Join devRant
Do all the things like
++ or -- rants, post your own rants, comment on others' rants and build your customized dev avatar
Sign Up
Pipeless API
From the creators of devRant, Pipeless lets you power real-time personalized recommendations and activity feeds using a simple API
Learn More
-
I am gonna rage for a bit.
Before I start, know this: I diehard love development, computer science and everythjng surrounding it.
The area comes with a very nice and interesting history and cultural impact. In particular, here as it was in the U.S of A. I love it, I love researching till my eyes beg me to stop and my brain fries. I love reading about history and the silicon knights that madd shit happen through digital wizardry.
And you can only imagine how happy I was when I got my shiny lol B.S in Comp Sci, keep it in my office and errthang.
I
Fucking
Love
My
Field
But. I have noticed something recently. In 2018(obviously before that) this new generation has a knack for making things cringey.
What do I mean by that?
Well, shit like that. Is it necessary? Or what about images(multiple) showing stuff like "double tap for your favorite language!"
Why? Why must we be this way? Why do people find a way to shit all over nice things? Is this shit necessary?
I specially hate pictures of girls showing their legs and right next to them a laptop with some basic af css file --->#codergirl ....fuck off.
Or the trillions of code pictures that are only html or some js framework flavor of the week.
Its just retarded man.
38 -
About six months ago I decided I wanted to learn to write a neural network from the ground up, using only the C++ standard lib. Had to learn some linear algebra, multivariable calc and a dash of wizardry.
The mathematics of neural networks is still one of the coolest things I've ever learnt. It still marvels me that you can make a specialized mini-brain out of nothing but numbers.17 -
Man in the event of some newcomers to the development game, those that will mostly work in the web domain or sys admins that are in training I want to offer some small advice:
Do not neglect vim
I know it might be a bitch to use at first. And I will never use it as a replacement to vs code. But fuuuuuck me I cannot count the number of times that vim wizardry has helped me when dealing with servers when dealing on a machine with windows and nothing but putty.
The thing is a lifesaver yo, and it makes for an impressive show when doing something in front of senior executives.
Learn it, love it, live by it
And exit is :q, save is :w, to copy and paste is :v then surround the text and then y to yank it and p to paste it.
:vsplit and :split are your friends and to move around splits is ctrl w and direction.
Good luck my friends. Stay classy.9 -
How the fuck have I not been using GO!
What bullshit wizardry is this!!!
I think I'm in fucking love!!
Sorry php, it's been a long long relationship, but I think I have a crush on this hamster. 🥰17 -
Newbie just started this week and went changing hibernate settings on us. Changed hbm2ddl from update to create, which nukes the data on every deploy. She thought she was working against her local DB when in fact she was pointed at the shared integration database, thus nuking INT. Through a couple hours of PL/SQL wizardry, I managed to resurrect the data. Within 5 minutes of giving the team the all clear, the data disappeared again...betcha can guess what happened...again!2
-
What were some of your "OH MY GOD I'M AN AWESOME CODE WIZARD!" moments?
For example, I can remember two or three:
One was when I, with only cursory knowledge of C, never having worked with it but having been exposed to it (and having lots of experience with C# therefore familiar with the c-family syntax), took 5 minute look at a source code and pointed out a bug that the student working on it was trying to solve for the past 2 hours. Sadly, I don't remember what the bug was anymore.
Second one was on reddit, someone posted to gamedev group a 2minute video from his voxel+ai framework he was working on, I watched it, and without any idea what it's written in, or how, I was like "you seem to be dropping frames in a pretty regular manner unrelated to anything I see happening on the screen. You're creating too much garbage on frame-by-frame basis (probably while your AI is exploring what to do), look into object pooling, it'll help".
And the guy responded in a few hours like "by gosh, you're right! thank you! and what do you think about the source code?" (he linked git repo below the video.
