Aww Adobe😝

OMFG! LMAO! Adobe!

BOSS: That icon is not centered, move it slightly to the right
ME: You're wrong, I can garantee you it's centered (it was centered)
BOSS: Well, my eyes are telling me it's not, so move it to the right
ME: (faking increasing margin)
ME: Ok, now it's 10 px to the right, what do you think?
BOSS: it's a great result, now it's perfect! Cant you see the difference?
ME: Absolutely, you do are the real designer here...
BOSS: Ohhh, stop complaining, you'll learn one day...
ME: Yep.

Our Adobe Illustrator teacher(he taught us a bit of Photoshop before), tasked us with entering a contest for a logo design. The company's name is synonymous to amber in my mother tongue, but instead of it doing something related to that they partnered with T.V. services etc and are doing things in the field. The limitation of the contest is that we have to use a specific color in the amber range(given with the CMYK and Pantone values), and if the design ends up a success, one gets nearly 500$.

I have an idea, but I don't know how I will be going about doing it. I'm not great at either design or drawing. My skills in drawing don't match up with my ideas...

I'll still try it.

Github education: You get a bunch of cool free stuff if you are a student.

Intellij: You get all of their IDEs for free if you are a student.

Adobe: You get a discount but you still have to pay 20€ per month as a student.

This is why I love programming and the whole community around it.

Whenever I see websites using flash

Try to open a new PDF. Adobe says it must restart. I click OK, figuring it just needs to restart the reader itself.

Reboots entire computer instead... For a PDF reader update...

Uninstall time!

My experience with Adobe...
(I recently moved to Canada)

Me: I want to give you money. (Tries to pay with Canadian card)

Adobe: Sorry, you have a US account, you must use a US card.

Me: Okay, what are my options to pay with my Canadian card?

Adobe: We have to delete your US account and create a Canadian one.

Me: Okay... Why can't you just switch the country from US to Canada on my account?

Adobe: *bullcrap response*

Me: Okay, delete it and transfer everything.

*Kicks me out of the chat.
*I log back in. Try to reconnect to customer service chat.

Adobe: AdobeID unable to participate in chat.

*I'm 30 minutes into this ordeal

Me: (to myself) I could literally torrent this program in 5 minutes 🤔

Lesson: if a company wants people to not torrent their software make it easier for a willing fucking customer to buy your software!

Since the chat doesn't work anymore, I called customer service and am still on hold.... 😤😤😤

Why does the internet have borders?

How to secure yourself from flash 0-day attacks:

1. Uninstall flash
2. Don't reinstall flash
3. Seriously, you don't need flash

Woooooooo!

Dude comes for an interview for a mobile position - one of the first things he says is "Adobe is killing Flash, don't know why, big mistake."

Many, many years ago, Apple had this software you could install which allowed you to take full control of someone else's machine. Well, my mate who was a designer worked in a different office downstairs. I was often in their fixing stupid shit problems. While he was out on lunch, i installed and configured the software on his mac. After lunch I went back upstairs and watched his every move on my mac. He was in adobe inDesign creating some design for a brochure. He was in a text box changing the heading, i seized the opportunity and took control typing in the text box "i am a useless cunt", pissing myself, I then selected the text and increased the size and made it bold... then the phone rang.

Regular day at Adobe:

Intern: Sir, I have created this amazing functionality that will make user's life easy. Shall I push it for review?

Manager: Did you say it will make their life easy?

Intern: Yes Sir!

Manager: Can we fire this intern already?

Adobe, seriously man make up your goddamn mind. Why the fuck are you taking away useful features and making them hidden under hundreds of icons you have. This is so fraustrating 😡

Modern web developer Stater pack
1.Mac with 100 stickers on it
2.Love linux but never used it
3.Border 0px
4.Border radius 2.7px
5.sketch+adobe

Colorful or black & white? 💻👩🏽‍💻👨🏼‍💻😝

Thanks Adobe for the such clear icons, I really appreciate your use of descriptive symbols (one is for "view full page", the other is for "activate single page view").

So lucky to have a date again tonight..

it's an Adobe Up-date.

.__.)'

Sister comes into my room

"Can you look at moms laptop, it stopped working I'm scared I broke it"

Ask why

"Idk it just stopped working, all I did was install adobe flash player I dont think that could do it could it?"

Top kek

Take a look

"EFI IPV4 0 (error code) failed to boot"

Weird. Enter bios

"Hard drive: [Not detected]"

Well, that's no bueno

Pop open back, hard drive is loose

Pfft, push that fucker back in

Boot -> works

"Mom is going to kill me I broke it im so worried" -> relieved laughter

Adobeflashplayerkilledmyharddrive.jpg

Shook.exe

199$ for game maker studio
Naaa i will just use godot thx

1000$ for 3dx max
Naa will just use blender 3d

899$ for Fl studio
We have lmms

Sublime text 70$
Vscode is better.. i will just use that

Adobe illustrator 19$ a month
Nice try we have Gravit Designer

What is AI?
CS student: Artificial intelligence
Graphics Designer: Adobe Illustrator
Biology student: Anthro Insertion
Pervert: Anal Intercourse

Lesson: be careful with your abbreviations

Adobe Reader everywhere

Actually just happened!!1!

Have any of you guys picked up Google Ultron yet?

"You can't run Slack, Premiere, After Effects AND Photoshop at the same time with only 8 GB RAM!"
Me:

For fuck's sake Adobe, just do the damn Photoshop version for linux.

(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

Hi this isnt actually a rant this is the girlfriend speaking (or typing hihi) i just wanna say how interesting this platform is. Bye 😊👋🏼

Wish Adobe would take a similar approach like Microsoft and release their Applications for Linux.. so I could use Photoshop and Lightroom there and ditch OS X completely...

