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"Programming is like writing a book... except if you miss a single comma on page 156 the whole thing makes no damn sense" - unknown15
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Boss: make this thing
Me: yeah no worries. Where is the spec?
Boss: We don't have enough one but we outsourced the design so call him
Designer: haven't started yet
Me: excellent
Boss: I'm going on holiday. I'll leave this to you.
Me: erm ok. I'm having a few problems getting stuff out of the designer though.
*2 weeks later and still no designs*
Boss: I'm back. Where is the progress?!
Me: indeed.
*1 week later i get half designs that sort of make sense*
Boss: hurry up!
*1 week later*
Me: designer you're busting my balls here
Designer: yeah lol
Me to boss: still having problems. No idea what I'm doing.
Boss: deal with it
*2 days later*
PM: we are demoing it to clients tomorrow
Me: brilliant. I'll become a magician then.
* Meeting goes well and no one notices the thing is a bit buggy*
*2 days later*
Me to boss and pm: you already know whats going on but I'll keep trying.
Boss: ok it's just a proof of concept anyway.
Designer: yeah here's the rest of the designs lol
*1 week later, the designs made no sense, no idea what they wanted but hey it's a proof of concept so I'll just do my best...*
*suddenly again, hey you have 1 week before we sell it. Lol. smashes a product together as fast as humanly possible, due to half designs and no time to do it right even html classes and CSS aren't right - didn't know things would be repeated at the time. No time to fix entire thing. Luckily just a proof of concept*
New senior developer: hey boss just said this is being sold tomorrow.
Me: wtf..It's a proof of concept and i was given longer...
New senior developer: no
Me: :(
Senior developer and all colleagues: it's full of bugs and doesn't work
Me: yes that will happen without specs, random tight deadlines, no designs that made sense and a total of about a week and a half to make an entire system for multiple user types to make applications, send messages, post jobs, handle all paperwork and move paperwork among different user types as they go through applications. I told everyone what was going on but i get no support...
*Silence*
Boss: wtf i gave you so long! All i know is my entire staff is working on a product that should be done ages ago
Me: ok, however i have said almost every day i need-
Boss: I'm not interested
*I finish my placement year and never get any promised work or the job offer*
Seems legit?16 -
Boss: Can we add a [Close] button at the top right of the modal instead for all the items, the back at the lower left seems out of place.
Me: What modal? You mean move the back button to the top right of the page?
Boss: And make it say [Close]
Me: But it navigates Back. It's not a modal so it doesn't close. [Back] makes more sense than [Close].
Boss: Ok
...
Boss: Change the [Back] on the modal to [Close].
Me: But... fine...
Buttons all now say "Close", they all have double quotes. No one has said anything.
18 -
boss: What the fuck guys! Why didn't you go to the meeting this morning? Have you checked your google calendar?
me: But, but it is scheduled to tomorrow, google calendar says that.
boss: Who put that date?
me: You
boss:....
boss:And fo you double checked it?
me: What do you mean?
boss: Double check! Check if what is in the google calendar is correct!
me: But that doesn't make any sense.
boss: No excuses!! Next time you must double check!10 -
Yesterday: "This fucking logic makes no sense. I can't work this shit out!"
Today (first look at the problem): "Oh... I think if I do this and this... Yeap, that'd work"
I love fresh brain thoughts in the morning.8 -
"Only stay late at work when it makes sense to, otherwise always leave on time. There's always going to be work left, no matter how much you get done in one day."
Best advice ever.
Edit: I have to say it was during my first week in my first recent grad job.2 -
"secure" messaging apps which aren't open source.
Isn't it common sense that, when you can't check an app for anything because it's closed source (backdoors, vulnerabilities etc), you technically can't be sure whether it's actually secure or not?
And no, I'm not going to trust an app dev on his/her blue fucking eyes on this one.28 -
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. I SPEND HOURS INVESTIGATING INCOMING & OUTGOING DATA. I CHECKED ALL THE CODE, I EVEN TEAMVIEWED A CUSTOMER WHICH WAS HAVING SOME ISSUES WITH MY APP.
TURNS OUT I FORGOT A FUCKING '/' IN MY FUCKING CODE. WHICH MEANS THE HOLE GODDAMN API URL MAKES NO SENSE.
WHY THE FUCK DO I ALWAYS OVERCOMPLICATE SHIT LIKE THIS.
FUCK2 -
DST is my arch enemy.
"Why did I get paid for 7 hours instead of 8?"
"Because you worked from 1:00 till 9:00"
"Yeah, that's 8 hours"
"No it wasn't"
"Why does this input field say invalid time for 02:00?"
"Because that time doesn't exist"
"Why are so many tests failing"
"Because they check timestamps and durations which don't make sense in non-continuous time"
October is even worse...6 -
Why the hell am I 200% more productive at 2 am? Makes literally no sense. I JUST WANT TO CODE LIKE THIS IN THE MORNINGS17
-
when you have to do this because the code looks correct but you're not sure what the heck is wrong because it doesn't make sense
12 -
....
I give up trying to write this.
I'm just too fucking pissed off.
My interactions with my micromanager make absolutely no sense -- she is clearly just trying to piss me off and blame me for everything, facts and reasoning be damned.
I tried detailing this week's examples (there are lots, and it's fucking Tuesday), but. screw it.
Fuck working for (and with) her.
She's a bitchface and a thundercunt.
I'm updating my resume and fucking off out of here.
God fucking damnit i hate her.23 -
HW issue causing blue screens? Windows' fault.
Driver bug? Windows' fault.
A program crashing? Windows' fault.
"Forced" updates you could've turned off? Windows' fault.
You have no common sense? Windows' fault.
Your girlfriend leaving you? Windows' fault.
Let's blame Windows because I got nothing else to blame.28 -
Two thousand fucking eighteen people!!!!
Stop this non sense "get a plane" for a fucking meeting that could be a fucking video conference.
Wtf? Everyone here seems to be addicted to flying, specially upper management... And if we need a new switch to keep the network running? Oh, for that we have no money :)4 -
My god people = shit...
“The *insert website here* isn’t working, I need you to fix it”
- Everything’s good on our end, it’s their end that needs to be checked.
“Why can’t you fix it...!?”
Oh... I don’t know, perhaps it’s because I don’t fucking work for them you cock munch!!
I don’t get paid enough to deal with stupid fucking people. Where the FUCK is your common sense?
I work for “X”, THAT means that if something is wrong with “Y”, I have NO control over it you cock breath having fuck stain.
That’s like ordering tacos from McDonald’s and getting pissed off because they look at your like your mother should have swollowed... NO SHIT!3 -
QA: When I open the app I get this strange error message that includes "No data connection could be established" near the start of it.
Me: I'll clean up how thats displayed, but the error means your phone doesn't have internet connection.
QA: No that can't be it, I do.
Me: You screenshot shows no WiFi or 3g / 4g symbols.
QA: No those are never there, please investigate.
Me: I have investigated and found that every other one of your screenshots had a WiFi or a 3g symbol. Example: <link>. Please check your connection and try again, i'll clean up the error display.
PM: Oh i've had an issue something like this before. We really need to show users an error screen. We can't just leave them on this screen with no error message at all.
Me: ... we have an error, thats what QA is complaining about, its not loading the text and displaying the error object.
Anyone else want to not pay attention and complain about something else that doesn't make sense? ... no? ... ok good, back to work then7 -
*project manager + designer are showing new designs*
PM: so, can we get some estimates?
Devs (literally all of us): do we have a mockup for this interaction?
Designer: no.
Devs: What about that one?
Designer: not yet.
Devs: What happens when you click here? Hover there? How does this look if I select that option + this option at the same time? Does it make sense that a user can select *this* option with *that* option? They're kind of mutually exclusive.
PM: Well...
BTW: code freeze is in two weeks...4 -
(overheard colleagues)
"hey, client x wants to speak to you, can I put them through?"
"what's it it about?"
*mumbles something*
"dafuq?! Oh well, put him through already 😑"
Me: hey, what did he want?
Colleague: they wanted help with setting up a page on their site with a maintenance message for when their site goes down.
Me: ah righ.... wait what? What's the function of a maintenance page on a site if the entire site is down?!
Colleague: yeah, that 🤣
Well, okay, then 😶12 -
- We need a „Save Session“ - Button in the Navbar.
- No problem
- ... and the icon should be a thumbs up!
Yeah... uuuh... Makes perfect sense... 🙃3 -
Interviewer: One last thing, hope you are not married.
She: No, but how is that relevant?
Interviewer: Well because this job involves a lot of traveling you see...
She: Makes sense Sir. Also, I have a lawyer friend, in case you need any help...
Interviewer: What help?
She: Help with filing for your divorce Sir, as this job involves a lot of traveling...5 -
Everyone’s a remote worker at our company by default. Literally no HQ or central physical office to report to. As it should be for most people who are knowledge workers or coders. Why commute and pollute and all that nonsense? It doesn’t make sense anymore for a lot of people like us.14
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Programming is like writing a book... except when you miss a single comma on page 126, the whole thing makes no sense.
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Client: We are tired of having to go only to specific users to get things actioned, we need everyone to be given admin access so that we can get work done efficiently
Dev: Highly do not recommend that *outlines the likely consequences*.
Client: We don’t care, we DEMAND you do this. We’ll make sure everyone is careful.
Dev: Ok but I warned you. Please submit this request in writing.
Client: Ok, not sure why you would need that. I told you everything would be fine.
*Not even two days later*
Client: HELP!!! OUR DATA IS NOW COMPLETELY MESSED UP. WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT WOULD HAVE CAUSED THIS IT’S AS IF EVERYONE IS RANDOMLY DOING WHATEVER THEY WANT HOWEVER THEY WANT IN ORDER TO SUITE THEIR OWN NEEDS. IT MAKES NO SENSE HOW THIS HAS OCCURRED. I TOLD EVERYONE SPECIFICALLY TO NOT CAUSE ISSUES!!! WE NEED THIS FIXED A.S.A.P!!!!!!
Dev: …6 -
Hey look, npm broke my project again. Surprise!
Code and dependencies on my local machine, all untouched for a couple of weeks, no longer works. I've no idea how it even managed that.
Oh, and `npm update` crashes.
eventually solved by upgrading npm and running `npm update --depth 500` because some arbitrary child dependencies changed without updating the parent packages, ofc. on my local machine. without me having run `npm update` for about a month.
because of course that makes sense.
Second time in two months, too.
isn't npm great?3 -
“In order to release on production you merge on production”
Makes sense.
“In order to release on staging you merge on release”
Wait, what?
“The CI for the staging release is called release to production”
What? No, stop!
“You also need to create a tag called pre-production-deployment, so that staging can work”
STOP FFS
“It’s very easy, you just need to read the documentation!”
How do people do not realise they are spitting out bs?3 -
!rant ! technical
Just want to share with my devrant family.
Finally in relationship.
Funny thing is
Me-she
24-29
Hindu-jain
Non veg - veg
Don't have dressing sense- awesome dressing sense
Programmer-jewelry designer
Not so hygienic - so much hygienic
No gym ,no exercise - yoga master
Geeky - hate pc worms
2 times in jailed - follow every rule
Back bancher - front bancher
Love shayari/old bollywood song - EDM / western songs
Common bridge between us
MARVAL FANS
😂19 -
It was the year 2000, when IE was considered awesome. The internet then was slow and expensive and I had a quota about half an hour a day for dial up.
I discovered that I could view the source code of any page and while it looked rather cryptic I slowly started to understand how it worked. After months of tinkering in Notepad, I was able to write some html and JavaScript. No books, no online tutorials, just pure act of curiosity and a sense of adventure.
How to write JavaScript properly had to wait for another decade after an engineering degree, a dozen other languages, and new browser. But those tinkering days were what got me into coding.1 -
Why THE FUCK would anyone make a totally free (in the sense of price; gratuit) software project, and then not make it open-source?
What is the benefit of stifling the development of your own project when you have no monetary gain from doing so?14 -
Our school like:
School: hey everyone! Today we are learning java.
