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Prototype devRant rubber duck. Depending on my craft skills, might have a variety of dev themed capes too
34 -
- Sleep 7h+ each night (you think you don't need it - but you do!)
- drink NO coffee (you've slept enough!)
- pair-up (you're not as good as you think)
- get a grasp on the problem (it's time will spent!)
- communicate constantly (you're not alonw especially)
- refactor just as much
- learn from you partner
- celebrate even small accomplishments (you need success!)
- go home and do something else (your pet project does not need more than 5hrs per week!)
- repeat (because repetition makes perfection!)18 -
One of my bosses is walking through the hall brushing his teeth, and another is cooking waffles with a waffle iron. It's 124032
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Client: the platform isn't sending emails
Dev: I'll look into it
(Finds all emails are being sent without issue)
Client: I just tested and I'm not receiving emails. This is obviously a site wide bug and I'm upping the priority to "Critical". I'm also getting everyone over here involved.
(Looks into clients account)
Dev: you didn't turn the setting on to allow emails to be sent to you.
Client: this is still a site wide bug that is affecting everyone.
(Provides screenshots showing emails are being sent and opened. Client closes ticket and doesn't respond anymore)11 -
Boss: I can't open the website.
Me: What connection you using boss? Try to switch to LAN cable. Our office wifi a little bit wonky today.
*plug in LAN cable
Boss: Ahaaaaa! It works now. Please, next time make you develop website wifi compatible.
Me: ****8 -
So im colorblind and i just recently found out that most IDEs use color syntax and it sounds like such a good idea.16
-
Me: Did Sherry let you know that I'm leaving today?
Coworker: what!? No!
Me: yeah... I'm leaving.
Coworker: huh, I'm not surprised...
Me: what is that supposed to mean!?
Co: shit man, this job sucks, I'm not surprised. I'll be leaving right behind you.
Me: oh.... Um... April Fools... 😬
Co: God damnit.
Me: don't worry, I won't tell the boss how you really feel.4 -
Someone at Google: how do we make Android build times quicker?
Someone else at Google: we could make a new button next to Run and call it 'Instant Run' and give it an awesome lighting bolt icon!
First someone: what will it do differently?
Second someone: nothing 😎14 -
*alright,let's go to bed now*
*finally in bed and about to sleep*
*figured bug out in head*
*gets out of bed, fixes the bug*
*gets back into bed*
.
.
.
*heeeey wait, if I do it like this.... *
*gets out to fix second bug*
*back to bed*
.
.
*Hoooold on... *fixes third bug while laying in bed**
*really has to go to bed now 😩*24 -
You have done a great job!! Thanks for delivering the project on time. It is exactly what I asked for. I will ask for no changes and I will pay you right away.
Said no client ever.3 -
Give a man a program, frustrate him for a day. Teach a man how to program, frustrate him for a lifetime1
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When CS professors are lazy to grade so they think they can just give you any grade without you questioning them...
Me: Hi Professor, I see I got a 94 out of 100 on my 2nd project. Your comments said, some of my functions didn't pass your junit test cases.
Prof: Yes!
Me: How come? I tested it several times before submitting and they all passed the test cases. You gave us the test cases to write the code for.
Prof: Yeah, but some of your functions aren't passing on mine.
Me: Since I'm in your office, can you please run it again so I can see?
Prof: Are you doubting me? I gave you the project and I'm telling you they're not passing my test cases.
Me: I just want to make sure because I did work really hard on this project to pass all the test cases. *Runs the code to show him on my laptop and they all pass*
Prof: Fine, let's run it together on mine again. *He runs it and they all pass on his laptop*..hmm, that's weird. They didn't pass when I ran them. Maybe, because of the IDE I used earlier.
Well, looks like you get your 100.
Me: Thank you but which IDE did you ran it in that failed? Just wondering..🤔
Prof: Doesn't matter now...they're passing. Just be ready for your next project...you guys will be writing the test cases yourself this time..9