Adobe Crash Report crashed… nice

The best part of being an university student?

- Microsoft Imagine
- Office 365 for free
- GitHub Student Developer Pack
- JetBrains Product Pack for Students
- Spotify for only €4.99/month (instead of €9.99)
- Discounts for tech products

And if you're lucky also Adobe CC and AutoCAD.

The worst part?

- The university

Adobe BR stands for Adobe Battle Royale

How would you get your "Cash prize" if you reported anonymously ...

It's a shame that Adobe doesn't support Linux for their creative suit. I know lots of artists and designers that don't use Linux regularly because of this, since Photoshop and illustrator are the de facto tools for their work. Adobe xd seems to be awesome, but I can't use on my pc due the lack of support -.-

my company just paid adobe to use pirated copy of adobe software ,arrested one emp.

Multinational company -_-
listed company -_-
premium product -_-

why the hell they can't pay money to deserve one?

writing this rant on pirated windows.

Requires windows 10 anniversary or later... So let use photo's that show it installing on vista...

Well done Adobe.

Sometimes I think back to all the funny shit that happened and how simple stuff fucks everyone

- tired Database engineer deleting (not dropping, literally rm -rf) the database files on the wrong server

- Microsoft delivering viruses through updates

- Pissed and stubborn dev deleting his one line library repo which does something like removing a char left side of string fucking an unmeasurable amount of other projects

- Adobe getting hacked and exposed for storing passwords in plain texts

- a doubled line causing a bug called heartbleed in a fuckton of webservers

- a Tutorial Company getting kicked from github because their repo got so big github staff had to maintain the repo manually

- and an old one: bad code crashed a space shuttle

So that happened. Don't want to be the responsible for leaking my company's private key.

My Google Chrome Browser is using more RAM then Adobe Photoshop while it's rendering a photo.

This is why I never do design...

A person just bought a 3000€ workstation and asked me to install cracked versions of Office, AutoCAD, full Adobe suite and Rhino with plugins. And he's going to use them at work to make money.

So, since I have to, I installed 2-3 years old versions of each, in English (he only knows Italian) and blocked all the connections so he can't receive any update/fix or use web related functionalities. I also disabled all autostarting components and contextual menu / OS integrations (although this can be seen as a plus).

When he's calling me asking to "fix" things, I will simply say "sorry, it's the only way for the crack to work, if you want everything you'd better pay for a license or else go open source".

Why can't people understand the value of the complex software they use? Just because it's not a material thing doesn't mean it's not a steal

"To use the clock you need Adobe Flash"

Really 1&1? You really need flash to show a fucking clock? Its not that hard to do this in javascript, or? Even if it is an analog clock :D There is even a tutorial of the "quality content page" w3schools about implementing this in javascript ... just whyyyyyyy? it 2018, not 2004.

(1&1 is an german ISP. This message occured in their webmailer using it without flash.)

My personal android app project started at android 1.5 and actually went to google play when android 4.2 was launched... With the look and feel of android 1.5...

Prior to that I spent about 2 years trying to make an Adobe Air app out of it.

I feel proud of my perseverance.

I can get absolutely dead pissed by the fact that a FUCKING 1800 euro laptop can't do a fucking basic thing like connecting to a bloody WiFi ap?

so why, you wonder? oh no, the problem isn't the fucking hardware. IT'S THIS DEAD BEAT PIECE OF SHIT CALLED WINDOWS. mfw when it runs fine under Linux, BUT WE CANT HAVE NICE THINGS CAN WE ADOBE?!?

Fuck you Adobe.

It doesn’t get said enough.

i also started learning adobe illustrator a few weeks ago :D

My Dream Job?

✅ 100% Remote Work.
✅ No dogshit Proprietary Stacks like Adobe Experience Manager.
✅ Reasonable Timelines.
✅ Management defers all technical decisions to you.
✅ Actually Challenging Projects.

These are my Big 5

I always liked doing interesting things with adobe tools, but today I've found a video from 2013, where I am 14. I have no idea how I did it.

Just clean installed windows few days ago and my laptop is already mess again. Anyone else with same problem? 😂 I Suck at managing stuffs.

Adobe XD will kill Sketch in future LOL

Here’s my MBP filled with stickers. Thank you for the stickers @dfox!

FRIENDLY REMINDER: Fucking save your goddamn work. Thanks.

- Your friendly neighborhood dumbass who just lost 14 hours of his life because his computer crashed.

P.S. Normally not a problem when working on code because I'm forced to save and commit with Git. Unfortunately I was balls deep in Adobe motherfucking illustrator working on wireframes, and didn't have doc recovery turned on.

This was sort of strange to see... but props to Adobe for Order 66'ing their shit.

Dfox work at Adobe??

Adobe will end-of-life Flash by 2020, and all big Browsers are joining this by disabling Flash features slowly

Let's make a petition to end-of-life Electron, it is basically Flash for Desktops and it is A RESOURCE-HUNGRY LAZINESS-PROMOTING PIECE OF SHIT THAT SHOULD IMMEDIATELY BE REMOVED FROM THIS VERY PLAnet.. what do you think about that particular idea?

#StopElectron2017smhOkayAtLeastBy2020Please

RIP Adobe Flash

1996-2020

I SWEAR TO FUCK IF ADOBE CANT GET THEIR SHIT TOGETHER

WHY CANT AFTER EFFECTS LOAD AUDIO LONGER THAN 4 MINUTES

WHY DOES IT SILENCE THE AUDIO PAST THAT POINT

WHY DOES IT NOT NOTIFY YOU THAT IT WILL SILENCE THE AUDIO

IM GOING TO STRANGLE SOMEONE

Adobe flash, why are you not dead yet. Fucking death trap

When I need to install Adobe flash player

Next task list of an Adobe developer:

1. Fuck something up so that the user has to google for the simplest possible functionality.

Adobe buys Figma for 20 billion
RIP figma

So Adobe is actually not a random name

FFS Adobe fix your payment shit, it is fucking stupid

After spending around 8+ hours on an Adobe After Effects project (which I obviously didn't save), at around 12 at night, it crashed.

