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another day another downvote to 0 on a stackoverflow post of a bug that is confirmed and reproducible
What. The. Fuck. Did. Just. Happen.
A random girl followed me on social media. She looked nice and intelligent so I followed her back.
Started to chat about some random stuff. She told me she works at the HR department of an international company and asked me what's my job. Told her I'm a software developer.
Right after that she sent me a selfie. Obviously I said she looks nice, she thanked it and asked some more about my job. After a short discussion I received another selfie but somewhere in between she lost the outer layer of her clothing.
She still looks nice but now I'm sitting here utterly confused and cant tell whether it was my sarcastic humour and moderately handsome facial features which charmed her or she just needs to recruit someone for a new project and willing to do everything to reach the quota.68
Tell me what tilts you the most when you are talking to a recruiter or HR personal. I will start;
Them implying that money should not be important when I am changing jobs- so I can accept their lowball offer.
STFU biatch, I am good at this profession, of course I will go to higher salary or higher comfort or a combination of both. I am not running a charity here!3
ChatGPT made my life easier! 😌
Now I'm the 10x Developer LinkedIn People talked about. 😎
Though I didn't find Bard as responsive as ChatGPT! 31
My startup boss took away our teams chat because we needed to "let everyone see our conversations for context". i said that's more like paranoia. then he told us we had to use company portraits and logos on LinkedIn and Social Media. and to post company ads and links on social media at least once a day. im not a social media manager, im a programmer MF'r. is this normal?????12
I fucking hate my job so much. I feel like I work harder than anyone at my level, yet I can't get promoted. I'm so fucking sick of putting in effort for nothing. We all get paid really well, and yet no one seems to give a shit about the work. Meanwhile I'm busting my ass, for what? No promotion.
For promo to next level, the projects I work on aren't supposed to matter, just the execution. And yet, I get told I don't have enough impact when I'm interested in promo? How can I, I have no fucking choice what I work on you fuckers.
Fucking bullshit job.8
Employer: so why do you want to join this organization?
Engineer: well like i said in the first 4 interviews, I love desks. Sitting behind them. Standing behind them.
Employer: are you a standing or sitting man?
Engineer: i like to sit in the morning and then switch up to stand at lunch.
Employer: a man with a plan. Very good. Do you remember anything from school?
Engineer: not a goddamn thing.
Employer: perfect. You don't need math. Just emails. You like emails?
Engineer: love emails.
Employer: there's gonna be a lot of emails.
Engineer: can't get enough emails.
Employer: perfect. Do you like a clear separation between life and work?
Engineer: oh not at all. I like it to muddy together in a never ending hell.
Employer: alright and you're familiar with work culture?
Engineer: oh those hours i work for free?
Engineer: I love that bullshit.
Employer: alright terrific. And are you familiar with the hate hierarchy?
Engineer: yeah the tech's hate the engineers, the engineers hate the tech's and the managers hate everyb-
Employer: everybody. Perfect. Alright I- honestly I think we'd like to make an offer.
Engineer: well, first I gotta leverage that with my current employer for a raise. And if they don't budge, I'll jump shut.
Employer: no loyalty at all?
Engineer: not at all.
Employer: you're hired.5
ChatGPT was asked to write a script for benchmarking some SQL and plotting the resulting data.
Not only was it able to do it, but, without further prompting, it realized it had made an error, explained what it 'thought' the error was and fixed it.
Excuse me, I need to go get my asshole sewn up because I'm hemorrhaging to death from the brick I just shat.
soo.. yeah.. I've just solved an annoying bug using only chatgpt.
My first commit in this new project. And it's based on chatgpt.
Literally just saved me from days of reading through kafka docs, auth mechanisms and other stuff. And no, the google did not provide me with a proper answer/hints. The only hint was "the configuration might be wrong". Well alright, but I was NOT using any configuration in the first place...
Fun times ahead :) I might even consider the pro version if it keeps delivering like that.17
In january 2023 i was contacted by a recruiter offering me a job position.
I DID NOT ASK FOR A JOB.
I WAS NOT LOOKING FOR A JOB.
THEY contacted ME.
Ok. So i went along with it and see how it goes. They probably wont hire me nor would i give a shit. Chatted with this recruiter for a while. She forgets to answer my message for 5 fucking days. Twice. Once because she was doing God knows what and the second time because she was on paid vacation. Fine i don't give a shit about you at all anyways.
So this recruiter chatting has been stretched out for several days. I think over a WEEK. So she forwarded me to their lead developer.
I applied to work as a full stack java spring boot backend + angular frontend engineer.