We: But we can Java and we already read the whole book
School: So ok! Let's do Java for 4 months!
We: What the... c'mon that makes no sense!
School: ...
We: ...
*After 4 months*
School: So class lets write a exam in java!
We: oh boy! this is nice!
School: Open your VM!
*Everyone started theyr VM and opened Eclipse*
School: Aaaaand now open NetBeans!
We: Holy Moly Crap! Really? why?
School: because...because...because...fuck off! we dont know...but it stands on the fucking exam so shut the fuck up u little crap!11 -
Is it just me or does this shirt make no sense? If your coffee was empty, then it would return true and you would keep coding. If it was not empty you would fill it.
Plus it's not a while loop, so unless this is some sort of recursion you wouldn't keep going....
4 -
When you have literally no idea how to make your homework project so you try to Google/StackOverflow it piece by piece to make a Frankenstein's monster code.
And then you still have no idea how to cobble it all together in a way that makes sense.4 -
Staring at cursed blinking cursors.
Repairing work of worst thinking workers
Reverse merges or it'll murder the servers, it nurtures despair
Amateur managers, dimwitted savages interrupt all of us janitors
Cleaning up damages, spills and experiments using skills in embarrassment
Explicit foulness, in a minute it's straight to the bowels with weapons of limitless vowels
A bittersweet hateful machete, eviscerates stateful spaghetti
The slow disease flowing from keys knowing it's going to please
The growing unease, no one agrees, there's no guarantees with your useless degrees
Need more drugs, keyboard's crawling with bugs, falling as I chug
A bottle of cognac gotta love all the hacks, no poise for code that lacks
All the noise, gotta relax, before I destroy the syntax.
Excuse me for not making sense.
Too gloomy, aching and tense.10 -
#rant
Instead of receiving a motivation in 2018, my boss decided to go anti mainstream and started with demotivation speech.
He started with how good we were last year even when he wasn't around. Well done team! But after that, it went downhill.
We were asked to work even harder, we got new policy (no unpaid leave, no paid overtime, minimum 40 hours working, etc) which some of them make sense and some don't, a specifically set break time (apparently to shut down smokers for smoking at random times), and warning for not being punctual.
And pay rise only after end of financial year.
To make it worse, we are not allowed to take naps or watch youtube on our desk on our breaks.
I seriously wonder what happened during his Christmas NY break. I'm not an entrepreneur so I have no idea if that is a right way to run a company or if Australia government just created new law. But surely I know this is when I say "New year, new company"7 -
I'm fed up of this shit. I'm a Bachelors student and I study in a class where no student wants to study. Like literally none. You'd think someone studying Bachelors degree would have some sense. But no. Not a fucking one of them. Our class requires a minimum number of students to attend to smoothly run the class. I am the CR and I can't convince them enough to even meet that level. How am I gonna get through these two years? I try to say something, everybody snaps at me for being a smartass. Which I'm clearly not. These are the same people who come at me when the courses to do finish in time. I am alone. I am getting too weak to stand against them. My self esteem is declining day by day. I am really insecure.13
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Web Developer with no common sense: “I’m going to query the currency calculator API for each of the 1000 records to convert.”.
Web Developer with common sense: “I’m going to query the currency rates API and use the calculation to convert each of the 1000 records.”6 -
My project at work (an electron/angular desktop app) has an exceedingly rare bug that causes it to crash-to-desktop while loading. Nothing about the bug makes sense, and there's no way to catch or detect it until the next run, and it happens 100% of the time for affected users.
There have been six confirmed cases so far (out of 500k+ users), and nothing linking them together. None of the fixes discovered by those users have worked for other affected users.
The worst part?
I was the first of those cases. I inadvertently fixed it for myself and haven't been able to reproduce it since.
I'm stumped!17 -
i'm feeling so sick right now.
PM invited team for today to present his "vision": "<name of our component>: what it is and what it is not".
but it didn't make sense and showed that he hadn't understood the problem at all. the whole architecture made no sense given the problems that shall be solved. his architecture diagrams missed some essential parts that were actually the giant weak points of his concept. his pseudocode, that should exemplify interactions between components, didn't address the complexity of required interactions at all. it's like he expects some magic to happen and has no fucking clue about the requirements (but acts like it), even though he is the manager of this software project.
and when devs ask really interesting questions that fundamentally question his concept, discussions lead to nowhere and questions are not answered. at some point he literally said "there is no such thing as <name of our component>, i still have to find this out"
really!? after one and a half year, since you sold the idea for this component to upper management, and after half a year of development, you still can't tell what it is what we actually want to build? are you fucking serious?!
at some point in discussion he said that these questions need to be answered but that "there's no time left", and he ended the meeting. although there was still half an hour of meeting time left.
i'm so fucking sick of this, i hate everything right now. i can't listen to this bullshit any longer. in discussions, he contradicts himself all the time, it is so fucking surreal i'm starting to feel like i'm insane.
it makes me really sad and tired. i don't want to care about this shit any longer.14 -
I started programming 7 years ago, but I downloaded my first tutorials on programming in C++ already back in 2000. I had read maybe 4 pieces of literature, didn't understand anything, because it taught things in this order 1, "So, say you want to create a cat?", no I don't. I want to make a useful program.
2, "then you have make a constructor and a destructor", makes sense since that perfectly replicates nature, not,
3, "then you can define a method in the class that enables your cat to meow", eeeh no it doesn't make a sound, what it does however is print a series of characters even less useful than "Hello World" to stdout.
Then I found assembler and it all made sense! 😀 -
Currently, I am going through a legacy application built in microsoft access back in 90s.
* No Comments
* No Relationships between tables
* Random code that does nothing
* Weird form layouts
* Weird naming conventions
I need to copy this functionality into modern version using SQL Server Management studio and asp.net core, I also need to kill myself because none of this fucking shit fucking fuck makes sense.
I do my best to write clean and concise code along with comments but after this ordeal I am going to up my game because nobody should need to suffer through spaghetti code and stupid logic that is uncommented.
😶6 -
What's the most bullshit marketing term you've heard being used? Something that sounds flashy for a non tech client, but makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.
I just heard "harnessing hyperconnectivity". The fucks that?3 -
I asked our customer at least 10 times if they really REALLY want the feature this particular way, because it absolutely made no sense..
Guess who got a bug (!!) assigned today in which the feature should be changed like I told them..........7 -
Apple's marketing department are just dictionary junkies.
Have you guys read some of the latest Apple quotes for their products? You know, the ones where you visit the page and there's some large bold text summarising the product? Here's a few:
HomePod: "The new sound of home."
If you talk over my Spotify music YOU WILL BECOME THE NEW SOUND OF MY SHED.
iPhone X: "Say hello to the future."
E.Musk put a Tesla in space. Also the future can crash with a single character.
MacOS: "Your Mac. Elevated."
If you fly away I WILL use you as birthday balloon.
iPad Pro: "Anything you can do, you can do better."
SOONER OR LATER *Comment what you would put here*
But I mean hey. It sells right.
Reading it back maybe I'm just blind hating.11 -
I've run into problems with the app I'm working on, the problems are related to issues regarding code.
No in fact it's related the last guy who wrote the app, the code has no comments and the variable names make no sense, the only comments in the code are blocks of code... With no reason as to why it was commented.
I have to add in some checks to determine if a person that has logged in is a full member or not (full member has access to the feature I've added) and the way the guy has made this app works makes no sense to me at all.
I've tried my best to avoid all contact with his code because it makes me want to yell out in frustration.
But for this one case I have to work with what's there.
I know I've mentioned this before but I've hit my limit yet again.
And for those who don't know this guy managed to scrape together skeleton code from two apps to make part of this app, rather than using parts of the other apps he left out code that was specifically made for the other apps, (majority of the commented out code).
One app was a taxi app and from the looks of it the feature he used was to get GPS location (which I don't understand before Google maps is a think after all... The taxi app USES Google maps), the other app is some sort of funeral webcasting app (I found code imports for it, without any actual code).
I don't actual understand how this guy could put this together without not thinking "maybe this is a bad idea"
Always code as if the person who ends up maintaining your code is a violent psychopath who knows where you live
I'm that psychopath right now..... Fuck that guy (don't know where he lives though)1 -
My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction.
So I packed up my stuff and right.2 -
Indian Product Management community is the shittiest community for any professional domain.
Everyone is just focused on being a guru preaching shit to others when they themselves no nothing about the function or possess any significant skill(s) to perform at their job.
A bunch of bozos, themselves struggling to stay afloat, are saving others. Fucking hilarious.
What makes this worse is that the entire community is so inclined towards "cracking the interview" and landing a job.
Instead what they should be focusing on is teaching them younglings what the role is and how to develop the right skill set. More importantly why the role exist in the first place.
That way, they will automatically land a good gig and solve critical user problems.
No wonder, most products these days are bloated with garbage and PMs are only focused on engagement, retention, and more fancy buzzwords which make absolutely no sense.8 -
I am always caught in the middle of Nerf gunfights as my colleagues love shooting at each other all around the clock.
And I hate it so much that I decided to remove all ammo from the battlefield.
No ammo, no gunfights. Does that make sense?
11 -
The state of informatics education is just saddening.
You study "Software Development" and then you get to do exams asking you to do some basic linux commands - with full internet access on a computer. People are allowed to fail this and study on. On the other hand you have to do real coding with pen and paper, have to calculate from hex to bin to dec and stuff and most Importantly - know about all kinds of math stuff completely unreleated to cs.
Graph Theory absolutely makes sense in my eyes, but not if it's plain fucken math without even mentioning computers or applications of it. But if you fail that everyone looks weird at you.
I know about coding. I got A's and B's in all the coding exams _without even doing much for them_ but then fail all the fucken math exams. Makes no sense. FML.8 -
Omg so I've been stuck on this function I'm writing that checks if a certain array value is so many characters long and well, it just wasnt returning false when outside the conditions..
I tried taking it step by step, echoing out every line and it all made sense to me and there were no syntax errors.
Time goes by and inside the configuration file I was testing.. I was changing the value of a DIFFERENT array property than what I was using in my condition. They looked really similar.. fml xD2 -
Another day on my tutoring job
This guy who's got no idea about what is he doing here (I had a rant before), runs to me while I'm helping another student. He interrupts me, shoves a USB key to my face:
[Student]: can you do something for me? Can you upload something on my ftp coz I gotta go now.
/*Each student in out school got personal ftp and submitting under the right directory is usually a part of an assignment and cost grades*/
[Me]: I can't, it's against the school policy
[Student (annoyed)]: But I have to go!
[Me]: can't help you, sorry
[Student (still annoyed)]: So you're not gonna do it, huh?
[Me]: No, sorry
[Student (passively aggressively)]: So I guess I'll get a zero for this one.
And he says it like it's my fault!
And he walks away. Me and students I'm helping are shocked. The guy is in his at least 50s. And no common sense whatsoever.5 -
Big title games
Console to Mobile: redesign the game to make it easy to play
Console to PC: just port the game, keep the console keys but remap them... randomly so it makes no logical sense and is impossible to remember or easy to press when needed (at least to me)
I guess ditching games on PC years ago was the right move but now I have A way overpowered computer... (Gonna take a while to get around to that ML stuff I had planned... Prolly taking a React/Native die first and maybe do some also for interviewing)8 -
Wasn't so much a question but...
Before WFH got so popular, I was interviewing at a place 50km from home, loyalty and stuff came up and the guy said something along the lines of "The only potential problem I can see is the distance. Now I get the sense you're quite a loyal person blah blah blah"
Half way into my third month they decided not to keep me after probation, after giving no negative feedback at any point prior to that then "we just need someone mors senior"
So yea, tune me about loyalty and then do that....
Also, if they needed senior why were they advirtising junior?2 -
When you haven't touched a project in a month and you decide you need to get back into it.
I have pages of dated notes, pseudo-code and function in the still need written. I have about 75% of the actual code up and functional, but I have no idea what I was working on when other things got in the way. I've been staring at this mess that I swear was once organized and made total sense and I'm completely lost.