I lost everything. Was heartbroken. Died inside. Nearly cried. Then I restarted the app and started from scratch.

The weird thing is I recreated the entire thing in around 1.5 hours. Not sure if I'm happy or sad with myself.

*Me for taking IDM and Adobe services*

My college teaches us Macromedia Flash, in 2018. :|
That too on a cracked version.

!Rant

Designer decide to have a meeting with stakeholders about UX/UI workflow for control panel of our new embedded system (no framework, no library, gui is bit per bit rendered on frame buffer).
A week later, still nothing on my table, not a mail, not a call. Meanwhile I wrote a framework, the control system, renderer, and messaging queues between tasks.
Wrote some widgets, a layout system and a view swtching mechanism, and a separate stack control to use a "back" button.

Now I am stuck for I do not know what should happen when clicking on various (non obvious) items on the touchscreen.
Fine, I'll ask the designer.

"Oh, I will write the workflow next week" (ETA time, 2 weeks. Seriously? You take a week to draw on Adobe Illustrator 20 screenshot with text and I have another week to write it from scratch in C?)
Ok, while you write it, just tell me what should happen when I click an active item.
"Well, we didn't talk about that. We just decided the colour of the icons on the screen..."
For fuck sake...

Adobe is predatory. I bought a subscription to Adobe Premier four months ago. After using it a little, I found Davinci Resolve (it's free) and decided it was just as capable for my needs. Upon trying to cancel Adobe, it offered me 3 more months at a good price and I thought, well, maybe I could still use it for some other things. But that didn't turn out to be true or necessary. I went to cancel today at the end of the 3 months and it said I would have to pay $94 for cancelation. I guess the fine print was too fine for my 49-year-old eyes or I wouldn't have signed up for that 3-month extension. I got on live chat with their AI, figured out how to get a real person, and began negotiating. They tried to sell me a lower cancelation fee. No. I don't want any fee. They tried to sell me other products at a lower price. I didn't need any other products. Finally, I used a little reverse psychology and said "Fine, I'll keep it. You win, I guess. Just tell me when I can cancel something I'm not using and won't be using and without being punished with a fee."

Apparently, that unlocked something in the Indian guy's call flow script and he offered to waive the fee. Just needed a moment to converse with his manager and get approval. That's 20 minutes of my life and billable time I'll never get back.

I once found a MongoDB cluster open to the internet with no authentication with nearly a terabyte of data that backed a CRM service whose customers included Microsoft and Adobe to name a few.

when did this happen?

When the design agency changes the whole fucking UI 1 week before release because they think the usability is not good enough.
FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING PLACENTA EATING LOBOTOMIZED ADOBE FRANKENSTEINS

@Apple iPadOS an iOS teams: you puZies.

You release one buggy iOS / iPadOS after another, each piling on features and bugs, without fixing crowd documented long standing defects.

But what really pisses me off is when you don't have the balls to own up to your mistakes. This is at least the 3rd time you have re-released an iOS / iPadOS update under the same version number. This time it is 14.5.1

I have iPadOS 14.5.1 installed and the iPad is now telling me I need to update to 14.5.1. Just own up to it, you released buggy shit and you need to release another bug fix days after... call it 14.5.2. Call it like it is and we respect you. Try to hide it and you lose our respect, you pussies.

If Microsoft did one thing right, they defined the release sequencing:
X.Y.Z

Changing X means rewrite the manual it is so new and improved (🖕🏻 you Adobe and FileMaker)

Changing Y means it is an update with more features than bug fixes but not a generational change that constitutes a rewrite of anything (🖕🏻 you macOS team for bastardizing with 10.X.Y)

Changing Z means you fixed your stuff, we respect you for owning up to your mistakes.

Man-up Apple, grow some balls and stop confusing people with trying to cover up your screw ups. It's all about the Z.

If Adobe would just release their products on Linux I would literally have no reason to ever use Windows again...

I had a vision where God told me that Adobe is code name for Adolf.

Serious considering wiping the Windows 10 partition on my computer.

Only thing keeping me from doing it is the Adobe Suite. Damn it.

If only they made it for Linux, life would be such a blessing.

P.S. : GIMP is not a replacement.

Oh boy, Adobe. I really miss the good old Macromedia times.

Photoshop in my country with a low dollar exchange rate, literally required 1/10th of my monthly salary when I was a beginner.

Literally go fuck yourself Adobe.

Flash has made Java programs look desirable. And anyone keeping up with me knows I despise Java and C#, despite having written C# and currently working on deciphering a Java server to create documentation.

Before I begin, I want to make this clear: IT IS TWO THOUSAND AND FUCKING EIGHTEEN. 2018. WE HAVE BETTER TECH. JAVASCRIPT HAS TAKEN OVER THIS BITCH. So, firstly, FUCK FLASH. Seriously, that shit's a security liability. If you work for a company that uses it, find a new job and then fucking quit, or go mutany and get several devs to begin a JS-based implementation that has the same functionality. There is no excuse. "I'm fired?" That's not an excuse - if there is a way to stop the madness, then fucking hit the brakes on that shit or begin job hunting. Oh, and all you PMs who are reading this and have mandated or helped someone else to mandate work on an enterprise flash program, FUCK YOU. You are part of the problem.