- java backend
- angular frontend
- full stack
- shitload of devops
- shitload of projects i built
- worked with clients
- have CS degree, graduated
- worked a job at their rival company
What could go fucking wrong with all of these stats right?
During technical + hr interview (3 of us on google meets) they asked me what salary I'd be comfortable with.
I said $1500/month straight out.
keep in mind:
- In my country $500 or $600 is a salary for engineers per month
- You get a raise of +$150 which is around $750 after working for 1+ year
- You can earn $1000+ after you work for +2 years
- Rent here is $200-300 a month at minimun. And because of inflation its just getting worse especially with food. So this salary is not for living but for survival.
Their lead engineer gave me a WHOLE ASS FUCKING PROJECT TO BUILD and i had to code it within 10 days. Great so at least 17+ days of my fucking life to waste on these fucktards who contacted ME.
The project was about building a web app coffee shop literally what mcdonalds has when you order via those tablets. I had to build this in java spring boot and angular. I had to integrate:
- docker, devops
- barmen, baristas, orders
- people can order at the table or to go
- each barista can take 5 orders at a time
- each coffee has different types of fields and brewing time
- each barman brews each coffee different period of time
- barista cant take more than 5 orders for to go until barman finishes the previous order
- barista can take more than 5 orders but if those orders were ordered from table, and they have to be put in queue
- had to build CRUD admin functionality coffee's
- had to export them all of the postman routes
- had to design a scalable database infrastructure for all of this alone
- shitload of stuff more
And guess what. After 10 painful days I BUILT THE WHOLE THING MYSELF AND I BUILT EVERYTHING THEY ASKED FOR. IT WAS WORKING.
Submitted it. They told me they'll contact me within 7 days to schedule the final Technical interview after they review what i built. Great so another 17+7 days of my fucking time wasted.
OH and they also told me to send them THE WHOLE GITHUB REPOSITORY AND TRANSFER OWNERSHIP TO THEIR COMPANY'S OWNERSHIP. once you do this you cant have your repository back. WTF? WHY CANT YOU JUST REVIEW THE CODE FROM MY PUBLIC REPOSITORY? That was so weird but what can i fucking do argue with these dickheads?
After a week of them not answering i contacted them via email. They forgot and apologized. Smh. Then they scheduled an interview within 3 days. Great more of my time wasted.
During interview i was on a google meets with their lead engineer, 1 backend java spring boot engineer and 1 angular frontend developer. They were milking me dry for 1 whole fucking hour.
They only pointed out the flaws in what i built, which are miniscule and have not once congratulated me on the rest of the good parts. I explained them i had to rush those parts so the code may not be perfect. I had other shit to do in my life and not work for your shitty project for $0/hour for 10 days you fucking dickriders.
So they quickly ran over to theory. They asked me where is jwt token stored. Who generates it. How the backend knows to authenticate user by it. I explained.
What are solid principles. I said i cant explain what is it but i understand how it works, why its needed and how to implement it (they can clearly see in the project i just build that i applied SOLID principles everywhere) - but i do admit i dont know the theory behind it 100% clearly.
Then they asked me about observables and promises in angular. I explained them how they work and how subscribe method is used (as they can clearly see that i used it in the code). Then they asked me to explain them under the hood of how observables work. The fuck? I dont know and dont care? But i can learn it as i work there?
Final result: after dragging this for 1 fucking month for miserable $1500/month they told me: we can either hire you now but for a much lower salary which you probably wont be happy with, or you can study more these things we discussed "and know why the car leaks oil" and reapply back to us in 2-3 months!24
A female boss I worked for, pulled an employee retention tactic that still gives me the chills.
She paid dogshit salaries to all her employees. And yelled at them enough to keep them overworked and burnt out.
When one of them tried to resign, she said "fine you can leave us but I won't be giving you any salary slips, no experience/recommendation letter and neither acknowledge that you ever worked here.
You get to leave the company when I decide for you.
You have already stayed here so long that if you decide to disappear tomorrow it will leave a gap on your resume in your next interview."19
Dev: This content might be too large to fit into this area on mobile.
We might need to add scrolling or design it differently.
Designer: It fits perfectly in the design.
Dev: But the user might have a smaller screen size than in the design.
Designer: We don‘t optimize for small screens.
Dev: But we still need to handle it somehow.
Also, the text might be longer for other languages.
Designer: No problem, we will provide short text for all translations.
Dev: We have 30 languages and the translations are made by a third party. We can not control it.
Designer: We‘ll manage somehow.
