My wife came home from her baby shower with this onesie. It made me so happy.

Receiving my password by email (yes, plain text) when I click on "forgot your password".

Yesterday, my employer promoted me to lead web developer.

I’m still the only web developer.

The best APIs are the ones which aren't versioned and completely change key features overnight.

Woke up this morning to three broken client apps. Yay.

TIL german ICE trains use Chrome to show the next stations

The only thing hard about working with Git is working with people who don't know Git

Client : pls put the disclaimer that the site uses cookies.
Me: but we don't use cookies this is a static page
Client: Still, the pop up makes the site look more professional, kindly add the feature asap
Me: :/

Me: so glad it's Friday!
Coworker: it's Wednesday...
Me: FUUUUCCKK. This is bullshit

a little confession: i've rarely used test suites in my projects (due to laziness and lack of time).

i've started a new project and now i HAD to write tests in order to make my PM happy.

Then i had to refactor a lot of code.

IT WAS SO EASY WITH TESTS.
I WAS A FOOL.
STUPID PAST ME, STUPID!

Fell like I can finally vent this now I've calmed down.

Me: You've fucked the tree again
Junior: No I haven't
Me: It says there "Fixing merge conflicts"
Junior: Well it wasn't me I wouldn't have done a merge
Me: It has your name next to it...
Junior: Well that commit wasn't there a second ago
Me: it's dated for Friday...
Junior: Well if you hadn't committed to master and blah blah blah
Me: We'll if you knew know to use git we wouldn't have this problem.

I don't know why @dfox , @trogus didn't want a username with underscore and I'm sure they must be having some valid reason for it. But how in fuck did this user have the guts to rate the app 1 star simply because it doesn't have a login with fb feature? I mean you can request for a feature but it's dumb of you to rate 1 star because it doesn't have a feature you want. This is true for any app not only devRant.

Source : One of the user reviews of devRant on the play store.

This is not a rant but this is great

I GOT THAT JOB OFFER YES! AT LEAST I WON'T SEARCH FOR JOB AFTER OUR GRADUATION. I LIKE THIS FEELING YES!!!

When you use a new technology without reading the documentation first.

The news:
"Oh no, big tech companies are taking advantage of our information and tracking everything we do. We're too dependent! "

Us:
"Wow this sounds important. *Googles it *"

"Everyone needs to know, *shares on Facebook*"

Wait.....

!Rant

Support Call:
”our PC stick isn't booting up! Come and fix it! (angry)”

Me:
”The PC are meant to boot up whenever power is delivered to them. Are you sure your TVs are powered on?”

Support Call:
”Yes! I just pressed the power button on both TVs and it didn't turn on the PC sticks.”

Me:
”So you can confirm the TVs are on? Can you change the input and see what happens?”

Support Phone:
”Stop wasting my time and send someone down to fix it now! I told you it isn't working!”

Me:
”Ok, we will get someone out to you as soon as possible.”

Then a support guy drives 2 hours to their store.

When he gets there he realizes that the TVs power is connected to a light switch and they has the switch off!!!

He said ”can we turn on some lights so I can see behind the TV?” and then all the fucking TVs came on.

These are times when I fully understand the concept of “firing a customer”.

The customer sent an email saying ”the downtime for your product was unacceptable.” even after it was explained to them that the problem was them turning off the power.

These fucking idiots actually expect us to deliver products to display on TVs without fucking electricity to run them.

Oh.. So the deadline is tomorrow? How about we schedule a fucking FOUR HOUR meeting to speed things up?

Yeah, fuck you too...

Wohoo! Just signed for my first work as a developer! :)

My bosses have estimated 5 (five!) days to start & finish a corporate website (no wordpress) for one of our clients.
However, we don't even have images and texts :)

This will be funny

Me after coding the whole night w/ 30-minute sleep.

I bet Internet Explorer won't die until at least another decade from now

Sensible people would be asleep right now.

Where dafuq is the tabs or spaces?!?!?

They are trying to teach people to code... But they don't use any tabs or spaces in their examples. Wtf. You are breeding shit coders.

Why the fuck do some people need to talk so much while working?
Let me code in peace, damnit. 😒

Anyone else get a little freaked out when someone tells you a website works BEST on IE?

When you want to go home from the airport but some morron names his hotel "at home"

"This website has to work in IE"

That moment when your prof has to resort to Stack Overflow after failing at debugging.

😂😂

I loved Java very much..
Then i started using it.

Client: “Hey this thing isn’t working correctly.”
Me: “Hmm, looks like there was a bug in the last update. The team and I are going to work on a fix. In the meantime here’s a tool to help you get what you need.”
Client:”Yay!”

*A little while later*
Same Client:”Hey this thing isn’t working.”
Me:”Hey, yeah, it’s the same thing. That bug I told you about? Yeah, we’re still working on it. We’ll let you know when it’s finished I promise but we’re trying to fix it without introducing more bugs.”
Client:”Ok sounds good.”

*A little while later*
Same Client:”Hey this thing isn’t working.”
Me:”Bro...we just went over this...”

*A little while later*
Same Client:”Hey seems like there’s a bug in our system that was found by -insert random coworker’s name here-. Are we looking into to this?”
Me:”Wtf dude.”

*A little while later*
Same Client:”Hey this thing isn’t working.”
Me: -smashes my face against keyboard-

You know it is gonna be "fun" integrating client APIs, when all of them respond with
"Thanks for submitting the request"
And no error or status code whatsoever, no matter what you send.

Also, the client likes to test/call this API in Internet explorer address bar, and doesn't trust Postman. Amazing shit dude.