Why do our brains do this!!
2 -
how to become a true scum master:
- formulate jira tasks for your inferiors as vague as possible, best they don't make any sense
- before sprint start, ask the subhuman being to estimate storypoints, and if they say they can't really tell with this description and choose the highest estimate, say "okay, let's estimate it to one sprint length", so they can actually work on it within one sprint (which makes total sense)
- if the scum dares to question the content of the ticket and begs for more details, be like teflon and give no useful answer at all. if they continue asking for a meeting to discuss the ticket, tell them to have a meeting with a coworker about it (who also has no clue). don't be available for them because you have more important stuff to do.
- bully them during daily standups that they didn't create clear subtasks from this task and criticize them because you have no idea what they are doing. tell them they are having performance issues and suspect them to sit on their lazy asses all day.
- criticize the team in general for bad performance, bad item tracking and never say something nice, to make sure everybody loses even the last bit of intrinsic motivation for the project.
stay tuned to learn how to make yourself a skull throne out of those filthy dev smartasses ^.^6 -
I've seen many devs doing crazy things in my entire career till now. But this one dude stands out.
He used to:
- Push binaries to git repo
- Use some old libraries which were used during Indus Valley civilization
- Had no sense of database and used to delete random data from it and call it as TESTING (Thank God! I never gave him prod access)
- And on top of this, he had an ass full of attitude!2 -
Me: I deprecate a react component, because it's bloated and no longer makes sense, and I let everyone on the team know that we're working to get rid of that component
Other Dev: Hmm, if I copy this component for every time that it is used, rename all of my copy's and delete the original, I got rid of the deprecated component...
Me: After hearing that deprecated component was removed... "Good job other Dev"
Me: A couple of weeks later after dev leaves company and I start adding some new features to the app "WTF" -
2013 Wanted to make games with unity, no prior experience. Failed horribly learning unity script. Nothing made sense.
2014 change in carreer from retail to sysadministration at a local small recycling company ( no prior experience other than being a digital native )
2015 Got bored at work, learned c# with scott lillys tutorials. It clicked!
2016 i enroll in cs at local university. Acing most classes, even got a b on the math module i took. I am 28 now and my life changed a bunch to the good thanks to coding, tech and cs.3 -
Came across this gem. Thought more people ought to see it. 😂 Guess no one in that repo had a sense of humor.
-
What grinds my gears:
IEEE-754
This, to me, seems retarded.
Take the value 0.931 for example.
Its represented in binary as
00111111011011100101011000000100
See those last three bits? Well, it causes it to
come out in decimal like so:
0.93099999~
Which because bankers rounding is nowstandard, that actually works out to 0.930, because with bankers rounding, we round to the nearest even number? Makes sense? No. Anyone asked for it? No (well maybe the banks). Was it even necessary? Fuck no. But did we get it anyway?
Yes.
And worse, thats not even the most accurate way to represent
our value of 0.931 owing to how fucked up rounding now is becaue everything has to be pure shit these days.
A better representation would be
00111101101111101010101100110111 <- good
00111111011011100101011000000100 < - shit
The new representation works out to
0.093100004
or 0.093100003898143768310546875 when represented internally.
Whats this mean? Because of rounding you don't lose accuracy anymore.
Am I mistaken, or is IEEE-754 shit?4 -
I'm very dependent on my sense of smell. I always smell whatever I eat or drink. Because of some stuff about my brain that my doctor told me and I forgot, this sense is very precise.
It's so precise in fact that in a closed room I can tell whether a woman is on her period or not. But we're blessed and we're also cursed – put any kind of paint, nail polish, rotten food, so-called "car perfume" near me and I have a headache until I get a full night of sleep.
Coronavirus however fucked up that feeling. When it initially disappeared I was panicking because I felt like a cat with his whiskers cut off. Now it's back and it's strong as usual, but it's different.
Now I can't eat chicken. No matter if it's fresh or not, if I smell chicken my brain just fucking nopes out and tries to vomit.
Corona sucks. Stay safe.37 -
Pet peeve #91847 - when your non technical manager routinely forwards you articles about technical subjects, usually written by non technical idiots, and says "please see if this is something we should be using".
Yeah, I get that your business manager friend has heard Blockchain is amazing, Rsocket is revolutionary, and everyone should now be using Kafka, but none of that makes any sense for our use case.
The clincher had to be telling me to look at AWS groundstation though. And no, we don't have anything to do with satellites...2 -
I gave up on learning math as a young person because no one was ever interested in teaching it in a way that made sense to me.
But as I’ve gotten older, I’ve started working on a pet projects that require understanding of (what I would consider) fairly advanced geometry, which as it turns out is called computational geometry. And it’s fun.
I just look back at the time I was afraid of this stuff with regret. All because my teachers weren’t terribly interested in teaching, but more interested in fulfilling useless metrics that only make it look like students are learning when they’re actually not.11 -
My CEO uncle: "anyone can program."
A quote from when we were discussing strategy for my sit down with the CEO of a company I was applying at (FYI, his advice was to research the company, be familiar with their long term strategies and such). I get that there's no need to prove my technical prowess to a business exec, but it isn't because "anyone can program."
I mean, sure, in a philosophical sense, anybody has the capacity to learn. But developers aren't a fungible asset. Treating them as such leads to ruin.3 -
How do you tolerate a colleague who
- Fails to work as a team member, is inherently lazy and writes software that is simply horrendous
- Blatantly takes the easy road and even admits to it
- Has no sense of pride in the work they do
- Is your supervisor11 -
Me: "Hmm. I should center this image."
img {
align-self: center;
}
CSS: "LOL, no. Intuitively, as a first logical guess at forgotten CSS syntax, that seems like what you ought to type. But this world makes no sense and my creator was a sadist. Here's what you actually need to do."
img {
clear: both;
display: block;
margin-left: auto;
margin-right: auto;
float: none;
}12 -
Main language, do people have such a thing? Some quixotic shit about various languages I use:
C#: Microsoft
F#: never quite committing to 100% functional paradigms while still being one of the most enjoyable langs I use
Java: null handling via optional and maybes are ugly, but better than it was
C++: surprisingly functional in 2020
Haskell: no one else seems to ❤️ it, despite it being fucking beautiful
Kotlin: Ternary warfare, Czech sports opinions on how languages should work
Clojure: parenthetical scoping makes me far happier than it should
Typescript: makes ever more sense as it changes7 -
If git was written in english or in ancient greek it made no difference. It's everything counter-intuitive and you have just to learn commands by heart and google the errors. Because nothing makes sense, even if you know how it works and you used it for years6
-
in Russian the word “шляпа” (fedora) means not only the specific hat but also something that makes no sense, something ridiculous or something of low quality.
So when someone sends you some spaghetti code on a review, you can just say “That’s fedora” and I love it. You can also WEAR a fedora and point to it as a response to someone saying something that makes no sense.
4 -
Anyone else have trouble with real life common sense?
Story time:
Yesterday Evening a dog chased my best mate's cat up a tree. Being the genius I am, I decided to climb after the adorable bugger. Fell from about 8-10ft onto concrete slabs on my back.
Main thing first: I got lucky, CTs and X-rays showed no lasting damage. I'm back home and safe now.
What got me was going through the hospital having to hear the story of how I fell out of a tree onto my back and head like an idiot... from medical person to medical person.
I was lying in the bed, thinking "I swear I'm competent!? Why do people trust me!?"
Does anyone else have any weird skill black spots, or common sense break downs?7 -
Today I found a critical bug to our software and wrote a fix and tested it locally.
Common sense would dictate that especially when it is critical you test said fix on a real release and not with a debugger attached and running onna different device altogether.
I was denied this request because the afflicted machines engineer would not be able to finish the machine before the factory acceptence test.
I stood there with glassed over eyes for a second and then to no avail tried to explain that without this fix he wouldnt even pass the internal acceptance test......12 -
Tbh my current job is as close to perfect as I can imagine ever existing. The best and smartest engineers I've ever met (better than Google, better than anywhere), all working on something we think is really really important (autonomous cars), and solving hard problems every day (some of which no one else has ever solved before).
Only downside is an internal sense that when I'm not working I'm delaying a product that will save people's lives.4 -
I was interviewing for a new position that would be primarily Android development with a chance that I would help out on iOS when necessary. When I got their coding challenge, it had to be done for iOS in Swift. Made no sense, but now I can say I finally wrote a project in Swift.
-
Is there's an "edit history" feature in DevRant. Some comments makes no sense after a post is edited.
I'm thinking of posting "Arch Linux and Firefox for the win. Who's with me?"
Then, when I have some comments, I'll switch it to "Windows 8 and IE for the win. Who's with me?"
That could ruin a lot of lives.5 -
My colleague has spent 3 days writing a responsive menu that has 5 items in it with no nesting that needs to move to a sidebar on mobiles.
I think that should be maximum 30 lines html and max 40 lines css. Or at least around that sort of area.
He has 150 lines html, 200 lines css, and is not even finished yet. He also made 2 entirely different menus for different screen sizes instead of using media queries...
The reasoning from all my colleagues is that its because the menu needs to use css grid (it doesn't they just randomly decided we can't use flex, float or online).
Working with people that give reasons for their garbage code that literally makes no sense every day gives me a headache....6 -
On iOS 11, Apple is no longer allowing you to open apps that are 32 bit. Apple should have given all the developers with 32-bit apps free access to the developer program rather than forcing them to pay a $99 fee to publish a 64-bit version of their app.
This would’ve made better business sense for them as publishers would have had an opportunity to create new apps and see more revenue coming in from upgraded apps. Ultimately more money for Apple. Not sure what dumb fool at Apple HQ thought this was a good idea.6 -
Our project at work goes live in 3 weeks.
The code base has no automated tests, breaks very often, has never had any level of manual testing
will not be releasing with any form of enforced roles or permissions in our first release now due to no time to enforce, however there is a whole admin api where you can literally change anything in our database including roles.
We also have teams in various countries all working separately on the same solution using microservices with shared nuget packages and they aren't using them properly.
Our pull requests are so big - as much as, 75 file changes - in our fe app that I can't keep up with it and I honestly have no idea if it even works or not due to no automated tests and no time to manually test.
We have no testing team, or qa team of any sort.
Every request into the system has to hit a minimum of 3 different databases via 3 different microservices so 1 request = 4 requests with the load on the servers.
We don't use any file streams so everything is just shoved in the buffer on the server.
Most of the people working on the angular apps cba to learn angular, no one across 2 teams cba to learn git. We use git so they constantly face problems. The guy in charge has 0 experience in angular but makes me do things how he wants architecturally so half the patterns make no sense.
No one looks at the pull requests, they just click approve so they may as well push directly to master.
Unfinished work gets put in for pull request so we don't know if the app is in a release state since aall teams are working independently, but on the same code base.
I sat down and tested the app myself for an hour and found 25 fe only issues, and 5 breaking cross browser issues.
Most of our databases are not normalised. Most of our databases make no sense. 99% of our tables have no indexing since there is no expertise with free time to do it.
No one there understands css properly. Or javascript.
Our. Net core microservices all directly use ef in the controller actions so there is no shared code there.
Our customer facing fe app is not dry because no tests so it was decided it was better this way.
Management has no idea on code state, it seems team lead is lieing to them about things like having any level of tests.
Management hire devs that claim to be experts but then it turns out they have basically no knowledge of what they were hired to do, even don't know what json is or the framework or language they are hired for, but we just leave them to get on with it and again make prs too big to review.
Honestly I have no hope that this will go well now but I am morbidly curious to watch. I've never seen anything like the train wreck that we are about to get experience.5 -
Just checked my work email to see what's coming in today....
And see someone on the London scheduled a 9AM meeting with me at 5:30AM my time.
Yes thanks for the advance notice...
Not going to be in the morning though and well the whole thing is BS based on some stupid new requirement that doesn't make sense.