Dev: Also, the user might be using an accessibility setting on the device which makes the font size larger.
Dev: Also, the available screen size might be reduced by the on-screen keyboard.
Designer: … Ok then.
It‘s always a conversation like this. It repeats indefinitely.10
This is why I don't use and will probably never use Python.
Back in the uni days, I had a very important assignment. It determined whether I was going to the fourth grade from the third or not. It involved math and charting. It was very complex, and I spent a very long time on research, naturally. I knew Python 3, and I decided to use it. The only lib I needed was matplotlib, which I installed with pip. So I did the whole thing, tested it again at home, closed my laptop and was ready to go. My laptop used Windows 7 and was set up to ignore the lid closing. When I closed it, nothing would happen, even the screen stayed on. When I arrived at the lab, I opened my laptop, hit Ctrl + B as usual… and matplotlib import wasn't working. I obviously panicked, I tried to do something about it, but it just kept throwing an import error. Reinstalling the library didn't help. My friends too weren't able to help me. It just wasn't working, and that was it.
I failed the assignment, automatically. I had nothing to show. This was the first time I failed anything in the uni. Later I rewrote the code in C++ with Qt plotting library, and everything worked fine.
I didn't use exotic things like PyPy. It was just Python 3, the most basic, official installation. If you promote your fucking language as a cross-platform solution, please be bothered to make its basic behaviour stable on the most popular OS out there.
I will probably never use Python again. Maybe this issue was addressed and fixed. Maybe it wasn't. Maybe it never would've happened on Linux or Mac. I don't care. It's like maintaining friendship with a person that betrayed you. I just can't do it.
JS and NPM never failed me.7
After an hour long discussion via call with someone and after over a year of working in web3. I can safely say the entire web3 is actually a sham. Im too tired and exhausted from scams and frauds to explain why. It is just a bunch of overhyped artificially inflated bullshit to lure you into the ponzi scheme. I am almost 100% sure with proof how this is all a lie. Web3 is equivalent to government and political corruption - just a bunch of EXTREMELY WEALTHY people ripping poor and middle class off by defrauding them through crypto and nfts to make the rich richer. Its truly disgusting. There is no way in HELL that you can work in this space and expect to succeed if you are not already wealthy. People apparently spend between $10,000 up to $500,000 on a single project for marketing. They spend it so easily as if they earn that sum of money back by tomorrow. This is truly sickening. The reason why marketing costs so much is because it manipulates naive and newbies, lures them into the web3 world by creating an illusion of get rich quick schemes "hey buy this jpg for $2000 and you'll be able to sell it for $20,000 in a week!" Truly truly sickening. Web3 isnt even a wild west. Web3 is a fucking dystopian void where these fucktards are like animals fighting each other who's gonna defraud a bigger chunk of thousands and millions of dollars from each other. Literal fucking shithole. I am so disappointed. I thought web3 technology was useful. Perhaps it is but people's greed has molded this technology into crime and frauds. Which is what it has become9
Devs: Can we please get adequate hardware to do our job correctly? Please, just a new set of larger monitors.
Lower management: Sure, this is going to be easy.
Upper management: Wait what? This will cost us around 500€ times 10? Any maybe in the end other departments will want that to, so make it times 100.
We're a 4+ billion company ... but yes, please, I love scroll bars and they make my work so much faster.4
CODING CODING CODING HAHAHA I LOVE PROGRAMMING BEING A LITTLE CODE SLUT. I LOVE SILICON VALLEY IM SUCH A QUIRKED UP LITTLE CODE SHAWTY LOOKING FOR SOME ALGOASS 🍆💦😩.
“Slams fists on keyboard”
I LOVE BEING A CUTE SCREEN TWINK, IMPRESSING PAPI CEO WITH MY FINGER COMBINATIONS. I LOVE PLEASING EXECUDADDY. 🍑😏
“Takes keyboard in hand and slams it against desk until keyboard keys explode everywhere”
I LOVE WATCHING THE AMERICAN GOVERNMENT AND CORPORATE AMERICA FUCK MY ASS IN RETURN FOR PERSONAL PROFITS. 🤑☔️
*digs fingernails into the wall and claws off paint and then snorts it”
*pees and shits pants*
*cries in corner with extra agony*22
Hiring process is fucking broken ok?
We all do have something else to do, nobody wants to do "homework" for 4 fucking hours. Which let's be real, isn't 4 hours. It's always more. I try to squeeze it in a least amount of time which means mistakes will be made. I always try to show my knowledge of the language and it's features. But, you didn't do X. That's it, that is a no from us.