The reason for this outburst seems unreasonable until you realize the hell I went through today. At my University, there is a basic entry-level psychology course I'm taking. Pearson, a company I already fucking hate for some of the ethically sketchy shit they pulled with PARCC as well as overreach in publishing to the point they produce state tests here in the US - has a product called "My PsychLab" and from here on out, I'm referring to it as MPL. MPL has an issue - it is entirely fucking Flash. Homework assignments, the textbook, FUCKING EVERYTHING. So, because of that, you need to waste time finding a browser that works. Now let me remind all of you that just because something SHOULD WORK does NOT mean that it actually does.

I'm sitting on my Antergos box a few days ago: Chromium and Firefox won't load Flash. I don't know why, and don't care to find out. NPAPI and whatnot are deprecated but should still run in a limited mode or some shit. No go on Antergos.

So, today I went to the lab in the desolated basement of an old building which is where it's usually empty except a student hired by the university to make sure nobody fucks things up. I decided - because y'all know I fuckin' hate this - to try Windows. No go in Chrome still - it loaded Flash but couldn't download the content. So I tried Firefox - which worked. My hopes were up, but not too long - because there was no way to input. The window had buttons and shit - but they were COMPLETELY UNRESPONSIVE.

So the homework is also Flash-based. It's all due by 1/31/18 - FOUR CHAPTERS AND THE ACCOMPANYING HOMEWORK - which I believe is Tuesday, and the University bookstore is closed both Saturday and Sunday. No way to get a physical copy of the book. And I have other classes - this isn't the only one.

Also, the copyright on the program was 2017 - so whoever modded or maintained that Flash code - FUCK YOU AND THE IRRESPONSIBLE SHIT YOUR TEAM PULLED. FUCK THE SUPERIORS MAKING DECISIONS AS WELL. Yeah, you guys have deadlines? So do the end users, and when you have to jump through hoops only to realize you're fucked? That's a failure of management and a failure of a product.

How many people are gonna hate me for this? Haters gonna hate, and I'm past the point of caring.

nvidia makes me sick, nvidia fucks with my kernel, nvidia earned a place in hell, nvidia is shit, nvidia runs like garbage stuffed in to my motherboard, nvidia is so expensive, nvidia made my work harder and that's not what computers are meant to, nvidia's website sucks, nvidia has no solutions if you're running on GNU/Linux, nvidia owes me money, time and tons of coffee, nvidia is so much a pain in my ass.
nvidia is now on my shitlist, just before apple, followed by adobe.

I’m saving money to buy sketch, but guess what...

Adobe XD is free now 👌🏼

hello, world!

I just wanted to watch that video! who on EARTH still uses adobe flash player! seriously can anyone tell me?

Boss: We should use Adobe ColdFusion for our next project
Me: Why?
Boss: Because it's the only programming language that can generate PDF. In our next project we will be generating a lot of PDF receipts on daily basis
Me: Oh no!

!rant
My first design work (in Adobe XD)

Design has never been my strong point (implementation or design) but am very interested in designing interfaces.

Don't hold your horses. Criticize this. I want to know what you think about this.

This drawing was commented on my PR to explain the flow of a bug I need to fix, what da fuck does this means. I already told him to use a mock up tool like Adobe XD or some shit like that. Dudes answer's was "It's easier for me just to draw it"

Took me a few hours, but managed to finally run Adobe Photoshop CC 2018 on my old school Toshiba laptop running Arch Linux xD Still needs some work, but super happy I got it running :D

Pirated Adobe products are easier to use than legit ones ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Ok, which idiot at jetBrains thought it was a good idea to have "CRTL + Y" be a "cut line" (instead of redo) and "CRTL + SHIFT + F6" be "rename" (instead of just simply "F2")...

And also, which idiot thought it was a good idea to not allow us to properly change it (doing so will result in the right shortcuts doing nothing at all)...

Fuck you and your "Adobe-style" shortcuts.

Minor edit: Some idiot decided that it'd be a good idea to *only* have a custom rename shortcut work *if* I already grabbed my mouse, right-clicked the file/folder and hover refactor...
Might as fucking well continue my mouse-movement and click "rename" you fucking morons.

thank u so much, adobe community. it's such an honour to be promoted. 😂

Holy shit.

I went to uninstall Adobe Acrobat because our organization uses another PDF reader and now I keep getting annoying pop-ups from Adobe like "update failed" and "license expired".

This PDF READER... USES 7.1 GIGABYTES OF STORAGE.

We talk about Video games being bloated today but HOLY FUCK. This is literally JUST A PDF READER WHAT THE FUCK.

Can't do screenshot cus work PC.

Ummmm.... Absolutely not you're an video editor why do you need my contact information?

Received screen designs for a new website in Adobe Illustrator format with all the measurements in centimetres.

Any job interview were I have included the three years of Adobe Flash development on my resume.

A few weeks ago a client came to us asking for edits on their site. They had a developer in their office but they fired him a few days prior. After some looking at the piece of garbage they called a website I told my supervisors that it was built in Adobe Muse and from what I could find in a few quick searches it's shit and I didn't want to learn to use a shit tool. Apparently as a company we decided to hire a freelancer to handle this despite the fact that we didn't build the site and the client isn't paying for maintenance so I'm not sure why it's our fault.

Fast forward to today:
I've been in the office for 19 hours straight trying to learn how to use Muse and fix the client's site because somehow the freelancer managed to delete the mobile version of the site. When I ask my supervisors why I'm fixing and supporting a site we didn't build and don't have experience working in and the response is: we're presenting the client with a $50k proposal and we need all the good graces we can get.

Unless I'm gonna see some of the commission it doesn't really matter what we charge for the site, I make the same whether it's a free site or a $100k site.

fuck iText.
fuck Aspose.
fuck Adobe.
fuck PDFs.

It will be all too soon if I never have anything to do with programming an app to do PDF generation/manipulation ever again.

This fucking Adobe piece of shite.