Basically asking to migrate a while application to a new platform that no one understands yet.... Just to add a completely unrelated be feature...
Feature: 1month
Migration: 1 year based on the pre-reqs needed5 -
guess what i learned today?
i have no creativity whatsoever.
or at least in a design sense.
i bought a website my first website a few weeks ago and the main page looks, well, barfable.
orange on blue? i have no where near enough css experience to pull that off. i ended up trying to make it like a linux distro (zorin os), which is neon blue on black.
i asked for advice on the ux stackechange network, and of course, two people with a low reputation both answered, and of course of course, both their answers contradicted each other.
welp, fuck me.6 -
Do i like stickers? I do.
Does that mean that I consider myself a pro? No
I just like them.
So fuck you assuming things that don’t make any fucking sense.1 -
Man, people have the weirdest fetishes for using the most unreadable acrobatic shell garbage you have ever seen.
Some StackOverflow answers are hilarious, like the question could be something like "how do I capture regex groups and put them in a variable array?".
The answer would be some multiline command using every goddamn character possible, no indentation, no spaces to make sense of the pieces.
Regex in unix is an unholy mess. You have sed (with its modes), awk, grep (and grep -P), egrep.
I'll take js regex anytime of the day.
And everytime you need to do one simple single goddamn thing, each time it's a different broken ass syntax.
The resulting command that you end up picking is something that you'll probably forget in the next hour.
I like a good challenge, but readability is important too.
Or maybe I have very rudimentary shell skills.5 -
As I was browsing pornhub, I started reading articles about AI, dick still in hand, and went down the rabbit-hole (no pun intended) of self referential systems and proofs. This is something I do frequently (getting off track, not beating off, though I have been slacking recently).
Now I'm no expert but my neurotic DID personality which prompted this small reading binge DOES think it is an expert. And it got me thinking.
Godel’s second incompleteness theorem says that "no sufficiently strong proof system can prove its own consistency."
Then utilizing proof by contradiction, systems that are "sufficiently strong" should produce truth outputs that are monotonic. E.g. statements such as "this sentence is a lie."
Wouldn't monotonicity then be proof (soft or otherwise) that a proof system is 'sufficiently strong' in the sense that Godel's second theorem meant?
Edit: I WELCOME input, even if this post is utterly ignorant and vapid. I really don't know shit about formal systems or logic. Welcome any insight or feedback that could enlighten me.1 -
Which bastard thought that 'Spotifiy remote' is a good idea?
You never know what you control:
- your phone with your phone
- your laptop with your phone
- your laptop with your laptop
- your phone with your laptop
- your heart with your heartbeat
The guy invented that should get hit with a stick recursively until he cries 'Music should be played on the device that you can control'7 -
Legacy code huh?
Well i'd say it would be when i was workng on an old java app that was apparently written by a retard.
He had used strings to represent booleans for no apparent reason. As if that wasn't bad enough he would use different strings too:
Y N true false 1 0
He used them randomly too , y and 0
N and true
😡
I sense it was done on purpose
Perhaps he knew he was leaving soon2 -
Fuck Googles SafetyNet.
I wish for every developer who is responsible for this pile of shit to choke to death on a big fucking piece of chocolate.
SafetyNet is the most retarded piece of software that has ever been developed in the past decade. It does nothing but annoy everyone, randomly block people for no reason and being a gigantic pain in the ass. It has no purpose existing. The entire purpose of it simply does not make sense and is only used for marketing bullshit. The last thing I would trust my actually important shit with is a phone.
Fuck you, Google. Fuck you.3 -
FUCKING SHITTY PHP WITH NO FUCKING COMMENTS AND A JOKE OF A DOCUMENTATION WELL I DON'T FUCKING KNOW WHY THAT BUGS HAPPENING NONE OF THIS CODE MAKES SENSE AND IT APPEARS TO BE HELD TOGETHER BY DUCT TAPE AND PRAYERS AND IM GONNA LOSE MY MIND IF I SEE ONE MORE FUCKING 200 LINE FUNCTION WITH A NAME LIKE 'transformData' WHAT THE HOLY FUCK DOES IT DO I SWEAR TO GOD THIS CODEBASE NEEDS TO BE FIREBOMBED10
-
"The word ‘tokenizer’ makes a lot more sense, but ‘lexer’ is so much fun to say that I use it anyway."
No wonders people think a lot of programming subjects are intimidating.3 -
In VS Code, why may positive feedback be only 257 characters long, where negative feedback can be 270 characters long
4 -
Watching reviewers on a website review the new Eminem album 12 hours after its release is like watching a 10 year old review a scientific paper by Stephen Hawking with a quick skim.
Yes, the child should be entitled to their opinion. But No, no one with any sense should be listening to this child’s opinion.
If you gave a lil pump “album” a 7/10 and Kamikaze a 4/10 then your opinion is invalid, end of story.
But it’s all good. 95% of people are stupid and that’s just how it works, it’s nothing to be angry about. Just try to be in the 5%.
End of rant.8 -
Got asked to fix a bug at work. The code (react) looked like this:
file = form.file;
this.setState({file});
this.methodThatNeedsFile();
So i explained that the changes from setState are not adopted immediately etc. Then i take another look at the code and feel the pain in my head. You could shorten the code to:
this.methodThatNeedsFile(form.file);
Is there some subconscious need in the brain to make use of frameworks even though it makes no goddamn sense and "normal" programming is sufficient? -
There’s no such thing as quiet quitting. If working accordingly to the pay cheque and job description is called quiet quitting, why not calling
- every jobs are “quiet slaveries” .
- every banks charges are “quiet robberies”.
- every food I ate are “quiet shitting.”
- every gym rats are “quiet dieting.”
See? This doesn’t make any sense. Companies these days ….🤦♂️8 -
Send out some platform accounts. A few days later VIP Support writes me:
VIP: What did you think by writing to our client. He never used the platform or worked with anyone on there. Do you see any deeper sense behind that?!
Inner Me: I HAVE NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE OR WHAT YOU DO AND I DON'T CARE. If your name is on the list, I have to write you your account!!!
Me: Sorry about that. Someone put it on the distributor list. If you want we can delete it, but maybe he needs it in the future to collaborate.
Sorry for any inconvenience
VIP: ...1 -
When will X be finished?!
Um..I don't know cuz thing Y is blocking me from doing X implementation and it makes no sense.. I have no idea what is wrong with it and can't tell how long it'll take me to fix, hopefully by the end of today I'll have thing Y fixed enough so I can finish thing X..
Ok, will you be able to update production today?! Just put it on production when you're done with X.
Uuuumm... Yeah... // still need to know how X will behave in cases a, b, c & b+c...
I'm writing this while waiting for abc feedback.. this is going great.. :/
I know prod is not used as prod yet, but still... fuuuuu!!1 -
Found this gem in a comment from a couple of years previously:
// This shouldn't be here - needs moved to a separate handler. Likely to cause all sorts of weird bugs
No shit, Sherlock! Like the one I'm bloody trying to make sense of now!1 -
Why the hell people like Quora?
I hate that it forces me to sign in. I won't, because it makes no sense. Fuck it, my time is precious, don't play with it.
StackExchange is doing great by leaving information free for everyone and even allowing them to interact without an account.6 -
Ebay is great to find cheap laptops. However auctions always give me a false sense of happiness when no one bids higher than I do for 4 days and then 15 mins before it has to end I get outbid by 10 people?!?!?
Anyway bought a used Thinkpad x200 for 25 bucks, added in an SSD. Sweet.2 -
1. it like playing with lego, but for adults, and you have almost no limit
2. it's the best way I know to express an idea
3. I just love having the PC doing exactly what I tell it to do, even if it doesn't make any sense whatsoever -
The fuck is up with venv, conda, pip, pip3, python3, CRYPTOGRAPHY_OPENSSL_NO_LEGACY and "you can't install packages in docker based environments" DUDE STOP WHAT THE FUCK
How the fuck is that the scripting language of choice? It has by far the most confusing and messy runtime setup. Like it's easier to make sense of Javas version-shenanigans than this bullshit.
And then you think well what gives. Runs > python ...
"This environment is externally managed and you can go kill yourself, JUST LOOK UP PEP-666" LIKE NO YOU FUCK, JUST RUN THE FUCKING SCRIPT!
It's nice you thought about separation of versions but DOCKRR DOCKER DOCKER THERE ARE CONTAINERS WHY THE FUCK DO YOU DO SOME BULLSHIT WITH ENVS IN FOLDERS REQUIRING SOME RUNTIME BULLSHIT WHAT NO STOP WWHYYY7 -
Hey everybody been a while but I have a rant. Swift fucking swift and IOS dev. Okay so been learning swift for some frontend casual work, no worries they are lending me a mac to work in.
Now comes the rant part IOS is fine to work in I dont have any qualms about platform but.. FOR THE LOVE OF COMMON FUCKING SENSE GET SOME FUCKING CONSISTENCY.
You have made swift statically typed language to supposedly make developing more consistant and better fine no worries i dont like static typed languages cause they are unnecessary but fine. then you go NAH FUCK IT EVERYTHING IN A MODULE IS IN GLOBAL SCOPE, FUCK IMPORT STATEMENTS, FUCK MAINTAINABILITY AND FUCK YOU FOR ASKING.6 -
Programming is like a Word document, except that if you make a spelling or punctuation error, you get 100 highlights elsewhere which aren't wrong at all and make no sense.
Continuation of https://www.devrant.io/rants/433434 -
Whichever fucking cunt at Wordpress came up with that filthy Walker class and how a navigation item tree should be traversed, shall be hanged to death.
How fucking brainless can one be to create such a complete pile of donkey turds?!
No wonder Wordpress itself makes no sense at all nor has it any connection to any intelligent lifeform whatsoever.
Edit: This rant does not even closely show how high my fucking rage-level is!2 -
When you commit code to the repo and a a junior on the team takes it upon himself to rename all the classes and methods coz he doesn't like them even though his changes make no sense and then sends them to you for a code review .....
Wonder what the results going to be ;-p1 -
To whoever builds electron boilerplates.
STOP ADDING FUCKING JQUERRY AND WEBPACK TO THIS SHIT, I DONT EVEN USE YOUR BULLSHIT BUT OTHERS DO AND THATS WHY SO MANY ELECTRON APPS SUCK. WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND THINKS THAT THIS MADE SENSE PUT YOUR CSS LOADER ANAL PLUG IN TO YOUR ANUS AND BUNDLE THEM TO YOUR SINGLUAR BDSM.JS WITH BROWSER BACKFALLS AND BETTER MAKE SURE TO WHIPE YOUR DIRTY SHITFACE WITH A FULL BLOW CSS RESET BETTER MAKE SURE THERE IS NO ACCIDENTAL MOZILLA STYLE IN YOUR CHROME.3 -
Ken Thompson. Zero ambition but incredible achievements. Bottom up programmer, no bullshit, and a great sense of humor.
-
There are no stupid or dumb questions. A lot of headache has been and could have been saved by one person asking what seemed like a stupid question.
I would now expand on this to say that if the question is procedural in the sense that it’s asking “what” or “how”, you should make every attempt to come to an answer yourself and then ask for clarification. If the question revolves around “why”, there are no stupid questions. A lot can be overlooked in a cascade of moving pieces.2 -
Power tripping idiots who just chase brads for their personal gain without understanding the underlying scenarios are primarily driven by money and have no sense of responsibility towards others or their surroundings.
Fuck such money hungry job seekers.
29 -
You think americans are weird with their imperialistic units [inch, ounce, yard, pound, mile, ...]?
You think canadians are weird with their mixture of imperialistic and metric units [miles, liters, ...]?
Well I think we are all weird with our am/pm nomenclature when we start counting at 12 and end with 11 [12pm, 1pm, 2pm, ..., 11pm, 12-fucking-AM]
good luck making sense of that one!
"please run this command at 12pm sharp" -- is that noon or midnight? Did the chap writing this know which is which?19 -
Great googly moogly is Kotlin an ugly language.
