Friend: What is your New Year's resolution??

Me: 7680×4320

Friend: Stupid Nerd. *Walks aways*

As a programmer, I'm outraged.

Today I presented a client with their new website.

Feedback from the owner was "I fucking love it".
Got a cash bonus and a bottle of champagne before leaving.

Today was a good day!

My wife: “Commit, then come to bed.”

Really want to get shit done today.

Lets browse Spotify for 3 hours to find good focus music.

Spend 2 hours designing a new IDE color theme and inspections which should really help me do code reviews faster

Oh, lunch time!

Maybe after lunch I should read some random clickbait blog posts on organizational paradigms.

...

And now I'm stranded on devRant. 😫

Everything is going as planned

Oh shit. I found something better. Had to delete previous rant.

Google Assistant is actually being cheeky!

Life saver

This is a valid point.

Our programming teacher had a surgery on his left eye and will not be able to do the lessons with us. Guess what the subject of the email he sent us was.

"I can't C#."
He made a pun about his fucking health status, alright then.

Q: How long did the loop take?

A: For a while

Not buying bitcoin in 2008

Uninstalling devrant, devrantron and blocking the site in the router

Cocaine... Lots and lots of cocaine...
I'm joking, don't to drugs kids :)
Unless it's cocaine.. God I love cocaine

\(+_+)/

My stressball went on vacation

My life lately.

My girlfriend saw me coding in XCode.
GF: What are you doing?
Me: Ahmm. Coding.
GF: *saw the colors in every line of code
GF: That's easy. You just need to follow the color pattern. Green, Blue, Red and Yellow.
Me:
Macbook:
XCode:
Charger:

BTW. She's a Preschool Teacher. Hahahaha

//TODO: Laugh

How to write a good Code

Here we go

I get depressed when I see templates that look better than anything I could ever come up with 😯

just found this on reddit... this is freaking hilarious 😂😂

My wife opens a document, writes her entire paper and uses the close ❌ button to save it.

I think I married an adrenaline junkie.

Website design philosophies:

Apple: "...and a really big picture there, and a really big picture there, and a really big picture there, and..."

Microsoft: "border-radius:0 !important;"

Google: "EVERYTHING MOVES!!! And most websites get material design. Most."

Amazon: "We're slowly moving away from 2009"

Wix: "How can we further increase load times?"

Literally any download site: "Click here! No, click here! Nononono!! Click here!!..."

Facebook: "We can't change anything because our main age demographic is around 55"

University websites: "That information isn't hard enough to find yet. Decrease the search accuracy and increase broken links."

Just ordered my rubber duck. It'll be here in 2 to 3 business days...

The bugs have learned to hide

Q:What's more dangerous than no documentation ..

A:Wrong documentation ..

Dear programmers everywhere who keep your blogs running for years after you stop posting: Thank you!

I guess it's a bad rant…