I get it, you probably make one of the best editing software available out there. But if you could stop rearranging all the icons and features in your UI, that would be fucking great so that I don't have to search on the internet for hours to find out a simple feature.

Adobe, who the fuck told you to put an icon on the desktop? Knock that shit off, no one wants to open Acrobat XD from the fucking desktop.

It grinds my gears to no end as to how insanely BAD most Electrical engineering software is. Lets start with Tina. A circuit simulator. A few versions ago it was rather good but now it feel like its built upon more legacy crap than fucking Windows! This causes it to have memory access violations and crashes even when you look at it from an odd angle.
On topic of circuit simulation. LT-Spice! It has less errors than Tina but is impossible to use without being lobotomized first. Who the FUCK decided it was a good idea to reinvent keyboard shortcuts by movin all of them to the F-row at the top of the keyboard. Also there is no option to delete a component. YOU NEED TO USE CUT IN ORDER TO REMOVE IT!
And at last Altium Designer for Layouting and Schematics. Whose license costs 9 grand. No one outside of some companies will buy this because of the price. Altium realized this and made two watered down versions of it. Which dont really get updates anymore. (last one was in 2018) So they essentially made a cash grab from people who cant afford their actual product. There also exist other (and a lot cheaper) products than what Altium offers. The problem is that they dont work well with interoperability. Schematics drawn in one program will look distorted in another or not import at all. And since Altium is the industry standard you got yourself this nice steaming soup of impossible collaboration. Its kinda like Adobe being absolute shit at progressing their software just because they got no competition. Or rather they do but the industry wont switch cause adobe is so engraved into it.

!rant

I’m a backend - spaghetti - developer, and today i took the biggest mindfuck in my life when i found out that it’s possible to have functional mockups... at first glance i tought that i’ve only received a screenshot collection of what the designer did... guess what... i was able to click lè buttons and go trough the whole application flow.

Thanks Adobe for xD ...
I should get a freakin designer job.

Joined a new project and started messing with the application...Greeted with a blank web page and a pop-up **please enable flash**

Because of Steve Jobs,
We lost our Jobs.....
Flash developers thoughts....

Adobe Flash

In school.
Adobe viewer has stopped working xD

New company issued desktop is running win7 *criiiiiinge*

Solution: run linux on VirtualBox!

Efficiency++
Productivity++

I. HATE. DELL. WITH. MY. GUTS.

Their low tiers products are full black plastic overpriced fuckshit, if you press too much the cover you can actually destroy your display. Fuck shitty laptops and fuck this shitty laptop in particular. It's slow. It's so slooooooow. It's everflying fucking slow motion, being on the web is like being in the matrix while dodging bullets made of wordpress plugins. The only good thing I can say is that is living right now, it has been... Three years? I only picked it because of high discount and ubuntu preinstalled (that made me think: oh, maybe they have components that are linux compatible regardless of distros. It was not). I'm enjoying Manjaro, when I'll have the skillz i'm going full Arch.

I will start university this fall. It's going to be a math major. I absolutely need something better than this anyway. I am also freaking out because I don't know which genre of software they could want to make me install and if they're windows/mac only. In the meanwhile I do photography, video, design and as you may suppose Adobe is often my go-to; I also have to build a workstation at home. I am freaking out because WELL FUCK WINDOWS 10 AND ITS PRIVACY NIGHTMARE PERIOD.

Which laptop I buy?
How well does heavy software run in a Windows virtual machine (on the desktop, not the laptop)?

VsCode.

I have been on a journey with editors, all the way back to using edit.exe in Windows 95, to notepad, MS FrontPage, Adobe Dreamweaver, PHPDesigner, vim, nano, then out to Eclipse, Atom, Brackets, notepad++, back to Atom, then VsCode.

And by far, vsCode has given me the most productivity and customisation of them all to not care about what project I open, what language it's written in, or what frameworks are working behind it. I can switch with workspaces and everything is setup to go, yes it's a pain in the ass to setup, but it's a ducking dream to just open and jump in.

Now being able to use VsCode for Salesforce has dropped any requirement for me to keep eclipse around.

Please just let me cancel my 1-year subscription for the end of that one year NOW without only giving me an option to cancel everything right now and still pay 54 € fee, that's not only silly, it's what makes customers shout FUCK YOU Adobe! Long gone the good old times, who needs your outdated stuff in 2022 anyway?

In my classes whatsapp group
*posts a ppt*
person 1:how do I open it?
person 2:use adobe reader
me:*bangs head in the wall*

I'm a dev and I like to rant

And who says it has to always be about Dev stuff ?

So!!! I ve spent 2 days as a junior dev and I feeel not well... 1) I am the worst dev in the company with no experience 2) brain-dead 3) feel like I wasted 2 days and learnt nothing, I guess in theory it's something but realistically I had no "it clicked" /pure genius /astounded myself / made major new brain connections moments

So what's going to happen now. ? When will I wake up? How do I wake up ?

Because in #Adobe's utopia world, #everyone is a local admin.. and is super computer literate and knows how to use the terminal to change permissions. Oh wait no, the fact is the world is filled with organisations whose users act like monkeys in a cage and absolutely cannot be trusted with admin rights.

And yes.. the 'repair' does nothing, of course!

Ughhh Adobe.. get your act together.

Fuck adobe. Sucks even on m1 shit .

Nothing like good old Adobe flash on Windows 2000 to keep air lines on time... Oh wait, what? Their computer system crashed again? Oh well, never mind :(

I recently joined to a company. I am recent grad. I was getting KT by my Manager during team on-boarding.

The manager showed me the tech stack they use for the application. It had the given logo.

My manager read it like this - "We also use Adobe here ....."

I muted my mic and laughed so hard, and now I am searching for jobs at some better company- where managers don't confuse AngularJS logo with Adobe.