If you are just starting out with Android or Java development in general, I highly recommend sticking with Java and avoid Kotlin like the plague. It feels like a meme language that was taken a little too seriously.
Full of little flowery nonsense that aims to make the language more human, but only serves to make it look like a child designed it.
I absolutely hate when a language doesn't require type declarations.
The "it" keyword rankles my underwear beyond belief.
Trying to build a dictionary/hashmap/hash felt like I was writing out an essay for school. In other languages it's straightforward and makes sense. Even PHP makes more sense.
I am obviously missing something here, because there is no way something so common and done the same way across different languages has such a wildly different approach in Kotlin.
I have as much experience with Java as I do Kotlin but it immediately makes more sense as a language and doesn't have all this flowery nonsense. It is verbose, which means I don't have to decipher what the code is actually doing when I read it.
I'm familiar with the enterprise Java meme, but I'm not writing enterprise Java, and that's not my style anyway so it doesn't affect me. But even so, that would be a million times easier to handle that Kotlin.14 -
Manager 101: Plan things ahead.
My manager: Hey let's move this complex server today (Friday) all hands on deck, no plan in advanced. Nothing.
Why so much people bullshit they way to managerial positions?10 -
Me: *opens devTools*
Firefox: yea bro lemme just ..uh.. hmm yeah so this is the css for the element, see?
Me: Thanks.
Me:
Me: this makes no sense, why would I ever do that?
Firefox: also you can't have width on an anchor tag. I can't put that rule into effect
Me: I didn't put any width on your inline element, you sure about that?
Firefox: yea try using display: inline-block
Me: No. I'll just delete that. *checks file*
Me: Maybe that line is wrong because IT DOES NOT FUCKING EXIST!
What is this shit? I just restarted you! What else do you need, a reinstall? Drink too much over the holidays?
It's like the css editor has become a shallow tray with rules on it, and as soon as you bump it a little everything spills over and then Firefox just thinks oops, I've got this font-size: 200% lying around, lemme stick this into the hr tag which makes sense because THERE CAN'T BE ANY TEXT IN IT.
9 -
Now that I'm home feels like starting a new life.
I had millions of these new life but I have no choice but to start again !
All I can say is that I just wish I was a robot ! Logical ... Restless ... Powerful ... Ever lasting !!
Non sense ! I know I can never be a robot !! -
"What in the name of hell? Why? No.. absolutely not. Jeeeesus. Holy cow!! Haha.. that's funny. No friggin way! Oh that makes sense..wait, that makes no sense. Screw it I give up."
-
AAAH, fucking aws. Why the fuck do you make documentation if it doesnt even make sense. I struggeled for hours to let your cock sucking Cognito work and I'm still fucking stuck. Why is there no proper documentation or tutorial available for nodejs. This pisses me the fuck off. I hate this piece of shit.
Ah... I feel better now. -
Gamemaker studio 2's 2019 roadmap just got released.. Still no Linux IDE (FFS) but it only took them how many years to realise that not every developer is a malicious cunt and give us the ability to disable to sandbox file system?!
I swear they add and change stuff that is so trivial instead of focusing on the engines major problems and absent features, eg. Can't use SVG graphics, the need to be exported in flash (SWF) because you know, makes sense?
17 -
THE FUCK MICROSOFT?! HOW COULD YOU FUCK UP ALT+BACKSPACE IN WORD 2016 WHAT IS THIS SHIT SUPPOSED TO DO IT MAKES NO SENSE, YOU CANNOT EVEN UNDO IT WHAT FAGGOT TESTED YOUR UI WHILE BEEING HIGH ON REDMOND DIRT. AND WHICH KIND OF MASTURBATING MONKEY IMPLEMENTED THIS SHIT.8
-
Why would companies ever hire a manager from a non-tech background, at least for managing engineers? After reading @IAmNotARobot's latest rant I just have to ask because it makes absolutely no sense to me. Surely non-tech people should be reserved for managing non-tech roles like sales, HR, and maaaaybe team leads, right? How can you manage someone if you don't understand anything of what they do?3
-
There's one thing I have most frustrated with, it's when a project manager has no technical knowledge.
They are like those people who makes you angry every time they open their mouth.
Thay just never makes sense and never understand anything.
Always wasting everybody's time.8 -
Mentors dont understand the power they have...
My mentors boss (non technical) will ask me to do something that either makes no sense or technically impossible. Without a mentor whos willing to say "that makes no sense to ask" or just "he will need an extra week to do it" can change an internship from a horrible nightmare to a great experience1 -
Ready for another look into my JIRA life?
Ticket Title: "The 'Selected photos' setting will result in users being able to select only one photo at a time."
Ticket Description: "This is not directly a bug, because this problem is caused by the selected setting. Here one would have to consider to give this option no more and/or with an error message the user on it to make attentive, how he can change the attitude."
I don't even have to worry about NDA in this one because it makes absolutely no sense.
BTW, we don't have a single text in the app with the words "selected photos"
99% sure the creator of this ticket wrote it when they were high, drunk, or both4 -
I just want to do nothing. Be a cat: eat and sleep as much as I physically can. I'm just physically and mentally exhausted and basically have no desire to do anything anymore.
Fuck everything.
The only thing which prevents me from doing that is some leftovers if common sense which tell me that it's unwise to abandon everything when you've left only 3 weeks to do shit and then it's not your problem anymore.
But even this sense cannot disarm an overwhelming procrastination.
And people. Fuck people. Only a very small minority is actually tolerable.
Thanks for listening to my TED talk.28 -
Just turned down an offer to become eCommerce Lead @IKEA Austria.
They got those messed up systems controlled by the headquarters in sweden and no clue of or sense for online or digitalisation...how I'm supposed to fix their organization culture... I'd only had freaked everybody out trying to disrupt their 'used' way of doing business :(
Wondering if that's gonna haunt me...3 -
I have been coding for 2 years, 1 month at a company
Teammate1 has been coding for a year, a genius, learns everything in a week, knows all major js frameworks, refuses to adhere to any rules except no rebase on pushed (luckily)
Teammate2 has been coding for a year, learns slowly, very reliable, has no common sense at all
Teammate3 the designer, really has the skills but always busy, never has time for a meeting, gets very mad if it looks different from her original plan.
We're all college students short of money so they all want to work for clients. I don't have the leadership skills / charisma for this.1 -
I (junior dev) hate it when my boss tells me to do things that totally don't make sense...
I'm managing an internal site which requires a login to access. Why the hell should I change every damn article in the cms, so robots meta tag is set to no index. It's behind a fucking login and Google won't be able to index it! (except the login of course)
...
I did it anyway.2 -
So AMD is introducing new CPUs with NPUs, aka Ryzen AI, for inferencing, but only for some of the lineup, making Ryzen AI even less relevant.
Not to mention that AMD comes up with new HW that nobody knows how to use, that no SW exists for, and...
Oh, wait. Making AI capable HW while completely failing on the SW side. Now it makes sense. It's just AMD being AMD.4 -
All the crypto bots and hire a hacker adverts make no sense. After all, they still need to either go through the API or make a selenium script. Will still take them 1 to 2 hours at least to build it. For what?
To advertise to a dying platform that has a dwindling community, which is on top of it well-versed in programming and technically affine, so that the probability of profiting of it is tiny...
My conjecture: A devrant member is pulling a long running prank.
I bet it's someone like theRealJase. Or someone like that.7 -
Working with Apple subscriptions from Dotnet Core backend. Their API makes no sense IMO. Loved so much working with Stripe, but we had to support In-App Purchases aswell.
Made a small easter egg for futre developers to find. (unreachable code).
1 -
I fucking hate SO ! No sense of gratitude at all.. :/ Fucking arrogant fucker's ..One thing I've realised during answering question's in SO..It's like a bitch ! You should bang and throw it,shouldn't think about loving it.10
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I'm currently founding a startup right after graduation. As the CTO with no employees at the moment I'm like every position in the company related to dev and Ops. It's the biggest challenge I've faced as a dev so far. Though I really learn a lot and grow mature pretty fast and it is challenging in a good sense from a technical perspective, I'm facing hard personal problems like insecurity in decision making, doubting my skills since I'm definitely no senior and a mid to high effectiveness to stress.
I've mixed feelings about the pure speed and developments right now, but the good side of things is far more exciting then the bad side is frightening.
What truely pisses me off though, is the missing time to spend here on devRant. FUCK. FML.
Have a good (REST) weekend.4 -
I knew I wanted to be a device in college when I found out about it and it all made sense. I loved computers, video games and programming seemed like a no brainer. Now I'm happily developing and graduated with a computer science degree.6
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It's so early but i'm brimming with excitement and need to share...
I might be going NUCLEAR guys!
In the very literal sense, don't overthink it (and no i don't mean blowing stuff up, and no i don't mean boomer fiSsiOn, I mean the real stuff - fusion!)8 -
After previous rant (https://lynkz.me/9xAFVZ9) he told me to be as close as possible to the design from the designer. There was on the left side a BarCode, which made no sense. So I didn’t add it. Now today (saturday) he told me I need to add the barcode because it looks classy. I told him we had a QR code already with same data. His anwser, yeah but it looks better with Barcode added too. Just f*** off! Your classy, shitty barcode will have a great price as it’s weekend. Thanks @linuxxx for the url shortner, it’s awesome!9
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Client wants something that makes no sense in UX land. We tell them that it makes no sense. Client doesn't listen, tells us to do it anyway.
We do it anyway. Client has doubts about a small detail of the implementation. And asks us what our advice would be.
My advice would be that you start listening to the professionals. How am I supposed to give "advice" on a detail of something I disagree with in general?
Her: "I'm going to cut off one of my hands."
Me: "I recommend you do not do that."
Her? "Would you cut off the left or the right hand? I can't decide."
Me, saying: "I have no preference in this."
Me, thinking: "You should cut off your fucking ears, you're obviously not using them."2 -
I'm not sure if it's just here, but in my country dev teams are not very organized. Most teams i've seen have no sense of process and they overlook testing.1
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School's principle: *is being unclear of what is asked*
Me: *asks lots of questions to try to understand*
SP: *keeps being unclear*
Me: *think I understand, I'll do something that will match with what I'm supposed to do*
-- 2 days before due date --
SP: omg stop it's not that at all
Me: wait wtf you told me that 3 months ago
SP: yOu uNdersdtoOd wHat yOu WaNtEd, tHat'S a ProBlEm yOu rEaLLy nEed To fiX
HOW ABOUT YOU GO AND DIE SOMEWHERE YOU SON OF A BITCH
Now I have until monday to write 30 fucking pages of something that keeps making no fucking sense. FUCK !2 -
Dear windows.
HI! IT'S ME! ETHAN!!
Why do you take TWO FUCKING HOURS!! To install a god damn UPDATE????
Your update system makes NO DARN SENSE.
Sincerely, Ethan.13 -
Don't translate your shitty software automatically dipshits. I'd rather have no translation than one that doesn't make any sense1
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Hate it when customers are acting like they know everything about IT and then say things that make absolutely no sense ... 😡
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What's worse than a StackOverflow question with no answers? An open GitHub issue, no comments in the last three months, and a sense that you just hit the ultimate bug the vendor will never fix.
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I don't think it could be more .net core than this: Several parts of the application ended up failing because of a too long URL. For example we used a List to store selected items in an array and they each looked like this:
&model.selectedIds[n]=true
The server side made more sense but we were running late with the project so we just went with it and hoped no one would use this feature. -
!Dev
So I'm at Brazil Day in NY, took me $6 and 1.5hrs to get here but know what I'm here I feel spending $5 for street food snacks is too much... Like they're price gouging too far...
But in other contexts, I have no problem dropping $$$ for food... Pretty much daily...
I'm not sure how I should make sense of this or justify it. Maybe that's the difference between paying cash and swiping?3 -
As a moron, I write all tasks in this format even though it makes no sense to do so, so I won't have to put up with business colleagues moaning.7
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Fun day at work.
Client sends me requirements over WhatsApp voice notes.
