Me too..
What about you?

How to scare an end user.
P.S. I want to push this to production. XD

I'm expecting probably no, but in the name of outdoorsy things not at all related to code, anyone else here enjoy electric bicycles?

Just grabbed this thing and it's absurdly fun, and helps me put some social distance between myself and other riders.

Excuse me what the fuck?

Damn! I never thought resigning from first company is not easy.
The team was amazing, overall culture was great. But after working for 2 years and making product stable enough, the learning curve started to flatten.
Decided to move on, last day was most painful. Sitting on the chair, wondering whether I did the right thing. All the memories flash black on that day. Nervous but little bit excited. Kinda mixed feelings

But turned out that job switch was even better. Good pay + one hell of learning to build product from scratch.

!rant
So anyone else likes Scorpion TV Series?

!dev
Fuck you google!!
Let me send a mail to my shitty internet service provider with abusive words as much as possible.

Fucking gmail rejecting my message as spam by content filtering.

What the fuck Microsoft !! Your android apps are total piece of shit! Fucking outlook Android app don't have support to view doc file which is created using your shitty Microsoft teams portal.

If I click on that doc file link through my outlook app, you redirect me to chrome.
Ok that's still acceptable. But the real shit starts now. You tell me that your browser isn't supported! Is this fucking joke?? Who in the world develops a website which can't support latest version of Android chrome?
Now that I have installed your shitty Microsoft teams app, it doesn't show up in "open with" options. Clicking on that link is still redirecting to the chrome saying that browser is unsupported.

Also, your shitty Microsoft teams app can't edit fucking doc file. When I click on your Microsoft word icon, You again ask me to install Android app for Microsoft word.
Seriously fuck you Microsoft and your shitty apps!

To build a machine as shown in 'Person of interest'.

P.S. If you are hearing Person of Interest for the first time, put it on top of your tv series watchlist. You will not regret it.

Taken from Instagram account: @exploregeeks

1. Silicon Valley
2. Mr. Robot
3. Scorpion

Which one would you vote?

Fucking shit for brains authors that think the digital world is a fantasy realm where everything can happen just to aid their story. Out of boredom i watched "scorpion" today, a tv series about a group of geniusses which are a special case task force.
They got a visitor from the government saying the servers from the federal reserve bank were encrypted with ransomware. I already twitched when they said the economic system would collapse if the servers were left inoperational for a few days. Then one guy got to his desk and "hacked" the fed network to check... he then tried to remove the malware but "it changed itself when observed". But they got the magical fingerprint of the device that uploaded it. In the end some non-programmers created the malware, but it is super fast and dangerous because it runs on a quantum computer which makes it hyper fast and dangerous. They got to the quantum computer which was a glowing cube inside another cube with lasers going into it and they had to use mirrors to divert the lasers to slow down that quantum thingy. And be careful with that, otherwise it explodes. In the end the anti-malware battled the malware and won, all in a matter of minutes.

This is a multimillion hollywood production. How can a movie this abusive to computer science even air on television? Shit like this is the reason people still think the cyberworld is some instable thing that can explode any second. It's not, it's an instable thing that can break down any second. I remember "ghost in the wires" and people had surreal imaginations about the internet already. Shit like this is why people stay dumb and think everything can be done in seconds. If i ever should encounter one of these idiots i tell him i have an app that can publish his browser history by taking a picture of his phone and watch his reaction.
Time to shuw down the tv and learn vim again.

!rant

This is my first post. I just want to say that you guys are awesome!!! I love all the rants that I understand. I can relate to that even though I just started my career as a software engineer few months ago.

Keep posting awesome rants!

Love you all !! 😊

I always spend minute or two to delete "Hey It looks like you are using ad blocker" popup div and some overflow-hidden css class by pressing F12.

I'll do it again and again and again...

Fuck those annoying advertisements.

My first django website going into dev environment. (Management portal for company's license management)
I know there will be a river of bugs but, still I'm happy.
Also, this was the first assignment on my first job.

Motorola:
It was the only company which used to provide great budget android smartphone with stock android and regular updates. (ranting this on my Moto G3) But from moto G3, they fucked up with promised android OS upgrade (shitty Lenovo)

Microsoft (for fucking with windows 10):
Still remember that first stable build of windows 10 released in 2015. After the first update they never stopped fucking with user's computer with different bugs. Still I haven't seen any build as stable as first one.