Got my stickers! Thank you @dfox! 🙏🏼

Lost hours of work...
Adobe XD crashing when resizing window...
(ToT)/~~~

So I was planning on a single page website for my relatives hotel websitte and offered to make it for free ( as an offer for other huge project i was doing for same person )

But just got told that one of my uncle told to tell me that website design should like the website design of another hotel xyz.

For second, I thought that other would be very nice. So I checked it out.

Guess what! That other site looks like it hasn't updated since 2005! No HTTPS. No responsive design. Looks like fugly crap from 2005 to me. Has a huge Click to enable Adobe Flash banner on homepage.

I lost my hope in humanity and I quoted a price for making that. I guess I just gotta do a shit job and will get paid for it now 😂

So to un install Premie Pro I first need to sign in to my Adobe account, to then fucking update Creative Cloud, and then, then I can remove the garbage. Or so I hope ffs...

I work 3 PM to 1 AM as a daily office job. Then go home and try to learn programming. Wake up next day at 8:30 AM for kind of another work until 1PM. Doesn't pay as much but I have to try. Then if I get free time do some freelance on UPWORK with whatever little graphic designing I know to help pay the bills.

And the fact that even my laptop is dying is a huge blow. Don't know when it might give up. Has 1st gen core i5 dual core, takes ages to load Adobe softwares. I have wanted to hulksmash this shit, but can't.

If I'm lucky, I get a stress free 6 hours of sleep a few days a month. And my depression doesn't help. More sleep should ease me a little, but I can't afford to waste any time. But this is life, isn't it.

How we miss those invisible and invincible update notifications! #adobeflash #goodriddance

Does anybudy still use Adobe Animate/Flash for web animations?

They teach it at my school and at the moment I see no reason to use it. I'm probaly faster writing it by hand in CSS / JS, and it will run smoother that the animate files...

*pirates Photoshop*

...

I was flash developer once, it was great when macromedia was around, then adobe acquired them, now flash is gone.

Years are passing and most of industry is the same as always. Trying to drag you into this rat race of learning new amazing technologies, amazing projects that are actually doing same job as 50 years ago but using more memory and cpu cycles. Because all has it’s roots in algorithms from previous centuries.

So youngsters loose your best life time, be innovative by doing nothing more then copy paste from stackoverflow and duck typing shitty code.
Be a slave and sit in the amazing office, that has everything but not your real life that meanwhile is sucked by corporate squeezer till your last breath.
Be piece of shit that can be kicked around.

Watch youtube, facebook, instagram or whatever social network that shows you pictures that are fooling your mind that you’re someone special and you need this stuff.
Then be ready to suck some dicks to earn money and buy stuff you don’t need, live where you don’t want and do what you don’t like. You piece of shit.

Well that’s what disappoints me from my tech stack.

Now chill out, turn off your electronic gadgets, go out and enjoy real world.

Adobe labs released one new component, I played with it after two days. Went to an interview with huge company after two weeks for a developer position, the interviewers was from different departments, they asked about one technical challenge they have, then I suggest the new component as solution, they gave me small task to implement using the component, I delivered it next day... Then they hired me in R&D department. It was great days.

Adobe flyweaver

Okay so i graduated last year and got a job working for a place that sadly disappoints me in their web development practices. This place uses a dead technology(my opinion)called Cold Fusion by Adobe. They do not use any form of version control like Git and their sites are very shitty and the design and development is implemented very poorly honestly. It honestly makes me sad that i feel like im smarter than my department vp. That being said i do not feel challenged here and am looking to collaborate in some open source projects via Github preferably.I dont consider myself an expert in this field but i would say im about intermediate level in web development. Im pretty comfortable with HTML,CSS/SASS,PHP,JS/JQuery, and im pretty comfortable in the PHP framework Laravel. So if anyone is interested in collaborating or starting something up, id be so down for it. :)

Designer using Adobe Muse can output html. says to me... "Sorry. It looks like I've taken your job" oh dear.

I still use CS6

If you ever think your job or stack absolutely suck ass.

Just remember there's someone still working with ColdFusion in 2023.

I was pretty upset at my loved one today. She asks me how to save a file into a PDF, so I explained how to print to PDF from chrome, pretty simple, good so far. Then...
-"Hey, the file has an 'e' for internet, will they need internet to open the file?"
-No, why would they?
-The file has an 'e'
-Did you name it 'e'?
-No, but it has an 'e' like internet
-... You mean the icon?
-Yes
-Right click, click on properties and change the default program to Adobe...
-Oh God, it's so complicated, I'll ask someone else to do it
-What? It's literally 2 clicks!
-Why does it need internet?
-It doesn't! It's just the default
-The what?
-Cheez! Doesnt matter, just go to properties and click on 'Change'
-Fine! Done now what?... Ooh...
-Now click on Adobe Acrobat
-Awesome! Thanks! Now it's fixed, I'm so glad because I'm about to send it on an email and I'm sure my boss would have thrown a fit if they weren't able to open it offline
-😒

So I heard this story from my boss,

Boss: you applied to the open web developer job?
"Pro": yes i have designed many websites.
Boss: are you good with css?
"Pro": Yes i am really good with adobe Cs(6).

We don't have a designer yet in the team so we had to learn Adobe XD on the side to prototype our ideas. After months of getting the hang of it thinking this semi-free tool will work for us to save some money, Adobe decides to change their pricing plans starting in April 2020 and it will no longer be free. It feels like Adobe trapped us to get used to their platform and then secretly slap us with a price tag halfway. We can't blame them since we're all trying to put food on the table here. We started exploring Figma today and oh boy was it a gift from the gods! The features are so much better. They make our workflow faster!