Says he can't send email because hes too tired.
His Requirements don't make sense.
I figured out what he wanted and then rewrite the requirements using simple language and less jargon.
Hes not happy. I reduced two paragraphs of his "requirements" to a single sentence which make more sense.
His voice notes seem like rambling.
Ugh.
He comes up with features for this webapp that cannot be tested unless you build the companion app which is coming up later.
Now he wants us to design the screens for the app which we will have to use our designer for.
Expensive. Considering most of his app is not completely thought out.
I have no idea what to do now.
We still haven't completed the requirements.1 -
I never wanted to be a programmer. I spent years in education being confused and bombarded by information that was poorly explained and made little to no sense.
Then in my final year after having a basic understanding of the building blocks, I just sent out to solve a problem >I< had.
It all just clicked into place and it turns out I had learned but perhaps didn't have an appreciation of how to apply it.
I'm guessing my education was too theoretical and not enough practical. -
My weirdest dream about programming?
I was sitting with my buddy and we were programming, and literally, verbally arguing with compiler that he should compile, and he was spewing out different errors each time we compiled, and it somehow matched our arguments, so it literally was "replying" with different kind of errors ;-;
I mean, we didnt change code, but tell to compiler "no, no, no, you dont understand. This error is wrong, becouse here and there is this and that and it just should work" **pressed compile again and gets different errror**
Yes, that was after few nights of c++.
Edit:
yes, in that dream compiler was spewing out bullshit errors that didnt made sense.2 -
How does the created time work in Devrant's API?
I get 'created_time': 1563478239
It makes literally no sense13 -
RANT: So in school, we have to program using some kind of pseudocode.
Today we wrote an algorithm from a previous exam. Apparently, they don't give you a mark if you get the Array.length(). To receive the mark you have to have to use a variable.
WHICH MAKES ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE TO ME.
My teacher said it would even be ok to define a variable like Variable = Array.length. THAT MAKES EVEN LESS SENSE5 -
Quality != more work + less talk
Quality = more talk resulting in less work.
That makes no sense mathematically.
“Let’s talk more about shit before we create shit”.
That’s a little better.
“Let’s talk more so we don’t create shit”.
Getting closer.
“Let’s talk more about what is needed till we all know what is best before we program a damn machine?”
...This is going nowhere fast.
Okay fuck it. Let’s just code some stuff. It’s more enjoyable.7 -
With his last tweets (and the last days), Musk has shown he is a total fraud.
This thousand requests story was possible to check just by installing a Wireshark-like on Android.
And I remember having a CTO exactly like this. Always an opinion on every damn technical thing, often making no sense at all and all the time totally off.
Which drives me to this conclusion :
If you are a CTO/CEO/C Bullshit O, go back to your damn office, fill your paperwork and for the sanity of every engineer, shut your mouth.22 -
When I began my career, I always thought everyone in the IT-sector loved their Jobs (except a few people who didn't fit in of course) - 10 years later I've met a lot of people who hated their jobs but didn't just quit it (no kids, no wife, no responsibilities at all) - what do you guys think about this?
Personally, I'm looking for a job where I can put my heart into and which has got a meaning for me (haven't found it yet and I don't expect to do in a short time) because everything else makes no sense to me. -
Have you ever thought to send a security code to the email the user put in the sign up form just to say him later "the password must contains at least 8 characters, etc." and ask him to fill the form again from scratch?
Who is so dumb to put the input check in this order? Honeywell.
- The email is correct?
- Ok, send a code and ask to confirm it
- The password meets the requirements?
- No, ask to confirm the email again just for fun.
I'll just ignore the waste of server resources to send N * Number of users emails for no reason.2 -
Real, seriously honest feedback wanted.
What do you do when you are stuck at a place that has potential but it is being run by someone with the wrong idea?
For example: not to toot my own horn, but I shine at front end Development. Not just slicing up designs, but seriously creating amazing user experiences. And honestly, there is no shortage of work for that ... every client we have has an expectation that their site or application will look awesome. And we have some very big clients.
That said, the manager truly believes that we are all inter-changeable and should have no preference. As a result, John Doe over there who has zero ability in front end gets tasked with building the front end of what should be an amazing app... while I eventually get tasked with some sitecore bullshit that I have no interest in.
And it goes on and on and on.
It is no coincidence that anytime the dice land on me for front end, it wins an award and always ends with an awesome thank you from the customer.
I am not sure what to do, because it just makes no sense to me. And this is just one example of the mismanagement.
Any help?2 -
I'm currently sitting in a hockey arena owned by my city, they offer free wifi, and cause I'm privacy conscious, I try to download a VPN for my computer. The motherfuckers block the download under the vague "violation of use policy" bullshit. Even better, I read the ToS they give you when you connect, and it says sweet fuck all about prohibiting downloads. What the fucking fuck do you have to gain from me not using a god damn VPN. It just makes no god damn sense.3
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I use a DasKey Ultimate with blank keycaps at work and people always ask how the hell I can work with that board. I recently bought a Happy Hacking Pro for my tablet/laptop and I must ask the same question to those who daily drive these..
How the fuck do you deal with this retarded layout??
I used the dip switches to at least change the Del to BS but the physical key is stupid small, the control key position is just idiotic and no dedicated arrows? I use VIM and my work desktop is Linux and I come from a UNIX background. Still makes no sense.
</rant> -
Finished && deployed a big release yesterday (like the main component, only changed in 4-5 times over the years).
You know the mental state of "ahh it's done"
I couldn't even savour it and theres needless work given to me just-because. It ain't urgent, it ain't high-priority, and IT'S A FRIDAY TODAY? :v
No wonder the smarter-than-me predecessors left this job. One can't even get a sense of satisfaction after putting that amount of thought and work.1 -
Today was:
Fuck it, this API makes no sense I'm tired of trying to make sense of it...
-clickity-
-clickity-
-clickity-
-clickity-
-clickity-
OMG this makes more sense, why didn't I do this at first?1 -
So I was thinking about SSL and trying to understand it (random thought that just came up while eating lunch). I came up with this analogy, not sure if maybe I've heard it before... Is this understanding correctly?
A and B want to send letters but make sure no one other than them can get in on the conversation or impersonate them.
Each is able to create a pen and glasses that must be used to see the ink.
So when they first connect, they exchange the pens.
So even if a middle man can duplicate the pen he can't actually read what anyone is saying. And if he tried to write something, the receiver will know it's not sent by the other since it makes no sense. So they then write a new letter and agree to send each other new pens and use new glasses?1 -
I just reviewed a pull request with a test case like (pseudo code):
# Test MyService
const mock = createMock(myService.myMethod)
.whenCalledWith("foo")
.returns("bar");
assert(mock.myMethod("foo") === "bar"));
Why though? Why are we testing the mock? What is happening here? This test has no reason of being there instead of a fuzzy feeling that we now have unit test to lure us into a false sense of security.
I asked why we don't do an integration test. Response was: "They are slow."
Well, duh, but at least they would actually test something.
What do you gain by asserting that the mock is working the way you set it up?3 -
devRant suggestion: Comment Bump. Bump up the comments on a rant, the ones with most upvotes get bumped up to the top. Possible pitfalls, where comments have replies which could break the order and make no sense. I guess I just talked myself out of that one. Meh.4
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Once took over a bunch of webservices from a coworker who had found another job.
Worst bunch of copy-pasted, anti-pattern, duplicates-ridden, dead-code infected spaghettimess I ever saw.
I spent a year getting that shit into a semblance of order. You could tell for certain the guy had no professional pride or sense of maintainability.
The kicker is, after that year of getting everything in shape, I got laid off due to cutbacks.
'Hey, great work, Refactor Ninja!
Now leave, you must be needed elsewhere!'
🙄 -
Following my last rant, my current employer told me it wasn’t right for me to assure a job first without telling him first I was planning on leaving.
How does that even work? Am I the only one who thinks that makes no sense at all?15 -
I kind of miss abbie boi doxxing randos, avoiding all responsibility, arguing against all reason and just generally making no sense… that was fun.
Now we only have Kaine’s avatar making absolutely no sense at all. So boring…5 -
You know what's worse than reading someone else's code? Reading someone else's code with comments that make absolutely no sense!
It's like deciphering hieroglyphics. If you're going to comment, at least give me a hint, not a riddle.
It's not a treasure hunt; it's coding!2 -
What possesses executives to create these ridiculous deadlines? They have no idea what's involved in the process of developing their application. In fact nobody does. So what we set deadlines first and figure out what we have to do second ? Does that make sense ?
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Every once in a while the flexibility of dynamic types comes back and bites you in the ars:
So I created method that returns the date significance (day, month, year) or null when no date is set.
I chose a class constant DAY with the value 0.
This is not a problem in if statements as I always use === but in this case a switch made more sense. And as you can guess no date set (NULL) was handled in the self::DAY (0) case... 😐😑😶 Silently resulting in wrong results when no date is given! #£#@$& (and other comic swearing symbols)
Even though php7 finally has decent type hinting resulting in much clearer defined API's we can still go very wrong.
More love to Go for less verbose static typing! To bad we can rarely use it at the office 😥2 -
I have a PHP related question.
I noticed a few frameworks make use of this structure of code and it makes absolutely no sense to me. There would be a PHP file, and the contents of the file would be as follows:
<?php
return [
‘a’ => ‘b’
];
My only understanding is that this is an array/object but I have no idea how these values would even be accessed.
Like, there is no array variable, how can a php file simply return something into a void? There isn’t a function or variable to catch that array.
How does this even work?23 -
I’m not suicidal. But It’s scary how much I envy people I know who recently died. They have zero problems. No need to look for a job, like I have to right now. No sense of fear or anxiety about screwing up relationships. No worry about health or wealth or any of that. Just done. Like I said, I’m not suicidal. Too scared to hurt myself and too afraid that on the other side I would regret it (yes, i happen to actually know it’s not just blackness and non-existence). But if I got hit by a bus tomorrow, I wouldn’t complain.11
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A constant fight because the code style matters. If you think it doesn't, just go and die already.
If any of you great folks with no sense of code style are reading this, fuck you, fuck you all, you should leave your jobs and yes I am talking about these assholes who have like 15-20 years of experience in the industry but surprisingly I never heard of anything they made.1 -
IntelliJ, IntelliJ I love you but please tell me why making a jsp file from scratch doesn't work in the servlet but your template for a jsp does. It makes no fugging sense to me. StackOverflow doesn't know and I went there for help.
I was debugging that shit for 5 hours today over an issue that was fixed in 3 minutes. I need ice cream.
2 -
I fucking hate that in JavaScript we have the naming convention of index.js for entry points, whyyy? no sense, thanks node7
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I got the logic for the time off rules wrong .. or rather the people who wrote this didn't bother to have the functions make sense. There's an `effective()` function .. which also includes all the holidays for previous years (how the hell are they still effective?!).
I'll just ask in the time-off room ... oh look ... no one has posted any chats in here for months. It's all just log messages. I bet everyone has it muted.
I hate working on this shit.2 -
Hey, privacy guys, I've recently decided to switch to DDG, and I just came across this DDG browser addon. It promises things like
"block all the hidden trackers", which is what AdBlock can also do, "force sites to use an encrypted connection", which makes no sense since most websites using https will redirect to https automatically, "Search Privately", which is already supported by them without installing the add-on, and "Decode Privacy Policies" which is the only feature that seems to be useful. Should I use it?3 -
In a class right now. The rants are more interesting than what the professor is teaching!
How our professors teach:
Step 1: Open up a PDF of the subject book.
Step 2: Read everything line-by-line.
Step 3: "Refer the internet".
Yeah, because I don't have the book to read the shit you're teaching.1 -
You know what makes no sense and sucks?
I call it "metamedia" (whatever dafuq the genre is actually called).
I mean these books/podcasts/movies about how someone did something. Actually more or less it's just a biography of some dude who did something somewhen, called "The <name of dude> principle". And most of them could be just a really long interview in some newspaper. But there is no money in newspapers, right? Better publish it as book and all the other platforms/things used for enjoyment before this storm of biographies started.