Dude, I just wrote a high production grade small project with 90%+ test coverage and you are telling me that those 2 small shit I made is a big deal? Fuck off
Most companies I worked with have a code full of shit and here I present to you, with a poetry and it's a no because of X?
My bet is that if I ever started to work there I would find a code that isn't tested and is in shit state
I got assigned approximately 20 tasks, all are high priority.
Coworker got assigned 2 tasks, (“like fix button sizes and padding”, “localisation “)
I got questioned: “are you sure you are a senior developer? Are you doing your work at all? If your coworker can finish low priority tasks in a day , why you as a senior can’t? “
Me :”if you have the ability to see , please tell me how many tasks I have that are in high priority.”
“Exactly, I need you to complete it now , I expect more from you as a senior. “
Me: “why not you tell me which tasks are higher priority? Because can’t be all are urgent. If everything is urgent , nothing is urgent.”
“Stop giving excuses, be a team player.”
Me :” how is it making excuses for asking urgencies of the tasks?”
“Hahaha you called yourself a senior. What a joke”
Me:”likewise, you called yourself a Project manager yet can’t manage. What a joke indeed.”20
About 2.5 days so 60 hours ish. Not worth, didn't win and company gets free code plus was a charity code for good event so rather they got charity brownie points and I'm sure they couldn't care less about charities. They were a bank. Complete waste honestly, food wasn't even good and was cold.
I rewrote my resume. It is getting shorter and shorter. Scary.
But I was thinking, that during interviews, I never get to ask the important questions. Like, I do need to ask a few things that are important for me. Those that are not written in their websites, and they will do their best to hide.
So I came up with a list of questions:
1. Do you pay for overtime work? what is the basis of pay? hours or work-module? how realistic are the work-modules?
2. Have you ever had issues with employees from minority groups?
3. How do you address employee's professional concerns? for example, about technological debt.
4. what's the policy for meeting and daily interruptions during brain-work? Are people ever forced to participate in meetings that could be summed up in emails? what's the company policy for initiating a meeting?
5. Who designs the software? Are the requirements always non-negotiable? do the direct developers have a say in design matters?
6. How close are job requirements (as advertised) to actual tasks I need to perform?
7. What's the company policy for motivating the employees?
8. How does the company deal with mental health issues? is it acceptable for people to take leaves due to mental health issues? Has anyone ever done it?
9. How does the company deal with individual needs for working methods and space? Specifically, how does that apply to meetings? Do you have company-wide meetings? How often are they? What's the impact on productivity? Can employees not participate? Do they have to have an excuse to not participate?
10. Do developers get to develop their skills during worktime often? Or is it a "do it in your own free time" kind of thing? Are there any resources available to those who want to develop their skills further? Is it included in the career planning and employee performance review?
11. Assume I work for your company for a year. What are the benefits I can potentially gain in a year from working here, aside from adding a line of work experience to my resume?
12. Does the company provide any form of free feminine hygiene products in the bathroom?
Any questions I should add?94
The MS Teams SDK is bullshit. It's so half baked and comes with instructions like "you'll probably want a better implementation for production, good luck cause you'll have to write it yourself."
Oh and don't forget to cache your installations in a file called "notifications.json"
Deploying will create 2 app registrations (OIDC) and about 6 resources in Azure... But "you'll probably want to log to app insights in production"... So I hope you're very familiar with Bicep cause you'll have to figure out how to add that to your template properly and there are about 7 Bicep files to decipher and it doesn't create an app insights out of the box.
Probably written by an intern.2
Interviewer: For this next code challenge you will not be allowed to use the internet, or an IDE.
Interviewer: OR a keyboard OR a mouse. I will be verbalizing the code to you and you need to memorize it and tell me where the bugs are.
Interviewer: We must do this exercise to know how you are as a dev without any performance enhancing “aid”. This way we can understand where you are truly at skill-wise, and what you are truly worth from a compensation perspective.
Dev: If I get a job with you will I be allowed to use the internet and an IDE and a keyboard/mouse?
Interview: Of course you would! Getting anything done without those is just about impossible. We just need to evaluate you without them to see how good you REALLY are.
SUPERVISOR: You wrote this 140 lines method, it's too long. You should split it up, it's not readable
IHateForALiving: Bruh be serious, this is a single switch-case; I can't split it.
SUPERVISOR: Fine, I'll do it.
HIS CODE: He split the 140 lines method into 2 methods: the first is 4 lines long; it's a try-catch surrounding a call to the other method, 136 lines long.9