Don't be a language or framework fanatic!

Forget about complex problems, understanding context of your teammate thoughts is hard

Oh Shit! Here we go again!

print(request_permissions)
>> [ ]

if request_permissions:
//some if shit
else:
raise 404

It was supposed to raise 404 for empty array, but continue to exit if.

Me: What the fuck?

**printing request POST data**
**empty, nothing wrong here**

**double checked print statement output**
** still printing [ ] **

**restart server and again checking print statement**
**still same**

Getting mad over myself, for failing to debug simple if else.

Wait....

print(type(request_permissions))
>> <class 'str'>
Me: What the actual fuck??

Fucker literally dumped empty array to JSON causing array to convert into string "[ ]" and still using if else based on array instead of string length.

Thanks to our Product Manager who approved our request to revamp this part of code and also revamping the whole shitty project developed by 3rd party in upcoming quarter.

Google documentation sucks!

Lack of practical examples. They show us very simple example like clicking on button and then straight away redirect to API docs.
Wait, let me at least understand how things fit in together.

Me: Hey google where is step by step guide, at least for setup?
Google: We don't do that here!

*Email chain forwarded by support team to our dev team*
Hi,
Please assist our customer. He is unable to reset his password!

*Went through the emails turned out that customer is asking for password reset request for legacy website for which we don't work at all*

Scrum master sending another reply to look into the matter on High priority.

We again double checked for the customer but he is not registered on the new website.

Apparently, both scrum master and support team and entire company is aware that our team is not working for legacy website.
But No one reads the email properly and keep forwarding to dev team disturbing the entire team.

Some times things like this are done by product manager and her associate, but they keep replying to each other on unnecessary things till they come to conclusion and scrum master try hard to keep up with them with his own agile disciplines.

The real web development is optimising the shitty front end code.
The task assigned to me is optimisation of dashboard page of website which was developed by freenlancers.(end of contract from their side)
The front end is mess. Individual js files (bootstrap, popper, jQuery, jQuery ui, loader and main) loading in production inside head tag of html file
No text compression.
Every template has random number of their own js files in any block of template. Nothing structured. There will be fantastic waste of time figuring out file dependencies.
Same with css files. Some are scss, some plain css. No compression. No proper modules.
Basically, I have to go through 25-30 html files. Then understand, which template is extending which one. Go through all js and css files in each html file and again understand dependencies between them
This is gonna be real fun.

Continuing my last random post. (Please don't bother to take a look at it.)
But, hey you. Yes you, get yourself one beer/whisky and cheers!!
Why? Because my first django project ran successfully in staging environment!! Ok, There were few little bugs. But I fixed most of them.
I don't drink. So please go and enjoy on behalf of me.
And don't drink too much. Keep one bottle for production deployment.
P.S. This is just a beginning of the new journey! Still, lot to learn and experience.

IE11 weird behaviour!!

So I'm building a website for management purpose. I'm asked to implement confirm pop up box.
This pop up box uses one div with dynamic content which is created using javascript and not hardcoded in html file.
Here comes the twist. I used append() function to append child elements inside that div. Everything works fine in chrome and Firefox. Pop up shows upon clicking button. But in case of IE 11, on clicking button, It asks user to download fucking json file, instead of showing pop up !!
I'm like WTF is going on??? How the fuck this json file is generated by my code??
Turned out, this happened because of append() function. That doesn't support in IE11. Fixed it, by using appendChild() method.

Don't ask me what kind of data was in that json file. I was too scared to open it!!
Things like this are scary and weird for a fresher like me. :(

Thoughts on Flutter!
I'd like to see something like flutter for front end web development. I like the approach used by Google for Hybrid app development.
Dart language fits perfect for the case. Static typing, OOPS, Generics, state management, UI design everything right out of the box.
I don't have to create layout separately like HTML in web or XML in android.
Everything is managed by Dart alone.
It's like what developer wishes for UI rich app development.
I'm not saying Flutter or/and Dart is the perfect solution. Every language has pros and cons. (Maybe not applicable to JavaScript! Haha! ) But still The overall solution to UI development is way cleaner than web.

My answer to their survey -->

What, if anything, do you most _dislike_ about Firebase In-App Messaging?