Audible is full of these and I do enjoy informing myself about the success of some Elon Musk but at some point its fucken enough.:D -
Fighting a CDI dependency injection problem that makes no sense. The only thing that sucks about the magic of DI is troubleshooting it when it doesn't work.1
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Screw some PHP builtin functions, why does imagecreatefrompng require a quality modifier between 0 and 9 and imagecreatefromjpeg one from 0 to 100, makes no sense!2
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I'm so frickin' frustrated with school stuff right now. I have to submit all assignments as .doc or .docx files, but nothing hates me more than WYSIWYG text editors. Nothing ever works as it's supposed to and I keep thinking to myself: "If I could just submit an HTML file, this assignment would've been done already..." 😕7
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I've spent the last 3 days trying to figure out what on earth was going through the head of a (now departed) contractor when he wrote the code I'm trying to fix. Took a reasonably simple part of the system and convoluted it to the point where it makes no sense! And we've realised it's not complete either!! Fun times... they are not. 😕4
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Was talking with a friend about how it makes no sense that people are freaking out over Canada 150, since the real big anniversary happened 22 years ago1
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“iPhones powered by lenin
Nice to have legs”
Another kiki dream. I wrote this down at 6 am, then fell asleep again. I have NO CLUE what it means. It made sense then, but makes none now.1 -
My dev super power would be to read client's minds before a design call and eradicate their stupid ideas for a website that make absolutely no sense. Save us all a headache.
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Aaarrgghhh! That piece of crap build system we use is acting again. Nobody touched it, nobody had time to replace it with something reasonable and now it starts not building as far as I can tell random parts of system. I guess it can sense we wanted to release :-/ So no time for any nice project and back to kicking its shit together :-(2
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I must say the worst thing is the whole "branding" of closed and open source software. Giving systems/platforms/repositories/projects/libraries names that makes no sense, just for the sake of standing out. Just god damn call a shoe for a shoe...the difference lies in the creator/maintainers and not in the fucking name...sry
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I'm currently interviewing, but I'm so exhausted that I am seriously considering to quit without having a new job. When I look at that legacy mess and try to make sense of it, my monkey brain just says "no".2
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All the C# developers will get this. I’m a C# developer myself. When I go on GitHub, all of the c# GitHub wikis, comments, and issues are very professionally written, even the amateur comments are worded like a stackoverflow question. It’s great.
I stumbled across a popular JS GitHub repo (https://github.com/tessalt/...) and reading the comments made me so happy to be a developer of enterprise level languages with structure, patterns and conformity.
Sure JS has all these things, but JS also has a boatload of “self taught” (I’m self taught too) developers with no patterns, no sense of scalability, or systems integrations, or sense of how to write meaningful comments and discussions44 -
There is an idea of a perfect woman. Some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me. Only an entity. Something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours, and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable, I simply am not there.2
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!Rant
Why in hell did we try to get smart with this shit!? As simple as storing 2 values and reading them... But no... Someone wanted to get pretty with it, stored the two values but just read one because the other can be calculated...
Makes sense (btw it's [field] in minutes and [field] in seconds)... Some problems:
1. Why? Oh because someone designed it as int...
2. Why not just in seconds? Fuck you that's why...
3. Who the fuck thought that getting seconds from minutes is better then getting minutes from seconds when we only store integer values?
Thank you... I feel better4 -
From HTML CSS javascript to some voodoo WPF xaml and c#, mvvm and databinding dependency inject cluster bomb to my brain god Microsoft just put a tutorial out like a normal group of people. where you do examples of projects. I'm 2 weeks in and this still makes no sense5
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How the fuck did we went from too little chars for naming, to too many chars, and managed to keep the same fucking lack of sense???
How the fuck is that better?
Before we had 2 letters var names, and now we have to scroll right to read them, and it still has no fucking direct meaning!!!!
How the fuck createMongoServerClientConnection is a good fucking name?!?!?!?! It has no fucking meaning!!!!15 -
Finally an error I can understand with ease. Up until now, I’ve been getting these weird arbitrary errors that make no sense to me.
I tried to wake my MacBook and the thing hung. I have it some time, and it restarted, restored all windows, and let me know it was a “Sleep Wake Failure”.
Honestly I don’t mind getting an error occasionally. But when the error says “UNEXPECTED_KERNEL_MODE_TRAP” while I’m gaming on Windows, it annoys me.
Also having WebKit crash the webpage on me without telling me what happened also gets me mad.
TL;DR: Make understandable error messages.2 -
N64 emulation possible on Nintendo hardware? Are you SUUUUUUURE???
According to GBATemp:
Wii:
CPU: Single-core PPC, 729MHz
GPU: 243 MHz single-core
RAM: 88MB
Possible? Yes (always full-speed)
New 3DS:
CPUs: 2, Quad-core ARM11 (804MHz), Single-core ARM9 (134MHz)
GPU: 268MHz single-core
RAM: 256MB
Possible? No
Switch:
CPU: Octa-core (2x Quad-core ARMv8 equivalent), 1.02GHz
GPU: 307.2MHz-768MHz (max. 384MHz when undocked)
RAM: 4GB
Possible? Barely (5FPS or less constant, only half the instruction set possible to implement)
this all makes total fucking sense
7 -
When my brain was overloaded and overwhelmed during rapid-cycling bipolar disorder, my life and my thoughts were a complete mess. Somehow, when I heard or imagined plurals of certain words, like "cans" or "cups", my brain painted pictures of a cute civilization of living soda cans. They fought oppression that came from us humans, but lacked mental capacity to do so. I felt really sorry for them and wanted to help. The more ordinary the word were, the more striking effect it had on me.
The rapid-cycling fashion of bipolar disorder is often triggered by unfit prescription medicines. This kind of disorder is among the most lethal mental disorders there are, with a huge percentage of patients committing suicide.
If you can't make sense of your thoughts, if your emotional responses seem inadequate or too strong, to the point when you can collapse crying after some random thought, stop whatever you're doing and seek help. Ask friends and family to find you a psychiatrist, as by the time you need help, you may lack mental capacity or emotional resource to find a doctor by yourself. To me, even the idea of leaving my bedroom and going somewhere was painful to think about.
If your thoughts appear to be "put into your brain" against your own will, if they make no sense, don't attempt to make sense of them. They are nothing but a random noise produced by overwhelmed synapses. -
These new pet options are nice and all. But why so unrealistic? I mean there is no way to put the cat on the keyboard. Nor an option for CRT monitors with cat on top. I am horrified by the lack of sense and mostly dissapointed. 5/7 would still choose a ground cat though.4
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When I need to talk to another office in my company about how one of their codebases works the weirdest thing happens. I end up on a call after local business hours with people who don't write code and thus cannot help me.
I show them the error I'm getting trying to run their shit and I get a high level buzzword filled spiel about the project that makes no actual sense. They use these technical words like federated and dynamic but they don't make sense in the contexts they're using them. And they don't answer my goddamn questions.
It turned out their debug config file was gitignored. -
6hrs trying to get a static and dynamic cell working in Swift. Xcode crashes and not a fucking thing was saved! My git commits make no fucking sense!4
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Current task: take a word document of test cases and turn them into code.
My issue with this: the document appears to have been written by a drunk 10 year old with no knowledge of the system or development in general.
Half of the English makes no sense in the document, let alone the technical points.
My favorite mistake that is all over this document, "this will not cause an error but will reboot the system" they're the same thing in our context, raising the error reboots the system.
I want to cry. -
I feel the need for a personal AI is real. I mean at this stage of my life I feel replacing humans around/close to me with a strong AI.
The idea is kinda creation of a strong AI but control its learning ability limited to one user.
Pros:
You have someone who understands you completely.
Knows what/how to talk no matter How's your mood.
Could be used to calm down the user even in critical situations.
Besides, if something doesn't workout just fucking tweak the code its yours no matter what the fuck you do with it.
Do I make sense??3 -
Fuck Java. Why does the syntax have to always give me such a headache. It is a language where I know what I want to do, have a general idea of how to do it, and have no fucking clue what the syntax looks like.
My guess is that it all makes sense after 3 years of use. I don't want a Java job, I just want to pass my class. Fuck Java.5 -
Can you tell that fucken Barracuda VPN Client to only route specific domains to the connected vpn?
It makes no sense to route my whole fucken traffic through my workplace's network. -
Weekly Out-Of-Context Thread
I'm looking for comments on rants. Not just any comments people, but comments that are non-sequiters, comments that are hilarious, or make no sense when taken from their original rant.
Anyone participating should link back to the original post to give credit. It would be great to get some regulars in here, but ideally we can prod some people into action that aren't on as much.
POST for our AMUSEMENT SLAVES! POST FASTER I SAY! FASTER!3 -
Most illogical thing I had to do today.
Today i received an email from bank to fill an attached form to receive payment from a foreign country.
Face palm no 1: The form they sent was in doc format. The layout of the form was all fucked up.
So I downloaded a proper PDF version of the same form from the bank's website.
I filled the form on my computer and signed it using my pen tablet and emailed it back.
Few hours later somone from bank calls me.
Facepalm no 2: He sounded frantic. He asked me to physically mail the "orginal" of the form!
He was thinking I took the printout of the form, filled it by hand and send the scanned copy.
I told him I filled everything digitally so there is no "original" form in physical sense.
Also since I emailed him the form, it doesn't make any sense at all, for me to take the printout of the digital version and mail it to him when he could just open his email and take a print out.
He didn't seem to grasp that idea at all.
Finally, I agreed to go to a branch nearby me and got him speak to an employee there over my phone and they said they will courier the printout to him.
I don't know if the people there are dumb or I am too smart.3 -
Why on Earth is React.Component.state public? This doesn't make any sense. It has no significance, but it just feels so, so stupid.2
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It'd be nice to be able to hover over the wkNNN tag to see that week's topic. As I browse through rants, many make no sense out of context.1
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When Windows 10 will let me install the .NET 4.6.2 SDK and I can compile my application, but I go to run it appearently the framework isn't installed.
Ok, doesnt make any fucking sense, but sure I'll download the runtime not the SDK. I start uo the runtime installer "Error: .NET 4.6.2 is already installed".
Um no fucker it's not. Look around and Microsoft says that .NET 4.6.2 comes in the Windows 10 Anniversary update. Which I have....
Says to check the registry to see what version I have installed. I have the correct update number, but it says only .NET 4.6.0 something is installed.
Great...2 -
The forEach in JavaScript makes no sense. It looks like a map /filter/reduce but doesn’t actually return the array. Can you please loop like a normal language?8
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Me : Ok, let's GOOO. Migration of bunch of projects (Front, back, helpers, async workers etc) to .net 8 from .net 6.
Couple of hours later :
Me : yeah ! It compiles !
Couple of hours later :
me : Shit yes ! It's working. tested all major functionality. No problems !
me : Creating PR
A day later :
QA : The names of day in datapicker are now in upper case.
me : LOL
Qa : Crickets
welp. Welp. Actually that make sense, necause brefore day names were autotranslated in Chrome randomly. like "Mon" was considered a french word and traslated into "y"
QA : crickets.
I'm gonna force push this PR lol -
This is really a rant:
The company i work for uses the wso2 enterprise integrator for message transformation and so on.
I am in charge to get this thing to work.
And i am so annyoid about this fuc**** crap software, there price it as lightweight, fast and easy to use?
EASY TO USE?????
Who the fuck there had the IDEA to use XML as configuration files.
They have kinda no documentation, even searching the web makes no sense because you only can find there crap documentation, once i searched after another problem and found my own Stackowerflow question, which had a totally different term!!
