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Joined devRant on 4/16/2016
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My dream project is to work on a Hollywood grade raytracing engine (Pixar Renderman, Disney Hyperion,...) I have done some hobby grade ones like to produce the image here6
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Looking for a job as a deveoper be like:
Job title: car driver
Job requirements: professional skills in driving normal- and heavy-freight cars, buses and trucks, trolley buses, trams, subways, tractors, shovel diggers, contemporary light and heavy tanks currently in use by NATO countries.
Skills in rally and extreme driving are obligatory!
Formula-1 driving experience is a plus.
Knowledge and experience in repairing of piston and rotor/Wankel engines, automatic and manual transmissions, ignition systems, board computer, ABS, ABD, GPS and car-audio systems by world-known manufacturers - obligatory!
Experience with car-painting and tinsmith tasks is a plus.
The applicants must have certificates by BMW, General Motors and Bosch, but not older than two years.
Compensation: $15-$20/hour, depends on the interview result.
Education requirements: Bachelor's Degree of Engineering.41 -
When someone is so used to being told no that they argue with you for 20 minutes when you agree with them.
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My coworker implemented this date extension for no reason. Also handles back before they changed it. He wrote tests too6
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Hey everyone - just a note on rants about politics: we've had a long-standing policy not to really allow any of them. So if you post one and see it quickly disappear from the feed, that's why.
We've gathered a lot of feedback on this and Tim and I both agree that Facebook is ridden with posts about politics and one of the more refreshing aspects of devRant is we've kept it free of that. It's also an aspect of Facebook that many people I've talked to really hate.
Thank you, and feel free to let me know if you have any questions.31 -
*Now that's what I call a Hacker*
MOTHER OF ALL AUTOMATIONS
This seems a long post. but you will definitely +1 the post after reading this.
xxx: OK, so, our build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know, that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... If something - anything - requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that.
xxx: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy"
xxx: You're gonna love this
xxx: smack-my-bitch-up.sh - sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server after 9pm with his login.
xxx: kumar-asshole.sh - scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help", "trouble", "sorry" etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time".
xxx: hangover.sh - another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling well/gonna work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive sessions on the server at 8:45am.
xxx: (and the oscar goes to) fuckingcoffee.sh - this one waits exactly 17 seconds (!), then opens an SSH session to our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has SSHD up and running) and sends some weird gibberish to it. Looks binary. Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half-caf latte and waits another 24 (!) seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from the dudes desk.
xxx: holy sh*t I'm keeping those
Credit: http://bit.ly/1jcTuTT
The bash scripts weren't bogus, you can find his scripts on the this github URL:
https://github.com/narkoz/...56 -
Dear dfox,
Thank you for not making your app completely change layouts and screw up scrolling whenever we turn on our sides when reading rants in bed, unlike nearly every mobile web browser out there. We all really appreciate it.
--Random devRanter12 -
I have become so paranoid at every ++ and comment on my rants my heart races if someone has the same name as a colleague FML, thought this was going to relieve stress 😨1
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Don't get too comfortable.
If your workplace isn't much of a learning environment, it's either time to learn on your own time or leave that workplace.
Don't be arrogant with those who are less tech savy. If your boss/cowoker doesn't understand, at least give them them a chance ☺.
Be kind to new developers who make mistakes; you were in their shoes once.
Realize there's more to life than just designing and implementing software. Don't let other areas of your life suffer just because you're a godly developer.3 -
I now understand the double tap feature. It's really useful when your reading devRant while eating.6