When you accidentally click the Android Studio icon:

Today I am cleaning up this mess

"We want a fully responsive web application.
Also, it must look identical to the old one written in VB6"

Congratulations on 30k ++!

How do you convince your friends to switch to Telegram / Signal (or sth similar)?

I would really like to use Signal but none of my friends use it...

Tips for backend developers

Programming for PornHub but not having to be embarrassed by the PHP.

Working halftime, getting paid for fulltime

Best advice for dev job hunting is work on your soft skills. Don't be a fucking hero, prove your teamwork ability.

Remember all the rules of all religions and social communities can be summed up in one line: "Don't be a dick!"

Been developing a Java app for 3 months, including basically everything from aop to rest services.

Meeting with po:
Me: So, guess how many loc I wrote.
Po: 400?
Me: *laughs* I'll get to 10.000 this week.

MAN COMES IN WITH CHANGING REQUIREMENTS ON AN HOURLY BASIS YET STILL DOESNT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH WORK ALL THIS SHIT IS!!

Hey, joining the community this morning. Hope it's gonna be fun!

Kisses from France!

Totally Relatable 😓😕

Dumb clients make me consider smoking and or alcoholism

Our college has PC's with Pentium Core 2 Duo processors and 1 GB RAM. We are made to code Java on windows using default notepad and cmd. There's nothing more infuriating than that.

Me: Ma'am, can we use any IDE for our mini project or finals?

She: No kid, you can't just use that. This is code you have to write it.

Me: Wut?

Idea for devRant:

Ability to filter for the local area in the same way YikYak worked. Thoughts?

C++. Damn the pointers. It's because I learned Java before C++ and the memory management in C++. I don't get it ever, the object creation, memory allocation, deallocation and everything

Xcode.
You know why.

Why do business and systems analyst even project managers try to give estimates for how long development should and will take? I hate how people who don't code and do any real work try totell me how long it would take me.

Anyone knows a good source for Pc/laptop stickers?

Java I love you and hate you at the same time!

Dear internet providers,

Please make sure that everyone can setup routers so I don't have to stand in tons of rain waiting on somebody to open me his door because I have to stick the ******** LAN cable in the wall, which he really can't do him self....

Thank you.

When you are talking with Client and he wants alert that you can't use password because it's already in use...

Now that's a creative hack

Friend: "You are good with computers right?"
Me: "Yes...."
Friend: "Can you put an eye on my computer? Mint crash at every startup"
Me: (Oh Linux! For this time ok) "Yeah, show me"

My friend open the pc...
Pc: "KERNEL PAAAAANIC!"
Me: ".... WTF!?"
Friend: "Can you repair this?"
Me: (shit.)

That was a long day...
(My friend closed the lid without the drivers and then the pc from the standby did not wake up correctly)

Boss: Come to my office right now! Its urgent
Me: *goes to his office*
Boss: Please install chrome for me
Me: *hands in resignation letter*

(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

JavaScript = C# (?)