And i guess they are making no testing, i mean if i want to edit a api and i set one bracket false or so, than if i click on save, i am doomed, BECAUSE IT DELETES THE CHANGES WITHOUT WARNING ME, i mean srsly are you kidding me wso2???1 -
literally the last fucking thing i need to work for my mvp is ffmpeg to fucking work. i literally need to add audio at various start times in the video, sounds so easy right? too bad its a complex, cryptic, and horrible peice of shit.
no wonder stackoverflow is full of ffmpeg garbage
imaging writing a novel to run some audio / image editing commands, jesus christ
🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡
still at it 3 hours later, this should NOT be that hard ITS ALMOST FUCKING MIDNIGHT NOW YOU DUMB FUCKS FUYCK YOU FOR BUILDING THE MOST CONVOLUTED FUCKING SHIT EVER GOD I. AM. SO. SICK. OF. SHIT. LIBRARIES. WITH. SHIT. DOCS. SHIT. USERS. AND BULLSHIT. NO. FUCKING. SENSE. APIS.2 -
!rant
My family has been very supportive, but mostly ignorant about my journey to software development, and tolerant of all of my fuck-ups along the way.
Yet they don't dare to even think to know what I am doing, because every time they asked me, no matter how well I explained, they never got any of the intricate parts of software development.
They know I make software. They know about the usual stress that comes from organizing projects, planning, maintaining infrastructure, but to them, it's as if I build buildings or I'm like a single-man conveyor that creates cars. It makes sense, and they will never understand how I do it, and they don't care. -
I really hate how steep the learning curve is for testing. I've been writing the same test for a week for a 150 line directive, and it's driving me fucking nuts. Nothing makes sense. No one in the office to help me. Only 10% of engineers here write any tests. I don't know what to do. Overnight they made it a rule that if you want to move up to the next level for software engineers, 80% of your code needs to have unit test coverage. It's just bullshit.3
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Recently read Fish!
It's a really nice book..
Really hard to implement when you have total idiots working with you -
PM: We need to add "Under Contract" banners dynamically to listings on xyz.com
Me: No problem
[ ... a few minutes later ... ]
Me: xyz.com has been updated. Check out the listings and let me know if anything is out of place.
PM: The updates you made look great! How does this scale (in the most basic sense of the word; i.e. in the viewport) on abc.com.
Me: ? òįÓ ? ... that's a completely different site ... why would it affect it if you didn't ask for it. -
Thanks past developer for not only one bug but also the bug in your exception handling attempting to catch this bug which resulted in confusing the hell out of us for way too long due to output that made absolutely no sense
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BRO IF I SEARCH A SLOWBRO HOLDING A FUCKEN KING'S ROCK, IT MAY BE BECAUSE I DON'T OWN SLOWKING BUT WANT ONE SO WHY YOU WANT A SLOWKING IN EXCHANGE FOR THE SLOWBRO IT MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE AT ALL.
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My colleague checked in the compiled java class files on every commit, until i could convince him that this makes no sense. 😂
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Can someone, with senior experience in the whole software development process at a large scale company, come talk some sense into our development managers on how you properly run a development company??
The way we do things is wrong in so many ways, but I can't get trough to them, maybe someone with more authority will.
Like im talking about things like, no version control, being totally blindsighted to technical debt, no code review, telling me we shouldnt use 3rd party tools to track issues, tasks, etc.
Are there like intervention companies for this?11 -
How I feel about people in a meeting
Listening to someone others participating in some meeting (on speaker) (I'm not a part of):
checking configurations, talking about config hierarchies, addressing network stack limitations, etc -- all smart-sounding things. They must be very wise and experienced. It's got to be something very serious they're working on
Participating in a meeting myself:
wtf is he talking about, does he even know what JVM is? No no, this configuration does not make ANY sense. No, Mr manager, this is not how it works. Come on guys, you all running like a headless chicken - USE COMMON SENSE!!
I wonder if anyone else noticed that... I've been noticing this since the very beginning of my IT career.1 -
8:00 - 4:00 : at the office, coding non sense in-house mobile app projects which have no success at all. Two years so far !!
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When you look at a piece of code for so long to find the error that the code starts to make no sense and you question your own sanity.1
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I'm trying to load an SVG icon sprite file in a Webpack based application. It's been almost three hours with no success.
This is why I hate frontend development. Libraries are not structured and make no sense. It's a game of luck.7 -
when docker desktop lies to you it updated when you looked to update to latest weeks ago
so you try again and realize there's no fucking progress bar to get any sense of progress -
Bing image creator just refused to give me a picture of Baba Yaga doing pair programming with Zmey Gorynych.
This makes no sense.1 -
I don't know why I can't understand how to use thymeleaf. It's concept makes sense, split an html page into two so you have a header html page made up of code you don't want to change, and an index html page of content you do want to edit. But no matter what it won't fucking connect the classes.
https://stackoverflow.com/questions...
If anyone has experience with this you can take a look at my post here on it, maybe give some input. For now though I'm going to just run a single html file and make comments in my index page. :/5 -
I had a discussion - no, it was more a lobotomy - with one of our "experts"
I was kinda confused, as he had several grafana tabs open and an query editor...
He explained to me that he debugs and optimizes his query based on the grafana data....
Elasticsearch cluster with several hundred, different indices, > 20 TB data
I explained to him the scrape interval of 5secs, that he cannot distinguish his query from other queries, that there is far too much of an interference... Let alone that a 5 sec scrape interval is a very loooong time.....
Nope. It makes perfect sense to him and he'll continue to work like this. -
I frikin' love updating Gitlab, every time I do, I feel a sense of dread that some part of the process breaks and I will have to dive head first into the huge thing, with almost no knowledge of how the internals work!
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I realize that my story made no sense so Im back to square one.
The story was suppose the playerz an option on how they want the outcome to be but I wanted it to show the horror of a straight storyline. Rip -
I only prefer { on same lines if not used for class constructors & try catch blocks..
Other than that, I adapt to the existing codebase styles, to not fuck up things further, even if it makes no effing sense (old project, styles & best practises changed 'a bit')..
So I guess I'm being influenced most by the old code and pass devs on the projects..1 -
I love most trends around js, because often they're thoroughly thought through (not always) and make things easier.. but why the fucking fuck do all the js coding standards use 2 SPACES. Now this isn't intended to be a tabs-vs-spaces rampage rant. But this decision against tabs is like saying yes to a 50ct pencil instead of 100 dollars.7
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SQA here.
What do you even do when dev, other senior QA, your boss and management all give conflicting requirements for a big milestone planning while still ramping up?
My instinct tells me to do what my boss and dev tells me and to come up with the solution that makes the most sense.
No we don't have a product owner ffs. It's like a bizarre waterfall scheme. I have figure out this on my own and hope I made no big mistakes because the ones with the knowledge are unavailable to help. Been thrown in this shit and it's been 3 months I work here. I am honestly trying my best to filter the best out of this.4 -
!dev
Hello! Do you have any idea how I change the connector of a ps/2 keyboard to USB? I've tried the following schematics that make sense but no success. When I plug in the keyboard the LEDs light up for about half a second and then turn off and the keyboard doesn't work.
5 -
SQL is amazing.
I'll toss out some bassakwards query and the optimizer will make sense of it and suddenly I'm searching a amazonillian records in no time.
Then rando one day (today) I fire up what I think is really not the most wonky query I've ever written and ... "Well shit this is surprisingly slow."
So then I go full n00b and add some fields to the query that I know would limit the number of possible records to way low thinking that might help and ... nope no faster...
Guess it's time to bust open some books about SQL....4 -
As of rn life isn’t mking any sense. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I simply don’t understand anything. It’s like there are so many things I have to do as in tasks but other than that I don’t know honestly. I don’t know where this path leads me, I don’t know what I’m doing. Tbh I don’t even know if I’m on any path. . I’ve no idea what’s gonna happen. I have never felt like this but I’m feeling this right now. And I don’t know what I’m going to do about it.
Rant’s over!2 -
Imagine studying for a computer related course and to makeup for living expense, you go for part time jobs.
Now, is it just me or this is just a bad idea to get into a part-time job that is no where related to your study field?
It doesn't make sense to work in MacD or some retail outlet at all.
Any thoughts?6 -
!rant
Was too much into jquery, and so when I started my job I made everyone think jquery is the boss and stuff (my team is full of data engineers and business analysts.. No one understands code)
But now, based on my previous rant, I feel I should switch the entire project from a node/express structure with jquery to one with angular2
Does it make sense? Please advice... I am nervous of losing my job coz of this
(even now I hate typescript but I see why angular2 is better than jquery.. So I'll learn it all)13 -
To me, Bayesian statistics make perfect sense in theory but no sense in practice simultaneously. 😐1
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One user could report that the data they saw didn't make sense. Turns out there was a one-off hardcoded caching detail for one of our services that cached based on a search query (yes, the entire query was the key) and before any auth checks. The system would return the results owned by whoever asked first, no matter who asked after that point.
There's "Oh dear but we all make mistakes" and there's surrender cobra. This is what PRs are for.1 -
Working on a feature which heavies relies on a data pipeline. I noticed it is a couple of lambda functions calling each other ( Fuck you to the guy who made it). The best way to get sanity back is build a proper etl pipeline. Any suggestions for building a etl in python with reliability.
Options already considered
1. Celery tasks - Worked well but no overview of the single task progress across celery tasks
2. Airflow - Gives good overview but the docs make less sense than a 10 yr talking. Mostly because they introduced a new syntax and not everything has migrated fully yet. Also no support for reusing dags2 -
To hell with this auto path rewrite VS Code, when I rename a file you find all files and rewrite the imports, but now you did it wrong
and I have a huge mess to pick, I have no idea how you did this but you wrote long paths which don't make sense
why did you put node_modules in-front of all my imports when I moved a folder which has nothing to do with node modules1 -
Does it make sense to buy a Nintendo Switch second hand? What should I look for, besides that the console is clean and the screen has no burn-ins or dead spots?6
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I am going do do a series of .net or programming related rants. These are confessions regarding things that no one has been able to answer in way that makes sense to me.6
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A single fucking NuGet package is missing in release mode. That’s the only goddamn explanation I have and it makes no sense. Why the FUCK does ACR.UserDialogs only get compiled in Debug mode?!
God I fucking HATE UWP.1 -
Is it just me or are the majority of plugins for WordPress simply wrappers for interacting with the DB? (In the sense that there's no need for them in more modern CMSs that feature structured content functionality out of the box)1
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Learn to touch type. If you're a developer and doesn't know how to touch type, you're like an actor with no dress sense. It's one of the most basic things. Pay attention to these small things and it'll result in something huge!1
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There is an idea of Me Being Online; some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me online, only an entity, something illusory, and though I can hide my naps and you can see my green status and maybe you can even sense our availability is probably comparable: I simply am not there.
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You know. In debian, albeit it didn't work great last time I used this tool, you could build source directly into a debian package, which included the source package.
Now this was not an easy wonderful thing. But in theory it made sense, and then if you needed to add something that would alter existing configuration etc, you could add these seperately or manually..
That I know, no such thing for rpms.
But thats not what annoys me.
AFTER ALL THIS TIME WHY IS THERE NO GRAPHICAL PACKAGE MAKER ?1 -
I love how they go out of the way to allow the same photos of them to be taken. of course unless they're followed on successive runs there is no way of ensuring their capture is there which is what makes this system of theirs almost make sense if not for allowing more of their kind to be bred
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So anyone discover any good books written past 1990 which don't deal in hidden themes of your bs ? No elaborate color or number descriptions or dumbasses modifying jokes to two digit numbers that don't make sense ?
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Spent days adding cloud-init to a CentOS kickstart script for a baremetal template.
I didn't want to have NetworkManager installed but had network problems.
Turns out you need to explicitly put NM_CONTROLLED=no in the config for the interface to not use NetworkManager.
Because that makes sense.
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I learnt programming basics in C language in highschool because it was taught there and I was pretty good with grasping concepts. However, I had no intention to have career in programming or had clear idea where / how to apply programming knowledge. It was only after i made half way thru college on a stream i lost interest in...that my sense kicked in and I watched Bob Tabors C# lessons on MVA that I really felt like i know programming. Now i can't imagine doing anything other than coding / being a dev.
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