OMG I have no clue why they're leaving
- Every asshole manager ever

We need a stackoverflow for girlfriends....

1970-01-01T00:00:00Z 😂😂

Hurr Durr JS sucks because X. Wew lad I'm a cool kid now.

A little while ago, the concierge of my apartment building came to me about some issue with the central heating system. Totally unaware about the issue, I let him check some things in the apartment. Then he told me that apparently my thermostat has been turned off all the time. So I think that my servers may very well have been the primary source of heat for this apartment for several weeks. Servers, the new type of central heating system that even does useful work in the process!! Can we get some wanketeers on this to make it a product? 🙃

A nice shirt for Halloween

Don't know if this has already been put up, but I got a good laugh from it

Have you ever heard the story of the first bug in software development?
The first documented bug was actually a bug. There was a moth trapped inside the computer causing the bugs.

source: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/...

Desk setup :3

10/10 marketing, tbh

Bad ping will get ya!

"Copying one person is stealing. Copying ten is research." - Chet Atkins

When you spend 4 hours writing that algo, then spend the same amount of time to celebrate

'nuff said

Random post on linkedin...

"Jack of all trades, master of none"

Being a generalist does not make you a master of none.

You are at a position to apply your diverse yet relevant experiences into a singular objective. This makes you strategic and holistic.

A jack of all trades, a master of integration.

Ok, now I can go to bed.

At work, everytime someone finds a piece of code (their own or someone else's) that couldn't possibly have ever worked, we draw a line. Obviously preceded by finding out who wrote said code.

Two days ago...

I was happy, building out the network in a new lokation.

Suddenly my phone just doesn't want to stop ringing, from all the other lokation calling in that they can't connect to HQ.
Then HQ calls, we don't have internet, nothing works. The one guy on location who has access to the server room enters and finds all the servers offline and a couple of breakers blown.
Turn on breakers, servers won't boot properly.
Me in a taxi and hurry to HQ, to help boot the servers.

Afterwards I find out that one of the bosses spilled a cup of coffee on his desk, shorting the circuit.
Apparently he is on the same breaker group as the servers!?! What the actual fuck!

At least now the other bosses are like; yeah, we need to do something about that

Nothing stops you from experimenting out like a highly stable system. Never let stability become a plateau.

Login :
Username - admin
Password - admin

Some empty-headed helpdesk girl skipped into our office yesterday afternoon, despite the big scary warning signs glued to the door.

"Hey, when I log in on my phone, the menu is looking weird"

"Uh... look at my beard"

"What"

"Just look at this beard!"

"Uh.... OK"

"Does this look like a perfectly groomed beard"

"Uh... it's pretty nice I guess"

"You don't have to lie"

She looks puzzled: "OK... maybe it could use a little trimming. Uh... a lot of trimming". "I still like it though" she adds, trying hard to be polite.

"I understand you just started working here. But the beard... the beard should make it clear. See the office opposite to this one?"

"Yeah"

"Perfectly groomed ginger beards. It's all stylish shawls and smiles and spinach smoothies. Those people are known as frontend developers, they care about pixels and menus. Now look at my beard. It is dark and wild, it has some gray stress hairs, and if you take a deep breath it smells like dust and cognac mixed with the tears caused by failed deploys. Nothing personal, but I don't give a fuck what a menu looks like on your phone."

She looked around, and noticed the other 2 tired looking guys with unshaven hobo chins. To her credit, she pointed at the woman in the corner: "What about her, she doesn't seem to have a beard"

Yulia, 1.9m long muscled database admin from Ukraine, lets out a heavy sigh. "I do not know you well enough yet to show you where I grow my unkempt graying hairs... . Now get lost divchyna."

Helpdesk girl leaves the scene.

Joanna, machine learning dev, walks in: "I saw a confused blonde lost in the hallway, did you give her the beard speech?"

"Yeah" -- couldn't hold back a giggle -- "haha now she'll come to you"

Joanna: "No I already took care of it"

"How?"

"She started about some stupid menu, so I just told her to smell my cup". Joanna, functional alcoholic, is holding her 4pm Irish coffee. "I think this living up to our stereotype tactic is working, because the girl laughed and nodded like she understood, and ran off to the design department"

Me: "I do miss shaving though"

Wireshark 😂

Anyone else experienced that the not responding apps come back to life when you're about to open Task Manager or you've opened it already? I suspect they get scared of their god.

Implementing the application exactly like the client specified, because they won't listen.

Maybe it does some sort of calculation to let us know who is going to call next by accessing calls? #facepalm

A nightmare at its best

Good designs solve more problems than you originally intended them to solve.

From my team lead.

True that~~

My home setup is always messy... So, I’m posting my office setup...

Hmm... 🤔