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Management: "We have a Team Building session next week"
Colleague A: "Paintballing"
Colleague B: "Go-Karting"
On the day: "Welcome. Today we will be playing an IT Helpdesk Role Playing Game"
Kill me.6 -
FUCK YOU, STOP FUCKING WITH ME! my stupid fucking colleague has just replaced all the semi colons in my repo with Greek question marks for the 5TH FUCKING TIME THIS MONTH. it wasn't funny to start, it isn't funny now, so take your fucking rat-like grin and hyena laugh and FUCK OFF AND WORK! fuck me28
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When you're creating new website and Chrome asks you if you want to translate the page from Latin.4
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Freshman: hey can you check what's wrong with my code?
Me: ya of course
*Sees zero comments, no indents, all variables named a,b,c,etc.*
Me: oh would you look at the time!6 -
Little fun story
About 3 years ago, my woman came gome from picking up our son from kindergarten.
She told me that she met a very nice woman - also a mom - whose man is also a dev (He is a FullStackDev, while I mainly do backend in PHP) .
She said that she invited them over for BBQ the next day.
In my mind, I was like "Fuck, now I need to listen to some wanker explaining me how great it is to be doing full stack with all the latest and greatest tools and bells and whistles why I am the fat kid using PHP"...
The BBQ-day arrived, we have met, we have talked, and we have been best friends and brothers-from-another-mother ever since.
Life is good sometimes.5 -
Tips for all the programmers out there:
- A programmer is not a PC repair man, just no one seems to remember about that
- Programming is thinking, not typing.
Counting starts from zero, not one.
- Even after completing a degree and courses and working on IT projects, learning never stops. If you want to stay competitive you should also work on personal projects that force you to use languages and software you never work with on the job.
- You don’t need serious math skills to be a developer. However, you’ll need basic algebra, logic, strong problem-solving skills, and most of all, patience.
- You don’t need a degree to be a developer - programming is like almost any profession: if you’re good at it, people will pay you for your skills, regardless of how you got there.
- Sleeping with a problem, can actually solve it.14 -
Was visiting a house for possibly renting a room there.
The guy who showed me around gave me the weirdest look when I asked about the Internet speed cD
Priorities!9 -
"Give someone a program, you frustrate them for a day; teach them how to program, you frustrate them for a lifetime." - David Leinweber6
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It happened.
I wrote "you're missing a tab in your python code" as an answer on StackOverflow.
I was downvoted AND told that I wasn't correct: it was missing 4 spaces and not a tab, according to the python guidelines.
Now, I haven't read them, but my Richard Hendrix fucking intensifies.
Fuck spaces. And if python guidelines talk about spaces, fuck python guidelines too!30 -
"QA Engineer walks into a bar. Orders a beer. Orders 0 beers. Orders 999999999 beers. Orders a lizard. Orders -1 beers. Orders a sfdeljknesv." - Bill Sempf6
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YouTube: tapping like 1px out of the like button, obviously you want to reply to the comment
Facebook: let's just remove the like button altogether, only exposing it to the comment section
DevRant: let's make it possible to double-tap anywhere on the post to upvote it
Only one of them did things the right way 🤨6 -
Client: The webpage has been inaccessible all weekend!!
Me: Oh you mean the page you need to have a VPN connection to access?
Client: Yes that one!
Me: Are you connected to the VPN?
Client: Oh...no I'm not. *connects to VPN* Its working now.5