And I was like OMG I'M A MAGE, I DIDN'T EVEN CLICK THE REPO LINK, ONLY NOW AFTERWARDS, AND yeah, it's c++ so sadly nothing for me, but OMG I JUST WROTE THE FIRST THING THAT CAME TO MY MIND, DIDN'T EXPECT IT TO BE CORRECT, I'M AWESOME.
=D and the feeling stayed with me for about two days.
(If it's not clear yet, it's perfectly okay, in fact, required, to brag about yourself in answering this question ;) )18 -
Everytime I think I'm smarter than the compiler, I'm... absolutely not smarter than the compiler lol4
-
🎶Lemon Tree🎶
I wonder why,
I wonder how,
This stupid piece of code actually works right now.
And all that I could see, it's actually compiling...
(Happens all the time)1 -
Why is it that other programmers think I’m a wizard when they’ve been struggling with an error in their project for hours and I just read their error messages and tell them where the error is/what they need to do/fix?2
-
Google announced a little piece of wizardry called MusicML, which seems to be a pretty decent music generator based on text prompts or sample imputs
I can only think how much would this thing help indie game developers (if available), but then there are a lot more industry (beside music itself) that could save lots of money with this kind of stuff
I mean, yeah, the results are not so great or ground breaking, but so would be most of the human generated compositions as well; if the music is not the main focus, most of the results are just enough. Just think about an elevator with a custom generated track for day, or so many other places where sound it's just a side stimulus
What a time to be alive c:5 -
Took me an hour and a half to realize why my function wasn’t returning anything that made sense.
Forgot to put a negative sign in front of my negative bound.
Took me an additional hour and a half to solve for all the edge cases.
Relatedly, I should learn to sleep more.
Also, kind of proud of my notes application, but the tables go all funky in mobile and my CSS wizardry is .... not even amateurish.
I am so tired, I literally almost *signed* this.3 -
For my father, I do wizardry, for my mother I do magic, for my brother I type weird stuff, for my gf I code useless stuff, for my grandparents I do nothing, for my non dev friends I make softwares, for my dev friends... Magic again1
-
I just interviewed the guy who is interested in my Linux SysAdmin position. He's really cool and I think he'll get the job, but he is a Windows admin actually. (No problem, since he'll work with me for three month's as a mentoring program and it's supposed for him to learn the stuff)
My question to all other Linux Witchers and Witches out there, do you know a mighty spell to seal his windows daemon away, such that he's able to resist the sore temptation by my co-workers (windows enthusiasts)?2 -
Trying out the new version of fasm, I realize it's good, and conclude I should update my code to work with it as there's small incompatibilities with the syntax.
So, quick flat assembler lesson: the macro system is freaking nuts, but there are limitations on the old version.
One issue, for instance, is recursive macros aren't easily possible. By "easily" I mean without resorting to black magic, of course. Utilizing the arcane power of crack, I can automatically define the same macro multiple times, up to a maximum recursion depth. But it's a flimsy patch, on top of stupid, and also has limitations. New version fixes this.
Another problem is capturing lines of code. It's not impossible, again, but a pain in the ass that requires too much drug-addled wizardry to deal with. Also fixed in new version.
Why would you want to capture lines of code? Well, because I can do this, for instance:
macro parse line {
··match a =+ b , line \{
····add a,b;
··\}
};
You can process lines of code like this. The above is a trivial example that makes no fucking sense, but essentially the assembler allows you define your own syntax, and with sufficient patience, you can use this feature to develop absolutely super fucking humongous galactic unrolls, so it's a fantastic code emitter.
Anyway, the third major issue is `{}` curlies have to be escaped according to the nesting level as seen in the example; this is due to a parser limitation. [#] hashes and [`] backticks, which are used to concatenate and stringify tokens respectively, have to be escaped as well depending on the nesting level at which the token originates. This was also fixed.
There's other minor problems but that gives you sufficient context. What happens is the new version of fasm fixes all of these problems that were either annoying me, forcing me to write much more mystical code than I'd normally agree to, and in some rare cases even limiting me in what I could do...
