*Builds a web component for a client website*

CLIENT: I don't like it, can I have it a tiny bit over to the right more

ME: Taps the arrow key a few times making it look like I'm doing something.(Which actually does nothing)

Client: 👌Perfect

😂😂😂 Wut 😂😂😂

Took a coding exam today ..

.. on paper.

Dear gradle, no offense but I believe Rome took less time to build!

Good news: Today my app reached 1 million daily users. 😃😃😃💰

Bad news: It started out as a side project and my shitty code is not scaling well at all. 🙃

Why the fuck do some people need to talk so much while working?
Let me code in peace, damnit. 😒

Linux..

My parts came!

Got call from extremely angry customer, our product is shit and doesn't work. At all. Important customer so I went to visit.

He had the perfect setup, our product to the left, our competitor's to the right.

He connected the Ethernet cable to their product, it worked. He plugged it out and connected to ours... Nothing. Shit.

I started to debug on the premises, took logs, everything. It seemed like our product didn't receive any data at all. What the fuck? Tried everything, debugged low level, still nothing. Sweating as hell.

After two hours I got a strange feeling. So I swapped place, our product to the right, competitor's to the left. Now OUR product worked, competitor's zilch.

THE FUCKING ETHERNET CABLE HAD A GLITCH. IF YOU BENT IT TO THE RIGHT IT WORKED, IF YOU BENT IT TO THE LEFT IT WAS BROKEN.

I had never seen a customer be this embarrassed in my life. He apologized to me, my boss, his boss, the Queen, everyone.

We got the contract.

So a friend of mine asked me today "got any proposals?"
Me: "yeah, in fact I got two of them"
Friend: "... Nice!"
Me: "yeah. Both were from my client"
Friend bursts out laughing.

My sister got me some stickers as a birthday present but she didn't know where to buy them. So she painted a gift card instead...😮

try {
❤
} catch(e) {
🍺
}

PYTHON♥️

Found this posted on the wall at a courthouse here in Los Angeles. 😂

When you don't have money to pay a designer so you decide to do it by yourself.

It's my first try...

My classmates are such hypocrites. They pretend to be programmers, but they can't fool me.

"Oh sorry. I can't show you the result of my html code. I have to compile it first, but there's no WiFi."

There's so many things wrong with that.

Decided to go hardcore Vim in 2018.

That moment when

If you name your methods a, b, c, x, z, etc

Then I hate you.

If the idiot wants me to help then use proper method names!

As a programmer, I'm outraged.

Somewhere out there there are a bunch of dudes working to produce an a.i like system for sex dolls.

I just think that shit is funny.

I imagine two dev colleagues sitting next to each other, on their phone, each feeling very secure in the anonymity of devrant.

I used ! important in my CSS ... I have sinned

😂😂😂😂😂😂

The teacher didn't show up and everybody left, so i did a little painting 😅

Got rejected today with the reason that I looked tired in the job interview.

wow devrant, you finally did it.

Αll times classic.

Someone is mining Bitcoin in town

No credits, sorry

I grew up with a hacker for a brother, always tampering with shit and my dad was always taking computers apart and repairing them. Although I was too little to be of any help, I was dumbfounded and couldn’t get enough. To be cool, I took all my toys apart to see what made them work. My brother taught me the dark side of a computer and my father the light side. I could go on and on, but meh.