Since the last Windows Update broke my wife's laptop (the WiFi driver doesn't woro anymore) she's moving to Linux. I hope it goes well since she is a non-techi. I kinda am excited.
The biggest problem will be the lack of Adobe Illustrator. 😕

Apple, next time you want to get me to upgrade my file system, please FUCKING TELL ME IT WONT LET ME INSTALL WINDOWS USING BOOTCAMP, 9 hours and I’ve only just found the file system that will let me run Adobe Cloud and Windows

Adobe's ExtendScript toolkit is abyssmal. I find posts from 2008 referring to issues that have not changed even in CC2017. Do you think they are small issues I'm bitching about? I'll list 2. First, the toolkit only colours "var, return, for, foreach" and a bit more keywords and the strings, of course you can set up color schemes but those are limited and not colouring stuff. The second issue is auto-complete, it rarely kicks in and suggestions have 0 connection to what are you doing and are always the same. It doesn't recognize anything of what are you doing.

Probably in 2008 you had to program with the manual near you like writing assembler, now there's an improvement in 2017, they got a window named object browser or something like that that actually is a summarised portable manual that could've been easily transformed in auto-complete suggestions.

Adobe writes about this and I quote: "a complete integrated development environment". Although I will not write much scripts in it, I need to write a big one and thought about extracting that object data and putting it in a more capable javascript editor. LO and Behold what I discovered, the ExtendScript Toolkit that's supposed to edit Extended javascript and save it as jsx or jsxbin is almost completely (it has some dlls too) built using around 100 jsx files. It's the equivalent of building a js IDE to edit js.

Sorry for formatting, I'm on mobile, I tried.

So I was working on a website for a club in my college. I designed a pretty decent UI and at first everyone accepted it. So I made a working website with my friend, made backend with node and all was set.

After that, the fucking member of club brought in another graphic designer for changes. And they literally made the whole website with heavy images. The designer made heavy neon backgrounds in Adobe Illustrator and didn't even compressed it.

They made the whole fucking website with images and they ran it all on localhost and were happy with the speeds! ಠ_ಠ

They even put an image in fucking Navbar!

And then I left that project, I could not see more destruction.

Adobe fucked up

Web Developers opinion on Adobe Dreamweaver? Thoughts?

In a recent venture, I had to use an office suite and a photo editing software regularly. As a Linux user, I tried using Libreoffice and gimp. But that was just a mess. My other project partners were using MS office. Format, image alignments, fonts.. everything was messed up. Same happened wih the gimp. I know Photoshop, learnt while studying. Gimp was just no match to that. I was forced to go back to Windows. And I was surprised that the latest MS office and Adobe Creative Cloud were excellent. MS office was smoother and faster than Libreoffice.

I love linux. I have tried all the major distros and I love all of them. But I would still say that Linux is not the best option for day to day non-dev tasks. Whatever Richard Stallman and the Open Source Community say, Linux lack good softwares, at least some good document, photo, audio and video editing softwares.

We're both senior devs, I use nodeJS/Python. Stop forcing your Java *superiority* shit on me. I can write the API using either language. Also fuck your JVM. FUCK THAT SHIT

Graphic & Web Designer
(job offer)

- graphical proposals for:
-web pages,
- banners,
- presentation materials,
- gaming graphic,
- application (iOS, Android) graphic...
Bla bla bla...

Min. 2 years profesional experience...
Valid certification and lvl of proficiency in (Adobe Photoshop, I lnDesign, Illustrator)...

Fast delivery....

Salary 3,50€ brutto / hr 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣....

Jobs in Slovakia 🤣

Adobe Muse is... Nope, I don't have any words to describe that tool 😓😓

Wait, I have a word... Sux

Adobe Creative Cloud: "Sign In Required".

I don't have Photoshop, XD, or any Adobe product open.

No "close window" button in dialog.

My choices are "Continue" or "Sign In Now".

Errrrrrrgggggghhhh...

Does people still use Dreamweaver?

Was using Windows Movie Maker all this while, didn't know Premiere Pro it's father

Adobe finally released a version of Flash that doesn't suffer from zero-day exploits.

As a teenager learning to code on a computer given by my parents

It hurts to see announcements like mobile development has some limitations on 32bit, or Github Desktop, Adobe XD and the new Unity only supports 64bit

"For front end developers that don't like Sketch". Say what!? Sketch is the best thing that's happened to front end designers in terms of design tools. Anyone who prefers Photoshop to Sketch is a sadomasochistic.

So in the context, I ragequitted my school at the end of the 4th year (out of 5, so no diploma). I was broken, poor (the only money I got was my parents), and mad as fuck.

I took a 2 month vacation during the summer where I did strictly nothing, then I sat down to my computer, opened Rubymine and started building my new website (current version actually, new one is in progress)

Right after that, I downloaded the trial version of Adobe InDesign and created a better / updated version of my old CV, and put it on LinkedIn, Viadeo, everywhere. At first, it didn't work much since all my experience was about underpaid internships, so I honestly had no work experience on the paper.

Then, while answering to a job offer, I put my CV on Monster, before I realized I should have done this from the beginning: next 3 mornings I had 5 phone calls, and 2 appointments per day for 2 weeks 😁😁

My current job was one of the firsts that called me, but made me wait a whole month (through appointments & shit) before answering me "Yes" one tuesday at 10 pm, on my way to take a shower. It's been 10 months now 😁

Just boosted my Starling/Adobe AIR game engine's performance by 60%! active code time per frame @ 60fps reduced from 50% to 19%. Now I have more room for lighting effects :)

Got our snazzy new HP Elitebooks from IT. Nice lil laptops.

Guess how many apps they installed for us off the list of "Applications Devs Need" that was submitted with the original request that they asked us to provide.

Goddamn 0. 0 Apps installed. ”Instead here is admin access, install what you want.”