But "limiting" needs to be contextualized as well: I understand fasm macros well enough to write a virtual machine with them. Wish I was kidding. I called it the Arcane 9 Machine, A9M for short. Here, bitch was the prototype for the VM my fucking compiler uses: https://github.com/Liebranca/forge/...
So how am I """limited""", then? You wouldn't understand. As much as I hate to say it, that which should immediately be called into question, you're gonna have to trust me. There are many further extravagant affronts to humanity that I yearn to commit with absolute impunity, and I will NOT be DENIED.
Point is code can be rewritten in much simpler, shorter, cleaner form.
Logic can be much more intricate and sophisticated.
Recursion is no longer a problem.
Namespaces are now a thing.
Capturing -- and processing -- lines of code is easier than ever...
Nearly every problem I had with fasm is gone with this update: thusly, my power grows rather... exponentially.
And I SWEAR that I will NOT use it for good. I shall be the most corrupt, bloodthirsty, deranged tyrant ever known to this accursed digital landscape of broken souls and forgotten dreams.
*I* will reforge the world with black smoldering flame.
*I* will bury my enemies in ill-and-damned obsidian caskets.
And *I* will feed their armies to a gigantic, ravenous mass grave...
Yes... YES! This is the moment!
PREPARE THE RITUAL ROOM (https://youtube.com/watch/...)
Couriers! Ride towards the homeland! Bring word of our success.
And you, page, fetch me my sombersteel graver...
I shall inscribe the spell into these very walls...
in the ELEVENTH degree!
** MANIACAL EVIL LAUGHTER ** -
<!doctype confusedRant 😕>
Plot: we need to release our website in two weeks which holds at least a thousand pages. All these pages are manually migrated from the old website, which doesn't have a database. Current status: 650 pages/1000 are completed, 40 different templates need to be adapted. I'm alone on these templates, my colleagues create the pages and fill the new database
So I'm working on the templates a WebDev coded for our website on a licensed CMS, and had this decently simple html block that looks like a square and consisting of roughly this (Emmet style):
a.area > blockquote > strong.title + p
After adding another <a> element inside the p, I noticed that my <a> wouldn't display and bust the whole look of the square.
Just for more details, the CSS the dev made is ultra specified (meaning each element is too precisely "described" : div.class .child .child2 { /* styles */ } when it could be .class .child2 for example). Also, the templates he made need to be compatible with any "module" the website has, thus the need of this high specificity
So I fired up the DevTools to check what happened, and had:
Expected: a.area > blockquote > strong.title + p > a
Actual result: some new a.area were wrapping the <strong>, the <p> and the <a> I just added. The source code was not showing any of this but just the rules I initially wrote - the expected result
Wtf?! I thought the JS the dev made was adding elements. I disabled said JS, and bam, these a.area were still wrapping everything!! What black magic would add these stupid tags I never asked for.
So I went looking in the CSS files in case some wizardry was happening, but everything was OK.
I tried changing my structure, changing tag (swapping a.area to p.area or without .area), HTML just said "nope, have those please".
Eventually I rewrote my own module out of frustration after three quarters of an hour fiddling with this stupid "module". I hate losing time for such shenanigans and under a lot of pressure because of deadlines.
Still haven't figured why those <element>.area would wrap everything out of nowhere...3 -
So I'm a young lad with a career in Front end development I love coding in HTML (yes I know it's not a coding language to some, but to a computer illiterate person it's wizardry so I've got that going for me) I've got skills in responsive design with css and skills in javascript, jQuery and a little bit of skill in PHP But I'm not sure what to go for next? I'm not much of a back end developer..got nothing against it, just never was my cuppa tea. I want to improve my skills but I'm not sure what to look into.. Any advice?2
-
Typing strange text on a computer and making things happen.
Magic!
My sister always gets amazed by all the wizardry. -
currently backing up a micro-usb pendrive with the following method:
I have mounted my usb hard drive on my raspberry
I have mounted the raspberry on my phone using sshfs
Now I'm dd-ing the pendrive (the device) to the mounted disk on the phone.3 -
JUST IN: The unexpected sequel to my previous rant that NOBODY asked for!
