Meaningless Life
CSS: Can't Style Shit
JS: Just Shit
Java: Just another vicious asshole
PHP: PHP Hates People
Go: (the "fuck yourself" is silent)
.NET: Now Everybody Thinks (they can code)
I really should find a more productive thing to do on my breaks.19 -
A client’s server crashed so they called us. When we checked the logs we found a user was logged in 200,000+ times. We told them the user and a few minutes later we get a picture of a cupcake that was on the enter key. They got cupcake DOS attacked. My team isn’t in charge of the login functionality but I can say the team that is got a fairly aggressive internal support ticket.5
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25 phrases you wish you could say at work more often
(Warning: Contains naughty words...:-)))
1. Ahhh...I see the fuck-up fairy has visited us again...
2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
3. How about never? Is never good for you?
4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.
10. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.
11. I like you. You remind me of me when I was young and stupid.
12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.
14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
17. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
19. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
21. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
23. No, my powers can only be used for good.
24. You sound reasonable... Time to up the medication.
25. Who me? I just wander from room to room17 -
Just watched a video where someone (in relation to the new mass surveillance law in the netherlands) asked people on the street if they had something to hide.
Everyone said no.
"Could you get your phone and show me around?"
Everyone said yes.
"May I take a look at your messages/pictures/browsing history?"
Suddenly 80 percent said no.
"But you said you had nothing to hide!"
"I'm going to take that back."44 -
Pro tip:
Although 'hmm either kill it or if that doesn't work, sacrifice some of its children' is a perfectly valid sentence in the sysadmin world, it's not in public.
😅10 -
Aint a rant, but pulsar player has the best fucking implementation of the material design ive ever seen, everything is perfectly flat and still alive aaah4
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I'm sure we've all seen a rain binary cloud picture like this. But have you seen one that fits your mood? 🤔🤔18
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De-google your life
Search:
-qwant
-startpage
-searx
-duck duck go look up the founder
-yandex (putin botnet)
Mail
-cock.li
-ProtonMail
-Posteo
-Tutanota
-your own
Browsers
-https://kek.gg/i/3g2z6d.png (superior list)
-https://kek.gg/i/67YQQx.jpg (for furfags)
-https://wiki.installgentoo.com/inde...
/Web_browsers
Collaborative documents
-quip
-turtl
-ether pad (eg: notes.typo3.org or etherpad.net)
-microsoft office online (lol)
Image Upload/Edit
-kek.gg
Video sharing
-hooktube
-bitchute.com
-vid.me
-dtube.video
Social
-gnu social (for freedom loving patriots)
-mastodon (for proprietary loving gook pedos and sjws)
-gab.ai
-minds
-diaspora
Image Upload/Edit
-kek.gg
Google CDN avoidance
-Decentraleyes
Ad and script blocking
-uBlock Origin
Share links without gibbing clicks
-archive.is
Android
-droid-break.info
How to hosts file (lol, just block google bro):
-https://archive.is/gBJ8i
Reading:
-https://wiki.installgentoo.com/inde...
/Anonymizing_yourself#Fingerprinting
-https://wiki.installgentoo.com/inde...
/Firefox#Notable_add-ons
-https://panopticlick.eff.org77 -
Tutanota (encrypted email service) has a newly designed interface.
I usually don't give a crap about design.
It's so beautiful 😍
I think I'm in love 😱44 -
Q: How did you get into artificial intelligence?
A: I don't know it seemed logical -- I couldn't find any real intelligence3 -
Will the bug in my code please stand up?
I repeat
Will the bug in my code please stand up?
I think we have a problem here.
*music intensifies*11 -
So here's the new hotness... HP Envy X360.
I7
32 GB RAM
512 Gb SSD
1 TB HDD
Blows my old MacBook Pro away.56