Come on, have you sit a normal dev, completely new to this push notification thing and ask him to make run a simple app like the flutter firebase_messaging plugin example? For sure you did not oh dear brain dead moron that found his college degree in a Linux magazine 'Ruby special edition'.

Every-f**kin thing about that Firebase is loose end. I read all Medium articles, your utterly soporific documentation that never ends, I am actually running the flutter plugin example firebase_messaging. Nothing works or is referenced correctly: nothing. You really go blind eyes in life... you guys; right? Oh, there is a flimsy workaround in the 100th post under the Github issue number 10 thousand... lets close the crash report. If I did not change 50 meaningless lines in gradle-what-not files to make your brick-of-puke to work, I did not changed a single one.

I dream of you, looking at all those nonsense config files, with cross side eyes and some small but constant sweat, sweat that stinks piss btw, leaving your eyes because you see the end, the absolute total fuckup coming. The day where all that thick stinky shit will become beyond salvation; blurred by infinite uncontrolled and skewed complexity; your creation, your pathetic brain exposed for us all.

For sure I am not the first one to complain... your whole thing, from the first to last quark that constitute it, is irrelevant; a never ending pile of non sense. Someone with all the world contained sabotage determination would not have done lower. Thank you for making me loose hours down deep your shit show. So appreciated.

The setup is: servers, your crap-as-a-service and some mobile devices. For Christ sake, sending 100 bytes as a little [ beep beep + 'hello kitty' ] is not fucking rocket science. Yet you fuckin push it to be a grinding task ... for eternity!!!

You know what, you should invent and require another, new, useless key-value called 'Registration API Key Plugin ID Service' that we have to generate and sync on two machines, everyday, using something obscure shit like a 'Gradle terminal'. Maybe also you could deprecate another key, rename another one to make things worst and I propose to choose a new hash function that we have to compile ourselves. A good candidate would be a C buggy source code from some random Github hacker... who has injected some platform dependent SIMD code (he works on PowerPC and have not test on x64); you know, the guy you admire because he is so much more lowlife that you and has all the Pokemon on his desk. Well that guy just finished a really really rapid hash function... over GPU in a server less fashion... we have an API for it. Every new user will gain 3ms for every new key. WOW, Imagine the gain over millions of users!!! Push that in the official pipe fucktard!.. What are you waiting for? Wait, no, change the whole service name and infrastructure. Move everything to CLSG (cloud lambda service ... by Google); that is it, brilliant!

And Oh, yeah, to secure the whole void, bury the doc for the new hash under 3000 words, lost between v2, v1 and some other deprecated doc that also have 3000 and are still first result on Google. Finally I think about it, let go the doc, fuck it... a tutorial, for 'weak ass' right.
One last thing, rewrite all your tech in the latest new in house language, split everything in 'femto services' => ( one assembly operation by OS process ) and finally cramp all those in containers... Agile, for sure it has to be Agile. Users will really appreciate the improvements of your mandatory service.

Oh no!
Mac key bindings lowered my productivity more than I thought.

What are your thoughts on sprint planning meeting with poker cards? ( Everytime we had those meetings, dev team points are always similar and rest of the people never)

Scorpion: The worst TV show I will probably ever see.

that's all my rant

Recruiters message me on LinkedIn for team lead/senior developer role. I haven't completed 2 years in my first company which is obviously visible on my LinkedIn profile.
Why they do this? Just plain stupidity?

JUST IN: The unexpected sequel to my previous rant that NOBODY asked for!

I'll give it to you in dialogue form as it's more dramatic and *juicy* that way...

(Context: wizard used the warrior's blood, who descends from an ancient lineage of powerful sorcerors, to cast a high-level spell which allowed the party to teleport to safety when they were trapped and about to die. The warrior is worried about his crazy use of black magic, so she confronts him about it.)

"Alright, old man," she says, her tone serious, yet tinged with concern. "I couldn't help but notice the... let's call it 'unorthodox' spellcasting earlier. What was that about?"

"Well, you wanted me to draw the circle using golden dust and a lamb for the sacrifice?" Uzair raises an eyebrow, his tone riddled with sarcasm. "Because spells of that level of complexity require both things, you know? A circle and an offering." He explains calmly, then shakes his head. "But turns out, the blood of an Ashaffi accounts for both things if you draw the sigils with it. Hey, don't blame me, your own ancestors invented it!"