I'll give it to you in dialogue form as it's more dramatic and *juicy* that way...
(Context: wizard used the warrior's blood, who descends from an ancient lineage of powerful sorcerors, to cast a high-level spell which allowed the party to teleport to safety when they were trapped and about to die. The warrior is worried about his crazy use of black magic, so she confronts him about it.)
"Alright, old man," she says, her tone serious, yet tinged with concern. "I couldn't help but notice the... let's call it 'unorthodox' spellcasting earlier. What was that about?"
"Well, you wanted me to draw the circle using golden dust and a lamb for the sacrifice?" Uzair raises an eyebrow, his tone riddled with sarcasm. "Because spells of that level of complexity require both things, you know? A circle and an offering." He explains calmly, then shakes his head. "But turns out, the blood of an Ashaffi accounts for both things if you draw the sigils with it. Hey, don't blame me, your own ancestors invented it!"
"Very funny, Uzair." Hashade crosses her arms, her expression unamused. "But seriously, that shit was utterly deranged. I can't have you going all 'Black Scorpion' on our ass, what with the demented use of blood magic, needlessly setting entire buildings ablaze and that mother fucking all-incinerating black hellfire inferno." Her voice is stern, but her eyes show genuine care. "You're... __BREAKING BAD__, old man! You have to chill."
"Oh, so is my wizardry getting on your neves now, is it?" He recoils back slightly in suprise, feeling offended. "We just spanked the Sanie's Guild buttcheeks until they were red and swollen, then proceeded to __FUCK__ them in the ASS with a *DIAMOND* fucking COCK. And you're complaining?"
Hashade's eye's reveal her agitation. "I'm not complaining, I'm concerned! We're not just fighting for ourselves, we're fighting for everyone else too! And if you start playing fast and loose with that kind of power, we're gonna have more than just *one* black smoldering crater to deal with." Her voice is firm, but it's clear she's trying to keep the situation from escalating. "Look, I know you're powerful, but that's not an excuse to go full-on mad scientist on us. We gotta keep our shit tight, yeah?"
"Concerned?!" He tilts his head to the side. "What, you think I'm becoming evil? Come on, spit it out!"
"Evil? No, I don't..." Hashade sighs, running a hand through her silver hair. "Oh no, you know what, yeah. I do. I think you're slowly turning evil." Her expression hardens. "You swapped your book of supplications for a grimoire detailing the most horrible shit in excruciating detail! You shouted out 'G-d is great' while witnessing a disastrous explosion that left everyone else traumatized! You joked around before and after cutting two guards in half, for fuck's sake!" She lowers her head and pinches her nose bridge. "I don't know, I'll admit that, I just don't know what's this shit that's gotten to you. But I don't like it, I really don't. I don't like where this is going, old man!"
"Well," He said, calmly. "you killed El-Fuqer by forcing him to eat his own cock and balls while sowing his ass shut and then took a fat stinking dump on his face." He quietly recalled the, ehem, 'little' incident. "But see, I don't waggle your fucking nutsack about the fucked up shit you've done. And I'm not going to start now."
"THAT'S DIFFERENT! THAT WAS __JUSTICE__!" Her eyes flashed with anger.
"JUSTICE?!! YOU CALL SHITTING ON A CORPSE 'JUSTICE'?!!" He pushed her to the side and stormed out. "I MAY BE AN EVIL WIZARD, BUT I NEVER DEFECATED ON MY ENEMIES, HASHADE. NEVER. FOR FUCKS SAKE!"
"Wait!" Her voice cracked. "You can't just leave like this!"
"I can." He didn't even look back. "And I am."
"I'm not leaving you alone!" She strides closer to him, ignoring the sting of his words. "I can't let you destroy yourself like this!"
(ROGUE BUSTS IN THROUGH THE KITCHEN) "ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, YOU TWO, GET A ROOM ALREADY!"
~ F I N ~
Top Tags
Weekly Rant
View