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SkillsLinux, Python, JS, PHP*shame*
Joined devRant on 2/23/2018
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So, rage time.
A few months ago I inherited a big Wordpress website, with around 750 pages.
The client has reported the main menu is broken.
Upon looking at the code it appears the previous "Wordpress Developer" (ahem ...) attempted to rewrite navigation system - no idea why.
As part of the 4000 class below is a screenshot of part of the file where he's determining if the current menu item is active, within a loop. Whilst the whole if statement spans 409 lines - the code basically continues exactly the same downwards.
Shameful :/22 -
Try not to use floating point numbers in places where precision is important. Like for instance, money. Always store the base value where it makes the most sense15
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A hacker deleted the despacito video from youtube.
Those are not the hackers we deserve, but the hackers we need.18 -
Yesterday my friend was telling me that he was hacking some federal server in my country, and his girlfriend interrupted him and he couldn't complete the hacking
Such a lier 😏
We don't have girlfriends5 -
My Sunday night:
8p.m. “finally, down to one small function.”
9p.m. "shit."
10p.m. "why......"
1a.m. "aaaaaaaaaaaaaa finally done! Time for test cases."
1:15a.m. "shit."
2a.m. "why TF..."
2:36a.m. "Done, done, done!!!!" *Submit
2:37a.m. writing this post.1 -
I had a secondary Gmail account with a really nice short nickname (from the early invite/alpha days), forwarded to another of my mailboxes. It had a weak password, leaked as part of one of the many database leaks.
Eventually I noticed some dude in Brazil started using my Gmail, and he changed the password — but I still got a copy of everything he did through the forwarding rule. I caught him bragging to a friend on how he cracked hashes and stole and sold email accounts and user details in bulk.
He used my account as his main email account. Over the years I saw more and more personal details getting through. Eventually I received a mail with a plaintext password... which he also used for a PayPal account, coupled to a Mastercard.
I used a local website to send him a giant expensive bouquet of flowers with a box of chocolates, using his own PayPal and the default shipping address.
I included a card:
"Congratulations on acquiring my Gmail account, even if I'm 7 years late. Thanks for letting me be such an integral part of your life, for letting me know who you are, what you buy, how much you earn, who your family and friends are and where you live. I've surprised your mother with a cruise ticket as you mentioned on Facebook how sorry you were that you forgot her birthday and couldn't buy her a nice present. She seems like a lovely woman. I've also made a $1000 donation in your name to the EFF, to celebrate our distant friendship"31 -
Roommate's boyfriend visits just to work because his laptop can't connect via WiFi anymore.
Described the problem and fix attempts yesterday, he got two other tech savvy people involved, now suspects hardware problem.
I needed <1m to re-activate the WiFi adapter, now I'm seen as the local tech God as I deserve.3 -
Apple's marketing department are just dictionary junkies.
Have you guys read some of the latest Apple quotes for their products? You know, the ones where you visit the page and there's some large bold text summarising the product? Here's a few:
HomePod: "The new sound of home."
If you talk over my Spotify music YOU WILL BECOME THE NEW SOUND OF MY SHED.
iPhone X: "Say hello to the future."
E.Musk put a Tesla in space. Also the future can crash with a single character.
MacOS: "Your Mac. Elevated."
If you fly away I WILL use you as birthday balloon.
iPad Pro: "Anything you can do, you can do better."
SOONER OR LATER *Comment what you would put here*
But I mean hey. It sells right.
Reading it back maybe I'm just blind hating.11 -
I need help, my site said it's full so I have deleted everything in the media library but now all the images have gone!
Yes, thats its purpose!
Thank fuck it's Friday! -
Told my grandma that I‘m working as a Software Developer. Today a neighbor of her came to me and asked me if it is still possible to make money with repairing radios in 2018?
So it turned out that they we‘re talking about the jobs of their grandkids.
Your‘re great grandma ❤️😅2 -
Windows 10 updates. I see many posts about singular events that people have experienced, so I thought I'd try to sum up all the problems I have had.
Home computer, always on:
Is scheduled to update during 'inactive hours' but the options for that window are too narrow. So almost daily the 'required updates' overlay pops up WHILE I'M DOING STUFF and I have to say 'Ok' then close the update settings window that opens automatically so I can get on with what I'm doing.
Now, if I'm just browsing, writing or something like that, it's just really annoying.
But when I'm gaming and it causes the game to freeze up (because, you know, ubisoft and ea and such) and I lose my progress, that pisses me off.
When I'm hosting movie night with my friends and the movie gets interrupted, that pisses me off.
Even when I'm just trying to relax with a good show after a hard day and THAT gets interrupted, it really bugs me.
And then when there's a major update and I don't want to schedule it right away, they decide that I probably meant 'do it in an hour'. And then a message pops up every hour with only the option to postpone one more hour. What happened to all the options for scheduling it for several days in the future? Nope! Can't decide? We'll do it RIGHT NOW, NO TAKEBACKS, THAT'S FINAL!
I cannot fathom that they can't find a way to ACTUALLY do the 'inactive hours' thing.
And then there's the work computer. For the last two years, that has been a laptop that I shut down and take home every day. The common problem with that is that it always tells me it has to update when I want to shut down for the day because I have to go home. I can't leave the pc turned on in my bag, it would overheat. So since there is no option to shut down without updating anymore, I have had to rely on the fact that using the power button to shut down circumvents the update.
And if I don't remember to update at home, it's then going to waste my time the next morning at work.
Just give me the option to delay for a bit, then remind me NON-INTRUSIVELY so I can do it when I have the time.
And then there was the update that prevented the machine from booting and I had to waste TWO working days reinstalling EVERYTHING! And we were about 6-7 people hit by that update in our organization.
So yeah. Windows updates are a real fucking problem. Yes, I wan't critical fixes for security problems and other serious software flaws.
But the current policy of 'fuck you, we're doing this' is just not fucking acceptable in any way.3 -
I was newly hired to company. A customer came in yelling saying "there's a bug, this should do this but it's doing that..."
PM came to me and told me to "urgently fix this as this is an important customer".
So I started debugging for hours and asking around and all follow devs agreed that this is a bug. Then I found it!! And it was clear that it was not doing what the customer wanted.
I decided to look through this code history and found out that this part of the code wasn't changed for a year but the code commited before it did actually what the customer was expecting (whaaaa....)
Gathered the devs and the PM showing them what I found. They all looked at each other and then one said "ouuhhh right...yes it was doing this but we changed it to that..."
Turns out it's a feature not a bug, and everyone forgot about it.
FML8 -
"Knock Knock"
"Who's there?"
"Knock Knock"
"Who's there?"
"Knock Knock"
"Who's there?"
- DoS Attack20 -
How to Prank someone on Windows:
1: Take screenshot of desktop with cursor on the side so its not visible.
2: Set it as wallpaper
3: Hide desktop icons and taskbar
4: Go to mouse settings and invert it
5: ....
6: Profit18 -
Had a customer on the phone who couldn't figure something out. Wanted to give him instructions so I asked him whether he used mac or windows (getting used to not including Linux in that question). His reply: uhm this has a weird name... do you know elementary os?
Me: you're a Linux user?!
Him: yes, I'm done with windows and mac.
Then i gave him the instructions. Nice twist of the day!12