Being a PC guy I don't mind setting up a new environment but things like Office365 and Adobe CC could of been installed for me, I don't have the licence info offhand so now I gotta bug IT again and why ask for a list if your not going to install any of them?? Ugh. I don't have time to sit here while Adobe installs the whole suite....

/rant

What's the first thing you install on your new PC? I find I grab ConEMU first.

go fuck yourself with your fucking communities. i went into computing because i like being left alone. who are all those fucking freaks building their communities? this is capitalism mother fuckers, everybody in the world agreed on it, on each person being an independent individual doing their job to the best possible standard, instead these low-skill low-iq oversocialised sheeple started conglomerate into communities and brainwash everybody that this is what it is about. get stuffed alright. all my life i've been introverted, just leave me alone to write code alright? take my library i don't mind i'll take yours no strings attached, just push the code and forget about it. but no, all these degenerate morons without CS degrees have occupied our safe space, pushed us out of it and just can't get enough of using the buzzword "community-driven" "volunteers" volunteer my ass assholes you can't even make software nobody in real industry needs you because you have no skill at all you learn a bit of js which is any 14-15 yo can do and now think you're some kind of prodigies, unsung heros of humanity who selflessly bring the progress. nothing can be further from the truth - because of you we don't have real software, we don't have investment we don't get no respect everybody walks all over software engineers treating us like shit, there's an entire generation of indoctrinated parasitic scum that believes that software tools is grown for them on trees by some development teams that their are entitled to automatically, because some corporation will eventually support those big projects - yeah does it really happen though - look at svelte, the guy is getting 50k a year when he should be earning at least 500k if he had balls to start a real businesses, but no we are all fucking prostitutes, just slaving away for the army of people we never see. are you out of your mind. this shit should be fucking illegal alright it's modern day slavery innit bruh, if a company wants to pay their engineers to work on open source this is fine, i love open source like java or google closure compiler, but it's real software made by real engineers, but who are all these community freaks who can't spend a 10 seconds on stage in their shitty bogus conferences without ringing the "community" buzzer? you're not my community i fucking hate your guts you're all such dumb womenless imbeciles who justify their lack of social skill by telling themselves that you're doing good by doing open source in your free time - mate nobody gives a shit alrite? don't you want money sex power? you've destroyed everything that was good about good olde open source when it was actually fun, today young people are coerced into slavery at industrial scale, it's literally impossible to make a buck from software as indie unless you build something really big and good, and you can't build anything big without investment and who invests in software nowadays? all the ai "entrepreneurs" are getting fucking golden rained with cash while i have to ask for a 5$ donation? what the actual fuck? who sanctions this? the entire industry is in one collective psychotic delusion, spurred by microsoft who use this army of useful idiots to eliminate all hounour dignity of the profession, drive the abundance and bring about poverty of mind, character, as well as wallet as the natural state of things. fucking amatures of course you love your shitty little communities because you can't achieve anything on your own. you literally have no personality, just one homogenous blob of dumb degenerates who think and act all the same. there used to be a tool called adobe flash builder, i could just buy it, then open and make a web app, all from start to finish in one program, using tutorials of adobe experts on youtube, sure it might have had its pitfals but it was a product - today there's literally no fucking product to make websites. do you people get it? i can't buy a tool that i need to do my job and have to insult myself by downloading some shitty scripts from some shitty unemployed devs and hope my computer doesn't blow up in my face in the process because some freak went off his nut and uploaded some dodgy ass exploit on npm in his package. i really don't like. it's not supposed to be like that. good for me i build by own front/back end. this "community" insanity is just a symptom of industrial degeneration, they try to sell it to us like it's the "bright" communist future but things never been worst, i can't give a shit about functional programming alright i just need to get my job done mate leave me alone you add functional because you don't know how to solve the problem properly, e.g., again adobe flex had mxml where elements had ids and i could just program to id, it was alright but today all this unqualified morons filled the whole space after flash blew up and adobe execs axed flash builder instead of adapting it to js runtime, it was a crime against humanity that set us back to 1000s

Html5 vs Adobe flash. Html5 won
Html5 vs java Web embedded app. Html5 won
Therefore Html5 vs java 3 billion devices. Ans=?

If you need workarounds and tricks to make your computer obey you, your operating system is trash. MacOS, Windows, I’m looking at you. This is indisputable.

Instead of defending that crap, just admit it. You did nothing wrong. You was forced to use it, because I understand that not every piece of software can run on Linux. Perhaps you earn money using Photoshop or any other Adobe software. There’s nothing wrong with it. You don’t become a baby-eating trash supporter billyboy if you’re just using an OS.

Perhaps you like macOS UI better than KDE or Epiphany. There’s nothing wrong with it either.

But please don’t defend trash just because you use it for one reason or another. Admit it to yourself and say “yes, the OS I use is a piece of crap that doesn’t respect users, but right now I’m forced to use it because of the software I make a living with”. This is the only non-traumatic way to start defending your rights.

Peace

My dad was using notepad to edit some HTML for his website. I downloaded Visual Studio Code and he likes it SO MUCH MORE. (I wonder why....).

Kinda happy I could help him with it. He is pretty good at coding but just hasn't done it in a while (not his trade) so he doesn't know all the new tools and such.

FUCK YOU, ACROBAT!

Anybody knows any good Linux alternative to Sketch or Adobe Xd?

Around the time Apple was denouncing it, I joined a chatroom for Adobe flash game developers. I really loved the idea of making games too, so I tried to learn ActionScript3. That failed, because it was my first language and since I was broke, I couldn't afford flash pro, so I was using an open source ide with okay documentation, but no newbie coder tutorials. I didn't actually start learning to code till Codecademy came out, I learned js, then I learned visual basic and Java for online courses the local community college had available, and now I'm taking C, C++, Java, and Python in college while I use C# at work and JS during my free time. Sadly, in a jack of all trades, master of none :/