Had a customer on the phone who couldn't figure something out. Wanted to give him instructions so I asked him whether he used mac or windows (getting used to not including Linux in that question). His reply: uhm this has a weird name... do you know elementary os?

Me: you're a Linux user?!
Him: yes, I'm done with windows and mac.

Then i gave him the instructions. Nice twist of the day!

CS Professor: “What M word is the black hole to all productivity?”

Student: “Management”

CS Professor: “Was going to say meetings but that’s better”

Got a star on GitHub once

try {
❤
} catch(e) {
🍺
}

My classmates are such hypocrites. They pretend to be programmers, but they can't fool me.

"Oh sorry. I can't show you the result of my html code. I have to compile it first, but there's no WiFi."

There's so many things wrong with that.

When your girlfriend deletes the private repository after breakup

Want to read a horror story?

Number of computers
1900: 0
1950: 100
1980: 10000
1990: 1000000
2000: 1000000000
2010: 1000000000000000000
2020: 1
2030: 1
2040: 1
2050: 1

My mom said that if I don't get off my computer and do my homework she'll slam my head on the keyboard, but I think she's jokinfjreoiwjrtwe4to8rkljreun8f4ny84c8y4t58lym4wthylmhawt4mylt4amlathnatyn

Right😂😅

What would you choose?

Source: Wim Remes, via nixCraft.

Classmate sees C#
"C hashtag"

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
WHY ARE YOU HERE?

Jep, that's one way to handle this...

Nostalgia level: ∞

Did you say security?

Normal gamer:
- How tf didn't he die?! It was a headshot!

Programmer:
- Fuck hitboxes.

Saw this on insta thought it was pretty funny

The end has begun

Code comments be like....

Every js dev I know

Loser.

No doubt 😂

My classroom had this, nice inspiration
Bad UX

pshht 🤫😄

Only pure evil can design a PC case that has reset button same size and shape like USB port and place it next to USB ports.

Me: Dad, can I borrow your car?
Dad: What's the magic word?
Me: sudo??

Oh!! Nevermind!!

If you somehow managed to install Mac OS on a raspberry Pi, does that make it an Apple Pi?

I'm sorry, I'll leave now...

When you try to tell your fellow devs to start using Git 😶

You know you are drunk when you SSH into the server and try to SSH back into your computer.😂