"Very funny, Uzair." Hashade crosses her arms, her expression unamused. "But seriously, that shit was utterly deranged. I can't have you going all 'Black Scorpion' on our ass, what with the demented use of blood magic, needlessly setting entire buildings ablaze and that mother fucking all-incinerating black hellfire inferno." Her voice is stern, but her eyes show genuine care. "You're... __BREAKING BAD__, old man! You have to chill."

"Oh, so is my wizardry getting on your neves now, is it?" He recoils back slightly in suprise, feeling offended. "We just spanked the Sanie's Guild buttcheeks until they were red and swollen, then proceeded to __FUCK__ them in the ASS with a *DIAMOND* fucking COCK. And you're complaining?"

Hashade's eye's reveal her agitation. "I'm not complaining, I'm concerned! We're not just fighting for ourselves, we're fighting for everyone else too! And if you start playing fast and loose with that kind of power, we're gonna have more than just *one* black smoldering crater to deal with." Her voice is firm, but it's clear she's trying to keep the situation from escalating. "Look, I know you're powerful, but that's not an excuse to go full-on mad scientist on us. We gotta keep our shit tight, yeah?"

"Concerned?!" He tilts his head to the side. "What, you think I'm becoming evil? Come on, spit it out!"

"Evil? No, I don't..." Hashade sighs, running a hand through her silver hair. "Oh no, you know what, yeah. I do. I think you're slowly turning evil." Her expression hardens. "You swapped your book of supplications for a grimoire detailing the most horrible shit in excruciating detail! You shouted out 'G-d is great' while witnessing a disastrous explosion that left everyone else traumatized! You joked around before and after cutting two guards in half, for fuck's sake!" She lowers her head and pinches her nose bridge. "I don't know, I'll admit that, I just don't know what's this shit that's gotten to you. But I don't like it, I really don't. I don't like where this is going, old man!"

"Well," He said, calmly. "you killed El-Fuqer by forcing him to eat his own cock and balls while sowing his ass shut and then took a fat stinking dump on his face." He quietly recalled the, ehem, 'little' incident. "But see, I don't waggle your fucking nutsack about the fucked up shit you've done. And I'm not going to start now."

"THAT'S DIFFERENT! THAT WAS __JUSTICE__!" Her eyes flashed with anger.

"JUSTICE?!! YOU CALL SHITTING ON A CORPSE 'JUSTICE'?!!" He pushed her to the side and stormed out. "I MAY BE AN EVIL WIZARD, BUT I NEVER DEFECATED ON MY ENEMIES, HASHADE. NEVER. FOR FUCKS SAKE!"

"Wait!" Her voice cracked. "You can't just leave like this!"

"I can." He didn't even look back. "And I am."

"I'm not leaving you alone!" She strides closer to him, ignoring the sting of his words. "I can't let you destroy yourself like this!"

(ROGUE BUSTS IN THROUGH THE KITCHEN) "ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, YOU TWO, GET A ROOM ALREADY!"

~ F I N ~

The more you good and quick at your work, the more feedback points/improvements you get.

Seriously fuck those last minute changes!

Javascript - VS code
Python - VS code (linters sometimes show weird errors)
Dart/Flutter - VS code
Debugging qa instance via eb ssh - Vim with vim cheat sheet opened in browser tab

Hi guys, If you are front end dev (especially react dev) please read this and share your thoughts.
I recently started with react.js. But I didn't like the idea of nesting components. I know this is too early to talk about it. I'm not halfway through tutorials. But I'm loosing motivation to learn react.js
This never happened to me. I learned few frameworks in past. Django and codeigniter. They follow MVC/MVT architecture. And writing code in it looks cleaner and simpler.
In react JSX is confusing at first. You have to read same line twice or thrice to understand. I'm not saying JSX is bad, but it's not readable enough.

In early lessons I learnt that in react everything is component. And every component comes under one root component. Don't you guys think this well get messy for large application. You are dealing with number of nested components from one file into another.

I'm not against react. But the way react is forcing you to write code, is not something I enjoy. Let me know your thoughts. Maybe I'll get some kinda booster to continue react.

Seriously What the fuck??
I updated realtek PCIe controller drivers last weekend and somehow managed to fix BSOD. Took whole sunday couldn't play games.

Now again on these weekend BSOD due to the updated driver...... Nooooo!!!!!